I Mostly Try And Stay Off Of Tumblr Too Much When I'm Age Regressed Cause I Never Know What I'll See

I mostly try and stay off of Tumblr too much when I'm age regressed cause I never know what I'll see cause not everything is tagged well and stuff.

However, I am on rn while regressed, lol. I wanna talk about memories [happier ones] to do with agere in my life as Zuki.

While I am very much in a partly regressed partly not most of the time in this life, I could fully regress most of the time in my life as Zuki.

When I was regressed, I liked to be called pup by a few people that I gave permission to. Dad and pa had permission as did Toshi and Zuku. Also Kari and Kats, lol.

Kats rarely called me pup though and it wasn't around others really, reputation or something like that, lol.

Being called pup always helped me with regressing as well, so it was pretty much just used when I was already regressed or wanting or needing to regress, lol.

Dad would be able to tell when I needed to regress even if I said I didn't want or need to, lol. He would usually call me pup when he noticed, and then I would regress almost instantly. Sometimes, I would say I wasn't little when I was regressed, lol.

Pa had a harder time seeing through my lies or whatever you wanna call them, lol. But was very great when I was regressed and he knew about it.

Zuku had an even easier time knowing this stuff than dad did cause he knew me longer and stuff. The first person to know about my regression and one of my favorites to go to.

Toshi, like pa, had a hard time knowing this stuff. But was amazing when he took care of me when I was little.

Kari knew almost as much as Zuku, lol. Kari also regressed sometimes [as did Zuku and Toshi and some others], so that helped. They were one of the ones I loved being around best while regressed, but all the ones mentioned are the best ones I loved being around, lol.

Kats knew a little less than Zuku but about the same as dad. He was also cool to be around while I was little, although you probably wouldn't guess that, lol.

This is all I'm gonna mention rn, so yeah.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/xe) :3c

3rd & 4th poems to post. Posting these together cause they are related.

Tw/cw: violence(?), tearing skin, and bone mention.

Bare my Teeth and Tear 'my' Skin & Bare my Claws and Tear 'my' Skin

I want to bare my teeth

And tear at 'my' skin

Until all that's left

Is the bone underneath

For the bone will be

More right than the skin

Despite it still

Being wrong

But I cannot

For this body's

Teeth are not sharp

Enough to tear the skin

So I bare my teeth

At the image in the mirror

For it is wrong

It is not right

-------------------------------------------------------

I want to bare my claws

And tear at 'my' skin

Until all that's left

Is the bone underneath

For the bone will be

More right than the skin

Despite it still

Being wrong

But I cannot

For this body's

'Nails' are not sharp

Enough to tear the skin

So I bare my claws

At the image in the mirror

For it is wrong

It is not right

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it)

5th poem to post. Another dog & wolf related poem, lol. A lot of my poems are canine related cause of me being a canine kin [specifically wolfdog kin].

Tw/cw: biting mention, abuse hinted at(?), and I think that's all. Let me know if you find any tw/cw I didn't add that I need to.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/xe) [trying something new with my sign off thing on my poem posts]

Roll Over/Growl

I think that

I should roll over

And whine sorry

Over and over again

But instead I growl

I bare my teeth

And snap at you

I bite and growl

I should roll over

I should say sorry

I should be a good dog

A good wolf

But I'm not

I growl and bite

I'm a bad dog

A bad wolf

I should roll over

I growl and snap

I should whine sorry

I bare my teeth and bite

I'm sorry I'm not good

I bite even when

You try to help me

For I'm scared

I'm sorry I'm bad

I growl even when

You're kind for I don't

Know when you'll stop

Thanks for the help! I'll check out that website when I get the chance!

I know I have trauma that really affected me, I just have a hard time with knowing how much and shit.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx)

Random, but can any systems/plural beings talk about how they figured out that they are plural?

DID, OSDD, endo, etc. Any version of systems or plurals

I have questioned DID or something similar to just myself and 1 or 2 friends irl before. I'm unsure if my trauma was "enough" or happened at "the right time" or whatever to be able to cause a dissociative disorder.

If anyone has any websites or similar things to suggest to help me, pls send me them.

I mostly try and stay out of plural/system things cause once again I am unsure if I am one in any way. And to go into a community that I am not sure I am in feels off.

Using I/me/my/etc. sometimes feels wrong, and we/us/our/etc. feel right even if just referring to "me." But sometimes I/me/my/etc. feels fine/right, so idk.

Please give me advice or at least share your experiences if you're able/willing to. Thanks

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx) [if I find out I'm a system/plural in some way, this sign off thing will probably be changed around].

First poem to post, lol.

No tw or cw I can think of.

This poem is very dog related.

The formatting is different on here than it was on my notes app, so it might seem weird. Although it might have seemed weird anyway, lol.

You Taught Me/Bad Dog

You taught me to fight

Yet when I fight

You label me a

Bad dog

You taught me to bite

But when I bite

You call me a

Bad dog

You taught me to growl

Yet when I growl

You say I'm a

Bad dog

You taught me this

But when I listen

You declare me a

Bad dog

You taught me

Yet I listen and

You insist I'm a

Bad dog

You taught me

How to be a

Bad dog

Anyone wanna howl with me rn?

I wish I did yesterday when the full moon was out where I am. But alas, I didn't, so I will howl tonight.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/xe)