she /her, bisexual, Fandom Old
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Vinelupul - If It Weren't For My Wolf - Tumblr Blog
Neil Gaiman Allegations final thoughts: trigger warning for this entire thing/SA but there are no graphic descriptions here.
Thank you to those of you who found my writeup of the podcast to be fair and unbiased. I hope these final thoughts will live up to that. This will be my final engagement with the situation
Regarding Neil Gaiman:
Neil Gaiman is not innocent. This is not a smear campaign. However the circumstances are so much more complex and nuanced than they appeared in the article. The headlines and article were misleading. At best, he is an irresponsible BDSM partner who did not create a safe environment for these women, exploited his position of power/fame over them, and has at least two specific credible allegations of SA. At worse? Well, it's not good.
Did this rise to a criminal/prosecutable level? No. The police refused to take up the victims complaint due to lack of evidence and text messages of consent she sent. We can never know if it was true or false consent (and that obviously doesn't cover every circumstance), but there were messages of consent.
The fact of the matter is, yes he's a creep. He messed up. He made bad choices. Is he a monster? No. Is he a good person? Also no. He's just a man that we don't know, who made some terrible decisions and hurt people in his personal life. Beware of posts that will tell you he is either a irredeemable monster or completely innocent.
Regarding the Victims:
There is no such thing as a perfect victim and this is crucial in this case. These are two women who now feel traumatized by their relationship with Neil, and make no mistake, they are victims here. There is one undisputable instance of SA with K, and Scarlett's first encounter with Neil (assuming Scarlett's version is truth) was also SA. There is no getting around this fact. While age gaps are not inherently bad, these two, coupled with Neil's fame, created an environment that was harmful to them.
However, it is not true that they had no agency in this. They did make decisions, however understandable, that create a case that is complex and unclear. There are multiple times where they knowingly lied about consent during acts they did not actually want, and both verbalized it in writing and in their own words on the podcast. This does not negate their trauma about these events, and this not mean the consent in those moments was freely or unproblematically given, nor does it imply blanket consent. But in the end, consent was given at the time for some acts they now regret, and no concerns were voiced to Neil directly until after their relationships ended. (This is a separate point from the two specific SA allegations)
We do not need to blame them, condemn them, or dismiss them. But we also don't need to purify them and ignore the responsibility they had in how some of the situations played out. (Some not all)
Beware of people calling their allegations false because of revenge, as a political plot against Neil, or fame. And beware of people refusing to look critically at this at all. These are complex, hurt, scared women. I feel so deeply for them and understand their regret and pain on a personal level. But in my case, my hands weren't completely clean either, and it's not victim/self blaming to discuss this aspect.
Regarding Tortoise Media
It is important to discuss that this was reported on by a conservative publication with ties to TERF activists. This is an undisputable fact and does play into how this entire situation has been shaped.
Their political bias absolutely impacted the way this story was told, presented, and investigated. This is not a fully credible source. There are multiple times they refuse to ask follow up questions and leave things intentionally vague. They are not open about sources, haven't provided proof of any of their claims outside of the podcast, and consult extremely politically biased experts. I do not believe this story would have been run by another publication.
As I said in my write up post, the fact that they view BDSM as impossible to be consensual (and in their words criminal in the UK) has an impact when talking about a relationship that included BDSM. They view this aspect as inherently abusive no matter the context and it's part of their main allegation.
However you cannot use these facts to dismiss these allegations all together. Most of this was told by the victims themselves in their own words speaking on the podcast. The issues with the publication does not negate these allegations. It is another piece of the puzzle. Be critical of their presentation, as I absolutely believe they exploited and sensationalized this story, but that doesn't mean there is no truth at all to be found here. Be critical of ALL MEDIA
What's Next
Finally I'm asking that we all divorce ourselves from Neil the person. If or when he returns to tumblr, do not engage. Do not follow. Do not message him. Messages of support or fury will do nothing to help solve the problem, and we will be the ones hurt by it. I do not believe any of this negates his body of work, or the many other people that have a hand in his stories. We are not responsible for things that happen in his personal life. I would also advise against comparing this to JKR. They are completely different situations and the net of harm that JKR casts is vast. These are not comparable.
Please please stop viewing this case in extremes and remember there is so much we don't know. I'm sure there is so much more context that is both damning and redeeming that we will never know. We don't know these people and it is not our job to figure this out.
I love you all, my heart goes out to all the fellow survivors that have had to watch this unfold. Please take care of yourself during this moment. I did not expect my write up to go so far outside of my circle and I think I felt a bit of an unhealthy need to finish what I unintentionally started for myself. I'm begging everyone to remember that no situation is black and white. Everyone is flawed, everyone makes mistakes, everyone gets hurt, and everyone has hurt someone else. That is human.
I will no longer be answering any messages about this situation
scars in fiction: I got this trying to save my lover from an assassin- but tragically, I was too late. now I carry the mark of my failure with me always, and I can never forget~
scars in real life: so I was trying to open macaroni sauce with a paring knife
trying to describe black sails to people is my personal sisyphean task. “it’s a pirate show” bad. “it’s functionally a prequel to treasure island but also it’s not at all” bad again, and also confusing. “it’s about pirates trying to destroy western civilization” mostly only true of the second half of the show and also doesn’t fully capture what i love about it. “it’s a pirate show about the power of stories, how civilization uses shame to keep people in line and turns them into monsters, and the power of queer rage. it’s got some of the best acting, writing, everything of any show i’ve ever seen.” the most accurate, but way too long and makes me sound pretentious and insane. send help i just want to talk about my favorite show.
This post is a hate crime
"the early 2010s were better" no they weren't. "hey soul sister" was on the radio.
petition to bring back saying "huzzah!" when something goes your way and "alas." when it doesn't
I genuinely do not know who this straw leftist is who thinks Russia's invasion of Ukraine was okay but not Israel's attacks on Gaza. Like. What?
maybe i'm misunderstanding the concept, but it lately it's felt like Online Leftists™️ have been using homonationalism as a cudgel against lgbt people wanting to go abroad and feel comfortable doing so instead of as idk a way to critique american exceptionalism or whatever
The thing about Online Leftists and American exceptionalism in any capacity is that literally all their ideas and concepts of it are a) gibberish and b) completely contradictory and hypocritical. This is because it is all based on a reactionary Vibes ideology that has to constantly change itself to oppose whatever the Democrats/the US/the West in general is doing and therefore has no actual logical guidelines or consistent internal principles. To wit:
America is the most powerful country in the world, and that influence is always and forever totally evil because (insert terrible shit America has done here, which is then generalized and applied to all time periods and places without context or nuance). Indeed, America is so powerful that no other country or government in the world has actual agency or makes real choices for which they are morally and legally responsible; they're just helpless and manipulated pawns reacting to American/Western imperialism (which is the only kind of imperialism that exists, somehow). As such, nothing they ever do is actually "bad" or worthy of condemnation, because they're just totally victimized by America and everything they do is justified as long as it is anti-America. Hence, Russia genociding the Ukrainians is actually fine and good, the Ukrainians must have deserved it somehow (witness how many of the people currently screaming about Gaza were yelling that Ukraine was totally fine to attack actually!) and America is evil for trying to intervene. Russian propaganda calls America bad, we think America is bad, and therefore Russian propaganda must be correct, we love Russian propaganda a whole lot and have no interest in examining that fact any further. Russia is actually good because it used to be the USSR! Did you know that?
However, Israel genociding Gaza is utterly unforgivable and terrible and anyone who tries to offer any kind of realistic critique or appraisal of what can or can't be done to stop it is a genocide apologist. America should in fact be intervening to the point of invading Israel and/or dismantling the Israeli state, because maximalist American military intervention is Good when we say it is (but the rest of the time it's the most awful evil thing in the world WHY DON'T YOU CARE ABOUT THE GLOBAL SOUTH). America is still the most powerful country in the world and it should be intervening at all times, but actually it shouldn't do that at all because we're totally not the right-wing America First isolationists sent through the rabbit hole. If America does not choose to exercise its almighty godlike power to stop all the evil in the world (but remember, American military intervention of any kind is obviously bad and Ukraine should definitely still be genocided), it is just proving how evil it actually is. Remember, nobody else makes real choices. They're just reacting to America. America is all-powerful and also evil but still should use this evil power for good because it's good if we decide it is.
Voting is meaningless because the parties are the same, but it's powerful enough to produce a president god-king who could just decide to snap his fingers and end all bad things in the world but just doesn't do that (at least if he's a Democrat; we don't really care what a Republican president does). We think this is a good idea, but don't worry, America is still the source of all evil in the world. America should intervene everywhere and nowhere all at once. America should do nothing because everything it does is evil and past redemption and the only solution is The Revolution which destroys society. America is evil because it was founded on the violent oppression and exploitation of minorities, and therefore the solution is to let fascists be elected to punish those minorities even more because they get in the way of our purist thought experiments and their actual lived experiences don't matter when they contradict our Ideology. BUT ACTUALLY IT STILL SHOULD MILITARILY INTERVENE EVERYWHERE WE SAY SO BUT ACTUALLY IT SHOULDN'T EVER GLOBAL SOUTH. (We don't know what the Global South is or any of its issues, politics, problems, identities, languages, postcolonial developments or so forth, but we know that the Cold War happened and it was all America's fault. Have you heard this piece of Russian propaganda about how Joe Biden is the antichrist? SILENCE IS VIOLENCE SO YOU BETTER SHARE IT.)
Likewise, we support LGBTQ rights in theory but we don't think they're ever worth actually voting to protect (remember, voting is meaningless!) if that also contradicts our aim of The Revolution. We love virulently anti-gay groups like the Houthis if they theoretically support our Anti Genocide stance (don't look at Ukraine, that doesn't count) and also hate Jews. Israel is the only country in the world that has LGBTQ rights and also does stupid or awful military things, and therefore it alone is the problem because it's just pretending to be a democracy or have LGBTQ rights (in comparison to the rest of the Middle East) because it's just cynically covering for all its sins, but those sins are actually America, because Israel is just a white settler colonialist outpost of America, so America not stopping what Israel is doing (by being Israel) is bad. Remember, America is the source of all evil in the world and all other countries are its puppets, so it is also Israel, but it should stop being Israel, because it's the only country that ever makes any choices or has agency. We are very smart.
...basically, if your head hurt trying to read that or follow the logic, that's the point. It has to change constantly and contort itself around in order to both oppose those Weak Mainstream Liberals and act like it has the perfect moral high ground in doing so, regardless of what principles it has to change or what hypocrisies it has to embrace. As such, it has been stripped of any authentic critique or ability to say anything about anything, and I suggest we generally stop letting it pretend that it does. That is the only way to rescue western leftism and make it actually 2% of use at opposing fascism, because right now? Nah. Not in the least. It's actively and gleefully enabling fascism, and after so long hearing how us normie Democratic-voting losers were going to be the ones collaborating with fascists, it makes me just a little bit crazy. Good thing we can erase that too.
The law locks up the man or woman
Who steals the goose off the common
But leaves the greater villain loose
Who steals the common from the goose.
The law demands that we atone
When we take things we do not own
But leaves the lords and ladies fine
Who takes things that are yours and mine.
The poor and wretched don’t escape
If they conspire the law to break;
This must be so but they endure
Those who conspire to make the law.
The law locks up the man or woman
Who steals the goose from off the common
And geese will still a common lack
Till they go and steal it back.
Happy Threshold Day! I commemorated this iconic Voyager moment in stained glass.
My contribution to Threshold Day!
I wanted to make something with felt scraps I had from other projects, and not buy anything new. I’m pretty happy with how it turned out! All of the thread (except the orange) is satin so it’s nice and shimmery. I wish the purple showed up better in photos, though.
butch cassidy and the sundance kid was like paul newman and robert redford as an old married couple but the sting was like dilf paul newman and his boy toy robert redford despite being made like 5 or 6 years later (i don't remember im not looking it up) they made him younger for why? so in 2023 people on tumblr can call the age gap problematic. that's not true at all im posting from an alternate dimension where the sting is really big for some reason and everyone posts about it all the time
Important question if you write fanfiction about jury duty is it rpf or not
Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023) dir. John Francis Daley, Jonathan Goldstein
The Sting turns 50 and still qualifies for Yuletide
Without realizing it was exactly the fiftieth anniversary, we watched this last night. It holds up! This review explains its continued appeal, particularly to fans of m/m slash.