spoiler-alert-andabunchofnumbers - There Will Be Spoilers
There Will Be Spoilers

And a bunch of random numbers. I will post whatever fandom I'm in at the moment without rhyme or reason

80 posts

A Small PSA To All Those New To Dealing With The Porn Bots That Tumblr Now Has A Fresh Wave Of I Understand

A small PSA to all those new to dealing with the porn bots that Tumblr now has a fresh wave of – I understand that when you go to report them, you want to report them as "[containing] sexually explicit material", but don't do that. Report them as spam instead.

These are spam bots flooding tags and the website in general with spam links. They often do not have anything sexually explicit on their blog (although they often have implicit material). Plus, these two reports get very different results. Reporting explicit material gets the bot slapped behind an 18+ wall, so minors can't check if they're a bot or not. Reporting spam gets the bot taken down.

Remember, folks: when dealing with a bot, report spam, not smut!

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More Posts from Spoiler-alert-andabunchofnumbers

Okay but like,

In the beginning of the game, Nora (Estheim) is killed by a Skytank explosion behind her while she's kneeling to help Snow after saving his life.

Okay But Like,

There are those who hate on the scene for quickly killing her off, but like man that's a woman who just went on vacation with her son and ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time, who was brave enough to join the other Purge victims in trying to fight back because yes, she's a mom, but she'd rather go out fighting with the people actually willing to help keep them alive in this desperate situation where there own government and entire planet turned against them for no reason other than bad luck.

Snow failed to save her because he didn't manage to keep his grip on her; Nora was injured and she gave him her last request because she had given up at that point. Snow looks at his hand in the aftermath because letting Nora fall alone was his biggest mistake.

Some point out that Snow survived the exact same fall as Nora, but barring the fact that he's a 6 foot 7 inch man who is also a fit fighter and she is a mother who lives in a peaceful city, the idea is actually supposed to be that if Snow hadn't let her go and had shielded her body with his - MAYBE SHE WOULD HAVE SURVIVED.

We don't know, certainly, and Snow is definitely still injured after his fall and stumbles as he gets up. He's traumatized by all of the people who died under his command; NORA the gang is equipped to fight, but they've never fought in an actual war before, much less against their own government. But Nora is the one who died closest to him, to the point that she told him she had a son she wanted him to protect. He needs to keep going for Serah, but he and Gadot specifically go and check to make sure all the kids are okay - under the logic that if he instructs his crew to keep all of the kids safe, that'll keep Nora's son safe by default. He can't do any more than that for her, and it's killing him, but he has to shove it down because there are more people - especially the one he loves - relying on him to keep going.

And then he has to keep going. He uses Serah's wishes to give himself a reason to keep going. No time to process his guilt because he has to keep going.

But then, the beautiful scene in Palumpolum happens.

Okay But Like,

Hope is blasted by a Skytank explosion from behind as he's kneeling to end Snow's life, a direct parallel to how Nora DIED.

In that moment, Snow doesn't care that Hope is trying to kill him. This time, he doesn't hesitate to dive off the ledge after Hope to catch him and shield him with his body and make sure that Hope isn't falling out of his grip. The fall is brutal, Snow is nearly crippled from the damage, but Hope is ALIVE, and can you imagine how that makes Snow feel?

Sure, the drop was probably shorter than in the Hanging Edge, but beyond the regular reaction to Snow finally facing his guilt and acknowledging he was running, still picking himself up and dragging Hope up a ladder back to the apartment levels, I just love the parallels in that scene. Snow finally got to save Nora's son, and he's fully willing to face the consequences of his actions.

Then, Hope is able to come to terms with his own running and denial. He had admitted multiple times that killing Snow won't bring her back, but he needed to keep going. And Snow knew his optimistic attitude led people to their deaths and smiling even in horrible situations was awful from other (Hope's) perspectives, but he had to keep going.

Don't ever tell me that there aren't great character arcs, developments, and nuances in FF XIII.


Tags :
CRISIS CORE FINAL FANTASY VII REUNION (2022) Dev. Square Enix MOOGLE POWER
CRISIS CORE FINAL FANTASY VII REUNION (2022) Dev. Square Enix MOOGLE POWER
CRISIS CORE FINAL FANTASY VII REUNION (2022) Dev. Square Enix MOOGLE POWER
CRISIS CORE FINAL FANTASY VII REUNION (2022) Dev. Square Enix MOOGLE POWER
CRISIS CORE FINAL FANTASY VII REUNION (2022) Dev. Square Enix MOOGLE POWER
CRISIS CORE FINAL FANTASY VII REUNION (2022) Dev. Square Enix MOOGLE POWER

CRISIS CORE FINAL FANTASY VII REUNION (2022) dev. Square Enix ↳ ✨ MOOGLE POWER ✨


Tags :

A Long Rant About Why Hope and Snow’s Arc is Brilliant

"You've changed, haven't you? Seems like you've toughened up."

"I'm a l'Cie. I had to."

"The only ones that ought to be fighting the army…are us dumb grown-ups."

"You think it's stupid to fight?"

"It is if you get killed. Anyway, just lay low. Let the dummies duke it out. The army's no match for NORA, right?"

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"He was…he was smiling!"

Let's talk about this. LET US TALK ABOUT THIS!

In just one scene this game managed to make you believe that Hope and Snow are going to implode.

Right before this, when Hope was with Lightning, Hope was on the path to healing. He'd confessed what happened to his mother - for the first time since the incident, I might add, - and how much he hates Snow. The Gapra Whitewood alone is amazing but let's stay focused.

Lightning and Hope are brilliant together, with Lightning seeing what her influence as a role model is doing to an innocent kid. She's a maternal figure, both to her sister and eventually to Hope, but she's been running from her failure to save and believe in her sister as well as losing her entire home and identity. She finally realizes that the warpath she's on is unhealthy and the wrong path for her. Maybe she'd succeed in toppling the Sanctum, maybe she wouldn't have, but an enemy and a goal are things she can kill and accomplish.

The only problem is Hope. When she gives him the advice that she herself is following, to control her emotions, find an end goal and block out everything else, she starts to see how unhealthy her choices are both physically and mentally. She's sent Hope on a warpath, and when she finally announces that "I made a mistake!", Hope is still left angry, thinking there's nothing left if he doesn't have anyone to fight. Hope is shouting at her "Then what battles do we fight? And against who?!"

When she finally convinces Hope to calm down, he says "I'm sorry, I messed up" and you can feel his anger slowly fading as he regains his reason. At the end of that section, Hope's final words are, "Snow believed Serah, didn't he?" That one line demonstrates how Hope is willing to see past his first impressions of Snow and listen to who he is as a person, that maybe Snow really was just trying to save everyone. Both Lightning and Hope together are on the path to forgiving Snow and healing for their own sake.

Then, the next scene happens. They're reminded of how little hope they have of surviving, how they're on the run, how Rosch reminds the army that they aren't people, they're targets. Lightning immediately volunteers to sacrifice herself if it will give Hope a chance to live and find himself in whatever time he has left - "You survive."

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Snow was a bonus, since she doesn't want Hope with her while she takes on the whole army and draws their fire so Hope can get away, but leaving him with Snow is safer than bringing her with him. She chucks him at Snow saying "Take care of him", knowing Hope will be uncomfortable but he'll be protected. She likely didn't account for Fang following her and hadn't intended Hope to be left alone with Snow.

Fun bonus is that when Hope is thrown off of Shiva and the soldiers converge on him, Hope rises to his feet and is already in a battle stance. When Snow last saw this kid, he cowered at nothing but the hopelessness of their situation, much less a soldier aiming their weapon at him, but now Hope was fully ready to kick those guys' butts if Snow hadn't intervened. And so began the slow descent as Hope started seeing everything he hated in Snow - Snow automatically assumed he couldn't defend himself, that Snow needed to save the day.

Hope had begun to forgive Snow, hearing Lightning coming to the realization that he believed Serah when no one else did and believed in her when she was ready to give up because of her fate. Then Snow is back in his arrogant glory, treating Hope like a kid because he hasn't seen all the growth Hope has gone through. Lightning treated him like a kid until Odin happened and she started properly supporting him to grow stronger rather than just "babysitting" him. She talked to Hope like he was an adult with a little less life experience - which is how you should be treating a kid as smart as Hope.

Then the scene comes up.

But Snow keeps calling him "partner" in their battle quotes and taking charge when Hope clearly already knows what he's doing now thanks to Lightning.

Hope is a bit confused at where Snow's been and what he's been up to with a branch of the army trying to kill them, but he's passive aggressive at best. Just because he doesn't want to kill Snow anymore doesn't mean he has to like him. Snow does not get the hint, still seeing Hope as just a kid and he has a right to teen angst considering all he's been through.

"The only ones that ought to be fighting the army…are us dumb grown-ups."

From Snow's perspective: he's telling Hope that kids shouldn't have to go through such a horrible thing, to have the whole army training their guns on you and calling you nothing but a target. Hope shouldn't have to be running for his life, taking on the military that's supposed to be protecting citizens and kids like him. Adults are just dumb like that, getting ourselves into trouble. Kids should be smarter than that - be smarter than that, Hope.

From Hope's perspective: Snow just called any adult who tries to fight the army a fool - including his mother when she volunteered to help fight their way out of the Purge. She fought because Snow asked for volunteers (he knows but often forgets that her main reason for joining was to keep Hope safe; Snow hadn't even thought of asking for volunteers until a bunch of people asked to help them). He just called Nora a fool for fighting to save Hope’s life at Snow’s behest.

"You think it's stupid to fight?"

"It is if you get killed."

Whew we're just gonna stop right there mid-sentence. In those two sentences we managed to create two sides of a conversation that perfectly encapsulate the miscommunication between Hope and Snow that’s driving a 14-year-old kid into a murderous rage even after he'd begun a path to healing.

Snow just called adults stupid for fighting the army, then he goes and pushes it further by saying that it’s only really stupid if you get killed. From Snow's perspective, this is a perfectly reasonable thing to say. It helps no one if you run into battle and get killed - no matter if it's just your life on the line or if you have others you're trying to protect. The people you're trying to protect don't necessarily benefit from your sacrificing yourself by throwing yourself at the enemy in a desperate kamikaze, and Hope himself shouldn't just give up on his life even when the army has them outnumbered and they have no plan - he'll find hope to go forward, he should never just give up and go out in a blaze of rageful spite.

From Hope's perspective, that idiot just insulted his mother! He just called Nora stupid for fighting the army even though she had multiple good reasons to have volunteered - Snow asking for volunteers and putting civilians into the line of fire (even though they were already and Nora joined for Hope and it was entirely her choice). Then he calls her especially stupid because she got herself killed.

In essence, Snow just voiced the thoughts of everyone who hates on Nora's character in general. “She was a MOTHER, what was she DOING volunteering to FIGHT, “Moms are tough”? psssh she DIED, what an idiot.”

I was angry for Hope in that moment, man. I was ready to stab Snow too.

image

"Anyway, just lay low. Let the dummies duke it out. The army's no match for NORA, right?"

Ooof, and then we have the final line where Snow uses the name NORA as his acronym for "No Obligations, Rules, or Authority." As Lightning had told Hope in the Gapra Whitewood, (let me quote the datalog entry for that moment): “They wish to live without restrictions, she explains, though some might argue that what they really wish is to live without responsibility.” This means that Snow just used NORA in the context of ignoring the responsibility of those who he himself brought into the battle under his leadership. He was in charge of those volunteers, including Nora, but now he acts as though he’s forgotten all of the weight of their deaths that were directly or indirectly his fault.

So in conclusion, Snow just insulted Nora Estheim in three different ways in the span of one short conversation. Nice going, bud.

To be clear, it’s made very obvious in the beginning that Snow is absolutely crushed by the guilt of everyone who died under his command. Nora in particular has traumatized him because he blames himself for letting her fall out of his grip (see this post for that rant). Snow isn't a children's cartoon character telegraphing his every thought and the lesson you need to learn from him; he's repressing his feelings and he's very good at hiding it. He is brilliant at acting like he's happy and fine and running away from the guilt because if he let it crush him, more people would get hurt because he was too distracted and didn't protect them.

His breakdown when Hope presses him explains the final puzzle piece: he didn’t know how to possibly atone - so he just kept avoiding it.

“There is nothing that can make something like that right again. When someone’s dead, when someone’s gone, words are useless…I know! It’s all my fault! But I don’t know how to fix it! Where do you start? What do you say?”

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When Hope finally wakes up, Snow has finally come to terms with his guilt and confesses it outright. It was his fault Nora died, he shouldn’t have said a lot of what he said before about words being useless, how he could never make up for someone dying so he needed to keep going.

“I thought if I couldn’t make up for it, then all the apologies in the world wouldn’t mean thing. So I decided I had to find a way to pay for it first, before I’d even have the right to say sorry. But, it’s like you said. I was using that as an excuse, so I could run from my own guilt.”

Snow finally acknowledges that he’s been running, that Nora’s death is his fault, and notice that he hands Hope Lightning’s knife, telling him to dish out any punishment he wants. Hope could kill Snow right then and there, but instead, he just finally confesses, “She’s gone, Snow.”

image

Hope closes the knife. He lets go of his hate.

Let’s quote the datalog again, because no one likes reading except me, apparently, but the datalog has genuinely brilliant writing: “He didn’t survive this long to see revenge - he saw revenge as a means to survive.”

Palumpolum concludes three character arcs:

Lightning

She admits how she snapped from losing Serah and her life all at once and went down a dangerous warpath (dragging Hope along with her)

She finds a new goal in surviving to see Serah wake up

She apologizes to Snow!

Hope

He gathered the strength to pin the blame on Snow despite knowing it was the Sanctum’s fault for killing her, despite knowing killing him wouldn’t bring her back

He acknowledges that he went down the wrong path, even if he did it to survive

He accepts his mother’s death

He forgives Snow

Snow

He admits that Nora’s death is his fault and that he’s been running from the guilt of not only her but many who died because of him

He was too overwhelmed by the idea that he didn’t know how to atone for his actions, so he just kept avoiding his responsibility

He faces the consequences, apologizes even knowing that it won’t fix everything

Anyway, if you made it this far, here’s a picture of some chocobos and sheep just hanging out in order to form a barrier:

image

On the next edition of Final Fantasy XIII actually had really good character arcs: Sugar and Rainbows


Tags :

Okay we're adding one to the list!

DarkHorse - Barnabas and Sleipnir (Odin and...his horse egi)

(Also a decent Katy Perry song)

I need to mini-rant tho:

When Sleipnir revealed his name I was laughing like "HE'S THE HORSE HOLY SHIT" and it was so appropriate in so many ways. The greatest thing about Sleipnir is that he never has a third-act breakdown when he gets beat, he's just happy to be defeated, never loses his swagger that guy.

However, considering the fact that Barnabas considered defeating Sleipnir an impressive feat, it's implied that that version of Sleipnir never died before, and when the Sleipnir army comes to fight the gang I don't think any of them speak! I think that means that the original Sleipnir had evolved a personality and individuality from experience living so long, something Barnabas wasn't able replicate in the other egi who were silent and just there to be mass-produced in a fight.

This suggests Barnabas didn't even care for the best version of Sleipnir when he died, a version he could never replace even with all the clones. Meanwhile that original Sleipnir isn't afraid of death for his master's sake and was built to be utterly loyal to Barnabas and he doesn't feel bad about it in the slightest and this is such a fucked up relationship and yet I wouldn't want to change it in any context because it works???

Sleipnir is completely unfazed by anything, both as an overpowered non-human badass but also as an evolved egi, plus I love his voice and his character design (don't put on a helmet! I wanna see your fabulous hair while we beat the crap out of each other!) and sorta falling in love with him. Dion still my favorite but man Bahamut gets his emotions wrecked and here's just Sleipnir living his best life and death with not a care in the world.

Okay everybody listen up! I haven't found most of the official ship names and I'm too lazy to continue scouring Tumblr, so I need to compile a list myself! Reblog with your preferred ship name for any given ship not listed and/or challenge one another to single combat until we come to a consensus on conflicting names for the same ship!

My contribution:

PhoenixFlare - Joshua x Dion (Phoenix x Bahamut)

FlareKnight - Dion x Terence

PhoenixFlareKnight - Joshua x Dion x Terence

FrostFire - Jill x Clive (Shiva x Ifrit)

FireBolt - Clive x Cid (Ifrit x Ramuh)

StoneStorm - Hugo x Benedicta (Titan/Garuda)

I have no other ships off the top of my head but Barnabas/Odin should probably be Dark-something.

I'll honestly also accept Flame for Clive, but is it too close to Flare? Idk. Opinions?

❗❗Trigger warning for suicide❗❗

Okay, let's talk about it.

Vanille's VA tried her best.

Moving on.

From the very beginning of the game, Vanille's character is foreshadowed very well. When she's held among the other refugees of the Purge, she's smiling and willing to joke around with a gun...even though she has no idea how to use a gun and likely her only experience with them is death. That's how good Vanille is at hiding from despair.

When Hope's mother is killed, she hugs him and tells him to face it later. Notice how she says "Ciao!" here and when she will say it again. She tells Hope to face the death of his mother and the Purge "later", so happily as if she's used to being part of a mass murder scene. She's running away from fhe fear and existential pain; her motto when things get hard has become "face it later."

Trigger Warning For Suicide

*Bonus how she gives Hope a gun to defend himself, but that scene ends on a gentle musical score panning down to show how Hope doesn't take up the gun for fighting in that moment - he's not angry at Snow yet, he doesn't need his anger to survive yet.*

In the Vestiage, Vanille tells Hope that he needs to tell Snow how he feels or he'll regret it forever. This is an allusion to how Vanille has many things she needed to confess, lies that she never told the truth about that are tearing her apart - but more importantly, they're tearing others apart too. When she hears about Serah being held by the fal'Cie, remember that she knows and is friends with Serah already. Serah was the one who told her to look at her problems from a distance and that running away doesn't solve anything.

When Vanille asks "Why is she turning to crystal?" Hope answers the literally reason that "She fulfilled her Focus", but actually this was a really smart use of double-meanings. Vanille wasn't asking why Serah literally turned to crystal - she was asking why Serah is turning to crystal, what Focus did she complete? They've all just kinda been standing there, so what did Serah do?

In Lake Bresha, while Hope is having a meltdown, Sazh is loudly asking questions, Lightning is angrily reeling with her emotions at both losing her sister and being a l'Cie, and Snow is completely in denial, Vanille just interrupts by saying "Oh-oh! Then let's run away! Ciao!" Her first reaction when under duress is to run away. Her cheerful reaction is her completely absolute ability to hide her emotions when bad things occur.

Trigger Warning For Suicide

*Another fun bonus: when Lightning is holding Snow at sword-point when he encourages them to complete their Focus and everyone's interrupted by PSICOM soldiers, Lightning very easily could've just pretended to still be an active Guardian Corps member from Bodhum since her resignation was so unofficial and she's still in uniform. Instead, she actively takes the chance to drop-kick that sucker because she is pissed off and it's hilarious*

When Lightning splits off from the group in the Vile Peaks and she and Hope get cut off from Vanille and Sazh, she just says, "Run? We should run. If we rush in now, we'll just get in [Lightning's] way." When they see the army converging on Palumpolum and likely on Lightning and Hope, Vanille comforts Sazh by saying, "Right, no choice. We run—the other way."

What really begins to test Vanille's resolve is when she learns that she was responsible for essentially cursing not only Serah but now Dajh too. Because of her running from her Focus by pretending she doesn't know what it is, Serah was branded by Anima into a Pulse l'Cie, and Dajh got branded in the Euride Gorge by Kujata into a Cocoon fal'Cie.

What really hurts about this reveal is that Sazh first told her that he just had a son. She's encouraging him to hold it together and defy his l'Cie fate, thinking that "the l'Cie thing" is Sazh himself being a l'Cie, not Dajh.

Trigger Warning For Suicide

Vanille's running is hurting people, and when people are hurt, she runs even further. Then more people are hurt and she keeps running. Similar to Snow, Vanille doesn't know if she can ever even begin to apologize for how many lives she's ruined. Unlike Fang, she also remembers the War of Transgression, where her actions doomed many both Pulsian and Cocoon people (Cocoonians?) - she's holding the guilt of running away from a war, then when she wakes up, she runs from her Focus again because she can't stand more people getting hurt, but people get hurt anyway.

It's one thing for she herself to be a victim, but seeing Sazh mourning his son - younger than Serah, younger than Hope, just a little kid in the wrong place at the wrong time - and she knows it's all her fault is tearing her up inside because she can't run from Sazh. The last time she lied about information, Fang went on a murder spree to try and kill the fal'Cie which caused Dajh to be made a l'Cie in the first place. So naturally, it all blows up with Sazh too.

The worst part about it, in my opinion, is that Dajh was the one who found the Pulse l'Cie in Bodhum. A child was the reason that the entire town of Bodhum was Purged, but Dajh likely didn't know what he was doing, and the only reason he was branded was because Fang and Vanille attacked Kujata at Euride. Fang and Vanille waking didn't cause Bodhum to be Purged; Dajh being branded caused the Purge.

In Nautilus, Sazh is trying to cheer her up. Sazh is protecting her along their journey because he can't leave Vanille to fend for herself. He's confessed what happened to his son to her, he trusts her enough to tell her about how much Dajh loved the chocobos, how he went to the fal'Cie trying to kill it for Dajh's sake...and even that he'd considered killing his fellow l'Cie if it would save Dajh from his fate. That also means that Sazh is willing to kill himself - but his chocobo just lands on his pistol and shakes its head.

Trigger Warning For Suicide

Sazh bought that chocobo chick for Dajh on the day Dajh got branded - purchasing that chick was what made him lose Dajh that day. But that chick also reminds Sazh of the reason that he's still going. Dajh wouldn't want him to kill himself or turn on his friends...so instead he's just running away with Vanille. He has no idea whether Dajh is a crystal or not, whether he'll ever be able to see Dajh again now that he's explicitly a Pulse l'Cie and his son's direct enemy.

Both Vanille and Sazh represent the party running from their fate, while Lightning, Snow, and Hope are charging head-first into delusions and danger in order to avoid confronting the truth. Keep in mind that Nautilus comes after Palumpolum, where the latter three have just confronted their feelings and have made the decision to stop running.

Now, in Nautilus, Sazh is the one telling Vanille to forget about the heavy stuff, to forget about the other l'Cie in Palumpolum, to let their brands just fade away. He takes Vanille to Nautilus Park where Dajh always wanted to go. And let's be honest, a whole park with chocobos and fuzzy sheep is heaven, okay?

Trigger Warning For Suicide

Now Final Fantasy has dealt with terrible situations before, but 13 has always had an air of levity to it and a PG 13 vibe. But when Sazh finally admits that he's going to turn himself in, that's Sazh finally giving up on running from his fate and essentially volunteering to get killed if it means he'll have one last chance to see his son.

He says he's tired of running. All this time, Vanille has been living on the fact that running will help put the bad things behind them or at least give you time to face the situation later. Sazh has run away with her, but he's tired of running - running hasn't helped him, running never can.

Vanille is so desperate to give him a chance to keep living, she tries using revenge. Notice the parallels in this scene with Hope's situation. Hope is using anger and revenge as the only thing to keep himself going, and Vanille is reasoning that revenge will be enough motivation for Sazh to keep going. It all plays out a bit like a soap opera where Vanille gets cut off before she can confess that it was her, but it reinforces that Sazh may be willing to let himself get caught, but keeping Vanille alive is motivating him more than killing her might have.

The scene after the Midlight Reaper is honestly horrifying if it weren't such a cartoony game. Sazh's son should be locked up under PSICOM's security, and you almost think it has to be an illusion when Dajh runs up and finds his father like it's just a game of catch to him. Dajh has been made his father's enemy, and Dajh's ability to sense Pulse is probably what brought him there. This is the boy whose power caused the Purge, who was branded because of Vanille specifically (even if her inaction caused Fang to be reckless). And Dajh is here in Nautilus because Sazh wanted to take him to the amusement park to see the chocobos. The chocobo chick lands in Dajh's hair, Dajh is just happy to see his dad, Sazh is just amazed that he's able to see Dajh - which he thought would be impossible without turning himself in to PSICOM to die.

(Reminder that Nautilus is actually a city and the amusement park aspect is just built into it; people actually live full-time in Nautilus and there's a Nautilus security regiment just like Bodhum has a security regiment in the Guardian Corps)

Then, literally in an instant, while Sazh is close enough to embrace him, Dajh turns to crystal. The difference between Pulse and Cocoon crystals is amazing, but Dajh's crystal is made arguably worse than Serah's transformation because it happens so quickly that he doesn't get last words, and rather than being turned completely to crystal, Dajh is more encased within it - he's still smiling up at his father, oblivious to the whole situation, and he'll be frozen like that potentially forever, his last smile to his father on his face for essentially eternity.

Trigger Warning For Suicide

The bell tolls above them (fun fact: there are 13 hours, as revealed in Lightning Returns), signaling the end of Dajh's time. I was honestly worried that the chocobo chick had got caught in Dajh's hair and turned to crystal too - like that would just be insult to injury.

Crystallization is essentially a family-friendly way of saying we just killed this kid. Even if it is later revealed that Dajh can and will one day wake up just like Serah, in this moment Sazh just lost his entire reason for continuing on as long as he had. His chocobo chick was a reminder of Dajh, that if he just kept surviving, there was still hope that maybe he'd see Dajh again - not knowing if Dajh was a crystal or not was one thing, but seeing Dajh fully turn to crystal essentially in his arms was enough to make Sazh completely fall apart.

Nabaat strolls in and makes a bad situation worse when she reveals footage (impossible angles and that picture is in no way grainy, but whatever) of the Euride incident showing Vanille as one of the Pulse l'Cie that attacked the energy plant. Though notably, in the footage, Vanille is advocating that they ignore their Focus, but PSICOM wouldn't care, so neither might Sazh.

Vanille's reaction is to run.

Trigger Warning For Suicide

She full-on imagines Sazh angry enough to shoot her, reminding her of how many people she's used as shields. She acts kind and innocent and those who care about her like Fang and Sazh put themselves in the line of fire to save her, but Serah and Dajh and all the innocents in Bodhum, all the people of Cocoon who are Purged or will be Purged, all the people of the War of Transgression - Vanille's got an extremely high death count and running can't save her forever.

She's run for so long that her guilt has piled into an enormous weight that absolutely crushes her when she has no one left. Serah was kind to her, but Serah's a crystal now. Hope relied on her for a short period, but he's surviving with Lightning and Snow and honestly on his own now. Fang looked after her to the point that they got separated and Vanille's lies caused her to act recklessly. Now, Sazh, who had relied on her to keep smiling and keep faith that he'll see his son again, has also had his son turned into a l'Cie and then into a crystal because of her. She has no one left who need her and no one left to protect her.

Notably, that's just an illusion of Sazh. She's convinced that he's telling her to die. She stands up and is ready to die when he catches up to her. She wants to die so that Sazh can get revenge and feel better.

But unlike Hope, Sazh is an adult. He recognizes that killing Vanille isn't going to make him feel better. It isn't going to bring Dajh back. In fact, he gets even more angry when Vanille says that he should shoot her for his son's sake. Sazh isn't someone who would shoot and kill someone, let alone in the name of his son. Dajh was kind and light-hearted and comforted his father even when his mother was out of the picture. Killing someone in Dajh's name would be an insult to his son, and Sazh has no time for that bullshit when he has to do everything he can to remember Dajh and honor his essentially-dead son.

Somehow, these two suicidal l'Cie actually managed to give each other therapy because both of them want the other to survive even if they themselves die. My favorite line in this part is "You think you die and that's that? You think you die and everything will be sugar and rainbows?" He's fully aware that just killing Vanille isn't going to make anything better. Her death won't fix everything, it will only let her escape her guilt.

Trigger Warning For Suicide

He's making Vanille choose whether to live or die, because if she wants to die so much, he isn't going to be the one to kill her.

Sazh is holding his brand from the moment he confronts Vanille, conflicted on whether he himself should live or die. What makes Sazh rise up to fight his Eidolon isn't his own life - it's Vanille's. Vanille is willing to stand up to keep Sazh from giving up and dying to an Eidolon who's trying to convince him to live, Sazh is willing to get up to keep Vanille from dying for him.

And Brynhildr is cool and got me into the Volsunga Saga, so like, yeah.

The fact that Sazh tries but isn't able to kill neither Vanille nor himself proves that his Eidolon actually did help him. Sazh was so frustrated at himself for being unable to shoot Vanille, no matter what she had done and how many mistakes she had made. He's frustrated that he still wants to live and he's willing to fight to live. He thought that he was fighting his Eidolon in order to save Vanille, but he was also fighting for his own life, and by defeating his Eidolon, he proved that he wanted to keep living, whether he realized what he was doing or not.

Trigger Warning For Suicide

What's worse is that Nabaat comes in again and says that Dajh's crystal will be put on display as a memorial. Like literally, this little boy turned to crystal is just going to be put up as a "monument to sacrifice", as though Dajh intended to give up his father to PSICOM to be killed in a public execution, as though Dajh found his father in an effort to turn to crystal rather than just wanting to see his father in Nautilus where he'd always wanted to go. As though Dajh Purged an entire town for the sake of Cocoon, as though he captured his father so that he wouldn't live in shame as the son of a Pulse l'Cie rather than actually just loving his dad and being an innocent kid.

It really makes you hate Dysley/Barthandelus later when the anticipated boss battle with Nabaat is cut off abruptly by him. Like, the first time that scene happens, it's a huge reveal! Nabaat is a cunning and sadistic ass who you look forward to beating up, but she's struck down by Barthandelus and he reveals himself to be an actual fal'Cie, where we all thought of him as just a human tool. Turns out, Nabaat is a took, and all her loyalty and cruelty can be cut down by her own superior in an instant.

Her DLC fight in XIII-2 is pretty cool though. Nabaat as a villain is really good. She's top of her class in the army, she's got fabulous hair, she's good at emotional manipulation through a caring façade, and unlike Rosche, she actually did capture her target l'Cie. Though Rosche also had a change of heart at the end and admits to orchestrating mass murder when he falsely trusted the fal'Cie and he would've been a great villain to reform but that's not a story for now.

Sazh hears the full story from Vanille, how his son will eventually be freed from crystal, and just like Lightning and Snow, he resolves to wait and survive however long it takes to see his son again. Just like them, he doesn't know how or when it will be, but he's holding onto something again.

When they escape in the Palamecia, they're not running away anymore. They're both scared of what awaits them, but Sazh points out that they're more scared of dying and giving up now. He's scared of dying so much that he's pushing himself to live now, remembering his son's laughter rather than mourning his loss. It's "time to split. Not run. There's a difference."

Trigger Warning For Suicide

I've reached my image limit for Tumblr! Will I reach the word limit? Is there such a thing?!

Basically, if you complete the first some 14 quests on Gran Pulse before pursuing the storyline, Vanille reveals in the Paddraean Archaeopolis that she's claiming to have been the one to have become Ragnarok, leaving Fang to think that she did nothing - when it's actually the opposite. (Also the characters point out that they should try following Dahaka since it lives near Oerba, so Taejin's Tower isn't the first time they can technically see it).

Vanille's still lying. She tries to tell the truth on the Palamecia, but she gets delayed. Then Barthandelus happens, and she gets delayed, thinking that perhaps telling Fang the truth will make her want to destroy Cocoon to fulfill their Focus.

Hope confides in Vanille that sometimes you do have to lie to keep yourself going. It wasn't unreasonable for any of them to use lies to survive, but what mattered is what happened afterwords. Vanille just kept lying and kept running. Hope used his lies to survive, confront Snow, and then he let go and faced his feelings in the end.

Meanwhile Sazh makes up with Fang when he finds the chocobos. He knows Fang's also responsible for Euride, but he doesn't blame either of them - at least, he's willing to forgive because he knows who they are as people. He's taking responsibility for letting Dajh out of his sight, but he's not facing his guilt alone. He's learned that facing everything alone is their downfall. Foreshadowing for Fang in the ending, taking on everything alone.

When Vanille faces her Eidolon, her last lie has been revealed. She's not alone anymore, she has a new family, and there will be no more running away.


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