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Boring Day At Work Where The App I Use To Do My Job Isnt Working; Have A Picture Of My Cat That My Partner
Boring day at work where the app I use to do my job isn’t working; have a picture of my cat that my partner took. His name is Horacio and he’s a little cutie and a lying bastard

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More Posts from Lordnpc
This is so good! I love it 😻
Final Upgrade (NSFW)
Link needs just a bit more defense to his armor before he can take on Ganon, so he goes to the fairy who knows best.
Link x Cotera (The Great Fairy)
Link stared up at the gates of Kakariko village, the golden eye staring back at him menacingly. It had been a long time since he had been here, so much had changed since then. With the Divine Beasts calmed, all that was left was to face Ganon himself.
For many moons, Link had trained. His body hardened and his strength saw new heights. Despite this, he still felt a chill go down his spine whenever he looked toward the castle. Zelda needed him, yet he felt he needed just a bit more help.
Walking through the village took his thoughts back to the beginning of his journey when he was small and weak, his clothes torn, and his memory fractured. A sense of new and old familiarity washed over him. The nostalgia was a welcome feeling compared to the dread he typically felt.
However, his reminiscing wasn't long-lasting. He wasn't here for the village, merely passing by in order to progress his journey. He was back to visit an old friend who had powers untold to any Hylian.
Link looked past the Shrine, a faint glow in the distance enticing him further down the path, light jingling and bubbling water drawing him in like a siren's call. Approaching the fountain, he took a moment to collect just a few small fairies, three more lives to bring an end to Calamity.
As link stepped upon the pastel mushrooms, the water in the fountain began to bubble, and out forth sprung a giant woman, blonde hair framing her face. She let out a cry that one could argue to be erotic as she sprung forth. Link tried, and failed, to suppress the blush that slowly crept upon his face as her barely-covered breasts swayed at his eye level.
"Oooooo~ Link!" She cried, resting her chin upon her hand. "It's been soooooo long. Why haven't you come to see me, dear?"
Link only shook his head, trying to avert his gaze from Cotera's beauty, but failing miserably. Her pale, dew-covered skin glittered with an almost unnatural shimmer. The jewels "covering" her chest reflecting the light.
"Ahh, never mind. You've come back, and that's what matters. Allow me to enhance your clothing once more?"
Link pulled at the green tunic on his chest.
"Hmmmmm? Sweet boy, my sisters have already enchanted that to the best of our abilities. I'm sorry, love, but it's as strong as it can be." Cotera shook her head sadly, as she leaned down to rest her head upon her arms, face only about a foot away from Link's.
He looked down, dejected. He signed, and nervously pulled at the front strands of his hair, what was he to do now? Was it time to stop stalling? Was he stalling? Hyrule needed him, and here he was panicking.
Link's spiraling was halted by a large, painted nail drawing his chin closer to Cotera's. "Oh, my boy, I just remembered, there is ONE thing that I may be able to do. But, it requires a special material, one only you can provide."
Link's eyes sparkled as a large smile grew on his face. Yes! Progress! He nodded his head enthusiastically as he pulled his bag off his shoulders, and began dumping its contents out at his feet.
Cotera's giggling halted his digging, as he turned up with confused eyes at her. "No, sweet boy, nothing in your sack will do. We must MAKE what I need." Link tilted his head in confusion, causing Cotera to giggle once more. "Ohohohoho, here, love, take these off," Cotera pulled at his green pants with one of her nails. Link shook his head, and pointed to his tunic, and stripped that off instead.
"Ohohoho, sweet, sweet boy. I'll enchant your tunic, but first, you must take off the trousers," Cotera once again pulled at the pants, Link's face flushed even more, and he stripped down fully, exposing himself to the Fairy. He tried to suppress the blood that had begun to flow away from his head, and was only half successful in doing so.
Cotera's eyes immediately shot down to his growing erection, and an almost evil smirk grew on her face. She snatched him in her palm, bringing Link to her face. "You catch on quick, my love," she whispered as she gave him a kiss that covered his entire head. She rested him against her palm and her chest, as she ran a nail up and down the length of his body. "Have you caught on to what we must do?"
Link nodded, as he finally allowed himself to get harder. It didn't take much, as that was a battle he was losing anyways.
"Ooo~ Good boy!" Cotera cooed, as she moved her large finger down to Link's erection. The tip of her finger was about as wide as his hips, and she was careful not to scratch him with one of her well-manicured nails. She gently applied pressure to his cock, swaying her finger up and down. The weight around his member made Link twitch and moan quietly.
Cotera lifted her finger for just a moment, setting Link free and allowing him to roll his body off her hand and between her bosom. Link sank his back into the soft plushness of the large breasts, and let himself sink between them.
The Great Fairy looked down and laughed as Link kneaded her breasts while his cock twitched, somehow getting even harder than he already was. "You're lucky, boy, do you know how many men have drowned trying to get to where you are right now?"
Cotera's words fell upon deaf ears as the Hylian had reached a hand down between his legs and began to stroke himself, all was lost to him besides the ecstasy that he was engulfed in. Cotera rolled her eyes and reached a hand back to undo the bra she was wearing, exposing the rest of her chest. She plucked Link from between her chest and let him stand on her palm, head next to her nipple. He opened his mouth as wide as he could in order to fit the bud into his mouth, and in the back of his mind her noted how she tasted like the sweetness of a fairy tonic, and he felt a surge of life flow through him.
As Link's mind was lost to all but the large breasts in front of him, Cotera took her fingers to her mouth, sucking upon them for a moment before bringing them back down to Link's cock. The warm wetness of her fingers engulfed him once more, and his knees buckled with pleasure. He managed to hold his balance by throwing his weight back upon her soft breast once more, holding on for dear life as his balls were massaged by silky fingers.
It ended almost as quick as it began, as Link shot ropes of cum against Cotera's chest and fingers, but just when he thought it was over, Cotera began to stroke him once more.
"Oooo~ Not so fast, Linky. I'm going to need a lot more than that to enchant this. I need you to be all nice and strong for me." Link's mind was blank from overstimulation, but he still managed a small nod before falling onto his back as Cotera continued her demonstrations.
Link wasn't sure how many times he came, he didn't know if it had been minutes or hours that Cotera had spent milking him of all his vitality (it was probably minutes), but he eventually found himself all but passed out in Cotera's palm, covered in her spit, and his own sweat and semen. Cotera giggled as she ran her finger up the length of his shaft once more, causing a shudder to run down his entire body.
"Don't worry sweet boy, I shall return your strength to you..." She cooed as she gently lowered his limp body into the warm fountain in which she resides. The bubbles lifted his heavy body up as if he was weightless, and he felt the twitching and soreness in his legs and hips subside as energy and life flowed back into his body. He took a moment to revel in the peace and tranquility that overtook him, before wadding out of the fountain and onto the large petals that surrounded it.
He looked toward Cotera with a large blush on his face. If he wasn't stark naked at this moment, he would have believed it all to be a hallucination.
"You did so well, love," Cotera said as she reached for his forgotten clothes. "You gave me much more than I needed, I think I can make both your trousers and tunic stronger." The fairy took the clothes and dipped them into the water, which bubbled and shimmered with her power. They sparkled as she lifted them out, miraculously dry. "All finished! Is there anything else you need enhanced, boy?" Cotera asked as Link began to put his clothing back on, feeling the new strength that had been woven into the fibers leech into his body, filling him with vigor.
However, despite this new strength, the idea of more sent a shudder down his spine. Both a good and bad shudder, despite feeling physically fine, he wasn't sure he would be able to cum anymore for at least a month.
"Ooooh... What a shame..." Cotera sighed as Link shook his head. "Supposed I'll just have to wait for more... Well, goodbye Linky~"
Cotera sunk herself back into her spring with a laugh that would make any Hylian weak to the knees, and Link smiled as he walked back toward the village, feeling like a new man.

"Fiction effects reality" -antis
That's rich coming from you. Somebody will ship FICTIONAL characters and you will send death threats and rape threats to the REAL person who made them. You will make a video saying "if you're a proshipper, then I ship you with your dad" like the people you're 'shipping' isn't a REAL person and their REAL dad. You will comment under a FICTIONAL child x child drawing/fanfic saying "that's cp!!" and disrespect and mock REAL CSEM survivors. Proshippers existed long before the term 'antis' was even a thing. But then one day, antis, Every Fandoms 1# Hypocrite, started policing and ruling all fandoms on what they can and can't make ships of, headcanons of, fanfics of, etc etc.
Antis, my brother in Christ, YOU ARE THE PROBLEM.
Need magic potion to become a shota. Then need to find mermaid or lamia who would cherish me. Then become house husband of said monster girl
Is that so much to ask?
It's literally not buddy, I think it's the worlds kodocon-phobic agenda that's stopping us from achieving our dreams 😔💔 can't have Shota, can't be Shota, can't have nothing in this economy.
ALSO REAL. just tiny house husband of your kind of intimidating monster wife?? The dream... If I was a Shota I would be batting my lashes, acting all clingy and sweet to the strong monster girls calling them "big sis" hehe (∩´∀`∩)
I'm a wimp AND a simp tho so she wouldn't even need to cherish me she could use me like a chewtoy-
Also lamia/mermaids are SO BASED. my fave monsters. i actually started writing fanfics because of them. Side note: I THRIVE during mermay, which is why I think we should like either include lamias/nagas with mermay or give them their own month. Like nagavember? Add lamia to that, cuz in my ethnic culture it's actually naga who are the half snake people, but in the country I've been born and raised in, people recognize and use lamia more, so maybe they have some differences, but they're similar no? So nagavember. I'm making that official now if it doesn't already exist.
This very much feels like it’s part of a phenomenon I like to call “Coffee Shop AU-ification” of RPGs. Where some people only get into the game because it’s trendy and chic (which is also why D&D maintains such a tight hold despite all the controversy)
It’s sanding off any friction or complication from play, just to get to the banter and stuff. This advice feels like those people saying “Hey, we all know that we’re gonna win. Can’t we just skip this so that I can continue my RP?”
I’ll leave off saying that if you use TTRPGs to just have fun RPing with your friends, that’s fine! Just acknowledge that other people don’t have to like it
My least favourite GMing "hack" that gets passed around is "make puzzles/riddles with no fixed answer, and then whatever answer the players guess, make that the right answer."
If the game I'm running is going to have riddles, it's because I have players at the table who... like riddles? And for those players, the fun of a riddle is the moment where it clicks and you get the satisfaction of figuring it out. Which just isn't likely to happen if the riddle is just some vague, evocative nonsense that validates whatever guess they make.
So, presumably, this hack is for making riddles for a table full of only people who do not like riddles. Which invites the question, "why are you making riddles for a table full of only people who do not like riddles?" Do you just feel obligated to?
I guess if so, then here is my hack for you: I absolve you. You are no longer obligated to include riddles in your game of people who don't like them. Go forth, my child, and riddle no more.