And On A Similar Note, I Dont Think Bruce Yells Except In Very Specific Situations.

and on a similar note, I don’t think Bruce yells except in very specific situations.

like I don’t think he yells around the house when he’s annoyed or when the kids are pissing him off. he’s more of a lecture guy. so much so that the kids compete every year to see who gets the longest lecture. the winner gets some sort of bat themed merch (it changes every year. last year Duke got a pair of boxers with the bat symbol across the ass)

BUT

when Bruce is scared, he gets loud. He’ll yell about “how could you be so reckless” and how “I need you to be better than this.” It’s how the kids know they’ve really freaked him out.

the first time Dick gets yelled at by Bruce, he’s 10. He was jumping rooftops too fast and slipped. Bruce catches him by the cape, drags him back to the batmobile, and totally dresses him down.

Dick bursts into tears. Not because he’s scared, but because he can feel the fear rolling off Bruce in waves. and it feels so wrong for Bruce to be that scared because he’s The Batman and he’s not supposed to be scared of anything.

anyway. Bruce’s fear is loud.

whenever the batfam has an interview that they really don’t want to do they just sick whoever is the most exhausted on that poor interviewer

it’s a lot of incoherent ramblings about whatever case they’re working on (usually complaining, but it’s hard to tell. even the best listeners can’t decipher what they’re saying) and grumbling about how ‘Damian bit them’.

Tim deciding to play some popular horror games after his nightly patrol because insomnia is a bitch (and also why not? what could possibly go wrong)

Kon, jumping through his bedroom window: Tim! I heart your heart rate accelerating! Is everything okay?

Tim, screaming at the top of his lungs: HOLY FUCK YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME

Every once and a while, the Batkids will try and pretend to be Bruce over the radio whilst on patrol.

Tim (as low and gravelly as he can go): "Oracle! Analysis!" Barbara (nonplussed): "Red Robin, I can see which channels are lit up when you speak, I know that's you." Tim: "I AM THE NIIIIIIIGHT...!"

Batman is not pleased. The kids only do this more.

I fucking loved when Logan read Wade to filth before their homoerotic fight in the Honda Odyssey.