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Another Life (part 6)

Sweet Home FF | Hyunsu x Eunhyuk

Retrospectively, it never even occurred to Hyunsu that Eunhyuk wasn't planning on leaving together with the rest of the Green Home survivors. 

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This memory pulls another one from the recess of his mind. An early one, one that Hyunsu seems to have lost in the backlash caused by his cursed wing, or perhaps it was the greedy monster inside of him that had hoarded it for his own safekeeping, holding any minor spark of hope and desire that Hyunsu might've ever felt like a snare around his neck.

Or maybe it was him, hiding it away instead.

The faded memory is of a fleeting kiss in the dead of the night. Nothing more than a caress, really. A misguided press of lips against his own when the scariest thing was the monsters roving outside, when there was still hope for salvation as indicated by the governing military on the flickering, late-night news and a sense of belonging, a place they could call home.

The Green Home apartment complex, a high-rise in an neglected redevelopment area, has always been a sight for sore eyes with cracks in its walls and untamed gardens full of weeds, yet in this memory it seems to shine brightly. 

For a few weeks it had been Hyunsu's whole world. 

They sit in silence in the cramped arcade room that smells of mold and old sweat, just after another raid of the abandoned apartments upstairs. The setting sun paints them in burning orange through the tiny, reinforced basement window. Hyunsu is exhausted, his body still not fully mended from the fall he took when he got thrown around like a rag doll by one of the nastier monsters, first into a wall and then down the stairs from the tenth floor. There's a tiny furrow nestled between Eunhyuk's fine eyebrows where he kneels in front of him, one wiry hand poised under Hyunsu's chin to keep his dirty face angled under the light. 

The sharp smell of antiseptic is gratifying in the way it cuts through the thick, tense air. Hyunsu doesn't know where to look, brown eyes wide and unblinking as he stares self-consciously at the murky ceiling, while Eunhyuk swipes meticulously with a sanitized cotton pad across his temple with careful strokes, wiping away grime and caked up blood, only to find the skin beneath already healed. 

Eunhyuk sighs and pulls away, throwing the used pad into the bin on the floor next to them with a little more force than might've been necessary, causing Hyunsu to jolt like a startled animal.

He coils instantly into himself with a strained wheeze, pressing the curve of his spine against the chipped wall while quickly tugging his legs up onto the makeshift cot. The plastic slippers slip off his feet with a loud smack against the floor and Eunhyuk grimaces faintly as he's left to helplessly watch Hyunsu hug his knees tightly to his chest and then push his forehead into the circle of his arms, desperately trying to disappear into the void of his own headspace.

Now that Eunhyuk is done playing caretaker, Hyunsu expects to be left alone so that he can heal in peace. Yet, he can still feel Eunhyuk hover above him when he stands up with a faint squeak of his sneakers and a rustle of his clothes, his piercing gaze burning where it lands on top of Hyunsu's head.

Hyunsu stiffens, steeling himself for a reprimand, a stern talking to for wasting their already meager medical supplies when he doesn't even need them. He's bound to regenerate with or without their help; flesh knitting together into one solid mass and bones cracking, rearranging themselves into place. And sometimes it hurts so damn much that he hopes it'll be his last time. Still, they should've just left him lying at the bottom of the stairs, where he'd landed with a loud smack onto his back, spine fractured in several places, until he's lucid enough to stand on his own again. No one asked them to drag his mangled, lifeless body across the whole damn entrance floor back to the arcade, letting the other residents flock around nosily to watch in disgusted awe. 

No one asked anyone to do anything at all. 

So why is Eunhyuk still here? Hyunsu doesn't need an audience while he wallows in pain.

Nonetheless, Eunhyuk sits down carefully next to Hyunsu's curled up form — a tense ball of green with mismatched socks — and asks in his serious voice, "Does it hurt somewhere else? How are your ribs? You're breathing strange. Let me check."

Hyunsu shrinks immediately away when he senses Eunhyuk's hand hover in the air next to him. He clutches even harder at his elbows, pressing his knees tighter together and urgently shakes his mop of shaggy hair, trying to divert Eunhyuk's unsought concern.

He doesn't need this sort of fleeting kindness. It will only make him weaker, breathe life into an impossible dream. It's already enough that he has a duty here — protecting all of these people — a fundamental purpose to keep him going. Hyunsu doesn't need more, doesn't even dare to ask. He's not worth it. Not after what happened to his real family.

A sigh and then Eunhyuk scoots away to give him some space, hands simply resting in his lap as he studies Hyunsu in the dim light, head tilted to the side. 

Eunhyuk is quiet for a few minutes then, letting the dense silence fill in the blanks as he goes through his options; of simply giving up and not dealing with Hyunsu and his fragile self-esteem. There's no time for any delicacies right now. As long as he doesn't turn on them and keeps doing his job of scouring the upper levels for food and other necessities, then it doesn't matter what kind of state or mood he's in. As long as Hyunsu does what he's told to do. That's all they need him for.

But then Eunhyuk's hands curl into fists, blunt nails scraping against denim, as he recalls the way Hyunsu's slack face lit up with the faintest of smiles. It was a fleeting thing that Eunyu managed to coax out of him with her unconventional social skills, delighted to share her questionable knowledge about the world. And Eunhyuk wants to try again. 

After all, Hyunsu isn't really a monster. He's just a broken human, like many other of them. 

The only real monster here is Eunhyuk. 

He knows what the other residents say behind his back.

"Please. Let me check that everything's alright and then you can rest," Eunhyuk presses sternly, naturally slipping into his leader mode, patiently waiting for Hyunsu to come out of his hiding. God knows he's handled enough tantrums with Eunyu.

"Why... do you care?" Hyunsu whispers sluggishly, a death rattle reverberating through his chest with each word and the tiny hairs stand immediately on end along Eunhyuk's forearms at the disturbing sound. "Go away. I promise. I'll be as good as new for the next run."

Hyunsu's voice is thick, perhaps with tears or perhaps with blood that might be pooling in his lungs. 

Eunhyuk pushes his glasses up his nose with an index finger, critically cataloguing Hyunsu's condition, pulling various textbook diagnoses from memory to try identify whether something might match the mess of a human he has sitting in front of him.

"What? Do you have a death wish?" Eunhyuk taunts then flatly to get some kind of rise out of Hyunsu to gain understanding of his current state. It's hard to tell when his default personality is... well, a wet blanket. "The next supply run is hardly relevant right now. I want to make sure that you are alright. You're important to our group. Everyone's survival depends on y—"

Eunhyuk breaks off to inhale when he feels oxygen shrink inside the room, Hyunsu's huddling form shrinking along with it, and then tries a little gentler, "We don't know how this whole golden hour thing works. All we know for sure is that infectees have potent healing abilities during this time frame, but they're not impossible to kill, since it's the last outpost before they turn into full fledged monsters. This means that you can still die, we just don't know when or how it even works. Do you get it? You can't be constantly rushing into things. If something happens to you..." Eunhyuk trails off, letting the silence speak for itself.

Hyunsu huffs wetly into the circle of his arms, hunched back stuttering with each wheezing breath. He fidgets in his man-made cocoon for a few seconds that seem to stretch into infinity but then finally looks up from in between his messy bangs with a certain air of stubborn determination, eyes hard and with a reply on the tip of his tongue.

There's an apprehensive flutter in Eunhyuk's stomach and for half a second he expects to get flipped off, and in sign language of all.

However, Hyunsu freezes up unnaturally before he can even get a sound out, shock rippling across his pale face. He makes a strangled noise, his huge eyes bulging out of their sockets just as all of his joints lock up and his shoulders start to shake uncontrollably, rapidly turning into violent, full body spasms. The loud rattle of his teeth bounces ominously around the walls.

Eunhyuk makes a stifled noise, sitting fully upright in alarm, feet shuffling against the floor as he crowds closer, hands fluttering indecisively in the air around Hyunsu. He doesn't know what to do, hasn't ever seen anything like this before.

But before he manages to make sense of things, Hyunsu's eyes roll back into his skull and he throws his head back, smacking it straight into the wall behind him, causing the cracks in the dried out paint to deepen — run higher up the wall. A strange, gurgling sound comes out of Hyunsu then, lodged deep within his chest, followed by a squelch and a pop of viscous bubbles when a blob of thick, slimy blood wells up between his lips. It dribbles sluggishly past the swell of his lips and then down his chin, making its way down his wiry, stretched out throat in glistening rivulets.

Hyunsu gasps, chest heaving and then gulps helplessly, the knot in his throat bobbing as he tries to swallow down whatever's left of the blood in his mouth. Fuck. One of his broken ribs must've punctured a lung.

"Shit. You're bleeding." Eunhyuk grabs blindly after the plastic box with first aid supplies somewhere next to him on the cot, reaching for Hyunsu with his other. "Where does it hurt? Cha Hyunsu?"

Hyunsu only makes a wet gurgling noise, blinking back stinging tears as he clamps a trembling hand over his slick mouth, covering his blood-stained teeth. His terrified eyes slide shakily sideways, landing on Eunhyuk where he flounders around — unusually panicked. Hyunsu can't decide whether to fold over and disgracefully cough up half a lung right there in front of this four-eyed devil or just bear with it and swallow down the wet, lukewarm blood that keeps rising to the back of his throat, pooling on the flat of his tongue, flooding his mouth with a tangy taste of iron. Now that the healing process has kicked in, his body is viciously rejecting, pushing out all excess fluid that has accumulated from the internal damage to his organs. 

However, it doesn't take long for the rejected blood to rise up to his nasal cavity and for Hyunsu to start choking on his very own bodily fluid, slimy blood dripping from his aching nose as well, closing all possible paths for air. His head begins to spin madly, nauseatingly, when the lack of oxygen finally gets to him and at this point Hyunsu purely blanks out, his vision reduced to twirling pinpricks of white as he keels over sideways, straight into Eunhyuk's arms.

For a while, there's nothing but the overwhelmingly loud pounding of his heart inside his ears and the stinging burn within his swelling chest as he gags and coughs relentlessly, spewing blood all over himself, fat drops of red with dark, slimy chunks of something splattering onto the floor and on Eunhyuk's sneakers, on his clothes, making a complete mess out of everything.

Hyunsu isn't sure how much time has passed when he feels a steady hand rubbing his back in soothing circles and then a cool palm pressing briefly against the sweaty column of his neck, where he sits slumped against Eunhyuk's side — who had for some reason decided to stay with him through the whole gruesome episode. At least Hyunsu didn't have his skull bashed in this time or any of his other bones sticking out inconveniently. Seeing blood however, in one way or another, wasn't as groundbreaking anymore.

"Cha Hyunsu? Are you awake?"

Feeling movement against the cradle of his shoulder — when Hyunsu drowsily rubs his forehead against him — Eunhyuk turns inwards and carefully cups the side of Hyunsu's clammy face, nudging it upwards from the guise of shadows to inspect his current state, to make sure that Hyunsu is back with him. Their eyes lock in the gloom. There's clotted blood on Hyunsu's chin, full lips smeared with dark red. Hyunsu's irises are wholly black, glinting like two pools of fresh ink, pulling Eunhyuk in.

With tresses of mattered hair curling wildly around his ashen face and dark strands sticking to his sweaty forehead, Hyunsu looks thoroughly wrecked, completely defeated by this world, by his own infected body, by the monsters inside and outside.

Eunhyuk's lips tighten into a harsh line, a strange caricature of a reassuring smile that pulls strangely at the lines around his mouth. Trying not to alarm Hyunsu, he slowly raises his free hand to swipe a cotton pad across Hyunsu's lower face, across his pliant lips and chin, carefully wiping the worst of the blood away. Once he's done, he throws the soiled pad away but leaves his other hand on Hyunsu's cheek, thumb swiping along the thin, grayish skin under his eye, looking at the strange half-human before him — who just might outlive them all. But at what cost? Can he even make it alone?

Eunhyuk's resolve softens. Hyunsu should survive. For all of them. He's the only one who can.

There's a flicker of something alive within Eunhyuk's dead-eyed stare, beyond the blood-splattered lenses of his glasses, that sends a spike of adrenaline through Hyunsu's veins, lighting up his brain. 

Eunhyuk had stayed. He stayed when everyone else had left. 

And while everyone usually stare at him with fright and resentment clear in their eyes, Eunhyuk simply just looks at Hyunsu, always with a faint frown like he has machines running analyses on everything inside his mind — the way he looks pretty much at anything and anyone. Eunhyuk might not be the most forthcoming or sociable, but he doesn't treat Hyunsu any different from the other Green Home residents.

Is this what you want? The monster whispers against his ear, sitting on Hyunsu's other side, grinning widely from ear to ear, white teeth shining in the midnight gloom.

Hyunsu blinks, body twitching. His bony fingers dig into Eunhyuk's thigh, dirty nails scraping across the coarse fabric of his jeans — drenched in Hyunsu's own blood. Something twists deep inside of him. A need. Hyunsu subconsciously tilts his chin upwards, a faint nudge against his mind that he can't control.

In turn, Eunhyuk's keen eyes rake beseechingly across Hyunsu's vulnerable expression in the poignant silence that for a precious moment shields them from the rest of the world — a fragile dream within a nightmare. A heartbeat passes between them and then Eunhyuk ducks down, squishing Hyunsu's soft cheek in the curve of his palm to hold him still, and lightly presses his mouth against Hyunsu's slick lips that taste of iron. A ghost of a kiss. A consolation prize. 

Hyunsu doesn't even have the time to close his eyes, nor feel repulsed by it. Too shocked that it even happened at all. He doesn't know what he really was asking for, when he tipped his head up. The monster giggles obnoxiously next to him.

Unfortunately, neither of them get to linger in the moment when a mad jingle of bells erupts from the main entrance hall, followed by several shouts and they jolt apart from each other, eyes wild in the dark, instantly on alert for the next threat that might be jeopardizing the safety of their home.

Hyunsu springs to his feet, shoulders hunched, already clutching at his electric spear with both of his hands while expectantly glancing over at Eunhyuk with his pitch-black eyes, waiting for him to take the lead. Eunhyuk adjusts his glasses as he stands up and carefully doesn't comment how Hyunsu forgot to wear his slippers as they make their way to the main hall, the fabric of his socks softening his footsteps. 

Once the imminent danger is out of the way without any serious causalities, they never circle back to talk about the kiss. Of what use would it be? There's no time for such feeble things when merely staying alive, being able to wake up the very next day, is already a novelty. Nonetheless, Eunhyuk always makes sure to be on watch in the camera room whenever Hyunsu goes off on supply runs thereafter, keenly following his progress from across the wall of flickering silver screens.

<< previous part | next part TBC

Another Life (part 5)

Sweet Home FF | Hyunsu x Eunhyuk

Hyunsu doesn't understand what's going on, doesn't understand the sick feeling twisting in his gut, the strange thundering of his heart that resonates through his whole body like a shockwave. The monster stirs finally inside of him, dark and smooth, rearing its ugly head. And for a little while Hyunsu doesn't even remember where he is, eyes glazing over.

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Wet snowflakes whirl through the cold air, finding their way inside of the collapsing structure of Green Home apartments. Everyone has already fled the building through the underground tunnel. It's just Hyunsu there, clothes in tatters, body and mind shattered, standing barefoot under the damaged alcove of the first floor entrance, right where the reinforced truck had rammed straight into the building.

Unfazed by the blasts of military fire, igniting with bright flares somewhere far off in the murky distance, Hyunsu stares blankly at Yeongsu's pink fleece scarf wrapped around his arm. It's a gentle reminder to keep himself warm, but he's cold. And alone. Exactly what he's always wished to be; for everyone to just disappear and stop tormenting him.

Even so, he never meant for his intrusive thoughts to become everyone's reality. 

Was it his fault — all of this too? This strange apocalypse? 

After all, so many people have already died as a result of Hyunsu's incompetence. He'd been too late to save Jaeheon and the one to let Uimyeong in. He'd killed Han Dusik with his bare hands. How many more would have to die because of him? Maybe Hyunsu should've jumped off a bridge, just like Kim Dohun edged him to, plunging straight into ice-cold water, letting the harsh streams rip his body apart, before any of this could even begin. If he hadn't been such a coward, maybe then his family would still be alive. If only he hadn't foolishly hoped for something to change; for his cowardly friends to grow a backbone or perhaps his parents to see past their own selfish greed, past their superficial fear of not being able to live up to the social norms. If only he could — but he couldn't. 

It's unfair. 

What had he done that was so wrong? Why was he worth less ? Why did he have to stay silent and just take it?

Why couldn't he just kill them all?

It that what you want?

Dazed, Hyunsu still manages to catch movement out of the corner of his eye and his messy head turns sluggishly around, shoulders curled inward, legs tense. It's hard to tell what's real and what's merely the demon lurking inside his head when the cacophony of wicked whispers intensify into a surging roar, bleeding straight into his thoughts and clogging everything with KILL! KILL! KILL!

His right hand curls into a tight fist, nails digging into his palm. He can feel his skin bristling and bubbling, splitting apart along the length of his forearm as shards start to push through the scar, an agonizing burn forming at the base of his spine all the while his body fights against the unnatural change. Whether Hyunsu wants it or not, his body is ready to fight, to smash, to throw the impending threat around.

His teeth ache, so he clenches harder.

But it's just Eunhyuk, dirty jeans and red flannel. A shard of light splinters from the bright military beams outside and skitters with a harsh glint across his glasses, briefly shielding Eunhyuk's eyes from view. As the leader of their ragtag team of residents, reduced to nothing but mere scraps in the span of a few hours, he still manages to stand tall and unyielding like a warrior amongst the surrounding rubble, thin lips pressed into a tight line.

Keeping his intense gaze on Hyunsu, Eunhyuk takes a wary step in his direction, all the while yanking on the thin wire connected to his earbuds, ripping both pieces of plastic from his ears when the shrieking signal reaches an unbearable volume, piercing through his brain.

And somehow, seeing a familiar face amidst the ruins of their home, no matter how ambiguous their relationship has been, makes Hyunsu's whole world turn on its axis, rewinding everything that's ever happened. The voices stop. His knees buckle as he begins to crash like a deadweight to the ground, but Eunhyuk is there to catch him.

They both stagger to the side as Eunhyuk gathers Hyunsu's gangly limbs into his arms and holds him in a bone-crushing grip; an arm around his crumbling waist and a surprisingly steady hand fisted into his greasy hair. Slightly taller, Hyunsu folds easily around him, putting full weight of his uncoordinated limbs onto Eunhyuk.

It feels familiar, Hyunsu notes vaguely from within the crook of Eunhyuk's neck. Yet he hasn't been in such close proximity — that didn't entail killing one another — with anyone in weeks, months, maybe even years. Not even his mother hugged him like this. Hyunsu's heart misses a beat at this particular thought, followed by a pang of sharp pain through his chest when a sea of white chrysanthemums flashes through his mind — identical black stripes running across three picture frames.

Thankfully, he doesn't get much time to linger in those awful memories when a powerful explosion shakes whatever's left of Green Home apartments with renewed force. Eunhyuk swiftly ducks his head with a muffled swear word but he doesn't stop clutching tightly at Hyunsu, tugging him even closer with a harsh grip on his neck to keep him safe, Eunhyuk's palm sticky with sweat and grime against Hyunsu's skin. The bearing walls groan alarmingly as more debris rains over them with big chunks of cement blocks and plaster clattering to the ground, peppering their hair with flecks of white, forcing both of them to inhale a mixture of smoke and cement dust that whirls over heir heads in hazy billows. 

Huynsu's chest wheezes with each agonizing breath. He can feel Eunhyuk's ribcage stutter alarmingly as well and it sends a spike of irrational worry through him; Eunhyk is human. He can't die. Not yet. Not like this. Hyunsu grinds his teeth to hold back the ripping wail that suddenly wants to crawl up his throat, and clings only tighter to Eunhyuk instead.

Maybe if he could just get control over his wing? Then he'd be able to shield them both from death and destruction.

"I repeat, you're all surrounded," an autonomous voice booms from the outside, cruelly invading their space. "Surrender the infected and we will spare your lives!"

A helicopter whirs far too close by the gaping hole in the wall, the loud noise scattering across the ruins of Green Home. A beam of bright light swipes against the bare walls in search of them.

Hyunsu panics, pushed into a corner like some wild animal without an actual choice of his own, his whole body starts to spasm in Eunhyuk's arms. His right arm twitches, flesh ripping apart and knotting back together as he fights the rampaging monster inside of him. It's like a rabid dog, trying to tear itself off its leash, scrambling madly for the front of Hyunsu's mind, set on taking control.

Let me out, the monster demands. Let me out so I can KILL everyone, and then you'll be free... don't you want that?

Don't you want that, Hyunsu?

Hyunsu can't control it when his head snaps back, lips already parted, eyes glazing over into pure darkness.

But then Eunhyuk's low whisper cuts through the chaos inside his head as he traps Hyunsu's trashing body within the circle of his arms.

"You're okay. Everything will be alright," he soothes.

Those words are an obvious lie, yet Hyunsu can't help the gasping breath that suddenly finds its way down and then back up again from the very depths of his chest. The tormenting storm settles inside of him. Everything feels suddenly clearer, quieter. And with the decrepit sense of relief come the hot tears, rapidly welling up in his eyes, causing his vision to blur. He can't help it. His sanity is nothing but a thin, silver thread struggling in the wind.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles as he crumbles, voice thick with tears. "I'm sorry."

Eunhyuk is the only one to ever look at him like a real person; someone to depend on rather than an inconvenience, even now, when Hyunsu could so easily hurt him.

Hyunsu squeezes closer with a wet sob, burrowing his damp face even deeper into Eunhyuk's shoulder, hiding from whatever's out there. The military. The monsters. An unknown future. A life without Eunhyuk. Death. He trembling fingers clutch at the stiff, unwashed fabric of Eunhyuk's shirt as he clings to him, finding home in the curve of his neck, breathing in Eunhyuk's comforting scent of sweat and musk and something so purely human, so alive. It sets his insides on fire, pooling like liquid gold in the pit of his stomach... but for what purpose?

Hyunsu knows that he eventually — soon — now has to leave, give himself up for the sake of this decaying world, to at least save the others. Save Eunhyuk and Eunyu.

He was planning to die anyway, had even set a date for it.

With all things considered, he was already a dead man walking.

Yet, he yearns for someone to save him, to reach a hand out through the dense darkness and whisk him away from this nightmare. Even back then, when they held him down and punched and kicked him over and over again during recess, or when they poured dirty mop water over his head in the school bathrooms, he wished that someone would say something — anything. Take his side, make him feel human and not like an abomination, like he deserved to be treated like that to repent for whatever crimes he's committed.

And Eunhyuk did. It might not have come from a good place initially but he still took a gamble and placed his life in Hyunsu's hands. He'd seen Hyunsu as an equal, as someone capable enough to trust in times of need, when his own family never even tried.

This belief sparks a strange desire inside of Hyunsu.

Something vile and shiny crawls in under his skin and stays there, simmering under the surface.

In the end, he pulls away, forlornly watching Eunhyuk's arms fall back to his sides, which causes a puff of dust rise into the air from his clothes. Hyunsu wipes awkwardly at the dampness clouding his eyes with the heel of his hand, making an even worse mess out of his dirty face than before, and then carefully unwinds Yeongsu's scarf from around his right arm. He doesn't want to ruin it, although it's pretty much soiled with of blood already.

"I should've given it back," he whispers, voice hoarse, as he presses the soft fabric into Eunhyuk's hand, fingers eerily cold when they brush against Eunhyuk's. It's just a piece of fleece but it feels like something else, something more.

Eunhyuk stares at him pensively through the cracked lenses of his glasses, but then nods once in understanding while clutching at the pink scarf. The muscles strain around his mouth and his chin quivers faintly as he holds back whatever's eating at him, clawing viciously at his insides, looking for a way out. Eunhyuk's nose stings, warming with an oncoming tickle of blood, but he holds that back too.

And perhaps there are things Eunhyuk could've done better, words he should've said, but none of that matters now. It's the end of both of them anyway. 

"It's not too late," Eunhyuk tries nonetheless, even if he doesn't believe it himself. But what would he be, if he wasn't a master at extracting himself from his personal feelings?

Huysun shakes his head sluggishly in reply, expression already vacant, mind miles away from the present. He has already made up his mind and Eunhyuk's heart sinks, shoulders dropping in disappointment. Maybe he did believe in his own lie, after all.

Hyunsu's eyes are completely black, gleaming like onyx marbles in the dark, when he strides catatonically past Eunhyuk, through the main Green Home entrance and finally steps out into the illuminating snow, where the biting wind instantly tugs and bats at the tattered scraps of his clothes. Where Eunhyuk can hear shots being fired.

Retrospectively, it never even occurred to Hyunsu that Eunhyuk wasn't planning on leaving together with the rest of the Green Home survivors.

<< previous part | next part TBC

Chapter 2

Title: Shelter in the Darkness

Chapter 2: Cracks in the World

Y/N’s POV

The air in Green Home had shifted. Ever since I heard the news about the strange illness that was spreading, there was a lingering sense of fear. People in the building were talking in hushed voices, and the atmosphere felt tense—like something bad was coming.

I had only gotten to know Hyun-su a little over the past few days, but every interaction we had made me feel more connected to him. He was quiet, always thoughtful, but there was a gentleness about him that most people wouldn’t see at first glance.

That night, I couldn’t sleep. The noises outside—distant screams, strange growls—made me restless. My mind wandered to Hyun-su. Was he feeling this way too? Did he also feel the weight of something lurking in the air?

Unable to shake the feeling of unease, I decided to check on him. I left my apartment and knocked gently on his door. After a moment, the door opened, revealing Hyun-su standing there, looking a little surprised to see me.

"Hey… everything okay?" I asked softly, trying not to sound too worried, even though I felt it deep down.

He looked at me for a moment, as if weighing whether or not to say what he was really thinking. "Yeah," he said, his voice quiet. "Just… something feels off."

I nodded, stepping closer. "Yeah, I feel it too. It’s like the whole world’s falling apart."

There was a pause before he opened the door wider, silently inviting me inside. It wasn’t the first time I had been in his apartment, but there was something different about tonight. Maybe it was the uncertainty hanging in the air, or maybe it was the way Hyun-su seemed more vulnerable than usual.

Cha Hyun-su’s POV

I didn’t expect to see you at my door that night. But when you showed up, asking if I was okay, it hit me that maybe you were feeling it too—the same unease, the same fear.

You stepped into my apartment, and somehow, your presence made the suffocating silence less unbearable. It felt… safer with you around, even though I didn’t understand why.

We sat in the small living room, the distant sounds of chaos outside filling the quiet between us. You looked at me, your eyes full of concern, and for the first time, I found myself wanting to talk to someone. To you.

"Do you think it’s true?" I asked, my voice low. "What they’re saying about the sickness?"

You hesitated before answering. "I don’t know. But whatever’s happening, it’s not good. People are scared."

Scared. That word echoed in my mind. I had spent so much time feeling numb that I had forgotten what fear really felt like. But now, it was creeping back in—especially with you sitting so close, the thought of something happening to you making my chest tighten.

"I’m scared too," I admitted, surprising even myself with the confession.

You looked at me, your expression softening. "You’re not alone, you know. We’re all in this together."

Those words hit me harder than I expected. I wasn’t used to people telling me that. I wasn’t used to the idea of not being alone.

Before I could respond, a loud bang echoed from outside, followed by the unmistakable sound of something heavy moving through the hallway. My heart raced as I stood up, moving toward the door.

You followed close behind, your hand brushing against mine briefly, sending a jolt through me. "What was that?" you whispered, your voice shaky.

I didn’t know, but I couldn’t let you be in danger. I reached for the door handle, glancing at you. "Stay close to me."

Y/N’s POV

Hyun-su’s words caught me off guard, but I nodded, staying close as we cautiously stepped into the hallway. The tension was thick in the air, and every sound felt magnified.

The moment we stepped outside, I saw it—a creature, twisted and monstrous, moving down the hall. My breath caught in my throat as I grabbed Hyun-su’s arm, my heart pounding in fear.

He was calm, even though I could see the worry in his eyes. He didn’t panic, and somehow that helped me stay grounded. "We need to get back inside," he whispered, gently pulling me away from the door.

But before we could retreat, the monster turned, its grotesque face locking onto us. I froze in place, terror gripping me, but Hyun-su didn’t hesitate. He pulled me behind him, shielding me with his body.

"Run!" he shouted, his voice filled with urgency.

We sprinted back into his apartment, slamming the door shut just as the monster lunged. I collapsed against the wall, my chest heaving, fear still coursing through me.

Hyun-su stood there, his back pressed against the door, his face pale but determined. "Are you okay?" he asked, his voice steady despite everything that had just happened.

I nodded, though my whole body was shaking. "I’m fine," I managed to say, even though my heart was still racing. "Thanks… for protecting me."

He didn’t say anything, but the look in his eyes told me everything. He was scared too, but he wasn’t going to let anything happen to me. And that realization hit me harder than any fear of the monsters outside.

Cha Hyun-su’s POV

I couldn’t stop thinking about the way you looked at me after we escaped from the monster. You were terrified, but you still managed to thank me. As if I had done something brave.

But I didn’t feel brave. I was scared—more scared than I had been in a long time. Not just because of the monsters outside, but because of the way you made me feel. You trusted me. You looked to me for protection. And that responsibility weighed heavily on me.

I sat down next to you, my heart still racing from the encounter. "We can’t stay here," I said quietly, glancing toward the door. "It’s not safe."

You nodded, your eyes filled with worry. "Where can we go?"

"I don’t know yet," I admitted. "But we’ll figure it out."

For a moment, there was silence between us, and then, to my surprise, you reached out and took my hand. Your touch was warm, grounding me in a way I hadn’t expected.

"Whatever happens," you said softly, "we’ll face it together. You don’t have to do this alone, Hyun-su."

Your words hit me hard, breaking through the wall I had built around myself. I didn’t respond, but I squeezed your hand gently, holding onto that small piece of comfort you were offering.

For the first time in a long time, I felt like maybe, just maybe, I didn’t have to face this darkness alone.

Y/N’s POV

I didn’t know what tomorrow would bring. The world outside was crumbling, monsters were lurking around every corner, and the fear in Green Home was palpable. But sitting here with Hyun-su, holding his hand, I felt something I hadn’t felt in a long time—hope.

It wasn’t just that he had protected me. It was the way he made me feel safe, even in the midst of all this chaos. There was something about Hyun-su that drew me in, something that made me want to stay by his side no matter what happened next.

"We’ll be okay," I whispered, more to reassure myself than anything.

Hyun-su didn’t reply, but the way he looked at me told me he believed it too, even if just for a moment.

In that moment, it didn’t matter how dark the world outside was. As long as we had each other, I knew we’d find a way to survive.

End of Chapter 2

Next | Previous

Another Life (part 4)

Sweet Home FF | Hyunsu x Eunhyuk

"Are you sure? It sounds more like you're just jealous because you don't get any attention from either of us. Why don't you stop acting like a petulant child and accept Hyunsu, the way he's let you in?" Eunhyuk challenges as he takes a forceful step forward right into the monster's personal space, past the long feathers that claw at his clothes and into the curve of his bristling wing where the spikes are smaller, sharper, more lethal. Where the scorching air is hard to breathe, coating the depths of his barren soul.

.

.

.

Puzzled, the monster falters, debris crunching under his heel as he backs up half a step, but then goes deadly still when Eunhyuk doesn't stop until he's right in his face. The wing hums, spikes snapping restlessly and as swiftly as Hyunsu had been pulled back to the recess of his mind, the electric blue bleeds from his eyes, leaving pools of deep brown staring back at Eunhyuk.

Hyunsu blinks sluggishly. "I— He— Don't listen to any of that," he mumbles, neck prickling with a hot flush. "It's pure nonsense."

"Yes, I know. " Eunhyuk agrees easily, too easily, keen eyes strained on the bristling spikes sprouting from the curve of Hyunsu's shoulder and asks instead, "Your wing—? Can I touch it?"

Put on the spot, Hyunsu stares wide-eyed at Eunhyuk for a few stilted heartbeats, lips parted as he breathes through his mouth, but then he clamps his teeth shut and nods, side-eying Eunhyuk warily.

"Just don't hurt yourself," Hyunsu murmurs, shrinking a little into himself self-consciously, although the oversized sweater does nothing to hide his broad frame.

Eunhyuk's lips curve faintly. "I won't," he says while reaching for him.

Hyunsu watches then with bewildered interest how Eunhyuk places a hand on the slope of his shoulder where his warm, supple skin morphs into hard, fiery shards — nothing but a grotesque imitation of feathers. The thick base of the wing stems from the top of his spine, an extension of crooked, birdlike bones and twisted knots that split and branch out into the dip where his arm otherwise should've been.

"Does it hurt?" Eunhyuk asks, mouth working faster than his brain.

Hyunsu shrugs feebly in lieu of a reply, averting his gaze to the side. It's not like he can do anything about it, not when it's a wound that will never heal. The whole damn world might change, turning completely on its end. He might change, turn into a bloodthirsty monster, but his ugly past will always remain the same. It will always be there, looming grimly over his shoulder. He’d killed his family.

"Mostly when I take it out," Hyunsu decides to add quietly nonetheless. "It's uncomfortable, as if I have dislocated my shoulder, but the bigger it gets the more it feels like my whole arm is being ripped off, and after that it's just... " He glances at the wing with a tiny frown. "...heavy."

Eunhyuk hums in response as he carefully, almost painstakingly slow, slopes his palm down along the uneven ridges, cataloging the feeling of the hot, coarse surface under his fingertips. Unsurprisingly, he ends up cutting himself on the razor-sharp edges, hand jerking at the faint twinge of pain, mind too preoccupied with the captivating monstrosity before him to reel in the autonomous reaction. 

Hyunsu makes a distressed noise. His heart pounds hard against his chest, eyes brimming with anguish the instant he catches sight of bright red spreading rapidly along the creases of Eunhyuk's palm.

He draws in air with a wheeze into his lungs and makes an onset to pull away, eyes flickering between brown and blue. "I warned you—" He stresses.

"Stay," Eunhyuk cuts him off, before Hyusu gets too far away. His other hand shoots out, fingers curling around Hyunsu's biceps, holding him in place with inhuman strength, reminding Hyunsu that he's no longer a fragile human. That this is a different time. Another them. He doesn't have to worry about hurting him. "Please stay. I have something to say."

And Hyunsu stills, stray pieces of rubble crunching under his shoes. His body goes rigid, broad shoulders tense like a bowstring. Unease slithers through his lower stomach. He doesn't know what to expect.

Eunhyuk keeps his gaze downcast, brows knit as he absently follows a stray drop of blood on its descend as it drips from his palm and with a hiss, sizzles against Hyunsu's spikes. The tacky, coppery scent clogs his senses for a short moment while he collects his thoughts. The words swell in his throat, filling his mouth, sitting heavy on his tongue. He should've said this a long time ago.

"I don't expect any forgiveness," Eunhyuk starts, voice even, controlled. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry." He inhales deeply and glances up at Hyunsu. "I'm sorry for being a part of everything shitty in this world that made you like this."

"What?" Hyunsu's full lips fall apart, eyebrows arching outwards in bewilderment, inching beneath his wild bangs. His gaze searches across Eunhyuk's smooth face, trying to comprehend the meaning beyond the actual words.

"I'm sorry for exploiting your weakness," Eunhyuk continues as he steps closer, staring intensely at Hyunsu, bringing them chest to chest. Hyunsu can feel him exhale with each breath, the fabric of Eunhyuk’s windbreaker rustling faintly. "Back then, we could all see how sad and isolated you were, on the brink of self-destruction, and we used it. We used your wish to die for something we believed was a greater good."

Hyunsu grows quiet, too still, barely breathing as he tries to take it all in — he really does. He hears the words, can see Enuhyuk's mouth moving but as if submerged under water, he can't understand them. Won't understand them.

Eunhyuk's grip on Hyunsu's wing tightens, spikes digging into his skin and more blood oozes out of his wound, causing rancid steam that stinks of burned flesh rise into the air. Eunhyuk isn't the one to rant senselessly like this but he can't help it. The stony silence chokes him, so the words keep pouring out of him.

"We— I was desperate. It was the end of the world and I did what I thought was best for everyone. You. Me. Eunyu. Shit, I made so many poor choices." Eunhyuk's low voice gains a raw edge as his gaze chases pleadingly across Hyunsu's detached expression. It's important that he understands. That he knows. "But I don't regret any of it, not when the three of us are still alive. I'm just sorry you had to go through all of that before you could stand here. And if that's the reason your monster hates me... I get it. I do. But I hope I'm not too late."

Huynsu blinks slowly, eyes dark and Eunhyuk can't help pressing it, "Am I?" His fingers dig into Hyunsu's left arm.

Being numb was safe, but there's something about Hyunsu's quiet, looming presence that never fails to uproot every fiber of his being. Then and now.

"I don't know," Hyunsu says quietly. "But I don't hate you."

A gaping hole opens up in the middle of Eunhyuk's chest at these words, a vortex that might suck everything in. He wants to crush him, to devour him whole, to fill the empty space with Hyunsu right where all of his emotions and human heart should be. He wants to hide him way in the cavity, to keep him safe. He wants the whole world to know how good Hyunsu is. He wants no one else to ever lay their eyes on his gentle smile that he shows so rarely. He wants to—

Eunhyuk draws close to Hyunsu's face, noses touching softly. His steadfast gaze bores down to the very center of Hyunsu's infected core and something ugly wiggles in the squishy, tar-like darkness in response. Hyunsu doesn't know what to do — whether to fight or to hide, or maybe give in. Even with the intent unmistakable in Eunhyuk's gaze when he so easily closes the distance, leans in and slots their lips together, Hyunsu still doesn't know what to do. He grabs desperately at straws but the monster is silent.

The kiss starts off smooth and soft, like balm, despite the awkward angles of their clashing bodies, a little humid where their lips part and breaths mingle. Warmth licks at Eunhyuk's cool insides, melting them to slush. He lets go of Hyunsu's restless wing to cradle possessively at the curve of his face instead, his palm sticky with blood. Eunhyuk’s thumb presses into the soft underside of Hyunsu's firm jaw, singed fingertips plunging into the choppy hair at the base of his neck to draw Hyunsu even closer, pressing them flush against each together, knees bumping. He's anxious for more, blunt teeth grazing at the soft flesh of Hyunsu's lower lip. 

Despite his earlier words, Eunhyuk wants to taste forgiveness on his tongue. He wants to believe the fact that Hyunsu is still there — with him, with Eunyu — might actually mean something more than mere loneliness.

However, Eunhyuk's heart sinks and he has to recalibrate his actions when there's no immediate response. His other hand tightens around Hyunsu's tense biceps in reflex, as if he might evaporate straight into thin air if Eunhyuk doesn't hold onto him hard enough. A patchy, passing cloud veils the sun briefly, casting everything in gray shadow and in that moment a smatter of automatic gunfire fills his head, along with images of a bloodied figure staggering through the snow.

He's already lost Hyunsu once. Eunhyuk can't let it happen again.

Hyunsu's mind reels, locked inside his frozen-stiff body, eyes wide and lips slack against Eunhyuk's demanding mouth. His deformed wing trembles, losing its shape when the shards start to retract back into his skin with a wet squelch. His flesh melts and reconnects again, morphing into a pale arm with far too many fingers on his hand until they're five again, hanging uselessly at his side. 

Hyunsu doesn't understand what's going on, doesn't understand the sick feeling twisting in his gut, the strange thundering of his heart that resonates through his whole body like a shockwave. The monster stirs finally inside of him, dark and smooth, rearing its ugly head. And for a little while Hyunsu doesn't even remember where he is, eyes glazing over.

<< previous part | next part TBC

Masterlist

SWEET HOME

Another Life | Hyunsu x Eunhyuk

part 1 part 2 part 3

Another Life (part 3)

Sweet Home FF | Hyunsu x Eunhyuk

And the truth is, Hyunsu feels annoyed for having been strung along by Eunhyuk's little spiel just now, so he gives in, just a tiny bit.

.

.

.

He rolls his broad shoulders menacingly and with one practiced motion shakes out his wing. The monster hisses in relief as a cluster of bristling, heavy bones falls with a loud thud against concrete, curved and trailing several feet beyond his back, sending a blast of chunky dust through the air. The force smacks against Eunhyuk's front, ruffling through his inky hair and causes him to blink harshly against the fine debris, before he manages to restore his blank expression.

Seems like Hyunsu finally got fed up with him. Eunhyuk's lips twitch faintly.

"Careful. Don't be too fast to jump to conclusions," the not-quite-Hyunsu warms with a crooked grin as he turns around and starts dragging the heavy thing behind him when he stalks forward, closing in on Eunhyuk, gaze bright and unyielding, a little feverish.

There are loud cracks and snaps among the vibrating bones — blades — feathers. A low hum that never ceases.

"I still want to kill you. Don't think I'll spare you just because you've been following Cha Hyunsu around like a goody-two-shoes. You're still a manipulative rat, even if you won't die as easily anymore."

The monster cocks his head to the side, the motion too sharp to be human, squinting at Eunhyuk. His dark eyes glimmer with a sheen of electric blue, brighter than the sky.

"Now, why don't you ask the question that you really want the answer to?"

Eunhyuk's expression doesn't betray any of his thoughts. With his hands still stuffed in the front pockets of his jacket, he merely tilts his head thoughtfully and hums low in his throat, keen eyes staring appraisingly at the macabre imitation of a wing attached to Hyunsu's human body.

It wouldn't be the first time. Eunhyuk always looks. Dissecting. Fascinated by the fact how a scrawny teenager has managed to overcome his fears and grow into such a fierce protector. He accomplished something that even a once human Eunhyuk, with his many years of meticulous studying and number of prized awards and scholarships, could never achieve. And perhaps, Hyunsu was already more compassionate than many of the apartment residents could ever be when the gruesome infection first broke out. The monsterization might be a way to bring forth people's true nature, but the real monsters have always been there, hiding amongst them.

So each time Eunhyuk sees Hyunsu like this — teetering on the edge of his humanity, bearing the weight of everyone's agony like some martyr, trying to help all of these foolish, selfish people — it sends an apprehensive chill down his back. Because he's the last one left of them; the Green Home survivors. It's special. It has Eunhyuk's lungs in a harsh pinch whenever he's unable to confirm with his own eyes that Hyunsu hasn't completely lost himself to the disease of human desire. That he can still be a little awkward, soft spoken and sometimes a bit too shameless, but most of all stupidly stubborn and unexpectedly kind, to the point of sacrificing himself for the sake of others.

Sadly, the only one Hyunsu doesn't care about is himself. 

He's always ready to die, to slink away like a sick animal when no one watches.

Sometimes Eunhyuk wishes that he could just give Hyunsu a good shake, and then take his pain away, scrub the blood off his scarred hands to give him a clean slate. A new home. A different life.

But then Eunhyuk lets the numbness take over, feeling its cool fingers tickle over his rigid mind, erasing the taste of charcoal on his tongue and nothing of this truly matters.

Eunhyuk adjusts his stance to better face Hyunsu's looming form, legs apart and shoulders at ease under his puffy windbreaker jacket. He's not looking to pick a fight, but Hyunsu's monster always makes a fairly good attempt at worming his way in under his skin.

"Thanks, and you're just as annoying as ever, but don't worry, I'll take all of that as a compliment. Doesn't it hurt to bring it out, though?" Eunhyuk asks with a glance at the wing, disregarding the rest of the monster's provoking spiel. "Just because you can, doesn't really mean you should. You'll be completely useless if you tire yourself out before we even get started. Didn't you want to check if there's any monsters worth bringing back to their human state in this area?"

Eunhyuk nudges his head pointedly in the direction of the overgrown forest, looming beyond the road dotted with overturned cars and the abandoned ruins of the suburbs they've chosen as their temporary holdout.

Hyunsu's deadly feathers bristle for being told off, immediately standing on end. The whispers grow louder, dripping with saccharine venom, coating his mind with oozing blackness. Let me take full control... Let me teach him a lesson... Together we're much stronger than him. He can't keep us trapped anymore. Imagine the wonderful screams splitting from his lips as we rip his chest apart and crush his breastbone into pieces. The bones in his wing rattle menacingly against each other like planks of wood, like loose teeth. The closer Hyunsu draws, the more he manages to tower over Eunhyuk, casting a shadow over his face. He smells of raging fire, like an inferno, full of sulfur and ash, and Eunhyuk tries not to choke on it.

Hyunsu's eyes have been reduced to two pinpricks of icy blue at this rate and that's how Eunhyuk definitely knows he's lost Hyunsu to the monster — for now. It never lasts long. Hyunsu is strong.

"What's this? I didn't know you cared that much about your little hunting dog. Have you been practicing how to get into touch with your emotions again? Uprooting useless memories?" The monster drawls with an arrogant tilt to his chin, upper lip curling disdainfully. "You know, it's rude to give false hope. You're not exactly in any state to run a charity."

He drags his wing closer to his body with a loud scrape against concrete as he speaks, unsettling a few birds that immediately take flight across the sky. The well-defined muscles in his shoulder strain under the scraps of his shredded sweater, working overtime as he raises the cumbersome thing and hurls it into the air. Eunhyuk doesn't move out of the way and if the monster is surprised by that, he doesn't show it. The cluster of singed spikes and bones sprout with loud squelches, reaching even further as they curve and fold around Eunhyuk's frame with reverberating creaks and snaps, cutting him off from the rest of the world. 

Eunhyuk looks on with disinterest at the way the giant wing trembles with restraint around him. The monster is visibly impatient to crush him to a pulp, to push the vibrating blades into his flesh and destroy the source for Hyunsu's strength. 

Yet, he doesn't, just forces Eunhyuk to hold still and be at his mercy within the deadly cradle of his wing.

Eunhyuk doesn't mind. He knows that Hyunsu is in there somewhere. 

And even if something does happen, then he wouldn't have it any other way. At this rate, they've seen and done too much. Dying now or later wouldn't matter.

An especially ugly spike singes way too close to Eunhyuk's left eye and a giddy leer splits Hyunsu's face apart like an ugly mask when the monster within notices with keen interest how Eunhyuk doesn't even flinch, solidly holding his ground. Perhaps merely ripping his chest apart and breaking all of his ribs wouldn't be satisfying enough. There has to be something that would make him sob and writhe disgracefully in the dirt at their feet.

"Hyunsu is not a dog," Eunhyuk states calmly, closely watching the beast before him.

"Right," the monster replies wryly, ripping his gaze away from the tiny laceration that now mars the highest point of Eunhyuk's cheek, right below his sharp eye. "I'm not sure whether I should feel insulted or grateful for your sentiment after all this time. But I bet Hyunsu will appreciate it more. He's such a simple guy," the monster shakes his head ruefully with a dramatic sigh, dark locks of hair fluttering around his face. "Give him a hand and he'll happily take the whole arm. He's quite laughable, really. Clinging to you two like some lovesick puppy..." He chuckles, glancing down. "Even I can't stand him sometimes, and we share the same space. How pathetic."

"There's nothing wrong with wanting to stay alive," Eunhyuk supplies patiently, not allowing the monster get a rise out of him, nor to unnecessarily insult Hyunsu. "If we helped him somehow to live through this whole collective nightmare, then I'm glad. I'm sure Eunyu feels the same. Hyunsu saved our lives on many occasions, and not only us, but many other people as well. It's only right that we pay him back now. Please don't belittle him like that."

"Tch..." Hyunsu's face contorts into a grimace, lips twisting with distaste. But then the monster perks up, blue eyes shining with glee. His gaze sweeps along Eunhyuk's tall body from head to toe thoughtfully. "If paying back is what you want... then should I tell you about his desire? What he's most afraid of gaining and losing? Cha Hyunsu is a part of me, after all."

"I'd rather have Hyunsu tell me himself." 

Eunhyuk holds his ground. They have already crossed so many blurred lines, at least with this one they should perhaps go about it the right way — if there even is a right way for anything like that.

The monster pouts. "Now look who's the one not being any fun. You know, it makes me upset, the way you two always talk through me, playing your little avoidance game. And then bitch and moan about all the deaths you've caused, using that as an excuse. Well, how sad—" He giggles shrilly. "Your human lives are so tragic. Why complicate it so much?"

Eunhyuk huffs dryly but lets the monster rant, waiting for him to get it out of his system. Nowadays, he acts out mostly when Hyunsu is upset, so in a twisted way, it's Hyunsu trying to tell Eunhyuk something that he otherwise couldn't or were too shy to. 

Other times it's just the monster playing shrewd tricks on them.

"Are you done?" Eunhyuk asks cooly when there's a lapse in the monologue, subconsciously pleased to see the monster clench his jaw and look away, for once having no snide comeback. "I take that as a yes. So, what is that you want me to do? Never mind Hyunsu."

"I want you gone and out of Hyunsu's life," the monster spits at him. The bonelike feathers tremble threateningly around Eunhyuk with repressed force, the smell of ash and sulfur spiking in the air. "Stop stringing him along. He's better off without you."

The months spent in wilderness with little Yisu have been so far the best time of their lives. There had been no sketchy schemes to use Hyunsu as a specimen for unsolicited research, no entitled humans greedily demanding his help, but at the same time turning their backs on him and trying to kill Hyunsu in a stroke of white fear when they get a glimpse of his other self. 

In the blaze of summer heat, it had been just the orange sun shining on their backs and an endless horizon stretching before them as they hand-in-hand waddled unhurriedly through the tall, wispy grass by the river bank. 

He wants that moment back.

"Are you sure? It sounds more like you're just jealous because you don't get any attention from either of us. Why don't you stop acting like a petulant child and fully accept Hyunsu, the way he's let you in?" Eunhyuk challenges as he takes a forceful step forward right into the monster's personal space, past the long feathers that claw at his clothes and into the curve of his bristling wing where the spikes are smaller, sharper, more lethal. Where the scorching air is hard to breathe, coating the depths of his barren soul.

<< previous part next part >> TBC

𓆰♡𓆪 𝓈𝓌𝑒𝑒𝓉 𝒽𝑜𝓂𝑒 ⋆₊˚.

ʚ cha hyun-su! a bud (part 1 of series | can be oneshot) blooming (part 2 of series | can be oneshot) petals allure (part 3 of series | can be oneshot) leaves flitter and fall (part 4 of series | can be oneshot) soil, sunlight, solitude (part 5 of series | can be oneshot) winds of change (archived to be edited)

𝜗𝜚 all works are written by me and i do not permit anyone to republish, copy, rewrite or translate my work (reblogs are welcomed!!) ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

copyright © 2024 thinemoonshine all rights reserved

Hi, could you do cha Hyun su x pregnant fem reader just were reader doesn’t tell Hyun su she’s pregnant in season 1 but find out after a small boy runs into the hospital lost but hears Hyun su am,Ah-yi and Eunyu voices and you come in shortly after finds him and it’s revealed after thinking she died

In the desolate corridors of the transformed Green Home, where monstrous creatures roamed freely, the I stumbled upon a discovery that would forever alter the course of my already horrible life well expect I founded out I'm pregnant with Hyun-soo child.

The revelation came with a mix of fear and hope. Fear, because bringing a child into a world overrun by abominations seemed almost cruel, and hope, because the unborn life within me held the promise of something beautiful amid the chaos.

As the days unfolded, I kept the secret guarded, grappling with the uncertainty that surrounded our survival. I couldn't bring myself to burden Hyun Soo with the news, unsure of how he would react in a world teetering on the edge of madness.

After the collapse of Green Home apartments I decided to spilt with the group without anyone knowing it definitely brought with it new challenges, but I had to protect my baby and keep my secret safe. Then, one day, a small boy, lost and frightened, stumbled into the hospital where Hyun Soo, Ah Yi, and Eunyo was. I turned my back for a second and when I looked back my little boy ran into the hospital making me ran after him fearing for our life when I didn't know what was behind those doors

Heart pounding, I raced into the hospital, only to find chaos and confusion. Hyun Soo, his protective instincts on high alert, attempted to calm the boy while Ah Yi and Eunyo watched with wide eyes. I quickly scanned the room until they locked onto the person I thought I would never see in my life agian.

Without a second thought, I rushed into the room, breathless and terrified. Hyun Soo turned to me, his eyes widening in disbelief. For a moment, it felt as if time had frozen—his gaze locked with me and looked as if he'd seen a ghost.

"I thought you were...," he began, unable to finish the sentence as a whirlwind of emotions played across his face.

"I'm here," I said, tears brimming in my eyes. "I'm alive."

The lost boy, now safely in Hyun Soo's arms, looked between the two with innocent curiosity. As the realization sank in, Hyun Soo's eyes widened further, a myriad of emotions settling in his gaze.

"Mommy!" yelled my little boy as he saw me standing there. Shocked still Hyun-soo asked "You were pregnant? But who-" "its you" thats all I said as I picked up my son looking Hyun-soo in the eyes. Alot has changed I noted.

Cha hyun soo eyes flickered to their blue color making me stare in surprise and wonder.

Why didn't you tell him you're pregnant. Oh how happy he no sorry we would be. We were so angry and sad when we couldn't find you.

Hyun-soo walking closer looking at my son in my arms then at me. Unexpectedly he pulled me into a hug. He looked at us especially our son with admiration and at me with look of love.

Don't ever leave us agian. You're ours Mine our child and no one will separate us agian or I'll kill them

The Time Will Tell Masterlist

(Picture from @ hyunsuwife on pinterest)

Cha Hyun-su x Fem!Kim!Reader

Warnings: Talk of past self harm, near suicide attempt, violence, monsters, slow-burn, angst, fluff, possible smut in future chapters. Total Word Count: 57k+

My Navigation and Masterlist

My Sweet Home Masterlist

My Cha Hyun-su Masterlist

Most would think moving back in with your parents was a weird and uncool thing to do.

You disagreed.

Moving back in with your dad meant seeing him and your two younger siblings, Kim Yeong-su and Kim Su-yeong. It also meant you were moving into an apartment complex that housed the cutest boy you'd ever seen.

After a few random encounters and then a monster apocalypse, you figure out your feelings for the boy. How will you navigate these feelings? Are they reciprocated?

Only time will tell.

Glossary

Season 1:

| Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 |

| Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 |

| Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 |

| Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 |

| Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 |

| Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 |

| Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 |

| Chapter 22 | Chapter 23 | Chapter 24 |

| Chapter 25 | Chapter 26 | Chapter 27 |

| Chapter 28 | Chapter 29 | Chapter 30 |

| Chapter 31 | Chapter 32 | Chapter 33 |

| Chapter 34 | Chapter 35 |

Season 2:

Time Will Tell - Chapter 15

My Time Will Tell Masterlist

My Cha Hyun-su Masterlist

My Navigation and Masterlist

The Time Will Tell Glossary

Warnings: Cursing, panicky feelings, the voting scene. Word Count: 1,545

prev | current | next

The papers pulled out and accounted for were placed on the table while Eun-hyuk kept track of them with the whiteboard behind him. It was down to the last two slips of paper in the box and you were getting worried, the fear and panic building up inside your stomach and threatening to take over. 

“If one of the last two ballots is in favor, he’ll be kicked out,” Eun-hyuk declared as Seok-hyeon grabbed all the slips and looked around at the residents in the room with something like betrayal. 

“Seven people opposed? Are you all crazy?” He yelled. 

“Opposed,” Eun-hyuk read off the next one he pulled out and wrote it on the board, just like he did with the others. “Eight to eight.”

“All the bitches and bastards on his side should be thrown out with him!” He screamed, looking directly at you and the three people near you: Eun-yu, Ji-su, and Jae-heon. 

“Will you calm the fuck down?” Ji-su asked him, her face curled into one of disgust. You would have said something too but your throat was closed up with your anxiety. 

“Don’t get worked up yet,” the boy keeping score placated everyone, looking at you in particular when he noticed the growing panic on your face. “The last vote here will determine the result.”

He drew the final paper from the box and you buried your head in your arms, reminding yourself to breathe.

In. 

Out. 

In. 

Out. 

In- 

“Invalid.”

You looked up as he showed the paper to everyone, revealing the circle with an X drawn through it. You didn’t know you could feel such relief but you did and let your head fall back against the pillar behind you. 

“Oh, no way!” Seok-hyeon cursed as he grabbed the paper from Eun-hyuk’s hands and turned to Byeong-il, demanding he bring Hyun-su to the room. “Bring that bastard here!”

“Y-you mean me?”

“Yeah! We need to get rid of him!”

Byeong-il looked reluctant to do it but eventually walked off to retrieve the boy. 

“Voting, my ass!” The older man yelled at the boy in the front before turning around. “Are you all crazy? Did you forget that someone just died?”

“Are you against the result?” Eun-hyuk asked rather calmly. 

“What?” Seok-hyeon asked as he turned back around to face him. “You don’t know squat. Murder is killing a human being, not killing a giant fucking monster!” He flipped the small table holding the box and papers over, it falling rather anticlimactically to the floor. 

In a moment of what you liked to call instant karma, his nose started bleeding tremendously, the first sign of monsterization. 

“This is… it’s just because I’m tired!” He tried to reason, walking towards the middle of the group while everyone backed away from him in fear. You stayed on the ground, watching the scene in slight amusement that you wouldn’t dare show on your face. The amusement faded when he stopped in front of a familiar figure donning a black hoodie. You quickly stood and looked at his face, a face you missed despite you seeing it no less than an hour ago. 

“Hyun-su…” you whispered. His eyes flickered to you but he kept his attention on the bleeding man in front of him. 

“You better brace yourself,” he warned, almost tauntingly. 

“What?” Seok-hyeon asked?

“The monsters are coming for you.”

You nearly laughed at the fury that filled Seok-hyeon’s fear-filled eyes. “You son of a bitch!”

Hyun-su moved his gaze to the box and papers scattered on the floor, walking over and kneeling down. He picked one up that already had a circle drawn on it. “Can I cast my vote?” He asked, hovering the paper with a circle above the box. 

“Hyun-su, what are you doing?” You objected, ready to walk forward and pluck the paper from his hands if it were for Eun-yu grabbing your arm and pulling you back. 

“If I put this in, he’ll be thrown out too, right?” He asked before looking directly at Eun-hyuk to make sure. You let out a light gasp when you saw his pitch-black eyes. “Am I right?”

The thud of Seok-hyeon’s body falling to the floor interrupted the staring contest between the two and everyone looked over. The blood still pouring from his nose pooled around his face and chest, staining his white shirt beyond repair.

“That’s right,” Eun-hyuk declared, drawing everyone’s attention back to him and the question asked. 

“Wait! No, no, no, we can’t just kick them out! Some of the monsters weren’t evil! I’ve seen them through the windows, how are we sure these two won’t turn into those types of monsters?” You tried to reason, looking at Eun-hyuk with your pleading eyes.

“Alright,” he compromised. “We’ll quarantine them. We’ll put them in the arcade room for now so we can keep track of them during the transition periods.”

Your face fell but your eyes held relief. You were happy that at the very least they weren’t going to be exiled out of the building, but you weren’t sure you were too fond of the idea to completely isolate them from everyone else. Your gaze moved from his to Hyun-su’s where he was already watching you. You moved over to kneel next to him. He still had the hand holding the paper hovering over the box, ready to cast his vote and make it so that he and Seok-hyeon would be quarantined. “Are you okay with that?” You asked him, your voice quiet and meant just for him. You wanted him to fully be in control of what would happen, but knowing that wouldn't happen you could at least tell him his options. 

His eyes remained on yours as he placed the paper in, casting his vote and condemning himself to nearly complete isolation from everyone else. “Yeah. As long as it keeps… everyone safe,” he said, nearly saying ‘you’ instead of ‘everyone’ but catching himself. 

You nodded reluctantly, whispering, “Okay.”

“The votes have been cast. The infected will be quarantined in the arcade room until further notice,” Eun-hyuk announced as the meeting came to a close. You stayed kneeling on the floor beside Hyun-su while a few members helped pick up Seok-hyeon and carry him over to the arcade room. 

Eventually, it was just you, Hyun-su, and Eun-hyuk in the room. “Time to go,” the bespectacled boy told him. You let out a sharp breath before standing and offering your hand to Hyun-su. He spent a few more moments than necessary just staring at your hand until finally raising his and accepting your offer. It was more for the sake of physical contact than for actually helping him up, but you appreciated it while it lasted, and you hoped he did too. Once he was standing, you slowly let go of his hand and let him walk behind Eun-hyuk as he started leading him to the arcade room. 

It didn’t take long for the three of you to get there. Seok-hyeon was placed on the only couch in the room, leaving Hyun-su the option of the floor or a raised plastic platform as his bed. You let out a sharp sigh, feeling your eyes sting but holding back the waterworks. Quickly, you took off the jacket around your waist, not caring about how the air seemed to be getting chillier over the past couple of days and only thinking about Hyun-su’s comfort. 

“Here,” you gave him the jacket. “You can use this again as a pillow. It’ll probably be more comfortable than anything else here.”

“No,” he refused with a confused shake of his head, still looking surprised by your endless acts of kindness toward him. “I can’t, you need this. What if you get cold?” 

You smiled. “If I get cold then I’ll come and ask for it back. How’s that sound? Just use it until then though, okay?” He still looked unwilling to accept it so you sweetened the deal. “Just for the nights you sleep in here. I’ll take it back in the morning, okay?”

He begrudgingly accepted, taking the rolled-up jacket from your hands with one last attempt to convince you otherwise. “But what if I get blood on it?”

You gave him a look that said ‘Really?’ “We’re living in the apocalypse now. A little blood never hurt anybody,” you teased. When he still looked hesitant, you gave a solution. “If you’re so worried about it, you can put your hood over your head to make sure it won’t get on it, but I really don’t mind if it does.”

He nodded, giving you a small genuine smile in thanks. Your own smile widened at the sight of his. It was the first time you saw it and it was honestly an adorable sight to behold. 

A call of your name from the arcade’s entrance brought both of your attention over there and you saw Eun-hyuk. “Come on. Time to go.”

You sighed, looking at Hyun-su with an apology painted over your face. “Don’t bore yourself to death in here, okay? I’ll try to bring you something to do,” you promised. He nodded and you turned, walking out with a final glance back at him before Eun-hyuk closed the door with a click. 

Time Will Tell - Chapter 14

My Time Will Tell Masterlist

My Cha Hyun-su Masterlist

My Navigation and Masterlist

The Time Will Tell Glossary

Warnings: Blood, boxcutter threat from Seok-hyeon, Seok-hyeon being an abusive little shit. Word Count: 1,863

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You sat in the chair beside the makeshift bed Hyun-su lay on, watching his chest rise and fall ever so slowly. The bed wasn’t much - consisting of your jacket as a pillow and his own as a blanket - but it was enough. 

Eun-hyuk tried to get you away from the boy but you refused, not allowing yourself to move from that chair. He allowed it reluctantly but didn’t feel safe leaving you alone with him so he sat in the corner. 

“Is he dead?” Eun-yu asked. You hadn’t even noticed her appear at the doorway with how focused you were on watching Hyun-su take in slow breaths. 

“No. He isn’t dead,” Eun-hyuk replied for you. 

“I’m going to get you some water, you don’t look so great,” he excused himself after you looked over your shoulder at the girl and saw how you looked. 

“Gee, thanks,” you said with a light laugh, deep down knowing he was probably right.

After he’d left the room, your fingers brushed the hair out of Hyun-su’s eyes before your eyes fell on the blood drying on the boy’s neck. Looking around the room, you found a box of tissues and grabbed it, taking some out and gently wiping them across the blood. You couldn’t do much damage to the blood staining his clothes but you wanted to do whatever you could to make him as comfortable as possible. It was after the third tissue was completely soiled and you grabbed a fourth that his eyes shot open. 

He whispered out your name and your eyes quickly looked over at him, finding him awake and alert. 

“You’re awake,” you exclaimed quietly, setting the tissues down and placing the back of your hand on his forehead, feeling his unusually cold body temperature. “Are you okay? Can I get you anything? You’re so cold…”

“W-what happened?” He got out, his eyes looking between yours as you stared down at him, a worried look he wasn’t sure he deserved on your face. 

“You passed out after you fell from the 9th floor,” Eun-hyuk’s voice interrupted you as you were about to talk. Your hand fell from Hyun-su’s forehead as you looked over at him. The boy nearly whined from the loss of your warm skin but you were none the wiser as Eun-hyuk spoke again. “It was the golden hour that saved you. Did you know that?”

“Eun-yu was the one who saw you when you fell. It was… terrifying,” you admitted. 

“It’s ironic though,” Eun-hyuk continued. “Golden hour used to mean it was the last hour you’re able to save someone’s life, you know?” Hyun-su looked off into the distance, unable or unwilling to reply to his comment. “Are you okay?”

He brought a hand to the back of his head, pulling it away and watching with wide eyes as it came back bloody. “Yeah, I think I’m okay.”

“Okay,” Eun-hyuk said, shooting a glance at you before persisting. “It’s going to be tough from now on.”

You walked in between the two boys as everyone gathered in the nursery. As you were wrapping the jacket you gave to Hyun-su to use as a pillow around your waist, it wasn’t hard to notice the way everyone seemed so cautious of the boy. Stumbling over each other to get away from him and whispering as they stared. You rolled your eyes at all of it, glancing over at Hyun-su every once in a while to make sure he was okay. It didn’t outwardly seem like any of it had an effect on him but you weren’t sure. 

The only one who didn’t scramble away at the first sight of him was Seok-hyeon.

“You’re all out of your mind. You brought a monster in here,” he said, moving past Eun-hyuk from where he stood in front of you and you stood in front of Hyun-su. Hyun-su almost instinctively pulled you behind him to keep you safe. “Don’t you dare turn. Got it? You crazy monster.”

The sound of a boxcutter opening filled your ears and you pushed yourself back in front of Hyun-su so you were standing between the two men. “I suggest you put that down before you get hurt,” you warned. “Because trust me,” you continued as your eyes never left Seok-hyeon’s. “You will get hurt.”

Seok-hyeon looked at you in shock for speaking up against him. “Why you little- I ought to cut out your tongue for that!” He yelled furiously. 

“Like how you killed that guy in the blazer before? How did that turn out, again?” You asked rhetorically as you brought a hand up and gently poked at the bruise on his forehead. “Oh, yeah. You got hurt,” you laughed. 

Seok-hyeon put the hand holding the box cutter down and held up his other one instead, about to strike you when two separate hands latched on and stopped the hand before it could reach you. You smirked slightly, a bit surprised but mainly finding it funny how the anger on the man’s face went from 10 to 100. 

“Go inside,” Eun-hyuk ordered him. He yanked his hand away before retreating to the nursery, cursing as he walked. 

The bespectacled boy sighed and rubbed at his eye before looking at you. “Why would you taunt him? You should know he’s not above hitting people.”

“He was never going to hit me. If not for the two of you, I would’ve made sure of that myself,” you promised him. You turned around so you were facing both boys and smiled at them both gratefully. “I’ll see you in there,” you told them before heading into the daycare. 

“What did you say?” You heard one of the members of the new team to join the bottom floor, Jae-heon, ask as you got closer to the group.

“We can’t just do that,” the other newest member, Ji-su, backed him up. You were confused about what you couldn’t do, but it was cleared up with Seok-hyeon’s next sentence. 

“We can’t miss golden hour,” he said, and you knew they were talking about what they should do about Hyun-su. 

“The Lord said you-” Jae-heon started until the store owner interrupted him. 

“I’m sure Jesus never lived in a world like this, did He? It’s for all our safety!”

You slid down the wall of a pillar and placed your head in your hands, another headache forming from all the arguing. It seemed that was something you were going to need to get used to in this new world. 

You couldn’t help thinking of how much you missed your dad, your siblings, hell even the annoying bird that woke you up each afternoon. You missed your home, and you weren’t sure if you would ever see it again. 

The thought made you tear up until a slam of a box on a table uninterrupted your thoughts. 

“Here,” Eun-hyuk started. You weren’t sure when he had entered the room but when he did your eyes immediately glanced around the room for where Hyun-su could be stationed. You frowned when you didn't see him.

“What’s that?” Seok-hyeon asked.

The boy held up a stack of sticky notes. “Everyone please grab a piece of paper. If you think we should expel Hyun-su then go ahead and draw a circle,” he started to explain. You couldn’t help the sliver of fear in your stomach as you figured out he wanted to do a voting system. You couldn’t figure out who would be on which side of this group and it scared you.

It scared you for Hyun-su’s sake.

 “And if you don’t think we should, draw an X. Then put the paper in this box.”

“He’ll obviously be kicked out, why bother?” Seok-hyeon asked cockily. “Raise your hand. I want him out,” he started his own voting system and faced the residents. “Hands up. Hands up!” 

No one raised their hand. 

It was when he saw this and saw not even his wife raise her hand that he turned to her. “Raise your hand, you cow.”

Seon-yeong looked contemplative, scared to disobey but not wanting to raise her hand either. Luckily, a familiar voice interrupted everything. 

“Well, I don’t,” Eun-yu announced as she walked into the room. 

“You’re way too young to vote,” Seok-hyeon complained. 

“It’s the end of the world, who gives a shit about ages in voting?” You asked quietly but everyone could hear you in the silence of the room. Eun-yu smirked at your words. 

“Exactly, age doesn’t matter.”

“How dare the two of you talk back to me? When an adult speaks, you should listen,” he scolded and you rolled your eyes before plopping your head in your arms again, something he saw. “Don’t fucking roll your eyes at me! You’ve really been pissing me off today!”

You made no move to respond to him and his attention was captured by a bunch of hand movements from Eun-yu, secretly spelling out the words “FUCK BASTARDS LIKE YOU.”

“Did you just swear at me?” The shopkeep asked her, confused by the strange movements. “If I was your dad, I’d give you a good old-fashioned beating!”

“Of course you would, because you’re abusive,” you whispered, but apparently Ji-su heard it since she was standing next to you and she let out a laugh before slapping a hand over her mouth to stifle it. You shot her a grin. 

Eun-yu smiled extra sweetly at him and shook her head. “I didn’t. I said you’re cool,” she reassured falsely before aiming a finger gun at him that spelled out the words she just signed to him and pretended to make the gun go off. 

“To protect everyone’s privacy,” Eun-hyuk continued as Eun-yu moved to sit on the ground against the pillar with you. The two of you shared a quick fist bump before paying attention. “It must be a secret ballot.”

“What?” Seok-hyeon asked, confused.

“Because expelling him… would be like taking part in murder.”

Everyone stayed quiet at the boy’s words and your eyes stared off into space, glazed over with worry for the boy you grew fond of over those short meetings. 

Seok-hyeon scoffed when he saw the looks of conflict on everyone’s faces, standing up to face them. “Privacy? No way, man,” he laughed it off before raising his hand. “I want him out. Hands up. Hands up! It’s not murder,” he tried to convince. “We’re doing this to survive. Don’t be scared now!”

He turned to his wife to start screaming at her and demanding she raise her hand but your mind drifted, your teeth pulling at your fingernails in your worry over the boy who must have been in the next room over since you couldn’t see him in the room you were in. You only stopped picking at your nails when Eun-yu pulled your hand away from your mouth. Instead, she placed a pen and paper in it, silently telling you the voting had started. You drew down an X, obviously. There was no way you were letting Hyun-su get kicked out, even if that meant threatening to leave with him or doing whatever it takes to make sure he stays safe.

live a little!

hyunsu ? x gn!reader

genre: ‘idont knowww he likes you’ that’s the genre

warnings: mentions of death, blood and injuries, cursing, monster hyunsu jumpscare, attempting to work with the “monster hyunsu does what hyunsu desires” thing except it takes place in season one and i’m trying to make it as fitting to canon as possible, this is a badly written mess Sorry!

synopsis: The day Hyunsu’s mind acknowledges his feelings for you, but he himself doesn’t quite realize.

author’s note: if you’re desperate for a part 2 to up close & personal you can pretend this is a prequel because it kind of fits? anyways i’ll write for Hyunsu hyunsu eventually too i miss him it’s been a bit

“You’re no fun.” Hyunsu laughs.

His voice is heavy and he’s struggling to catch his breath, practically stumbling over his words. In fact, he’s practically stumbling over his own feet due to how impatient and quick his movements are. His face, usually so stoic and soft, is now covered in blood and adorned with a maniacal grin, paired with those hiccupy laughs of his. He looks positively fucking insane.

“Yes, well. If that means valuing staying alive, I’ll be no fun.” you say, fingers holding the hood of Hyunsu’s jacket tightly. He tilts his head in your direction, looking at you with those black, glassy eyes. Your gaze hardens, “What?”

He scoffs. “Live a little.” he says, tone light. He brushes off your hand and takes a step into your personal space. His voice drops to a whisper, one that sounds almost mocking for a short time. “You’re so hellbent on surviving, but are you even living?”

You’re forced to back into the railing behind you and hold onto it, eyes never leaving Hyunsu’s.

“Come on. You’re not gonna tell me I’m wrong.” he scoffs softly, leaning down, “Right?”

“Get it together, Cha Hyunsu.” you say, glaring a little. The latter grins.

“What? You think I’m out of my mind? Why would I need to get it together?”

“If anyone else had been here to see you, you would’ve been killed already. Look at yourself.”

You hear the railing behind you creak, and you feel Hyunsu’s hand on your back saving you from a fate similar to the one he’d faced towards the beginning of this apocalypse before you feel the metal moving away from you. The sound of it breaking and falling down from the flight of stairs is loud and makes you flinch.

He pulls you away from the edge and lets go of you.

“You’re welcome.” he says, tone flat, “I know what I look like. But they couldn’t kill me if they tried. Now let’s go kill some monsters already.”

He seriously doesn’t get why you shoot him this annoyed look of yours. (He just saved you! Hello?!) After all, what’s so wrong about this? Killing monsters? That’s literally the only thing everyone in this fucking building keeps him alive for, right? It’s always Hyunsu do this, do that, save us, don’t kill us, and now, get it together. That’s why everyone should die.

Then again, he knows you think differently from the others. You’re telling him to snap out of it so he won’t be cast out by the others even more. That’s why you came with him. Why you never abandoned him.

Because you… care. Surprisingly.

Ah, now I get it, Hyunsu. he thinks. You care about this person much more than you realize.

He sighs and tilts his head. “Come on.” he sighs, tone somewhere between pleading and annoyed.

“We have stuff to retrieve. For everyone else.” you say, gaze averting to the place you were just standing at. “Let’s not take unnecessary risks.”

Hyunsu drums his fingers against the spear in his hand, eyes narrowing a little. “Do you really think I care about anyone in this place enough to get their shit?” he asks calmly, “You’re mistaken.”

“He does.” you sigh, “Whether it’s a good thing or not, he does.“

“And that’s really not my problem.” It is.

He hears the growl of a monster in a corridor nearby and turns towards the direction of the sound. Killing everyone. That’s what he wants. That’s what he cares about. He swings the door open and steps in, before stopping.

He leans back just enough to look at you from the side of the door. “Are you sure you won’t come?” he asks, a small smile pulling at his lips.

You seem to still be frightened by what would’ve happened if he hadn’t caught you. Frightened by the idea of falling from so high. He heaves a deep sigh and steps back out, just enough to grab your arm and pull you closer.

“You’re alive, aren’t you?” he says, “Stop thinking about almost falling to your death.”

When you’re closer to him like this, Hyunsu feels confused. Well, this is clearly a crush, he thinks. But he doesn’t think that is something that he should be able to feel. It’s like an instinct to reach out to protect you. A reflex. Maybe it’s his feelings? He’s not sure.

“It’s hard to think about anything else.”

“Then focus on me.” he says. The word ‘me’ comes out a bit harsher than the rest, a bit like it’s echoing. He lets go of your arm. “And all will be well. That’s crazy practical, right?” he scoffs.

“I don’t get you.” you say, crossing your arms. “Are you trying to help me?”

He takes a deep breath and closes the door a little to look at you properly, leaning against the edge of it. “To be honest with you, I mostly just care about myself.” he answers easily, “But…”

You. You who looks at this part of him and cares, still. Who doesn’t even seem scared. Who just wants to make sure he’s okay, in spite of everything.

Maybe you deserve to be excluded from the ‘everyone’ that he wishes would just die.

He thinks he can find a middle ground. A way to reach some sort of agreement with Hyunsu. You may just be the key to getting him to accept his own self. He shrugs. “Who knows.”

He lets the weaker half of him take control again. After all, each time a danger seemed to get too close to you, the instinct to help you and get you away before it could reach you was his. So as the greater part of him, he would do everything he can to help him out. And right now, that would be letting him deal with all this and maybe try to bargain for this whole control thing.

“Hyunsu.” you say, eyes wide. His own eyes have finally returned to their usual state. He blinks, taking a few seconds to register what’s going on, then his eyes widen as well.

“Are you okay?!”

“Uh…” he trails off, looking towards the edge of the stairs, where there should have been a railing. Then he looks at your relieved expression, then at the half-opened door. “Yeah, yeah, I’m…”

He thinks for a moment then slowly, carefully closes the door. “I’m fine. Are you? Maybe I should go alone.” he says.

“No, it’s fine. I’m alright. Let’s go together.”

(I could help you keep them safe.)

His hand tightens around his spear as he tries to ignore how loud his mind is.

No. Shut up.

“… Okay. Let’s go, then.”

He has a lot to do. There’s a list of things the other residents asked him to get for them. You didn’t have to go with him, but you did, which means he has to make sure you both survive this whole thing. He has a lot of things to focus on, and none of them include the monster in his head trying to get him to listen.

Maybe one day, he’d accept it.

Who knows?

Bittersweet II Cha Hyun Su x Reader

Cha Hyun Su x Reader

Summary: In the aftermath of a nightmarish struggle for survival, strained bonds and lost memories characterize the heartbreaking exchange between you and Hyun Su, where a desperate attempt to bridge the gap between shared experiences unfolds, leaving a lingering sense of loss as you face an uncertain future together.

the first part, kinda ~~~~~ the next part, kinda

Masterlist

~~~~~

The last few hours unfolded as a nightmarish chapter in the ongoing struggle for survival. Your group of survivors had been taken hostage, forced to fight off scavengers seeking harm. The struggle for survival had strained your bonds, particularly the delicate balance after Ui Myeong's inclusion, triggering an unspoken personal turmoil with Hyun Su and the others but also between you two.

After your decisive move to aid the vent lizard monster, the atmosphere grew more strained. Pushing past Hyun Su, you rushed to aid the vent lizard monster, recognizing the fear it instilled in others, your determination to buy time for the creature clashed with escalating threats. Hyun Su and Ui Myeong had disappeared during the chaos, leaving you with a lingering regret of missing the chance to talk to Hyun Su once more. You had seen  his face as the others tried to kill the jelly monster.

Returning to the common area, you collaborated with fellow survivors, sealing the entrance in a desperate attempt to ward off hostile monster attacks and create a brief illusion of security for the night. The atmosphere remained charged with anxiety and uncertainty, survivors grappling with the aftermath of relentless assaults and the toll it took on their collective psyche.

Sang-wook's sudden dash with Yu-Ri on his back disrupted the makeshift sanctuary. Concern etched on your face, you inquired about the situation, opening a dialogue with Sang-wook to understand the urgency of their escape plan. His brief words revealed the desperate need for a refill of Yu-Ri's asthma spray, and with a sense of urgency, he handed you the car keys. Taking charge, you sprinted towards the abandoned vehicle, only to be abruptly blocked by a sudden force, sending you flying, disoriented, and confused as you overheard the end of their conversation.

"Does it matter? We won't be here. I will go with you," Hyun Su declared, bewildering you as you tried to pierce together the events that unfolded amidst the chaos. The urgency of the situation and the underlying tension left you grappling with the unknown.

Confusion reigned as you attempted to convey the urgency of Yu-Ri's situation, but Hyun Su's unfamiliar coldness dismissed your concerns as you came back up to your feed. The following sequence of events played out in slow motion, culminating in a moment of shock as Ui-Myeong aimed the gun at the departing duo, gunfire echoed, and Hyun Soo's anguished scream reverberated.

As Ui Myeong redirected the gun toward you, a sudden push threw you into a wall, pain radiating through your body, ultimately knocking you out. The chaos intensified with gunshots and screams, leaving the fate of Hyun Su and the others hanging in uncertainty.

Upon regaining consciousness, the landscape had changed once again. Sang-wook and Yu-Ri and even Mister Han were gone, leaving a void in the group dynamics. Hyun Su stood among the survivors, his memories wiped clean. Ui Myeong gone. The weight of the day's losses threatened to bring forth tears that remained elusive.

Stepping closer to Hyun Su, despite the heaviness that lingered in the air, you extended a hesitant hand, your fingers brushing against his arm as if seeking an anchor in the disarray that had become your reality. His eyes, a canvas of confusion, held a spark of recognition that flickered and faded like a distant star.

"You don't remember..." you began, the words caught in your throat as you gazed into the depths of his bewildered eyes. It was a plea, an attempt to bridge the gap between the shared experiences that seemed to be slipping away from him.

His expression softened, an acknowledgment of the void he couldn't fill. "Thank you for saving me again," you continued, the gratitude woven with a tinge of sorrow, sitting next to him. Every syllable carried the weight of moments that seemed destined to be forgotten.

A somber silence hung between you, punctuated only by the echoes of the distant hum of the shelter's generator. In that silence, you found the courage to address the unspoken pain that lingered between you and Hyun Su.

"I don't remember saving you. Or you," he confessed, his voice carrying the weight of an apology he couldn't fully understand.

The admission cut deep, like a wound that refused to heal. In that moment, you chose not to dwell on the fragments lost in the recesses of his mind but to weave new threads of connection. "It doesn't matter," you whispered, your voice a gentle reassurance that sought to bridge the gap. "I will always remember you."

Hyun Su's gaze faltered, self-doubt clouding his eyes. "Isn't it inconvenient for me to be here? Shouldn't you be afraid like the others?" he questioned, baring the vulnerability that lingered beneath the surface.

The words hung heavy in the air, a reminder of the fractures in his memories and the trust that seemed to be slipping away. With a steadying breath, you addressed the uncertainty that loomed. "We've had this conversation before," you said, your eyes meeting his with unwavering sincerity.

You extended your hand like so many times before, a silent plea for him to hold on, to grasp the hand you were offering. His gaze didn't meet yours, the unspoken invitation hanging in the somber atmosphere. His eyes, filled with uncertainty, locked onto your hand, and you hesitated, uncertain if he would recognize the gesture.

 He didn´t. Uncreatin looking at your hand. In an act of boldness and with embarrassingly red cheeks, you gripped his hand, holding it tight. His confusion reflected in his expression, you held his gaze and, with a deep breath, spoke softly, "I trust you, Hyun Su." The words lingered in the air, a testament to the connection that surpassed the boundaries of fleeting recollections.

"With or without your memories, I trust you."

His gaze met yours, and you saw a flicker of gratitude in his eyes, as if sensing the depth of your unspoken pledge. A fleeting smile graced Hyun Su's lips, a fragile bridge between the past and the uncertain present.

In that moment, you chose to focus on the small victories, finding solace in the fragments that remained. The weight of uncertainty lingered, but the warmth of the connection you sought to rebuild offered a glimmer of hope in the aftermath of the day's turmoil.

Unbeknownst to you, this heartfelt exchange marked the last time you would speak with Hyun Su for a very long time.

Hi , i have a request, I wanted to know if you could do a cha hyunsu x fem reader , where in season 1 , reader is pregnant but doesn’t get a chance to tell Hyun su , and in season 2 , reader and baby boy run into Hyun su and everyone at the hospital, so baby boy runs off after friend (monster) or something and Hyun su /monster form finds out about the tie son with reader 💕if so thank you so much I’ve been asking so many people😭💕

hello!! thank you for your request, it was really fun to write but im so sorry it took so long to write!!🫶 here’s the fic for you ( i also adjusted the timeline so that it makes more sense, so rather than it being less than a year time skip like the show, it’s now a 1 year and 6 month time skip) <3 i feel like this could have a part 2 but im unsure so lmk what you think!!!

cha hyun-su x f!reader for @dadyscumslutprincess20

warnings:none

Masterlist

you stared down at the pregnancy test in your hand, your breath shaking and your hands trembling. you were in complete disbelief. there was no way it was real. right?

with a gulp, you wrapped the pregnancy test in some tissue and shoved it into your pocket. you were trying to think about the timeline and ways to tell hyun-su specifically. after all, he deserved to know the most.

when was the best time to tell him? how would you bring it up? and how would he react? these were all the questions that ran through your mind.

as time went on at green home apartments, you tried to approach the topic when you were with hyun-su but each time for some reason you found yourself unable to do so. whether it be because of certain circumstances or whether it be because your words kept getting caught in your throat.

for some reason you were unable to tell him.

and then when you finally built up the courage to tell him, hyun-su had given himself up to the military.

after making it out safely from green home apartments, you separated from the rest of your friends and tried to look for hyun-su.

but as months passed, you began to lose hope. you also had other things to focus on. as your due date approached you hid out in an abandoned hospital. it was the best place to be as it was safe and convenient.

and soon enough you gave birth to a beautiful baby boy.

before you knew it, it had been over one and a half years since you’d last seen hyun-su. and your baby boy was now just over 10 months old. he was already starting to crawl and life keeping him hidden and safe was harder than ever since he’d always manage to crawl away when you least expected it.

the day started like usual. you woke up early, fed your son and began your daily tasks of making sure the abandoned hospital was as safe as it could be.

you carried your son on your hip as you made your way to the area you usually would sleep in. you were going to put your son down for a short nap, that was until you heard noises that sounded like feet.

you put your son down and drew out your gun. you checked the entire floor you were on just in case but there wasn’t anyone or anything that you could see. you let out a breath of relief when you didn’t find anything but when you went back to your sleeping area to check on your son, your heart dropped.

he was gone.

you began to panic.

maybe he’d just crawled somewhere?

you searched the entire floor again but he was no where to be found. you hurriedly rushed to the floor below. you cautiously looked around, you knew that sometimes start monsters would wander the halls.

your heart beat pounded in your chest. you could hear a baby cooing. you followed the sound and rushed to the room it sounded like it was coming from.

as soon as you entered the room, you saw some familiar faces.

you immediately recognised eun-yu and hyun-su. but you didn’t recognise the third person with them. on the floor nearby, there sat a small monster playing with your son.

“y/s/n!” you breathed a sigh of relief as you ran to pick up and cradle your child.

“y/n?you’re alive?” eun-yu couldn’t believe her eyes.

you let out a smile and nodded your head and she rushed to hug you.

“is he yours?” she then asked and you smiled as you handed him to her.

“meet y/s/n, my son” you whispered and she looked towards the guy you’d never met before.

“this is chan-young” eun-yu briefly mentioned and you sent him a smile.

your eyes then wandered to hyun-su. something about him was different, his eyes were a deep dark blue colour and his expression wasn’t one that you recognised. his whole demeanour had changed and yes, while you hadnt seen him im over a year, you still knew him.

you furrowed your eyebrows trying to figure out why he was so different and as soon as you saw him smirk, you instantly knew.

this was hyun-su’ monster form that was out.

“y/n” he eyes looked you up and down as he licked his lips.

“hyun-su” you swallowed hard as hyun-su then made his way towards you.

“have you missed me?” he tilted his head to the side and brought his hand up to brush a stray piece of hair out of your face.

“you’re not hyun-su” you brushed him off.

“but i am, i know all his thoughts, feelings and desires” he looked at your lips when he said the last part.

“leave her alone!” eun-yu suddenly snapped and you turned to her.

“it’s okay” you reassured her and gestured for her to go out the room with your son.

she soon left and chan-young followed.

“where’s hyun-su?” you turned to hyun-su’ vessel in front of you.

“it just hurts now y/n. i am hyun-su but, if you’re talking about our weak side then you should know he’s currently healing. if i didn’t take over he would’ve died so you should really thank me. you must know i can’t have him dying on me” he let out a scoff towards the end.

“when will the other hyun-su be back?” you questioned.

“not for a while..so let’s catch up. it seems that a lot has happened- you have a child. is it ours?”

“it’s hyun-su’ child’” you corrected him.

hyun-su’ monster form chuckled. he noticed all the little details. how you played with your sleeve when you were nervous and how you shifted your weight uncomfortably as you tried to avoid looking directly at him.

he was going to use it to his advantage.

“so, that baby is part mine too” he leaned close to your face and you felt your heart beat quicken “you know? i feel what hyun-su feels and more. tell me y/n, what do you want?”

you closed your eyes, skin tingling as you felt hyun-su’ breath on your skin because of how close he was.

“i-“ you began but were cut off when your son suddenly ran into the room.

in an instant you picked him up and he squirmed in your arms as he then tried to reach over to hyun-su.

you were hesitant but there was a slight glint in hyun-su’ eyes that seemed familiar so you handed the child over to him.

“and who might you be?” hyun-su’ tone changed as he tickled the little boy.

you raised an eyebrow, confused at how quickly hyun-au’ monster form was able to change his demeanour to resemble something similar to the original hyun-su.

maybe they weren’t so different after all.

up close & personal

hyunsu ? x gn!reader

genre: what. mutual pining?

warnings: sweet home 2 spoilers, mentions of blood, injuries. hyunsu himself is a warning lowkey if u watched the last ep u probably get it… that’s all!

synopsis: You know Hyunsu so well. One year apart couldn’t possibly change that. Except if Hyunsu isn’t alone anymore.

authors note: realized at the end of this fic that i cld compare hyunsu’s current situation to venom like a little bit and that just makes everything so much easier somehow. anyways i don’t really like this but i needed to post smt for him after s2 so!

One year ago, you and Cha Hyunsu would’ve been sitting near the entrance of Green Home apartments, and he would be listening to you talk. One year ago, you would’ve firmly believed that by now, the world would’ve been restored to some kind of peace. It had, in a way, but certainly not in the one your past self would have hoped for. And certainly not the one Hyunsu would’ve wanted for the two of you.

Nevertheless, you remained grateful through everything— As much as you could manage. The shelter was as organized as possible and conflict was a surprisingly rare occurence. Things were alright. As long as you didn’t give time for the grief and terror to catch up to you.

But things couldn’t be calm forever. Especially not in the current state of your world.

When Eunyu disappeared with that man from the military, it only took a day before you grew restless enough to depart from the stadium. After all, Eunyu was the closest thing to a friend you had here, at this point. It only felt right to try and find her. And you did, surprisingly, along with a few familiar faces and an unknown one.

You didn’t expect for the evening you found your friend again to be the very same you would see the person you had considered closest to you at Green Home for the first time in… Over a year.

“Finally asleep.” you sighed quietly, watching Eunyu get the rest her body had probably been begging for. It was difficult to convince her you would stand watch and wait for your friend to wake up in her stead, but her exhaustion made her stop arguing eventually.

You turned towards the room he was in.

Cha Hyunsu.

You crossed your arms and sighed. One year without a single trace of him anywhere. And now he… Just reappears? You wanted to be surprised, but part of you really wasn’t. You were angry, just a little— Spending all this time telling yourself he was gone, only for him to come back as if nothing happened felt like a slap to the face. Still, you couldn’t blame him. Yet. You had no idea what happened to him during that time span.

You felt relieved, if anything.

After some hesitation, you walked over to the glass door. Your hand settled on the handle, pushing it open, before your eyes widened. Hyunsu was sitting on the hospital bed, stretching his neck quietly, not at all perturbed by anything. Hell, he even seemed peaceful.

More peaceful than you’d ever seen him.

You stepped inside quietly and let the door close behind you. Hyunsu continued to move his head, slowly, as if trying to relax, and didn’t acknowledge your presence. His shoulder was bloodstained, still, and his hoodie had cuts here and there. Messy as he appeared, this was your friend from Green Home, there was no denying it. You hadn’t even dared hope he could still be alive, after all this time. You couldn’t give your heart such a high possibility of suffering if he turned out to be gone.

And now he was here. So calm.

He opened his eyes with a soft sigh, before turning his gaze to you. “Finally decided to talk to me?” he asked. His tone was different. Too different. This did not feel like the kind of change that happened in a year. He smiled a little at your silence, tilting his head curiously. “No? Do you need more time? That would be too bad.”

He hopped off the bed with a huff and slowly walked over to you. The closer he got, the clearer it became that his eye color was different. Long gone was the blank, dark brown gaze that looked back at you when you two would talk— Replaced by a vibrant sky blue. A stark contrast from what you were used to, as was everything else about him, apparently. Be it his tone or his mannerisms, it all felt deeply wrong, like it wasn’t him at all. You furrowed your eyebrows but stood still, letting him walk to the very edge of your personal space.

“I’ve been waiting to see you for such a long while.”

“Huh?”

Hyunsu’s eyes widened a little before he grinned. This wasn’t … Him. Not exactly, at least. Not the one you talked to so much. But special-cases, or MH, essentially coexisted in one body. The monster forms around a person’s strongest desire, or whatever it was that scientist at the shelter said.

So perhaps, all the times you and Hyunsu had talked in the past had also been conversations that this side of him had been listening to.

A bit scary. You couldn’t really focus on that, though. You took a deep breath and looked at him.

“Is he well?”

He clicked his tongue, expression growing sour. “He’s fine. Let him get some rest. He’s tired.”

You nodded softly, gaze averting. That sounded fine enough to you. He was right, too, earlier— You had been avoiding talking to him since you met again. With the excuse of focusing on Yikyung and scavenging through the hospital, you had plenty of reasons to act as if you weren’t seeing the person you cared the most for after a whole entire year of thinking he was dead.

But you did feel his gaze on you the whole time. It was heavy, and remorseful. You’d planned to talk to him— In fact, that’s why you decided to come over to the room he was in. You hadn’t expected things to turn out this way, however. Seems like you couldn’t talk to your friend, yet.

“It’s nice to know you care, though.” he hummed, gaze never leaving your face. “He thinks about you so much, too.”

You looked back up at him. If this was the so-called monster part of Hyunsu, then what was his deal? A lot of questions about this situation flooded your head. “What are you playing at?”

He chuckled softly, before backing up just enough to hold up his hands in an innocent gesture. “Nothing as evil as you probably think.” he said, voice steady. “I just wanted us to talk. Just us.”

“Huh.”

“You see, your Hyunsu has an interest in you.” he said, tilting his head slowly. It felt as if he was analyzing you. It was a bit unsettling, but you didn’t bother breaking eye contact this time. “But I do, too. I’d say maybe… Even more than him?” his grin widened at his own words.

“I find it hard to believe you care about people.”

“And yet.” he scoffed, expression dropping to a blank one, seemingly annoyed. He dropped his arms to his sides and sighed. “We decided to work together. Couldn’t have him die on me, it wouldn’t be nice for anyone involved.”

You decided this Hyunsu seemed to mean it when he said they made a deal, just about as much as when he said he had an interest in you. So placing your trust in his bloodied hands for the time being, you tried to be less on guard. He wouldn’t kill you, or most importantly, Hyunsu. That was enough for now.

“Okay.” you sighed, crossing your arms. “So you want to talk?”

He smiled a little. “Yes.” he stated, before taking a step towards you. Only this time, he didn’t bother keeping a safe distance. His face was a touch too close to yours. “I’ve wanted to for a while.”

“You…” you paused for a moment, thinking. “Do you usually go around talking to people while getting so close to them?”

“I don’t go around talking to people.” he mocked your tone before scoffing, a grin pulling at his lips. He brought a hand up to your face, holding your cheek firmly. His focus turned to his hand, eyes narrowing in its direction. You felt his fingers loosen a little, as if he was trying to control how tightly he was holding you.

Which he was. Now it felt gentle. Almost unfitting. Not only that but the Hyunsu you knew was never this comfortable with anything close to physical affection. It felt so out of place.

“Does it bother you?” he whispered, eyes flitting over to meet yours again. He moved in closer, just enough for your noses to touch. He seemed to be having fun switching between looking at your eyes and at your lips. “Am I too close?”

Before you could think of a way to answer, you froze. The unfamiliar color in Hyunsu’s eyes dissipated, the cocky expression you were almost beginning to get used to replaced by a soft, almost startled one. His voice, much quieter now, whispered your name. Your eyes widened and you sighed in something akin to relief.

“Hyunsu.” you breathed out. The latter looked at you with a stunned look, struggling to find anything to say for a while. He looked into your eyes like he was making sure you were okay— Making sure you were really alive. His thumb moved back and forth softly over the skin of your cheek, his gaze scanning you in an almost panicked manner. He sighed shakily, before he brought your face into his shoulder. He seemed to be almost trembling.

“I’m sorry.” he exhaled, wrapping his other arm around your shoulders hesitantly. Still terrible at hugging. You’d missed those awkward displays of affection so much. “I… I’m sorry, it’s been… A very long time.”

“God, you’re so cruel, Cha Hyunsu.”

He tilted his head down into your neck. Now you felt his tears on your skin. He really hasn’t changed, you thought. It was obvious when he came running for help when Yikyung was badly injured, when he did everything to help her and went all the way to look for that kid— Cha Hyunsu hadn’t changed.

“I’m—”

“Quit apologizing.” you huffed, holding him tightly. “I missed you, too.”

Hyunsu sighed quietly, tightening his hold on you a little. He was relieved to finally have you with him again, but he couldn’t shake off his worries.

“You talked to… Him? Right?”

“I did.” you said, pulling away enough to look at him. The concern on his features was undeniable. “And it went fine. It’s okay.”

Hyunsu’s frown deepened. “I don’t know if it’s alright. Me staying… So close to you.”

“Don’t even think about disappearing on me again.” you warned, eyes widening. “I don’t care about any reason you give me— Don’t leave again.”

The boy sighed, averting his gaze for a moment, before slowly bringing it back to you.

“I won’t.” he assured, “I won’t leave you again.”

He closed his eyes and pulled you into another hug. He had to believe his existence on its own wouldn’t cause more problems for you to deal with. He had to trust that even if it did, you meant it when you said you didn’t mind. He knew you did. You always meant it.

He opened his eyes and looked at his reflection in the glass door just a bit further away. Seeing you in his arms should have been reassuring. But the blue hue of one of his eyes and the nagging voice in his head seemed to be laughing at his naivety. He pressed his eyes shut again and buried his face in your shoulder.

This is our priority, now. (I know.) No one else comes first. (I know.) Don’t let them get hurt.

I won’t.

══⋆✰* Dating Cha Hyun-Su Includes: *✰⋆══

A/N: In honour of the second season of Sweet Home, this was mandatoryyyy 😁 just started off with some relationship hcs first but feel free to send some imagine or other headcanon requests through my inbox for Sweet Home characters if you're into it! These headcanons cover season one and two. Enjoy reading 🖤

Warnings: Sweet Home series spoilers, mentions of violence

🩸• Starting from the beginning of this monstrous series of events, the most likely way you'll meet Hyun Su is at Green Home a bit before the monster outbreak and apocalypse comes along. All you'll see of the quiet, sullen young man is his weary, unfocused gaze that briefly trails up from the ground to glance up at you in acknowledgement as he bumps into you somehow while moving into his apartment in the complex. The only sign of his interest in you from first looks is his stare lingering for just a beat longer than he'd usually bother... and that's about it. Boy's too shy and broken and tired to feel like he's good enough to do much else, let alone have a shot at even being friends with someone like you, so he'll just admire you from afar every once in a while and leave you to live your life while he despises his.

🩸• HoWeVeRrR-

🩸• The apocalypse unleashes its hell before much else can happen, and before you know it, you two are out surviving in a ruined world riddled with horrifying monsters and mutations, hiding out inside Green Home as you form the group together with the rest and try to fight off the monsters inside the building along with it infecting and warping others into gruesome, inhumane figures.

🩸• This boy's absolutely damaged and drained from all he's been through before moving to Green Home, and so it takes a lot of energy for him to slowly, slowly break out of his shell and reach out to you in return. But he will. He just needs time and patience, and Hyun-Su will find himself making the tiniest amount of small talk when you're together with the rest of the surviving group in the apartment complex. Or, most likely, it'll be him giving you most of his food when you're eating by silently and gently pushing it over to you, no eye contact, no words.

🩸• Before you, he didn't have the slightest will or reason to live, and so the only idea he can think up while dragging himself around the wreck of Green Home along with the rest of the group of survivors is to follow you around and protect you. The way he wants to die is for you, shoving himself into the way of the monster or whatever else the danger is to take him instead. Hyun-Su's absolutely fine with that idea...

🩸• Until he starts falling in loveee- 😏🖤

🩸• Everyone gets used to the sight of this boy following around after you like a moon-eyed puppy, having a tall, slightly dropping shadow trailing behind your own whenever you go somewhere to find food or weapons or whatever you've been sent to find. From Season One, where Lee Eun-Hyuk tries forcing him to do everything and using his monster side as an advantage, if it involves steering clear of you or putting you in any danger, boy's had enough. Hyun-Su will defend himself in his own quiet but intense way, his dark glare bleeding into Eun-Hyuk's with a few mumbling words of a threat before he wanders off to find you again.

🩸• Hyun-Su does consider trying to completely leave you alone, since everyone's aware that he's dangerous with his monster brimming to the surface from inside of him and his other symptoms and dangerous instability being infected, but it feels like the worst form of torture. He's alone again, in a world grimmer than the last, and he has no idea what to do with himself except feel like crying and telling you everything about everything when you sit by him and ask him if he's doing alright.

🩸• I think that this guy would be mega touch-starved after living in isolation for so long after all the bullying and tragedies with his family, so having you as a comforting voice of reason and warmth is something he can't help but melt into after you've been unspoken friends during the apocalypse and doesn't have the fight left in him to reject you if you try to clean bloodstains and patch up his wounds after a nasty confrontation. After that, it's safe to say that out of the whole group of survivors together in Green Home, he'll always be naturally apprehensive and distrusting towards them all, but if it's you that's trying to point something out or is worried about something; let him go get his weapon, he's coming with you.

🩸• His general aim and instinct is to protect good people and be some source of help and comfort that's been so unfamiliar to him personally, but with you, instinct is boosted 10000000% because it's you. You're too good for this world, way too good for him, and if you die, he dies. This concept basically becomes something Hyun Su isn't even fully aware of until the point where you might almost die somehow being confronted by monsters with the others, which is where you'll witness himself having a full-on freak-out in his mind and using all his strength and darker, monstrous side to come out on top to save your life.

🩸• After the danger's gone and you're alone in a quiet room to recover and process what happened, that's all the time you need to make it official, hugging him tightly and thanking him, while Hyun-Su shakily pats your back in return before giving up and hugging you back equally as tightly, staying in a protected embrace as long as time will let you.

🩸• There's so much raw love and trust and protection in a relationship with Hyun-Su, it's unbelievable 😭 he's so clingy and sweet and ridiculously romantic in private with you until you point it out, which results in a blushing red sight and not being able to look you in the eye in bashfulness for about a straight hour before he gets over it. In public, it's still obvious that you're together, with smaller signs of affection and togetherness like holding hands, or doing that coupley thing where you whisper together in the back corners of rooms or give each other brief, subtle looks that say everything you need to understand what it means and where to run or go or something.

🩸• At first, he is a little reluctant to get too close to you because of that lingering fear of accidentally hurting you or his monster side popping out to ruin everything, but with some time and small steps, he'll eventually give up trying to be overly cautious and let him be wholly soothed by you, which was the biggest relief of all for him.

🩸• But just as you're getting properly closer and in touch with each other as romantic partners as well as best friends and survivors in this mess together, his monster alter ego personality will find it the perfect time to mess around with his head and find a way to overpower Hyun-Su, meeting you properly in the process.

🩸• Now, his monster side is a whole other story when it comes to personality, but if you think that means you'll be left alone or hated or something, think AgAiN, and then again, because no :)

🩸• Hyun-Su's monstrous side is darker, daring, dangerous, and with you, madly possessive and protective. I mean, he won't even try to hold himself back from taking things to extremes and spilling as much blood as necessary if he gets a weird vibe from someone around you, or if someone outrightly tries to attack you. Even if it's a monster like him, there's enough threat in thrashing them through a few solid walls and leaving some biting words behind before stalking off.

🩸• Monster Hyun-Su's a massive starer by the way, so those unnervingly blue eyes are going to be a sight you'll have to get used to, like literal inches away from your face when you wake up, studying you for wounds, or just studying you in general. There's something about you that's just so fascinating to him, and this side of him literally does not know what boundaries are, so he's all up in your face studying you in curiosity with a soft but dark smirk on his face, while you're just "😐"

🩸• Kind of gross but Monster Hyun-Su has the weirdest affection ever. Like, he enjoys feeding you when you're hungry, mostly questionably bloody-looking things until you get it in his head that you're not Hannibal Lecter and just want a breakfast bar or something 😭 and when this guy goes to hug you, it'll be ridiculously tight, sometimes his wing breaking out of its shell to wrap over you, which is kind of sweet. Until he goes to kiss you and it's not a kiss at all, it's more him living up to his monstrous reputation by licking at your skin like some kind of dog until you squeal and push him away, which he always finds hilarious. Meanwhile, normal Hyun-Su's mortified 😂

🩸• Normal Hyun-Su and Monstrous will most likely make an agreement between them to make sure you're kept alive and as unharmed as possible, protect you from any sort of danger, so if you thought you had a shadow following after you before the split between them, you've got a much more threatening one now, so it'd be very hard for much damage to come to you at all. And good luck if you want some time alone to wander and think by yourself, because if he doesn't straight-up follow you out with no buts like usual, he'll be watching you somewhere close at all times.

🩸• I feel like Hyun-Su's monstrous side would find it funny to make you jump, like falling down out of nowhere from a building or something right in front of you when you thought you were alone or something stupid like that. You'll give him an annoyed glare of protest, and he'll just smirk smugly and teasingly with a fake-innocent shrug of "something wrong?"

🩸• To sum up the whole. predicament you've gotten yourself into here, falling in love with Hyun-Su would pretty much protect you from ninety per cent of the apocalyptic mess of the world while being showered with all the lost love and affection and longing he thought were dead along with all the rest of his hopes and energy from the beginning. And then to keep you on your toes, you've got the monstrosity inside of his head coming out at random moments to obsess over you before Hyun-Su can come back to reality again. But whoever's at the surface, and wherever you two are, he'll always, always be there watching you and with you, one way or another.

your imprint's on my soul || Cha Hyun-Su x Reader

summary: When Hyun-Su's monster shows up at your door, he teases you and implies that Hyun-Su wants more with you than what you've shared before so, when Hyun-Su wakes up, you decide to act on that.

word count: 4.1k

warnings & tags: canon-typical angst, fluff, smut, explicit consent, dry-humping, thigh-riding if you squint, handjob (male receiving), they're both virgins and are both painfully awkward, this is very soft tbh

first one-shot · previous one-shot

This one-shot can be read independently as there is nothing intense plot-wise that requires having read the other parts, but I do recommend reading them for context.

A/N: sooo, we've reached the first smutty installment for this series, though this feels so tame and so soft I don't even know if it deserves that name. It's what felt right to me for the development of their relationship and what I think makes sense for their characters! I hope you'll enjoy it!

Hyun-Su always knocks. It doesn’t matter that you’ve told him he didn’t have to anymore, doesn’t matter that you’ve offered to give him a key. He still knocks, a soft rap against your door that you’ve learned to recognize from anywhere you are in the house — it’s probably the first time ever that you are truly thankful for the terrible soundproofing in there. When Hyun-Su isn’t there, you spend your time waiting to hear it again, whether consciously or not.

So when you hear something brutally hitting your door, the sound echoing through your silent house, it doesn’t cross your mind that it could be him.

You stumble through the house to grab your bat, heart beating so fast it’s threatening to fall out of your chest. Whether it’s a monster or a desperate survivor trying to get in, you need to be ready to defend yourself.

You’re slowly approaching the door when whoever — or whatever — is outside hits the door twice more.

“C’mon now, I haven’t got all day.”

You still. You recognize the voice instantly, of course you do, but what you don’t recognize is the tone, or even how loud it is, for that matter.

“Hyun-Su?” you call out quietly.

It’s not the smartest decision, because if it’s not him, it lets whatever’s out there know you’re here, but you can’t see yourself leaving him outside.

“You could say that,” the voice answers, and it’s still obviously Hyun-Su, and it’s still wrong, somehow.

But, after a couple seconds of further hesitation, you decide to open the door anyway. You’ve heard it before, that tone, you think, even if it’s blurry now. Plus, you cannot bear the thought of letting Hyun-Su out there, if it really is him. You tighten your hold on your bat, and carefully open the door.

The second you do, Hyun-Su walks in like he owns the place. It is so unlike him that you get ready to swing, but he spots you and grabs it from your hand easily, using his pull on it to get you closer to him, his other hand coming to your waist to stabilize you with a gentleness that contrasts with the abruptness of his movement. Once he does, he shoots you a grin that makes you knees weak, and, as his blue eyes stare straight into yours, you finally understand what is going on.

“All that for me?” he asks, glancing at the bat.

You don’t bother to answer him. You remember too well the state he was in last time you saw this— well— version of him, and your eyes run over his body, followed by your hands, checking for injuries. But while his sweater is in worst shape than usual, and you find blood that you think is fresh on there, his skin is intact under your fingers.

When you look into his eyes again, you find him staring at you, amused.

“You can keep going,” he teases. Your face starts burning and you take a step back, embarrassed, but he follows right after you, eyes devouring you. “Come on, you know you want to. Why not just give in?”

Your back hits the wall, and he leans closer, like a cat playing with a mouse. The difference is, though your heart is hammering in your chest, you don’t feel that scared. Nervous, sure, but there is no actual threat to his tone, or even to his attitude.

“I’m not— I’m not doing anything Hyun-Su wouldn’t want,” you answer, and you somehow find it in yourself to lift your chin defiantly as you do.

Meeting this version of Hyun-Su’s eyes sends a rush of heat through you once again. Beneath the amusement, there is so much more. Fascination. Adoration, even.

He lets out a brief laugh at your words.

“Please,” he practically purrs, “you can’t think that he doesn’t want this.” You stare at him, and his grin widens. “Maybe you should ask him, then.” He leans closer to you, mouth so close to your ear you can feel his breath tickling your cheek. “Ask him what he thinks about when he’s alone at night.” Your cheeks are on fire. “Ask him what he thinks about when you’re lying in bed next to him.” Your breath catches in your throat. “Ask him what he thinks of doing to you.”

He laughs again, and Lord, you don’t know how your legs haven’t given up underneath you yet.

“Come back to me if he still doesn’t have the guts to do anything,” he whispers in your ear. “For now, I think we’ll take a nap.”

That’s all the warning you get before he collapses into you and you can do nothing but slide down to the floor, holding Hyun-Su’s now unconscious body in your arms. You curse the monstrous part of him under your breath, but you know, deep down, that it’s less about that and more about the fact that he’s leaving you with your whole body practically vibrating with feelings and desires you’ve been having more and more as of late.

Your relationship with Hyun-Su is good. It’s great. It makes you happy, so much happier than you thought would ever be possible after the world ended.

But you’d be lying if you said there hasn’t been a— yearning, a longing for more. Something you haven’t put precise words on, something that is almost fully new to you, because though you had fooled around with the boyfriend you briefly had at the beginning of college, the two of you had never gotten really far. You suspect it’s even more foreign to Hyun-Su.

You do know you have an effect on him, you’re not blind. You know how he can get when he loses himself in you, when he finally lets go of all the weight he carries on his shoulders. You, however, also know how embarrassed he gets when his body reacts to you in ways he can’t fully control. You’re just not sure he’s ready for taking the relationship further and, if you’re being honest, the fear of rejection has kept you from bringing up the subject.

Except that after this conversation, the monster’s words are swirling in your mind, and you can no longer pretend that the desire that makes your pulse quicken isn’t there.

Now’s not the time for that, though. You do your best to carry Hyun-Su to the couch, something you doubt you could have done before the Apocalypse forced you to put on some muscle, cover him with a blanket, just in case, because his sweater is starting to have more holes than fabric, and sit by his side so his head rests on your lap. All that’s left to do now, is to wait for him to wake up.

It’s fine, though.

You’re used to waiting for him.

Hyun-Su opens his eyes, and at first, he just feels warm and good and safe. For once in his life, nothing hurts. Your hand’s in his hair, fingers brushing against his scalp pleasantly every now and then and—

And he doesn’t remember coming to your place or seeing you.

He jumps up, eyes surveying the apartment, which looks the same it always does, then you when he turns around. All he sees there is mild confusion.

“Did you have a bad dream?” you ask.

“Did you see him?” he asks in reply.

You frown for a second, before understanding passes on your face, and Hyun-Su feels the blood draining from his face.

Last time, the monster had been with you for a couple minutes, at most. This time…

He hadn’t thought he would come here. He’d been far away, when the group of humans had gotten attacked. Intervening had been the right thing to do, he’d thought — until he’d started getting shot at. The words they’d hurled at him, he’d all heard before, during a time of his life he wished he could forget. With his attention split between the monsters still trying to get past him on one side, and the arrows and bullets coming from the other side, the monster had managed to take over.

And maybe, just maybe, he hadn’t fought it as hard as he should have.

He had never thought you’d get caught in the crossfire.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “Are you— Are you—”

Hurt. Angry. Disgusted.

“I’m fine,” you answer him. You don’t hesitate to reach out to gently touch his face, and your smile is so sincere it’s almost blinding. “Nothing happened.”

He leans into your touch, unable to stop himself, and though he still feels the need to protest, it gets easier to believe you each time you reassure him you don’t despise him.

“It didn’t do anything to you?” he asks, voice low and quiet.

You shake your head, but he can’t miss the way you glance away briefly, avoiding his eyes at first.

“He didn’t hurt me,” you tell him, and he can tell it’s true, but—

“What did it do?” There’s urgency in his voice, panic even. He grabs your arms to look into your eyes, the window to the soul, they say, but he cannot read into you, no matter how much he searches.

“Nothing,” you say, but again, he can tell that there’s more to it, and he doesn’t let go, until you cave in. “He just said something.”

“What did he say?” Hyun-Su presses on. Fear is invading his every bone, wrapping its vines around his heart and squeezing it.

“Nothing important,” you insist, but it only makes him more desperate, because if you don’t want to tell him, it must be something bad, must be something deep and dark and twisted, must be something that could make you hate him. When he doesn’t let up, you sigh. “He just said to ask you something.”

Hyun-Su’s mind goes quiet.

“Ask me what?”

His mouth is dry, his lips move painfully.

“Just— He said, I should ask you what you want to— to do to me.”

It’s like a bomb just went off.

Hyun-Su lets go of you. It feels as if his whole face is burning. Shame and embarrassment overtake him, and suddenly he can’t look at you anymore, just wants to run out the door, but his body is refusing to move. He’s stuck in place like a rabbit in headlights.

“I’m sorry,” he says automatically, whipping his head in the other direction, since that all he can do.

“So, you, um, you… are thinking about it?” you ask, your voice piercing straight through his heart.

“I’m sorry,” he repeats.

“No, no, I’m, uh—”

You grab his hand, scooting closer to him on the couch, until your knees touch his. And it grounds him. Slowly, reason starts to creep back up from under all the thoughts, and he hears the eagerness in your question.

“J-just so we’re on the same page,” you say, as he slowly turns his head to look at you once more, “you’re thinking about… having sex. With me.”

It’s precious, how you lower your voice to say ‘sex’, and then frown in annoyance at yourself. Hyun-Su still wants to tear his hand from yours, run away before you can tell him how much of a freak, of a monster you think he is. But he can’t.

He thinks he’d rather you rip his heart out, as long as you do it with your bare hands, than to live without your touch ever again.

Slowly, he nods. His face and ears are tingling, and he’s sure he’s bright red by now.

“I shouldn’t,” he mumbles. You’ve given him so much already. So much he hadn’t dared to hope for in years. He shouldn’t ask for even more. He doesn’t deserve more.

But your hands tighten around his. Your mouth opens, closes, your tongue comes out to wet your lips as you hesitate and fidget nervously.

“No, you, uh, you should,” you stutter before catching yourself, closing your eyes like you don’t want to see what’s in front of you before you take a leap of faith. “I mean— I think about it. About you.”

A light buzz starts again in his ears.

“I didn’t know,” you keep mumbling. “I mean, I wasn’t sure that you—” Your gaze goes from his hand to the floor, everywhere so you don’t have to look at him. “That you wanted me. So I’m— It’s, uh, it’s good to know.”

“I want you,” Hyun-Su blurts out without thinking, and of course then you look at him, with wide, pretty eyes, and if he wasn’t blushing before, he sure is now. His face could burst into flames any second. “I hate that I can’t—” His eyes fall on your legs, with the dress you’re wearing riding up on your thighs. “—touch you.” If he wasn’t so scared, if he was braver… “I just…” A whisper. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You wouldn’t,” you say patiently. “I trust you.”

“But I don’t,” he mumbles, looking down at the floor. “You’re so— fragile. If I lost control for a second…”

He sees you hesitate. He expects you to tell him, again, that he wouldn’t lose control, maybe that the monster inside him wouldn’t hurt you. Thing is, you might be right, but it doesn’t matter how unlikely it is. That’s not a risk he can take.

“Okay,” you say instead. “Okay. But what if— what if I was the one touching you?”

He almost wishes you hadn’t said it, with how badly he immediately wants it.

“You don’t have to do that,” he says. His throat is dry. His whole body is aching for you.

“And if I want to?” You tilt your head, all pretty, and oh, how can he deny you anything?

“Please,” he whispers.

Your lips part and your breath seems to stutter, before you lean in and kiss him, and it’s like he’s finally come home. It starts off soft, slow, no different from any kiss the two of you have shared in the past weeks. Your hand comes up to cup his face, thumb stroking his cheek.

Hyun-Su melts. He parts his lips to welcome in your tongue, lets you take the lead and set the pace for the kiss without thinking about it twice.

Then he feels you move. It’s barely there at first, your hand that’s not on his face coming to rest on his shoulder, and all that is known territory. Even if your fingers actually touch his skin there, because of the numerous holes in his clothing, he can handle that.

His eyes snap open again, though, when you move your leg over his so you can come sit in his lap, straddling him. You notice immediately.

“Is that okay? We can stop—”

“No, I—”

He doesn’t want you to stop. He wants more with you, so bad, and though he would never say it out loud, he’s desperate for you to show him that you’re not disgusted in him. Every time you kiss him, every time you touch him, every time you take his hand and lead him in bed with you, he comes closer to truly believing it.

But, ah, with this last conversation, even if it’s not the first time he’s had you in his lap, he feels— heated. He can feel himself growing hard, and he’s still embarrassed at the thought that you can feel him. Despite what he said, his hands are on your waist, holding tight. He doesn’t remember if he chose to do that.

After all, his desire for you aligns with what the monster wants so closely that he’s— scared. He’s so scared of losing control. But you’re looking at him so lovingly, and he wants you so bad… Can he be selfish? Just this once?

“Don’t stop,” he almost begs, and seeing how eagerly you nod in reply is like an explosion of warmth in his chest.

Your lips crash against his again, harder, with more purpose. Your fingers card through his hair, and the feeling of your light pull on them goes straight to his core, more enjoyable than he thinks it should be, though he’s in no position to linger on it, not when the next thing you do is to experimentally roll your hips on top of him.

From your perspective, it’s a clumsy movement, one you’re unsure of. From his, it’s a rush of pure pleasure when you rub against his hard cock, one that makes him openly moan, his mouth falling open enough that he breaks the kiss. The second he realizes what kind of noise came out of him, he raises his hand to cover his mouth, cheeks turning crimson.

He’s not daring to look at you, not at first anyway, until he feels your lips brushing against his fingers, pressing soft kisses against his hand.

“Still good?” you ask.

And he is, but he’s not trusting his voice all that much for now, so he just nods. A smile dances on your lips as you kiss down his jaw.

“Also,” you add, “I’m not— I don’t have much— experience, in all, uh, that. So you should— you should let me know. What feels good. What doesn’t.”

“That felt good,” he admits quietly, and your smile turns into a grin against his skin.

“I could tell.”

What you don’t say is how hot you found both the sound and the thought that you could affect him like that, how badly you want to press your legs together so you can alleviate the ache you’re feeling down there, how you’re worried you actually want him even more than he wants you.

Instead of saying all that — it would make you feel so naked and so vulnerable, and disarm you completely, which doesn’t seem like a good idea for now —, you start trailing your kisses down his neck. There’s one spot there that makes him whimper, more discreetly than before, but you latch onto it all the same, tongue coming out to flick against the skin, pulling on it softly between your teeth. He writhes and whines under you, and when his cock rubs against you just right, you gasp against him.

You’re delighted to see reddish skin when you pull away. He’ll heal, and there will be no trace of it by morning, but there’s something satisfying about it — and the glassy look he gives you, lips swollen and parted, hair a mess on the back of the couch, with that proud mark right above his collarbone… is purely sinful.

Your fingers hook in his hoodie.

“Can I?” you ask.

He’d go to the moon and back for you.

He nods.

You pull it over his head, struggle a little when it gets caught in his hair, then manage to pull him free and kiss him again with a giggle. It’s sweet. You’re still wearing your dress, but it’s the first time he feels your hands directly on his skin all the same, and even if his body’s burning up, your touch sets him ablaze.

You explore his body with hungry eyes and hands, follow the shape of his pectorals, then move down to his abs. You trace the muscles, slowly, and as you move down, closer to his crotch, he can no longer suppress a shiver. You still for a second, and he watches you with wide eyes, waiting for you to keep moving, so badly wanting you to keep going. Finally, your fingers brush against the button of his jeans. Silently, meeting his eyes, you ask for his permission. He swallows, nods again.

He’s nervous, almost painfully so, but he notices that your fingers are shaking as you have to try three times to get it open, and it reassures him, in some ways. It reminds him that, for all the issues he has, this is new for the both of you. There are no expectations to meet, just the two of you discovering, together, what works for you.

Once the button isn’t in the way, you, very carefully, move your hand under his jeans, but over his boxers. The second he feels your hand hesitantly closing over his cock, even through the fabric, he throws his head back, trying his best not to moan again and only half-succeeding.

You watch his reactions closely as you keep touching him, slipping your hand under the boxers after a few seconds. This time he does moan, a high-pitched noise that you take to mean you’re doing something right — even if you have no idea what you’re doing. How tight should your grip be? How fast should you move? Should you be saying something? Should he be saying something?

His cock is rock hard between your fingers, harder than you’d have expected; larger, too. It seems to have been that way for a while, maybe since you’ve started kissing, based on how wet with precum it is. You tighten your grip around it a little, then slide your hand down, slowly, down to the base. He moans again, and you feel him twitch between your fingers.

“Um,” you mumble, “I, uh, I don’t really know— is that— is there anything I should—”

Hyun-Su’s looks up at you, flushed and panting. One of his hands comes to your thigh, and now you’re the one shivering under his touch. You don’t think he even notices though. You’re dripping wet yourself, but for now you just want to make him feel good. If things go well, if he stays open to this sort of things, there’ll be plenty of time to deal with that… later. At the moment, all you want is to show him that pleasure doesn’t have to lead to anything negative.

“J-just, keep going,” he mumbles. “You can, ah, you can go a little faster, if you…”

The rest of his words gets lost in the next moan as you follow his advice, moving your hand up and down his cock, the wetness helping the movement. Despite yourself, you rock your hips against his leg, the pressure of it between your legs feeling so delicious, you can’t deny it to yourself at the moment.

Under you, Hyun-Su is lost in pleasure. Your rhythm is hesitant, you’re not holding him quite as tight as he’d like, but oh, your hand is soft and gentle, and it still feels so much better than his own. The fact that you’re all pressed against him, your breath against his neck, your scent filling him, it’s all much more than what he had imagined — because, yes, in shameful moments, he’d pictured this kind of scenes, but they had never felt as good, pleasure running through his veins and flooding his body.

Any time he indulged in them, though, he came faster than usual, and now, with the real thing, he realizes too late how quickly he is approaching his climax.

“Wait,” he hears himself mumble, “I’ll—”

But he’s already coming, and the strength of the orgasm leaves him breathless as he humps against your hand, trying to make it last longer.

“Oh,” is all you comment, and even through the haze, embarrassment spreads through him as he realizes that there’s cum on your hand and on his stomach. At least he cannot turn any redder now.

“Sorry,”  he mumbles, “sorry, I—”

“No, I— I thought that was pretty hot, actually,” you say, giving him a smile, and thank fuck you’ve taken his hand off him, because he wouldn’t want to have to explain why that’s making him twitch again. “I’ll just— you probably want to get cleaned up.”

“I’m— Yeah, but—” He glances down at your body. He felt you rocking against him earlier, even if he wasn’t exactly in the right mind to say something about it. “Don’t you— Don’t you want to, uh…”

“Ah, I’m fine, I just— I just wanted to make you feel good for now.”

And just as he thought his heart rate might go back to normal at some point, there it is, spiking again.

“We can do that— some other time. If you’d like to.”

There is nothing he wouldn’t give to you.

“I would. I would like that.”

Your smile is a promise for more, your kiss is sweet, and for the first time in forever, Hyun-Su forgets about the monster.

He’s in your arms, and it’s all that matters.

i’ve been trying to figure out what to put here. i already feel like i’m kinda begging for comment on my posts, which i don’t like doing, but i figured i’d try to explain at least once what i’ve been feeling lately — plus i'm starting a new job on Monday and i don't know how much time i'll have to write after that. truth is, the lack of interactions i’ve been getting on here, on these stories, has been kind of depressing to me. i know people are reading them, considering the amount of notes, and it’s hard not to question whether it’s my writing that’s not good enough to make people want to leave a comment, or if it's just how fandom is now and in that case it just might not be for me anymore. i mean, i write for myself first, but i post because i want to share with others, i want to see their reactions, know how my writing makes them feel… and lately it just feels like i’m screaming in the void and nothing else. it’s been hard to stay motivated honestly. so, yeah. you don’t have to leave a comment, especially if you didn’t like it, i get it, i’m not trying to guilt-trip you. i just. feel the need to explain this at least once, in case it changes someone’s mind, and if it doesn't, i'll know i tried. if you've ever commented, reblogged with tags, sent an ask, know that i'm so thankful for you and you truly keep me going.

next one-shot

AMBER STARS

IDOLS! BTS X CHUBBY! READER IDOLS/SOULMATES/MAGIC AU

Summary: Loneliness is not something easy to handle for anyone. As someone with no ability and no soulmates, it's something I have to face every single day of my life. Needless to say, there always comes a day when the affected reaches a breaking point.

Lucky for me, it miraculously occurs when the bond finally decides to take pity on me and send me right in their arms.

CHAPTER 3 (4.7K words)

Masterlist

With my bag clutched to my chest and the luggage against my leg, I brave through the slightly crowded airport with a weird chill following me. It feels like forever ago since I last went out, and I can't help but feel a discomfort at being outside of my home like this.

Had it not been for my soulmates, I would not have left at all. What was I thinking, insisting to take the plane alone? I should have asked Yoongi to come with me, even if it would've felt wrong to ask for so much of his time.

To think that I met them for the first time only yesterday, and now I'm on my way to Korea to spend a week with them at their home. It feels surreal, as if I'm in a dream and I can't figure out how to wake up yet.

I look around me, already confused about where to go from here. There are so many panels with confusing information on them that I can't find the one I need, and the last thing I want is to wait at the wrong place so I need to be careful.

Spotting nearby an employee, I speed up with desperation in my eyes, something that they see right away. I must look pitiful.

After asking for directions a couple of times, I eventually manage to reach the wanted area and sit down next to the window from where I can see the plane I'm to take very soon, a long and deep sigh past my lips. I can't believe that I'm going to be flying in the sky in one of these.

I feel bad that I can't use my ability to move about as I want like Yoongi, that would have been so much easier than this, but then again, I don't think I would've been able to process my situation properly if I could simply teleport so quickly.

This plane is helping me to see as real the fact that my life is changing. Other than learning that I have an ability after all, the fact that I have not one, but seven soulmates. Idols or celebrities, I don't really know which term is more appropriate. Maybe both work just fine.

Very few people are sat in my corner, and I come to wonder if the plane will be busy for my flight. It's starting to feel like it's going to be only the few of us. The plane seems too big for only a dozen people, but maybe more will be on the way.

I look at the time, finding that I still have about an hour before the boarding time. I could walk around and visit some of the shops around here and get something to eat, but I'm so scared of missing the timing and coming back to a plane already gone that I don't dare move from my seat.

Just as I'm about to lock my phone and put it in my bag, a notification comes in from the group chat letting me know that there are... over twenty messages sent and... oh, there's a private message as well.

I'll start with the private one, if only because it'll be easer to handle than the storm awaiting me in the other.

Strongmuscle (jungkook): Hey Y/N, I figured you were going to board the plane soon and wanted to know how you were doing. I'm thankful that you agreed to join us in Korea so soon, but I'm worried that it might be going too fast for you. You don't have to say yes to everything we say all the time, just wanted to let you know. We would understand.

How kind of him to write me just to say that... I feel a smile pull at the corners of my lips as I type in an answer. It really has been a while since I last wrote in Korean, I hope I'm not making too many mistakes.

PurpleDumpling: Jungkook, don't worry about me :) it is going fast, but it's also... really not that bad, I can't explain it. Do you think my presence there is too soon?

Strongmuscle (jungkook): Did it sound like that? I'm sorry, that's not at all why I wrote that. I just worry that you're going to be overwhelmed. A lot of people at the agency will want to talk to you, and there will be many meetings with familiar and new faces a couple times until we figure out the best method to keep you safe. I got the feeling you're introverted like me, so I'm concerned.

PurpleDumpling: Will I really meet so many people..? I thought it was going to be like... two or three people for the week?

Strongmuscle (jungkook): ... I'll tell Namjoon to go easy on the meetings while you're here. Have a safe trip, we'll be picking you up at the airport so send us a message once you've landed.

Now growing nervous after learning that I will be seeing a lot more people than I first thought, I switch to the group chat where a few more messages are flowing in at a quick pace. They're giving me quite a lot to read.

Your-hope (hoseok): Do any of you perhaps know if Y/N has sensitive skin? Jin hyung and I are out shopping for her and we can't figure out if we should get combination skin or sensitive. We got the same brand of hair products that we use, and she can always use our soap.

Winter (taehyung): She has combination skin, hyung. Your-hope (hoseok): Then, should I get the scented or unscented products?

Winter (taehyung): Get the unscented one, she reacts to perfume in skin products.

Your-hope (hoseok): Oh! We might have to change the shampoo and conditionner then 🤔

Winter (taehyung): Is there any with a soft scent? She doesn't like when it smells too strong.

MrBeautiful (seokjin): It feels like we're having a test about her likes and dislikes, and Taehyung is the teacher 🤣 We should've brought you along with us, Tae, it would've been so much easier.

Deafcat (yoongi): Or you could always ask her instead of trying to guess everything on your own

MrBeautiful (seokjin): But where would the fun be? I like the thrill of trying to guess.

Your-hope (hoseok): I hate being wrong, though :(

Deafcat (yoongi): Choose your battles, Hobah. I wish Namjoon would've gotten me a plane ticket so I can stay with her, but you don't hear me complaining about it.

Cutieface (jimin): Hyung... you literally grumbled all day once you heard about it, Jungkookie said he couldn't handle it anymore and left the studio early. You didn't even share your food with Namjoon, you usually always share with him.

Deafcat (yoongi): Shush, choose your battles, Jimin-ah.

MrBeautiful (seokjin): You know that we're rich, Yoongi, right? Why don't you buy a ticket now while you still can? Or call the airport, I bet you they'll kick someone out of the plane if needed to give you a spot

Deafcat (yoongi): I thought about it, but I don't want to cause problems. Plus, Y/N said that she wanted to go on her own.

Cutieface (jimin): Because she didn't want to bother you, hyung.

Deafcat (yoongi): ... D'you think it's too late?

Your-hope (hoseok): Try it! I know I would've done so if I could teleport all the way there to spend time with her ^^

Strongmuscle (jungkook): Honestly, it would such a shame if you didn't go Like why have that ability if you don't use it? Literally any of us would've gone if we had his ability? Like hyung? What are you doing man?

Deafcat (yoongi): You know what? Jungkook-ah is right. I'll buy a ticket. Brat.

Strongmuscle (jungkook): ;)

My eyes widen as I find out only this way that Yoongi is attempting to take the plane with me, and for the second time in two days, my phone flies out of my hands when a sudden appearance in front of me scares me.

I meet eyes with Yoongi as he catches it with both hands. He's currently wearing a hat and a mask hiding the lower half of his face, his body clad with the clothes of someone who doesn't want to be noticed, but even then, it's so easy to tell how handsome he is.

If anything, it shows even more right now that he's someone trying to hide his identity!

"Yoongi? What are you doing here?!" I whisper shout as I accept my device while glancing around us to see if anyone noticed him. Can he even do that in an airport? It's so risky! What if someone kicks him out of here?

His eyes crease the slightest bit, and he pats my head as he adjusts his bag's strap over his shoulder, looking pleased even though I can't see most of his face. Those eyes of his are pretty expressive on their own.

"Hi, yes, I know. I have to head to the security checkpoint for a minute, but they know I'm here and are expecting me so I won't be punished, if that's what you're worried about. I'll be back soon, stay right here".

Before I can say anything, he's walking off on his own, and after following him with my eyes for a few seconds, I get to see as security staffs find him halfway to escort him to security. He wasn't lying, they don't look bothered at all that he got here through the wrong door.

I distractedly scratch my nails over my thigh as I observe the way they all seem to flutter around him like excited butterflies, but then realize it might be a good idea to let the others know that Yoongi is here. I hadn't even finished reading the group chat, but now as I notice a dozen more messages, it's a lost cause.

PurpleDumpling: Erm. Yoongi made it here safely, he was brought to security just a minute ago.

MrBeautiful (seokjin): Was he dragged? Does it look like they're scolding him? Did they call the police?

PurpleDumpling: No... I think... they're taking pictures with him? That's what it looks like anyway.

Cutieface (jimin): Ah, that explains why he's so annoyed right now 😂 I didn't think he'd have the guts, but he really did it after all. How are you, Y/N? Excited? It's going to be your first time riding a plane after all!

PurpleDumpling: I'm a little nervous, but having Yoongi with me helps. Thank you for encouraging him to come to me, I really didn't want to take too much of his time by requesting his company.

MrBeautiful (seokjin): Sweetie, Y/N. We're your soulmates, you should never have to feel like you're bothering us. If anything, it'll most likely be us who will bother you most of the time once we're together. Seven men eager to get to know you and take you out on dates, you're going to have to speak up whenever we're too much, otherwise you're going to have a hard time.

PurpleDumpling: Fair point. Thank you, Seokjin, I'll try to remember what you said. Yoongi's coming back so... I'll see you guys later?

Cutieface (jimin): We'll be waiting for you! Have a safe flight ❤️

I put my phone away right as Yoongi sits besides me with a tired sigh. "I'd forgotten what it's like to have staff push each other to be the one helping you. It's a good thing the manager was nearby, otherwise I was going to lose my cool".

Empathetic to his bad experience, I offer him a small smile before looking back to the endless space in front of us, rows of empty chairs leaving a sort of intimacy between us in the silence that looms over us like a warm blanket.

"What did they say about you being here?" I ask him, wondering if he'll have to do anything special since he teleported here just to take a plane back to where he teleported from. He brings his gaze back to me.

"Nothing much, really. I showed my passport and explained briefly about needing to accompany my new soulmate to my country. A document was brought over since I called beforehand, and I had them sign an NDA to make sure they don't reveal your existence before we do. They'll be faxed to the agency's legal team. It's all good".

Wow, someone had to sigh a non-disclosure agreement because of me... "I see. That feels weird, I won't lie".

He chuckles, hand gentle as it grabs mine to hold over his lap. "You'll get used to it, I fear. In our world... there's always someone pushing against boundaries and doing something they shouldn't, or private information that must be strictly controlled. Documents are signed left and right everyday".

"The legal world is scary" I mutter lightly, to which he shrugs just as lightly, thumb soft on my knuckles. "Maybe it is, but it's also what keeps us safe. Don't overthink this too much, you won't have to deal with those things on your own, we have people helping us for a reason".

I nod my head, eyes taking in the few families join our corner for the same flight. Two sets of parents with two to four young children, and another couple with a toddler. It looks like they're going back home after being here on a trip. Three young woman who seem to be travelling together come a moment later.

Yoongi clears his throat weakly, mask pulled higher and cap pulled lower over his face when we notice their BTS goodies hanging on their bags. His eyes show that he feels bad for putting me through this, but really, I'm the one feeling bad that he's going through this just to keep me company.

"Are you sure it's okay for you to be here?" I ask, concerned about what might happen if someone on our flight recognizes him. What happens then, when they see me next to him?

"It is" Yoongi answers matter-of-factly, not willing to hear more of what I have on my mind about this. His shoulders relax when the girls sit further away to eat and drink their coffee away from the sleeping kids. For once, I'm glad to have such young humans near me.

"I want to be here with you" he insists. "We'll have to see how we proceed once we've made it there, though. I might have to teleport back to the car with the others and give you a call to help you find us, but it will all depend on how many people are there. It's hard to tell for now, but everything will be fine, don't worry".

I hum, lips pursed in the face of his confidence. I don't know why I'm so wary of what might happen once we land in Seoul. Maybe it's just my anxiety and he's right. Maybe everything will be fine, as he says.

A stewardess eventually opens the doors of the jet bridge, and Yoongi makes me stand with him as we grab my belongings, as do the other travelers. Slowly, we begin to board the plane one group at a time. Some go right, others go left. In our case, it's the first class that awaits us.

A kind lady guides us to our seats without looking like she knows who Yoongi is, then offers to get us something to drink, something to eat, which we politely refuse. I don't think my stomach would do well with having food in it when we're about to fly up in the sky for the first time.

Being in here makes everything feel more real, and my nerves pick up in intensity as I observe the staff outside of the plane prepare everything for the long flight. My palms are becoming sweaty, a tell-tale of having to face something new, and my heart squeezes in my throat when the motor soon comes alive with a rumble.

Yoongi, noticing the growing paleness of my skin, buckles me up with ease before doing the same for himself, then makes a move to hold my hand again, uncaring of the sweat that clings to my skin as my fingers begin to shake.

"It's going to be fine. The plane will start off slow in the beginning as we reach the right tracks. That'll take a couple of minutes" he starts explaining as he points somewhere out the window. "Then it'll be very fast so we can take off. The ascent is a bit uncomfortable, you can close your eyes if that helps. I'll be right by your side, holding your hand. Think of Jimin if it gets too much, that's what I do when I'm overwhelmed".

Jimin... that's the sweet man who held me yesterday, when I appeared in his bed. There was something very loving and warm about him as he hugged me tightly, like his touch alone could mend the endless pains out of my reach. I understand why Yoongi would find comfort in thinking about him.

It takes maybe twenty... thirty minutes before the plane begins to move, and I hold in my breath.

"You don't sound nervous. You must be used to it, Yoongi" I mutter weakly. I clench his fingers tightly, feeling ridiculous that this is how I react for my first flight in the sky. I could be brave, why am I not brave? What's this?

So much is happening, from meeting my soulmates to now being in this plane that I can't even find it in me to be depressed like usual. Right now, it's all about survival. Can I stop a plane from crashing mid-air? Will Yoongi drown with me if he can't teleport me elsewhere? Is he that loyal?

"I had to" he answers with a chuckle, seeing in my eyes that my mind is starting to come up with the famous scenarios that come with boarding a plane. "You will too. The sight when you're up there? You'll love it. Just for that, it's worth the hassle".

"I hope so, because right now, this feels just like a nightmare I had a couple months ago. Can a plane float on water?".

He grins, fingers softly patting my hand as he squeezes it tighter.

The plane begins to move faster, and with that, so does my fate.

"We'll find out the answer if it happens".

Great, just great.

Jungkook's POV

Waiting in the car is the most boring thing I've ever done.

No, boring isn't the right word here. I'm straight out of my mind impatient. I want Y/N to be here right now. I feel very selfish for feeling this way, but I wish her ability worked just like Yoongi's. I hate that we had to wait an entire day and night to get her to us.

I hate even more the thought of her having to fly back home eventually. In my mind, her home is here, with us. Can't she stay forever? Does she really have to leave after a week?

"I didn't buy a ticket back to Canada" Namjoon blurts all of a sudden, and five pairs of eyes fall on him with various expressions. "I mean, I can always get her one if she states wanting to go back home, that's not a problem. I can't help but feel like I'm tricking her, though".

"Well... as you said, we can always buy a ticket when she asks for it" Jin mumbles with a hand holding his chin. "We don't know how long she'll want to stay for, or if she'll want to leave at all. Things like handling the matters of her home and her belongings... we can take care of that when the time comes. If anything happens and she really needs to head back, we can always go with her".

Gosh, I love that my soulmates think the same way I do.

"Then we'll have to make her fall in love with us so hard that she won't want to leave at all" I muse with a newfound joy in my voice, something that makes Jimin huff softly, a playful smile on his tasty lips. They taste just like sweet candy.

"You'll have to smile more than that, then. Keep the same face you showed her that night and you're going to scare her into wanting to head back home within the first few days".

I grimace his way before locking my gaze back on the window. It's a good thing that the windows are tinted because there are quite a lot of people at the airport right now even though it's seven in the morning. The flight is meant to last around fifteen hours so they should have landed by now.

A sudden knock on the door at the other side of the car and Hoseok opens it to Yoongi who hurries inside with his hat and mask glued in place, her luggage in hand. Hoseok and Taehyung take it from him and fit it into the trunk from the back seats as a bead of sweat rolls down his temple.

"I was almost spotted by a few fans earlier and had to leave right away" he says as pulls down his mask. "There are too many ARMYs around, someone must have had a vision and gave a hint on social medias. I couldn't risk staying with her, drive to the front of the building, I asked a staff to guide her there since she was getting quite overwhelmed".

Jin, the one driving the van, nods before following his directives while all of us shuffle inside to give Y/N easy access to the seat besides the door that will face the airport. I take place behind her seat, knowing that this is as close as I can be right now, seeing as Jimin is already preparing to have her in his arms as soon as she gets inside.

I can't imagine how she must be feeling right now for him to have such a serious look on his face.

We watch as people come in and out of the huge building in groups, and as soon as Y/N appears with a kind looking lady next to her, Jimin opens the door again to beckon her over. It's a risky move with so many people out and about, but we don't have a choice.

Our soulmate clumsily bows to the lady in thanks before hurrying over inside, door closed behind her right before Jimin's arms find their way around her waist and back to offer the soothing that she needs and more than deserves.

"Breathe, you're alright now" he murmurs in her ear as he hugs her closer into his chest, which is when we notice the slight shivering of her body. Namjoon motions for Jin to drive away when a curious group begins to gather at our car, and off we go.

"The landing wasn't without some turbulence" Yoongi explains as he pats her shoulder softly, now seated next to me at the back. "There were strong winds and we ended up stuck in the middle for a minute of two. Can we head home right away or do we absolutely have to go to the company today?"

I look at Namjoon, eyes urging him to say home. Can't we give her a day to settle before we force her to interact with whoever he's got lined up?

Our leader sighs with a nod of the head, and I calm down immediately. "Home is fine. I'll call Si-hyuk and let him know that she's here with us and to scan the web just in case. I doubt Yoongi's appearance in the airport was entirely unnoticed and we don't know yet if pictures were taken".

Y/N pulls back from Jimin once she starts feeling better, eyes looking from one face to the next until they end on me. I attempt a small smile, which she mirrors softly, exhaustion so strong that I can almost feel it burning the tip of my fingers.

"Didn't you sleep on the way?" I ask as I lean against the back of her seat, head tilted to the side so we can look at one another without hurting our necks. She smells sweet, and I almost bury my nose in her neck out of pure instincts. She smells so good.

"I managed to sleep for an hour or two, but I was too nervous to find it that restful. Yoongi made me listen to some music with his headphones at some point, that helped. I feel like I could crash in bed right now though, I'm sorry".

I shake my head slowly. "Flying in a plane has that effect on people, don't worry. You can use my bed once we're home, you should rest a little. We'll take it easy today for you, you need to adjust to our new timezone after all".

Hoseok smiles from where he's leaning against the window, his back turned to the outside so he can look at her. "Jungkookie has two abilities. One allows him to levitate things and people, while the other allows him to share his energy with others. He's an endless source, so he can transfer some to us whenever we need a boost. Tomorrow, the timezone will not be an issue anymore".

"That's neat" she muses softly, eyes creasing with honest awe. "You don't need to sleep ever, then?"

I chuckle at her adorable question, head shaking. "I'm not a vampire, I do need to sleep just like everyone else. I simply recover much faster than what's considered normal. I need half the amount of sleep to recover just as much energy, so entire nights have me bursting at the seams and ready to go".

"Lucky" she murmurs before yawning for many long seconds, eyes needing an effort to open now that she's safe with us. "I'm always tired. I would love to have so much energy for once".

Jimin pulls her back into a hug, his cheek resting over her head as his arms squeeze her tight. "We'll help you. With us, you'll get regular love, regular meals, regular cuddles. You'll see, sleeping will be much more restful with us than when you were on your own. The bond must have drained a lot of your energy trying to reach out to us for all this time, but you're here now. We'll take care of you".

She hums softly, eyes closing as she melts in his embrace. "That sounds nice" she whispers, only to fall asleep soon after. His pride can be seen all over his face as he moves to take her seat, cradling her over his lap and against his heart with smug satisfaction.

Damn it, I want to take his place so bad!

"She takes my bed at home, you hear me?" I make sure to remind them all before they start fighting on the matter when we already talked about it before leaving this morning. "MY bed".

Hoseok looks at me with a grin, seeing through me way too easily. "Just say that you want her to yourself, Jungkookie. I bet you'll be crawling under the blanket to sleep with her as soon as her back touches the mattress".

"He's going to be creepy and stay awake the entire time, he doesn't even need sleep" Yoongi huffs with a shake of the head.

"Speak for yourself, old man" I grunt. "You slept with her for four hours. Namjoon said that you had her in your arms for three of those!" I bite with a scoff. He makes a move to threaten me with a raised fist, which I respond to with one of my own.

"I was dead asleep for three of those hours, brat. I don't even remember hugging her" he mutters with a deep pout that Taehyung soothes with a kiss. "I can't remember what she felt like in my arms anymore. You don't know the pain until you experience it yourself. It's terrible".

"It's okay, hyung, you'll get to cuddle her again soon" Tae promises softly.

Namjoon and Jin eye me from the front of the vehicle, and I close my mouth to restrain from saying anything annoying. Geez. It's not my fault if he was too exhausted to enjoy it, and it's not my fault if I get in bed with her not to sleep but to hug her, unless she says otherwise, of course. Am I not allowed?

I cross my arms all grumpy, eyes furrowed unhappily and head leaning against the small window, only to have it bump against it here and there when the road is bumpy.

If only one of them tries to keep me from staying by her side, they won't like who I'll become. Oh no.

Jeon Jungkook is not to be messed with when it comes to his cuddle time.

NEXT

YOU BELONG

ALPHA! 0T7 (YOONMIN CENTRIC) X OMEGA!CHUBBY! READER A/B/O - SUGAR DADDY AU

CHAPTER 26 (4.2k words)

For more information about this story, find it here

Your POV

I turn in bed, knots filling my stomach and heart as I rethink over and over again about the fight. Did I perhaps go too far in my accusations? Gosh, I didn’t mean to be so mean. I don’t know what came over me.

I only wanted to let them know that I didn’t like them deciding everything for me, but instead ended up throwing a bucket of simmering anger over their head without warning. Namjoon’s reaction only fuelled that, and I lost sight of myself.

Now… what now? What happens if I’m not within their pack’s protection? Does that mean we can’t spend time together again? Will everything get awkward and stiff between us? Did I ruin everything by trying to speak up my mind?

I sigh deeply, then move out of bed to reach the kitchen, eyes glancing briefly at the time on the oven to find that it’s only three in the morning. I don’t even know if I managed to sleep an hour or two since, my mind unable to stop going over the fight again and again.

I make myself a glass of water and slowly drink it down, knowing very well that sleeping won’t be possible tonight.

Looking over the counter to find the cupcakes I’d made in Bora’s class left untouched makes me feel even worse, and I drop my weight over the counter, glass set aside and head in my hands. I’d made those thinking of the pack.

I foolishly hoped that I could have made them proud by giving them something that I made, to show them that I too could be good in the kitchen, if given the chance. It all sounds so stupid now, that I’m almost embarrassed about it.

None of what I’d hoped for happened, in the end, other than the fact that I indeed made something edible in a kitchen.

Oh well. What happened has happened, and I need to move forward. Today, I’m going outside again. I need to look for a job and that means pushing myself out of my comfort zone a whole lot more than I did yesterday.

I don’t know what kind of job someone like me can get, but I shouldn’t be too picky if I want to earn money. I’ll have to make myself presentable and wear something clean and formal. I don’t know how it’ll go, but unless I try, I’ll never find out.

Nodding to myself as I stand tall again, I move to the bathroom to get showered despite the early hour. Success won’t wait until I’m ready to live normally, so I’ll show my mates that I can be an omega they can be proud of, at all cost.

---

The woman looks me up and down before pursing her lips, a hand to her chin before she shakes her head.

“I’m sorry, you’re not exactly what we’re looking for here. Your makeup looks great, if maybe a little simple. Your clothes are perfect, but the body… our customers won’t feel comfortable if we hire you. Good luck in your search”.

I bite down a bitter remark, then bow before leaving the store. What has my body to do with selling their products? Why would my body shape make people uncomfortable? If anything, it’s their mindset that should make them uncomfortable!

Since I got here, I’ve visited a couple stores that had a job application on the front door. It didn’t look like any of their requirements would get in my way, but what they don’t say is that in the end, it’s not your skills that get you a job, it’s your face.

Or body, in my case. That’s been used a few times to reject me and I’m getting more offended than I am hurt. I look at the time on my phone to find that it’s already nearly ten in the morning, which acts as a bit of a shock to me.

Time went by so fast, I’ve been walking around here for three hours already? How did I not notice? To think that I haven’t found anything yet… how ridiculous. I huff on the sidewalk, then glare back when a human stares at me weird.

It’s possible that my not eating breakfast could have a say in why I feel particularly bothered by every looks I’m given right now, but after all that I heard so far… I don’t really want to eat. I look down at my body, a frown on my face.

I could handle not eating until tonight. Hell, I could probably starve for a whole week and still be fine.

Finding a park nearby, I cross the street before walking to a lone bench beneath a tree, then sit down with a droop to my shoulders. What kind of job can someone like me do that I haven’t attempted yet? Is there even one place out here that would accept me?

What did I do with In-yeop and Dal before my amnesia? I wonder if I could try to get my job back there… I haven’t tried any of the convenience stores either, maybe that would be easier for someone like me. I don’t think they really care who they hire as long as the job is done.

But how is working at a convenience store something my mates would be proud of? Maybe I’m trying to set the bar too high for what I’m able to achieve, but I really don’t want to get their pity by working a job they’d consider… lowly.

Damn it. I did say that I shouldn’t be too picky. I should start by re-evaluating my priorities. What is most important to me? Making my mates proud, or earning money? Priorities, Y/N. You can’t have everything at the same time.

I hear a car slow down behind me then, and I twist my neck slightly to find a police car parking on the side of the road, exactly where I am.

Great. This is just great. Did someone call the cops on me because I sat in the park? Is that forbidden for fat people too? Is there nothing I’m allowed in this city? I’m starting to feel very bitter, I would probably bite someone if given the chance.

Maybe I shouldn’t bite a cop, though.

With my eyes trained on the police car, mind already conjuring the worst scenarios possible, I can only tense up when the door opens to Hoseok the very next second, eyes widening when his gaze falls on me with a tight smile.

His scent of strawberry pie is sweet, though, and I relax a little as he comes over to sit next to me in his work uniform.

“What are you doing here, sweet bun?” he asks with a gentle voice, as if he’s afraid of scaring me off were he to talk a little louder. “I saw you crossing the street from one of the stores looking…” he pinches his lips lightly, “dejected? Angry? Did something happen?”

I look down, fingers twisting together nervously at his question. “It’s my first time seeing you in your work uniform. It looks good on you” I mutter instead of answering him. He just had to go straight to the point, huh? I wasn’t ready to talk about it yet.

He hums, hands patting his pants to adjust some minor detail in the creases.

“Thank you, baby” he murmurs, lips pursing in unease. “Do you need me to drive you anywhere? Can I be of help to you? Or is leaving you alone what you need? I don’t want to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable, I can go if that’s better”.

I unconsciously grab his hand when he makes a move to stand up, and only then does he find out how cold they are. He scoots closer, both of his hands wrapping around mine to warm them up, eyes furrowed in thoughts as he tries to figure out what it is that I need most right now.

I sigh softly, knowing that I’m the one making things difficult at the moment. He just wants to help, there’s no reason for me to push him away.

“I’m sorry, Hobi. I’m just… it’s embarrassing, really. I was out looking for a job, but they keep using my body to refuse hiring me and I don’t know how to feel anymore. I want to make the pack proud, but it seems I keep failing no matter what I do, be it at home or out here”.

Hoseok’s eyes widen, seeing the shame in my eyes now that I’m not hiding it anymore. “They what?” he gasps while looking back at the store with new anger. “Baby, I’m sorry, that’s awful, no one should be treating you like that. How… how long have you felt this way?”

“Soon after I left the hospital, I guess” I admit quietly with a shrug. “At first, I was impressed by how great my mates were, I was proud. I mean, I still am. My mates are amazing and I’m so lucky to have them. I thought… once I’m back home, once things settle after a day or two, I can work hard too, I can be someone just as great, an omega that makes her alphas proud”.

Hoseok’s fingers tighten around mine, eyes downcast as he listens intently.

“My mind keeps telling me that part of doing so is by making you food, but none of you would let me help in the kitchen and… I don’t know. That made me feel like a failure. Like… I don’t know. I have only one spoon at my disposal, and it keeps breaking under my touch. When someone else uses it, it works just fine, but never when I do. I really want to make it work, though”.

“That’s why you signed up for that cooking class” he whispers, only now understanding why I did it. It should’ve been obvious, he saw how pained I was that they kept me out of the kitchen day after day, but he didn’t think it would have affected me that much.

“Maybe it’s linked to the past I can’t remember” I say with another small shrug. “Maybe my wolf has made links where they didn’t need to be made and now I’m stuck that way. Omega equals cooking equals worthy. I don’t know, but until I figure that out, I know that I want to deserve a place in your pack, and I’m just… not there yet”.

Hoseok wants to say so badly that I don’t need to be anything more than who I already am to deserve the pack, but he also understands my need so strongly, because he was the same, once. A young alpha with the desire to make his mates proud, to deserve the pack.

He wouldn’t have become a police chief if it wasn’t for them. Who else was going to protect them from silly laws otherwise? Many would say that such a way of thinking isn’t what a person of his rank should have, he should put the population’s safety first and his pack second, but Hoseok couldn’t do that even if he wanted to.

No, his job is there solely for his mates. He simply doesn’t care if he has to use his power and money to get them out of trouble, not that it would ever be needed. Either way, he understands more than anyone else the need to find a place that will make me belong by their side.

“What do you think will make you feel like you’re finally good enough for us?” he voices out his question after a minute of pondering, to which I hum as I look at the birds in the trees.

“That’s a good question, Hobi. Honestly, I know deep down that no matter what I do, I might never feel like I belong. That sense of belonging isn’t born out of something I own or do, it comes from inside, from here” I say as I tap a hand over my heart.

“I need to believe that I belong, but for now, I feel like I don’t even have the minimum criteria to make it there. That’s why I thought a job could be a nice place to start. That, and being a good cook. I want to see your faces light up when you eat my food. I don’t know where that need comes from, I just know that it’s very strong”.

Hoseok stares at me in silence, then speaks up softly, “Bun… could it be… is it something you feel like you would love doing every day? Not just for the pack or because you have to, but because you truly enjoy making food?”

It doesn’t even require any thinking for me to nod my head. “I think I would. Yesterday, during Bora’s class… you know, it felt good to make something under her guidance and end up with a result that made me happy. I felt accomplished for a moment, it made me want to do so much more”

His eyes blink softly, and a smile melts on his pink lips. “Bun, I think it’s possible that this could be a dream of yours. Just like Jimin dreamed of making clothes, and Jungkook dreamed of making video games. What if your dream is making food?”

I stare at him with round eyes, the words he just spoke sound almost too grand for someone like me and yet… something has never hit home as much as this does. “A dream… that sounds really nice, Hobi” I murmur quietly. “Bora and the others all said that I didn’t like cooking before, but it’s actually very enjoyable. I don’t know yet what I’d do with a dream like that, but I want to try more things, Hobi. I want to find out what I like, what I’m good at doing. No, even if I’m bad at it, I want to get better at the things that matter to me. Do you think it’s possible?”.

Hoseok’s face lights up with pure joy at my words, and he nods quickly, his eyes creasing beautifully. He holds my hands tight, squeezing them to encourage me. “Everything is possible, Y/N. Hearing you say that makes me very happy. Would it be asking for too much, for us to be there as you grow?”

I stare at him, heart twisting as I understand that my speech from yesterday made them believe that I didn’t want them near me at all. That’s not what I’d wanted to convey. It seems yesterday’s conversation wasn’t really understood that well after all, just as I’d feared.

“I would love for you to be there as I grow, Hobi” I muse softly. “Yesterday… I don’t think we understood each other the way we should have. It’s hard to figure things out, not just for me but for all of us. Namjoon was very mad… do you think he’ll want to see me again?” I let out with a worried frown that he’d immediately kiss away had yesterday night not happened.

“Of course Namjoon will want to see you again. You just have to know, bun… we had a talk together yesterday, and we figured out that it was best to not include you in the pack right now. Hear me out first” he says the end before I can counter his statement, a finger gently pressed onto my lips.

“It’s really not as terrible as it sounds. It’s a decision we made to give you time to figure out who you are, and I know how it sounds. We decided something without asking you first, again. We did hear you, though, which is exactly why we made that decision”.

I purse my lips, brows furrowing heavily as I try to not let it hurt me. He sighs deeply, hand patting mine lightly.

“We keep thinking that everything will be fine if we do what we’re used to doing as a pack with you, but that has always ended up going wrong. We thought about it, Y/N. Why does it always go wrong? Then I realized that with us, you have no space to grow. Why would we let you do anything when we can do it for you? Why would seven alphas allow their only omega to struggle when we can keep her in a comfortable nest all the time?”

He releases a dry chuckle then. “It’s restricting, being surrounded by us like that, isn’t it? That’s what we realized, yesterday. We keep you from learning and we justify it by saying that it’s only our way of caring for you. It’s second nature for us to do everything for you. But it’s not what you need, right?”

I sheepishly shake my head to answer him, and he smiles kindly. “This is why we decided to exclude you from the pack for now. By doing so, you’re not expected to listen to pack rules, Y/N. You don’t owe the pack anything, and you can do whatever you want without worry”.

Oh, so that’s why.

“What about you, though?” I ask, knowing that it can’t be that simple. “For me to get my freedom and do things however I want, what does that mean for you? Are you pulling back from being my mates as well?”

His eyes widen. “What? No, not at all. In reality… this is good for all of us, since it gives us time to get to know each other individually as mates. Forming a pack with a new wolf… it’s usually kept at the end of months of courting. We were just too fast” he explains seriously, body facing me and hands holding mine close to his heart.

“Had we done things the right way, we would have slowly gotten to know you. We would have brought you little presents, first scentless, to share our affection with you. Then, after a while, we would’ve brought some scented items like clothes and candles, to let you know that you have a home in us, should you want that. We would’ve asked for permission to scent you, a few days later. Never taking a yes for granted, because you’re to be treasured.

“From time to time, we would’ve taken you out on dates, the seven of us, to show you what it’s like to be loved and cared for by us. To show you what a life by our side could look like every day. We would have mentioned cuddles in a nest to entice you and our hugs would have lasted a little longer, hoping to get your scent on us. Then, and only then, would we have offered you a place in our pack”.

He kisses my knuckles softly. “Any normal pack would have done so from the moment they met you, but we are seven alphas who’ve never had to deal with another second gender intimately. We’re used to going straight to the point because that’s what alphas do”.

He snickers a little. “You’re an omega to seven alphas who don’t know anything about your second gender other than the fact that you need to be protected and loved. That makes for very eager and impatient mates, don’t you think?”

I share his amused smile, feeling a little better already. There’s something about Hoseok that feels like peace, it’s never complicated with him. “Considering that I was particularly traumatised back then… yeah, that does sound like a chaotic mess waiting to happen”.

He chuckles, fingers tender as they caress my cheek.

“Exactly. It seems we’re slow to understand things when it comes to you, and I’m sorry that you had to suffer so much because of us. We’ll do better. That’s why we intend to start over, from square one. We’ll earn your consent, one day at a time. If you say no, we make a step back and wait.

“That means we’ll need you to let us know when you need anything from us. The biggest change you’ll see, bun, is that we will no longer take you for granted. You are an omega to be courted by us, by your mates. Your pace will be our teacher, and your words, our master”.

I breathe in slowly as I process what he’s saying. “That means… you won’t do anything that I haven’t explicitly consented to, right? You won’t seek cuddles, you won’t scent or even stay the night, not unless I ask you to”.

“That’s right” he hums softly, hand still on my cheek and stroking it with love, the only affection he allows himself right now as my mate.

We’ve already cuddled so it’s hard to pretend like this isn’t something we both want, but he also holds so dearly the process that he and the others are attempting to start, which is to do what they should’ve done back then, when Jimin and Yoongi first met me.

“I had that conversation with Jimin, on the day I left the hospital. He’d said that you guys would not initiate anything anymore, that only what I want to happen would happen. I told him that I didn’t want that, that it wasn’t the right way to do things”.

He nods. “I remember. I know why you’re bringing that up, sweet bun. It’s not the same this time. We’re not going to pull back and never initiate anything ever again, it’s just that we’ll do things differently. You don’t have to be scared, we’re not putting all the decisions on you”.

“Yeah… yeah, okay. That’s good, then. I just didn’t want everything to fall on my shoulders, I think that would have been too much for me to deal with” I admit, relief making my next breath easier to take.

“It won’t come to that” Hoseok reassures me, forehead bumping softly against mine as he leans in.

“See it that way, if it helps. We’re now requesting your attention, rather than expecting it. We’re requesting to spend time with you, and if you can’t, we contemplate another day that would work better for you. If I crave cuddles, I will ask you if we can cuddle, the same way that you can ask for company during the night if you’re uncomfortable on your own. We’re not taking everything away from you, that wouldn’t do any good to either one of us”.

“Thank you for taking the time to explain everything to me, Hobi” I murmur, eyes closing to better enjoy this intimate moment. “If you’d only told me that I wasn’t included in the pack anymore without saying why, I would have panicked and expected the worst”.

“Of course” he says softly. “Don’t see what’s happening as a loss but as a gain. We all gain from this”.

He pulls back after giving us a few more seconds, then tucks some strands of hair from my face. “I have to get back to work, baby. Will you be fine here on your own? Are you sure you don’t need me to drive you anywhere?”.

I purse my lips lightly. “I’m not going home until I’ve tried all of the shops around here. I’m sure there ought to be one out there that could be good for me. Maybe I can ask In-yeop or Dal if they know of any places that are hiring”.

He hums softly. “Alright, you do that, baby. Let us know if we can do anything to help, okay? Anything at all”.

“I will” I assure him, now feeling so much better than when I woke up this morning. I feel stronger, more confident. His trust in me and their efforts to give me what I need to grow as well as our bond, it’s pure fuel for the power that feeds my soul.

Before he can stand from the bench, I wrap my arms around him for a tight hug, head resting on his chest where his heart is beating loudly. There is no need for words as his arms hug me back just as strongly. Silence can communicate love just as well.

“You’ve got this, baby. Show them who you are, and make them regret not hiring you if they ever turn you down” he encourages. “Don’t forget that your mate is a police chief. I’m here to take you out of jail if you ever make it there, but you have to make it count. Don’t go down without giving one heck of a good punch in the face, otherwise I’m leaving you there”.

I giggle against his shoulder. “Hobi! You shouldn’t abuse of your power like that!”

He grins. “Oh but baby, that’s precisely why I gained this power. To protect my mates”.

He pats my back before standing up. “And time is ticking. Give me a call if someone’s giving you trouble, I’ll be there in a flash” he says with a wave of the hand as he hurries back to the car, leaving me right where I was in the first place, but feeling so much better.

I hum to myself, then raise my fists at my sides in an encouraging manner. I’ve got this.

I’ll say though, asking my friends for help is a very good idea, I don’t know why I didn’t think of asking them sooner. Grabbing my phone, I make a group chat with the three of them before typing in my current situation. Hopefully that gets me somewhere.

NEXT

YOU BELONG

ALPHA! 0T7 (YOONMIN CENTRIC) X OMEGA!CHUBBY! READER A/B/O - SUGAR DADDY AU

CHAPTER 25 (4.5k words)

For more information about this story, find it here

Angst! Angst! Angst! Angst!

I'm sat in the living room, not a single sound echoing in the silent room other than my own slow breathing when the others begin to come back from work. They'd promised to end their work shift at the same time, and they stayed true to their words.

Whether they're happy about it or not remains to be seen.

They can feel the tension as they remove their shoes, eyes glancing at one another when they notice that I'm not moving a muscle to so much as glimpse at them as they shuffle closer. It's clear that I'm not happy, and they have not a single clue what happened to put me in that mood.

My whipped cream scent is strong, scarily so. As if the softness has hardened after going through much hardship. It's their first time witnessing that side of me. It's the scent of anger, and not the harmless kind

One after the other, they come to sit in the living room, eyes on my unblinking state as I keep staring at the wall in front of me, not willing to give them the relief of a smile just yet. I'm still mad just thinking about what they kept from me, and I intend to let them feel that anger.

When Namjoon and Yoongi are last to arrive, the pack alpha frowns at the tensed silence that greets him, eyes shifting between my lonesome form on the couch while the others all huddle on the same one like a group of scared puppies.

"Y/N?" he asks as he and Yoongi join us in the living room. The latter dares to sit next to me on the same couch, but even he can feel that it's best to not stay too close right now. Namjoon, on the other hand, stands before me, eyes on the lookout for anything weird while his mind works a mile an hour trying to figure out what happened. "Is something wrong, sugar?".

I bristle at the question, and his eyes widen slightly at the change it brings to my scent. Has my whipped cream become spiky, or has it turned poisonous?

"You're really asking me that, Namjoon? You of all people should know, but I'll tell you if something's wrong. Yes. Yes, there's something very wrong actually, and you ought to answer my next question very carefully" I start with a harsh tone that startles Taehyung and Jungkook, who both cuddle closer into Hoseok's safe arms.

Omega not happy. Omega mad mad.

The pack alpha's stance hardens, brows furrowing at my tone of voice. It's not often that someone talks to him this way, and it being from an omega - granted, his omega - isn't anything to please the wolf in him. Disrespect, his wolf says. Omega needs to respect pack alpha, needs to submit.

He swallows a growl in the back of his throat, fighting hard against his instincts. "I'm listening".

I inhale deeply, eyes shutting briefly to try and calm down, as hard as it is. It's like a fire burning in me, a fire that's so strong and hot that everything it touches turns to lava. The ground at my feet is melting, but instead of hurting me, it's feeding the anger that floods through me, my wolf pacing and feeding on that anger. What were they thinking?

"I went outside today" I start, eyes taking in their reaction very closely. They tense, eyes twitching, scents wavering. "I signed up for a cooking class since none of you want to teach me anything. I took the bus and went downtown. There, surprisingly, I met two old friends. Bora and In-yeop, who both told me the same thing. You're not supposed to be here, Y/N".

Namjoon's stare is sharp as he stares at me with an unreadable look on his face. "You went outside on your own? Without letting us know?".

I huff out a dry laugh at his question. "Why? Am I supposed to ask for your permission? Is this a prison? Wasn't this house meant to bring me closer to you and nothing else? Do I fall under your rule just because I'm amnesiac? Because I'm an omega?".

A growl slips past Namjoon's throat this time, and eyes turn wary, Yoongi, Hoseok and Jin tensing up with their posture ready to take action at the smallest sign of aggressiveness from either one of us. They're taking for granted that anything is possible at the moment.

"You should have let us know" the pack alpha states firmly, body simmering with a growing heat that I can feel even from a distance. "You do not fall under our rule, but you are under our protection. What if something happened to you out there? We-"

"I'm not a child, Namjoon!" I cut him off, hands hitting the air as I stare at him, exasperated. "I forgot about my past, but that does not make me an imbecile, nor does it make me incapable of caring for myself. For fuck's sake, you didn't even tell me about my friends! In-yeop apparently called Hoseok nearly every day to hear about me and I didn't even know!".

Hoseok's eyes turn guilty at my outburst and Jin caresses his side softly, eyes furrowed on me. He understands the anger, even if it's not fun to hear, the words raw with anger, yes, but also insecurities. They all understand. What makes this conversation risky is the fact that I'm screaming at a pack alpha.

Namjoon's reaction to such disrespect is beyond his control, this is a matter that affects his wolf directly, and they've never been confronted to such a situation until now. The outcome of this conversation is unpredictable in a very uncomfortable way.

The alpha clenches his fists at his side, eyes darkening. His pheromones are turning thick and heavy, controlling, and it takes everything in me to not flinch and cower in front of him. My own wolf is too mad to bend its neck, and so we stay strong.

"You are under our protection" he repeats roughly, his dominant wolf slowly surfacing in the way he sounds. "You do not get to do as you please when it affects the entire pack. We're all worried about you, leaving you alone today was already hard enough, so knowing that you went out without one of us with you is unacceptable. You-" "Namjoon!" I cut him off again, body jumping on my feet to stand in front of him, even though he towers over me, even if my legs are shaking.

I point at myself, finger pushing against my heart. "I am an adult. Beyond being an omega who has gone through struggles, I am a living being with needs, thoughts and emotions. I sought to learn something good for myself, and I felt proud while doing so! I went out on my own, I was brave and faced the world head on, but here you are, trying to make me feel guilty for doing so without you! Hear yourself for a bit!".

He stares down at me with something akin to rage in his dark eyes. "I'm not saying you can't do something good for yourself, I'm saying that you should have told us. You should have let one of us accompany you".

"Yeah. The same way you accompany someone senile, because you can't trust that I can care for myself" I bite back bitterly.

"You still have that image of the past me, Namjoon. You are not seeing me as I am now. I long to discover who I am, to find goals and things which I will be proud of. Staying locked at home is not doing that for me, and having you follow me like a shadow would not help either. I need to be independent and not depend on you for every stupid need I have, can't you understand that?".

We glare at one another for a long while, the others staring in the uncomfortable suspense.

"I want a job" I continue, now on a sinking wave that I can't get off. "I want to spend time with friends, and do things on my own when I want to. I don't want to ask for permission for the rest of my life. I thought you would've encouraged me to try, Namjoon. You were supposed to encourage me to go out there and achieve things for myself, not hold me back like a mindless alpha. This goes for each and everyone one of you" I add to the rest of the pack's intention.

"We never meant to force you to ask for permission forever, Y/N, especially not to hold you back" Jimin steps in before this degenerates into something worse, our emotions now doing the talking for us. Rationality is not within our reach anymore. "Our alpha wolves are overprotective, they're only trying to make sure everything is safe for you. All we wanted was to-".

The feeling of not being understood clashes heavily with my anger, and I groan loudly in my hands. "I don't care about that, Jimin! Fuck! That's not the point of this conversation!" I exclaim, feeling powerless in front of their strong pheromones.

How can an omega dare to face seven alphas? But if I don't, who will do it for me?

"I'm telling you that I hate having you take decisions like this without talking about it with me first. You decided that I was to stay home for the time being. You decided that I was to be accompanied everywhere I go. You decided to keep people that care about me from me. Not once did you ask me for how I felt, or what I wanted concerning my re-adjusting to life. You simply took for granted that I would go along with your decisions".

The ambiance is heavy, suffocating as they process my words with a blank face. Their lips are pressed tight, corners curled downward. Eyebrows are fixed in place, meant to keep them from furrowing too deeply. Eyes still as stone, each of them on various corners of the room.

"You were afraid that I was going to find you overwhelming" I continue, breath now shaking, shoulders heaving and legs trembling. I can't back down now, not after all this. It's too late to give up on speaking my mind.

"At first, you wanted to give me space because you feared I would find you overbearing. I decided at that moment that I wanted you close. That I didn't want to spend my days alone, that I didn't want to sleep on my own. But this morning, you all left, and I felt fine. I was happy that I felt fine because it meant I was getting more confident, more comfortable. Now, you're getting mad because I didn't need you for my first outing. Well, I'm telling you. This, I find overbearing. I can't build everything I do around you. I don't want to, and you shouldn't either".

The alphas' hearts clench and squeeze at my words, painfully so. Namjoon brings his gaze back to me, his pain now visible to my eyes.

"A pack is about taking care of each other. It's all about building our life and actions around each other. If you're not ready for that, fine. But you don't get to decide that for us. I see now that our concerns for you went too far and that we shouldn't have cared so much. You don't want us to care about your safety? Then we won't. You want to go out on your own? Go out there on your own. You want to behave like a packless omega, so go ahead and do as you want" he says with a rough edge to his voice, like it's slowly getting stuck in his throat.

"From now on, I retract my responsibility as your pack alpha until you ask for it of your own free will. That's what you wanted, right? Well, there you go". With that said, he rushes to the entrance, wears his shoes without a single look back before exiting the house, leaving me feeling shattered and lost.

Jungkook, Taehyung and Jin follow after him with a swear past their lips, while Hoseok, Jimin and Yoongi stay behind, exactly where they are.

Every breaths I take are painful as my chest heaves, heart squeezing and soul aching, my wolf whimpering and howling in my head. My eyes brim with tears, a feeling of abandonment filling my entire body. Stupid pack alpha.

Hoseok slowly comes closer, wanting to comfort me the only way he knows, but I step back instinctively when he tries to hug me, not finding it in me to accept anyone's touch after the fight I just had with Namjoon. I can barely tolerate the feeling of my own skin right now.

"I want to be alone. Please leave" I whisper after a moment of heavy silence, eyes on the floor as the three alphas share a worried glance, none of them liking this. They don't want to leave, but they can also see that insisting to stay would only prove me right, and that's the last thing they want.

"Alright. We'll leave you on your own, sweets" Yoongi speaks first as he finally stands. "Please know that Namjoon didn't mean what he said about retracting his responsibility as your pack alpha. He will act on his words, though, if only by respect for you. Until you ask for him yourself".

My jaw clenches, and I keep staring at the floor as the three of them leave my house. Jimin almost caresses my cheek on the way, but Hoseok pulls him away with a slow shake of the head. Not a good idea, not now.

The door closes on them, and I remain standing in the living room for what feels like an eternity, emotions locking themselves into a cage nestled above my heart, out of reach by fear of hurting too much.

Namjoon's POV

I slam the door behind me as I reach home, barely aware that it opens again behind me shortly after. Shoes kicked against the wall before I stride towards the training room in the basement to spend that anger on something other than my mates.

Omega rejected pack. Omega not ready for pack. Omega scared.

Those words are on a loop in my mind. This world is new for her, in every sense of the word. She forgot over twenty years of her life. Every memories, every experiences, every hurts, but also every joys.

She's trying to discover that life all over again, clinging onto that wish with her whole being. She's pushing against her own limits and fears to build herself up again, and that liberty means everything to her. In her eyes, our care tried to go against that freedom.

I get that. I really fucking do, but it also really fucking hurts.

I reacted with my instincts, with my emotions. I said something really fucking stupid earlier, but it's also the right thing to do, no?

From the moment she woke up, we were there. She has not known what it feels like to be on her own, to feel the need for a pack. She just had one, right there and waiting for her. An overbearing pack too eager to protect and right its wrongs.

I let all my anger and sorrow out on the gym equipment. I punch, I push, I run. I groan, shout, cry, and sweat.

Until she realizes that a pack is meant to empower each other, to bring that sense of safety and care, that unwavering loyalty, she will never be ready for one. She will have us as her mates, always, but pack is much bigger than the concept of a soulmate. It's weaving intimacy and home into one another, every threads braided together to form something strong and indestructible.

If your thread is loose, you lose your shape in the intricate design. You can't just fit into the pattern by force, nor can you be forced to fit inside, to weave in every other threads as tightly as the first. You have to want it, you have to make the effort, even when it's hard and complicated.

So until she wants to try, I will not push the weight of pack onto her shoulders. The problem with that is that I am pack alpha. It is a concept intricately weaved into my entire soul. I cannot be her mate and not be her pack alpha. One goes with the other, so how do I make that work? How do I belong to her without forcing her to belong to me just as deeply?

I throw one last punch at the punching bag, then rest my sweaty forehead against the hard surface, panting and breathless. Will she even want to see me again? What if I fucked things up for myself? I was supposed to sleep with her tonight, with Hoseok and Jungkook, but I guess that's ruined.

The soft sensation of a towel over my skin, and a kiss presses onto my shoulder. Jungkook's scent of hazelnuts spreads around me as he hugs me from the back, not seeming to care that my sweat clings to him from my drenched shirt.

"She's learning to speak up for herself" he voices softly, the sound soothing in the large empty room. "She's only now learning about her boundaries. She might confuse them with her fears from time to time, but that doesn't lower their importance. You know that, right?".

I breathe in deeply, his scent and pheromones helping me to calm down slightly, at least enough so that I can turn around and wrap my arms around him, pulling him in my embrace. It feels good to hug a mate, someone who has built that pack with me, someone whose pattern fits mine perfectly.

"I know, Jungkook-ah, I know" I answer softly. He's right, just like always when it comes to her.

We remain like that for a long time, in each other's arms, until the sweat that dries on my skin makes me feel cold and sticky, uncomfortable. I pull back then, eyes looking him over to see that I put him in a similar state. I purse my lips tightly.

"Let's go take a shower. You're all gross because of me" I let out weakly, voice raspy because of how much I used my voice while training. I've never been one to raise my voice, and I never would do so against my omega, but I can't lie and say that it didn't require a tremendous effort from me.

"Hyung" Jungkook says as I make a move to detach myself from him, his pretty eyes filled with worry. "We'll get through this. Y/N loves this pack, she loves us, she loves you. She just needs time".

I smile lightly, then kiss the top of his head at his small reassurance.

He doesn't need to be so worried, I don't intend to cast her aside so easily. Whether she wants to or not, she's one of my mates, now. The Moon Goddess made us her second chance mates for a reason and I intend to fulfill that responsibility, one day at a time.

"Come, let's go take that shower".

---

"What do we do about her?" Taehyung asks once we're all sat in the living room for a conversation that cannot wait any longer. We took some time to recover from what she'd said, then met up here. "We're not seriously pulling back from her, are we? We're not keeping the pack from her? Hyung?"

I shake my head at his question, hand rubbing his back softly from where he's sat next to me.

"No, pup. We're not keeping the pack from her, but we are giving her a break from it. She's not ready for its implications, it appears she's going to see it as a... prison more than anything if we demand for her cooperation. I thought about it and for now, I think it's better if we remain as her mates only. Only then can we support her the way she needs. Otherwise, it's going to be hard to see her going all over the place on her own, without ever asking for our help".

"That makes sense" Jin mutters as he bites on his bottom lip, arms crossed over his chest, "but I don't like it. She could feel like we're avoiding her, or that we're mad at her. There's got to be a better way than that".

"I'm all ears, if anyone has a better idea" I say with a sigh, eyes looking at each of them to see a similar expression on their faces.

"We should at least tell her about this plan" Yoongi says from where he's sat with Jimin, their fingers intertwined. "I don't want a repeat of last time. Not telling her about the pack back then was a very risky move, and had it not been for Jungkook, things could've gone so much worse. I don't want to do something similar again, we should explain why you told her that".

Jungkook nods, clearly on the same page as our older mate. He stares me right in the eyes, something in them that reminds me of my younger self. The kind of eyes that tell you everything is possible, and that everything will be well.

"I think the same. We have to make her understand the nuance between us being her mates and us being her pack. There's honestly really not much that changes for now, other than the fact that she won't be considered a member of the pack until she wants to be part of it. She has to know that it only means she won't fall under the pack's rules".

I observe as they start to nod their head slowly, Jin being the last. His eyes, on the contrary, show me that he's very worried. He doesn't like keeping her out of the pack, but there is also no better options at the moment.

I clear my throat to get their attention again.

"As Jungkook said, the only impact I can see out of this is that the regular pack rules won't apply to her. Honestly, I'll probably be the one to struggle the most, but you guys should be fine. I know we all allowed ourselves to treat her like she was pack from the very beginning, but until we know better, we'll have to change our ways with her" I start, very serious as I hold their gaze.

"That means no pheromones forced on her unless she asks for it, including scenting her. Nothing that leaves our scent behind and claims her as ours without her consent. We're giving her full reigns over what she's ready to receive from us from now on. We can offer those things when we believe that she needs them. Courting her with gifts... it will really depend on how comfortable she is with that, so I would wait before doing anything too intense for now".

Jimin looks down, all dejected at those words, as do Taehyung, Jin and Hoseok. Part of their love language is giving presents to their mates, it's in their nature. They hadn't really been given the opportunity to gift her anything yet and I know they'd been planning, so to have that be put on hold isn't easy to hear.

I understand their pain, it won't be easy for us to try and figure out the best way to act with her, but I want to make sure she knows that we're ready to try. To follow her pace, for real this time. I want her to know that we're not going to get in her way, that we respect her freedom.

"I know it sounds awful, said like this" I continue despite our shared discomfort. "But I'm not keeping you from doing what you believe is right as her mate. I simply ask that you do not speak for the pack when you do it. We'll adjust, we have to. It'll give her the time and space she requires to get to know herself better. It's so easy to lose one's self in a big pack like ours after all".

Yoongi looks at the others and offers an encouraging smile.

"It's going to be fine, guys. This is a very good opportunity for us to show her who we are. Individually, I mean. We can get to know her likes and dislikes, her new boundaries as we go, and we can share our discoveries together at the end of the day. You know, what we would have done from the very beginning, were we not so reckless and in a hurry".

"Yoongi is right" Jimin adds with renewed confidence. "We were reckless because we found her life to be miserable and acted too quickly, I know I did. I wanted her to have a better everything, but in doing so, I forced changes on her that she never asked for. Now... we can take our time. She has everything she needs, there's no hurry to be had anymore".

A weight falls from over my chest as I watch them approve of the new plan one after the other, a hopeful smile settling over my lips as their scents clear up and turn more confident.

"We only wanted to keep her from getting hurt, from getting overwhelmed, but maybe... part of her learning about who she is requires that those things happen" Hoseok adds softly. "If she tries things and finds out that it's too hard on her own, we'll be there for her. But if she succeeds, we need to be proud of her and not make her feel bad because it happened without us".

I express my approval with a sheepish nod of the head. The words I told her... they were so very selfish, and I can't even blame everything on my wolf. I sincerely believed what I said, even though that wasn't what she needed to hear. I only thought about what I wanted for myself as her alpha. I will need to do better too.

"Let's have dinner, then. We can't go to sleep on an empty stomach if we want to make amends. We'll have hard work before us starting tomorrow" Jin says after standing with a pleased hum.

"I hope she'll eat something too" Taehyung murmurs sadly, in doing so speaking the very worry that we all gained at the mention of food. Will she eat on her own despite the fight we had tonight, or will she starve herself?

"We adapt" Jin reminds us. "Let's not cross boundaries again. If she needs us, she'll have to learn to reach out and let us know in what ways we can help her. Until then, we watch, we learn, and we adapt. One day at a time. For now, a starving pack won't be good for anyone".

I nod, then help Taehyung to his feet before guiding him to the table. Jin is right. One day at a time. For now, we eat.

NEXT

When Eight Becomes Nine - Chapter Eleven

I may have taken my sweet time writing this, but in my defense, the Felix smut was what my brain wanted to write first, and then life got to me and made me really busy. And here I am, finishing this fic at 3am in the morning lol. But have fun with the chaos of this fic hehe.

Pairing: Ateez x 9th member!reader  Summary: We see the aftermath and chaos of the company's decision, plus y/n gets some much needed comfort. Oh, and a reveal! wc: 1.8k AU: a/b/o  Genre: Fluff/Angst  warnings: fighting and slapping, threats, angst, slut-shaming and derogatory talk towards y/n, use of the words slut,pussy, whore, etc., lots of misogyny in this chapter folks, and a bunch of like derogatory talk about omegas that is absolutely misogynistic and sexist, lots of cursing, implications that people would take advantage of others, disassociating kinda, shitty people being called the names they deserve, this should be everything masterlist

The fighting went on, it seemingly would never end as insults and angry words kept being thrown back and forth. Ateez and their management yelled back and forth over who had the decision making power over the new member, and for the most part, the auditionees just watched it all happen. What could they do? Nothing. They were just the pawns in the game, really, if one thought about it.

“You said we could have the ability to pick the final member out of that group! We don’t want anyone but y/n!” Wooyoung yelled, getting in the face of one of the staff members, having to be pulled away by Mingi and Yunho.

“I will take all of my members, and we’ll leave KQ, if you continue to insist on your pick for the ninth member. I am not above leaving. We,” Hongjoong said as he gestured to the rest of Ateez, “are not above leaving. I don’t think you want to test how far you can push us before we push back.” He said, his words a thinly veiled threat.

“Who would take you? They don’t want an established group.” The staff member who started all of this stated.

“I can think of a few companies who would gladly take us. You forget we’re a group that has a very large international audience, which is what companies want nowadays.” Hongjoong said, almost too calmly.

“We’ll leave, take everything we can with us, and we’ll go start somewhere else. Atiny will follow us, they like us, not you.” Hongjoong spelled it out for the staff members, who quickly realized that they might want to back down on this.

“God, is your pussy really that great that they’ll go to bat for you like this? Well, I guess a slut like you knows how to please, honestly that’s all omega’s are good for, anyways. Just a quick fuck, nothing more.” She heard the voice speak again, and this time it was louder, since she saw some of the other auditionees’ heads turn. She would have turned to look at who it was, but she couldn’t take her eyes off of the idols across the table.

It was apparent to the others, though not to the y/n nor the person behind her, that not only had the other auditionees’ heard those words, but so had a member of the group. Before anyone could process the idol’s actions, Jongho had launched himself across the room and tackled whoever had been sitting behind her, the two landing on the floor with a thump. This stopped any fighting in its tracks.

“You want to say that again?” Jongho growled as he pinned the other person to the floor, teeth bared.

“Y-You heard me.” They said, a stutter appearing as they tried to mask any fear of the beta on top of them.

“I would bet that you’re also the person who leaked those pictures to Dispatch. Since you’re so intent on being jealous that you weren’t picked.” The maknae idol deduced.

“And if I did? What are you going to do about it?” They taunted him, somehow overcoming their fear.

“Jongho, get off of him. Now.” Hongjoong ordered, moving over to where the maknae was.

“No.”

“Jongho, now.”

“He was telling lies to y/n. Telling her that she and omegas were only good for a quick fuck, and that we were only fighting for her because she was good in bed. His words were more vulgar, and I won’t repeat them.” Jongho said, never looking away from the target of his rage.

“It’s not a lie. Omegas are only good for fucking, that’s it. That’s their purpose in life, is to be good little broodmares for betas and alphas. Besides, what talent does she have, she’s barely done anything while we’ve been here, and has only monopolized the attention of all of you.” They spat out, glaring over at y/n before their view of her was replaced with Mingi.

Hongjoong turned to look at the staff and managers with a murderous look on his face. They really wanted someone like this, to become part of Ateez? “You wanted a disgusting piece of shit like this, to become a member of Ateez? Someone who will look down on his fellow members because of their subgender? You were going to let someone like this interact with Atiny, and based on his words, probably abuse power as an idol to take advantage of them?” He raged, his voice becoming increasingly louder until he was shouting at them.

The staff tried to stammer out excuses, claiming they knew nothing of the beta’s opinions. It was clear to everyone that none of the idols believed the words coming out of their managers’ mouths, though to his credit, their main manager didn’t say anything, just sat down and stayed quiet while the others talked out of their asses. In return for his silence, he received disappointed looks from the eight idols, half of whom were still filled with rage against the beta and the others.

Wooyoung rushed over to y/n’s side once the shock and anger of the situation was pushed aside in favor of concern for his omega baby. Placing his hands on her shoulders to turn her to face him, as she still spaced out.

“Baby omega, c’mon come look at me,” he pleaded. “It’s okay, so come back to me, to us.”

His words, plus his scent of flowers and cinnamon turning slightly burnt as he worried, brought y/n back to the present. She looked over at the other omega, whose face was filled with worry.

“Wooyoung-ssi?” She asked, still a bit dazed from her intense focus on what was now just an empty spot in the room.

“Hi baby omega, how are you feeling?” He asked her, as the others looked over at the two of them.

“God, I knew it from the moment that the hag of an omega dragged you away, that you were an attention whore.” The beta cut in, making everyone’s heads’ snap to him.

Y/n’s face dropped as she realized who exactly said that, but she couldn’t get a word in before the sound of a slap rang out. Mingi had stepped forward, kneeling down and slapping the beta’s cheek so hard that a bruise had already started to form.

“Aaron, why are you like this? You were so nice to me.” Y/n asked, confused.

“Because you’ve done nothing to deserve anything you’ve gotten here. I’ve worked my ass off for years, and I’ve been passed over in favor of omegas. Because of your kind, I can’t get anything, omegas are always the ones chosen for things, never betas. I deserve this. I’m way more talented than you are, and I’m not a fucking whore who sleeps her way into the team. I don’t monopolize Ateez’s attention, not like you have. You got private sessions with San and Yunho, I saw it. And fuck it was amazing to see how much hate you’re still getting for it. You should just go back home, y’know, and be the little omega housewife, because that’s all you’re good for.” Aaron goes off on a rant, inadvertently revealing that he was the one that leaked the photos to Dispatch.

The anger in the room was palpable, and y/n wasn’t the only one to shrink in on herself because of it. Wooyoung held her tighter, his arms snaking around her to pull her closer, as the two of them watched the others crowd around the three on the floor, as they noticed that the staff ushered the other auditionees out of the conference room.

“So, you’re the one who put my members’ careers at risk, and put them in the middle of a scandal? You’re the one who made my members worried and stressed because you’re jealous that another person, that wasn’t you, caught our eye? Y’know, it's fitting that it’s you. You look as pathetic as you actually are. Only someone who knows they’re inadequate stoops so low as to bring others down to their level. You’re passed over in favor of omegas, because they’re obviously better than you. And y/n is one of those omegas.” Hongjoong said, his words filled with condescension towards Aaron. “Say goodbye to any chance of making it in the industry, here or back home. Word gets around about bad people.” The captain finished.

Seonghwa turned to the staff that remained in the room. “If you don’t get security here within the next few minutes, and make sure he’s escorted back to his room so he can pack up and then driven to the airport to fly back to whatever dump he’s from, we will take it into our hands. I don’t think you want the media, or Atiny, knowing that you were going to let someone who tried to ruin two members of Ateez, into the group. Nor will the police be happy if they find out that they were deceived, if any of you knew about what he had done, to not only San and Yunho, but to an innocent person in all of this.”

Yeosang, normally not one to be overly touchy feely when things are stressful, moved over to Wooyoung and y/n, in need of comfort from his omega friend. Wooyoung immediately noticed and pulled the alpha close, the now trio taking comfort in one another. The two men silently communicated, both hoping that management would fail in the task given to them, so that the stain on the floor would be dragged out by police instead. They were disappointed when security rushed into the room, and once Jongho had pulled away from the beta, the team of security guards led the disgraced auditionee out of the conference room, and away from the lives of the now nine members of Ateez.

Hongjoong was quick to collect the rest of the group, including y/n, and bid goodbye to the staff members, not sparing them another glace as he led his group out into the hallway. Y/n was pushed into the middle of their protective circle, with Seonghwa and Wooyoung on either side, and Mingi behind the trio to bring up the rear as the others surrounded the trio of omegas. The group of nine were led to the practice room, as it was the easiest and quickest place to regroup.

Once everyone was settled in the room, most sprawled out on the floor, including y/n whose head was laid in Yeosang’s lap as the man ran his hands through her hair, silence settled over the group as everyone processed what had just occurred. That silence lasted until the youngest omega shot up, almost hitting Yeosang’s chin, as she realized exactly what the group had been fighting for in the first place.

“Wait. You want me to be the ninth member of Ateez?!” She shouted out, in complete shock.

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Finally at Peace (19)

Summary: Y/n spends her day hanging out with the hybrids, from gardening, to watching documentaries, and star gazing at night. But despite how much they've all settled into their new house, why cant she sleep peacefully?

Word count: 5k

Warnings: Mentions of abandonment, Let me know if I missed any!

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I laughed hard as chunks of dirt splattered onto Namjoon's face from Jin’s shovel. The expression he gave made it so much better and I lost my balance tumbling back slightly, my bottom firmly seated on the ground now. Jin turned to the younger man and began laughing at him, his laugh sounded similar to a horse’s ‘neigh’ and that made it all the more funnier.

Namjoon begrudgingly flicked the dirt from his shirt and then wiped it off his face whilst giving it a death glare. I kept laughing as I stomped and kicked my feet lightly on the ground below me. The three of us had been trying to fix up the garden bed so when spring rolled around, we could plant flowers and things. So far it had been going well, mostly clearing stuff out and pulling out weeds, which Namjoon had been holding onto.

“Seriously?” Namjoon asked as he kept trying to get more dirt off his face with the same hand that was holding the dirt cover weeds, resulting in a much larger smudge to appear on his left cheek. Jin couldn't stop laughing and looked away from the younger man. I snorted again before twisting myself around so I could sit on my knees. I reached for Namjoon’s face with the bottom of my shirt wrapped around my hand. I did my best to wipe most of it off his face.

“Good as new.” I smiled at him before grabbing my shovel again. 

We stayed outside for a little longer until we had decided that it was getting too cold to stay outside and we retired indoors where it was much warmer. Sighing, as I already felt much cleaner in a new shirt and jumper that weren't covered in cold dirt, I hopped down the stairs and into the kitchen where I began making myself a mug of hot chocolate.

I slowly stirred the drink, mixing all the ingredients with the hot water. I watched as the small bubbles began to circulate around the teaspoon. Suddenly, I felt two arms snake their way around the sides and my waist, resting on my abdomen, I jumped at the sudden contact, not even hearing them walk up behind me. They rested their chin on my shoulder and let out a breathy chuckle as my heart was racing, remembering I was safe, I tried to slow my racing heart.

I turned around to face the sneaky hybrid, Jimin gave me a sweet but smug smile and I sighed as I shook my head slightly, a goofy smile plastered on my face as I went back to peacefully stirring my drink. I made small talk with Jimin as he refused to leave me alone, clinging to my back like a baby koala. I had to waddle into the living room while being careful to not spill my drink. I plopped myself down onto the couch, Jimin went to sit down, but at the last minute changed his mind and sat over with Yoongi. I smiled at the 2 of them as they sat together on the couch watching the show on the TV.

I watched with them for a long while before Jimin got up and decided to do something else. I watched as he reluctantly left Yoongi’s embrace. I smiled at the two of them.

“Something wrong?” 

I blinked a few times as I registered the fact that Yoongi was asking me a question.

“Nope! Just a bit cold.” I responded, I wasn't exactly lying as that was the reason that I was cold, but that wasn't the reason I was looking over at him. I watched curiously as he fiddled with the blanket that was loosely covering his legs.

“Come here.” He said as he spread out the blanket more.

“Oh, no it's okay-”

“Don't be stubborn.” He interrupted me, cutting me off with a smile on his face. I smiled to myself as I got up from where I was on the couch and walked over to where he was. I sat next to him as he spread the blanket over me. I pulled it up to my shoulders before I leaned on him as we watched the tv,

“You humans are always so cold.” He chuckled. I smiled at his words.

“Good thing I have 7 different heaters then, right?” I joked as we kept watching the show on the tv whilst sitting really close to each other. I could feel his natural hybrid body heat warming me up and I snuggled in further to him, enjoying how much warmer I was feeling. Yoongi chuckled as he wrapped an arm around me loosely.

At some point in the later evening, I had found myself wandering around looking for something to do or some company, as I walked up the stairs I spotted one of the doors open, I knocked 3 times before poking my head around the corner to see inside. There was a desk with a chair across from the door, covering the left wall and next to the door was a couch with a small coffee table in the centre, the other side was left more open without a carpet on the floor either. The chair turned around to face the door and Hobi smiled at me and beckoned me to come inside, I walked in and closed the door behind me.

I turned to sit on the couch and saw that Namjoon was sitting down too. I gave him a quick smile before I took a seat on the couch. I sat with the 2 of them and chatted for a while. Noticing how much warmer it was in here I decided to take off my jumper, I pulled it over my head, and I quickly fixed my hair before roughly folding the jumper and putting it down on the unused coffee table.

“Are you wearing my shirt?”

I looked up at Hoseok as he scanned the shirt I was wearing, I looked down at the shirt, pulling at the bottom to see it clearly. It was definitely not mine, but I wasn't sure exactly whose it was.

“I've been looking for that shirt…” He mumbled as he confirmed it was his. I felt a mix of emotions, but I couldn't ignore the fact that I was wearing his shirt, one he had been looking for.

“O-Oh, sorry. I'll go change and give it back.” I stuttered out as I went to stand up so I could go change and give him back his shirt that I had been wearing for most of the day. I felt a bit guilty about it, but I also couldn't ignore the butterflies in my stomach.

“No, it's okay. You look cute in my shirt.” he said with a knowing smile as he looked at me, making eye contact. “You can keep it.” The small amount of guilt I had completely dissipated as my stomach bloomed into its own spring, butterflies, flowers, blossoms, everything, I could feel my face heat up and I started to relax back into the couch a little more, I mumbled a quiet thanks before feeling completely incapable of talking.

Hobi chuckled and looked over to Namjoon as they spoke about something, I was too in my own thoughts to understand what it was.

Coming back to reality I tuned into their conversation, hearing them talk about the other pack mates reminded me of a question that I had been meaning to ask. I waited until they had finished their current back and forth to ask my question

“Jimin and Yoongi are quite close, aren't they?” I asked the two hybrids, Namjoon looked towards me and glanced back at Hobi who had turned his chair to face between me and Namjoon while he looked at me.

“Yeah, they are. They've known each other the longest so it makes sense how close they are.” He said whilst he seemed to do some quick maths in his head.

I hummed in understanding, but I didn't really understand. I have more questions now. I wasn't sure if I should push the topic further, but they didn't seem nervous or unwilling to answer my questions, so I pushed forward. “Really? They knew each other before the rest of you?”

Namjoon nodded. “Yeah, before we were all together, they had each other.” He explained. “They used to stay with this nice old man. I don't remember his name.” Namjoon looked towards Hobi to help him out with what he wasn't remembering, Hobi hummed before speaking.

“I don't think they told us? But yeah, they lived with that man for a long time. We never got know to him because by that time he had…already passed. Jimin and Yoongi were wandering the streets and we just so happened to run into them.”

“Oh...”

I wasn't sure what to say to that, they used to stay with someone else? An elderly man. My thoughts wandered as I thought about why some who they had described as kind and caring would throw them out onto the streets.

“Wait, so why would he kick them out? I thought you said he was nice.” I asked curiously, I saw Namjoon hesitate and think for a second, like he wasn't sure if he should tell me, before answering my question.

“He was, but…his family wasn't.” He paused. “They weren't interested in giving hybrids any of the inheritance and didn't want to ‘bear the burden’ of looking after 2 of them…”

Namjoon seemed to struggle with what he was saying, and I reached a hand out and wrapped it around his, giving a firm squeeze and smiling at him when he met my gaze. “That’s horrible.” I spoke while looking up and then over to Hoseok who looked down at his hands before looking up and making eye contact with me.

“Yeah…Not long after that kind old man died, the family took Yoongi and Jimin and left them in an alleyway.”

My heart broke at the story, it was not something I had imagined to be real. I could feel anger bubbling up inside, but I had to remind myself that it was the past and I wouldn't be able to change anything. What matters is that they are here now, they have a loving pack, a safe home, and they have me. “Good thing they found you guys then, right?”

“Yeah, after we found them there were 6 of us, it was harder to stay undetected, and we had to share more food, but it was easier to defend ourselves after that.”

It was hard to hear how bad things were and had been for them. I felt a small tear build up in the corner of my eye and my chest felt heavy and ached. “I’m glad you all found each other.” I smiled brightly at them both, trying to lift the mood of the room.

“We’re happy we found you.” Hobi beamed as he looked over at me, his cute orange fox ears making him all the more cuter. “You saved us.”

You saved me.

I stayed with Hobi and Namjoon for a few hours as we just chatted and talked about things. As the afternoon started turning into the evening, I started feeling a bit tired. I leaned my head on Namjoon’s shoulder as they kept talking. I covered my mouth and closed my eyes as I yawned from tiredness. I could definitely go for a nap, but i wasn't sure if it was so late in the day that if I did, I would be awake all night.

Namjoon and Hoseok paused their conversation as they looked over at me when I yawned.

“Sorry.” I said as I smiled at them.

“No, No, it’s fine.” Namjoon assured me, I smiled and just nodded my head against his shoulder as I looked over to Hobi who was looking back at me sweetly with a soft and affectionate smile on his face. 

I felt my face heat up slightly under his gaze, I gave him a genuine smile as Namjoon started talking again and the two of them fell into a loose conversation while I sat and listened quietly. I listened to them intently as they spoke casually, I occasionally piped into the conversation too, but I was beginning to feel very tired from the day, I reached for my phone on the table before returning back to my position with my head resting and Namjoon’s shoulder.

I switched on my phone to see what time it was, and as I checked the clock, blue light started to enter my eyes. Since it was just about four in the afternoon, taking a little nap wasn't too late. I couldn't help but smile as I gazed at my phone's lock screen picture and the associated memories.

“Are we your lock screen?” I heard Namjoon ask curiously from above me.

I looked up at him as he asked his question before I looked back down at my phone, he was right. My lockscreen picture was Me, Namjoon, Jin, Yoongi, and Hobi. I took it when the other younger members were playing a game at the festival. I was in front holding the camera, Hobi stood next to me on the right side of the photo, posing with a big grin on his face.

Jin stood right behind me, making me look short. He smiled and was also posing. Namjoon stood back from us a bit, over Jin’s shoulder, so you could only see the top half of him, he was looking at the camera smiling. Lastly, Yoongi stood much further back, and he was definitely not posing, we had caught him off guard before he could smile so he was half turned to the camera with a bit of a glare. This photo always made me giggle.

“Yeah, it’s the photo we took at the Carolfarm Festival a while back.” I answered him as I had a big smile on my face before I turned the phone around so Hobi could see it. Just as I did, he got up and sat down on the couch, lifting up my legs so he could and sit down before putting them down on his lap.

I adjusted where I pointed my phone so he could also see. I watched his face change into a big smile before he started laughing, no doubt at the photo and how only half of us actually knew it was being taken.

“I love that photo!” He exclaimed while still laughing, his laugh was contagious, causing me and Namjoon to chuckle too.

“I feel so special.” Namjoon said in a joking tone while holding his hand up to his chest.

I giggled more at his words. “I have all of you guys on my phone.” I explained as I opened my phone with my password, swiping a few times until I could get a clear view of my home wallpaper without the apps in the way.

The wallpaper was Jimin in the centre, taking a selfie. I was standing behind him on the left side, right about to whack a pillow into the side of his head from behind, I had a crazy look in my eye. To the right was Taehyung and Jungkook in the background on the bed. Jungkook was blurry as he was moving when we took the photo, but he was crawling across the bed towards Taehyung, who stood on the other side. His mouth was wide open as he was yelling at the time, he was also slightly motion blurred as he was also moving when we took the photo.

The whole background embodied the chaos that was the younger pack members and me when we were trapped in a room together. I couldn't help but burst into laughter as I remember when and how this photo was taken. I moved it so Namjoon could see it better before I turned the phone to Hobi. Both of them immediately burst into laughter alongside me.

“What on earth was Kook doing?” Namjoon asked from above me, wiping a tear from his eye.

“I think...I think he was trying to bite Taehyung.” I said between laughs as I explained the situation to them both. The three of us continued to giggle and laugh. We talked about my backgrounds, eventually I opened up my photos and we went through them as I showed them some of my favourites. I spent most of the afternoon with Namjoon and Hobi, just talking and chatting and enjoying their time and company, and I took a nap because I was incredibly tired.

It was later that night when my peaceful mood had been interrupted, I was sketching and planning ideas for a new cafe. The plans had been put on hold until we settled into a new house, but me and Seoyeon were still planning a new location. Business was booming and we were quickly outgrowing the small corner space that we had.

“Y/n! Y/n! Y/n!” Someone yelled out, repeating my name a few more times, the voice muffled by the walls until it wasn't, and their yelling was as clear as day. “Y/n!” I turned to face the door in a panic, worried something was wrong, Jungkook came bursting into my room, Taehyung following right behind him.

“What? What's wrong? Is everyone okay?” I asked frantically. Jungkook took a second to gain his balance and catch his breath while shaking his head, Taehyung gave me a thumbs up. Knowing that everything was okay my nerves calmed as I waited for Kook to tell me whatever it was that had him running up to my room.

“We’re having a picnic, and Jin said that there’s a meteor shower tonight, so we're all going to go and watch it.”

Excitement filled me as I thought about seeing a meteor shower and shooting stars, something I had never seen before. I nodded my head as I quickly packed up and slipped on some warm clothes, that being a jumper and some winter leggings, and then followed the boys downstairs.

 As I walked around the corner I was still pulling the jumper into place and adjusting it, I watched Jimin rush around like he was looking for something. Clearly, he found it as he bent down and scooped his arms around something.

He turned around, in his grasp dangling, was a very tired, grumpy looking Yoongi cat, his little cat body swayed slightly as Jimin walked around with him. I snorted slightly at them as I watched the duo disappear out the back door, which we soon also went through.

We walked to the middle of our backyard where I saw a large blanket layed on the ground, a few small ones were folded up on top alongside some pillows too, there was a small group of basic snacks piled in the middle too. Jimin plopped down onto the blanket with Yoongi next to him, finally letting go of the kitty. Jungkook and Taehyung joined him as the three of them sat together at the front of the blanket.

I smiled warmly at the three of them even though they were facing away from me, I glanced down at Yoongi who had curled himself up on one of the pillows, I giggled at that before sitting myself down beside him, I gave him a few pats before his attention was briefly stolen away by the rest of the pack joining us, Namjoon sat on the other side of yoongi and starting petting him too.

Jin sat down next to me, even when we were sitting down, he towered over me, he smiled down at me before moving himself on the blanket and laying down, motioning for me to lay down too and explaining that the meteor shower should start soon. I turned to the side before lying down and resting my head on Jin's chest and hanging my legs over Namjoon’s lap.

I moved Yoongi's pillow, much to his dismay, so that he would get a better view of the sky and not be crushed by my legs. He gave me a look before yawning and glancing away. Hobi sat down also, laying his head on my stomach. I laughed internally as we all sat in a puzzle like fashion, but it was comfy so who cares. Jin shifted and a few seconds later a blanket was thrown over me to keep me warm, I thanked him before snuggling into it.

I turned to yoongi whose feline face lined up with mine, so close I couldn't see anything other than his black fur. He opened his mouth and yawned, stretching his little paws out in front of him before pulling them in under himself whilst staring at me. I scrunch my nose up as his cat breath hit my nose from so close.

“Blegh. You have cat breath.” I whispered to the small kitty in front of me. He stared silently at me before slightly opening his mouth.

“Meow?”

The noise that came out from him was cute and it almost seemed as though he was confused at what I said, but I knew damn well he understood everything, so I gave him a sarcastic smile before looking away.

Just in time, as Jin announced and pointed out the first meteor, that it was starting, everyone went quiet as we stared up at the sky. One streak moved across the night sky. 

The sky went back to its stagnant unmoving state before it exploded with streaks shooting across the sky, lighting up the yard. My mouth was open and agape as I had never seen something so pretty.

“It’s beautiful.” I said mesmerised, I heard a few hums of agreement as we all laid back and watched the sky. It was beautiful, the many stars that most had grown used to were now accompanied by flying rocks as they shined and lit up the sky, travelling from far away and coming past our earth, past the moon, before continuing on their journey.

It was gorgeous and magical, I was in awe so I couldn’t turn my eyes away.

“I love that look.”

I turned to face Jin with a confused look on my face.

“The way you look at things that you love.” He said as he looked down at me, his face showed genuine adoration as his eyes scanned over my face and he smiled. “Do you even know how pretty you are?

I wasn't sure what to say to that, I never thought of myself as being exceptionally pretty, I was okay, but there were definitely girls that were prettier. 

“I have you guys to keep reminding me.”

I smiled up at him, finally thinking of an answer. He smiled back at me lovingly before moving a hand to my head and gently playing with my hair as I turned to look up at the sky once again.

We passed around snacks as we all sat out under the moonlight, facing up towards the sky as we watched the stars. As I bit down into my strawberry and watched the meteors I couldn’t help but wish this moment would last forever, I would give anything to be able to experience this moment with the 8 of us every day.

But unfortunately, time stops for no one, and I slowly found myself drifting off, closing my eyes for just a second turned into a few minutes, turned into 20 minutes, and turned into me fully falling asleep. With my head resting on Seokjin's lap and Yoongi’s small cat body curled up on my stomach I fell asleep under the stars.

I woke up in my room, it was dark, the only light being from the moon which illuminated my room in a bluish glow. I raised my hand up to rub my eyes as I tried to remember what had happened. 

I sat up and looked down at my lap as I scratched my head. I was tucked into my own bed, but I didn’t remember falling asleep here. I looked out the window and up at the clear, dark sky, squinting slightly as it started coming back to me. I remembered that we were watching the meteor shower, outside. I must have fallen asleep. I concluded.

Thinking maybe I could get in another hour or two of sleep, I rubbed my face once more. I laid back down in my bed and got comfortable so I could fall asleep again.

My position didn't feel right, so I rolled over. I turned over and gave my feet a little kick. It wasn't right either. In an attempt to make it work, I pulled my knees up closer to my chest and wrapped my arms around myself, hoping that would work. It didn’t. 

I turned over onto my back and huffed out as I pulled the blankets down. I couldn’t sleep. Even lying alone in my bed made me feel strange in a way I couldn't express. 

My body was itching for me to get up, and so I did. I threw my blankets off and swung myself up before I got out of the bed. I stood in the centre of my room, the moonlight shining on me, and I slowly turned in circles, trying to find something to occupy me, something to scratch the itch inside of me. 

I huffed out as I realised that whatever it was that I needed, wasn’t in the room. I wrapped my blanket around my shoulders before I slowly and quietly opened my door and stepped out into the cold and dark hallway. I instinctively wrapped my arms over each other to keep myself warm as I shuffled down the hallway until I could see the door at the end.

I walked up to it until I was standing in front of it, staring down, I could see my own silhouette cast onto it from the moonlight. I took a deep breath, I shouldn’t open it, I really shouldn’t open it.

I reached out and grabbed onto the cool metal handle, biting my lip. Looking down at it, I hesitated because I knew I shouldn't open it, but I couldn't help but listen to the part of me that was yelling at me to do it. 

I took a deep breath before I slowly pushed open the wooden door, a dark abyss awaiting me. I blinked a few times as my eyes adjusted to the new light levels. The moon light shone in through a window and I could just barely see a silhouette of a very large bed, with many people on it. 

I could hear the light snores and breathing coming from inside the room as I looked at the bed. I couldn’t explain why my body seemed to ache and my heart felt heavy. All I wanted to do was to crawl into the bed. It looked so comfortable and cosy. 

I could see how subtle the bumps in the bed moved, slowly rising up and down as the hybrids beneath breathed peacefully. I could see a tail hanging down the side, the darkness of it being like no other. Taehyung. I could also see a pair of long furry ears that would occasionally twitch. Namjoon.

Was it weird that I ached so badly to join them? Was it wrong? I couldn’t explain it. I wanted to walk over and snuggle into the pile, but I couldn’t, I shouldn’t.

I bit on my lower lip as I stood in the doorway debating with myself while observing the hybrids, who were soundly asleep. Deciding it was best to close the door and go back to my own room I took a step back and began begrudgingly and slowly closing the door in front of me.

But something caught my eye.

A pair of glowing eyes emerged in the shadows as I turned to face the bed, which was lit by the beautiful moon.

Suddenly, someone on the bed sat up. They swayed a little, so even though I couldn't see their face because of the darkness, I could tell they were tired. I just stood there staring at them. I had been discovered. 

I tried to get out of the room and shut the door, but as I went to do so, my blanket got stuck beneath the bottom. I continued to strain and tug on the blanket, shaking the door back and forth in the hopes of freeing it.

“Y/n.”

I froze as I heard my name spoken, my movement stopped as I looked over to the bed. They didn't say anything else, but they opened their arms as an invitation for me to walk over. I hesitated for a moment, questioning whether I was seeing things correctly in the darkness, but when I saw them reach out towards me, beckoning me over to them, I knew I saw correctly.

I dropped the blanket from my shoulders and walked over towards them on the bed. The room was shrouded in darkness, so I was careful where I walked, the only light coming from the moon shining through the window. I still couldn't quite make out their facial features, but based on the shape of their ears and themself, I was pretty sure of who it was. As I stood right in front of them, as close to the bed as I could possibly be without crawling on it. They reached out and wrapped their arms around me before pulling me down into the bed with them.

I gasped quietly from surprise as they shuffled around, moving the blankets, before pulling them over me so I was nice and warm. I snuggled into the blankets and pillows as my body finally felt at ease, that part of me that was longing for them now disappeared and the itch inside me had been scratched.

They pulled me into their chest tightly to keep me warmer, I smiled to myself as I closed my eyes, my body finally being able to give in to the tiredness. I could hear the soft snores and breathing of the other around me, and soon my own soft breaths joined theirs as I fell asleep, my mind finally feeling at peace.

A/n: The next update is here! I honestly couldnt tell you why this took so long, i was having so much trouble writing it for some reason. But anyways, this chapter and the last were just supposed to be more relaxed, a bit of 'slice of life' if you will, just Y/n and the members hanging out together (before the drama comes). Crazy that theres only 11 chapter left. I hope everyone has a great day or night, or wherever you are reading from, Thank you all so much for reading! 💜💜💜

|| series masterlist || next // previously ||

genre(s) -> angst, fluff, non-idol, hybrid au, poly au paring(s) -> ( eventually ) ATEEZ x reader warning(s) -> mention of harm words -> 1.3k

abstract -> healing takes time...

y/n’s perspective

“His memories are still all over the place, it could be a trauma response that his brain has blocked him out from,” Doyoung said and I knew at this point this was true. 

“We’ll have checkups every few months but amnesia isn’t always a happy ending,” he said and I nodded as I was led out to the waiting room.

“You really tied your own hands up when you adopted troublesome hybrids' ' I heard and I turned around to see Chenle. I smiled… “I don’t regret getting them, I love them a lot. They also make me happy. '' I said and he chuckled. “I guess that's all that matters' ' he said and I nodded. 

“I remember how upset you were… with the whole break up,” he said and I sighed. 

“Doesn’t matter anymore… it's almost been a year anyway” I said and he chuckled. “You’ve been busy even after starting a book after so long. I heard he got a hybrid, too though? Something about his family taking in the mother of his family’s hybrid?” he said. He didn’t even like hybrids…

“Here she is” I heard and I saw Jaemin with San. “Take care of yourself,” Chenle said and I nodded as I took San. “How was it?” I asked and he looped his arm with mine as we walked down the street. 

“Find… all the memories I don't remember… is it better if I stop wanting to remember them?” he asked while looking down. 

“Why don’t we find somewhere to eat huh?”

san’s perspective

She took me to a cafe I think I heard Wooyoung talk about. It seemed familiar. She ordered us some food and he stared at me for a while before she decided to speak. 

“You know… you always wanted to come here?” she asked and I was shocked. “Really? Why… did I never come?” I asked and she gave me that sad smile she’s been giving me recently. “Look at the door,” she said and I did… What was so special? 

“It has a bell,” she said and I looked at her confused. “You used to not be able to stand the sound of bells… it caused a negative trigger” she explained. “I know you said I was in a hybrid ring where they made hybrids kill each other… Was I a bad guy?” I asked worriedly and she smiled. 

“No… you’re the sweetest hybrid I could ask for '' she said and I was relieved that she said so but something that didn’t stop haunting me suddenly resurfaced. “Then why did I hurt you?” I asked and she sighed.

“Because you hate humans and what they did to you. You thought I'd be the same” she explained, but I shook my head. “I feel comfortable with you though… I love being around you, why would I ever…” I trailed off feeling my vision start to blur. 

“Here’s your food” I heard as the waiter put our food in front of us. An iced tea and chocolate pancakes… “You really liked chocolate I found out… but if you don’t like it I'll–” “Thank you… you seem to know so much about me” I said and she smiled. 

“I like to think I do,” she said with a soft smile and I nodded. “I’m just sad… I don’t remember much about you. I just know how I feel” I confessed and she nodded. “Well, who says you can’t ask me again?” she asked and I couldn’t help but smile. 

“You’re so patient… thank you,” I said and she nodded. “Always”

I know all of the hybrids back home hate humans. Wooyoung was abandoned and called annoying or anything similar all his life besides when with her. He’s known her the longest and we’ve been friends since we met. Yeosang absolutely hates the higher class… but is insanely involved with her. I know the tigers were abused all their lives to perform dangerous stunts. 

Not all humans were the same… she was really kind. I know I could trust her with anything and have never felt unsafe since returning with her. 

I also know I made her my mate… I was her first hybrid. I belonged by her side. 

As we made it to the apartment I decided to ask… 

“So should I just stop trying to remember everything?” I asked and she sighed. “One time you told me… you wish to forget everything that used to make you sad or angry. So… it’s your choice and whatever choice you choose I'll still be here” she said and I nodded. 

“y/nie! Sannie!” I heard Wooyoung as he talked to me in a hug. “Everything is okay Wooyoung. I brought some food” she said. She mentioned that if she was getting food for me she’d have to get it for everyone… She truly cared for everyone. 

I know I hurt her… but that didn’t make her scared of me. I’ve seen how her friends look at me and the orange tigers… but she always seems to reassure me. 

While Wooyoung called for everyone, I decided to pull aside the tiger… “Can we talk?” I asked and his eyes shook but nodded. He avoided me more than everyone else. Even the white tiger made an effort to befriend me.

“Are you alright?” he asked and I nodded. “I don’t remember much but I feel annoyed by you…” I said and he nodded, not surprised. “Can… we get along?” I asked and his eyes widened with his tail suddenly twitching, catching him by surprise.

“Why all of a sudden?” he asked and I sighed. “She… she seemed to forgive me for hurting her and I know she also forgave you. I wanted to try following her example” I said and he sighed. “You don’t have to forgive me. What I did–” “Was just as bad as me apparently… I don’t remember much but I do remember hurting her. We both were wrong about her huh?” I asked and he nodded. 

“I will never forgive myself for what I did,” he said and I chuckled. “Neither will I,” I confessed. 

“Can you make me a promise?” I asked and he nodded eagerly. “I know you try your best to protect so please… When I'm not by her side and I'm often not, I don't like leaving the apartment. Please continue to protect her” I asked and he smiled.

“You didn’t have to ask that,” he said and I smiled. “Thank you, hyung!”

y/n’s perspective 

The panther was more cuddly than usual. He was already asleep, hugging me in his sleep when I heard a knock. 

“Come in,” I said and I saw Hongjoong. “Need anything?” I asked and he laughed. “I don’t think you can offer anything while trapped by San,” he said and I noticed slowly he started calling everyone by their name. Not panther… nor doberman… nor fox. San, Yeosang, and Wooyoung he’s been calling them.

“He seems to be getting better,” Hongjoong said and I nodded. “I’m glad he is… he’s more energetic too,” I said and he chuckled.

“He forgave me,” he said and I felt my eyes widen and even a smile grow on my face. “I know… he’s okay,” he said, letting out a small laugh. “You and Seonghwa are getting along with everyone… I’m glad” I said and he nodded. 

“Thank you… truly for adopting s even though I’m trouble” he said and I offered a smile. “I’m glad… I enjoy the chaos” I said and he smiled. His tail swished back and forth happily. 

“I did have a request though,” he said. “Anything,” I said and he chuckled. 

“Well… now that Wooyoung is in the process of moving into San’s room… could I possibly get my own room?”

@wonuangel @danirael @angelsaway @krissroo @minkysmilk @mayonnaise-on-toast @robertsbbygirl @superbbananananana @hyukssunflower @kitty4hwa @justconniez @senpai-of-doom @kibs-and-bits @caityelise99 @ilovekinny @ateezennie23 @wooahaelemons @purplelady85 @watamotee33@chidess97 @littlelostdemonofthelight @maliamaiden @burntarm1n @spooo00oky @eastleighsblog @momo-peachy @kitstar1117 @quartzpirate @sunnyhokyu @iwishiwasrichasfuck @theginger543210 @pandolinka @ddaeing @kpopnightingale @slid3er @kekdo-520 @puppyminnnie @sparklinghwa222 @calicanbeevil @itsvxlentine @atinism @loumin908 @smally97 @rxnexxi @acetruepunk @majesticbeluga @namjooncrabs @tashizxy @itstheghostofmypast @smilefordongil @teeziny @totallynotlyntv @kyeos4ng @prodsh00ky @acescavern

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♡ into the aurora | series masterlist.

summary: you didn’t expect to run into choi san outside of the venue, especially when your phone was dead and you were stranded in a random city. a kind offer for a phone charger turns into so much more, and you end up falling into a relationship with all eight members of ateez.

pairings: ot8 x reader

genre: fluff, angst, romance, ateez ensemble x reader, polyamory, non-idol!reader, fem!reader, eventual smut

warnings: handled on a chapter by chapter basis, any cw/tw will be clearly identified. if any need to be added, please contact me directly and I will update accordingly!

current word count: 208.6K

✶ one ✶ two ✶ three ✶ four ✶ five ✶ six ✶ seven ✶ eight ✶ nine ✶ ten ✶ eleven ✶ twelve ✶ thirteen ✶ fourteen ✶ fifteen ✶ sixteen ✶ seventeen ✶ eighteen ✶ nineteen ✶ twenty ✶ twenty-one ✶ twenty-two ✶ twenty-three ✶ twenty-four ✶ twenty-five ✶ twenty-six ✶ twenty-seven ✶ twenty-eight ✶ twenty-nine ✶ thirty ✶ thirty-one ✶ thirty-two ✶ thirty-three ✶ thirty-four ✶thirty-five ✶

please note, there will be a sequel! i'm taking a bit of a break before working on that, but new aurora content will be posted in 2023~!

if you prefer to read on AO3, you can find that here

my fic masterlist can be found here!