Day 23 - Did The Media Report Play A Role In Your Wanting To Lose Weight?

day 23 - did the media report play a role in your wanting to lose weight?

yes. kind of. not as much as it did with other people, but of course it affects my mental state.

long story short- yeah.

day 16 - when did you first decide to lose weight? 

i think i was like 11. i was always a big eater, my whole family kinda gave me that label when i was really young. also, my friends were smaller than me as well, so when i first noticed that i was determined to lose some pounds, but it wasn't unhealthy at all, i just cut some sugars and stopped eating junk food, and my intentions were never to become this person, i started to develop bad eating habits like a year and a half after that. 

Height: 164cm
Weight: 46,3 kg

day 24 - how do you feel about the terms pro-ana/pro-mia?

if you have ever wished, encouraged or promoted any disordered behaviour to anyone else in the past you have the benefit of the doubt. if you continue to do this or feel no remorse at all, you are a terrible person and i genuinely think that you deserve everything bad and unfortunate that happens to you.

you don’t need to tell someone to stick their fingers down their throat to be pro, it’s enough for you to shame them bc of what they look like, judge their intake or give unsolicited “advice” when it comes to weight and eating. even if this person asks you to, it is not (and unless you are a professional and the conversation takes place in the right context), and NEVER will be your place.

if you romanticise the terms “anorexia” and “bulimia” (whether you suffer from them or not) i have no respect for you. i would never shame someone for having a mental illness. regardless, i do not think that they’re something you should be proud of or promote.

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im all up for building a community that is non-judgemental bc i get how lonely and isolating an ed can be. i don’t think that having an ed blog makes you pro. but let’s not forget that even if we don’t mean to, we all take small part of someone else’s struggle, it’s your choice if you want to become a good or negative one.

my aunt just got these for me.

i can’t wait for them to be too big.

day 19 - when was the last time you ate fast food?

aproximately 2 months ago. my uncle brought pizza and i chewed and spat what i could but my sister was starting to notice so i swallowed some bits, i purged it like 15 mins later that day, so...