I Feel So Freaking Foggy Today--yay Concussion, Ugh--and Don't Really Have The Capacity To Write, I Don't

I feel so freaking foggy today--yay concussion, ugh--and don't really have the capacity to write, I don't think. Definitely not to edit or format anything (I do most drafts on my phone but they look like Blitz's worst attempts). I'm so sorry, I know it's been a slump on both of my blogs. But! I'm feeling a little better now than this morning, like I can turn my head without getting this weird little soft wave of dizziness, so am gonna sit at the computer for a while and work on clearing out the inbox.

Guys again I am so, so sorry for not getting out starters and replies to starters. I love you fuckers. I am just apparently halfway broken. Don't get concussions, this is dumb.

"Oh yeah?" Cheery as could be, Blitz stretched out a few kinks, shook himself, then stretched again. "What did we miss? Sure wasn't our targets! Record time, and it was pretty fucking artistic, if I do say so myself." He tugged on his lapels with a ridiculous smile before going over and flopping down into one of the chairs by the conference table.

Loona, who was maybe a little less enthused than Blitz, sat at her desk with a grunt. "It was a machine shop. My fur is full of little fucking--ugh. Metal shavings!"

Blitz looked over at her. "You want some help, Loony?" he asked, momentarily forgetting that Millie had new for them.

Loona bared her teeth and growled. Blitz couldn't help but beam at her, give two thumbs up, and then settle down to spin around in his chair a few times before he stopped and actually focused on Millie, trying to be serious.

"Sorry, Mills. What's up? And how come it smells like electrical shit got overheated in here?"

That sort of comment only made her more curious as to why Vox seemed to have it out for Striker. Considering that imp was someone that normally went after royals it'd be interesting as to why he got into a predicament with an overlord of all people. "My company is one of the most trustworthy ones out here. Especially considering we don't judge when it comes to wanting to kill someone." Millie states. She gives off a small shrug. However she doesn't push the topic further. Even if she still was curious as to why he had it out for Striker. The good thing was that she can defend herself whenever something goes wrong with someone.

But being on Vox's bad side wasn't exactly something that she wanted. She was curious about him honestly.

Whenever he zapped himself away she couldn't help but blink a couple times. How she wished that overlords wouldn't do that. Millie always forgot that they practically had magical abilities. It truly wasn't fair. Though at least Blitz had the crystal now, so that was kind of like magic.

-

Eventually Millie notices the portal open and she knows that everyone was back now. It was going to be something else telling them about what she had experienced while they were gone.

"I take it everything went well then?" Millie questions. When she's lifted up she can't help but giggle as Blitz nuzzles her face. He was honestly too adorable sometimes. Her eyes light up at the mention of food. She hadn't eaten yet and trying some more earth food would definitely hit the spot. Millie reaches out and takes the bag, pulling out one of the burgers already so that she could chow down. "You definitely missed something."

When a certain someone posts super sweet things--or anything at all, they can come on and just post anything! literally if they were like here is a picture of a blank piece of paper that I like, I would be like oh fuck yeah that's an excellent piece of paper--it brightens my day so much. And not saying that this person made me happy cry this morning but there are tears on my face and I don't know how else they got there so gfdhjklgshdfk

It's such a warm feeling, when you're so freaking excited to see someone that you just like, care whenever they post or are around. Whether it's silly things or sad things or serious things, they show up and you just like, can't stop smiling? It's kind of really freaking great.

Maybe this was a mistake. Instinct kept demanding that it was a mistake, that it had to be a mistake, that going to talk to her tonight was only going to end badly for both of them--but that same instinct, Blitz knew, was born out of way too many years of just trying to survive, way too many years of always being at odds with the world, always fighting the world. But now? He didn't want to fight anymore. At least, not against anyone--and not against Vizzy. But damn if the imp wouldn't fight for her... which meant, terrifyingly, that he had to fight himself and his own damn impulses to run.

Dressed simply tonight, in comfortable jeans and a tight but torn white sleeveless top, Blitz didn't entirely blend in as well as he should have, but he still drew a few lingering glances and touches. He ignored all of them, focused on just weaving his way through the crowd to get to her--and trying, desperately fucking trying, to figure out out what the fuck he was going to say to her. Hey girl, you dying inside? Hey babe, what's up, I noticed you looked too long at the abyss and now it's caught you, what's up? Viz, sexy badass, totally still just a fling, I'm worried you're gonna disappear inside yourself one of these days and not going to be able to reach you, so what the fuck, we need to talk? Not really great conversation starters, any of them...

Especially considering that recently, it almost felt like she was suddenly putting the brakes on, suddenly pulling away from him. Which, fuck, Blitz could respect that, he could understand it, and he would respect it--if he didn't get the feeling that for Vizzy, right now, doing that was a form of self-harm. There was something in her eyes, some ache, some kind of loneliness, that if Blitz didn't at least try to reach out and offer a connection for, he was one shit-fuck of a boyfriend. Not to mention, he had seen that beautiful photo on her phone, a moment of love frozen in time and--and what? Held captive by pain? By ghosts and memories? The woman who had been with Viz in the photograph, a Sinner named Dhallia, wasn't around anymore. And not just not around as in not seeing Vizzy, but not around as in, Blitz had used I.M.P's resources to seek this woman out and there just wasn't any sign that she was still alive.

There was, unfortunately, every sign she was dead. And if she was dead, and something to do with that death was fucking Viz up and she was suffering alone? And that was why she was pulling away?

Blitz couldn't let her leap. Not alone.

If she jumped, he would jump with her.

That much was already a given.

He was hers until she told him not to be, and he was going to take that fucking seriously, for once in his life, and be the lover his person deserved.

So although his head was a mess by the time he made it to her, Blitz's heart was sure of this course, at least, and that was something. He walked up to her, gently cupped the back of her head with one muscular hand, and kissed her--slow, loving, but not long enough, not nearly long enough, at least not for him. But the kind of kisses Blitz wanted with her maybe weren't the kind she wanted right now, and he had to respect that.

"Hey, babe." Blitz straddled her lap, resting his wrists on her shoulders. "Working too hard? Or hardly working?"

I love you. Fuck. I'm not going to lose you to depression or trauma or whatever else is happening. If you choose to let me go, that's one thing, but I'm not gonna lose you to the darkness, Viz. Whatever it takes.

Blitz's eyes gleamed in the semi-darkness, but they were focused only on her. However many people might be in there dancing, drinking, and playing away the pain, Blitz saw only one person. Right now, there could be no one else.

(Angsty starter for @doublejango because I have literally ZERO impulse control. X_X -- It was a busy night down at Kingdom Cum, drinks flowing freely and gyrating bodies covering the dance floor and the performance stage alike. Cigarette smoke swirled through the air like church incense and the dark sensuality of the heavy pulsing beats filled the club with an especially vibrant energy that was felt by all. All but one. The club owner, herself, sat at a private booth with an ashtray and half a mai tai on the table in front of her as she watched the throng of partying patrons with a hollow gaze. Even as she sat there in her beloved establishment, surrounded by all the things she loved and had worked so hard to achieve, her mind was miles away--it had all started out so damned simple. Harmless fun, a companion she could turn to when she needed a physical release, be it rampant violence or a heated tussle in the sheets. It had been so uncomplicated and freeing ... until it wasn't. It had been a subtle, insidious little thing at first. Laughing at all his stupid jokes, texting and calling throughout the day about more than just partying and fucking ... and before long, he was occupying her thoughts all the damned time, from the moment she awoke until her head touched the pillow each night. It was all too familiar in the way that he made her feel warm and safe--a paradise that had already been poisoned once before by her own failures. Never again ... she could never risk getting that close again. And yet, as she tried to gently pull away, Visage found herself reeling with the realization of how hard and painful it was to re-establish that emotional distance between them. No matter how much she tried to withdraw, she still found herself instinctively reaching out for him, a yearning that made her chest ache. And the very thought of causing Blitz pain by pushing him away was an unthinkable agony that she couldn't even consider inflicting upon him. The line had become so damned blurred ... but she didn't have it in her to cut him off completely and return to the solitude. What the fuck, then, was she supposed to do...? Well, she was going to need to figure it out sooner rather than later, because unbeknownst to the morose Overlord, a familiar imp was already making his way through the crowd towards her table...

"I can sorry the fuck outta people! Just you watch! I sorried Fizz so hard he cried! And I can sorry more people, everyone but you! 'Cause I don't owe you dick!"

HELLUVA BOSS 2.09 - Apology Tour

Also that lil goat was the most precious, pure, angelic being in all of creation and I am SO PROUD OF THEM.