What Am I Missing?

what am I missing?

act ten: “Just promise me I’ll still get time with you.”

feat: bang chan x f.reader, seo changbin x f.reader, han jisung x f.reader

↳ in your mid to late twenties you’re left wondering if you missed your sexual awakening. With a the help of friends you start to really find yourself.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: for the story as a whole angst, a little fluff, body image issues, and self doubt, cussing all smut warnings listed below for what is in this story.

series masterlist

𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬.

𝐚𝐧: what is everyone thinking about each of the boys so far?

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: just angst for this chapter but for other chapters: nipple play, clit and vaginal fingering, lots of dry humping and some dirty talk. for the story as a whole, oral (fem & male receiving), piv, unprotected sex, groping, threesome, use or traffic light system, choking, and spanking, the mc calls herself a slut more warning to come. Soft but dominant jisung, kinda sub reader for jisung. Being tied up during sex.

Anyway you look at it, things between you and the boys are different. They still treat you the same when you’re all together. But there is something about the fact that they have all seen you naked and been with you in the most intimate way that makes you feel different.

You’re working a shift with Chan for the first time in a very long time. He’s been so busy with his studio job he barely ever picks up shifts waiting tables. You’re over this shift and you can’t wait to be off. Sitting on the curb in back behind your restaurant. You’re taking your time trying to have a moment away from your crowded restaurant. The door opens and moments later Chan sits down next to you.

“Why haven’t we quit tonight?” He groans, leaning against you.

“I don’t know but I’m over this shift. All the customers are assholes and on top of that Mingyu and Yuqi working are together in section two,” even though it’s been a while seeing them together makes you feel awkward.

“Forget about Mingyu.”

“It’s a little hard when I know he’s seen me naked.”

“I mean I’ve seen you naked too,” he smiles.

“Except you didn’t basically dump me right after for another girl,” you can still picture Mingyu's face as he tells you about Yuqi. The feeling of him rejecting you still burns.

“Well if you want maybe we can have a date night like did with Jisung and maybe you know-“

“Is this your way of asking me to have sex with you?” You can’t help but tease him. You know Chan would never use you just to hook up.

“I would like to have a little date night. We don’t even have to sex,” you look over at him and notice he’s already blushing.

“I would really like that,” you can’t help but smile.

“Good, I liked being able to spend time with you.” He reaches down, lacing his fingers with yours.

“Just so you know I haven’t told either of the boys details about what happened between us.” You say. He pauses as he pulls away from you.

“I want what happens between us to be private.” There is a gentle look in his eyes. You hope he always looks at you this way.

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t want to share this with the boys.” He says.

He reaches down, lacing his fingers with yours. You rest your head on his shoulder. “Did you want to go to that diner on fourth street we used to go to when we would study tonight after we’re off?” This little diner has always been a place you loved spending time at.

“Just the two of us?” He asked.

“Yes, just the two of us.”

“I need to go back in and finish the last two hours of this hell shift,” you sigh, pulling away from him.

He stands up and grabs your hand before you can walk away. He rests his hand gently on your cheek. You can’t tell if he’s going to kiss you but you desperately want him too.

“Chan?”

“Yes?”

“Are you teasing me or are you going to kiss me?”

“Am I allowed to kiss you?” The way he smiles at you is enough to give you butterflies.

“Absolutely.”

This isn’t some heated searing kiss. The feeling of his lips on yours makes you feel like you’re home. Reaching up, you rest your hand on his chest. You could stay in this moment forever.

“Good luck in there,” he says softly as he pulls away.

The rest of your shift luckily went by quickly. You barely had to see Mingyu or Yuqi which helped a lot. You walked outside to find Chan leaning against his car waiting for you. “I almost quit as I was walking out,” Chan says.

“I think I almost quit every shift.”

“Let’s go get food,” he says.

Luckily you walked the short distance to your work today so you don’t have to worry about leaving your car at work. Chan drives you both to the diner that’s only ten minutes away. Walking into the quiet diner you sit in a booth in the back where you often used to sit. It’s after midnight and there aren’t many people here. Sitting in this familiar diner you miss the long nights you would spend in here studying with Chan.

You look up from your menu to find him watching you. You already know what you want to eat so you aren’t sure why you even looked at the menu. You’ve always gotten the same thing to eat here.

“Strawberry waffle?” He smiles.

“Of course.”

Nights like this remind you how Chan has always brought you a sense of comfort. He knows everything he could possibly know about you and he always goes out of his way to make you happy.

The waitress comes over and takes your order and before she can leave Chan orders you both a hot coco just like you used to drink while studying.

She comes back, handing you each a warm glass of hot cocoa with whip cream on it. You sit there sipping on the hot beverage as you start to relax after your long night at work. You can tell Chan is silently studying each of your movements.

“Does this count as a date?” You can’t help but wonder, breaking the comfortable silence.

“Do you want this to be a date?” He raises his eyebrow as he studies you.

“Chan, don’t answer my question with a question.”

“I would like to think this is a date,” he reaches across the table, taking your hand in his. He slowly drags his thumb across your knuckles. “I like spending time with you.”

“I like spending time with you too,” you watch him as he gently traces your skin.

“I remember the first time I met you. There was just something about being around you that made me happy. You felt like sunshine on a rainy day.” You suddenly feel speechless. He's never said anything like this before. You know you’ve always been special to him, but he’s never said anything like this before.

“Chan, I need you in my life.”

“Don’t worry baby I’m not going anywhere,” he lifts your hand and presses a gentle kiss to the top of your delicate skin.

“I’m sorry if I’m hurting you by spending time with the boys,” you can’t bring yourself to say their names right now or mention that you’re having sex with them.

“I’m okay. I’ll always be okay,” he presses another kiss to the top of your hand. You wanted to believe he was telling the truth but something deep down inside of you knew Chan wasn’t telling the truth.

“Just promise me I’ll still get time with you. I might not be wild in bed like Jisung, but I promise I can make you feel good.”

“Chan, I don't need you to be wild. I would do it again with you in a heartbeat. You made me feel so confident and so wanted.”

“It’s not hard to make you feel wanted, when I want you.” He gives you that gentle smile as his cheeks lightly blush. For a moment you forget you’re in a diner past midnight. The only thing your brain can focus on is your best friend who is sitting across from you.

“I want you too,” you say. You wished this table wasn’t separating you, because you desperately want to kiss him.

Before he can respond the waitress comes over and sets your food down on the table. You don’t eat for a long moment, you just watch Chan wondering what is going through his mind.

“You should eat while it’s hot,” he says.

“Chan?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I go over to your house tonight?” You don’t want him to drop you off after this. You want to spend the night curled up next to him.

“Absolutely.”

Regarding my taglist: I’m tagging so many people like 300+ people and the the amount of reblogs and interactions I’m getting compared to my taglist make me quite sad. I kindly ask if you request to be tagged that you interact with my writing. It takes me a really long time to make sure I tag everyone. Im going to start removing silent readers and blank blogs to make tagging easier. If anyone wants to be added to this stories taglist I have decided to close it for now. I can’t add anymore people unfortunately. Im really asking for interaction if I’m spending the time to tag you.

Thank you to anyone who has been replaying to the post and reblogging them.

instead of you [part thirty-three] || l.mh

pairing: [best friend’s brother] lee minho x college!reader ft. han jisung

summary: you didn’t expect to spend your summer pretending to be your best friend’s girlfriend- then again, you didn’t expect to fall for your best friend’s brother, either. 

warnings: swearing, angst, discussions of plane disasters, mentions of sex (mdni ; 18+)

word count: 3k

a/n: revamped my tom holland series from my main blog ( @wazzupmrstark ) to try and motivate myself to finish it!!

additional a/n: disclaimer that this chapter and the following chapters take place on oahu and kauai, hawai'i. i wrote this a year ago (originally posted on sept. 22, 2022) and included mentions of the negative impact and sentiment tourism in hawai'i procures, but it was before the fires in maui. i included hawai'i in their vacation in the first place because i'm part hawaiian and wanted to bring attention to our people's attitude toward tourists while also writing about the parts of the islands that i grew up loving. and i thought i should clarify that before posting, as i feel the context is important to precede what would be an otherwise distasteful choice if i had written this now. please keep hawai'i in your thoughts, mahalo plenty <3

series masterlist | early access to the next chapter on ko-fi

Predictably, you cried yourself to sleep. You debated over whether or not to tell Minho. He’d probably find out when he woke up in the morning but would he be mad if he didn’t hear it from you? If Jisung was right, he didn’t care about you at all, so why would you grant him the courtesy of a head’s up? You didn’t want to believe Jisung, rather, you wanted to believe that he had only said those things in the heat of the moment but at the end of the day, he knew Minho far better than you did. Whether or not he was telling the truth to try and save you or lying to hurt you was up to you to decipher.

You wound up texting Minho, ‘Jisung knows,’ without any other context and calling it a night. 

The next morning, you woke up to a message from Jisung telling you not to bother getting ready for the day and that he’d be going on without you. It was mostly a relief not to have to put on an act after everything that happened the night before but it also stung.

You weren’t very optimistic about repairing your relationship with Jisung, but any lingering hope vanished when he wouldn’t even look at you in passing in the hallway. 

You spent the entire day in bed, trying to distract yourself with anything you could think of to pass the time. You scrolled through social media until your timelines stopped refreshing with new content. There wasn’t anything interesting enough on TV to pull you out of spiraling so you didn’t even bother trying to find something to hold your attention. 

At one point you remembered the book you were reading but as soon as you opened it you were greeted by all of Jisung’s little annotations he had left for you. He still had your book and you wondered if he would ever finish it now that you’d ruined everything. 

You thought about texting him, just to check in or try and talk about things but you didn’t want to bother him. A couple of times, you almost texted him just out of instinct. You would go to send him a tweet that you thought he’d find funny and then remember.

Minho came by your room that night after dinner when everyone was back from the day’s activities. He knocked twice, letting himself in before you’d even finished telling him he could enter. 

“Care to explain what happened?” he asked, hands on his hips.

You shrugged noncommittally. “Jisung found out.”

“How? Did you tell him?”

“And ruin my own relationship with my best friend? Yeah, definitely.”

Minho rolled his eyes. “I didn’t come here to argue. I just want to know what happened.”

“Then don’t accuse me of shit.”

“I didn’t mean- I’m sorry. That’s not what I was trying to do.”

You sighed and signaled for him to sit down if he wanted to. He did, perching himself on the edge of the bed cautiously. 

“He knows because he noticed me sneaking out and finally decided to follow me.”

The color drained from Minho’s face. “So he heard-”

You nodded. “I don’t know how much, but enough.”

“Fuck.”

“Fuck is right.”

“He wouldn’t say a word to me today,” Minho said. 

“He wouldn’t even look at me.”

“I guess we knew this would happen eventually.”

“Yeah.”

“We fucked up.”

“Yeah.”

“You were right.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, furrowing your eyebrows.

“We really do deserve each other.”

Oh. What Jisung had said earlier rang through your ears again. 

“I guess I was.”

Just then, the door to the bedroom opened and Jisung walked in, scoffing as he passed his brother. 

“I should have known,” he muttered to himself. 

“Ji, look-” Minho tried, only to be immediately cut off by his younger brother. 

“Don’t. Please just fucking don’t.”

“But-”

“God, you never listen to a word I say, do you? Either of you?”

You wanted to protest that you did listen to him but you thought better of it. It wouldn’t help your case at all. Instead, you sat there silently like a child being scolded. 

“I don’t want to hear you explain yourself,” Jisung continued. “I don’t care why you fucked my best friend. I think the act in itself doesn’t need an explanation.” Minho opened his mouth to respond but Jisung cut him off again. “I don’t want to hear an apology either. I already know you don’t mean it. In fact, I think we’re done here so if you wouldn’t mind getting the fuck out of my room...”

Minho looked like he wanted to argue but likely knew it wouldn’t do any good so he simply hung his head and let himself out, bidding you a quiet goodnight as he left. You didn’t respond. You didn’t even acknowledge him. How could you?

“Don’t forget to pack your things for the flight tomorrow. It’s a long one.”

You sat there, stunned. You hadn’t expected Jisung to speak to you at all, let alone say something amicable. 

“O-ok thanks,” you responded shakily.

“I’m sleeping in here tonight,” he added. 

“Oh-” you scrambled up, preparing to leave but Jisung stopped you. 

“No, I meant with you. It’d look weird if I slept on the couch again.”

Of course. Keeping up appearances.

“Is it even worth it to do this anymore?” you asked. “I mean, it’s falling apart at the seams.”

“It’ll be fine,” Jisung argued. “It’s just a few more weeks.”

“Do you really want to keep pretending to be in love with someone you hate?”

He froze, still bent over his suitcase. Then he straightened up and turned to face you. 

“I don’t hate you.”

“You don’t?”

“No, I don’t think I could ever hate you. I’ve been trying, trust me.”

You weren’t sure how to take that. You weren’t sure how you were supposed to take it. You tried not to let his words stoke the embers of hope you were still clinging on to but it was already proving difficult. 

“Maybe with time,” you suggested. 

He shrugged. “Ready for bed?”

-

You managed to get some sleep, despite everything. It took a while for your heart to calm down as you lay there beside your (ex?) best friend who was already snoring softly. He had fallen asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. You weren’t sure how he was able to drift off so easily in spite of your whole friendship falling apart but perhaps the stress was only one-sided. 

You were the one being eaten alive by anxiety and guilt. All he had to do was mourn the loss of everything you destroyed. 

The hours of sleep you did get passed quickly without dreams which was unusual for you. Before you knew it, Jisung’s alarm was going off and both of you were groaning as you dragged yourself out of bed. 

You finished packing the rest of your things in relative silence. Neither of you had much to say aside from when you passed each other’s things back and forth from your suitcases. 

The sun had yet to come up when the rest of the Hans gathered in the kitchen with their luggage. Since the flight was over twelve hours long Jisung’s parents had booked the earliest possible departure which just so happened to be before the sunrise. 

The boys slept during the ride to the airport but you weren’t able to. You were squished between Jisung and Minho in the very back of the van, feeling like a pin in a grenade. They ignored each other, of course, both seemingly dead to the world. 

Minho woke up before Jisung. He glanced over at you and offered an expression of sympathy. You just shrugged in response. 

Sitting in the car like that caused your knees to brush up against each other every so often, each time you rounded a corner or went over a speed bump. Every time it happened you fought the urge to meet his eyes. The touch, be it fleeting, made your chest tighten over and over again until you were half-convinced you were going into cardiac arrest. Eventually, Minho gave up trying to give you space and just let his knee rest against yours. Funnily enough, it helped you relax.

“Sorry,” he muttered.

“It’s fine.”

He was so hard to read these days. Not that he was ever easy to read. You couldn’t tell whether or not he liked having his knee there. You weren’t sure why you were getting so caught up on it in the first place.

You longed to hold his hand. You longed to hold Jisung’s hand. But all you could do was sit there in between the two and wait until you finally arrived at the airport. 

Thankfully, Minho was sat with his parents for the flight, which meant you were squeezed in between Jisung and Felix. You gave Jisung the window seat, knowing you wouldn’t get any sleep yourself. He looked like he wanted to argue when you offered it to him but ultimately surrendered when he saw the look in your eyes. You compromised for switching halfway through since the flight was so long but even that seemed to be pushing it for him. 

It was funny how Jisung was still looking out for you after everything you had done. It was as if it was instinctual to him, to put you before himself. The realization almost made you tear up. Had you cared that much for him too? Or was it all one-sided? Either way, you were positive you didn’t deserve him.

-

Dom had chosen Hawai’i as his destination. A controversial choice, given the state of tourism at the moment, but it wasn’t like you had much say in the matter. Jisung had confided in you earlier in the trip that he had tried to talk his father out of it but that he couldn’t be swayed. 

“We might as well try to make the most of it,” you argued. “It’s like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, right?”

He shrugged. “I guess.”

The flight from Bali to Hawai’i was over twelve hours long which meant that you had roughly six hours to figure out how to entertain yourself before it was time to trade places. You could try to sleep but that meant leaning on Jisung and you were almost positive the last thing he wanted was for you to touch him right now. 

You didn’t feel like paying for the in-flight wi-fi so you had to get creative with how to keep yourself busy. You scrolled through your camera roll for a while but it just made you sad. The pictures from the trip were one thing, but then there were all of the ones of you and Jisung back at school. The further back you went, the happier you seemed. There was no way that was actually true, it was just putting more distance between what had happened in the present from the way things were in the past. That, and you had a tendency to romanticize the past. 

“Did you know flight attendants are trained to take oxygen masks from passengers?”

Felix’s voice from beside you pulled you from your spiral of self-pity almost immediately. You turned to look at him and cocked your head in confusion. 

“What?”

“Like, you know that whole spiel they give you about safety before the plane takes off? And they’re like ‘during the flight, oxygen masks might drop from overhead’?”

“No, I know all of that. Why would they take the masks from passengers? Do they not have their own?”

“They do, but they might need to move around the cabin when that happens in case of an emergency or something, and if that were to be the case, they’re trained to take masks from passengers to oxygenate themselves. They’ll give it back, but in order to do their jobs they might have to borrow one without asking.”

“What if the passenger passes out?”

“Then they’ll be able to help them! Because they’re fully oxygenated.”

You made a face. “I’m glad you’ve got the aisle seat, then.”

Felix shrugged, grinning. “It sounds fucked up, but it’s just logistical. Wanna know something actually fucked up? These seat belts are practically useless.”

“What?” you weren’t sure if you really wanted to know where he was going with this but your morbid curiosity got the better of you once again. “What do you mean?”

“Well, they help with turbulence and stuff but in the event of a crash, these aren’t going to do shit for us. They’re just here to keep us strapped to the seat so they can identify the corpses by looking at the flight log.”

You sat there in stunned silence as the information Felix had just told you sunk in. 

“That is... so dark,” you said finally. 

“Yeah, but isn’t it interesting?”

“I guess, but why did you have to tell me all of this while we’re in the air?”

“Because it’s relevant!”

You sighed and glanced back at Jisung who was asleep and slumped against the window. “Ready to switch?”

It was just a joke but Felix scoffed nonetheless. 

“I’m offended,” he whispered. 

“And I’m traumatized.”

“My bad.”

Somehow, Felix kept you occupied until it was time to switch with Jisung. You lost track of time talking to him about everything and nothing. Out of all of the Han brothers, Felix was the one you knew the least. 

You learned a lot about him in the six and a half hours you sat next to each other. You learned that he, like Jisung, had a passion for photography. He liked anime but manga adaptations always disappointed. He wanted to be a dancer when he was little, just like his big brother. 

When it was Felix’s turn to inquire about you, you were sort of at a loss for words. You had to tread carefully around how much to actually reveal about yourself. When to lie, when to stretch the truth. You were exhausted. It was exhausting. But Jisung had made it clear that this was still important to him despite you not seeing the point anymore. So you played along for his sake. It was the least you could do since you ruined everything else. 

You talked mostly about school, what you were studying, what you wanted to do with your degree... all the small talk that usually took place when you first met a person, not after you’d been traveling with them for over a month. But Felix didn’t know a lot about you interests wise so he listened intently and asked a lot of questions. 

When it was finally time to actually switch, you were half-relieved, half-bummed. Talking with Felix was fun but you hated lying to him. 

Jisung lifted up the armrest between you and him to let you slide over while he stood awkwardly in the aisle. 

“Do you want to use my hoodie as a blanket, baby?” he asked.

“Sure, thanks.”

He laid it over your shoulders after you got settled against the window, kissing you on the head and telling you goodnight. 

You shut your eyes and tried to relax but sleep wouldn’t come. You knew it wouldn’t. You took deep breaths in an attempt to slow your heart rate, lowkey considering holding your breath until you passed out. 

Next to you, Jisung was flipping through the in-flight movies. You could hear him tapping on the touchscreen, huffing in frustration when he couldn’t find anything he wanted to watch. 

“You okay, bro?” Felix asked his twin. 

You felt Jisung sort of shift, likely checking to see if you were asleep. He sighed. 

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Relationship troubles?” Felix guessed.

“Why do you ask?”

“You’ve been pissy for like, the past two days. I assumed it had something to do with your girlfriend.”

“She hasn’t been sleeping well,” he explained simply, lying through his teeth. Well, it wasn’t technically a lie because you weren’t sleeping well, but that had nothing to do with why Jisung was upset. “The exhaustion has been leading to a lot of fights.”

“Sorry, man.”

 “It’s okay. It happens. Not that you would know.”

Felix scoffed. “Ouch, I try to have a heart-to-heart with you and you go there?”

“This is a heart-to-heart to you?”

“You know what I mean. A real conversation.”

“Okay, but I’m right. You wouldn’t know.”

“Not all of us can have healthy relationships like you, Jisung,” he sighed.

“I know. I think I’m mom and dad’s only chance at grandchildren at this point.”

“Not if our brother has anything to say about it,” Felix said lowly. 

“What do you mean?” Jisung asked.

He sounded genuinely confused but you knew that internally he was panicking because you were too. You were still pretending to be asleep but you had stopped breathing, waiting to hear what he would say next. How much did Felix know? You and Minho weren’t great at sneaking around but you had at least tried to be a little careful. 

“You mean you haven’t noticed the way Minho looks at her?”

“Not really? But you spend more time with him. You know him better than I do.”

“Well, you should pay more attention. He makes it kind of obvious,” Minho muttered.

“Makes what kind of obvious, though?”

“That he wants her.”

“What?” 

“I can’t believe you haven’t caught on to him flirting with her.” 

“Well obviously he’s doing it behind my back so-”

“Sorry you had to find out this way,” Felix said, likely grimacing, “but at least she isn’t reciprocating, from what I’ve seen.”

“Yeah, at least there’s that,” Jisung murmured. 

You were able to exhale in relief, but only slightly. Felix didn’t know everything but he could tell Minho was interested which wasn’t a good sign. How long had he been picking up on that? 

Your best friend sighed angrily. “The one thing I thought Minho couldn’t take from me-” 

You bit the inside of your cheek, guilt consuming you all over again. 

“Don’t you think that’s a little dramatic?” Felix asked. “He hasn’t even made a move or anything, mate. I just think he thinks she’s cute.”

“With Minho, that’s enough.”

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♡ˎˊ˗ part 4.5 - the aftermath

lee minho x reader x han jisung I recommend reading part 4 before you read this one!

summary: when you get home, emotions run high

word count: 5.2k

warnings: voyeurism & exhibitionism; unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it & pee after sex, guys); sloppy oral (m receiving); some degradation; jealousy; rough sex; boy on boy action; jisung calls minho daddy; dom!minho and sub!jisung

author’s note: so many of you actually asked for it after the last part, I couldn't say no. this turned out to be all smut? but I feel like a lot gets resolved. i love them a lot and i needed them to be okay <3 up next? part 5 for real!!! sorry to make you wait for sub!seungminnie. and my ask box is still open for any and all ideas and questions about the series!!!

series masterlist // skzms' general masterlist 🔖 taglist for the last part is open! message me or reply to be added, but please be 18+ and have your age somewhere on your blog or I won't add you

“And now, both of you, bedroom, right now.”

Jisung followed his order immediately, taking a step towards the bedroom, but you shook your head.

“I can’t possibly cum again,” you resisted, but when Minho looked at you, you knew you didn’t stand a chance.

”Oh, you can, and you will.”

Jisung skipped down the hallway readily, ripping off his hoodie and letting it drop to the floor carelessly. You watched Minho roll his eyes before his gaze came back to you.

But you didn’t budge. You didn’t fully know where the petty resolve came from, but you didn’t want to make it so easy for Minho. The way his eyes were burning into yours with such intensity, such simmering rage, it made your insides coil with excitement.

Minho motioned you towards the bedroom with a tiny jerk of his head.

You crossed your arms over your chest, staring back at him, unmoving

He scoffed out a breath and walked over to you. You were hyper aware of him, of the heat of his body, the width of his shoulders. He stalked towards you slowly, coming to stand behind you. You could feel his breath fan over the back of your neck and you couldn’t suppress the shudder that racked through your body.

His rough hands found your waist, running over your body and squeezing your hips roughly. The sensation of his hands on you was like a balm on your jealous, sex-addled brain. You needed him to show you he still loved you, even if you fucked them. Needed it like air.

Minho’s fingertips grazed the skin of your neck and you breathed out a sigh.

“I hate when they leave marks,” he mumbled behind you, a distinct softness in the bitter curl of his voice.

“I think that’s why they do it,” you breathed out in response, “they would probably love to know it pisses you off.”

Minho scoffed out behind you.

“Remind me why I let others touch you again?”

You hummed, leaning your body back into his only a little bit, only enough to feel his solid chest behind you.

“Because it makes you hard to lay claim over us again,” you murmured lowly, “and it makes you even harder that we come back to you every time.”

Minho breathed out a chuckle, lips grazing your neck as the air puffed against your skin.

“You do …”

He left the sentence hanging in the air, lips softly dragging along your throat until his nose was nuzzled behind your ear, inhaling deeply.

You were just about to ask what he meant when you heard Jisung call your names from the bedroom.

“Someone come in here before I start by myself,” he threatened, and Minho chuckled into your hair. His hands on your hips tightened as he pushed you forward and you let him guide you into the bedroom readily, the feeling of putting your agency back in his hands like coming home.

Predictably, Jisung was lounging on the bed entirely naked as he languidly stroked himself. When you and Minho came into view, he sat up, letting his hand drop from his cock.

Slowly, gently, he slid off the bed, dropping to his knees at the foot of it, staring up at you and Minho with wide, wet eyes. You watched Minho’s eyes rake down his body, gaze catching painfully on the bruise on Jisung’s collarbone. He growled.

“Tell me she left that on you,” he pressed out, and Jisung shivered, squeezing his legs together slightly. He shook his head.

“Who did?” Minho asked and you all knew the answer to the question. Jisung shivered again, shuffling closer to Minho until he was kneeling right in front of him. Without answering, he started undoing Minho’s belt, eagerly. The metal clinked against Minho’s thighs. Before Jisung could pop the button of his jeans, Minho’s hand wound into his hair and pulled him backwards roughly. Jisung whimpered wetly.

“Who? Did?” Minho said, low and rough, enunciating each word with venom.

“Ch- Channie-hyung,” Jisung breathed out and you watched Minho’s eyes darken. You wondered briefly why he would make himself suffer.

“Princess, you said he looked like he was falling in love?”

You reeled, your eyes snapping from where you had been watching Jisung up to meet Minho’s scalding eyes. You nodded shakily.

“Words, princess.”

“He … Jisung looked so … pretty, just like he looks when he sucks you off,” your voice is just as shaky, and you know you’re skirting around the topic.

Minho laughed humourlessly, but he let go of Jisung’s hair. Jisung’s hands immediately scrambled to undo his pants the rest of the way, dragging them down Minho’s thighs.

“That’s not what I asked,” Minho said coldly.

Jisung leaned forward, burying his face in Minho’s boxers, taking a deep breath, a shudder racking through his body. He nudged at Minho’s hard cock through the thin material, his hands splayed over Minho’s thick thighs.

“He looked … flustered,” you finally said, defeated.

Jisung choked out a whine and pulled down Minho’s boxers, pressing feverish kisses to the junction of his thigh.

“He looked at Channie’s dick like he loved it,” you continued, eyes flickering back and forth between Minho and Jisung, your panties soaked, your body trembling with adrenaline.

“When he put it in his mouth, his eyes fluttered shut and everything,” you breathed out.

Jisung’s kisses finally reached Minho’s cock, his lips dragging along the velvety length of it, pressing a reverential kiss to the head.

“He whimpered … when Chan grabbed his hair,” you finally said and let out a shaky breath. Minho’s eyes were darker than you’d ever seen them as he watched Jisung place chaste kitten licks all over Minho’s cock, worshipping it with his mouth.

“Now look at you,” Minho breathed out, and Jisung winced, rubbing his thighs against one another. “You got anything to say for yourself?”

Jisung shook his head, blinking up at Minho as he flattened his tongue against the underside of Minho’s cock.

“You were so desperate for Chan’s cock earlier, why do you need mine? Fucking slut,” Minho barked out, and Jisung preened, shuffling closer and sinking Minho’s cock into his mouth, bobbing his head a few times before popping off.

“Yours is better,” he croaked out, voice already wrecked, “yours is the best.”

Minho hummed as Jisung sunk him back into his mouth, and you swallowed hard. You felt like you were about to explode with arousal, despite the three orgasms at the studio. You whimpered quietly, but Minho heard, as always. His eyes whipped over to you with a knowing smirk.

“You’re no better, are you? I assume you’ve had three cocks today, you don’t need any more.”

You shook your head frantically. Oh, he wouldn’t, he couldn’t, could he? Deny you the catharsis you so desperately needed, the hot ache of him claiming you. You would die.

“I …,” your voice nearly gave out as your pussy throbbed in your soiled panties, “I always need yours.”

Minho chuckled darkly. Jisung was blowing him in earnest now, the wet squelch of his mouth lewdly ringing through the quiet bedroom.

And, fuck, Jisung looked ruined, eyes closed, cheeks bright pink, spit dribbling down his chin as he took Minho in as deep as he could, choked little moans scratching at his throat.

“Is that so?” Minho asked mockingly, and his tone went straight to your pussy, making you clench around nothing.

You fell to your knees almost automatically, exactly where you stood. Your hand fisted the edge of the skirt as you waited, staring up at Minho with shaking eyes. After a few agonising seconds, he finally motioned his hand for you to come over, and you made the humiliating shuffle across the floor. Every move was calculated for, but your chest still fluttered when approval shimmered in Minho’s eyes.

You came to kneel next to Jisung, who immediately dropped one hand from Minho’s thigh, blindly reaching for your hand and lacing his fingers with yours. He squeezed it so tightly you heard your knuckle pop. Minho watched the motion without a flinch, but he must’ve perceived something because he didn’t ask Jisung to stop.

Jisung made way for you and you carefully leaned in, your check brushing Jisung’s. From up close, you could hear every tortured gasp Jisung let out when Minho’s cock hit the back of his throat. You licked at the base of Minho’s cock chastely, tasting Minho’s skin and Jisung’s spit. It was filthy in a way that felt like home.

But before you could go in any further, Minho pulled you both off with his hands, holding you at a distance from his wet, twitching cock. For a second, he just looked down at you, eyes wandering from Jisung, naked, panting, lips swollen and eyes wide as he stared up at him expectantly, to you, still dressed in the same clothes they had fucked you in, your eyes so glazed and needy and ready to give him anything.

Minho bit back the moan that was threatening to force itself out his chest and let go of your hair.

He sauntered over to the foot of the bed, letting himself drop onto the mattress and spreading his legs. Jisung immediately took the hint and crawled over, giving you a beautiful view of his ass and toned thighs, where there was still the shadow of a hickey on the junction between his ass and his thigh.

“Clothes, off,” Minho barked at you, and you didn’t waste a single second pulling down your skirt and panties and shrugging out of the sweatshirt you had only haphazardly thrown back on after the debauchery at the studio. As you crawled over to where Jisung was perched between Minho’s thighs, you saw Minhos eyes flicker to your hips briefly, where you knew Chan’s nails had left red scratches when he held you. You silenced any potential comment by running your hand up his thigh, and he shivered. Jisung was kissing up his other thigh before taking Minho’s cock back in his mouth, sliding his tongue along the bottom needily.

You leaned in, licking at Minho’s shaft, your eyes fluttering shut at tasting him again. Your lips brushed against Jisung’s and he whimpered. When your tongues met, Jisung’s hand slithered up your back until it was tangled in your hair, pulling your lips to his around Minho, brushing the head of his cock with every swipe of his tongue against yours. When the tip of his cock slipped even deeper between your hot mouths, a deep groan rumbled from Minho’s chest, his hand meeting Jisung’s in your hair, trying to push you down further.

You complied easily, Jisung letting you slide Minho’s cock in your mouth as he pushed Minho’s legs further apart and dipped his head down, running his tongue over the skin of Minho’s balls. Minho rewarded him with another deep groan, his hips canting forward instinctively, allowing Jisung to sink deeper. Jisung sucked one of Minho’s balls into his mouth at the same time as you took his cock deeper into your throat, and looked up at him.

Minho’s head fell back briefly, eyes screwing shut and bunny teeth digging into his bottom lip as he grunted out. He was a vision like this, deep flush on his cheeks that ran down his chiselled chest, his nipples hard, looking good enough to eat. When his eyes met yours, they were swimming with arousal and a glint of something much darker. But he just kept staring, his lips slightly parted, enough to let out tiny gasps of pleasure. You sank deeper, until you felt him nudge the back of your throat, making a tear slip out of the corner of your eye. Minho’s hand tightened in your hair. His, his, his, his, his. All his.

Jisung’s finger came up to where you were bobbing on Minho’s cock, swiping up some of the mix of spit and pre-cum that was spilling past your lips before dipping lower, and then, suddenly, Minho’s hips almost jumped off the bed, making the tip of his cock brush the back of your throat so hard you gagged around him.

You couldn’t see what Jisung was doing, but you assumed it had something to do with his slick finger on Minho’s rim because he flung one of Minho’s legs over his shoulders and dipped lower. You bobbed your head as regularly as you could without getting in Jisung’s way.

Minho was slowly falling apart above you, and you couldn’t rip your eyes away from him. His domineering role was momentarily forgotten as his arms gave out, and he collapsed onto his elbows, head thrown back as his hips rocked slightly in time with the bobs of your head, no doubt rubbing himself against Jisung’s finger at the same time. He was throbbing in your mouth, shaky whines dripping from his lips as his movements got faster and faster, rutting himself into you and Jisung’s waiting mouths.

It didn’t take long before he fell apart with a wail, clenching around Jisung’s fingertip as he spilled into your mouth in thick ropes. It was so much you could barely swallow it all, some of it spilling past the corners of your mouth and down your chin.

You heard Jisung whisper out a quiet fuck as he watched Minho fall apart. Only you and Jisung knew Minho like this, only you could make him fall apart so completely. Arousal burning in you so strong it almost hurt. You let his spent cock fall from your lips and were about to wipe your mouth on the edge of the sheets when Jisung cradled your neck and crashed his lips into yours, licking Minho’s cum from your chin greedily.

Now it was Minho who cursed out above you as he watched Jisung clean you up with filthy, open-mouthed kisses, Jisung’s fingers wrapped tightly around the base of his own cock. Only Jisung would be at the risk of cumming untouched just from licking his lover’s cum from his other lover’s lips.

The noises you were making into Jisung’s lips were pitiful, mind getting foggier with every swipe of Jisung’s tongue against yours, his body pressing into you, trying to tug you closer and closer.

Minho sat up, and used his discarded t-shirt to wipe his stomach clean, before he leaned forward, tangling his hand into Jisung’s hair and pulling him away from your lips gently.

“Don’t get too lost in it now, my cockdrunk little babies,” he cooed raspily, the traces of his orgasm still in his voice, but already back to his usual self. “I’m not done with you yet.”

Jisung blinked up at him blearily.

“Fuck me,” he whispered, and a breath caught in Minho’s throat. “Fuck me, please, daddy, I need it.”

Minho kissed him hard, swallowing Jisung’s mewls, letting him tangle his hands in Minho’s hair for a second, before pulling back, helping him to his feet and guiding him to lie on the bed. He pressed two soft kisses to the red bruises on his knees.

“I’ll fuck you, baby,” he murmured out before turning to kneel next to you, cupping your face, brushing his thumb over your swollen bottom lip. Still talking to Jisung but with his eyes fixed on you, he continued, “… but while I do that, I need you to tell me all about our princess and Changbin, yeah? Can you do that?”

Jisung winced, but hummed out an approval. Your heart started beating faster in your chest again, the dark possessiveness in Minho’s voice filling you with dread and arousal and the all-encompassing need to show him that you were his and his alone.

Just when you thought your heart was going to jump out of your chest, Minho kissed you and it made your whole world reel. You never wanted to let him go, wanted to kiss him forever, the taste of him on your tongue forever and ever. It took everything in you not to sob when he pulled back and looked at you. You felt dizzy and sad and needy, and you didn’t bother to hide it because you knew he would take care of you. And he did, brushing a reassuring thumb across your cheekbone and pressing another deep kiss to your lips before helping you up.

He guided you down to straddle Jisung, who was beaming up at you with the most fucked out grin. He was already blissfully far gone.

“Don’t you dare fuck him, princess,” Minho warned you, and Jisung whimpered, pouting up at you. “You already had each other today. You can kiss and grind a little while I prep him, but that’s it.”

You nodded in assent, already dragged into Jisung’s orbit by the way he was staring up at you. He leaned up as you leaned down and you found each other’s lips for the umpteenth time today, and yet it felt like the first time.

While Minho was getting out the lube and the condoms, Jisung ravished your mouth, kissing you so eagerly you could barely keep up. But then Minho’s wet finger pushed into him, and he nearly yelled into your mouth, his hips jumping desperately. Minho chuckled behind you.

“Fucking desperate,” he spat out, and Jisung mewled happily.

While Minho was working him open, Jisung kept kissing you, his hands coming to your hips, digging his fingers into your skin as he slowly guided them down until your bare pussy was brushing against his dick. He moaned into your mouth, using his hands to swivel your hips so the head of his cock caught at your hole. You were so drunk on him that you didn’t realise what he was doing until he pushed just the head of his cock into you, and you moaned out loudly.

Suddenly, a hand came down on your ass so hard you shrieked, ripping your mouth away from Jisung’s just in time to see his eyes roll into the back of his head with a yell of his own when Minho slapped his balls.

“Jisungie, what did Daddy tell you?” Minho purred out behind you, and Jisung’s face pulled into a bratty smile, his head rocking back as Minho was still rutting his fingers into him.

“Technically, you only told Y/Nie not to fuck me,” he said, winking at your shocked face.

Another hard slap landed on Jisung’s balls, and this time he moaned out so pornographically it made you clench around nothing. But then he whined out in dismay and you guessed Minho had pulled out his fingers, leaving him empty.

“Maybe I should let Chan-hyung have you, you little brat,” Minho hissed, and you could see Jisung’s eyebrows furrow. If you weren’t so fucking turned on, you would be impressed with how easily Minho controlled the two of you.

“No, no, no,” Jisung mewled, his fingers digging into your hips as he resisted the urge to press you down and onto his waiting cock. The proximity made you dizzy.

But then Jisung’s eyes rolled back into his head, his whole body writhing and his hands falling to the sheets and you knew Minho had pushed his cock into him.

“Then prove you’re worth my time,” Minho continued, a little breathless from where Jisung was clenching around him. “Why don’t you start by telling me about our princess and Changbin, hm?” Jisung whined as Minho pulled out and pushed all the way back in.

“You said she enjoyed it. What does that mean, baby?”

Jisung gasped out, his hand wrapping around your arm to hold himself steady.

“Y/Nie moaned so much,” he breathed out, before moaning again, “was riding him on the chair, kissing him the whole time.”

Minho started to set an agonising pace and Jisung mewled. He went back and forth between his eyes fluttering closed and staring up at you with stars in his eyes from finally getting exactly what he needed.

“Go on, Jisungie,” Minho spoke.

“Changbin … fuck, Changbin-hyung was so eager. Kept calling her beautiful,” Jisung breathed, and you gasped when you felt Minho’s fingers glide through your slick. Jisung furrowed his brow as he looked up at you. There was the same glint in his eyes as earlier.

“He called her ‘the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen’.”

One of Minho’s fingers slid inside you and moaned out, head falling between your arms.

“God, fuck, harder Daddy, please … hhngg,” Jisung begged desperately, but Minho slapped his ass desperately.

“You take what I say you deserve,” he spat out, and his voice was so much more venomous than it was earlier. The latter’s finger was still sliding in and out of you, so slowly you felt like you were going insane.

“Y/Nie got flustered,” Jisung said, and Minho pulled his fingers from you and slammed his hips into Jisung’s, making you and Jisung moan out for completely opposite reasons. This time, Minho didn’t have to ask for Jisung to supply details.

“She blushed, oh fuck,” Jisung moaned, as Minho finally fucked him harder, “she didn’t even have a comeback, just told him to shut up, all bashfully. Fuck, it made me so fucking … hnngg it made me so jealous.”

Jisung was staring at you and you were staring back, your eyes wide as you watched all the emotions go through Jisung’s eyes. Suddenly, two fingers pushed back inside you and you whimpered, pushing your hips back instinctively. But Minho didn’t let you do it, almost immediately pulling his fingers out again. You groaned out in frustration.

“I … fuck, daddy, right there … I took her hand while she was blowing him,” Jisung continued, eyes always coming back to yours, “I took it, but she dropped it just … you just dropped it when he pulled you up, baby, what the fuck.”

This was fucking torture.

You dipped down and pressed your lips to Jisung’s, his hand winding into your hair immediately as he sighed into your mouth. Minho’s fingers slid back into you as he bottomed out in Jisung, and you moaned into each other’s lips.

“You … fuck, I’m so close, … you flirted back with him, so fucking hard. You were so gone when you were riding him, you made noises I never heard you make before,” Jisung was still babbling, and you could tell he was serious, even while he was getting fucked within an inch of his life. Minho growled somewhere behind you, pumping his fingers into so well your vision was going fuzzy.

“Min …. Daddy … please, harder,” Jisung’s voice had that tremor that always showed up when he was so, so close to cumming.

“Then finish telling me,” Minho barked out behind you. He sounded wrecked, but you didn’t look back.

“She let him cum in her mouth,” Jisung continued, and Minho suddenly picked up the pace, snapping his hips into Jisung mercilessly. Jisung’s eyes rolled into the back of his head as he held on to you for dear life. As if this would buy him the permission to cum, he kept babbling.

“She came with her forehead against his,” Jisung almost yelled, and Minho placed a hard slap on your pussy, one that made you cry out.

“She fell apart in his lap while staring into his fucking eyes.”

Everything that happened next, happened in a blur. One second you were kneeling over Jisung, the next Minho had pulled you upright, lining you up with Jisung’s cock before pushing you down, forcing you to take him all the way to the hilt, all without the pace of his own hips even faltering a little bit. You blindly reached for Jisung’s hands, intertwining both with yours as Minho’s hand wrapped around your throat, pulling your back flush against his chest as his hips snapped into Jisung’s. Jisung was pulsing inside of you for only a few seconds before he came with a deafening wail you were sure the neighbours heard loud and clear, painting your walls with waves and waves of his release.

Minho fucked Jisung through his orgasm slowly, making sure he was fully sated.

You were … terrified of turning around to look at Minho. You were so horny, of course you were, but you were also terrified of having crossed a real, not pretend, not consensual line somewhere. You were terrified that Jisung was really upset, that Minho was really angry, that he would take you from behind and call you degrading names and you wouldn’t know whether it was real or not. You were just considering uttering your safe word when Minho’s arm softly wrapped around your waist and lifted you off Jisung, placing you on the bed on your back.

You screwed your eyes shut, trying to delay the moment of truth for a second longer.

“Hey,” Minho’s soft voice called you, his strong body settling between your legs. The warmth of his skin, the weight of his body, it was comforting.

“Honey, open your eyes,” he cooed softly, and you carefully cracked one eye open. As soon as you saw his soft expression, you opened the other one, letting go of the breath you didn’t know you were holding. You pulled Minho down into your lips, kissing him breathlessly, desperately.

“I don’t care about Changbin,” you gasped out when he pulled back. You turned your head to find Jisung already looking at you. You reached out a hand until he shuffled over to you, and you could press a kiss to his lips, too.

“I’m not in love with Changbin,” you said again, firmer this time, “I’m not in love with anyone but you. And I’m so fucking in love with you.”

You swallowed down the tears as you looked back at Minho.

“I don’t care about Chan, either,” Jisung said next to you, so quietly you barely heard him. Minho’s hand shot out to cradle Jisung’s face. “He could never compare to you. Like, never.”

Minho nodded at him softly before looking back at you. You could feel him hard and heavy against your thigh, and you could hardly breathe with how badly you needed him.

You nudged Minho’s hips and reached down to align himself with you.

“Take me,” you whispered, and Jisung took a shuddering breath next to you. Minho’s eyes fluttered shut briefly.

“Are you sure, baby?” he murmured, but you just nodded.

“Need to feel you, need to feel you still love me,” you mumbled, face flushing hot as your eyes closed in shame. Minho’s hand came up to your face, forcing you to open your eyes and look into his.

“I love you. I’ll always love you, both of you,” Minho said seriously, as he slowly pushed himself inside of you, pressing in until he was buried to the hilt. It wasn’t hard, with everything that had happened today, with how turned on you were, Jisung’s release making the slide impossibly wetter, still.

Your legs wrapped around Minho’s back automatically when he started fucking you deep and slow. When your head fell to the side again, you found Jisung already staring at you.

“I’m sorry,” you whimpered out, and Jisung scooted closer, pressing his body against yours, one hand coming up to caress your cheeks. He shushed you softly.

“Don’t be, I love you, baby,” he mumbled, pressing hot kisses on your cheek and jaw as Minho’s hips snapped into yours over and over again.

You could feel your orgasm build within minutes, Minho’s body so close to yours as he rolled his hips into yours, his flushed face above you as he gasped in tandem with your own quiet moans. Jisung was wrapped around your side, one hand playing with your tits as he continued to kiss your neck. Everything was hot, burning hot, your own skin becoming sticky as perspiration started beading on Minho’s forehead.

Minho leaned in and kissed you so deeply, you thought you might start crying.

“I love you so fucking much, baby,” he mumbled against your lips, “I’m never letting you go.”

“‘M close,” you whined out, and Minho rutted into you that bit harder and deeper. Jisung’s hand slowly made its way between your bodies, his finger coming to your clit and rubbing perfectly.

“Only you can fuck us like this, Min,” you breathed out, and you felt Minho’s hips falter. Jisung moaned softly against your neck, nodding slightly.

“Cum for me, angel, come on,” Minho gasped out, cursing under his breath as you fluttered around him.

Your orgasm crashed over you at his words, waves and waves of pleasure rolled through your body as you trembled in Jisung’s arms, clenching around Minho and taking him over the edge with you. He collapsed into you as his hips stuttered into you, pressing in as deeply as he could before he came, his face buried in your neck, arm wrapped around you and Jisung as he filled you up.

It was quiet then, except for the heartbeat thundering in your ears, Jisung still pressing sweet kisses to your cheek and Minho softly panting into your other ear.

Minho didn’t lift his head for a long time, just softly breathed into your neck. You didn’t move to disturb him, something telling you that he was trying to figure something out. You gave him the time, both you and Jisung lying there silently with your bodies intertwined, you running your hand through Minho’s hair, Jisung caressing Minho’s back.

Eventually, Minho lifted his head and stared at you and Jisung in turn.

“I don’t want to stop doing this,” he said, and you furrowed your eyebrows in question, but he just continued. “I’m sorry for being a jealous, possessive boyfriend. I don’t like that about myself. But the thought of you realising you could do better, it kills me.”

Jisung next to you made a sad noise of protest, but Minho shook his head.

“Let me finish. I’m sorry I’m jealous, and I’m sorry it gets the better of me. I trust you. More than I trust anyone. And I know if you had feelings for someone, you would tell me. That’s thanks to you, by the way,” he said the last thing with a long look at you, but you were speechless, “so I don’t want to stop doing this. I want us to keep having fun because I love it and I know the two of you love it and the sex afterwards is incredible and also because, oddly enough, it makes me feel closer to you. Okay?”

You felt Jisung next to you nod, and you did the same.

“Good, we can talk about the rest tomorrow, okay?”

The two of you nodded again, and Minho slowly pulled out of you and got up, walking into the bathroom to get some wet towels to clean you up. You and Jisung didn’t speak, just kept holding each other. The other side of your body was cold now, and you shivered slightly, which made Jisung rub his hand up and down your arm to try to warm you up.

Yeah, you would be alright.

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a life remembered | l.mh, h.js

wc: 4.6k

genre: soulmate au; reincarnation au; fluff; angst; poly!minsung x reader

cw: primarily Han pov; illusions to suggestive conversation; concert highs; anxiety/panic attack mentions; food/eating mentions; Bee (I feel like they need a warning lol, love them the most); arguing but bc they care (not between the soulmates); please let me know if I missed anything

part one: a life forgotten

Soulmates are a curious thing. Everyone has them, and someway, somehow, they always find each other.

When Lee Minho walked into JYP Entertainment for the first time, Jisung didn’t know what to do or how to react, and looking back on it now, it was comical. Minho was, in Jisungs opinion, one of, if not the most, handsome man he’d ever seen. It had struck a chord in him he’d chosen to interpret as jealousy.

When Chan told him he wanted to include Minho in the group he was creating, Jisung couldn’t decide if he was giddy or nervous. He’d met the other boy twice and couldn’t shake the overwhelming feeling that they knew each other. It wasn’t until their third meeting, the first one in an official capacity, to learn the song Chan wanted to showcase, that Jisung realized why.

The small space of the practice room they were designated to made the group circle a tight one, Minho rushing in and dropping to the floor in the open spot between Jisung and Felix, accidentally brushing against Jisung in the process and shooting them both headfirst into a memory both could swear wasn’t theirs.

Water surrounded them in every direction, the sounds of laughter filling the air. The ship rocked gently as the waves pushed it along steadily.

Minho took Jisungs hand, leading him to the edge of the ship. 

“Where is your beautiful mind right now, my love?” 

And although it didn’t feel like he was talking to Minho, and there was no response, Jisung’s smile lit up his entire face, his eyes twinkling in pure content.

“Come back to the group, love. The boys are going to start their whining if you ignore them for too long.” Minho groaned.

Again there was no response, as if a chunk of their memory for this specific moment was still missing.

“You know how your boys can get.” Jisung waved nonchalantly, hand grasping at thin air before the two turned back to join the rest of the crew.

Practice was immediately derailed as they were brought back to the present, everyone looking worried as they surrounded the pair.

“What just happened?” Changbin asked, holding Jisungs shoulder to keep him steady.

“I’m not entirely sure.” Jisung couldn’t stop himself from seeking out Minho’s eyes, which were already on him, holding the softest expression Jisung has ever seen in his life.

“Please tell me you saw the ship too.” Minho whispered, voice unsure, hand grasping Jisungs for dear life and all he could do was nod. Minho started nodding along with him, the two slowly morphing from shock to joy as smiles spread across their faces.

Tears pricked at Jisungs eyes the more the realization hit him.

“We’re soulmates.”

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Five years. 

In five years, so much had changed for Han Jisung. In just five years he’d met not only the love of his life, but also his soul brothers, a realization they came to some time after the soulmate realization, as Minho and Jisung saw the rest of the members in almost all of their past lives. 

In five years Stray Kids had also risen to a level of fame not one of them had predicted. They were living a life their younger selves could have only hoped to dream of, and they were so beyond grateful and happy to be able to keep doing music together.

But also within those five years, Minho and Jisung had come to the conclusion that something was missing. They were absolutely positive that they were soulmates, of that there was not even a shadow of a doubt, but there were too many holes in their shared memories, conversations that felt one sided, moments in bed with a gap between them that shouldn't be there if they were at peace with one another. But the confirmation that they were missing a piece came in a memory that surfaced much later than the rest, one with Jisung storming up to Minho’s door, fist banging in anger, wedding band adorning his finger but not Minho’s. 

That memory was one of Jisung being angry with Minho and not even knowing who he was, with Minho knowing of Jisung but not knowing him personally, of them both being in love with a person that wasn’t the other. Minho is positive he’d despise cheaters in every life, yet was accused of sleeping with a married person. Neither Jisung, nor Minho could remember Jisungs spouse's name, what they looked like, what gender they were, all they knew was that both of them loved them, and they both loved them as desperately as they love one another, and that was enough to convince them that the piece missing was a third soulmate.

They didn’t know how to go about it, they couldn’t even be allowed to share the truth of their relationship and thousands of Stays were claiming to be each members soulmates daily just for a chance of meeting them. The chances of finding their third and final piece was slim at absolute best. 

People always say trust the soulmate connection and that time would bring them together, but that was hard knowing you couldn’t remember someone you love. 

Han Jisung spent far too many concerts and fan meets searching the crowd in hopes that you’d be there, that he’d finally find you and the trio would finally be complete. Likewise, he’d spent just as many nights disappointed that you were nowhere to be found. With their fame came the higher likelihood of you being able to find them, but that also meant it’d be harder for them to find you. However, Chan and his soulmate, Riley, gave Jisung hope that he would find you.

Lee Minho wanted to find you just as badly, though he looked for you in the mundane. Whilst his partner expected you to reach out via their fame, Minho hoped more for bumping into you on the sidewalk or in a coffee shop, it made him feel more attainable. Minho knew that whilst Riley and Chan made it work, and even Bee and Changbin, there were just as many people that would be scared off by celebrity soulmates as there are seeking them. 

Another concert, another night of Jisung daydreaming about finding you in the crowd and whisking you away after to finally meet you and remember you. Riley gave Chan a knowing glare, the parental figures of the group concerned about their younger friend. Ever since the two soulmates came to the conclusion they have a third one, which isn’t unheard of but is fairly rare, their friends have been doubtful to say the least. 

No one likes seeing the kicked puppy look on Jisungs face whenever someone mentions that maybe there isn’t anyone else out there, or the way Minho gets defensive when they try to talk to him about the possibility of their memories just not having fully solidified yet. Both in the firm belief that five years connected at the hip was enough time to remember everything. But that didn’t stop the worried glances and strained smiles when they’d start talking about their ‘other soulmate’.

“They’re gonna be here tonight.” Jisung stated as if it were an absolute fact.

“You said that last night, Sungie.” Hyunjin muttered.

“Yeah, but I can feel it this time. They’re in the crowd right now, I’m positive of it.”

“Ji, you have an incredible soulmate already, why are you so eager to find another one?” Bee asked from their almost permanent place snuggled into Changbin. “I’m just saying, I can’t imagine dealing with more than one Binnie.”

“They’re not another Minho, they’re mine and Min’s missing piece.” Jisung argued. It was a conversation that felt all too familiar, and every time one of his soul brothers or other lifetime friends make comments, he feels himself getting just a little more hostile but also a little more defeated.

Maybe they were wrong, maybe there wasn’t a missing piece and they truly just haven’t had the best relationship in every lifetime. But Jisung couldn’t bring himself to believe that. Seeing how whole Bee and Bin, and Riley and Chan, were, how they didn’t have memory gaps or questionable moments and conversations, made him feel like there was no other explanation aside from another person to fill the void. It wasn’t like Jisung thought Minho wasn’t enough for him, he wasn’t seeking more from outside their relationship, he loved Minho with every fiber of his being, but he knew Minho wasn’t the only one he’d hold these feelings towards. And Minho knew it too, it was a long conversation to have, one that ended in tears but mutual understanding that they would always have each other and weren’t seeking out this third person for any reason other than them wholeheartedly believing they are also their soulmate.

As the time to go on stage got closer and closer, Jisung felt more antsy. He wasn’t sure why tonight felt different, but he couldn’t stop fidgeting. Minho tried to calm him down, but was just as on edge. 

The concert went smoothly, they always did, but Minho and Jisung both spent far more time engaging towards one specific area than they ever had before. It’s like they couldn’t abandon the section for longer than a few minutes and they always ended up right back there the second they could. Jisung felt better than he had in a long time, adrenaline pumping through his veins and a smile plastered on his face. He felt good, he felt whole for the first time in a long time. Jisung couldn’t explain it, but that stage was the most at home he’d felt since he first found Minho.

As they said their goodbyes to Stay and made their way backstage, the overwhelming peace Jisung had felt slowly faded. He couldn’t think of any reason why, but as he watched Riley smother his leader with kisses and Bee put his best friend into a headlock, he felt himself growing more numb. 

Minho wrapped his arms around him, nuzzling into his shoulder, relieving the aching feeling sinking in so fast it would have given Jisung whiplash if he weren’t already used to the other boys' affect on him, body and mind. Jisung could feel giggles bubbling up in him with each soft kiss placed on the base of his neck.

“You were radiant out there tonight, my love.”

“And you were very sexy.” Jisung giggled.

“Hey now! There are children present!” Riley scolded, breaking away from Chan to cover Jeongin’s ears. “Go foreplay somewhere else.”

“Yeah!” Bee shouted from Changbin’s back. “There’s dressing rooms for a reason!”

The look of absolute dismay Riley shot Bee was priceless, “That’s not what the dressing rooms are for.” 

“It’s not? Did you know that bro?”

Changbins ears were red. “Please don’t call me bro while talking about this.”

“How about we just all get showered and changed and go grab something to eat?” Chan suggested in a tone that left no room for argument, clapping his hands together and pulling Riley back towards his body. “And stop babying Innie, he’s worse than Bee these days.”

“I will never stop babying my baby, but I am hungry.” Riley muttered in agreement. “If y’all take too long in the shower, we’re leaving without you.” Riley pointed at Bee and Changbin, who’s ears somehow got even more red. Bee just winked at their best friend, shiteating grin plastered on their face.

Twenty minutes later, Jisung piled into the van with his bandmates and additional soulmates, Seungmin and Hyunjin discussing what they wanted to eat whilst Felix snuggled into Bee’s side, the two looking at memes while Changbin pouted.

Jisung felt more drained than he had in a long time, his social battery past empty and moved on to completely fried. Minho pulling him into his side eased some of the anxiousness starting to well up.

“No panic attacks after amazing shows.” Minho whispered.

Jisung buried his head further into the other mans neck. “I’m trying.”

“I know.” He kissed the crown of his head gently, smiling softly while tightening his hold. “I’m seriously so proud of you.”

The ride was uneventful out to the opposite side of the city, in hopes less people would recognize them so they could have their meal in peace. Minho and Jisung were the last of the group to venture out of the vehicle and towards the restaurant. They didn’t get too far before a voice rapping along to Han’s part to All In stopped them dead in their tracks.

“Y/n, please, you’re in public.” 

“You’re wasting your breath, you know how they are about their spotlight songs.”

Han’s eyes landed on the person rapping his line with such ease it was as if they’d written it themself. He felt excitement flood through him instantaneously, rushing over and joining them, singing along to the song playing quietly in the outdoor speakers overhead.

He watched your eyes light up as the two of you sang along together, ignoring your friends and focusing on one another. Not a thing in the world was registering to either of you as you both turned to Minho, watching as he rolled his eyes, smile already playing at his lips, joining in for the last parts of the song.

Your laughter filled the air as the song came to an end, and Jisung could swear it was already becoming one of his favorite sounds. 

“Took you long enough.”

Your voice was laced with amusement.

“Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“You know I don’t like singing by myself.” You nudged his shoulder lightly, causing him to wrap his arm around your shoulders and squeeze tight.

“But your voice is so nice!”

A blush lit up your cheeks in an instant, mouth opening to respond when someone clearing their throat behind you drew the groups attention.

“Y/n, um, what?”

“Min! Sungie! Hurry your asses up or we’re gonna eat without you.” Bee shouted from down the way, drawing Jisungs attention just long enough for you to slip out of his hold.

By the time he or Minho could focus back on you, you were gone. No trace of a person having been standing with them, as if you’d been a figment of their imagination.

“Sungie…”

“I know.”

“That was…”

“Yeah.”

Minho was staring off into the direction you had to have gone in, itching to run after you. Jisung stared at his hands, in disbelief that just moments prior he was holding the final piece of his puzzle in those same hands.

You, the random stranger unabashedly performing one of their songs in the middle of the street, were the one person Jisung and Minho had been looking for incessantly. The person they knew they couldn’t remember. 

“Do you ever wonder what we’d be like if we didn’t find each other? What’d it’d be like if we don’t keep finding each other?”

Jisung was used to thinking these types of questions, but hearing you ask them out loud hurt more than him thinking them ever did.

“I’d rather imagine we’ll always find each other.” Jisung grumbled, tightening his hold on both of the bodies on either side of his.

“Okay but what if-”

“There are no what if’s, my love. We’ll always find one another, in every lifetime, even if some take a little longer than others. I don’t see a reason to dwell on the impossibility of not ending up right back here every single time.”

You snuggled deeper into Jisungs chest, hand squeezing Minho’s.

“I suppose you’re right.” You mumbled. Minho squeezed your hand comfortingly in response. 

Jisungs arms shifted entirely around you, squeezing as he rolled over to toss you in the middle, both of your soulmates wanting to hold you close. You sighed in content, snuggling into your boys happily.

“I am so dead serious right now, you two. We will absolutely eat without you if you don’t- why do your faces look like that?”

“We found them.”

“Found who? Why are you being cryptic.”

“We found our other soulmate.” Jisung said.

Bee’s mouth dropped open and within moments all of their brothers and Riley were there, bombarding them with questions.

“Okay, so is no one surprised that they actually have another soulmate? Is that just me?” Hyunjin said, a smack from Seungmin following shortly after. 

“Which direction did they go? We need to find them!” Jeongin said, already shifting from one foot to the other as if he were ready to sprint in any direction in a moments notice. 

“We didn’t actually see what direction they went in because somebody distracted us.” Jisung glared at Bee.

“Oh, I’m sorry I’m hungry and didn’t know.” They huffed.

“We were facing that way so they definitely couldn’t have gone in that direction.” Minho cut in, knowing a grumpy Jisung and a hangry Bee is never a good combination. They loved each other like siblings but damn could they argue until they both turned blue.

“Alright, everyone pick a direction and let's find our boys’ soulmate.” Chan said, “Go in pairs and meet here in one hour, no exceptions. Even if everyone comes back empty handed, we have to at least try.” Turning to his first and last children, his eyes and tone softened. “Is there anything we can use to recognise them?”

Jisung immediately jumped into a full description, followed by Minho simply saying, “Ask if they know ‘All In’. They were singing it with us just now.”

Nods all around as people started pairing up.

“Okay, I’m going with Ji.” Riley stated, looping their arm through Jisungs. “Channie, you take Min. Bin and Bee, separate. I am not dealing with soulmates getting distracted and off mission right now.”

Before Jisung could even think about protesting, he was being swept away by Riley in the first direction he would have guessed you ran in. Jisung struggled to keep up with the pace set by Riley as they ducked into shops and restaurants, checking bathrooms and fitting rooms as they went. Riley wanted to cover as much ground as possible in the one hour timeframe given, which Jisung was appreciative of. However, Jisung hoped Minho and Chan were having better luck, or anyone else for that matter.

He wanted to find you more than anything. Knowing he had you in his arms was enough for him to get addicted to you, and if he stopped for a moment and focused on his memories, he was sure you were already fitting yourself into almost every single one..

Every one sided conversation suddenly being completed, all those nights spent with an unnecessary space between himself and Minho being filled by you. Your presence for those four minutes he got with you had already led to a downward spiral of need to be close to you, to hold you in his arms once more.

In combination with the presence of you in old memories, as if you’d always been there, there was also a small onslaught of new memories, ones without Minho but including you. Ones that further solidified your rightful place within his life.

As another memory flashed behind his eyes, he took a seat on a bench outside of a small corner store.

“Are you okay?” Riley asked, always a mother hen.

“I’m fine, just, check this one without me, I need a moment.”

Riley seemed to understand and didn’t ask questions as they pat him on the back and wandered into the store.

“Do you believe in soulmates?” A voice whispered in your ear as hands made their way around your waist. “Because I feel like we’ve met before and I’d like to get to know you again.”

You could smell the stench of alcohol emanating off the stranger feeling you up in the middle of the dance floor. Rolling your eyes, you ripped his hands off you, turning around and shoving him back for safe measure. 

“I do believe in soulmates, and you sure as hell ain’t mine. But the guy who is doesn’t really take kindly to strangers touching what's his.” 

Before the idiot could open his mouth again, Jisungs arm slid into place across your shoulders, pulling you in for a downright make out session right in the middle of the bars dance floor.

When he finally pulled away, the dude was nowhere to be seen.

“Took you long enough.” You said teasingly.

“Sorry to keep you waiting.” He smiled gently, and then led you to the booth he’d been watching you from.

You shook your head as you splashed water on your face in the bathroom, your best friend, Lia, pacing behind you.

“I thought you wanted to avoid them?”

Lia was the only person you’d confided in after coming to terms with the fact that your soulmates were not one, but two international superstars.

“I did, but, I don’t know. It was like being like that with them was so natural I didn’t even register that we don’t know each other. It felt right.”

“Do you think they know?”

Sighing, you lightly tapped your head against the wall, eyes squeezed shut. “I don’t know. If they don’t yet, we’ve met now, it’s only a matter of time before I start filtering into their memories.”

“Do you want to keep hiding from them? Y/n/n, they know now, there’s no avoiding them not remembering you anymore. Don’t you think avoiding them now will just cause unnecessary pain?”

“I know that! I do. But, I’m not sure I could handle being in their world, and what if they end up resenting me for ruining the good thing they already had? They’ve been together for so long, and then I just blindside them with my existence? What if they didn’t even know they had a third soulmate?”

“Then they do now and they’re probably looking everywhere for them. Those two don’t seem like the type to resent you for coming into their lives, but they might if you enter it just to disappear forever. I get the feeling now that they know, they’ll never stop looking for you. Do you understand that?”

You opened your mouth to answer when the door to the bathroom swung open.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt. I was just looking for someone.” The stranger looked flushed, as if they’d been running, but even so you could tell they were stunning. “Um, neither of you happen to know the song All In, do you?”

You and Lia shot each other confused but nervous looks, which seemed to be enough for this stranger who finally let the bathroom door shut behind them, leaning against it and eyeing you both.

“So which one of you is the runner?”

“What do you mean?”

“One of you just met your two soulmates and then booked it while they had their backs turned, which was it?”

Lia threw her hands up in defense, pointing at you in the process and backing up.

“Traitor.” You mumbled, causing her to stifle a laugh.

The stranger blocking the exit landed their gaze on you, “I ran too.”

Of all the things you were expecting them to say, that was definitely not on the list of possibilities.

“It’s scary,” They continued, pushing off the door and walking towards you. “But the separation is worse. I promise you, it’s better than you can possibly imagine. The company takes good care of us, and while we aren’t allowed to be public, we go pretty much everywhere with the boys if we want to. They don’t do anything to risk our relationships.”

“I’m sorry but, who are you and what do you mean by our?”

“Oh! I’m Riley, I’m Chan’s soulmate. And Changbin found his as well, their name is Bee. I went through the running and being scared of falling for someone in the industry but Bee was already in the industry themself when they found Bin, so it was slightly easier for them. Sorry, I’m rambling, but my point is we’re both here for you and we both understand how you’re feeling. And that those men you just left in the dust are two of the best I’ve ever met, and they’ve been looking for you for a long time.”

That comment shocked you to your core. 

They’ve been looking for you.

“How could they be looking for me, they couldn’t have even known about me.”

Riley seemed to hesitate. “To be honest, none of us believed them. For a while we really just assumed that they found each other at such a young age they’ve never experienced anything but one another, so the whole third soulmate thing was just sort of a way to come to terms with the fact that they wanted a change of pace or something. But, here you are, and we stand corrected. 

“They may not have known you, or known how to find you, but they’ve been searching for their ‘missing piece’ about as long as I’ve known them.” Then Riley quirked their head in a very parental like motion. “You already knew, didn’t you.”

It was phrased as a question, but was completely an irrefutable statement.

“How long have you known?” Where you were expecting harshness or judgment, you received only the sound of sheer curiosity.

“Almost a year now.” You mumbled, arms wrapping around yourself for a sense of security. 

Riley blanched. “A YEAR?!”

You just nodded. 

“Damn hun, I would’ve lost my mind if I’d known who Chris was for a whole year. How the hell did you manage that?!”

“By convincing themself that Minho and Han were already happy and better off without them, that they’d just throw a hitch in their lives that they didn’t need.” Lia stated, you could practically hear her rolling her eyes at you. Riley’s eyes softened at her words.

Grabbing your hands in one hand, Riley brushed a stray piece of hair out of your face, gently cupping your cheek. “I know exactly how you feel. When I found Chris, I ran too. I didn’t think I could survive his work schedule, the expectations placed on him, all the fans claiming him, but he is so worth every single difficulty and so much more. I know you’re scared right now, and it’s probably worse for you because it’s just Chris and me, but Min and Ji already adore you, they could never be happier without you than they will be with you, I can promise you that much.

“I understand if you’re not ready yet. I wasn’t ready for a long time myself, so if it’s okay with you, I want to give you mine and Bee’s numbers, you can reach out to us with any and all questions, concerns, whatever. Heck, if you just want to use them to get to know us, that’s fine too. I didn’t have anyone to help me, but you have us, we’ll help you all the way. Think about it, okay? All three of you will be so much happier together. You aren’t meant to be apart.”

You felt tears stinging your eyes again. You knew Riley was right, you’d always known you’d be happier with them, but you also knew there was no way for you to get their attention, no way for them to actually find you, now that you had, now that they knew you, you were truly out of logical reasons to avoid taking your place by their sides.

Because soulmates are a curious thing. Everyone has them, and someway, somehow, they always find each other.

a/n: ahhhhhh part two, I feel like it’s been done for a while but I’ve been like nervous about it idk, anyways I hope you enjoyed!! I know it’ll run for at least two more parts with potential for spin off(s) on the others finding their soulmates or even ‘prequels’ of Riley and Chan as well as Bee and Changbin🫣🤭 please feel free and encouraged to leave your thoughts and opinions and also lemme know if you’d be interested in being tagged in upcoming parts? ciao!! 🫶

me and @astraysimp are excited to announce our first collab!! 🥳🩷 as the name implies, it will be a small novel of dad!stray kids fics - 16 chapters in total, 8 smut and 8 fluff. whether unplanned or not, they realize they love their new roles as dads and we're overall really excited to merge our two ends of the spectrum-fluff and smut. this is really exciting for us and we hope you’ll enjoy our works 🫶🏻

♡

han

changbin

chan

hyunjin

lee know

seungmin

felix

i.n.

♡

this is the order in which we’ll be posting our fics. the taglist is currently open, comment or dm us to be added!

🏷️: @mellhwang ; @autumn583 ; @hyunsvngs ; @hotchnrz ; @galamxy ; @ebbaskz ; @turtledove824 ; @galaxycatdrawz ; @fawnpeaks ; @bigsobs4skz ; @143lix ; @bangchans-babygirl ; @aaasia111 ; @reid-deiri ;♡

-> reblog to show us your support! “it’s good for motivation” a man named chris bang once said.

also, make sure to follow @astraysimp bc her fics are soooo good and they always make me tear up (always happy tears)!! 🩷