Headcannon: Columbo Has Received The Curse Of Cassandra And Instead Of Prophesying He Just Quietly Collects

Headcannon: Columbo has received the Curse of Cassandra and instead of prophesying he just quietly collects evidence. That's why he's so persistant about making a perfect case, and if possible, making the culprit him/herself personally admit guilt. Nobody has to take his word for anything.

Supporting evidence: "Columbo's Wife Isn't Real" is such a widespread tv theory despite there not being any implication that she's fake in the show. Columbo said she's real. Repeatedly. Why don't you trust him, hmmm?

starting a forbidden Columbo merch collection, feel free to add

Girl help, job market got me genuinely considering becoming a party clown. In the 90's kids' programming world, that was the literal rock bottom.

Sometimes self-care is hitting Count Dracula with a shovel 

The woman at the beginning of Dracula, specifically the one that gave Jonathan a crucifix, tells Jonathan to take it for his mother's sake.

At first this seems like nothing more than a spooky phrase simply there to add to the horror of the novel.

But then, we learn that Dracula has been stealing children from the villagers.

Do you think that woman had lost her own child to Dracula? Do you think she saw Jonathan, a man just barely graduated from college, on his first ever business trip, and saw her own child in his eyes?

I wonder. Would her child be his age if they were never taken?

Define "is"

is the chicken ethically sourced

define ethical