"The Problem With Defending The Purity Of The English Language Is That English Is About As Pure As A

"The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary."

- James Nicoll

English Is Essentially __________.

“English is essentially Norse as spoken by a gang of French thugs.”—Benct Philip Jonsson

“English is essentially a language that uses vowels no other language would accept.”—Luís Henrique

“English is what you get from Normans trying to pick up Saxon girls.”—Bryan Maloney

“English is essentially a French menu stuttered by a fish-and-chips dealer.”—Kala Tunu

“English is essentially the works of Joyce with the hard bits taken out.”—Jon Hanna

“English is essentially all exceptions and no rules.”—Jonathan Bettencourt

—A selection of “Essentialist Explanations.” Thanks to the Penguin Press for pointing out this gem.

Melodramatic people seldom make good traveling partners

While traveling near Machu Picchu, 

He dabbed at his tears with a tissue.

He said "Life is pain."

I replied with distain,

"You wouldn't know joy if it bit you."

A breif history on the development of socialist communities within the democratic state of Israel

Before presenting the limerick, some background knowledge might be necessary:

Chalutz or Halutz - Hebrew: חָלוּץ‎‎, pl. halutzim), Hebrew for a pioneer. It may refer to early Jewish immigrants to Palestine, including Hovevei Zion and Bilu during the First Aliyah, which generally pre-date the founding of Zionism. 

Source: Wikipedia

Kibbutz -  noun, plural kib·but·zim [-boot-seem] 

(in Israel) a community settlement, usually agricultural,organized under collectivist principles*.

Source: Dictionary.com

* collectivist principles, meaning (basically) that everything was shared by all the kibbutz members. This ranged from the profit made by their crops, to dish duty, to living quarters, and even to child-rearing. As interesting as this may sound in theory, it was much more difficult in practice, and most current kibbutzim have become less strict about sharing absolutely everything, while remaining true to the original ideals.

~

With that in mind, please proceed to the following poem (all that buildup is going to kill the limerick, so for my sake, please set your expectations to "low and terrible")

~

Back in the day a Chalutz Decided to join a Kibbutz. He was unaware Among what they share Was a rash that they passed knockin' boots.

~

Also, in case I haven't already explained this limerick to death, "knocking boots" is a euphemism for sex. Apparently this is not common knowledge. 

Daleks are attacking street art!!!

Finding these made my day.

The framed, Park City, Utah, Banksy