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Hugging but jerrick, and in the rain. But only if you want to

It’s probably not the content you wanted lol, but I just can’t see them hugging in the rain in a way that wasn’t angsty or smth.

More thoughts behind the cut.

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Malachite Character Analysis

(Warning: Mention and analysis of a very toxic relationship.)

¨These two are really bad for each other. Malachite was formed through extortion and deception and held together out of revenge. Malachite is the worst relationship imaginable.¨

Malachite was a character that was introduced in Season 1 finale “Jailbreak” after Jasper and Lapis Lazuli decided to fuse together to defeat the Crystal gems.

In this post i’m going to examine Malachite as a fusion and what she tells us about Jasper and Lapis and their relationship.

Lapis Lazuli´s and Jasper´s backstory:

First let’s talk a bit about Jasper’s and Lapis´ past:

Steven first found Lapis trapped in a Gem mirror, after spending some time with her, he decided to free her and later healed her gem so she could return to Homeworld by using her magic water wings.

In the episode ¨Same Old World¨ (Season 3) Lapis tells to Steven her backstory about how she got trapped in that mirror.

¨It was thousands of years ago. I was only meant to visit for a short time, but I got caught in the middle of the war. It was awful. I tried to run, but… I was picked up by a Homeworld soldier and confused for a Crystal Gem, and used as a tool.¨

Lapis talks about what happened to her as it was an accident, a terrible tragedy in which there´s not only one person she can blame for all her problems. In a way, she´s potrayed as victim of the Gem war, she was on Earth for a visit and then she was meant to leave.

She was treated as a prisoner from gems who were supposed to be on her side, used as a tool and left behind on Earth like her life was nothing.

¨It soon became clear that there was no hope in stopping the rebellion. All of the Homeworld Gems fled, and all the panic of escaping Earth, I was left behind. And there I stayed. Freedom in my sight, but out of reach for ages, until I was found.¨

Then she spend thousands of year trapped in that mirror, alone, with no one to talk to, with her gem cracked on top of that. Anyone stuck in that situation who quickly became insane and would definely not be the same person that used to be before the traumatic event.

It´s not suprising Lapis was so angry when Steven free her from that mirror. While she didn´t want to get revenge on the Crystal gems she still had a lot of anger and frustration buried deep inside her.

As for Jasper, her backstory differs greatly from Lapis´:

Jasper was born in the middle of the gem war in the Beta Kindergarten, in less than a few hours she took more than 80+ Crystal gems impressing many Homeworld gems due to her strengh.

She was considered a gem role model in Homeworld, she was an example of what a quartz soldier should be. The issue was that depiste being highly respected by her peers, she couldn´t get out of her mind that she still was a gem that came from the worst kindergarten on Earth.

According to Peridot on ¨Beta¨ most gems born in the Beta Kirdengarten came out flawed or defective in some way. This was because Homeworld rushed the place during the war to get more gems. 

Jasper was one of the few gems that came out ¨right¨ to the point she could be considered a superquartz soldier by Homeworld´s standards.

However not matter how much praised she got, Jasper thought there was something with her because of her origins. This made her develop an  obsession with proving her power and getting more and more self-destructive as time passed.

¨Jasper is a bully in the truest sense. Deep down, she’s afraid there’s something wrong with her, so she has to feed her ego. She has to put other Gems down to stay on top. Who she is and where she’s from gnaws at her all the time. She has a fantastic reputation, she’s considered the greatest Quartz soldier produced on Earth, and that might impress other Gems, but it will never be good enough for her.¨

¨Because she loves honor, fighting, making her mark, and winning the battle, she’ll actually go against her programming a little bit just to be the winner. So she can be self-destructive at times. She is tragically obsessed with proving her superiority.¨

Why is all this important? Well, it´s essential to know where these characters are coming from to understand why they decided to be Malachite in first place and why they were a recipe for disaster the moment that Jasper asked Lapis to fuse with her.

On one hand you have a gem that was spent thousands of years trapped against her will and carries a lot on anger and trauma inside her. On the other hand the other gem also has war trauma, it’s very self-destructive and thinks she’s horrible. Mix these two together and what you get is a unstable fusion made of hate and revenge.

Malachite as a metaphor for Jasper´s and Lapis´ relationship

Now that i have talked about their past. I going examine the scene in which they fuse into Malachite in “Jailbreak” and what the fusion tells us about their relationship.

After being defeated by Garnet (a fusion) Jasper decides to find someone she could also fuse with to win against the Crystal gems.

She spot Lapis Lazuli and grabs her before she can escape flying. She convinces Lapis to fuse with her to get revenge on Crystal gems. She reminds her how they used her and how they are traitors to Homeworld.

¨These Gems, they’re traitors to their Homeworld. They kept you prisoner. They used you.¨

It’s worth of pointing out that Jasper never tries to “force” Lapis into fusing with her in this scene. She tries using her, true, but she waits until Lapis accepts and gives her hand.

Now, Jasper could care less about Lapis in this scene. For her, she was only just a tool to get revenge on the Crystal gems and Rose Quartz. There wasn’t any “trust” between the two.

As for Lapis, she tried escaping from Jasper first but after realising that she was about to being used again by someone who had kept her prisoner in the ship she snapped and decided to stop being treated like an object for once.

Moments later after they fused into Malachite, Lapis took control of the fusion’s water powers and chained her down, dragging her into the bottow of the ocean.

¨I’m done being everyone’s prisoner. Now you’re my prisoner! And I’m never letting you go! Let’s stay on this miserable planet… together!¨

As Lapis stated, she was done of being everyone’s prisioner, she was tired of being treated like a tool by everyone. Control in her own life was something was constanly taken away from her. So by trapping Malachite (and herself) meant that was able to make choices again.

As for Jasper, i already mentioned that she only wanted Lapis to become more powerful. Jasper is a gem that shown to be obssesed with winning and fighting. She doesn’t accept defeat easily and the more she loses, more self-destructive she gets.

In “Chilled tid” Steven gets a glimpse of what Malachite’s mind looked like: Lapis and Jasper were fighting over the control of the fusion. They both were completely exhausted and beaten.

There’s a visual methaphor about how they are both chained to Malachite in this dream sequence. This is very much like how it’s really difficult to get out of a toxic/codependent relationship and how one feels trapped with no hope of getting out of it.

Another interesting detail is when Jasper takes control, all she’s able to say is “YOU! YOU! YOU!¨ to Steven. It shows how crazy she gets when can’t win a battle and how her mind deteriorates in the process.

The episode "Alone at the Sea” explores their relationship even further by showing which their main motivations were and how it affect them both.

First of all, the reason of why Lapis didn’t want to be near the ocean again it’s because it remind her of time she used to be fused with Jasper:

“Look, Lapis, I know you spent a really long time fused with Jasper at the bottom of the ocean, but you’re not Malachite anymore.And water is a part of who you are. You can’t let one bad experience take that away from you.”

During the boat trip Lapis keeps blaming herself for the events of Ocean gem and Malachite:

“It’s my fault. I’m the one to blame.”

“I'm terrible! I did horrible things! I-I broke your dad’s leg. I stole Earth's ocean! Go on! Tell me I’m wrong!”

She describes herself as “terrible”. She thinks she don’t deserve the kindness that Steven has giving her during all this time.

Lapis is a character who usually stuggles with change in the series. She thinks she won’t be able to revover from her trauma, that she can’t grow and become a better person.

She also mentions to him how she can’t help but think of when she used to be Malachite.

“I’m really trying to enjoy it out here, but… I can’t stop thinking about being fused as Malachite, how I used all my strength to hold her down in the ocean, and how I was always battling against Jasper to keep her bound to me.”

“But it’s not like that anymore. You don’t have to be with Jasper.”

“That’s not it. I… I miss her.”

“What?!”

“We were fused for so long.”

This implies that after spending so much together Jasper and Lapis became codependent of each other. Steven, who was still a teenager in this scene, couldn’t fully get grasp of why his friend who missed being in a terrible situation like that.

And Lapis was not the only one that felt like this.

When Jasper shows up, she shows she has been missing Lapis as well and she has been tracking her to find her.

In a very rare moment that would look out of character for her Jasper kneels down and begs for Lapis to be Malachite again.

¨Let’s be Malachite again.¨  

Keep in mind that until know Jasper has always been potrayed as someone who would do anything it takes to win. She’s tough gem soldier who isn’t afraid of her enemies. She’s strong,cocky and agressive. So why did she ask to be Malachite again?

“I was wrong about fusion. You made me understand! Malachite was bigger and stronger than both of us! We could fly!”

She emphazises Malachite’s power when they were fused. How strong and powerful she was.

This makes sense considering the factthat Jasper thinks of herself as “horrible” and “defective”. She has a huge inferiority complex that comes from how Earth gems are perceived on Homeworld.

So, being Malachite made her feel “complete” and cover up her insecurities and personal issues.

“It’ll be better this time. I’ve changed. You’ve changed me. I’m the only one who can handle your kind of power.”

She tries to convince Lapis by saying how she’s the only one that can “handle” her powers. This shows again how self-destructive Jasper can be as she was willing to go through that pain again just to feel powerful.

Another reason, i think, it’s because she partially blames herself for Pink Diamond’d shattering. She probably wanted to be punished for her “failure” or wanted someone who she could follow again much like she started calling Steven “My diamond” in “Homeworld Bound”.

As for Lapis, there are a few reasons she had her doubts of being Malachite again:

1) The fusion was a way for her to gain control back on her own life. She was tired of being tricked and used by everyone that she wanted to take her anger on someone.

“I was terrible to you. I liked taking everything out on you. I needed to, I-I hated you. It was bad!”

Lapis wanted someone to go through the same pain she had to endure for thousands of years. And that someone could have anyone. She choosed Jasper as she was the closest one to her in “Jailbreak”.

When she was separated, she felt she suddenly lost that great amount of power that the fusion gave to her. She lost that “control” she had.

2) During “Alone at the sea” she describes herself many times as terrible and how she doesn’t deserve the boat trip. She keeps blaming herself from her actions and how she can’t get better.

Jasper even calls Lapis a monster in a moment, stating they very much alike:

“You can’t lie to me. I’ve seen what you’re capable of. I thought I was a brute, but you… you’re a monster.”

Lapis wanted to go back to be Malachite since she thought it was what someone as terrible as her deserved. She thought she couldn’t grow into good person. Gems terrible as her and Jasper were meant to be together.

But Lapis knew better than getting trapped in that fusion again.

“NO! ”“What we had wasn’t healthy. I never want to feel like I felt with you. Never again! So just, go!”

In the end she refused to fuse with Jasper and realised how toxic their relationship was. It was a terrible experience and something she didn’t want to take part in ever again.

Malachite as a character

Being fusion who is supposed to represent an very toxic relationship, Malachite is potrayed as very agressive, unstable and sadistic. She´s quite unpredictable since her actitude depends of who it´s taking control of her.

When her eyes are ¨cat shaped¨ it usually means that Jasper is the one controlling her. If her eyes are wide and open, it indicates Lapis is the one in control.

It´s difficult to affirm Malachite ever had her own personality at all,as her components were always fighting over her power and she was a mere tool from the moment she was ¨born¨.

¨A fusion like theirs is unstable, bound together by anger and mistrust. If that bond snaps, their anger will take over, and destroy.¨  

She ends up being a pretty tragic character as her whole existence was filled by hatred and suffering to the point she didn´t know anything else. Unlike other characters from Steven universe she wasn´t given the chance to redeem herself.

It´s interesting how Malachite in ¨Super Watermelon Island¨ kept exchaching between ¨we¨ and ¨I¨ to talk about herself. This indicates again that she wasn´t fully her own person.

If Lapis and Jasper were to fuse again after having worked through their issues, Malachite would be a more stable and less agressive fusion. But that´s very unlikely to happen since it was a terrifying experience for both of them.

In conclusion: Malachite is character with tons of metaphors that talks a lot about Lapis and Jasper and who they are as people. She serves to show how toxic some relationships can get when there is a lack of basic trust and understanding and is created by mutual hatred. It´s an example of how complicated relationships can be and how a person it´s really more complex they appear to be.

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The Ricks of s3e6

I took Rick notes. Morty notes can be found here.

Toxic Rick 

1st thing after gaining consciousness, he cries out for Morty and hurries to his rescue

Assumes the worst of the spa hand, blaming him for retaliation

Sense of ownership over Morty

Nothing is worth his time due to his overwhelming genius

He really does seem overwhelmed by it.. Imprisoned by it?

Rages as he does science, intense and urgent need for immediate and absolute control

Morty is weak and so inferior that he is undeserving of attachment

Equates genius to godhood, genius is everything

Immortality and God-complex, “If God exists, it’s fucking ME!” Might actually be undercut by a cry for help—this is his fate.

Conflicted by his godhood, and the pointlessness of it—he has nothing to prove to anyone, everyone is beneath him.

And that seems to trigger his realization of his Toxicity..

Seeks validation from Morty regardless, “Think anyone but me could do that?!”

Vengeful

Believes he’s the part of “Pussy Rick” that “keeps it real”—Real being pessimism, cruelty, suffering

Constantly indignant.

Calls Healthy Morty a “sociopath”, implying Rick is aware of Morty’s darker potential.. And maybe wishes he weren’t, since it’s with Toxic.

“Remember us?!” Us. Not “me”.

Denial of reliance on Morty, a reliance which sounds almost like a (psychotic?) dependency.

Affirms to Healthy Rick he must assume dominance over Healthy Morty. He sounded especially earnest, and anything but dismissive over its importance.

“Don’t negotiate”, anger and indignance but subtext might be worry and necessity for the ‘proper’ dynamic

Eyes adjusting, or so caught up in rage he misses what’s obviously going to be in front of him?

Demands Morty’s excitement, and includes him, “We did it”

“Fuck you Summer!”

Described by Healthy Rick as “literally unable to see the bigger picture”, implying he is myopic and self-obsessed

Incapable of humor. Too much suffering and self-obsession.

“Bottled up inside a sentimental jackass” Rick hates his own sentimentality to no one’s surprise

Coo’s to grow a monster into a loyal fighting dog with gibberish love, both manipulative, controlling, and possibly earnest

Straight into a violent brawl, immediately fighting dirty. No honor!

“I lie about everything!”

Fear of confinement, of being stifled or silenced. He values his freedom and autonomy above anything, and no one else’s.

Simply vacates once Beth shows up, not a word to her or about her

Can’t achieve vengeance, so he damns the world to his own hell

“You’re not impressing anyone!” Because impressing people is what HE wants to do, and he IS impressed by Healthy Rick’s callous cruelty

Requires constant validation, despite that impossibility when all of existence is beneath him

Rage as a plaintive call into the Absurd

“Grandpa’s here.”

Summary: Despite everything, he is paradoxically insecure and suffering his intense narcissism. He is wracked with oppressive psychological pain and tortures himself with his loneliness. Godhood is inescapable, a burden he cannot make peace with. He never seems pleased by his power, only harnessing it because there is no other way of being. His fate is eternal isolation, no matter how much he screams or how hard he thrashes.. or how much his familial bonds matter to him.

“Healthy” Rick

1st thing he does is apologize to the spa hand, insisting on his wrongdoing even as the apology is accepted. It isn’t just politeness, he seems to feel real guilt.

Smiles at the infinite possibilities of the universe, and relinquishes his sense of control or understanding of it (Relinquishing self to Camus’ Absurd?)

His genius naturally wants to expand on Morty’s “interesting” music idea, before realizing he’d gotten caught up in trying to calculate happiness. Some things are out of his reach and not his place, and that’s okay.

Pride in Morty, and his familial connection to him

Blows off his genius and potential in favor of simplicity

Respectful of others’ autonomy and needs, “A moment of your time?”

Apologizes several times throughout

Personal responsibility

Feels concern, and openly comes to Healthy Morty about it

Shares the entirety of the problem, as well as his feelings on it

Nervous, uncertain when Morty blows off the phone call, and hesitates before continuing

Wants to work with Morty at an even level, seeing him as an equal?

Wouldn’t have detoxed, but knows he still would have if he had known pre-detox. Familiar with himself and his demons.

Not seeing the disturbing voicemails as the problem to stop, but rather the pain of the Toxics.

“We yanked them from their home.”

Trusting to a fault, even trusting his own inner demons not to lie

Seems okay with the concepts of finality and things being finite

Seems to smile as he works, implying a sense of ownership over his capability

Even smiles at his toxins. Does this Rick actually love himself? Empathy for others’ suffering? Seems pleased with himself for finding and facilitating an amicable solution.

Indecisive, insecure with his own judgement without Morty’s assurance. At first. Sense of adult responsibility bringing him to make the choice anyway?

Can’t disregard the “will to live” in the Toxics. Respect for and values life in all expressions

Has his sense of humor, though it is still capable of being destructive

“I’m accountable to my own toxins, right?” Strong sense of responsibility for his whole self and his behavior. Uncertainty, and a desire for moral integrity. Seeking validation and reassurance, expressing weakness in the form of uncertainty and insecurity.

Also responsible for their resolution, their happiness, homing them. Owning them as part of himself.

Startled by Morty’s outburst of breaking the phone– by the suddenness, finality, and violence of it.

Realizes Healthy Morty won’t be of help, confused and disappointed by it. Something else he failed to expect.

Doesn’t anticipate the actions or motivations of others, making only the best assumptions. Belief in inherent good?

Ready to fight only after being struck, and even then, he takes slow initiative

“We can resolve our issues without resorting to—“ This Rick believes in resolution and recovery! Maybe therapy too..

Tolerant to the point of absolute pacifism, even in the face of a world-scale threat that he should still be responsible for.

Honorable in his treatment of others, even attempting to fight his Toxic as a last resort and in a fair boxing fashion

Didn’t seem to predict that the Toxic would fight dirty, even as its obvious. Does his intelligence take such a backseat to his honor?

Capable and fully willing to self-sacrifice for what’s right(re-toxifying)

“Sorry Summer!” “Summer get out of here!”

“Leave her out of this!” Protecting Beth from his own personal struggle, and the danger it wroughts

“I’m so sorry, girls.” Accepts and embraces his role as caring patriarch

Appreciative of Healthy Morty’s drive to stop the Toxics, but explains in a fatherly way that it “isn’t their place” and the Toxics have “a right to their worldview”

States that Toxic Rick’s motivations “are a mystery”. Might be a vague answer to avoid explaining more than he sees is necessary. If so, doesn’t want his Toxic to trouble his family.

Describes Toxic Rick as his “entitlement, narcissism, crippling loneliness” and his “irrational attachments”

Too healthy to lie, and too uncaring to have a personal stake in Toxic Morty

Possesses Rick’s capacity for ruthlessness

“You’ve never done anything but complain about me being in charge” Healthy Rick holds dominance in Rick’s psyche

Sees merging with the Toxics as healthy. Becoming a complete and healthy person requires embracing one’s demons

Empathy for others, including himself

Forces his Toxic’s surrender by exploiting his love for his grandson. Ouch.

Summary: Doesn’t let his own shortcomings be a problem for himself or anyone else, apologizing when they do. He is never controlled by fear, unlike the Toxic, and finds peace in being passive when it comes to the grandiosity of the universe. Feels openly, unguarded. Believes in personal growth, being honorable, and talking things out. A strong sense of personal responsibility, especially in regards to his place as patriarch of the family. Either possesses a sense of empathy for the plights of others (and himself), or feels such responsibility that he will do what is “right” regardless.. and by any means necessary, as long as it doesn’t conflict with his own ethics. At times, he is contradictory, perhaps telling of his indifference.

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A lot of “you’s” and a lot of “he’s” in here. A lot of shifting the blame onto his child with the language he uses, both in the most recent flashbacks and in previous ones.

Obviously, there’s a reason Endeavor does this, whether consciously or not – he’s distancing the blame from himself by placing that burden on Touya. 

If only Touya didn’t have a defective quirk, Touya could’ve “smashed the ugliness in [his] heart” and made his father’s dream come true. If only Touya wasn’t born with his mother’s constitution, Endeavor wouldn’t have had to create more kids to find a new successor. If only Touya understood that he had to stop using his quirk, even though he was created solely to become a hero, but since that can’t happen now he has to look elsewhere for meaning in his existence?

As reprehensible as it is, it makes sense that Endeavor does this to justify his own actions. My main issue is that with the framing and prioritizing of his viewpoint, it runs the risk of readers inferring that Touya is to blame.

To be fair, everything in the chapter aside from Endeavor’s words show that he’s wrong and at fault, so it only takes a minimum level of critical thinking skills to see this. A doctors advises him to stop recklessly engineering his children, since it’s taboo and potentially dangerous to the child, but he has Natsuo and Shouto in spite of this. Rei expresses her reservations, since Touya has already caught on to what he’s doing and it doesn’t seem like she’s enthused to have more children, either. He disregards her concern and pressures her into it, anyway.

And it doesn’t matter what he said to Touya or how caring it sounded when all of his actions directly contradict this. If he cared for Touya, why not spend his free time with him, even if they can’t train anymore? Because he spent time with Touya not to bond with him as a son, but to train him as his legacy. If he was concerned for Touya’s safety, why did he have 2 more children, knowing they could be born with the same detrimental quirks? Because it was never to protect Touya, it was to replace the child who was supposed to be his successor.

Everything Endeavor did as a father taught Touya that he was not good enough and thus he was not worthy of his father’s attention. His language places the burden of that on his son and that’s how he internalized it a as a child. Telling Touya to stop without providing the unconditional love he’s vying for is useless and shows a blatant lack of awareness for his child’s needs. Endeavor created an environment where he pays attention to his kids based on their ability to be a hero that could surpass All Might – no amount of talk was going to convince Touya to cease his self-harming behavior unless Endeavor changed his behavior as a parent first.

Now compare the more recent flashbacks to the last one listed above, which is from Shouto’s perspective. There’s no denying the way Endeavor treats his children as objects for his own gain is wrong when he makes this remark about Touya while he’s literally beating down his five-year-old. And he does this for the same reason he abandoned his firstborn. The point of this scene is to show that Endeavor holds his ambition above all else — even his family.

And there’s no issue per se with giving nuance to his character. He should have regrets and he should be remorseful for what he’s done, but that doesn’t automatically mean he’s deserving of forgiveness or sympathy. 

The problem is when this “nuance” is prioritized above the not-so-subtle and far more important suffering that his victims endured, and are still enduring, particularly in the case of Dabi. And it shouldn’t be obscuring the unequivocal truth here, which is this: Touya’s self-harming tendencies and inability to regulate his emotions as a child doesn’t negate the fact that he was neglected to the point of self-harm and his father is as culpable in that as he would be if he had burned his son with his own flames.