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Lost (PG10) pt.3

Summary: The world is utterly unfair. He was her most prized possession, her life, her first ever commitment of love. But to him, she was just a mere person lost in his big world.

warnings: ; unrequited feelings; Pierre is a douche , arrange marriage, angst, explicit scenes and languages.

Author's Note~ Heya guys! So it's finally here! Tbe 3rd part of my fanfic.I posted the first chapter of my first ever fanfic! And I'm overwhelmed by the response ❤️ Really Thanks a lot to everyone who had liked the story so far. It's just the beginning of the journey, there's a lot to come. Love You All 😘 Here's my first ever story for you guys. As soon as I finish this one, I'll start taking requests maybe! Till then please show your love and support for "LOST".

Journal Entry - 3

Pain is something that can be forgotten if that one person that you love gives you a smile. Butterflies, jitters, rainbows! Yea, that's my heart right now. I can melt right away. Right in front of him. Pierre Gasly has a beautiful smile!

Those sparkling eyes when he smiles has the power to light up my whole world. But why did he smile at me today?

Let me tell you what exactly happened.

I woke up a little late today because of all the crying I did yesterday. I went into the washroom to take a shower and freshen up and when I saw myself in the mirror I was scared of myself! Like seriously I look like a fucking zombie! Tear stains and melted mascara stains all over my face. But what's worse are my eyes. They were blood red and super swollen. No makeup, no face wash could cover that shit up. But I couldn't let Pierre see me like that. So the only thing that I could think of was wearing sunglasses. BIG BLACK SUNGLASSES! That too inside the house cause I wasn't allowed to go anywhere outside unless it was one of his races or events, where we'd have to pretend to be a super happy and In love kind of a couple. Life Sucks for me. Anyways I changed and was going to go down when I heard noises coming from the kitchen. Other than me no one usually goes inside the kitchen , so who might it be?

A little bit curious and also frightened I went inside the kitchen only to find my ever charming husband sporting the brightest radiant smile I've ever seen. My Husband Pierre Gasly! Standing right there with black shorts and a tight fitting black tshirt. His muscles stretching and struggling from it. The tshirt seems to be too tight but he still looks like a prince.

To be very honest it was a bit weird for me. Okay chuck it! It was very weird for me but I just played it cool by returning a very awkward smile to him.

" Good morning and thanks Y/n" Woah! That was the first time he actually wished me good morning. I seriously felt like I was on cloud 9 but I don't really keep high hopes in life anymore since I have lost a lot of things in this journey.

"Good morning to you too , but why thank you?"

"Oh! Yes, actually thank you for yesterday. You prepared the soup and the medicine for Julia" those words made me want to stab myself . After a whole night of torture and tears he finally finally smiled at me for the first time and that too the reason was Julia. That bitch of a step sister. Who is stealing my husband day by day from me. But who cares if the person who's supposed to actually care does not care about me.

I sometimes think if he ever thinks about me? About my happiness or, I'm just a mere housemate for him? Actually what's funny is that even the housemates are treated better than I am . Also I'm a bit disappointed. Why did he not ask me why was I wearing those hideous sunglasses? Why was I late to wake up this morning? But no, no questions of such were asked by him.

But you know what? I'm not complaining cause this was the first time he actually smiled at me properly.

That's all I've ever wanted. A little bit of genuine recognition from him. Not because of the camera's, not because of the families. Not pretentious.

And so I , Mrs.Y/n Gasly is again LOST!

LOST in His Radiant Smile!

PS - Please lemme know what do you think about LOST and also let me know if you wanna be added to the tag list ❤️

@peachiicherries @crimeshowjunkie @oblomovissad @torossosebs @janeholt3

Lost (PG10) pt.1

Summary: The world is utterly unfair. He was her most prized possession, her life, her first ever commitment of love. But to him, she was just a mere person lost in his big world.

warnings: ; unrequited feelings; Pierre is a douche , arrange marriage, angst, heartbreak.

Author's Note~ Heya guys! So I had put out a post about getting motivation to write something up, so thank you to all for commenting and encouraging me! Love You All 😘

Here's my first ever story for you guys. As soon as I finish this one, I'll start taking requests maybe! Till then please show your love and support for "LOST".

Journal Entry -1

LOVE....It's something that i have always yearned for.

Even if it's fake. A little bit of admiration, a simple compliment can make my day. 

It's been like this ever since my brother, Isaac Conti left the world. I started living with my step mother Annie Conti and my step sister Julia Conti. Yes, Isaac was my step sibling too but he never made me feel like i'm not his own sister.

My brother was the only one who actually loved me and admired me to the fullest in this family. My mother was an Indian and was forced to marry my father after she saved him from an accident when he was travelling in India. I was a part of a mistake. Ever since my maa died everyone except my brother treated me like shit. Even my father. 

But then i met him. My love of my life, the most important person in my life. My husband Pierre Gasly, the playboy of the F1 track!

Once again life played a merciless game with me. The man that i'm committed to, married to , bound by vows is in love with someone else. To be more clear he's in love with my sister Julia Conti.

How pathetic am i to have a life like this huh! We've been married for about 7 months now because that was my brother's last wish before leaving us. Pierre was his friend and he thought that getting me hitched would've been the best thing to do, but to think of it , it was his biggest mistake. He knew i've always had feelings for a certain blue eyed boy, thus, his decision, but what he didn't know was that Pierre has always been in love with my sister and married me only to get close to her. Pierre cleared everything out for me once we came back from the reception right after our wedding.

Now it's been a few days, two months to be exact that they've been dating , oh! and also sleeping around. What's sad is that i've caught them a few times during action in his bedroom. The only thing that i could do is simply go up to the terrace, look up to the sky and cry my eyes out calling out my Maa and my Brother. I don't blame Isaac for anything.  It's all my fate. 

I'm a pathetic excuse of a human as my husband likes to call me, who does not deserve anything in this world except for tears and sadness.

If you're wondering if Pierre had always been like this? Then let me tell you No! 

It all started after 1 month of our marriage when  he started talking to my sister more and giving her more attention. The lies that had been fed to him by my Step Mother and Step Sister about me is what he believed at the end of the day.

Life has always been a mockery for me. I am not allowed to speak to anyone, it's not like i have any friends to talk to. The only thing i am useful for is to tag along with Pierre to a few of his races or a few other important events as his trophy wife just cause it's an obligation.

No one really knows what happens in our life everyday, not even his grid mates. I'm sure it wouldn't have made any difference seeing they are his best friends. I'm not even allowed to talk to them even if i've seen them around at parties and races. I think my attitude has probably led them to think that i'm a snobby little bitch just like my Step sister. Oh yes! I do use bad words sometimes cause why not? I'm supposed to be able to do at least certain things in life right?

It's not like Pierre is going to read what i'm writing here? 

I've given up everything, every little dreams of mine, SO if you ask me if i think that Pierre is ever gonna love me back , then my answer is No!I would never even dream about thinking that he's gonna love me back.

But there's one person who always looks out for me, he's my only friend I suppose, and that's a certain ferrari driver with a charming smile that always lifts up my mood.

Anyways,I'll just sit aside and keep loving Pierre forever, even after he leaves me for my step sister after a year of our marriage. Just 5 more months to go. 5 more months to be with him. 5 more months to stay by his side as trophy wife when he goes out for parties and races. 

His world is a big one. Where he has got his grid mates, his family, his fans, his work people , my step sister even my step mom...... Everyone except for good ol' me....

I, Mrs. Y/n Gasly is just a LOST case in his big world...

Let's see where the upcoming 5 months take us....

PS - Please lemme know what do you think about LOST and also let me know if you wanna be added to the tag list ❤️

Don’t hurt yourself

Chapter 1 - Intuition

Masterlist

Prologue

Warnings: Mention of possible cheating, mention of relationship neglect

Words: 2.372

“I tried to make a home out of you, but doors lead to trap doors, a stairway leads to nothing. Unknown women wander the hallways at night. Where do you go when you go quiet?

It's a cold day, the heater is on, and I’m wearing more layers than necessary, but I’m still getting goosebumps. I might even start chattering my teeth if I gave in to what I'm feeling. But I don't think it's just because of the cold, It's less than 8 degrees outside, but the heater is doing a good job here.

I haven't looked at her in a few minutes, I sit in the chair by the window, and the only view I have is the bustle of the city below me.

“The view of Monaco from this window is beautiful. It's a great location.” I remember that was the first thing I noticed when I stepped here for the first time five years ago.

“Y/n…” The woman stares at me while sitting in her armchair in the middle of the large room. “Why are you avoiding this matter?”

“I'm not avoiding it.” I still don't look at her.

“I think you are. You ran away from me as soon as I mentioned his name. And it's been 10 minutes that you don't even look at me.”

I take a deep breath before taking my stare off Monaco and back to her.

“What do you want me to say?”

“We don't need to talk about it. But every matter we start leads us back to him. Did you notice that?” I can barely look at her. Susan always calmed me down, and that's the reason I started doing the sessions with her. I always enjoyed our conversations. But not today, today I just want this to be over so I can get away from here.

“As it should, he is a very important part of my life.”

“Of course, he's your husband. He is the person quoted by you in every session of ours. But not in the last month.” She wears a friendly half smile, and her hands are resting on top of her crossed legs. She doesn't have her notebook today, which is unusual, but it doesn't bother me, I never like to see her taking notes regarding what I say here anyway.

“Y/n…”

Another 15 minutes and I'm out of here.

“What happened in the last month?”

Her voice comes out almost like I'm underwater. My thoughts are so loud that I can't focus on anything else. I need a few seconds to understand what she just asked me.

A humorless laugh seeps from my vocal cords.

Where could I start? For the part where he completely changed in such a short time? Of how overnight, Lewis was someone else? A cold person, who stopped calling, stopped with the flowers, with all the caress, with the dozens of “I love you” said every day? That I don't look like a wife anymore but more like a roommate? Or maybe I should talk about the times he came home at four in the morning and woke me up when he was almost inside me, desperate for some relief, desperate to release whatever God knows who put it in him? From the reclined car seat or the cheap feminine perfume impregnated in the seat belt. Which of these things should I open up and tell her about now? And how do I do that without feeling like an idiot, without the huge guilt monster that's inside of me creeping out again?

I shrug as I feel my throat burn with the painful memories of the last few weeks.

“Maybe I'm just too insecure. Or dramatic. Or both.” I don't talk to her anymore. My spoken words are more like external thoughts.

Susan doesn't say anything, she looks at me as she waits, and the silence makes me want to talk more and open up.

“He's in one of the worst moments of his career. There's too much going through his head, I know that. I can't freak out thinking he's having an affair just because he is distant, right? It doesn't make any sense. I can't be that cunt.”

“Do you think he's having an affair?”

“No. That's the point. He wouldn't do that. He's too good to do that.”

Susan shifts her position and leans towards me. Her gaze doesn't stray from mine for even a second.

“The real Lewis wouldn't do that or the Lewis you created in your head wouldn't do that?”

I look at her and the confusion is clear on my face.

“What?”

“Don't you think that maybe you put more into him than he gave you? That you created a version of him that doesn't really exist?” My heart is pounding like it's going to jump out of my chest at any second. I want to look away from her, but I can't. I need her to finish her reasoning. I don't want her to think I'm not ready to hear this, so I keep still as I wait for her to continue.

“You've always tended to romanticize things, which is understandable with everything you've been through. But maybe that led you to believe in some things that were almost not there while letting other important things pass right under your nose unnoticed.” Now it's my turn to lean to her. “You told me once that you always dreamed with a fairy tale, and that when he appeared, it showed you that it was all real, with butterflies in your stomach and vows of eternal love, everything as in your biggest dream. You fell head over heels in love with Lewis. So I ask you Y/n, which one wouldn't do that to you? The real Lewis or the one in your imagination?”

I try to assimilate what was said and play her words over and over in my head. For the first few seconds, it sounded almost like a joke, it was so ridiculous. But the tightness in my chest got bigger, and suddenly some things started to make sense.

“Think about it this week.” Susan gets up and walks slowly to the door.

That's the cue, my cue to get up, thank her for the session, and leave this room. But I can't move, I'm still sitting in the chair staring at the Buddha-shaped figurine that rests on her coffee table as if it's going to come to life and tell me what I need to do.

“Y/n.” I feel Susan's hand on my shoulder, and I come out of my trance. I turn to face her. “I didn't mean to say that what you live is a lie. But sometimes we do this kind of thing. We intensify what we feel and put a lot of feelings into things without even realizing it, so we can convince ourselves that something we really want is really happening. But that doesn't take away the shine and beauty of any of it. It doesn't take away the fact that everything you feel is real to you. For everything you tell me here, I'm sure you have a beautiful life with him, and that kind of thing doesn't go away. My job here is just to try to show you the things that are clear around you, what you're going to do with it, no one can tell you. Because no one would know how.”

I continue to look at the woman in front of me for some time. Trying to assimilate everything.

“We're done for today, okay? It was all very intense, and anything we talk about now won't have any effect anymore.” I nodded to her. “I'm going out to take a break, but you can take as long as you want here, Y/n. Take your time. Everything is fine.”

“Thank you.”

I watch Susan leave the room behind me, and as soon as the door slams, I'm back facing the city. I could stay here for hours, but I know I have to move and face what is waiting for me.

I don't even know how long I've been looking out the window, I'm only taken out of my trance when I hear the notification noise coming from my phone. I check the device quickly before getting up and grabbing my purse.

“I'm waiting for you down here ;)”

All the way to the outside of the big building, I feel weak, and numb as if my movements are being commanded by someone else. A thousand worries in my head, until my stare met his. Even though he is the biggest cause of all the chaos in my life at the moment, at the same time, he manages to remain my biggest font of calm.

“You didn't tell me you'd come to pick me up.” We are already very close to each other. There is no need for me to try to get closer because Lewis does not take a second to pull me closer to him.

Lewis join our lips in a quick kiss, and that shocked me. It's been a while since he last showed any interest.

“Where did that come from?”

“Can't I have missed my wife?” I feel uncertain, and I know it shows on my face, he barely looked at me in the morning, and now he acts this way. It is an unfair and single-player game. “I saw that you left your car in the garage, so I deduced that you could use a ride.”

We live two blocks away from here.

I've been walking back for five years now. It's almost like part of my therapy walking down the beach to get home on the way back.

I wish I didn't feel like something was very wrong, but I can't. After these last few days, everything he does sounds suspicious to me. And living that is like a living hell.

I push away any negative thoughts and smile at him. He seals our lips quickly before opening the passenger door. I settle back and take a deep breath before facing him again, who's now sitting next to me.

He's too good to do that.

Not a second after he turns on the car, Lewis takes his hand to my thigh and squeezes it lightly. I look at him who already has his gaze glued to mine. I can't help but smile at him. He let his hand rest on top of my thigh as he takes speed with the vehicle.

“Mercedes will organize a charity dinner on Saturday.”

“Cool. Here in Monaco?” I was already expecting something like that, another day without him, I guess.

“Yes. It will be the usual boredom with investors. But it would be nice if you came with me. Are you up for it?”

I look away from the street and look back at him. There he is, the man I've been looking tirelessly for the last few weeks. All of this is so confusing that suffocates me. Change so much in just a few hours, it's almost scary. But I decide to hold on to this moment and believe that I have my husband back.

“Sure.”

Lewis smiles before removing his hand from my grip and placing it on the steering wheel. I look away from Lewis when I notice the car pull to a stop. Only then do I realize we're at a gas station.

“I'm sorry, I need to fuel up. Otherwise, I don't think we're going to be able to get home.”

“No problem.”

“Do you need something?” He says while opening the door to get out of the car.

“No. I’m good. Thank you.”

He slams the car door, and I watch his figure make his way to the inside of the convenience store.

Maybe it was just a bad phase, and as usual, I tried my best to become something about myself. Thinking about it, everything could have a good explanation.

I'm an emotional person. I tend to overstate all my feelings, and almost always this leads to a bad place, which hurts me. As the masochist that I am.

I have no reason to imagine such a thing. Lewis wouldn't do that to me. I know who I married, and I also know that we've changed and grown together long enough that we can't do that to each other.

Maybe I was too over the top to think and doubt him and my trust in him. Maybe.

I try to turn on my phone screen, but the only thing that comes up is the low battery icon.

I open the glove compartment to look for the charger cable while still looking at the device in my hand, when pulling the white wire, I hear the metal falling on the floor, and only the low sound emitted is enough to make me worry. I close the glove compartment calmly before taking my hand to the floor to pick up the object.

I can identify what it is as soon as I pick up the small object. My stomach drops. I don't remember leaving any jewelry here. I bring the piece to my vision and stare at the small bracelet in my hand. A bracelet that isn't mine.

I snap out of orbit as I stare at the object. There's nothing else around me but me, this ridiculous bracelet, and my wedding ring burning on my ring finger.

No. No. No.

He's too good to do that.

He wouldn't do that to me.

The real Lewis wouldn't do that to me.

lust 01 / anthony bridgerton

𝓈𝓊𝓂𝓂𝒶𝓇𝓎: the man you despise so much is suddenly in the arms of someone else and that makes you realize you actually have real strong feelings for him

𝓌𝑜𝓇𝒹 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓃𝓉: 1.3k

a/n: hii everyone! long time no see, a lot has been going on. but i have missed writing so much because it is my special place where i get to write and escape reality for a moment. and so i have finished watching bridgerton season 2 and… i was SHOOK. had to write something about mr anthony, hope you like it!

part 02 | part 03 | part 04 | part 05 | part 06

—–

Anthony Bridgerton. One if not the only person that has been irking you and continues to mendel with your life. It’s like everytime you think you got rid of him… there he is again. Although it is not entirely his fault. Your Mama has been eager to get you married this season even though you were not picked as the Diamond this year. Which was unexpected as everyone and their mother thought it would be you. But to you it was great, as you did not wish to marry someone just so you can get a title or have someone to sponsor you. You wanted something real, real love which seemed impossible. But that brings us to the person mentioned in the beginning,

Anthony.

Keep reading

Summary: You had always loved him, would always do, however, did the oldest Bridgerton brother still like you after all that had happened between you? Are there any feelings that come back to the surface, after not seeing each other for years? Was the love truly unrequited?

Unrequited

Part 5

“Hmm..”, you had begun. “I think Daphne is going to marry a Duke someday. I just have a hunch.”, you had continued as you had leaned towards Anthony

“A Duke?”, Anthony had spat out. You had only raised your eyebrows in amusement. “What exactly is wrong about a Duke?”

Anthony had just shaken his head. “Just that every Duke I know is not a respectful man.”, Anthony had stated.

“I think the son of the Duke of Hastings is. He’s going to be one some day. And he’s quite hands-“

Anthony had rammed his elbow into your stomach, trying to silence you and looking at you in annoyance.

“What?”, you had laughed. “I think he’d be an excellent choice for your sister.”, you had grinned.

“Oh! And what about Lord Toussaint! He’s going to be a Duke someday, too. Oh I bet he’d be a nice husband.”, you had added, enjoying the way Anthony’s jaw clenched.

“None of them are going to marry Daphne, I assure you.”, Anthony had answered.

“Oh, come on! I’d marry one of them and Daphne would and we’d both be Duchesses.”

Anthony’s eyes had widened, turning to you with a stern look on his face. “Absolutely not. You are not going to marry Francois.”

You had leaned your head on Anthony’s shoulder, feeling more than safe when you had inhaled his scent. “Well, a Viscount wouldn’t be so bad, would he.”, you had mumbled, before your eyes had closed. You had been tired the whole day and feeling Anthony near you had brought you immediate comfort.

Anthony had needed a second to process what you had just said, and when he had, you had already drifted off into sleep.

And he had sat there, with you sleeping on his shoulders and a stupid love-struck grin plastered onto his face.

“And, did the Duke find a wife yet?”, you asked Francois, focusing on his shiny blonde hair rather than the stage.

You were avoiding it as long as you could, you would only be looking when the opera began, keeping your eyes on Francois as long as you could.

“He did not, unfortunately.”, Francois smiled at you. “I haven’t found the right one yet.”, he added quietly.

“You’re marrying for love?”, you rose your eyebrows, clearly surprised. Many men, such as Dukes, married only to seal an heir, a mere business arrangement.

“Mais, bien sûr! Of course! I’m a hopeless romantic.”, Francois laughed a little, his eyes sparkled when he did.

“I’m happy I met at least one man that believes in it.”, you grinned at him. “Why exactly though?”

Francois did not even take a second to answer. “I think love is the reason for our lives. We love to find love, to experience the feeling of it as it consumes your whole body and mind. We love to feel that pang in our chest, to feel our breath being taken away, to feel our heart beat quicken. I mean why else are we living? I wouldn’t want to have a wife who I don’t love, who doesn’t love me.”

You held your breath as Francois talked, thinking of Anthony the whole time he did. How he took your breath away, how your heart beat when he was near you, how your hands grew sweatier. “You’re very sweet, Francois.”

You could hear as the people grew quieter, the curtain slowly opening. You took a long breath, adverting your eyes from Francois to the scene in front of you.

You admired all the golden details admist the read of the opera, you admired that the Duke had his own box in there, assuming he was visiting the opera quiet often.

And when a beautiful young woman stepped into the stage, having brown curly hair and wearing a white shining dress, your breathing abruptly stopped.

Siena Rosso was beyond gorgeous, her hair shinier than yours, her eyes brighter than yours could ever be, her dress more beautiful than any you owned.

It was not only her appearance, it was the way she moved her hand so elegantly, the way she began singing and made it sound like a sweet poem whispered into your ear.

It seemed like she was everything you weren’t. The thing that hurt the most was not about how she looked, but that she had the thing that you wanted the most.

She had won the heart of Anthony Bridgerton.

When Francois caught on your distraught, he moved his hand over to yours, silently asking you for permission.

You looked down at your hands on your lap, before you nodded. Francois slowly took your hand into his, intertwining your fingers.

It brought you comfort, the way his hand was so warm, the way he slowly stroked it with his thumb. He wanted to help and you gladly accepted it.

“You know what my mother always told me?”, he whispered quietly, not expecting an answer.

“S'ils ne voient pas que l'amour fait partie de leur vie, alors ils ne méritent pas d'en faire l'expérience.”

You looked up at him, the words sounding more poetic than Sienna’s singing. Francois’ voice was so soothing, sounding absolutely beautiful to you.

“And what does it mean?”, you murmured, fascinated by the French language.

“If they don’t see that love is a part of their lives, then they don’t deserve to experience it.”

“It’s beautiful.”, you let out a shaky small laugh. “If he doesn’t see that love is a part of his life, he doesn’t get to experience love with you, ever.”, Francois explained to you, his thumb still stroking your skin.

You nodded at the man. “You’re right, my Lord.” Francois shook his head. “You can just call me Francois.”

“Thank you Francois.”

The two of you left your seats after everyone else, spending more time in catching up on your lives and talking than listening to the singers.

However, you knew that Siena had been a great singer, that her voice was beyond description beautiful.

So, as the two of you slandered along the seats, watching everything in awe, Francois took your hand and led you to the opera singers at the front.

You were lucky everyone had left, Francois taking your hand would be beyond scandalous. Nevertheless, the opera singers did not care.

“Bonsoir, Ladies.”, Francois smiled at them. “It was delighted to see you all, your performance was exceptional.”

You carefully watched as Siena scanned the both of you, looking between you suspiciously. “Your voice is truly a wonder.”, you addressed to her.

Siena turned to you and as much as you wanted to hate her, you couldn’t. It was not her fault in the slightest, she probably did not even know about your existence.

And when she offered you a small smile, you knew that she was just a woman like you, who had fallen in love with the undeniable charm and sweetness of Anthony Bridgerton- or former sweetness that is. ”You are flattering me.”, the brown-haired woman grinned.

You smiled back at her, Francois‘ hand squeezing yours in a sort of comfort. “I’ve never seen you around, are you new hear, my Lady?”

You shook her head. “I was living in the countryside for a few years. I must say, none of the opera singers their are even half as good as you all are.”

Siena grinned at Francois. “I already like her.”, she whispered as your eyes swiftly wandered around the opera, now empty and without the eyes of the ton on you.

“Thank you. And I guess you two-“, Siena brought your attention back, looking at your intertwined hands, then at your face and Francois’.

“Oh, no, we-“, you began, but Francois beat you to talking. “Not yet. I might have to prove my dancing skills to her and Lady Danbury to even be considered as a suitor.”, Francois looked down at you, his eyes shining with adoration.

You bit your lip, your cheeks getting warm as you looked at your feat, trying to hide your blush from both Siena and Francois.

“Well, I only wish you the best. Future Duke and Duchess.”, Siena winked at you, excusing herself in a rather rush as she walked to the changing rooms.

You furrowed your eyebrows, but brushed it off as you nodded at Francois to get going.

You shouldn’t have looked back one last time. You should have just walked out, without sparing the opera one last look.

You should have kept your attention on the man next to you, should have had a evening without any overthinking, without thoughts plaguing your mind the whole night.

However, something inside you had told you to look at it one last time, to let go and understand that Anthony Bridgerton could never be your man.

And when you saw the familiar brown hair, even if only the back, you felt quite literally like someone tried to push a dagger into your chest, trying to reach your heart.

Nonetheless, only when you let your thoughts wander even more, seeing as Anthony moved to the direction of the stage, quite possibly wanting to go behind them, your mind seemed to fully comprehend the situation.

He was walking into the same direction Siena had just rushed to. The dagger in your chest pushed harder until it finally did reach your heart.

Anthony was going to see Siena, their relationship was not an old one like you had hoped the whole time, Siena was still his mistress, his lover, the one who got to know the feeling of his soft lips on her, the taste of his lips, the feeling of his hands on her waist, of her hands in his, she could-

Siena was able to get to know what Anthony’s love felt like, because she was the one receiving it.

When Anthony entered the living room with sweat dripping down his forehead, a frown spread across his face and hair standing everywhere but where it should, Eloise and Benedict quickly hid the newest Lady Whistledown behind their backs, knowing exactly that if Anthony would read it, his state would only worsen.

“What is it?”, Anthony asked, stalking forward. Eloise’s eyes widened as she looked at Benedict, silently asking who should run away with the paper.

Before either of them could even stand up, the paper was snatched away from their hands, Anthony’s eyes scanning it carefully.

Eloise only watched as his jaw clenched, his fists balled. The oldest Bridgerton shook his head, mouth slightly agape as he spared Benedict Bridgerton a look.

Tears were already evident in his eyes, but he would never dear to shed them in front of his siblings.

Benedict shot him an apologetic look, trying to offer him a smile. Anthony just bit his lip and crunched the paper in his palm, throwing it as far away from his as he could, before stalking out the room with heavy steps.

Violet Bridgerton furrowed her eyebrows, picking up the paper and trying to unfold it, before reading what had made Anthony as mad.

And as it appears, dear readers, the Duke of Florence, Lord Toussaint, has finally set his eyes on a beautiful Lady, old childhood friend of his and without doubt the best choice for a new Duchess. Lord Toussaint was seen with her at the opera just yesterday, both of them leaning into each other a little bit too close for friends, whispering things without listening. However, as the author was not in the same box as them, I can only assume that their talking was surely not about the beautiful singing. I can only wish this to be the next love marriage this season.

“Well, I guess we have to invite Lord Toussaint for dinner tomorrow, too.”

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