He Watches TV Like This

he watches TV like this

- A Psalm for the Wild-Built, Becky Chambers // kagonekoshiro

do not mlem the cat

>mlems the cat

wind in my hair, i remember it

they're gross

my second request: I'd love to read any headcanons you might have for ftm katakuri? 🥺❤️

a/n: took me a bit to get around to this but hell yeah i do!! >:D

ftm/transmasc headcanons (Katakuri)

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A hypermasculine man who's incredibly secretive and feels like he has to blockage himself up just to hide the "vulnerability" of him eating? Yeah, I can see a few trans hcs for Kat

Kata has an easier time than most on the Grand Line with getting his hrt and gender affirmation surgery just based on the sheer resources Big Mom has alone

He can't help but feel at times it's a performative acceptance though - that oh, he's just another diversity point for Mama's utopia so of course she'd take in his new identity with open arms without fully understanding him or why it's so important

He got a few confused looks from his siblings as well at first, but they got used to it over time; so long as Katakuri played the new role he so desperately wanted as a son with absolute perfection, he was allowed to make the change

I think it's important to note as well considering their age that this smooth transition was partly because Katakuri identified as a binary trans man who got the hormones he needed and "looked the part" post-haste somewhere in his early teens (but having always been described as a 'tomboy' even before that)

So it was easy for his cis peers to wrap their heads around the idea that oh, their brother was just a guy trapped in a girl's body, or some similar false sentiment that a trans person's person wasn't their own

Brulee was the first one to notice, with the help of her devil fruit, just how much her older sibling would avoid mirrors and resent the image reflected back to him, how he'd force himself not to flinch whenever someone got too close to his body but the absolute tension he carried everywhere was obvious

The rumors weren't too ridiculous back then, he was still a boy (with unfathomable expectations of being Big Mom's "best" on his head) allowed to sleep in his own bed, and Brulee was the one who saw just how many times he wanted to sink into it

If there ever was anyone kicking up a fuss about it when they were young, Brulee would be the first one to tell them off - even if it was an older sibling - and the second to jump to Kat's aid was Oven (very much in a "I don't quite understand this but I love you so I'm going to support you regardless" dudebro kind of way)

It was a huge relief to see how much happier Kata seemed after his gender affirming care, although with that did come the heavy burdens of masculinity - further burying his emotions not just for the sake of his beloved family, but also because that's just not what men did and that's how it always was/would be

Katakuri was very obsessive about passing growing up, he'd agonize over his posture, speech, mannerisms, anything to make sure he was walking the walk and talking the talk - where he'd been so desperate to avoid mirrors before, now he was constantly checking them subtly from the corner of his eyes to make sure he was performing his role (masculinity) well

It takes years and Katakuri well into his adulthood to disentangle presentation from identity, he hates to admit it but it's not like he was raised in a vacuum; the prejudices and hypocrisies of Tottoland have seeped well into his bones and now it's up to him to contend with that for his own sake and younger siblings, cherished family, who fall under similar but different umbrellas along the way

So, for a long, long time, he doesn't - Kata believes he has the luxury of simply not thinking about it because he has "more important things" to keep his mind occupied, to keep that nagging feeling that something's not quite right tucked deep in the recesses of his psyche

Times are changing, however, and Katakuri quickly realizes that within this New Era there are more and more people living their lives unrestrained, unbound by the confines of rigid gender stereotypes that he fought tooth and nail to uphold within himself, desperately beat imperfections away in spite of himself to fit the mold he was taught time and again he was supposed to embody

But now he sees that he sees the error in his ways, he's scared, scared of what that means for his identity, scared to face the queer siblings he's unintentionally hurt with these impossible standards, and for the first time in a long time Katakuri finds himself woefully out of his depth

And that leaves him with no choice but to ask for help or get washed beneath the new waves of progress