Almost. Its A Big Word For Me. I Feel It Everywhere.

Almost. Its a big word for me. I feel it everywhere.

Almost home.

Almost happy. Almost changed.

Almost, but not quite. Not yet.

Soon, maybe.

'suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem'

I think it's past temporary when I've felt the same for 10 years now

I feel like dying disappearing hurting myself running away from everything crying my eyes out yelling from the top of my lungs forgetting everyone becoming a ghost leaving everything behind never existing again punching myself until I learn my lesson never speaking again falling from the top of a building crying to my mother for not turning me into an abortion

But I'm here, at my desk, numb heart, blank face.

Forced to keep on living.

And tomorrow I'll wake up again.

Unfortunately.

—Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club