Star Wars Masterlist

Star Wars Masterlist

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- Ours

- Silent Suffering

- He’s Coming For You, I Promise

- my tears ricochet

- Never Grow Up

- You’re Losing Me

- I'll Be There

- Your Jedi

- Enough for You

- Tell Me Later

- Haunted

- You Were My Only Hope

- Ready to Run

- The Perfect Mix

- Promise Me Forever

- First and Last

- Right Decision

- Safe Place (Daughter Reader)

- Forget Me

- With Me

- Step Into The Daylight

- Where We’re Meant To Be

- Bigger Than The Whole Sky

- We’ll Meet Again

- Got You Back

- Spark of Hope

Hii!! Just wanted to let you know that your writing is absolutely incredible <3 <3

hey, thank you so, so much!!! I'm glad you like my work, it means so much to me!💜💜

I've Been Waiting For You

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Angstember Prompt - “Don't look"

It seemed like a lifetime ago you were in an entirely different place, despite the repetitiveness of the days each of them was still different enough that you held your breath every morning when one of the many men watching the growing group of people came in. All different types of people were being held, men, women, girls, and boys of all ages. 

You knew that the day was guaranteed to have some sort of pain, at least one moment but usually more than a handful where you just wanted to curl in a ball and cry. The days were long and the nights even longer, when you finally did have a moment’s peace it was spent on edge, silently begging somebody to come and rescue you, begging for anybody to save you.

One day things changed, it started out much the same as any other day with one of the men barging into the room but instead of yelling for you all to get ready he walked further into the room, two other men following close behind, and made his way to you. The smirk on his face had your stomach churning and you knew something worse was coming.

You hardly put up a fight as your wrists were bound together behind your back, how could you when they hardly fed you? The small bit of food you did get was shared with the younger children, the look of hunger and fright on their faces managed to get you to shove your own hunger down. 

From there you were led out of the room, scared eyes watching your every step until everything went dark as a blindfold was placed over your eyes. You felt your breathing quicken, tears filled your eyes but you scrunched them shut tightly to prevent them from falling, knowing that whatever was about to happen would only be ten times worse if they saw you crying. 

You didn’t know what was to come but you did know that when somebody was taken from the big room you were all forced into they never came back. Screaming could usually be heard once they were taken and everybody assumed the worst from that point.

It wasn’t until you felt the cold air that you paused, the man behind you shoving you forward causing you to stumble over your feet before you righted yourself and continued on. You couldn’t remember the last time you had actually been outside, for so long you had been trapped within the walls of wherever they were holding you and despite your desperate, silent pleas to be rescued you had long since given up hope of it ever actually happening.

You forced a sob that threatened to escape your throat down, knowing that you weren’t actually free, in fact it was probably the opposite. You felt yourself get grabbed by the man behind you, his large hand wrapping around your bicep as he stopped you only to shove you into a car seconds later. You were forced between two of the men that had led you out whilst the other drove, no words being spoken the entire journey as you tried to prepare yourself to die.

You couldn’t say how long the car ride lasted, the blindfold that was still tightly in place prevented you from even taking a guess at what time it was. It seemed to take forever though before the car pulled to a stop and the doors were being opened. 

The man to your right shoved you out of the car, you had almost fallen to the ground if not for one of them catching you by the arm again. He dragged you along with him, the air around you felt colder now so you assumed at least a good few hours had passed since you’d gotten in the car.

You tried to steady your breathing but found it was too difficult, your breath coming out in fast bursts that ached your chest. You flinched as a loud knock filled the silence, the sound of a heavy door opening coming a moment later.

The air in the room was almost suffocating compared to the cold outside but it finally forced a deep breath out of you. Music could be heard alongside several different conversations that you couldn’t make out and the smell of cigarettes and alcohol filled the room. 

You were dragged through the room, walking until you were forced to stop and the blindfold was ripped from you. Despite the darkness of the room you still had to blink hard to adjust to it, low lights that barely lit the room up but did well enough of a job that you saw a group of men all sat around a table, half-drunk glasses scattered in front of them and they all had their attention on you. Hungry eyes darting up and down your figure as you resisted the urge to shudder.

“You always do bring such beauties for me.” A man at the head of the table grinned and you just about suppressed a grimace at the expression. 

“Boss said she’s all yours, payment for the ammo.” One of the men behind you said and this time you couldn’t hide your reaction, it was only a widening of your eyes but you knew the man at the table had seen it as his grin widened wickedly.

“A pretty payment indeed.” He replied, his eyes having yet to leave you even as he waved a dismissive hand to the two men who had escorted you in. 

Once the men had gone the man at the table stood and you forced yourself to stand still as he approached you, his hand coming up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear before his fingers grazed your cheek.

When he flicked a blade in front of you, however, that’s when you couldn’t hide your flinch, the blade coming closer towards you had you fighting to stay still.

“Relax gorgeous,” He murmured softly, the blade cutting away the rope restraints on your wrists and the man brushing his thumb over the raw skin. “I’ll take real good care of you.”

Months passed much the same as they always had except this time instead of answering to the group of men who had originally taken you, you now answer to Julian. He treated you just as poorly as the others had, fed you just as little though thankfully you didn’t have to share with anybody. You had long since given up on your silent prayers of rescue, came to the realisation nobody was coming, that this was your life now.

Every night without fail you went to bed sore and with tears falling down your face unsure of just how much more of this you could take.

Bruises seemed to cover most of your body, a brutal beating from Julian after a rival gang had betrayed him. You were left curled up, unable and unwilling to move. Months and months of constant beatings and you couldn’t do it anymore. 

You stayed where you were for a while, probably would have stayed there even longer had you not flinched into a sitting position, every part of you aching and protesting the move but the reaction was automatic when hearing a gunshot, the shooter seemed to keep his finger on the trigger for a while as it didn’t pause, it just continued shooting.

Julian ran into the room, pale faced with sweat pooling on his forehead as he looked at you with wide eyes. You didn’t have time to react, before you knew it the man was yanking you up and placing you in front of him as he backed out of the room, his gun stretched in front of him to your right, visible to you as you looked at it in fear, knowing that with one wrong move and the man wouldn’t hesitate to take your life.

Eventually Julian made it to the safe room, it was only small, the doorway disguised so that it couldn’t be found in a situation like this. Julian kept you in front of him, kept his gun raised and the only sound to be heard was his heavy breathing as you tried to stay as silent as possible even with the tears making their way down your face, mixing with the dried blood that had poured from cuts made by his rings earlier. 

The silence seemed to last for hours, tension heavy in the air as the sound of gunshots finally stopped. It was so silent that the sound of heavy boots outside in the hallway could clearly be heard from behind the safe room door, Julian's grip on your arm was painfully tight as he held you in place. You weren’t exactly sure what his plan was, he had made a lot of enemies with other gang members in the time you had known him and not one of them would hesitate to kill you to get to him, all he was doing was buying himself maybe a few more seconds.

The door opened and your eyes widened at the man before you, two guns were held in his hands as he filled the doorway, the light behind him making him look even more dangerous though you supposed the blood covering him also helped with that image. 

The man didn’t move, just stood before the two of you and you felt Julian’s fingers digging into your skin somehow even tighter than they already had been, you were close enough to feel him shaking as he shot his own gun.

You flinched at the deafening noise right next to your ear, tears flowing faster down your face because despite the fact you knew the man wouldn’t keep you alive if it meant killing Julian there was some part of you, some small part that you thought had died a long time ago, that hoped the man would help you get away from this gang, from Julian, but Julian had ruined it.

Your eyes fell shut, not wanting to watch as the man who could have changed your life was killed.

Instead though you heard the sound of the other man’s gun, one single shot came from him before you felt Julian slump forward against your back. You hadn’t even fully registered what had happened, barely felt his weight before you were being pulled away from Julian. The stranger moved the guns to rest on his back as one arm wrapped around your shoulder and the other guided your head to his chest, holding you against him so you couldn’t move.

“Don’t look,” He murmured to you when you tried to pull away to look into the safe room, “He can’t hurt you anymore, I promise.”

With those words you began to sob, for the first time in years you didn’t try to suppress the noise, you just let them out as the man guided you from the building, never once letting go of you. 

By the time you got to the man's van your sobs had calmed into sniffles and shaky breaths even as the tears continued to flow down your cheeks, the man held the door open for you and you climbed in despite your reluctance to let go of him. The man gave you a soft smile, a stark contrast to how he had looked before in the doorway, taking his jacket off and wrapping it around you before shutting the door gently and making his way over to the driver's side.

The journey was silent, you didn’t know where the man was taking you but you didn’t care. It felt easy to trust the man, maybe trust wasn’t the right word but you certainly didn’t think he was a part of another gang. You had met many gang members and none of them had ever been quite as gentle with you.

Eventually the two of you pulled up to an apartment complex and Frank was the first to get out, you sat in your seat staring up at the building unable to remember a time when you yourself had lived in a crappy run down building with family members you couldn’t quite recall. 

You jumped slightly when the man opened the door for you, you knew he had seen it but didn’t comment on it, instead he gave you a small smile and held a hand out for you which you took gratefully. It was slightly overwhelming walking into the building, even more so walking into the man’s apartment and being greeted by an excited dog jumping up at you.

You couldn’t help but flinch as it did, your experience with dogs was limited but the gang had some that they used to scare people and it worked, the dogs weren’t afraid to attack when commanded though you did feel awful for them once you saw exactly how the members trained them to do it.

“Down,” The man commanded, not having to raise his voice or lift his fist to get the dog to listen and you watched in slight awe as the dog whined but did as his owner told him before trotting off to a dog bed in the living room. “He’s a big softie really.” The man told you and you couldn’t help the small, barely there smile that pulled at your lips, something that hadn’t happened in a long time, as the man shot his dog a soft look before turning his attention to you just in time to watch you shiver slightly.

“I’ll get you some clothes,” The man told you, gesturing for you to follow him into a bedroom.

You stood in the doorway, arms wrapping around yourself to fight against the chill. You were glad for the man's jacket covering your less than clothed body. The lack of clothing was something you had long since grown used to, not having been allowed to wear proper clothing since you were taken and you couldn’t but feel excited at the chance to wear some, to actually be warm and covered for the first time in years. 

“They’ll be a bit big but they’ll do,” he said as he handed you some clothing, “Come out when you’re ready.” 

He waited until you gave him a nod before he left the room, closing the door behind him with a soft click. You could only stare down at the clothing in your hands for a few moments, brushing your hands along them and feeling how soft they were.

You eventually managed to move again, peeling off the jacket and the little clothing you had before changing into the man’s clothes, blinking against the sudden wave of tears that filled your eyes again, completely overwhelmed at everything around you, at the fact that you were finally free from the men who had taken you, free from Julian and his men.

Once you were done you opened the door, your old clothes bundled in your hands as you looked around and spotted Frank in the kitchen, two steaming bowls in front of him. 

“Give me them,” he said, reaching to take the old clothes from you and not even hesitating to throw them in the trash much to your amusement and you couldn’t stop the small giggle that left your lips, the man’s face lighting up at the sound. “Sit down, got some soup for you, eat as much as you want.”

The two of you sat at the small table, knees brushing against each other as you picked the spoon up and brought it to your lips. Despite it being such a plain meal to most, to you it was the best thing you had tasted. It warmed you from the inside and you couldn’t stop yourself from scooping more into your mouth.

The man ate his own soup at a much slower pace, watching you with amused eyes though a sympathetic smile played on his lips. So many questions flooded his head, how long had you been with Julian’s gang, how long had you been beaten and starved, when had you been taken, were there more of you?

He waited until you had finished, until you had declined another bowl before he broke the peaceful silence that had settled between you as you ate. 

“You got anywhere to go kid? Any family?” He asked gently, not wanting to upset you but if there was somebody out there for you he’d make it his goal to get you back to them.

You shook your head, looking away from him as you did. Obviously you were sad about your family but over the years you had sort of forgotten things about them, you knew the basics, remembered how many people made up your family but forgot what they looked like, forgot exactly where you had lived with them. You were so young when you were taken the few memories you did have were quickly replaced with ones from the first place you had stayed immediately after being taken. 

This life was the only one you truly knew and that was terrifying.

“That’s alright,” Frank told you softly, causing you to look up at him with wide eyes, watching as he reached over slowly and took your hands in one of his to stop you from nervously picking at the skin. “You can stay here.”

“Thank you,” You told him, voice breaking as tears filled your eyes again and several managed to trickle down your cheek, “Thank you for saving me.” 

Frank smiled at you as he leaned over to raise his hand that wasn’t holding yours up, keeping his movements nice and slow so you could see exactly what he was doing. He gently brushed the few tears that trailed down your cheek away, smile widening as you leaned into the touch as he thought about how long it had been since somebody touched you without bad intentions. 

Frank swore in that moment he would never let anybody hurt you again and the people that had already done so were next on his list. He was going to make sure every single one of them paid the price for what they had done to you.

______

Frank Castle Taglist /

@call-me-a-fool , @sylvies4ever  @lucyysthings , @freeshavocadoooo , @writeroutoftime ,  @mrslizzyolsen ,  @avengersbabe13 , @bxmaaa , @lucyysthings , @currentobsessionrabbithole , @myguiltypleasures21 , @luluwinchester , @polyglot-noodle , @alexxavicry , @bubsonnobx , @eddiefrickenmunson , @valluvsu

August

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Prompts - 'It is August. My life is going to change. I can feel it.'

The change from July to August passed as easily as it always did, the weather was still warm, birds could still be heard chirping away and yet you couldn’t help but feel off. More than half the year had passed and it had passed without anything remarkable happening. The years had all seemed to pass the same lately and no matter how much you promised yourself this one would be different it seemed it was destined to be anything but. 

Of course just when you give up hope of something great, something remarkable happening, is often when your life changes most. 

It was a regular Monday and you were getting by on nothing but a few hours of sleep as you walked the busy streets with a hot to-go cup warming your hands, mind not completely awake just yet and not at all focused on your surroundings. It shouldn’t have been a surprise when you were suddenly jolted, nearly falling to the floor before a pair of arms caught you. 

“Oh god, I am so sorry, are you alright, love?” You looked up, eyes widening at the man holding you in the middle of a busy London street.

His voice was soft and it washed over you, calming your racing heart from both being crashed into and from the man himself, beautiful and captivating and staring at you. 

Of course, you hadn’t answered him and with a mental slap to your face you cleared your throat and answered the question, straightening up as you did, smiling as the man’s arms didn’t leave you. 

“I’m alright, thank you. Sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going.” You apologised, smiling softly at him, and watching as he mirrored the expression back, your heart seemingly skipping a beat at how beautiful the smile made him look. 

“Oh no, it’s my fault really, completely in a world of my own.” He chuckled and you couldn’t help but grin at him. “Oh bugger, your drink! Let me buy you a new one, if you’re not in a rush of course.” 

You weren’t in a rush thankfully but even if you had been you thought you would have cancelled any plans then and there if it meant being able to spend a single second longer in the man’s presence. 

“Thank you, you don’t have to though.” You told him but he just shook his head, cutting you off before you could say anything else. 

“No, no really I insist.” He told you, finally drawing his arms back with a sheepish smile and you felt the loss immediately but didn’t dwell on it, instead your smile widened as you nodded. 

“Then I’d like that, thank you.” You said and his whole face seemed to brighten up as he shifted his bag on his shoulder before nodding and gesturing for you to follow him. 

What were you doing, this was completely unlike you to go off with a man you’d just met, one that was a complete stranger and yet it didn’t seem like he was. Something about this man seemed to put you at ease, radiating safety and warmth and you were drawn to him immediately. 

You’d been saying you wanted things to change, months passed in the same old cycle and this was a welcome break in the chain. Perhaps August was the month for it. 

“I’m Steven by the way, nice to meet you.” Steven, it suited him nicely. 

“I’m Y/N,” you told him, sending him a smile back, completely unable to help the way it spread across your face as you looked at him. “It’s nice to meet you too.”

The two of you walked side by side, looking to the outside world like a pair of old friends or lovers out for a morning stroll. Steven, for all that he stammered and fidgeted, was surprisingly confident in carrying the conversation, rambling on about whatever came to his mind, asking questions about you, where you were from, what you were interested in and he responded in kind and by the time the two of you came to the coffee shop neither of you wanted to leave the others company. 

“If you’re, well, if maybe by some chance you weren’t busy would you perhaps like to have a drink?” Steven managed to ask and you felt your heart beat faster and your shoulders relax. “With me I mean.”

“Yeah,” you told him with a soft, almost fond breath of laughter as you nodded, watching as he grinned at you, “Yeah, I’d like that.”

As the two of you ordered Steven felt the ball of nervous energy in the pit of his stomach grow, completely outside of his comfort zone and yet something about you put him at ease and made it easy for him to take a breath and relax. 

It wasn’t long before the two of you were seated with drinks in front of you, Steven’s fingers tapping a steady rhythm on the sides of his cup. Somehow this felt more intimate than walking the streets of London, sitting across from each other under the low light of some hole in the wall coffee shop and yet, despite the nerves you both felt, neither of you could think of anywhere else you’d rather be.

“So where were you off to before we crashed into each other?” Steven asked with a grin and you felt yourself relax even more, glad for the easy conversation and the chance to memorise his features some more.

“I was heading to the museum, I have an interview and wanted to get there earlier to make sure I knew where to go.” You told him, watching as he seemed to perk up at the mention of the museum before his eyes widened.

“Oh god, you have an interview and I pulled you away from it. You really didn’t have to-” Steven began but you just chuckled softly, shaking your head, and cutting him off.

“It’s fine, really, my interview isn’t until after lunch, trust me I’ve got plenty of time and I’d rather be here with you than nervously pacing around the museum.” You laughed and watched as he relaxed, a soft laugh escaping him.

“You have an interview though, that’s great!” Steven beamed at you and somehow this stranger opposite you seemed just as excited as you were at the offer and you were glad to have somebody around who shared your excitement. “That’s really amazing, honestly you’ll love it, I worked there for a bit but it didn’t work out.” He told you, his nose scrunching up slightly as he shook his head and you couldn’t help but smile at him.

“Hopefully I’ll love it if I even get the job. What happened with you?” You asked and watched as he turned to look out of the window for a second before shaking his head and turning his attention back to you.

“Oh you know, had a bit of a nasty run in with a jackal and caused some property damage.” He told you, tone so serious that it drew a laugh from you and he couldn’t stop himself from laughing along with you.

“And yet somehow not the worst reason I’ve heard for being fired.” You chuckled before taking a sip from your drink.

Conversation flowed easily from there, somehow you felt like you had known this man, this stranger, for your whole life, like the two of you were long-time friends who hadn’t seen each other for a while and were simply spending time catching up on everything that had happened since you’d last seen one another, except in this case it was catching up on each other’s entire lives.

It was nice talking to Steven, nice to have somebody around who shared the same interests as you, who seemed genuinely interested and listened to every word that left your mouth. Something about Steven made you feel light, feel a happiness that you hadn’t known you had been missing. 

The man was a simply just a stranger who had happened to bump into you and yet here the two of you were, turning an accident into something that would change your futures, would steer you two down a different path, one where your lives became so entwined it would be impossible to remember a time before knowing one another.

You smiled as you listened to him talk, couldn’t help but silently thank the universe or whatever god what listening for sending Steven Grant your way, for having him knock into you and for having you leave for your interview with enough time to spare for meeting Steven. 

Mid-sentence Steven cut himself off, glancing towards the window next to the two of you again causing you to raise your eyebrows and follow his gaze but saw nothing so instead you turned back to him just in time to see his eyes widen as he looked back to you.

“It’s nearly time for your interview!” He told you and your eyes widened as you pulled your phone out, frowning down at the time, easily getting lost in the conversation with Steven and not realising how much time had passed before debating just how much your interview was worth if it meant leaving Steven’s side. 

If you hadn’t been waiting for this job to come around for months you might have genuinely left the interview but you knew you had to leave no matter how much you wanted to stay. Instead you looked back up at Steven with an apologetic look.

“I’m sorry,” You started but Steven cut you off with a smile, shaking his head fondly.

“None of that now, you have to get to your interview. I know you’re gonna smash it.” He told you and again you were almost taken back by how much this stranger seemed to be rooting for your success.

“It was really nice to meet you, Steven.” You hated that you had to leave, wanted nothing more than to sit in this cosy little coffee shop and just get to know everything about the man in front of you. Instead you started to stand but Steven stopped you before you could.

“I, oh god, don’t bugger this up now mate,” you smiled as he spoke to himself, watching in amusement as he shook his head before glancing up at you with a sheepish smile, “I don’t usually, well when I say usually I do mean ever, but anyway I don’t do this but you are really beautiful, I mean look at you, you’re stunning and I would hate myself if I didn’t ask you if I could see you again.” Steven rambled his way through his attempt to ask you out all the while your smile grew wider.

“I’d really like that.” You said, pulling your phone out again before handing it to him, “here give me your number.”

The two of you swapped phone numbers before walking out of the coffee shop together, each heading in opposite directions and pausing to say a goodbye.

“I’m really glad I met you,” Steven murmured, his eyes widening like he hadn’t meant to say the words out loud causing you to laugh softly, “I can’t wait to see you again.”

“I’m glad we met too.” You told him honestly, somehow feeling more of a connection with a man you’d known for less than two hours than with anyone else you had met in a really long time.

“I should let you go then I suppose, big interview and all that.” He smiled and you couldn’t help but mirror the expression. “Good luck, Y/N, not that you need it, they’d be stupid not to hire you.”

“Thank you,” You laughed, knowing you really had to leave now or you’d be late. “I’ll see you soon, right?”

“I should hope so, I think I’d rather like to have you in my life.” Steven said and the words were so honest that you couldn’t help the soft smile that spread across your face, feeling a soft blush on your cheeks as you ducked your head before glancing back up at him.

The two of you finally said your goodbyes, walking away with matching wide smiles before turning back to sneak one final glance at each other. It seemed after weeks, after months of pleading with the world it had finally given you an answer to your questions, a cure to the lonely, repetitive days in the form of Steven Grant. You could feel the shift when you were with him, a moment that you hoped and pleaded would be life changing, echoing Steven’s sentiment and wanting nothing more than to have him in your life.

You really hoped August was the month to change your life and really hoped Steven Grant would become a constant presence at your side. 

__________________

Steven Grant Taglist -

@bxmaaa, @captainamericasdaughter15, @daisyfreshwhore, @myguiltypleasures211, @polyglot-noodle, @alexxavicry

Safe Place

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Prompts -  'The safe place you created for me, all those years ago, that's where I call home.'

If you were to ask anyone in the galaxy who would be the least likely person to become a dad many people would have said Han Solo, especially if you asked who would be a dad to a baby girl. Han himself would have told anyone who asked that he was in no way equipped to raise a daughter, the idea alone was enough to terrify him, how could he ever raise a girl?

And yet somehow here he was, standing in the medcenter staring down at this beautiful, small baby girl that somehow fit in the palms of his hands. His eyes were watery as he stared down at you, almost like you weren’t real, and he could feel the fear that seemed to run through his whole body but somehow the fear was being drowned out slightly by the absolute and unyielding love he felt for you. 

It was an overwhelming experience, feeling so much love for somebody who had only been alive for a few minutes. To know that he would do anything you wanted, anything you asked without a second thought, to know that he would burn the galaxy down just to keep you safe and you couldn’t even do anything yet, he hated to think just how much you’d get away with once you could speak, once you knew just how much power you held over him, once you knew that you had him wrapped so tightly around your tiny little finger.

How did somebody like him make something as amazing as you?

Of course just because he felt this much love for you, just because he knew he would pull the stars from the sky for you it didn’t mean he was suddenly confident in his ability to raise a daughter, if anything feeling this love for you only made him infinitely more terrified because you deserved the whole galaxy and he didn’t want to mess that up, he didn’t want to ruin you. 

He was out of his depth, give him a blaster and a dangerous situation where the odds of surviving were slim to none and he was fine, he excelled in that. Give him the most precious baby girl in the whole galaxy and see how quickly he would crumble.

The first time he remembered being terrified when it came to you was when you were five years old. An absolute angel who was too curious for her own good, always getting into things you shouldn’t if left unattended for more than ten seconds.

One day Han had left the room to grab you some juice, he had been out of the room for less than fifteen seconds when he came back to see you with his blaster that he knew damn well he had placed out of your reach, how you had managed to get it Han didn’t know and didn’t even stop to question it.

All he felt was fear unlike any he had felt before and his blood turned cold as he ran over to you and snatched the blaster away from you, hating how you looked up at him with wide, watery eyes and a quivering lip. He couldn’t do anything, he felt frozen in fear and just about managed to grit out an order for you to go to your room.

He watched you leave the room with tears sliding down your face but he didn’t move to follow you. Han reached up and rubbed his forehead with his fingers, staring down at the blaster and mentally telling himself to hide the weapons away safely, apparently it wasn’t good enough for them to just be out of your reach now.

He waited five minutes before he left the living room and made his way over to your bedroom. The door was open halfway but he couldn’t hear you in there and felt a pit of guilt in his stomach, hoping he hadn’t scared you when he had snatched the blaster from you but he had been terrified, needing it out of your hands immediately.

If he thought he felt fear when he saw you with a blaster it was nothing compared to the fear that spread through him when he saw your bedroom was empty and that you were nowhere to be found in the house, despite him and Chewie searching the whole place and the grounds. 

Of course the one time you go missing Leia has to be off planet with the damn droid.

It wasn’t until he was doing another sweep of the house, passing by the hangar bay that he had already checked that he heard a noise that caused him to pause. He took a few steps back and stood in the doorway before his eyes landed on the Falcon, the door was closed but that noise had definitely come from inside it.

Dammit, he thought to himself. 

You knew you weren’t allowed on the Falcon by yourself, only if he or Chewie were there to supervise you and you had always followed the rule. No matter how desperate you were to board the Falcon you always waited until either of them could take you or just dragged one of them along with you so you could sit up front in the cockpit and pretend to pilot the ship.

Feeling some of his fear slip away he took a deep breath and made his way over to the Falcon and down towards the cockpit. His heart ached as he saw you in the pilot’s seat, his seat, curled up with tears still running down your face.

“C’mere,” He murmured softly, walking over to you and picking you up just enough for him to slide onto his seat and settle you down on his lap, smiling down at you as you curled into him and gripped his shirt whilst wiping your face into it. 

“What are we doing on here, huh?” He asked you, keeping his voice soft and low as he tilted your face up towards him and wiped your tears away. 

“Mad.” Was all you mumbled before hiding away against his chest and he felt himself completely soften, torn between cursing himself for acting so rashly he had scared you but also not regretting his actions because seeing you with that damn blaster had terrified him more than anything he had faced before.

“I’m not mad at you, sweetheart.” He told you, chuckling as you shook your head, “I’m not, really, just seeing you with that blaster scared me, you know it’s not a toy.” 

The two of you stayed there on the Falcon for longer than Han could recall, curled up together in the pilot’s seat long enough for you to fall asleep in his lap and Han to carry you back to your bedroom, tucking you in securely and pressing a kiss to your forehead before leaving to safely lock up the weapons.

That day seemed to have created a tradition of sorts somehow. Whenever you were sad, whenever you were scared or overwhelmed or just needed a safe place to calm down you always made your way over to the Falcon. Han never panicked anymore when he couldn’t find you, he knew all he had to do was go to the hangar and he’d find you curled up in his seat.

He remembered the fight you had with Leia, you must have only been around nine or ten. He remembered looking away from her down at you and just wondering how someone so little could hold so much anger and it wasn’t the typical anger you’d expect from a kid, nothing like temper tantrums you’d thrown before when you couldn’t make sense of your feelings. It was genuine anger, you had started showing signs of being able to use the force and Leia had wanted you to go to Luke, wanted you to be trained under her brother so you could control it.

Han hadn’t given an opinion, he’d been asked but he refrained from telling Leia how much he hated that idea, how much the thought of his little girl being sent away felt like his heart was being torn out of his chest.

Luckily for him, your distaste for the idea was loud enough to speak for Han too.

Han had known for a long time you could use the force, once the fear had left him over seeing you with a blaster and you were fast asleep he had time to think about it. He knew he hadn’t left the blaster within your reach and that there shouldn’t have been any way for you to reach it…not unless the force was involved. From then he had seen different instances of you using the force, a toy just out of reach, a cookie on the counter, a piece of meat on his plate after yours was long gone and your plate held only vegetables, no problem you’d just float whatever you wanted over to yourself.

“I don’t wanna go!” You yelled, angry tears making their way down your face and it took everything for Han not to intervene, to put his foot down on this topic and tuck you away but he knew Leia only wanted what was best for you.

“Y/N,” Leia started, her voice firm but soft but you didn’t give her the chance to speak, you let out an angry huff, already knowing exactly what she was going to say considering the conversation was just going around in circles. 

Instead of staying to listen to it you stormed out of the living room, shoving past Han who turned to watch you stomp down the hallway and made your way down to the Falcon, knowing full well your dad wouldn’t let you be alone for long but he’d give you long enough to yourself that you could calm down a bit.

“All that anger isn’t good.” Leia said softly, causing Han to finally look away from the empty hallway and back at her, a frown on his face as he shook his head.

“She’s a kid who doesn’t want to leave home. Just because she’s frustrated now doesn’t automatically mean she’s going dark side.” Han told her, tone almost dismissive in the way Leia hated when she tried to talk about something serious and she narrowed her eyes at him.

“There’s always a chance.” She told him, looking away from Han and off into the distance.

“No there’s not,” Han replied, tone hard and leaving no room for Leia to disagree with him, no room for Leia to doubt you. “She’s a good kid.”

And with that he too turned to leave the living room, leaving Leia sat alone to ponder the best course of action though it seemed to be two against one. Han made his way down the hallway, down towards the hangar, something he was sure he could do in his sleep with how often he followed you down here. 

It wasn’t long before he made his way through the Falcon and stopped to knock on the frame of the entrance to the cockpit, smiling sympathetically at you, the familiar sight of you curled in his seat still managed to warm his heart no matter the situation or how many times he had seen it.

You didn’t say anything, didn’t look up, just continued to stare out of the window at the closed door but Han didn’t let it deter him. Instead he walked in and picked you up, just as he always did and settled you on his lap, his arms wrapping around your waist as you tucked yourself under his chin.

“I don’t wanna leave.” You mumbled brokenly causing him to frown. 

“Then you’re not going to.” He told you like it was that simple and it really was, if you didn’t want to leave Han wasn’t going to force you. He was going to keep you around for as long as he could until you got too old to be spending time with your dad or hiding away on the Falcon.

“But mom said-” You began, tilting your head to look up at him but he cut you off with a smile and shake of his head.

“Don’t you worry about your mom, just leave her to me.” He said, giving you a wink that caused you to giggle and it was like the mood instantly shifted and felt a little lighter. 

Maker, he’d do anything to hear that sound instead of listening to your cries.

Han’s heart hadn’t stopped beating wildly in his chest, so loud he could hear it in his ears, almost deafening and yet you stood there rolling your eyes at him and in that moment he had never felt so unequipped to be a dad. 

“I don’t even know why you’re making such a big deal out of this, I didn’t even go that far and I’m fine.” You told him, gesturing down to yourself as if to prove your point.

“You stole the Falcon, Y/N!” Han snapped back at you, fury taking the place of the fear that had coursed through his veins at seeing both you and his ship missing. “What were you thinking?”

“I was thinking that you and mom never let me leave and I am so tired of this place! You go on adventures all the time and you never let me go with you, forgive me for wanting to see more of the galaxy!” You snarked, rolling your eyes again in a way that made him want to grab your shoulders and shake you until you realised just how reckless you had been, just how terrified you had made him.

“You can’t even fly the damn thing yet, could’ve gotten yourself killed.” And that was the thought that played on a loop the entire time it had taken him to track you down, his blood running cold as the thought refused to leave. 

Sure he’d given you plenty of flying lessons but not enough for you to take the damn ship out yourself.

“I can fly it better than you.” You shot back, knowing damn well it wasn’t true but wanting to say anything to annoy him even more at this point, unwilling to see it from his point of view, unwilling to apologise when you’d had such an amazing afternoon in a faraway village, surrounded by all different types of people.

“Kid, we both know that’s bantha fodder. There’s a reason you don’t go off on your own, you’re damn lucky to be standing there right now.” The words had you rolling your eyes again at him, and Han clenching his jaw, a disbelieving scoff leaving your lips and you shoved past him, leaving the room, and heading down to where Han had landed the ship not long ago.

Han let you go, the two of you both needing time to calm down.

It was times like this he felt so unequipped to be a dad, so completely out of his depth because on the one hand he knew you had always longed for more, longed to jump in the Falcon and search the whole galaxy. Despite your words Han had actually taken you on more than your fair share of adventures, nothing too dangerous but he couldn’t resist seeing the look of joy on your face as the Falcon made her way across the galaxy, watching the wonder on your face as you saw all kinds of species and the pride he felt when he watched you interact with them, always so polite and friendly.

On the other hand though, they’d witnessed so much, they knew there were still people out there that would love the chance to hurt them and you out alone in the galaxy was the perfect way for someone to get back at them.

He knew you understood that but he also knew you were a kid who took after the rest of her family, knew there was something more for you out there. He hoped you’d never be forced to be something more than you were, hoped that everything they’d done would be enough for you to live your life freely but the fear of something bad, something dark was always lurking in their thoughts.

Enough time passed to the point where his heart was no longer in his throat and he couldn’t hear each thump in his ears. For the first time in years, for the first time since you were a five year old little girl, he hesitated on his journey down to the Falcon, doubting for the first time that that was the place you would choose to hide away in. 

He’d always figured that eventually you would stop using the ship as your safe place, always tried to ignore the thought and the ache in his heart but couldn’t now that he thought it was actually happening. He couldn’t help but remember the last time the two of you took refuge there, couldn’t help but regret the fact he hadn’t held you tighter, hadn’t held you longer.

Still he made his way down the familiar path and felt a weight fall from his shoulders as he saw the door to the ship wide open, couldn’t help but smile despite the fight as he made his way to the cockpit to see you curled up on the seat, taking a second just take in the familiar scene just in case the day was drawing nearer that you didn’t hide away here anymore.

He made his way into the room, taking a seat on the arm of the chair and looked down at you, hating how you hesitated before meeting his eyes.

“I know you’re a tough kid and I know you can handle yourself,” Han said, tone showing how much he believed his words causing you to relax slightly, no matter how bad the fight was between you and your dad it was like being in the Falcon raised a white flag and you both agreed not to bring it onto the ship. “but you know why the thought of you out there scares the hell out of me. I can’t lose you, kiddo.”

If your eyes were a little watery, well it’s not like your dad hadn’t seen you in worse states but you still leaned forward, burying your head against his stomach as he wrapped an arm around you, leaning down to press a kiss to your hair and if he held you a bit tighter, well who could blame him?

The two of you stayed on the ship for the rest of the day after that, neither one of you wanted to leave the safety she offered and when it came time for bed you ended up in Han’s cabin, you tucked under his chin and Han was more than happy to hold you.

When the Falcon disappeared it felt like a large part of you had gone missing too, after the dark side had gotten a new leader, after Uncle Luke disappeared, blaming himself for letting one of his student’s turn to the dark side of the force, after your mom and dad went their separate ways, after the First Order had begun their attacks…all you wanted to do was hide away on the Falcon, hating that you had ever wished for something more, for an adventure. 

Now you were by your mother’s side, commanding armies and watching people you had come to care so deeply for die on a regular basis. There was nowhere that had ever felt more like home than the Falcon did and not having her around anymore saw you pushing your emotions further and further down and bottling them up tightly.

Today felt particularly bad even though nothing major had actually happened. Some days the weight of everything that was happening just felt like too much. You heard that your mom was back on base and headed outside to greet her, needing a distraction from the thoughts running wild in your mind. 

You didn’t pay much attention to your surroundings, only enough so that you could avoid X-wing pilots who ran back and forth across the base, barely avoiding getting your feet crushed by the BB unit you knew to be Poe’s causing you to tilt your head, laughing fondly as the droid knocked into people before crashing into the man he was looking for, Poe just as excited to greet the droid.

“Hey kiddo.” A voice said to the side of you, a voice that caused your head to snap around, gaze locking onto your dad before looking past him, feeling your eyes widened at the ship that stood behind him. “I brought her home.” Han said softly, watching your frozen frame and seeing the exact moment your brain started working again. 

Tears filled your eyes as you let out a slightly manic laugh of disbelief, head shaking as if you couldn’t believe your eyes before you ran to meet your dad who easily caught you in his arms, winding them around you and holding you tight against his chest, one hand coming up to cup the back of your head.

“You got her back?” You mumbled into his chest but he heard you clearly anyway.

“Sure did, kid.” He smiled, a weight falling from his shoulders as he had you in his arms again. 

You don’t know how long you stood wrapped in Han’s arms for but eventually you pulled away and smiled up at him, his hand moving to cup your cheek and bring your foreheads together. With everything going on lately it felt like heaven to not only see your dad again but for him to have brought back the place you truly thought of as home with him.

You moved away from him and took a cautious step over towards the Falcon, almost as if you expected it to disappear, causing Han to smile fondly at you. It only took a few steps, Han following behind you, until you were in the Falcon and the feeling of home overwhelmed you, memories assaulting your mind as you looked around, letting your fingers drag against the walls as you made your way further into the ship, stopping when you stood in the doorway of the cockpit.

If you thought stepping into the Falcon itself was overwhelming it was nothing compared to stepping into the cockpit. You never thought you’d be standing in here again, never thought you’d be able to find a moment's peace like the ones you had come to love in here. Somehow even despite everything going on outside, being in this room made it easier to breathe.

You didn’t realise the tears were pouring down your face until Han pressed a hand to your shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze pulling you out of your frozen state and giving you the push you needed to step foot into the room, instantly feeling better. 

Your fingers danced along the back of the pilot’s seat as you made your way around it, sitting down in the seat with a soft sigh. Han smiled over at you as he made his way into the room, taking his place on the arm of the chair, wrapping an arm around you and pulling you close, you cuddling into him without a second thought, feeling like no time had passed between now and the last time you were in here.

Of course time had passed and you had somehow found yourself fighting against the dark side, found yourself giving orders out despite being completely unequipped to handle the job and yet it was easy to block out all of that when it was just the two of you in here, easy to forget how messed up things had truly gotten. Han, like you, never thought he’d have this moment again, never thought it’d just be the two of you curled up together on your seat in the Falcon but here you were. 

There was an exhaustion that ran deep in his bones at the thought of another war. He had no idea what was going to come in the next few days, next few weeks and months. He had no idea when the next time he’d be able to sit in here with you again would be, hell he didn’t even know if there would be a next time and that thought sent an ache through his chest and caused him to pull you closer to him, his grip tightening on you like he was afraid to lose you.

“I love you, kiddo, you know that right?” He asked you, he needed to say it all of a sudden, looking down at you and smiling shakily as you looked up at him, eyes still filled with tears but you looked less tired, like this was exactly what you needed and he was glad he could give it to you.

“I know,” you murmured softly, smiling up at him and nodding, watching as his own smile widened and he let out a small huff of laughter, “I love you too.”

Yeah, Han didn’t know what was coming next. He didn’t know who was going to live to tell the stories of this war and who was going to die fighting.

Whatever happened next he’d do it for you, he’d do it for Leia. He’d given you your home back, brought her back to you and knew that if nothing else, if anything were to happen to him, he knew you’d at least have a safe place to deal with it.

Speak Now

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Prompts - I am not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on a white-veil occasion, but you are not the kind of boy who should be marrying the wrong girl

Synopsis - When Loki is forced to marry a Princess you only have two options speak now or forever hold your peace.

Falling in love with a Prince of Asgard had never been you plan, of course it was a dream many around you had but no one was foolish enough to believe it could happen and yet here you were, head over heels for the Prince who made you feel like you were something more than just a servant, a helper to the palace, made you feel like you were the most important person in all the realms. 

It wasn’t easy to pinpoint the exact moment your relationship had shifted so drastically, had changed from just a way to blow off steam into what it had become, the two of you falling hard for each other. Not that it got acknowledged, how could it? You knew no matter how much you and Loki cared for one another, no matter how much love was between the two of you, nothing could ever come from it, it was something you thought about more often than you’d like because no matter how hard you tried to push it away it always lingered.

Despite the consequences, despite how forbidden your relationship was, despite how nothing could ever come from it, you and Loki were determined to make every moment count. Now it wasn’t just about sex, it wasn’t about sharing a bottle of something to forget your troubles, instead it was about sneaking off to a quiet corner of Asgard, far, far away from anybody else and stealing magical moments together.

Some days the two of you went exploring, despite living on Asgard your whole life you had seen so little of the planet and Loki was the best guide, knowing all the secret spots that hadn’t been explored for so long. Other days Loki had set up picnics by the lakes, sometimes the two of you were content to stroll through the hidden woods or find a patch of grass and bask in the sun, you held against Loki’s chest as his hand absentmindedly played with yours. Some days you were more than happy to stay in your chambers at the palace, safely locked away from the outside world and tucked up against each other, so tangled together it was hard to see where you started and Loki ended, the day passed in a blur of softly spoken words and gentle kisses.

You knew you shouldn’t have let yourself grow attached, knew it was dangerous to fall in love with the God and yet the thing was you couldn’t stop yourself from loving him, couldn’t contain the feelings you felt. You could only stand by and feel as they grew stronger and stronger with each stolen meeting. It wasn’t spoken aloud though, Loki knew how you felt just as you knew how he felt and that was enough, it had to be enough because there couldn’t be anything else.

You knew he wasn’t yours, no matter how easy it was to pretend in the moments you had together and yet when the news broke you felt like your heart had been ripped out of your chest and immediately felt the hollow emptiness from where it had once been, felt your blood go cold and you had to fight to stay standing, to not let your knees give out. Tears filled your eyes but you had to blink them away, you couldn’t let them fall until you were back in your chambers, alone. 

“Prince Loki of Asgard is to be married to Princess Astra of Svartalfheim on the eve of the sixth day.” 

The announcement caused an immediate reaction around you, people cheered and celebrated and you had never felt more alone surrounded amongst so many. Loki wasn’t yours, he had never been. 

As you pushed your way through the celebrating crowds you couldn’t help the small spark of anger that seemed to ignite in you, a sudden emotion that contrasted so harshly with the emptiness it caused to pause for a moment before continuing to make your way to your chambers. You couldn’t help but feel betrayed, sure you knew that you and Loki had never belonged to each other, that the many months you’d spent at each other's side didn’t mean anything to anyone else but you thought they meant something to him. You hated that you’d had to hear about the news just as every other person had, you thought you at least deserved to be warned, to hear it from the man himself and yet when you had seen him only that morning he made no mention of his upcoming big day.

The second you entered the safety of your rooms your back hit the closed door and you couldn’t stay standing any longer, sitting on the floor, back against the door as the tears finally flooded down your cheeks, sobs leaving you and if anyone could hear the sobs coming from you they would send a chill down their spine. They were the kind of sobs nobody ever wanted to hear, gut wrenching and ones that spoke of true loss, of having the one person you cared deeply for ripped away from you, the person you loved snatched from your grasp.

You couldn’t say just how long you stayed curled against the door, tears finally seeming to run dry and you could do nothing but sit there, staring ahead, unseeing as your mind continued to play the news on a continuous loop that was sure to drive you insane. 

At some point you managed to drag yourself up, managed to set yourself down on your sofa but couldn’t do more than that. You couldn’t bring yourself to deal with the news, couldn’t bring yourself to do more than sit and think about everything, about how foolish you were, how somebody like you, somebody who was nothing in the eyes of royalty, had fallen for the Prince himself. It was a foolish, reckless thing and yet even with all the hurt and anger and betrayal you felt, you knew you wouldn’t take a single second of it back, wouldn’t change a single moment of your time together and if all you had left was the memories of Loki then that had to be enough. 

The frantic knocking at your door shouldn’t have startled you as much as it did but you were so absorbed in your own thoughts that you jumped at the noise. There was only one person it could be and you hesitated before standing only to stop at the door, hand on the handle debating if you should open it.

“Please Y/N,” You heard Loki call softly and had to clasp a hand over your mouth, somehow just hearing his voice was enough to bring on a fresh wave of tears. “Please darling, let me explain.”

Loki waited a moment before sighing so softly that it couldn’t be heard from your side of the door. He leaned against the wall next to your door as he began talking again, knowing that everything had fallen to pieces. How had he been at your side only a few hours earlier, easy smiles as you basked in the soft glow of the morning light, soft words spoken between you and even softer kisses shared before the two of you were forced up by your duties.

“You have to believe me, darling, I didn’t know.” Loki swore and you couldn’t help the small sob that escaped you as you listened to him. “I had no idea, not until I was called into the throne room, not until I was being introduced to her, to my new wife.” 

The last three words were snarled out, his tone shifting from that soft, light one he always seemed to use around you to one you knew was usually reserved for arguments with Odin. It gave you hope that he truly was clueless to the news, made you think he did treasure your time together as much as you did.

“You had to know I tried to fight it, to fight for us, but it’s no use, not against Father.” He sighed and frowned, you, yourself, sniffing as you tried to still your tears. “It isn’t even to secure peace between our Kingdoms, not that that would make this better but at least it would be for something. No, this is entirely Father’s doing, another way for him to control my life. I didn’t want this, my darling, if you believe nothing else I’ve said, please believe that.”

You did believe it, you had to believe it because if you didn’t then that meant that every moment you had spent together, every moment you held close to your heart had meant nothing to him. With watery eyes you took a deep breath and pulled the door open causing Loki to look up at you through wide, apologetic eyes.

Not caring about any of the palace stuff who could be loitering around their chambers Loki pulled you into his arms, the feeling of safety and warmth and home so overwhelming that tears slid down your cheeks again much to your annoyance, you were so fed up with crying and yet you couldn’t stop them from falling.

Loki held you close, tucking you under his chin and refusing to let go even as he walked the two of you into your chambers, ignoring the sofa and leading the two of you to your bed. He didn’t waste any time pulling you down, shifting you against him so you were both comfortable as you buried your face in his chest, fists clenching the fabric of his clothes as you cried and he hated he could do little else but hold you close, murmuring soft apologises as he waited for your tears to calm.

“Must you get married?” You asked him quietly, well aware of the answer and asking it anyway.

“I’m afraid I have no say in the matter.” He told you with an unamused chuckle, frowning when you looked up at him with teary eyes. “Believe me, darling, if it were up to me it’d be you walking down that aisle this weekend.”

The words that were meant to comfort you sent an ache through your chest, if it were up to you it’d be you too but both of you were powerless. Somehow Loki was a Prince and he held as much control as you, a simple commoner who happened to work in the palace. 

“I wish it were me too.” You whispered to him before burying your face in his chest, holding him tightly as if to ingrain the feeling of him into your mind because soon enough that would be all you had of him, memories, and the ghost of him against your skin doomed to haunt you for the rest of your days.

Loki’s own arms tightened around you. When he had first made his way down to your chambers he had been furious, people moved as he stalked through the corridors as he seethed at the sudden news. News, he had been informed, that had been announced to the whole Asgard as he himself heard it and all he could think of was you hearing it, thinking of the betrayal you must have been feeling thinking he had known. Now as he held you he only felt weak, he wished he could stand up to Odin, wished he could stop this marriage before it could begin but he was powerless, there was nothing he could do.

Hours passed between the two of you in silence. There were so many words that needed to be said and yet neither of you wanted to break the silence, neither of you wanted to acknowledge the truth of the situation. Here in your chambers it was easy to pretend that the outside world wasn’t there, like Loki’s soon to be wife wasn’t outside of your doors somewhere. 

But the truth was she was and in just four days the two of them would be married and soon enough to Loki you would be nothing but a distant memory whereas to you Loki would always be your everything. Loki had a duty as Prince and if Odin demanded him to marry a Princess then how could Loki argue with that.

You had always known nothing would, nothing could come of your relationship with Loki but you had always hoped for more time, hoped something would change that allowed you to keep Loki to yourself. He was a Prince though and Princes didn’t marry people like you, they married Princesses, beautiful Princesses who grew up in palaces, surrounded by every luxury someone like you could only dream about.

And yet Loki had still chosen you, he had told you he’d rather it be you walking down the aisle. You had nothing to offer him, you weren’t anything special, you had no status, no family riches or power and yet he still wanted you. He was here with you now instead of with the Princess. 

You pulled away from his chest, just far enough so that you could look up at him, watching as he smiled softly down at you before he brought a hand up to brush a stray piece of hair away from your face, his hand drifting to cup your cheek, thumb brushing delicately under your eye and you couldn’t help but lean into the touch.

“I wish it was you.” He repeated his words from earlier softly, so softly that if you hadn’t been this close to him you would have missed them. 

Instead of replying you leaned up and closed the short distance between the two of you, brushing your lips against his before he pulled you closer, deepening the kiss but keeping it soft. His hand stayed on your cheek, his thumb brushing against your skin every so often and you only pulled away when the need for air became too much, resting your foreheads together as you caught your breath.

It wasn’t fair to say it, not now. The two of you both knew how you felt, those three words didn’t need to be spoken, not when you’d both known how much more it would hurt to leave each other once those words had been said but you couldn’t just not say them. You had to say them out loud at least once, he had to hear the words from your lips, it wasn’t enough for him to just know, you had to say them.

“I love you, Loki.” You whispered the confession, eyes still closed from the kiss. 

Loki was silent for a moment and you opened your eyes, catching sight of the smile on his face, one that spoke of amazement, of overwhelming happiness at hearing those words before you were closing them again as Loki leaned down and kissed you. This time the kiss was deeper, it was wilder and messier but it didn’t go farther than that though it took both of you longer to pull away this time, the two of you panting for air as you finally separated.

“Darling, I love you,” Loki whispered back, leaning down to peck your lips a few times before pulling away but not going far, “I love you more than you could ever know. Knowing you, sharing our time together has been the best part of my life and it kills me that it won’t be you walking down that aisle. My heart aches when I think of agreeing to marry her when my heart belongs only to you. No matter what happens, it will always belong to you.”

You refused to cry, didn’t think you had anymore tears left in you but felt yourself choke up at his words. Loki didn’t give you a chance to react more than that before he was leaning down to kiss you again and you tried to memorise everything about it, how it was messy and hurried but soft, his hand still caressing your cheek as the other wrapped around your waist, holding you in place, the feeling of his hair running through your fingers as your other hand gripped the fabric of his clothes.

All too soon he was pulling away, letting his forward rest against yours as he looked at you, seemingly having the same idea of carving this moment into his mind, not knowing the next time you’d get to steal even a second alone together, not knowing if you ever would again once he walked out of your door. 

“I have to go.” He told you apologetically and you took a breath, swallowing against the lump in your throat as you nodded. “I love you, my darling. No matter what is to come, remember that I love you.”

“I love you too.” You managed to choke out and he smiled at you sadly, leaning down for one last kiss, slow and soft and lasting for an eternity but ending too quickly.

Watching Loki leave was one of the hardest things you’d had to do until it wasn’t. How could Loki leaving be the hardest thing when the Queen called upon you and other trusted members of the palace staff to help her plan the wedding?

Here you were, broken with a shattered heart, barely holding it together only to be told you had to plan the wedding of the man you were in love with. It felt like a giant slap in the face as you were forced into the same room as the Princess, forced to watch as she giggled and twirled her hair, gushing about Loki and their future, of their love.

It took everything in you to not react, to force yourself to smile and nod, to force yourself to do as the Princess commanded, as she expected from somehow so very beneath her. You were involved in so many aspects of the wedding plans, responsible for making sure the bride was kept happy whilst you tried to block out your own feelings, feelings you would only allow yourself to feel and focus on when you were alone in your chambers, spending night after night alone instead of curled up in Loki’s arms.

You already disliked the Princess but being in her presence for most of the day actually gave you a real reason to not like her. She was, without a doubt, the most entitled person you’d ever met, always demanding something and God’s forbid something wasn’t done to her standards. 

The day of the wedding finally arrived and you had seen very little of Loki. You had expected to see him quite often as you were assigned to the Princess and yet he seemed to be avoiding her, something she complained about often but you couldn’t help but smile as she ranted, a smug sense of satisfaction at knowing Loki wasn’t playing along with the wedding out of the public eye.

You walked into the room where the bridesmaids and her family were gathered in gowns that, quite frankly, were terrible. Considering the fact they were royalty you would have thought they’d be dressed impeccably and instead each person in the room wore dresses that didn’t seem right for the occasion in colours that didn’t complement them.

The Princess was yelling at one of the bridesmaids causing you to barely suppress an eye roll. You had no love for any of them, as you spent time with them you quickly realised where the Princess got her rudeness and entitlement from.

Loki deserved much better than being forced to marry her.

The Princess herself looked no better, her dress reminded you of a pastry, one of the fancy ones you’d served at many of the royal events. It seemed to swallow her small frame up, puffing out and making her look strange. Not the type of dress that would complement the suit Loki would be in at all and yet it seemed fitting for them to not complement each other, the two were so different that you couldn’t help but sigh softly, Loki shouldn’t be marrying her, she was completely the wrong girl for him but what could you do, it wasn’t like you could stop the wedding.

That thought had you tensing, standing straight as your shoulders squared back. You couldn’t stop the wedding, except you technically could. Even royal weddings asked if anybody had any reason the two should not be married and you had a whole list of them.

But you couldn’t stop a royal wedding, right?

The thought had planted itself in your head, the seed already beginning to grow until it was all you could think about and as you stood of to the side you couldn’t help but lose yourself in the daydream of actually stopping the wedding, of seeing Loki’s face when he realised he didn’t have to marry the dreadful Princess. 

As the Princess snapped your name you shook your head, forcing yourself back to reality, a reality where you would never speak up, where you were not brave enough to stand up in front of the massive crowd that had already begun to gather, people from all the realms coming together for the wedding. 

There was no way you could stop it.

And yet when you found yourself standing in the throne room, eyes locked on Loki as everyone waited for the bride to come out you wanted nothing more than to stop this whole event. He looked absolutely breath-taking, looking like the epitome of what a Prince should look like, the black suit lined with dark green detailing, nothing but the finest and richest fabric for the youngest Prince.

Loki’s eyes had immediately found you in the crowd and his mask slipped for a few seconds as his face filled with sadness, with sorrow and longing, looking for all the world like he’d rather be anywhere else. You wished he was anywhere else too, probably hidden away by your side. There was nothing you could do though except force a smile onto your face that probably came out much sadder than you intended, unable to put on a brave face for him.

Music filled the room and everybody rose from their seats, your eyes lingered on Loki for a second longer before you tore your gaze away to look at the Bride. She waved to the crowds and you barely refrained from rolling your eyes and you turned back to Loki just in time to catch the blink and you’d miss it smirk he threw your way.

Knowing he wished it was you in her place made watching her harder somehow, knowing that he was being forced into a marriage he didn’t want, especially when he had found the person he really did want to spend the rest of his days with. It made the idea of you speaking up more and more appealing but unfortunately that would have to remain a daydream.

Tears filled your eyes as the ceremony started, hearing their words, the Princess' eager and high pitched voice spoke of love and happiness whereas Loki kept his voice neutral, careful not to show his true feelings but not giving anyone the satisfaction of seeming happy with the situation. As he spoke words that had been written for him and approved by Odin he kept glancing at you, wishing he were standing up here with you, speaking true words of love and hope and of a future together. 

“We stand before these two people today to celebrate the bond and the love they share. We witness the beginning of a long and happy future, this day their promise and commitment to each other, a promise to grow old together, to stand at each other's side forever, to help each other grow stronger. There will be challenges but nothing their love cannot overcome.” 

The words of the officiant had you choking back tears and Loki allowed himself another moment of weakness as the officiant spoke of his future with Astra, let his mask fall again as he looked down, tears filling his eyes as he glanced at you. He saw you were holding it together as well as he was and wished things were different, wished some miracle would happen to get him out of this.

Gods, how he wished it were you.

You had to drown the man's words out, had to look away from the officiant, from the Princess and from Loki himself, his grief sending more pain to your heart as you tried to blink away your tears. When you glanced up you had to take a shaky breath as you met Loki’s teary gaze, the God looked miserable and heartbroken. This wasn’t what Loki deserved, he was the best person you knew, under all his posturing and defences he had the best heart of anyone you’d ever met and Odin forcing him into this made you furious.

“If there is anybody in this room that objects to this marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace.” The officiant said and you took a sharp breath as your eyes snapped over to the man. 

Loki had looked back down at this point, missing the look on your face that showed the debate you were having in your head. You only had a split moment to make a decision, stay silent and let Loki marry this girl who wanted nothing good from him, allow him to waste his days in a loveless marriage or speak now and give him the chance to leave, to come with you. Sure, it’d be embarrassing standing in front of all these people, objecting to a royal wedding but if that was the cost of Loki and your happiness then maybe it was worth it.

The only question was should you speak now or could you forever hold your peace?

Before you could even register what you were doing you were pushing yourself from your seat, gasps spread across the room as every person turned to look at you, horrified looks on each of their faces but you didn’t care, you didn’t see them. 

All you saw was Loki’s head shoot up, his eyes widening as he looked over at you, the sad, grief filled look wiped from his face replaced by a weary hopefulness and you knew in that moment you had made the right decision.

“I object.” You said, more gasps spread across the room, Odin turned to look at you with a furious look whilst Frigga had a hint of a smile on her face. Loki’s face was still the only one you were focused on watching as the biggest, brightest smile spread across his face, lighting his whole being up and you couldn’t help but smile back, missing the glare from the Princess. 

“I am not the type of person who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion, not even a little bit. I’m nothing more than some commoner who has no right to be standing here interrupting this wedding but Loki, you’re not the type of man who should be marrying the wrong girl.” The Princess let out an insulted noise of protest but neither of you paid her any mind, completely absorbed in each other as everyone continued to stare at you. “Don’t say yes to her, not if you don’t love her. Come with me instead, I’ll meet you at the palace doors and we can go wherever you want so long as you don’t say yes.”

The room was deathly quiet as every head turned to Loki as they waited for his response, surely he would tell this delusional fool that he loved the Princess and to have you thrown out for daring to object to the joyous occasion.

Instead Loki’s smile got even wider and everyone in the room gawked at him as he spoke.

“I won’t say yes to her, not when my heart belongs to you, not when you’re the one I want to spend the rest of my days with, the one I want to grow with. You are the only one for me. I’m so glad you were around, so unbelievably happy you were here when he said speak now. I don’t need you to meet me at the palace doors, we can leave together.” Loki said, his words causing you to grin as everyone looked between the two of you in utter disbelief, the Princess finally snapped back to herself and started protesting loudly, throwing her bouquet down and demanding Loki marry her.

Loki ignored her and walked away from the aisle, stopping as Odin grabbed his arm. There was only a moment but your heart stuttered, terrified at what Odin would do but Loki just shook him off and continued walking up the aisle. As he got to you he held a hand out and you beamed at him, taking his hand, and shuffling past the guests in your way.

All eyes were on the two of you as you left but you didn’t notice or care and the two of you radiated happiness as you walked out of the doors of the palace, only stopping when you saw Heimdall stood by a hovercraft, not looking the least bit surprised to see the two of you.

“Had a feeling you’d be needing this.” Heimdall said and you watched as Loki rolled his eyes but there was no malice behind the action and his smile stayed on.

“Of course you did.” He snarked causing Heimdall to laugh before gesturing for the two of you to get into the vehicle. “Thank you.”

“You are most welcome. I am glad you chose her.” Heimdall told him honestly, sending a wink your way causing you to laugh as you looked up at Loki who made his way to the front of the craft, ready to pilot it.

“As I am.” Loki smiled softly at you and the two of you said goodbye to the man just in time for a flood of people to leave the palace.

Loki grinned at you before getting the two of you as far away from the palace as quickly as possible. It wasn’t long before you pieced together where Loki was taking you, it was a place the two of you had found two months into seeing each other, a small cabin far from anywhere else. The place hadn’t been used for many years but you and Loki had spent many afternoons cleaning it up and many more nights there together. 

You couldn’t think of a better place to start the next chapter of your life with Loki, one that you knew would be filled with all the things the officiant had spoken about, one to be filled with love and trust and happiness, one where you could grow together, to better each other and start your future together.

You were really glad you had trusted your gut and spoke up, knowing that you never would have been able to hold your peace, not when it meant robbing both you and Loki of the future you both deserved.

_________

Loki Taglist /

@book-fic-reader​, @dirtytissuebox​, @countryday​, @mowestruc​, @alluringshawn​, @beefyjamesbarnes​, @vi0lenceandperfume​, @hankgreenspelicanstrapon​, @wildxwidow​, @stand-tall-pineapple​, @buckystrash​, @ca-mics​, @imjustassaneasyouare-blog​, @thecovenmember​, @dindjarinsspouse​, @anastas2904​, @xxxeatyourh3artoutxxx​, @cuupiid​, @rottenstyx​, @mads-weasley​, @queen-who​, @rosie-posie08​,

@poeticsorcery​, @filmsbyblair​, @halepack2011​, @lonelygodsmuse​, @cinderellacauseshebroke​, @black-rose-29​, @dordors11​, @classyunknownlover​, @fanf1ctionwrit1n​, @hayden429​, @kodiakwhiskey​, @chaoticevilbakugo​, @cleardetectivechaos​, @onyourgoddamnleft​, @siriuslyfearless​, @taecube​, @alwaysclassyeagle​,  @asherhunterx​, @ordinarylokix​, @carmellasworld​, @lokismidnight​, @benhardyslut​,  @jasontoddthezombie​, @serrendiipty​, 

@obsessed-with-marvel​, @father-violet​, @mystic-writings, @urbestgrrrl, @randomwriter1021​, @sylvies4ever​, @kaitieskidmore1, @hydeonysus, @nobody7102, @fangirl-and-her-fantasies, @mrslizzyolsen, @allthingsmarvellove,  @inas-thing, @kallielikecali, @xxchaotic, @lovelyvante, @standarizedpumpkins, @ukai-hoe, @bxmaaa, @gypsytraveler86-blog, @cwritesforfun, @paintlavillered,  @captainamericasdaughter15, @luluwinchester​, @alexxavicry, @bubsonnobx, @midnightsmelodies, @eddiefrickenmunson