LMAO HELP I'M WHEEZING RN AND I HAVE TO KEEP QUIET CAUSE I'M IN A RESTAURANT WITH MY FAMILY

LMAO HELP I'M WHEEZING RN AND I HAVE TO KEEP QUIET CAUSE I'M IN A RESTAURANT WITH MY FAMILY

this is why you should NOT hit on Kalim Al-Asim

My piece for the ‘who does the prefect like?’ writing collab by @dulcesiabits ! Sorry this is so late, I hope you enjoy it!

note: they/them pronouns used for reader

“They’re onto us, Kalim.”

Kalim blinked. “What do you mean, (Y/N)?”

“The first years,” you hissed, looking left and right. “They suspect that I’m dating someone.”

All the doors and windows of the Ramshackle Dorm were safely locked, and you had drawn the curtains for good measure. You would have switched off the lights too, if there were any (Crowley had forgotten to pay the electricity bills again). The only thing lighting the room you and Kalim were three of the Ramshackle ghosts.

They were your close allies, which you were grateful for. You would need allies in the times to come…

“…how is that a problem?” Kalim frowned with confusion. “It’s not a big deal if people found out we were dating.”

“…” Your eyes began to brim with tears, and you reached over to your boyfriend and tenderly cupped his cheeks with your hands. “Oh, Kalim…sweetheart, angel, love of my life…if people found out we were dating…it would be a complete travesty!”

“Travesty, travesty, travesty!” echoed the ghosts in perfect synchronisation.

“R-really?” Kalim’s eyes shone with fear.

“Yes!”

“…ah…!” Kalim shivered a little as well. “I don’t know why you would think that, but if you say so…do you have a plan?”

“Kalim…” Your face darkened, and you sat back up on the couch. “We need…to become…pals.”

“…but we’re already pals!” chirped Kalim. “You’re my favourite pal!”

“No, Kalim.” You shook your head sadly. “We need to become simply pals. Nothing more. We can only do pal stuff with each other. No kissing. No holding hands. No buying me gifts. No calling each other ‘sugar-bear,’ ‘sweetie-pie,’ or anything of the sort.”

Kalim’s eyes widened, and he began tearing up. “Not even hugging…?”

“Especially not hugging.”

“…what…what if I slip up?” Terror dawned on Kalim’s face. “What if I accidently hug you in public? Then everyone would find out…!”

“If you slip up and accidently show me affection in any way, you need to jump exactly six feet away from me as quick as possible and say, ‘But not like, in a weird way!’ That should cover it up.”

“I hope I don’t give us away…”

“Of course, you won’t! I wouldn’t have told you my plan if you would!” You gave Kalim a loving, adoring smile. “I trust you, Kalim.”

You suddenly turned away from him. “I’m afraid you must leave now, Grim will be arriving…leave, my dear, lest our secret love be revealed to the world!”

“I’m leaving, I’m leaving!”

And Kalim ran out of Ramshackle, trying to be discreet as possible.

By which one means: not discreet at all.

…

“The prefect hasn’t been answering my calls,” grumbled Ace. “They’re probably off kissing Kalim again.”

“Really?” Deuce frowned with confusion. “The prefect isn’t dating anyone, though.”

“Deuce.” Ace grabbed Deuce by the shoulders. “I want you to think. Who told you that the prefect was single?”

“The prefect told me.”

“And why would they say that they’re single?”

“Because they are single?”

“Dummy.” Ace bonked Deuce on the head, and Deuce yelps. “What was that for?!”

“I was trying to get that brain of yours working! Kalim constantly comments hearts under (Y/N)’s photos on Magicam, how can the not be dating?!”

“Maybe because they’re friendship hearts!”

“They have matching heart necklaces with each other’s names on them!”

“Maybe those are friendship necklaces!”

“Deuce, we saw them making out in the corridor.”

“…maybe…they were…making out…platonically?”

Ace facepalmed. “Platonically?! Are you kidding me, Juice?”

“Don’t call me that!”

Jack, who was sitting in the corner of the room silently, finally speaks up. “There are a lot of different sexualities out there, Ace. Platonic make-outs are probably a thing, you know.”

“See, Ace?!” Deuce smiled triumphantly. “I was right!”

“However,” Jack interrupted Deuce’s victory celebration, “I know enough about the prefect that I can be sure that them and Kalim are probably dating.”

“Nah, they’re definitely dating,” called out Epel. “I heard (Y/N) call Kalim ‘wifey’ the other day.”

“What?!” exclaimed Ace and Deuce in unison.

“Yeah. They’ve even got rings. With diamonds and everything, but they’re kinda subtle, so you have to really be paying attention.” Epel looked deep in thought. “Gotta say, if those are real, they hafta be worth a lotta money…”

“No way you’re telling the truth,” scorned Ace. “Even the prefect can’t be that cringe.”

“Are you callin’ me a liar?!”

“You both, calm down,” said Jack. “We need to stop pondering over the prefect’s love life; it isn’t any of our business.”

“That’s the whole point, Jack,” responded Ace, rolling his eyes. “There’s a reason trashy tabloids sell, you know. It’s no fun if it is your business.”

“Still, it doesn’t feel right…”

“Well, if you wanna leave, the door’s right there.” Ace gestured to said door, and smirked. “But be honest, Jack: you’re here because you’re curious, aren’t you? You might try to act all ‘holier than thou’ but deep down you’re dying to know if the prefect is really dating Kalim.”

“…” Jack frowned, but he didn’t move from his seat at the round table.

“Sebek, you haven’t said anything,” noted Deuce, looking at the green-haired, stoic boy. “What do you think?”

“Well, at first, I was admittedly shocked by those two’s behaviour. Handholding? Before marriage? That’s how unplanned pregnancies happen!”

In the background, Ace choked on his own laughter.

“But,” continued Sebek, “When I heard the prefect refer to Kalim as ‘wifey’, it became clear to me that they were, in fact, married or at least engaged, in which case their public displays of affection, while still distasteful, were not the immoral acts of promiscuity I had initially thought them to be.”

“But…they’re not married…?” Deuce treaded carefully, he knew this would set off an explosion.

“What.” A great big frown marred Sebek’s features, and he shouted, “THEN THEY MUST BE SEPERATED AT ONCE! LEST THEY BECOME CORRUPTING INFLUENCE ON THE YOUNG MASTER, NAY, A CORRUPTING INFLUENCE ON OUR ENTIRE GENERATION!”

“Tell me you have no bitches without telling me you have no bitches,” snickered Ace under his breath.

Jack slammed his hand on the table. “We need to stop this madness. We’ve become too unhealthily obsessed with this matter.”

“I wouldn’t say obsessed…” murmured Epel.

“Epel, you made an evidence board,” said Jack pointedly. “With red wool.”

“Okay, maybe we’re kinda obsessed…”

“Anways, we need to bring an end to this once and for all. Either, we find out the truth of the prefect’s relationship, or we drop the entire investigation.”

Murmurs of agreement sounded in the room.

“…But…” Deuce raised his hand. “How are we going to find out if they really are dating or not?”

“Don’t worry, I’ve got a plan,” Ace reassured him. “It’s fool-proof, so it should even work on the prefect.”

“And what is the plan?” asked Jack.

Ace smirked.

“Ace, what is the plan?”

Ace’s smirk became wider.

…

“Are you lost, babygorl?” said Jack stiffly, before leaning on the wall in front of Kalim.

Honestly, he should have known better than to have gone with this plan. The only reason he was even here was because Ace was holding his cacti hostage (that little shit). And now, he was here. Trying to seduce the prefect’s man.

Why him?

“Oh, you’re Jack, aren’t you? Honey bea– the prefect mentioned you!” Kalim smiled. “I’m not lost! But thanks, though.”

“Um…” Jack coughed. “You’re welcome.”

The tiny receiver in his ear crackled to life. “What the hell, Jack?!” Ace shouted, his voice tinny in the small speaker. In the corner of his eye, Jack could spot Deuce, Ace and Epel buried in a nearby bush, watching Jack with a hawk’s eye. Sebek wasn’t there, because the moment Ace had explained the plan, he had passed out at the thought of ‘intimate talk’ before marriage. 

“That wasn’t smooth. At all,” said Epel. “Try a different one.”

Jack swallowed. “Anyways…” This is so embarrassing, this is so embarrassing– “Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date?”

“Oh, I do really like dates!” Kalim’s eyes sparkled. “Why, you got any?”

“…”

“What the heck was that delivery, Jack,” Ace groaned. “You need to be more sultry! More seductive!”

What the hell did Ace know about being sultry and seductive? Didn’t he ghost his only girlfriend?

Jack decided to keep it simple. “Do you…do you want to go out with me?”

“…we are outside, though?” Kalim frowned.

“He’s so…stupid!” Deuce shout-whispered. “A lost case!”

“You’re the one to talk,” replied Ace. Oh, he couldn’t just keep his mouth shut, could he?

“Why, you–!”

“Deuce, stop choking Ace­– WHAT WAS THAT FOR, GODDAMIT?!”

A few more shouts, a crash, and the line went dead.

But hey, Jack guessed this meant he could leave now.

“…I have somewhere to be. Goodbye.”

“Oh, goodbye, Jac–”

“Jack.”

Jack felt a dark, looming, angry presence behind him, one which made him want to start running, but Jack was a proud person, and he didn’t run away, so he turned around, and sorely regretted it.

Because it was you.

With a face that screamed ‘bloody murder’.

“Hey, (Y/N)!” chirped Kalim from behind Jack. “Jack was just asking me if we could go out! Want to join us?”

“Prefect,” began Jack desperately, “I promise you that this isn’t my fault, they were holding my cacti hostage–”

“HOW DARE YOU HIT ON MY WIFE?” you roared, with the force of a thousand suns.

Pride be damned. Jack started running.

…

Grim blinked, as he witnessed you chasing Jack with a murderous look, then turned his gaze to Epel, Ace and Deuce fist fighting in a bush. “What’s happening?”

“Beats me!” said Ortho cheerfully. “Wanna go to my dorm to play some video games?”

“Sure, sounds fun!”

Damn the 1st years sure are nosy...

Pretty sure we all know Dandelions=Ruggie

Also yes, I'm binging these :)

the curious case of the prefect’s boyfriend.

summary: who on earth is the ramshackle prefect dating? Their friends are determined to find out. (ft. Ace, Deuce, Jack, Epel, Sebek).

notes: 1.8k words, fic, fluff, a part of my “who does the prefect like?” writing collab

One drizzly, gray afternoon, you return home from a long day of classes to find your best friends sitting on your couch. Epel is crunching on a bag of chips you bought yesterday, and Jack is dealing out a pack of cards to Ace, Deuce and Sebek, who promptly look up at your arrival.

You drop your school bag on the floor, books clattering on the floor. “I gave you guys a key to my dorm for emergencies.”

Ace slams his hand down on the table, making the cards flutter. “This IS an emergency. You’re dating someone, prefect, and you didn’t tell us? Us, your best friends?”

“I don’t really think we’re entitled to their personal life–” Deuce begins, before Ace shakes his head.

“Be quiet, Deuce. I’m playing the good cop, and you’re the bad one.”

“Why do I have to be the bad cop?” Deuce mumbles.

“So, prefect. What do you have to say for yourself?” Ace says.

“…What makes you think I’m dating someone?”

“That’s a very suspicious answer! Try again.”

“I thought you were playing the good cop,” Jack says.

Keep reading

Floofy

: ̗̀➛ I'm proud to say that I'm a part of the TWST collab ("who does the prefect like?") hosted by @dulcesiabits!!! I hope that you all enjoy this╰(⸝⸝⸝´꒳`⸝⸝⸝)╯💖💖

—❥ ᴅᴀʀʟɪɴɢ ɪ ғᴀɴᴄʏ ʏᴏᴜ

warnings: none

genre: romance, fluff, (attempted) comedy

pairing: riddle rosehearts x gn!reader (+ platonic first years hehe)

word count: 884

extra notes: the reader is the ramshackle prefect!

♪ london boy – taylor swift

—♡ “Do you know why we called you here for this meeting, (Y/N)?”

“Uhh. . .This is my dorm, y’know, you’re the ones who asked to come over–”

“That’s besides the point!”

“The point is. . .”

“We know you’re dating Riddle.” ♡—

『••♡••』

So, you’re probably wondering how this all started. Well then. . .Let’s start from the beginning, shall we?

— ʚ The Study ‘Dates’ ɞ

It all started with a small study date. It wasn’t even a date at the time, it was just Riddle helping you study for a test (as repayment for helping him round up some loose hedgehogs a few days prior).

The other first years didn’t really think anything of it at the time but they didn’t expect the study ‘dates’ to keep happening. It even got to the point where you were cancelling plans with them just because of these study sessions with Riddle. But hey, maybe it was just you wanting to get good grades for you and Grim, right?

— ʚ Your Phone ɞ

Usually when you hung out with the first years, you would only use your phone to show them something funny or to use Google to prove someone (typically Ace) wrong about something.

But now something felt. . .off. You were looking at your phone a lot more often than normal and were even giggling at whatever was on your screen.

You’ve never giggled at your phone.

What was even weirder is that you would lay your phone faced down so no one could read your messages. People usually only did that when they were hiding something. That's when Ace came up with a quote-unquote ‘brilliant’ plan. (Spoiler alert: it backfired.)

— ʚ The Stupid Brilliant Plan ɞ

When Ace suggested following you and Riddle around to see what you both did, Sebek and Deuce were yelling about how it was an invasion of privacy but Epel didn’t seem to mind the idea. Jack didn’t even react other than slapping the palm of his hand onto his forehead at the stupid plan that Ace concocted.

Needless to say, the dumb idea was put into motion.

The group put on disguises they deemed as acceptable before following you to the library. So far the study session was normal. Just Riddle going through the subject and making sure you understood everything he was saying. Sure, there were a few moments where his knee brushed yours and he got a bit too close for the first years’ comfort, but nothing that could make them 100% sure whether you were dating Riddle or not.

They watched as you both put your textbooks into your bags and that's when they saw it. . .Your lips pressed against Riddle's in a simple yet sweet kiss. His hand interlocked with yours for a second, giving it a light squeeze before letting go. A smile that neither Ace or Deuce have ever seen graced Riddle's face—a smile that was full of love and a bit of shyness.

“My rose, what did I say about PDA?” The dorm head seemed anything but annoyed despite what his question may have implied. That smile never leaving, instead it simply grew when your hand reached for his yet again. “I know, sorry! I just couldn’t help it. Plus it’s not like anyone is around~♪”

BLEGH. That was the only thought running through the first years’ minds (minus Jack, he was just glad that you’re happy in all honesty). Ace and Deuce couldn’t believe their eyes. Their dorm head was secretly a softy but for their FRIEND? The two thought they were going to faint on the spot.

Before they threw up their lunch, they quickly ran back to Ramshackle.

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!”

“RIDDLE? FOR REAL?!”

“THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING!”

“WHY WOULD THE HUMAN KEEP THIS FROM US IF THEY TRULY RESPECT US?!”

After your friends finished their mini breakdown, that’s when they decided it was time for an interrogation.

『••♡••』

So, back to present time!

You sat on the dusty couch while the boys’ all stood in front of you. “So, what do you have to say?”

“Well, first of all, I don’t like that you decided to spy on me. Second of all, if you were really my friends. . . Wouldn’t you just wait for me to say something when I was ready?”

Well that certainly wasn’t what they expected to hear. Suddenly they felt something akin to guilt.

“I was actually going to tell you soon since Riddle seems like he wants to take this relationship seriously but guess I don’t need to do that now.” You couldn’t help but sigh before standing up and flicking Ace’s forehead. “Ow! You–. . .Y’know what, I deserved that.” He couldn’t even argue with you on that one.

“Nonetheless, you guys are my friends, so as long as you are happy for me in the end then it’s fine,” you spread out your arms, “Group hug?” That crooked yet loveable smile was hard to say no to. No matter how much they tried to act like that didn’t like the hug, you knew that they didn’t actually mind it one bit.

“I just have one condition if you're dating Riddle.”

“That being?”

“If I ever catch the two of you being all sappy or lovey-dovey then I won’t be able to talk to you for the rest of that week.”

“Oh shut it, Ace!”

Hope this was enjoyable cause my writer's block is still being a pain (╥﹏╥)💖💖💖 — 💘 Hallow 💘

We all hate Crowley :)))

It’s Dire Crowley slander all day, everyday 😤

{The image isn’t mine, I found it on Pinterest}

At this point anyone who sres my rbs know that I'm a huge sucker for floof(fluff) and cyute(cute) stuff

Hmm? What's that sound? Oh don't worry, it's just my heart getting shot from all the cuteness and fluffyness :)

ADOPTING MEOWMOUCHE | ♡

﹙SCARAMOUCHE/WANDERER X FEM READER﹚

An: HIHII I'VE BEEN OFFLINE THESE DAYS SOOO here i am hshshshshsh

Tw: SPOILER AT SCARAMOUCHE'S LORE 3.3

Oh dear一 you found him at the streets, poor and cold kitten on the box. You tried to pick hin up but he hissed at you thinking you're gonna hurt him.

Thank god you have a umbrella and it starts to rain.. you can't just leave the poor cat freezing and starving at the streets!. So you gently pick up thr box before walking to your home

After entering your house you went to the bathroom and give your new adopted cat a warm bath. He was tensed but managed to calm down and relax.

After bathing him you grab your blower and dry him up with a clean towel. 'i should buy some things for him..' you thought and walk to the kitchen giving him some food

"hmm... What should i name you.." the cat tilt his head before a lightbulb on your head appeared "aha! I know!.. im gonna name you.. Kuni! How does that sound hm?" You smiled and pet him before cooking dinner for yourself.

Its been 1 week since you adopted Kuni. At the very first day he was distant to you and will purposely knock things off the counter just for you to get mad at him but u didn't! Instead you keep being patient with him and day by day you earn his trust.

The next morning you woke up earlier than usual; and getting ready to take Kuni for a walk and buy him some things!

"Kuni! Breakfast is ready" He ran towards you in such a speed and you smiled before putting his breakfast down and watch him eat while you pet his head

"hmm i was thinking if we should go out and buy you some things? And maybe get you a vaccination too.."(YK THOSE ANTI RABIES VACCINE) After hearing that Kuni stopped eating before staring at you; a little bit scared..

You look at him with concerned face "don't worry we can adjust the schedule next day for your vaccination but for now i will buy you your own things!" You smiled before taking a bath and get ready.

--

"alright good to go!" You carried Kuni at your arms because 1. you're not that cruel to put a leash around him! 2. You also like carrying him at your arms.

Entering at the pet shop the first thing you have to buy him is... Food!

Grabbing a card you put him at the front for him to see the surrounding while you put cat foods at the cart

"now that we have your food i want you to choose which color would you like!" You held out 2 towels; one is indigo color matching his fur and one is a blue-greenish one.

You took him out of the cart for him to choose and he choose... The indigo one! "alright great choice!" You put him and the towel at the cart before exploring the store more

You almost forgot to add food container for his food! Buy thank god you didn't, grabbing 2 type of food container (1 for his food and the other for his water). You LOVE spoiling your cat even if you go broke because of his things its fine! You have another card for you to buy yourself some things you wanted (wish that was me..)

"i should definitely get you a cat backpack and your very own bed & shampoo!" And just like you did you bought him everything he needed

"alright that would be.. 3,871!" It feels heavy to your wallet but you still payed for it.

After going Home you excitedly place everything on its place, his bed at your room his food container at the kitchen, his towel at the bathroom hanger(yk the thing they use to hang their towel) and his shampoo at the bathroom shelf.

Feeling tired you decided to cuddle up with Kuni; rubbing your cheeks at his head. You hug him tight but not enough to suffocate him ofc<3

While he just melts at your embrace and sleep with you♡