Bucky X Y/n - Tumblr Posts - Page 2

————-Maybe————

Description

You work alongside Matt and Foggy at the law firm. Of course, as one of the most successful lawyers in the city the one and only Tony Stark would recruit you. As you are trying to find a meaning of your life you find life in someone. It may be a rocky start for you two but maybe it’s worth taking.

Chapter 9:

I don’t know what time I fell asleep yesterday. With all the cries and the temperature not going down I panicked and maybe knocked myself out after her cries had stopped. Wait. Where is she? I ran out of my room and out to the main floor. “Hey. Don’t freak out she is in Bruce's lab” Why? I rush over just to come to a stop right at the door. I looked over and the clock said 10. In the morning? What the hell.

“Having a kid is like being hung over sometimes. You don’t remember something when things were rough with them the night before” Clint's words made me feel a little better. I should have stayed up and with her the whole night.

“You stayed with her the whole night” I hear Wanda’s voice beside me. “Her temperature was going down and she fell asleep. An hour or so later she started throwing up” Yeah I can remember that. That was the first time in a long time that I had frozen. After the shock and as soon as Lydia stopped throwing up I went to find Bruce. With another few throw ups and the fever coming back up Bruce told me she had an ear infection. The medicine was prescriped but I couldn't pick it up until this morning. So all last night she was awake and crying. And if she wasn’t crying she was throwin up and right after throwing up she was crying again. She didn’t even want to take her bottle. “You knocked out around 4 in the morning after she was asleep. Bucky took you to lay down”

“Has she taken her medicine?” Wanda nods. I haven’t spoken to Bucky since that night I went to apologise. Havent seen him since either. We spoke for a couple minutes before Wanda knocked on the door and said she needed to leave.

“He stayed with her since you left. The only time he left her side was when he left to pick up her medicine” Now she was feeling better. She was in Bucky’s arms eating some bananas.

“Don’t beat yourself about it. It's not like there is a rule book on how to take care of a baby. Trust me if there was one I would have been their number one fan” We laugh at Clint. “I know her grandparents are on their way but have you ever thought about keeping her?” honestly no. Lydia is a wonderful baby and I distance myself from her but I would be lying if I said she wasn’t the reason I didn’t feel alone. I only spent a full day with her and another couple but during that time she has put me in situations I felt I needed at the time.

“No. Who knows what will happen. I take the long run on this one” I open the glass door and walk towards the two. “Hey” I kneel down in-front of them as Lydia takes notice she reaches her arms out to me but Bucky hold her back

“Yeah no. It's your turn to take a shower” I moved my eyes to where he was looking and my shirt and pants had dried throw up on it. I can’t stand the smell of cheese but I could sleep through throw up being all over me?

“Fine” I roll my eyes walking out the door. “Were yall going to tell me I have throw up all over me?” I say to Clint and Wanda who were now in the kitchen island eating something. They both shake their heads laughing. I make my way over to take a shower. Took a quick 10 minute shower but I would be lying to you if I didn’t feel disgusted at the thought of smelling like throw up. I probably still smelled like it. I changed and once I walked out the door I was surprised to see the sight in front of me.

“She fell asleep right after her bottle” Lydia was fast asleep surrounded by pillows while Bucky stood at the end of the bed

“Thank you” I didn’t know what to say. So I just turned around and started packing her bag so as soon as she woke we could leave.

“Are you going to keep her?” Why does he care? Maybe he was just trying to make conversation to not make it weird and maybe I am an asshole for thinking this but he doesn’t have to be here anymore.

“I am not planning to” It’s as simple as that.

“What if the plan changes?”

“Then I guess I will deal with it then” I shrug really wanting the conversation to be over. But now that the awkward silence has me reconsidering it.

“So about that night” Fuck. Now I really want to go back to the other conversation. “I never meant to put that pressure on you. I was angry, full of rage and that was wrong on my part”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Wanda was right, you don’t accept apologies.” That made my head turn. “She said you don’t accept gratefulness or apologies. There are rare occasions when you use your manners too” oh fuck you. “And when you do, you don’t mean it”

“You got a Y/N 101 from Wanda?” I wasn’t pissed but I wasn’t happy eithier. I don’t mind people having their ideas of me, good or bad I don’t care. But when someone comes up to me and tells me in my face how I am I tend to get defensive.

“Yes. I needed to know if you were truly sorry about your apology” This asshole. “Wanda said if you apologise for something you were truly sincere” calm down. I close my eyes not wanting to do anything out of anger. How dare he go and try to find out if I was truly honest? He should have taken it up with himself to believe me or not.

“Okay” I didn’t want to start an argument with the guy.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure Tinman”

“Do you want to go on a date?”

“With you?” oh shit “I didn’t mean it that way” Fuck you. I saw him walk towards me and my body froze. My eyes are looking for an escape but I can’t come up with one.

“I haven’t been on a date in a long time, if I am being honest I am still learning about my feelings and how to deal with them” He grabs both my hands in his eyes and can’t seem to peel at the sight of it.

“Is this a new therapy thing she has you doing?” I hear a slight chuckle but he shakes his head.

“She mentioned going out with friends and before you say anything, no. When I first saw you I felt a gravitational pull towards you, and call me crazy but that was enough for me to know that in my mind we could be something other than friends” Best friends? Super friends! Get it? Because he is a super soldier? “I didn’t know how to come to you at first but if I don’t give it a try now than I might never get to it”

“Even after I caused you pain? Made you angry and tried to sabotage your orders?” I am not going to deny it made me blush. I thought after everything he would not hate me but dislike me that after the whole protecting me was over he would not even give me a second glance.

“I am willing to give it a try after all of that” that is stupid. How does he know I won’t do it again? “You had your motive behind them and I hope after getting to know eachother things will be alright.” I look up to meet his eyes. Oh honey you don’t know anything. My mind is telling me to remove my hands from his hold. Look away from his eyes. Make my heart steady to his touch. I am not one to do this with. I am no good. I will only break his and my own heart at the end. I am unstable. Maybe that is why I felt that connection with him in the first place. God knows I don’t know how to deal with my feelings either.

“Will I be responsible if things go wrong?” I was giving him a chance to run. Take back his words and hopefully only depart on a happy note. But my heart wants more. Maybe I should be brave enough like him. “I can’t promise you anything.”

“I am not asking you to promise me anything. I am just taking a risk at this” a risk. A risk is taken when you are doing something unsure, dangerous, unplanned, a ticking time bomb, like me.

“Ok”

A/N: why’s have I never seen this?!!!. So adorable.

Anyways I feel like this story is coming to an end. I don’t know if chapter ten will be the last or maybe it will be a couple more chapters but am stuck. Have no idea where to go. Maybe the story will end and I will post some chapters of the future as not part of the story like, if they get married or kids, i dont know.

A dreamless slumber [Bucky Barnes X GN Reader]

Summary : Bucky is suffering so much and craves for some relief

Warnings : None. Just a bit of fluff, self-hatred, fears, tears, despair and my awful English(sorry)

Words : 11k

A/N : Can we just talk about how Sebastian Stan is handsome, talented and absolutely charming? Because we are never giving half of the justice he deserves. And Happy Birthday to him, by the way. 

Everything was dark. A house. A garden. Some faded roses. An empty swimming pool full of dead leaves, sweeped by the cold wind, and a lonely chair resting here. Yet, it was a sunny day over the house. The pale light was giving a dull aspect of the elegant building which was now decaying slowly, just like nature when autumn was coming.

It was such a grim landscape. Sadness was heavy like a stifling gas in a room. Choking everything. Bucky was getting deeper and deeper into the house which has almost the size of a small but noble mansion. The living room had a white-marbled massive fireplace. Ages ago, it would have been the best place to be when a delicate snowy coat would have covered the ground and the fir trees of the garden. The glints of fire were almost visible and several fake memories of happiness hidden behind a delusional smile and a faceless silhouette embracing Bucky were appearing on front of his eyes . Dreamy, he went almost despaired when he blinked and the image vanished.

It was a happy illusion, contrasting with the gloom hanging in the room. His vision range went blurry, disturbed. Slightly, piece by piece, the living room fragmented, falling apart. Until he reached a full blackness. Bucky was feeling himself heavier while he was waiting for what's going to happen. The black-haired murderer couldn't move. Not even his metal arm. Which was making him a little bit afraid. He knew he was stuck in his brain, far from reality, and unable to have some control over it. It was this kind of lucid dreams he hated so much because it would remind him awful memories of his moves, his actions he preferred either forgotten or atoned. Although, the last option wasn't truly a possibility, considering who he was.

He reminded the scientist with glasses. Then, the other one who slapped him for a report after remembering who was Steve. All the faces and names were merging, echoing through his skull like a headache way more powerful than the usual, mixing memories all more painful than the former one. He was feeling physically the pain when they put his mind in a blender, making him a monster. Electricity coming along his muscles, the stength he used but the inefficiency of all of it while he was held back in his chair. A mental whiplash crushing his memories as if a whole contingent of soldiers armed to the teeth was marching over him, the rhythmic step hammering and crushing his bones. And death. Coldness of the Grim Reaper's scythe going down along his spine and in his veins while he was standing as a tool of the human beings' insanity and ambition.

The light illusion went in front of him as he thought having shut his eyelids. The reassuring flames of an unknown but somehow familiar setting full of gentleness and love on the couch in front of the fireplace mixing with the ghostly stir in Bucky's body was giving him one of the worst and most cruel nightmares he has ever had. A contrasting fire was blossoming in his chest, as if his insides were torn apart by his anger and uneasiness. He wanted to die. He demanded all of this stop definitely while he was almost doomed to live for an atonement when everyone wished he was dead. He would call someone to end up everything right now. He hated himself as much as he could and even more. This burning anger was causing him a headache among other things. Bucky was longing for relief, craving for embrace, affection, love– something which could let him having an opportunity to change. Obviously, he wouldn't get anything. A monster never truly stops to be a monster.

Although, during a little second, only one, in the darkness of his deepest imagination, a whisper went through the thick mist clouding his mind. Bucky found himself gazing towards the place where the soft voice was echoing. He didn't find the location, his thoughts were noisy and the image blurred during a little time. Like the flat surface of a lake disturbed by the silent roars of some dreadful deep-sea creatures. "You have to wake up" was all the calm, cristal-like voice, said as if a fairy was playing with his nerves. Several balls of fire appeared in the darkness of this endless ocean of pain. Tender imaginary moments, warmth of a home, of a friend, of an illusional lover standing in a doorframe with nothing but a smile on the only visible lips. All that formed the shape of a happiness that Bucky wasn't worthy of. The fireflies, so small at first, got bigger and bigger. So much that the black-haired man felt almost overwhelmed by so much warmth. He let his fingertips being slowly tainted by this welcomed light. Some tears escaped from Bucky who sensed his heart getting lighter and lighter as time went on. Along his skin, the welcoming and soothing heat passed through his bones, his muscles and even his metal arm became flesh. As if the soldier nevel fell down from the train.

He was feeling so good. That night terror was so cruel. Bucky craved for all of it and he knew very well he was chained to his own monstrosity. His heart was corrupted by a helpless hope which would never come true. Those repeating thoughts were digging a deeper hallow in the man's heart. He felt the salted bitter taste of his tears on his lips and his tongue.

Suddenly, something changed. Sharp as a blade cutting his skin, cold as water on his skin when diving, freezing air grasped his senses when his eyes widened in the darkness of the room where the black-haired man was sleeping in. He sat up on the mattress, sweating, seeking the truth in the half-dark landscape in front of him. His erratic breath lasted a long time before it finally calmed down. Bucky's ribcage was aching, eager to find air. And finally, the gasps ended. He toughly got back from the unconscious realm of imagination and deepest feelings.

The man was shaking, shuddering. In the end, his limits reached their furthest extremity. The delightful taste of peace broke everything. A sigh later, Bucky grasped the blankets and laid down on the bed, covering himself. Tears were still flowing down along his cheeks while he just watched vaguely at the ceiling.

The sun rised over the Avengers' headquarters. Muscles strangely aching and sore from his night, Bucky didn't feel the mood to get up. Though, he knew better than staying like a lost puppy under his blankets. He had to get up and have some practice in case he had to fight. He put some comfortable clothes. His shirt was leaving little to imagination about his metal arm and the strength the prosthesis possessed. He went straight to the training room. Silent was the master in the buildings. They all were sleeping. Eventually, Steve would join and both men could practice efficiently before breakfast. Around 5am, some might get up.

Although, Bucky wasn't expecting you, of all the people, to be awake so early in the morning. You were giving some punches to the training dummy while some music was echoing through the room. Your rhythm to beat the dummy fitted the beat of the song. You weren't conscious about the man's presence, due to your entire focus on the target of your kicks.

Suddenly, the song changed and you found yourself decreasing your pace against the poor dummy. The silence and low beating added to the singer's tone made you consider the fact that you might not be alone anymore. After a final hit on the punching bag you gazed at the trespasser in front of you.

"Hey" you greeted softly while you were stepping towards the source of music.

You switched off the device.

"Morning" was all Bucky said.

Your eyes were following the man's silhouette.

The situation was awkward. You didn't know what to say. Bucky wasn't really a talkative person but you should come up with something. Anything. Yet, you failed. You had the possibility to start with music but the man was stuck in 40's, you hadn't any knowledge about the tastes of the people from this decades. Or you also could've asked about how he was going. You had no idea on what to do.

"Why do you stare at me like that?" Bucky questioned quite brutally.

"I was wondering why you came here. You are usually not here so early" you improvised quickly.

The man surprised you. His tone was sharp like a blade and even though you didn't know each other pretty well, it doesn't prevent that you remained cordial. He killed Tony's parents after all. He doesn't have any right to speak this way to an Avenger.

"I've had a bad night" Bucky mumbled at a very low volume.

Your gaze softened a little. Yet, you had no idea on what you should say. You know how it felt, and you didn't manage to sleep well last night either. Something troubled you and you had to handle it with your powers. That was so annoying. The identification of your target came too late and someone somewhere must have felt a sudden relaxing during a particularly resonating nightmare. You weren't able to even say who could've receive all these soothing waves of powers you sent via your own imagination. That was all a thing but developing your story background was pointless. You were a threat only leashed by your agreement done with Tony Stark years ago when you corrupt most of the Avengers' mind and almost destroyed them. You found a comfortable nest in the tower, then the compound. Everything fine since this moment. And your favorite sparring partner was undoubtedly Wanda, mostly because of the similarities lying in your powers. After all, it is always easier to get along with the same kind of monstrosity as your own. The sole difference between you was the fact that she accepted herself a bit easier than you. But all this was only detail.

The Winter Soldier embodied by Bucky was now turning towards a punching bag next to your own. He slightly pulled up his arm and put himself on the position of beating the target in front of him. He only made a swift movement. The strength he had set into his arm bursted out the metal chain which was keeping the inanimated training device hanging in the air.

You stared at the poor object lying, completely demolished, next to the impact he created in the wall.

"Poor thing" you commented, feeling sincerely sorry for the bag which never asked for such a punch.

You turned your back to Bucky and carried on the little fight that you had before the man's arrival. You sensed his gaze upon you more than once but couldn't have cared less. You were too busy and deaf thank to the headphones you were now wearing. A little less than a hour later, you left the training room and headed toward your shower. Once it has been done, you went in the kitchen and started to prepare some breakfast. You planned to go outside this day, with Tony's agreement. It was sad but it was also the rule. You remain a monster for most. But this is it. There's nothing to discuss, as displeasing as it sounds.

The faces of your 'roommates' started to appear some short minutes after you went in the kitchen. Clint came to help you. He couldn't prevent himself to make some jokes about how you used your telekinesis as one of the most useful tool ever. Even the deadly, black, scary hands coming from out of nowhere were an amazing help for any sort of tasks. Even though they were quite dread.

Steve, Natasha, Sam, Tony... All of the people came one by one. That was quite funny to see their sleepy faces. You took a very quick breakfast, hardly an apple or whatever, and headed down the compound.

"Why is Y/N such in a hurry?" asked Steve when he noticed your disappearance at lightning speed.

"They got the necessary approval to go outside today. With, of course, being constantly tracked and everything clear about what they do and the places they go." Tony replied with an empty tone, he didn't like these creepy decisions about you.

The latter didn't want you to live in a prison. And yet, this is what he had to do. At this, point, keeping you in a lost hole would have been more legitimate. You weren't causing enough harm to be submitted to the chains of the worst cages ever constructed it seems.

"Natasha will have to keep an eye on them." the genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist completed.

"It sounds that you have to worry a little then. Because there's no more signal." Clint countered when he checked over Natasha's shoulder on the screen the plan of the cities around and your supposed geographical position.

Your powers granted you to cover a vast field when you used them to fly, as Wanda could have done. You had the silhouette of a huge bird, maybe like a condor, or even bigger. Your so-called wings were made of your orange energy, mixed to a 'spell' allowing you to overfly the grim world you existed in. Once you get down on earth, hidden in a dirty alley between uneven and crumbling buildings in the dangerous and somehow most remote places of New York City, you just went here and there. Your main idea was to enjoy life as you would have done if you weren't kept jailed in the compound because of these stupid powers of yours. All of this was delightful. A bitter taste suddenly invaded your mouth and your whole being while you figured out how it would have been without taking your fair part in the Avengers' stuff.

You joined the biggest shopping malls very easily and quickly. And you felt so free here. Surrounded by the noisy streets of NYC that a lot of people judged unsufferable. It was definitely not your opinion. Silence was sometimes even more traumatic and breaking than any scream. And it was a grey day today, matching with the sky's desire to let drop the rain, as a sort of release of pressure. You loved the hues of the clouds today. You didn't care about the rain.

Midday came sadly too soon. Plus, strangely, the tracker you crushed between your fingers even before having left the compound didn't result in a panic coming from Tony who wouldn't know where you were. Not that seeing the powerful and very composed Iron Man completely out of control because of such a small detail wouldn't be funny as hell. You enjoyed your afternoon while listening to a street musician. He was playing saxophone. The gentle and entertaining tone of the instrument made you release some waves of your power, influencing people's minds and unconsciously getting them to dance with more or less talent in the street as if it was the most normal thing ever.

You ended your day by wandering through Central Park accompanied with those grey squirrels way too much friendly for your taste. You didn't want to get back to the Avergers' headquarters. It was too soon. Your day of freedom was already over and you couldn't stand it. That was beyond yourself. Returning in this endless custody was too hard, freedom had such a sweet and addictive taste.

The night started to fell down, slowly. Your time was really over. You found a bench while you were still wandering around Central Park. The Avenue, you didn't know which one and you had no care about this detail, had calmed down. It was more silent, even though cars were still present and their headlights were now shining through the settling darkness. Beautiful black and deep blue clouds, epitomizing the God's anger, were gathering again. More menacing this time. You enjoyed the moment when the glass broke somehow, when a twisted lightning bolt would make the shape of an arc across the New York covered sky. You sheltered yourself under an umbrella of compressed air where the rain slipped through. You liked the song, like some fairies' laugh. So comfortable. You could have cried.

Yet, you found yourself torn from the illusion. It was so beautiful. But the responsible for this wasn't so worthy of scorn. A little ball of fur lingered under your legs, a safe place apparently. A cute little puppy was giving you a sad look while shaking due to the sudden invading coldness. You took the little animal between your hands. You were only able to see him thank to a lamp post pegged next to that very bench. Even with a visible fear, the puppy left you take him against your chest. Whether it was a cat, the little animal would have loudly purred. You could feel the high contentment of the little dog. He was so sweet, so cute and sheltered in an energy bubble, not outside in the tempest and under the danger of flying branch due to strong winds.

You take a lot of time petting the animal. You could tell he was happy, mostly because of his unceasing nuzzle in your arms. You were smiling. Then, you straightened up your posture. Cold and penetratring rain was now dropping. The yellow light of the lamp post lit a circle barely five meters large around you. Your shield was enough, yet you couldn't figure out about the person observing you. It may be Hydra. Or anyone else. Still, something dangerous was moving, protected by shadows. You carried on your petting over the puppy's head. He wasn't even moving an ear, deeply asleep as he was.

You unleashed an orange wave shaped as a circle. The trespasser dodged it. "Fine" you thought. You left the little puppy on the bench, protected under the energy bubble and went under the freezing drizzle.

"Come here if you dare. Coward." you provoked with a dry and careless tone.

Though, whether you would have been that foolish, you wouldn't have come here with no possibility to win. You felt a quick movement behind you. A move in the air which came till you but nothing to make you fear anything. He or she or whatever is the person, they were still swift, nimble and particularly bold to attack you from behind. You used your powers and created some orange arrows. One of them them exploded in the torso of this so-called killer. You let yourself be distracted a second about the assailant's identity. Who would be foolish enough? This time, you didn't feel the punch coming from the side and you manage to dodge it at the very last second. A kick went right after, sending your unbalanced body hit the lamp post several meters away. The ground was dirty and wet due to the rain. You mumbled several insults while you got up yet another blow came to you. Although, you had just the time to create an energy shield, stopping the move. The person you could identify right now as a man carried on to hit you again and again. Nevertheless, you were sheltered, protected. You had the time to form a real spell in your hand and throw it over the aggressor, making him still and controlled.

Air was twirling around you, as freezing as before, as paralysing as chains. A little bit more and you could've found yourself back in Sokovia. Several leaves danced and followed the wind's moves. Some philosophers would have found inspiration in this if some words originated from a foreign language that you recognized as Russian didn't have echoed there. The man you were holding with your energy was now on rampage. As if he was somehow reactivated, like a robot or some machine, trying to do some brutal movements so as to free himself. He wasn't going to leave so easily anyways. Following the sound, you created a ball in your hand then modified its shape for a sword. You sort of influenced the weapon you were making. Hence, in the grand alley in front of you, you unleashed the orange energy-made saber chased the voice all around you. After, no time you heard some screams of panic, an explosion of medium size due to the energy sword and finally a bigger one corresponding to some helicopter or whatever. You didn't care for it in the end.

You felt your cell phone ring in your pocket. An incoming call from Steve.

"Y/N where have you been?" said the crackling voice.

"I'm near Central Park."you replied with a low tone, full of wariness.

"There's some Hydra agent out there. Be careful. And Bucky fled from the compound" the man continued.

You couldn't help yourself but to release a mocking laugh.

"Too late, Cap."you ended there the talk.

You went ahead in front of Bucky who was watching you with a deadly look in his eyes. It is when you reached out your hand to touch him that he almost freed himself and tried to throttle you.

"Calm down, Barnes." you ordered to the man who didn't come to a standstill.

Talking to him wasn't enough it appeared. Not without fighting when he was in this internal distress. You were able to hear his screams inside of him, aching to come back to his senses. You strengthened the grasp of your energy around his wrists and his shoulders, getting him completely still under your control. You cupped his face and forced him to gaze into your eyes while you were looking for his real self. His soul was buried deep in his mind. You found interesting memories here and there. Torture were the most powerful ones. There was also a young man resembling Steve. You couldn't help but laugh. He was so small. You may not say to the powerful Captain America that he was ridiculously cute when he was younger. Though Wanda could be interested in the mental image you got. You searched deeper and deeper, kind of probing, Bucky's soul.

You suddenly felt a sort of globe when you were sailing into the ocean of the man's life. Or at least, what he remembered. The painful and unwanted murders he had perpetrated against those people who didn't deserve to die. You knew very well how to control someone's muscles, even someone's mind, due to your powers. Yet, breaking the spirit, the moral and making a weapon of a being, even if you were also able to do it, was something you never committed to anyone. Yet, the person's who managed to destroy Bucky's soul the way they did was particularly vicious. To recover from it was almost impossible without help and a safe place to stay as a start. No one could say that the compound was. Tony's resentment was still present and the former Winter Soldier didn't have the right to struggle against it. The latter should say that the one who hated him the most was himself for having killed Tony's parents, as well for every of his targets. He hated himself for all the mothers and fathers he made cry, every family he destroyed, every wife, husband, child he ruined the heart.

You would like to say it wasn't his fault, he was a puppet, that people's judgement was unfair. Then, you felt something in Bucky's body. He was waking up somehow. You withdrew from his mind and release the soul glancing you were giving him. The man's muscles relaxed brutally and he fell down on the wet ground. The rain might have stopped since a certain time now. But your clothes were drenched and Bucky's ones could be very uncomfortable now.

"What happened?" the man asked while he was slowly getting up.

On your left, you heard footsteps echoing on the tar. Soft. Rhythmed. Almost military. It was Steve for sure, certainly wearing his Captain America outfit. Sam was following him.

"Are you alright Bucky?" questioned the blond-haired man.

You frowned a little bit when you heard the interrogation. And you ? You were the one attacked ans still he was more interested in the well-being of this snowy cretin more than yours. You displayed loudly your dissatisfaction and turn your back to move towards the bench where the little puppy was still peacefully sleeping. You took the animal between your arms after checking he wasn't belonging to someone with a collar or something. Then, you opened your energy wings which took you off the ground. You landed only several minutes after in the compound. Natasha, Wanda, Rhodey, Vision and Tony were discussing in the living room while, as you supposed, waiting for you in the building. You didn't care about them and brought your little abandoned puppy into your room. Tony tried to talk to you but upset as you were you didn't give him a glance. You shouldn't care about Steve being worried about Bucky, as you've seen in his mind, they were close friends. Although, you have been an Avenger for a longer time than the Winter Soldier. These Sokovia agreements –or you didn't know what their were and you didn't give a shit about that– weakened enough your team. Choosing between Steve and Tony has been hard and in the end, you didn't get the freedom you hoped. It was barely worth the struggle.

You heard the door closing behind you while Tony was trying to catch you up, keeping the man outside of the room. You used your powers to create a little dog bed with extra blankets and left the puppy inside, as if he was in a nest. You asked to the artificial intelligence to order some dog food adapted for your new friend. And so did the God knows how was called the voice upon your head. You put your pyjamas on and went to bed. It was nearly 2 in the morning and you wouldn't spit on some rest. You fell asleep thinking about the scars left by this war among the Avengers.

You woke up earlier than you would have liked if a furry, troublesome, awfully cute little wasn't licking your face. You couldn't help but freaked, straightening up suddenly under your blankets. It was 6am.

"Gosh..." you whispered while you tried to hide from the puppy's display of love.

Then, you reached the animal and pulled him up against you. You didn't think that what wanted this creature would be your touch, considering the way the animal was clinging to you. It didn't bother you. Most likely the contrary. Right now might be the time to give him a name. However, you had no idea on what could be adapted for such a cutie. He was all black. 'Kuro' might be an interesting option. You would see later.

You had to get up and go practicing on hand-to-hand combat. But this morning, you were accompanied by a sweet little puppy. Its legs were so short due to his young age and must running to catch you up on your way. The compound remained silent. Everyone was still sleeping, which definitely was a nice considering what happened last night. On one hand, your disobedience to the Sokovia agreements, refusing to comply to these stupid rules. On the other hand, the fight with Bucky would be debated. You didn't crave to spend your days in a jail in the middle of the Pacific Ocean or God-knows-where.

You reached soon enough the door leading to the training room. You left the bag of equipment you brought and your little puppy climbed on the bench where all your stuff was more or less unpacked. The animal tilted his head to the side, watching you with great interest. It didn't take a lot of time before the little creature lied down upon the seat and sleep peacefully, catching up all the sleep he needed. You turned your back to the puppy and went towards the punching back in front of you. You nearly jumped out of your skin when you saw the black figure of Bucky meaning back against the wall. You didn't know he had that in him. That was so scary. Besides, the thought of not managing to stop the waves of energy running in your blood was another source of wariness. You spent a certain time trying to figure out what was happening inside of the man's head but he remained as shut as a nutshell. Which appeared displeasing to say the least.

His gaze was hidden behind his long locks of hair. His breathing was not heavy but a bit loud. Was he present here for long? You couldn't say. You were as stuck as the last time. What should be the right words? Not saying anything may be the best thing to do among all the possibilities. In reaction to this thought, you lowered your head a bit and then walked to the punching bag waiting for your attention. You hadn't started for a minute that Bucky was next to you, so close you could've sword he was your shadow. Even though he remained at a very reasonable distance from you.

"You should keep your arm a little higher or you would have it broken in a real fight" Bucky abruptly said to you across the room.

You have been a bit startled by the tone he used, attracting your attention over him.

"What do you want, Winter Soldier?" you asked with neutrality.

"Don't call me that way. I'm no longer a killer under Hydra's orders" he countered with an annoyed sigh.

You looked at him during a certain moment. Not saying anything and studying every of his facial traits. He wouldn't lie anyway.

"This doesn't resemble to what I've seen last night" you replied more severely.

"I..." the man started but he didn't carry on.

He glanced at you a long time. A very long time.

"I am sorry. For what I've done last night. This... This wasn't me and I know..."

Bucky was hesitating, looking for his words. Though, every phrase, every syllab seemed wrong and clumsy to him. He eyes were stuck on the ground.

" 'I shouldn't be alive', 'I'm a monster' . 'Tis all what you have been thinking about for three minutes now." you uttered while giving a voice to your interlocutor's thoughts.

These last sentences didn't make the man move in any way. Pretty strange, wasn't it? His silence was more eloquent than the longest speech and truth sharper than a blade. For the very first time since the day you met, you stepped closer to him. Not that you were keeping yourself at bay from him but it was more on the emotional side. You knew perfectly that you were alike on some points. Not the same and yet not completely different either. As if you were watching your appearance in a mirror. But the reflect was troubled, disturbed, somehow betrayed, by the prism of self-consideration.

You left a long sigh escape your mouth and decided to focus on the punching bag.

"What did you say already? My arm should be higher, is that right?" you inquired and with it, the end of the small discussion.

You felt Bucky coming closer to you and he gently changed the position of your arm while showing you a good posture for a hand-to-hand combat. You swiftly thanked him, so quickly that the man didn't think he heard it correctly. No one has ever been grateful to him, except when he was doing his job as the Winter Soldier. Needless to say it was shady to say the least. He gave you some advices when it came to a fight with punches and kicks. You haven't thought about breakfast only a second. The time you spent in each other's company had been really helpful, particularly because of everything you learnt today. It was nice to talk to someone and to know more about anything. Your appetite for knowledge was stunning sometimes. Your practice session ended when Steve stepping in the room, stumbling on you both while Bucky was holding your arm after you tried to punch him in the face.

"Was a good one Y/N." The man stated before noticing his old friend from the corner of his eye.

He let you go slowly after allowing your arm to get down without hurting you. Your muscle had relaxed and Bucky's grip loosened on your wrist. His metal arm left some red markings in your flesh but nothing you weren't able to handle. It was part of the risks of training with the Winter Soldier after all. You gathered all your stuff, took Kuro with you and passed to Steve's side before showering. Everyone had their breakfast, you were the only ones who missed it. It seems that Vision made it, which wasn't reassuring considering the fact that he is actually a robot which never had the sense of taste. Your only hope remained in the fact that he often watched you cook or bake for the others. In the end, it wasn't that bad.

The sudden and amusing image of Vision walking through the wall of your bedroom to ask you what was the means to bring back memories flashed through your mind. Also, his frown had to be considered as iconic when you explained the concept of Proust's madeleine. This is how he got the idea of goulash for Wanda. Scents and dishes had the power to bring back memories and used it as a means to remind Wanda's past, her family and all she cared for. Even though you had no doubt that she cared for Vision too.

You swallowed quickly your breakfast and went in your bedroom as soon as you finished. You had to practice with your energy too. Its shapes, the range of your attacks and different parameters that no science could predict. You considered rapidly Kuro's presence in your surroundings, currently lying on your bed. The little animal has already been fed since he was now wandering in the compound. Everyone has met the new recruit on your team. Tony didn't agree at first but he finally ended by petting this lovely furry creature. It was quite the sight, his big hands on the puppy's head while he was doing some stuff and checking some things before the afternoon meeting which had the aim to discuss about the day before.

You weren't that afraid, you knew very well what to say in your defence. It wouldn't be the same for Bucky, for all you cared. You stayed here until after midday and the artificial intelligence commanded by Tony reminded you this meeting. Thus, you left your beloved room and joined the other. You sat next to Rhodey and Natasha, more likely circled by them but who cared? Noticing the man who will lead this encounter, the same who presented you the Sokovia agreements, some Secretary of State or whatever.

He displayed a tiresome soliloquy about the fact that you didn't respect the rules you had to follow whatever it takes. And yet, Tony may have countered with the fact that you did everything according what they desired by asking officially an outing. As if you were a prisoner. That was right, you weren't back when the hour came. And if you hadn't been here, Hydra would have been troublesome. What they could have done was not predictable at all and the consequences can excuse your neglect.

Tony's voice was unsure and the old man didn't seem to accept it.

"I can understand it was for the common good but still, what should I say to UNO, to the people, to..." the man was arguing with a fake resolving tone.

"Tell me, mister Secretary of State, or whatever is your role, don't you think it is a bit hypocrite to make such statements?" you asked rhethorically while gazing at your interlocutor.

"No, Y/N. Don't make this worse." Tony warned behind but you hushed him with your powers.

"We've already done worse. Wasn't it a sufficient failure to fight our own allies, fighters and above all friends? How could we beat our own score on the field of nonsense?" you snapped back with an authoritative and unusual volume of voice.

You glanced at each of the people gathered in the room while standing, but this has been an action that no one cared about. Everyone received its glimpse of scorn until you have been tired of. Maybe this could make them think a little bit about themselves. You turned your back and faced now the tall, impressive, more or less charismatic man in front of you.

"As for you, and not only for you but for all these UNO men and and women working in, you are spitting, criticizing tyrants to oppress people. And yet, what are you doing with us? Do you feel safer now that you locked us up like dogs with muzzle? Does this world is clearer, less dangerous? Or more opaque, somber and unreadable?" you snidely stated with a voice full of hidden anger and frustration.

"What should be said about the people you sacrificed then? For your successes"

"If it's about sacrifice that we are going to argue, so let me tell you once for all that the first ones who are going to do it, before folks or anyone, are the guys behind me. Something you never liked to hear mister the Secretary of State. By the way, what did you sacrificed to get yourself to the place you bear now as if you were a supreme authority while you are nothing more than a simple spokesperson for something greater than you? "

"As long as I remember, no one ever called you here, Y/N"

"You know, if dogs could choose their master, if they knew what it involved, none of them would be so faithful. Despite everything, I've chosen to help here because I still have an idea of what is justice, right and wrong. And not because a carrier was demanding it, mister the Secretary of State."

You ended there the conversation. Meanwhile you were hammering your opinion inside your interlocutor's head, and crushing any potentiel reply he could have given to you. The man lowered his head and noticed the danger of you being so close to him. He stepped backwards, making you stop in your own path.

"Well..." the Secretary of State tried before forsaking the idea of saying anything else.

Everything has already been said. What he could leave to you was a mere warning. Then, few minutes of meaningless babbling after, he gathered his people before giving some extra information and left as quickly as he came. Bucky's case hasn't even been evoked through this meeting. Was it a big issue? Not that much and you felt him grateful.

"You can be really threatening when someone annoys you." Steve stated kindly after the release of pressure within the compound.

The latter was delighted that you shushed the Secretary of State or whatever this guy was. May he report the meeting to his mates with ties and expensive costumes, you didn't care. You weren't afraid of the decisions that could be taken about you. It needed more to impress you.

The compound got back to its usual calm and quietness. Nothing bothered you anymore. You spent some time with Wanda who thanked for saying all you said to the Secretary of State. Even though with the tone you used to talk to him. Your bitterness and the emotions you put in your speech addressed to this grey-haires old man. However, you apologized towards your new leader for the issues he would face but you assumed it would go very well. The one who would rightfully claim he shushed the great Tony Stark wasn't born.

You chose a book among all you had in your shelves and started to read. It was Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice, you didn't know that you had a copy here. You were fully captivated by the story when you noticed the night befell on the world outside. Vision came quickly to ask you if you were hungry and he got a negative answer. Though, he remained insistent on the fact that you should make an appearance in the living room for the movie tonight. They picked a bad one though, making you completely uninterested in the images shifting devoid of any meaning on the screen. You heard the thoughts of each Avenger and according to their internal remarks about what was happening in front of their eyes, you could say there was nothing exhilarating in this same feature film. You understood something about a documentary about beavers that could have been more enlightening according to Sam. Well, he didn't phrase it that way in his head but the idea remains the same. You just came in the lounge at the climax of the film and then disappeared again.

It is nearly 1am that it occurred that you didn't see Kuro in your room, which was definitely suspicious. Wearing your pyjamas at this hour of the night, you went down the stairs to find your little puppy. The ground was cold and your bare feet didn't make any sound. Yet, once you reached the possible location where your dog could rest peacefully, you found quite a sight actually. It was notoriously know after all that this furry ball named Kuro was sleeping nearly half of the day wherever he can be, meaning he would me more than happy to sleep in a cage full of starving lions.

"I can't sleep, Steve." Bucky said with an empty voice, almost cracking sometimes.

"Nightmares, right ?" the blond-haired man replied with a benevolent look in his eyes.

The first was petting carefully the puppy you were looking for.

"I can't even trust my mind when I'm awake. What should I do if I kill people while I'm asleep? What will stop me? "

Steve would like to say something but still, he wasn't able to answer the right thing to his friend.

"Maybe you should ask Y/N. They know a lot about mind control and all."

The suggestion wasn't devoid of good sense and the black-haired man had to admit that he had never thought about it. Requesting an advice and some help, even though it was only for sleeping never crossed his mind. And he may also lack of confidence when it comes to his weaknesses. He might want to be able to handle by himself.

"You're not alone, Buck" Steve ended with a gentle on his friend's shoulder.

Thereupon, you noticed your former leader getting up from the couch and left the Winter Soldier as he was taken far from reality by his invasive thoughts. He was petting Kuro very kindly and the puppy was resting peacefully in his arms. He didn't feel your presence nor sitting next to him, making him jump out of his skin. He managed to suppress his deadly reflexes at the last second.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to startle you" You apologized with a low tone.

Bucky shook his head rapidly. His eyesight was anchored to the ground, refusing to let go the detail that was catching so well his attention. His hand was petting mechanically your peaceful puppy.

"Are you alright?" you warily asked with a kind and unusual voice.

"I... I don't know..."Bucky mumbled while he pulled away his attention from the tile square he had his eyes locked on.

You saw him turn his head and gaze at you with a heartbraking despair and confusion, tears glinting in the corner of his eyes. Yet, he blinked. Chasing this poor view he was making of himself from your sight. You didn't mind. Having a smashed mind due to the torture, or suffering an attempt, was a harsh ordeal to overcome, mostly because of all the psychological consequences. And so did Bucky undergo since he broke free.

"You're afraid to unleash the Winter Soldier while you sleep, aren't you?"

The man nodded quietly. What could he add? This was the truth he was scared to death to kill more people. He was already fighting the dark waves of guilt in his heart, his effort couldn't be reduced to ashes and dust because of that monster slumbering within his head, equally part of himself as Bucky. He feared he would never get rid of this monster inside his head.

You lankily sighed and reached out your hand to leave a gentle tap on the man's shoulder. It was quite unusual for you to express such friendliness but, still, Bucky needed it. You saw his lip curl upwards when he looked at you. Fake or true, you never knew. Maybe both.

"This is not because you stop to sleep that you'll get any better. On the contrary, dwelling and not resting will make you increase your chances to lose control over yourself."you warned with a sharp tone, you wanted this to be engraved on Bucky's mind.

"Then what? What could I do when these fucking nightmares scare the shit out of me?" the man exclaimed with a barely controlled voice.

"Guilt consumes you. That's the reason why you don't allow yourself to sleep at night. You think you haven't the right to rest. Is that's wrong?"

Bucky couldn't move. The paralyzing truth froze his bones, disgust and self-hatred suddenly running in his veins. He didn't feel worthy to close his eyes and just have some rest, even for a couple of hours. The more he dwells, the more he was risking to kill someone, being out of control. You noticed him nod to your statement.

"If it is only about nightmares. I can do something about that."you proposed quietly.

Bucky glanced at you, a glint of hope lighting his face marked with suffering.

"You can do that?" asked obliviously Bucky.

"I've also heard the end of the conversation you had with Steve."

The man got a strange look in his eyes. What was he thinking about? You didn't know. You could answer this question but it wasn't your intention. Then, you gave up the idea and focused on the task at hand.

"Anyways, do you want me to use my powers?" you inquired with a pressing tone.

And once more, Bucky nodded. You requested from him to close his eyes and just breath lankily. So he did and while he was getting calmer and calmer then fully relaxed by the waves of your power. You approached your hand to his eyes and the orange energy shaping a ball released a hypnotic music within Bucky's mind and a short minute after his head fell on the back of the sofa. His muscles fully eased. Thus, you used your telekinesis and lifted the man until his room. He was almost cute, all happy with your puppy on his torso. He wouldn't have any dream nor nightmare. You suppressed his ability of imagination for several hours. Then, he would get it back and lightly getting up from the limbo of the deepest and most peaceful slumber. Folding down the blankets, you left your puppy and the man having some rest. They both seem delighted, though it was most visible on Kuro the dog spread out all along its length over the bed next to the man. The door shut behind you and you left to join your own bedroom. Numbing Bucky's imagination was more tiring than you would have thought but the Winter Soldier wouldn't show up. All in all, it was a small victory.

You didn't wake up when dawn had come to the compound. Your energy was a bit drained and your own rest has been more tiresome than really relaxing. However, it was the risk you accepted when you offered to help Bucky. And then, after a short night and the call from Friday to got up more or less easily. Watching you in the mirror had been a hardship, you barely recognizes yourself. You took some time to erase the markings from your tiredness and then, you went to take your breakfast. Clint said that he got the authorization to go back in his family and he was really excited to be able to finally see his wife and children.

"Sorry guys but I won't make you breakfast anymore" the archer joked with a singular glint of mischief in his eyes.

You smiled at him while Wanda was congratulating him cheerfully. And the others were all giving him warm comments and expressing their happiness for him. It seemed that Tony was personally insulted by this departure. As if the Avengers were torn apart again. You saw in his mind that he remembered when he fought against Steve but this image was blurred by a sweet filter of friendship for the warrior. The question of where was Bucky has been quickly raised. You remembered that the spell you used on him was still clouding his mind. You excused yourself and left the table to find the man in his room. Kuro was licking the man's face but nothing was efficient enough to pull him from the calm slumber. Thus, you approached your hand to his forehead and with a wave of energy you brought him to reality. It didn't take long before his eyelids would open and he could remember the world he was in.

"What...?" Bucky asked, his voice hoarse and a very eloquent red trace on his cheek.

"Hello." you greeted with a gentle tone.

"I..."Bucky started to say.

He wanted to ask if five minutes had passed since you employed that spell of yours. He remembered clearly asking you to use your magic or whatever you called your powers and then, he didn't know. His muscles were so relaxed, he was so calm. No dreams, no nightmares. A peaceful sleep. He desired it so much and he had it. No pain, no suffering, no memories –

Everything was okay. He couldn't help but a small smile curled his lips upwards, making his face glow with a charming aura. For a second, you felt that Bucky didn't have his guts tightening and tied in knots he couldn't unravel without being injured somehow. On the contrary, he sensed his heart being free and in peace. You made your way to the door and left there the man. He got up from his bed and caught up the discussion about Clint and his family five minutes later.

You spent the day trying to restore the energy you used on Bucky to numb his subconscious. It wasn't so easy though. You didn't pay a visit to the training room. Steve and Natasha were undoubtedly practicing right now. You didn't want to interrupt and your reflexes were altered by the way. Not being at the highest level of reflexion, reaction and everything alike was just a huge hallway to an injury. So you stayed far away from the room. You were watching Vision studying Kuro very closely, making Wanda smile and laugh. You were slightly worried for the puppy but the robot kept a very careful behavior towards the small and curious creature. By the way, the woman taught to Vision how to pet the puppy. You could see them delighted to experience something really common for a lot of people.

You were so lost in your contemplation of them that you didn't hear Bucky sitting next to you on the couch. You almost jumped out of your skin when you noticed him. You scowled him a little for being so silent and not warning you. A grin took its place on his facial traits and you swore internally you would kill him if he remained so glad to have scared you. Though, when he perceived your annoyed glance, his small smile fell down his face and he became more concerned by what you were going to say. Then, he stared at the ground and remained quiet for a minute.

"I... Wanted to thank you" Bucky voiced out, his cheeks slightly reddening. "I don't know what I could have done if you weren't there"

"You were hopeless, anxious and blathering nonsense. No need to be grateful. I did what I thought was right." you replied with an empty tone, as if your own words had no impact on yourself first, even though it was a lie because you were obviously happy about that.

A little bit of thankfulness for a monster such as yourself according to your own judgement was always delighting. You had no intention to say anything about it to Bucky however. A comfortable silence filled the space around you. Wanda and Vision took your puppy and went to play with him elsewhere. In the meantime, the Winter Soldier's eyes were stuck on your gaze, scrutinizing you where a not so long distance was separating you both. You could notice he was refraining from saying anything which might be inappropriate. You couldn't figure out what, though.

"Is there something you may want to ask me?" You inquired with a strangely gentle tone.

Bucky took some time to think about it. You noticed only now that he was particularly cautious around you, and with his words too. Having a completely different way to talk with you, in comparison of how he could speak with Steve. The best behavior to have in your presence.

"Can mind control be cured?" he questioned with a weird politeness. Not that it wasn't pleasing but it looked fake. His way to talk in old American English from the Brooklyn of the 40's felt natural coming from him. Not this Loki-like way to speak. You almost corrected it for that but it wasn't necessary.

“It’s not that easy but the effects can be limited, a broken mind leaves inevitably scars.” you added thoughtfully, brows furrowed trying to get the best answer to Bucky’s worries. “And a stable spirit in a stable body isn’t devoid of interest when it comes to this matter.”

The warning was clear and sharp, no more stupid ideas such as being deliberately deprived of rest. Despair and helplessness don’t mean recklessness. Your former sentence rang surely a bell within Bucky, making him flustered for such impatience to cause his own ruin. He should say he was sorry, though, what effect it would have? Other than an unwanted pity over him and a descent of the esteem that you did not have for him in the first place. Bucky thought you disliked him at best, loathed him at worst for the split among the Avengers and their reasons to fight. He should know better after the argument you had the day before. Humans were humans, even with powers beyond the common man.

“Meaning that you can heal me?” inquired Bucky while his eyes lit up.

“Did you listen to what I’ve just said?” you replied with a sharp tone.

It seemed that sleeping was raising a certain eargerness in Bucky. Not that it was disturbing actually, dealing with the Avengers also meant learning patience. You sighed lankily while you summoned a ball of orange light to test the energy left to recover in you. It would be adequate to you need of it for attempting aything on Bucky’s mind. You were simply accelerating the healing process. What was left after that was the man’s issue. Though, not only did the man had to tackle with the significance of your powers in him, but also with potential deadly aftereffects. It didn’t appear that it scared him. Quite the contrary actually. He responded with a sad look that he already was already tortured by these nightmares or memories and whatever could threaten him in his own mind, it wouldn’t be worse than what he was suffering. You didn’t agree with this last statement, objecting that it might not be what he needs.

Sincerely convinced, equally fostered somehow by what he discussed with Steve last night about your area of expertise and the skills you got after years of practice, he asked you to help. Under this condition, you would be ashamed to refuse him anything. You asked him to lie down on the couch and ordered him to close his eyes. Getting your hand circling over Bucky’s face while his eyes were open, turning more orange each second passing and then, the man tipped over into another world full of images without links between them except that they were known to him. You found another memories, slightly different from the day before, almost shifting and blurry. You figured out it was your presence. His emotions followed one another. It was quite intriguing to feel sadness then hope, anger, despair, hatred. Along your thorough expertise, you never found any peace, relief or authorization to slow down the rythm. Only raw sentiments, basic ones, almost shady, tainted of dark hues, ones which could never be lighter and closer to happiness.

You perceived Bucky flinch and shake a little when you reached a particular area of his mind. The illusion was darker, shifting. Delusions were how you worked to get the informations you needed, by creating a whole dimension within people but it wasn’t the point. The shape of what you had in front of you did not have any. More like a black hole, infinitely deep and heavy. Beyond a certain line, you could harm Bucky. Yet, you felt something beating here, like a heart or something. It didn’t have any shape, or you may not be able to give one to it. Was it literally the Winter Soldier? Or was it where the heart of Bucky was trapped somehow? You could not say, nor identify it. This was quite the infuriating puzzle but an interesting challenge nonetheless. You felt be withdrawn without your consent. Bucky was somehow waking up.

Then, you returned to reality and described what you saw. Bucky found himself clueless, you were the one with the talent. What you couldn’t say was that you were as lost as him. However, it was quite logical to consider it wasn’t such an issue after one session. And then you started a conversation about what you saw, asking for more details. You couldn’t say that the sight of a smaller Steve before becoming Captain America amazed you a second time. And you laughed about it. And some other things related to Hydra and Zemo among other things. He also told him some stories which happened during the WWII that no one talks about. There were also the fights and the opponents. He also describe the Brooklyn of the 40′s. Even though you watched it as if you were in Bucky’s place when women were interested in him. Not that it wasn’t the case these last days but he had enough to think about.

You found yourself getting closer to the man and it wasn’t the plan at the start. What you weren’t prepared to know is that since you were wandering within Bucky’s memories and all, he did it to you too. Accidentally. And he asked you about some of your loved ones that it hurt you to mention. Yet, since you will have to know your colleague and his darkest sides, you had to uncover some of yours too. Trust was the basis of the weak relashionship you solely had to have. And the more sessions went, the more you found some tenders sides in Bucky. Those were particularly hidden. The most treasured memories. If before it was only raw emotions you felt, right now they are a clearer shape and more details such as the twisting of Bucky’s guts when it came to Steve, the sentiment of failure coupled with a stronger one of confusion when he was punching the latter in the face or the despair. You sensed the emptyness within the man when the pipe or whatever was it when he fell down that train.

One day, you felt something strange around the projection of your spirit within Bucky’s mind. Lawless, powerful, you couldn’t identify it. Nonetheless, you needed it to unlock the thick, intricate mecanism around that beating thing. You figured out that if it was the Winter Soldier who waited patiently for his freedom; then you’d have to do something about it and put in a way more solid jail than he was already trapped in. When you asked to the man what he could be, he turned his gaze away from you. It was suspicious but you would discover what he is hiding from you anyways.

Bucky knew he couldn’t lie to you and... Well, how he’d be able to say to you that your way to soothe him was more efficient than you thought. He was keeping a little bit of the truth each time about his real state. He was a new man, he felt it. He didn’t feel any better in his head, he was still so afraid of himself, what he could do. Although, you were here and your gentle tone saying it was okay made him so happy. You were more reassuring than you imagined and the illusion you were giving of yourself. He saw it when he wandered among the floating screens of your unconscious and he watched you love someone passionately and lose this beloved one. You seemed so perfect together and here he was asking you to help him. In the darkness around him when he discovered all these details about you that he could have never guessed, he found the light of love shining bright inside your chest. And the wild thought saying you were in love with someone crushed him, and the mental link between you two gave you a headache for a week. 

Another day, you wandered to the man’s imagination, his regrets and the thoughts of what he wanted to say, to do instead of how he really acted.You found very useful clues here. And some you didn’t know what to do with. Which werre clearly unsettling. You risked to break the link once more but you held it still enough not to separate from him again. You had to admit that the illusion almost fell but you managed to stabilize the image before it turns all blurry and the mental breaks without possibility to resume the chain of thoughts you grasped some time before. Eitherway, every image would have been altered and not pue from Bucky’s influence. It wasn’t his fault however, you could hardly blame it.

“Are you sure everything is alright?” you inquired with a neutral tone while Bucky was somewhat captivated by the fact that he was trying to avoid your inquisitive glance.

“Yeah I am” he replied blankly.

“Yes, play dumb. It’s very funny, I assure you” you ironized with fake scorn to your interlocutor.

Bucky didn’t aswer back to your sharp tone. He was seeing things too and most of them were as unsettling as whatever you could’ve noticed in his mind. Knowing a person fully, each detail of the past as if being these very same people, was so unnerving and mostly scary. But then, the man liked what he saw and felt after all the hours spent in your own mind. He liked you, your being, your mistakes and your achievements. He has been amazed, raising and reminding him this forgotten sentiment called love, with all it implied.

“Don’t need to explain. I know” you ended there with a smile on your lips.

Bucky doubted of these sentiments storming inside his heart and his guts like sea monsters which are fighting for dominance over as illusional as the universe he was discovering sessions after sessions.

“You know what?” inquired the man with interest.

Your smile grew wider as you reached out your hand to touch his next to yours on the couch. As if it was kind of a reflex, Bucky leaned to your touch and left himself be. It was reassuring. And, as an answer, the fingers of his flesh hand curled up onto yours. Maybe the start of a new life. Both of you didn’t know. One day, you might be free.

So, another idea that I had and I just needed to write. Bucky doesn't really shows up, but it's about him, so... I hope you like. While I was writing I remembered a real good Brazilian song (Pra Você Guardei O Amor). English is not my first language and I didn't proofread the text, so you'll probably find some mistakes. It might have a part two, tell me what you think

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Work count: 545

Warnings: none.

How do I Say I Love You?

Y/N's POV

I love you. Three words, eight letters. It shouldn't be this hard to say this to the one person you have been dating for the last four months and, before that, had been you best friend for years, right? Except, it is.

I was never the person to put my feelings into words. Don't get me wrong, I know the importance of communication and I think I do a good job when it comes to that... If we are not talking about sentiments. It just don't come out, I don't know what I'm afraid of, I know that Bucky loves me. I can feel love emanating from him and he've been saying to me everyday since last month, when he said for the first time. The soldier, always the most kind and understanding person in the universe, doesn't look worried for my lack of verbal response, he even said it was alright. But, it is not, and I am aware of that, it's always on my mind.

So, I try to put this endless love that I have for him into every little action, every single thing that I do: a cup of coffee when he comes home tired and yet wants to talk about the day; a massage in his shoulder (that he never asks for, but I always know when he needs one); a hug after a nightmare (or at any other moment of the day when the sight of him is just to much lovable); a sleepy kiss; a hungry kiss; a - I'm still mad that you ate all my cookies, but you're more important - kiss...

The list could go on forever, but still, it's not enough, is it? Who wants to be with someone that can't verbalize their love? What if he gets tired of waiting? What if he goes on a mission and, no! I'm not taking that road. I need to find a way of letting him know, one that involves words, that him will know that I mean.

Oh, I think I know how I'm going to do this and will be with something that we both love: music.

Some time later, and I finally have the playlist created. Doubts and antecipation starts to take place at mind. Am I being silly? Should I wait for him to come home or should I just send it now?

I decide on sending him the link before I give up the courage.

Hey Lover - Daughters of Eve

I've Got A Crush On You - Ella Fitzgerald

Do I Love You? - The Ronettes

My Special Angel - The Vogues

I Love You So - The Chantels

Heart and Soul - The Four Aces

More Today Than Yesterday - The Spiral Starecase

My One And Only Love - Ella Fitzgerald

There! I've Said It Again - Bobby Vinton

P.S. I Love You - Billie Holiday

I really hope he understands it and gets to feel at least a little of all the love I have to give to him, all the love that I kept with me for not knowing how to share, all that love that is inside of me, but in reality is his. Because my mind is his, my body is his and I'm his.

Old Friends

This time the inspiration came from a Tinder conversation I saw on Reddit (didn’t could find later to put it here, though) and instantly thought about some situation with Bucky. So, that’s it, I hope you enjoy! Like always, English is not my first language and I was a little sleepy writing this so, expect some mistakes.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (female)

Warnings: none. not proofread

Word count: 502.

Bucky’s POV

     She was coming, walking straight towards him. The girl he’s been looking through the whole night and trying to collect enough courage to talk to. When Sam brought him to this bar, he didn’t think anything different than the usual would happen, but after a few minutes being there, his eyes caught her on the other end of the room and he just couldn’t help but stare. Even with Sam constantly pushing him to go talk to her, he couldn’t do it. And now, she was coming in his direction, and he didn’t have a clue on what to do.

     - Hey, I’m Y/n L/n. – She said while offering her hand to him when she got at their table.

     - Bucky Barnes. Hi.

     - So, Bucky, what do you say we play a game? – The woman had a look of playfulness in her eyes, and suddenly Bucky was feeling (even more) nervous. Sam just observed the scene trying to find out what would come from that interaction.

     - What kind of game? – He asked with uncertainty, but at the same time wanting to spend some more time with the beautiful girl who took his attention through all the night.

     - It’s simple. We’re just going to pretend like we’re old friends who lost touch with each other, like 10 years ago or something like that. What do you say? You first? – Bucky took some time to considerate his options and concluded that he got nothing to lose by going with this. So, he took a breath and entered in character (at least he hoped he succeeded on this, after being in a lot of disguised missions, it shouldn’t have been hard).

     - Y/n, is you? I’m Bucky, remember? We don’t talk since the Eiffel Tower incident. How are you?

     - Sorry, I’m not sure if I remember you – She said with her brows furrowed feigning confusion and then she winked and mouthed “You’re doing good”. He smiled at that and answered.

     - We had a few classes together at college, I used to have my hair shorter and was in the football team.

     - Oh, Bucky! Now I remember you. My phone got broke some time ago and I ended up losing all my contacts. Do you mind telling me your number again so we can keep in touch this time?

     - Well, that was- that was good. – He said really surprised, not having expect the conversation to take this path right away, but enjoying that it did, nonetheless. Sam couldn’t help but laugh at Bucky’s expression.

     - Good enough for you to give me your number? – She asked while offering her phone to him and Bucky didn’t think twice before taking it in his hands and adding his number there, proceeding to give it back to her when he was done. – I’ll call you. – And then she winked and turned around to leave. Little did they know that they would end up being so much more than just (fake old) friends.

To Die Alone

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader (Soulmate!AU)

Word Count: 631

Warnings: a little bit of angst, but it’s fluffy

This idea popped in my head out of the blue and I just had to write it. Not proofread. Hope you like it! :D

Before he went to the war and his life practically ended, just to begin again, Bucky Barnes used to wonder why he didn’t have a soulmate. Though he usually just shrugged off and said that he wasn’t one to settle for one girl when someone would ask about it, the truth was he couldn’t help but think about his situation.

  Was he destined to be alone forever? To die alone? Was it some mistake of the Universe that he was the only one who didn’t have the first words that his soulmate was going to say to him on his right arm like everybody else?

  He got the answers to his wonders when he fell off that train and was captured by HYDRA. Of course I don’t have a soulmate. The Universe knew what was going to happen to me. He came to that conclusion once he was free from HYDRA and could think for himself. At the same time he felt comforted by that thought (that he didn’t let a lover waiting for him in the forties, alone), he felt sad, extremely sad. He was living free again, almost a century later, and he was still the only person without his other half. It is my burden to live alone. To die alone.

_______________________________________________________________

  Bucky now lived with the Avengers, he was a part of them.  That means he often had to sit in a room full of super heroes (and their super egos) for more than one hour discussing missions. He hated that part. That’s why the former Winter Soldier was more than relieved when one more of this meeting ended. Without a word to any of his teammates, he stormed off the room wanting to get to his floor as soon as possible.

  But, life has never been easy for him. The second he turned the hallway, his tall frame collided with one much smaller and fragile. If it weren’t for his enhanced reflexes, the woman who just ran into him (or him into her) would’ve ended up on the floor for sure. Lucky for her, he was able to catch her before that happened.

     - Sorry miss, I wasn’t looking where I was going and… - The words died in his tongue when his eyes found her face. She was beautiful, just like an angel. - Wow.

  Bucky, then, took in her wide eyes and startled face and realized he should be looking like a psycho or something staring at her like that. He took a step back, apologized again and went to go to his room when she stopped him by holding his arm.

  He looked at her face, then her hand on his arm and that was when he saw. She was holding him with her right arm, and on it he could see the words he had just said to this woman, this angel. Bucky’s mind now was a thousand miles per hour. I am her soulmate. But, how? He didn’t have a soulmate. Or did he?

  Once again his eyes went to her face and now she was smiling.

     - I don’t-I don’t understand. I never had anything on my arm. - He managed to say, still doubting this was really happening.

  The woman didn’t speak with him. Instead, she took a little notebook and a pen from the bag she was carrying and wrote something on it. When she was done, she showed him the paper. 

I’m Y/n. Lost my voice some years ago. It’s good finally meeting my soulmate.

  And she was smiling again. Bucky felt his own lips turn upward. The Universe hadn’t wronged him. He wasn’t going to die alone. He had a soulmate. For the first time in his life he felt like he wasn’t empty. He was worthy of love after all.

Y/N, on the phone: Can you buy me ice cream from the store?

Bucky: It's 3am

Y/N: So is that a yes or...

Bucky: You're a grown adult, do it yourself

Y/N: I knew you never loved me

Throwing an idea out for the future: beauty and the beast with winter soldier bucky. Imagine you plead for him to let your father go, willing to take his place instead. Imagine your softness breaks him out of prison his mind is held in.

It doesn’t happen instantly but the soldier slowly learns to care of the soft, sweet thing that is now his captive.

Imagine the way he’d grow protective over you over time.

Imagine how sweet he’d be if he went from speaking roughly in Russian to his soft Brooklyn drawl the day he snaps out of the mind control.

You’re not sure what’s happening.

“Soldat?” You whisper, hesitantly bringing your hand to his scruffy cheek.

“цветок” (flower) he whispers back, that precious name he’d given just for you, “it’s me, flower”

Angst

All the kisses.

Smut?

A need.

Chicken nuggies.

Crack thought with all the fluff. ALL the fluff. Maybe a tiny dash of angst at the start but it's to set the plot.

Everything that could have possibly gone wrong went sideways as soon as the mission started. The team was ambushed. Bucky was separated from everyone else. His trigger words blared through the speakers and there was nothing anyone could do to stop the soldier from awakening.

Worst of all, you were badly injured. Steve groaned in pain, struggling to pull himself up when he saw the solider lock his eyes on your limp form, taking long strides towards you with purpose.

That wasn't good.

"Tony-I-I need back up, y/n is-what the hell"

Steve blinked watching his friend pick you up with the utmost care, holding you securely in his arms. A hydra agent attempted to order him, only to be silenced with a knife thrown to the throat. The soldier made his way towards the exit with you along with a limping Steve trailing behind him.

"Buck-

"Быстрее" [move] he ordered, carrying you close to his chest and sitting in his designated on the spot on the jet. He didn't say a word as the others filed in, growling when Tony didn't start the engine up fast enough. No one dared look in your direction, not wanting to make the wrong move and happy that Bucky had busied himself with looking over your injuries, mumbling in Russian while letting his hand brush over your cheek.

As soon as the jet touched the ground, he was on his feet and carrying you over to the medbay, refusing to set you down until he saw a doctor ready to help. While it wasn't exactly protocol to have him in the operating room while the doctors worked, no one was interested in arguing back with him when he placed himself in a corner, watching intently. His blue eyes which were normally filled with warmth and softness were now stone cold, eyeing every single movement of what was being done to you, his gaze relaxing when the surgeon gave him a shaky thumbs up.

He sat by your side the entire time, gear still strapped to his body, watching the steady beep of your heart monitor while you slept, the rest of the team quietly waiting outside. Sam peered in, quickly retreating back when Bucky glowered at him, getting up and closing the door so you could rest. He and Steve continued to peep through the little glass window, immediately ducking when they could feel steel blue eyes watching him.

"Do we try and help or-

"I don't want to die yet, also based on what I'm seeing, y/n in the safest place she could be"

You sighed happily as you blinked awake, feeling hazy as if you were floating upon the softest of clouds. The room was bright and clean, you could have been in heaven for all you knew.

Or you were just high as a kite from all the pain killers.

Then you saw him beside you.

Such a gorgeous man.

Handsome.

One who gave you butterflies with shy smiles.

"Soldat" You giggled, reaching over to stroke his scruffy cheek, brushing your thumb over the scowl on his lips, "Hi" You admired his sharp jaw, idly tracing over his features while his mouth twitched into something of a smile, all his muscles finally relaxing seeing you awake.

You yawned, stretching yourself out like a kitten out before rolling over with a flop to face the very pretty man who was sitting at your bedside. Your admiration was cut short with the rumble of your tummy.

There was only one thing you wanted now.

"Soldat, I want chicken nuggies" You demanded, the growl of your stomach solidifying your request. He simply nodded, getting up and out of his seat, making his way over to the one place he knew you'd want your "nuggies" from.

"H-how may I h-help you" The Mc Donald's cashier stared at the numerous guns and knifes strapped to the infamous soldier, his metal arm pointing to a kids meal combo that came with a 6 piece nugget.

A little red box was placed in front of him at lightening speed but that wasn't good enough. He peered into the bag, frowning when he saw a toy that you already had. He grabbed it and placed it back onto the counter, staring at the trembling employee while they rummaged to find a new one, grabbing fistfuls and stuffing into the bag instead. The soldier nodded when he was given one you didn't have before, making his way back to ensure you were fed.

It didn't take long for the news outlets to catch on that the Winter Soldier was out buying Happy Meals.

*Tony's suit, Thors hammer, Steve's now broken shield and some gentle deprogramming later*

"Still want more nuggies" You murmured against Bucky's chest, still a little hazy while he chuckled, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.

"I'll always get you chicken nuggies, doll"

Everyone might’ve heard us - Bucky Barnes headcanons & drabble

Summary: a set of headcanons & a little drabble for drunk sex with Bucky

Warnings: smut (unprotected p in v), semi-public sex, drunk sex, female reader

Author: Fenrir

A/N: Today's prompt is: drunk sex.

Masterlist

Everything becomes incredibly heightened when alcohol courses through his veins.

Barnes may be a little more aggressive in his sexual advances. 

Get ready to be thoroughly dominated and fucked mercilessly.

He's consistently forgetful about using condoms.

When he's drunk, Bucky becomes more interested in the idea of public sex - the mere possibility of getting caught red-handed is driving him wild.

Under normal circumstances, he can stifle his moans when you work your magic on his neck, but with the assistance of alcohol, he's a cacophony of pleasure - he’ll groan louder and more often.“Fuck, doll, you’re going to leave a trail of hickeys on my neck, aren’t ya?”

He'll thrust with unrestrained intensity, abandoning his usual caution as he seeks to pleasure you. He will be unstoppable.

Picture this: you both in front of a mirror, where he'll force you to watch how his thick cock slides in and out of your pussy. “You like that, babe? Look at that. My dick fits you fucking perfectly.”

And when he's inebriated, he tends to get a bit cheeky, chuckling as your body jolts because of overstimulation.

"Was that too much for you, babe?" 

He's the type to initiate a passionate makeout session while you're in the midst of your fucking session, savouring the intoxicating taste of alcohol and your essence on your lips.

And here's a surprise — he'll want to experiment with your vibrator, using it to enhance his own pleasure, fucking your tight asshole with the toy while his fat dick is buried deep in your needy cunt.

Bucky's moans will reach a level of eroticism that feels like the very essence of desire. He’s going to sound like a fucking porn star.

He'll cup and squeeze your breasts like there is no tomorrow.

Get ready for ultra hard spanking, especially involving his bionic hand.

He'll deliver the most intense spanks while fucking your tight cunny from behind. Bucky isn’t typically into things that could cause you pain, but now he's gripping your hair like he's taming a wild stallion.

If you happen to be on top, of him, riding his dick, Bucky'll take control by gripping your hips firmly, rendering you immobile while he thrusts up into you with such force that you'll need to cup a headboard to prevent yourself from falling off; the sole sound in the room will be his ball sack slapping against the plush of your ass.

Bucky’s a fucking tease and he would rub his hardened shaft against your wet clit and folds first before sliding it on without a single warning. “Yeah, fuck, you’re so tight for me.”

“Baaaby, ‘m gonna cum inside of you, ok?”

The soft glow of candlelight cast a warm ambiance over the restaurant as Bucky and you sat across from each other at a cosy corner table. The low hum of chatter and clinking cutlery surrounded you, creating a perfect backdrop for the evening ahead.

You had chosen a dress that you felt confident and beautiful in, its neckline gracefully emphasising your décolletage. The deep, rich colour of the dress seemed to catch the candlelight just right, enhancing the allure of the moment.

As the two of you delved into conversation, you couldn't help but notice Bucky's lingering gaze, his eyes locked onto you. His usual demeanour was softened by a faint, appreciative smile, and his blue eyes held a certain warmth that spoke volumes. It was as if the rest of the world had faded into the background, and in that moment, it was just the two of you, lost in the magnetic pull of your connection.

_________________________________

Bucky firmly pressed your face against the restroom door of the restaurant, his hand gripping your neck, and his bionic elbow securing you in place. His other hand boldly explored your ass, while his lips trailed against your cheek. “So fucking sexy, aren’t you, doll?”

You trembled at his touch, a dampness growing bigger between your thighs.

Hiking your dress up slightly, Barnes cupped his hand over your clothed core, groping it, smirking widely as he felt how wet you were. Bucky purred, releasing his firm hold on you and withdrawing his hand from your pussy. With a deft move, he spun you around to face him. His hungry lips devoured yours in an intense, passionate kiss. As the heat between you intensified, your hands urgently worked to remove each other's clothing. Bucky's hand slid up, hiking the dress to your tummy while his bionic arm worked on the fly of his jeans.

Breaking the kiss momentarily, Bucky locked eyes with you, searching for any hint of hesitation and finding none.

His hand firmly gripped the shaft of his hard dick that was freed, aligning it with your eager entrance, all the while maintaining intense eye contact with you. He entered you at a tantalisingly slow pace, and both of you couldn't help but moan in unison. Your fingers dug into Bucky's back as you clung to him.

Barnes' hands held your sides, and he began a rhythmic thrusting motion, pulling out and pushing in, all while burying his head in the crook of your neck. 

Both of you panted heavily, your nails leaving their mark on his skin, which only intensified his groans as he quickened his pace. "Fuck." 

Your legs wrapped around his waist as he held you mid-air, allowing for even deeper thrusts, his hips meeting yours with a passionate intensity.

Intense waves of pleasure coursed through your bodies, leaving you both in a state of ecstasy.

Your silky walls tightened around him, causing Bucky's cock to throb with pleasure. His hold on your sides grew even firmer; you could be sure he'd leave bruises there.

"You feel so amazing around my cock," Bucky moaned, his Romanian accent becoming deeper as he peppered the crook of your neck with sloppy, open-mouthed kisses. One of his hands wandered from your side, trailing up to the back of your head, fingers threading through your hair and gripping firmly.

"Bucky," you moaned in response as he continued his rhythmic thrusting, and they grew faster and more primal.

The room echoed with moans, groans, and the sounds of skin slapping against skin, a cacophony of pleasure. Both of you were lost in pure bliss, completely unconcerned about the possibility of anyone overhearing or getting into the restroom to catch you both red-handed.

As a familiar sensation welled up in the pit of your stomach, you could sense Bucky approaching his climax. His thrusts grew sloppier, his bionic hand that had been on your left sides now moving down to where you were intimately connected. The pad of his metal thumb found your clit, and he began rubbing it in rough circles, causing your toes to curl in your shoes as your orgasm surged through you.

Barnes wasn't far behind, delivering one final powerful thrust before his cock convulsed inside you. 

Your walls clenched tightly around him, and both of you reached the peak of pleasure simultaneously, filling the restroom with loud, unrestrained moans.

As he softened inside you, Bucky murmured a quiet, "I fucking love ya, babe."

Bucky leaned in close, his voice a hushed whisper, a mischievous glint in his eyes, "There's something about that electrifying thrill in my spine and tummy when I think about the possibility of getting caught fucking your cunt senseless." Bucky added with a cocky grin, "I'm pretty sure everyone in the dining room heard us."

ohmygod!!! this is fucking incredible!!💞💞💞

Be Mean To Me

Pairing: Bucky x f!reader

Summary: After a long day at work, you just want to lose all control and have your boyfriend fuck you into oblivion 

Warnings: Established relationship, slight angst, fluff, smut, mean!dom!bucky, reader asks for it, they are so in love, rough sex, dom/sub dynamics, oral (male receiving), ball sucking, slapping, spit kink?, degradation, humiliation, name calling (slut, whore, bitch, sugar, good girl), daddy kink, some praise, spanking, pussy slapping (like once), safe word (yellow), vaginal sex, no prep anal, Bucky has a huge dick, choking, aftercare, check-ins, crying during sex, crying after sex, soft!Bucky, no mention of Y/N, no description of reader other than being female

Word Count: 4.3k of mostly smut

A/N: This was very self indulgent. Work has been kicking my ass and I want to be taken care of. Any mistakes are my own. If I missed any warnings please let me know. @bucknastysbabe it's done! I think I should go back to therapy. But hey, smut

You feel your throat tighten as you walk up to the apartment you share with Bucky. It was one of those days that left you beaten down and wanting to curl up under your blankets and cry. You didn’t even want to go into work this morning, having to force yourself to get ready. Too many rude customers, incompetent coworkers giving you more work than you get paid to do, everything leaving you overstimulated and wanting your boyfriend.

It left a craving deep down inside of you, a want that you knew only he could quell. You just wanted to shut your brain off, have Bucky take care of you, ruin you, treat you like a whore, break you down, just to put you back together again.

You swallow the lump in your throat and unlock the front door, finding Bucky on the couch watching some random action movie that he claimed to hate. At the sight of him your body naturally relaxes and the urge to crawl onto his lap is too much to bear.

“Hey, sugar. I’ve been missing you all day. You’ll never fucking believe the video Sam sent me of Tony trying out his new thrusters! He flew rig- What’s wrong?” He perked up at the sound of the door opening, truly missing his girl. Whenever you’re around him his entire day gets better, a lightness filling his chest, but when he sees how run down you are, his heart literally hurts for you. Bucky wants to protect you from everything, from supervillains all the way to spiders in the house.

“Long day, baby. Just wanna be with you.” He opens his arms and you instantly crawl into his lap, eyes burning with tears you refuse to shed. He runs his metal hand up and down your back, pulling you as close to him as possible, while his flesh hand rests on your head, holding you to his neck, letting you breathe him in.

“What can I do for you, sugar? Want to talk about it? I can order from your favorite place. Can run you a bath. Whatever you want, sweet girl.” 

“Please, be mean to me, Bucky.” Bucky feels his heart clench in his chest. He wants to keep your heart safe from whatever it is that is plaguing you, but he knows he can’t. What he can do is follow your request and make you forget.

“How mean do you want me, sugar?” Bucky has done this for you a few times. He always asks how you want him to treat you. It’s in his nature to be sweet to you, fill you with praise, but that's not what you want right now. You want to be degraded and treated like a fucktoy.

“Mean.” You keep your eyes trained on him. This is the only part where you need to keep your head on, make sure that he knows you want this.

“Remember your colors, sugar?” You nob, excitement bubbling up inside of you. “Remember, daddy will only be upset with you if you don’t use them. If you need to say yellow or red, you will.” His tone is final. This is the only way he would ever agree to treating you like a slut.

“Yes, daddy.” And just like that, Bucky’s entire demeanor changes. He goes from your sweet, cuddly boyfriend to a cold and callous body of muscle. 

“Then take your clothes off, slut.” He pushes you off his lap, just hard enough to give the illusion of indifference. As you strip, Bucky keeps his eyes trained on the TV, not paying you any mind. Your core throbs at the fact that you are completely exposed while he is still fully dressed. 

“On your knees.” He’s still not looking at you, but you obey without thought, willing to do whatever he wants. Grabbing the back of your neck, he forces you in between his spread legs, and you whine at the fact that his cock is still soft inside his sweats. Any other day, Bucky would make sure that your knees were never on the hardwood floor without a pillow or something soft underneath, but not today.

On days like these, when you want to feel completely submissive, it takes Bucky a while to get aroused. It’s in his nature to love up on you, make you drunk with pleasure in the sweetest way possible. He feeds off of your energy. When he is sure that you are having fun, his body lets himself fall into his role.

“What? You think at the first signs of some tits I’m gonna get hard? I knew you were a dumb slut but I didn’t realize just how thick you were.” Your pussy was absolutely pulsing with need. With his hand still on the back of your neck, he rubs your face against his crotch, feeling his cock begin to harden at the smell of your arousal.

He pulls you back far enough to slide his pants down, foregoing boxers, and you immediately try to take his half hard length in your mouth. Before you can process it, Bucky’s right hand lands a slap to your cheek - hard enough to make a welt that will take a few hours to disappear. You gasp and your cunt pulses even harder than before at the sting left on your cheek. 

His metal hand wraps around your chin, much cooler than it’s supposed to be, and forces you to look him in the eye. In the back of your mind you realize that he turned on the cooling function in his arm to sooth your cheek; the arm was built to keep him cool in the Wakandan sun and heat. “Did daddy say you could suck his cock?” He uses his hand to shake your head from side to side, answering for you. “Then keep your slutty mouth shut.”

He spreads his legs wider and pulls your face closer to his heavy sack, already full of cum. “Hands behind your back, and suck on daddy’s balls.” You join your hands together behind your back without question and nuzzle his balls. Wasting no time, you take one into your mouth, sucking feverishly, enjoying the light dusting of hair tickling your face.

“Oh, fuck, come on, slut, I know you can do better than that. Take ‘em both in your dirty mouth.” He pushes you further into him, cutting off your oxygen, and you swear you hear your slick drip onto the floor. Your jaw aches as you try to get them both in your mouth, but you can't; his balls are too big. Bucky ruts against your face, squishing his balls, precum leaking from his tip, dripping onto his stomach after he takes his shirt off.

With your limited amount of movement, you alternate between each ball, licking at the seam. Every time you switch balls, you feel the other drag wetly across your face and you have to clench your legs in an attempt to quell the ache between them while fighting with your need for air. “Such a dirty bitch, lapping at your daddy’s nuts, shit.” He pulls you back just as your head starts to go fuzzy from the lack of oxygen, and you gasp for air, spit is covering the lower half of your face and is dripping down your neck and chest; Bucky feels his cock throb at the sight.

Reaching out, Bucky smears your spit around your face and leaves another, weaker smack to your cheek before he grabs his cock and uses his weeping tip to tease you, dragging it on your face. “What a nasty fucking bitch, drooling all over the place just from sucking some balls.” He slaps your cheeks with it a few times before forcing your head down all the way, making you gag and you immediately pull off, coughing.

He stares into your eyes, cold and calculating, waiting for you to speak. When your coughing subsides you manage to get out a hoarse ‘green,’ giving him the all clear. He takes your head and once again makes you take his cock, this time much slower and not as deep, the first time he wanted to fuck with you. “Such a perfect fucking mouth, shit.” He stops you from bobbing your head, “Stop being such a desperate whore and let daddy finish his movie.” You're sure you’re leaking onto the floor at this point.

You are able to see his face and he looks wrecked, mouth hanging open and head back; he’s not watching shit. Nonetheless, you rest your head on his thigh, getting comfortable, spreading your legs out to get closer to the floor so your head won't be bent at an awkward angle, ignoring the pain in your knees and the ache in your jaw. 

The only sounds filling the room are Bucky’s ragged breathing and the movie playing in the background. There is saliva everywhere, his cock, all over his balls, down to his ass and on the couch. His cock is constantly leaking precum into your mouth but you don’t swallow, letting his taste linger on your tongue. 

This isn’t what you wanted, you wanted him to demolish you. Sitting with his cock in your mouth is giving you too much time to think, so you do what any sane person would do - be a brat. At the first suckle, Bucky lets out a broken moan, at the second, he knows what you’re up to. Flicking your ear with his metal hand he hisses, “Don’t make me punish you, bitch.” At the third, he yanks you off of his dick, a trail of drool and precum keeping the two of you connected, as slaps you once again with his flesh hand, this time not soothing the marred flesh with his metal hand.

He stands and kicks the couch out of the way and pulls you with him by the neck. “You disobedient little-” he cuts himself short at the small puddle of slick that he finds from your previous position. “Is that what I think it is?” You only whine in response, his grip on your neck never faltering. 

With his free hand, he reaches down to your pussy to feel just how wet you are, confirming his suspicions. “What a dirty fucking slut, leaking all over my floor.” He pulls you in closer to him just to whisper, “Lick it the fuck up, bitch,” before pushing you to the ground. 

Your knees hit the wood hard and pain runs up your spine. You ignore the ache and brainlessly lap at your juices on the floor before Bucky smushes your cheek against the puddle and you moan. “Messy bitch, you are? Cunt is pulsing, waiting for my dick. Too bad I have to punish you, isn’t it, slut?” He leans down to the floor, eyes lined up with yours. “Daddy is going to give you ten spanks and I want you to count them.” You don’t respond immediately, stuck in a sort of limbo, drawn in further at the softness in his eyes.

No matter how hard he tries, Bucky can’t hide his devotion to you, that’s why he doesn’t let you look at him when he needs to play this role. His whole face softens at your silence, fearing he’s gone too far. “Color, sugar.” Stroking your cheek, he leans in closer, breathing you in.

“Green, daddy, so green.” The sigh Bucky lets out is audible and he feels ten times lighter.

“Good girl, you want to keep going the way we were?” Even though you said green, he wants to be certain.

“Yes please, daddy, want you to be mean.” You look so small and soft. Bucky struggles to put his facade back up, but he knows you need this.

Bucky positions himself behind you, staring at your ass and glistening pussy, and feels his cock bounce. The first slap isn’t soft by any means, you know there will be a handprint left. Your body jolts and Bucky groans at the jiggle of your ass. “One.” The second is on your other cheek and makes you clench around nothing. “Two.” He lands the next two much harder on the same cheek and you feel tears form in your eyes, yet continue to count, digging your nails into your palm.

He repeats the two spanks to your left cheek and takes a break to sooth your heated and raised skin with his metal hand after you’ve counted. The ground beneath your cheek is hard and unforgiving, leaving you neck bent at an odd angle. Spank seven lands on the back of your right thigh and somehow feels much stronger. “Shit! Seven, daddy.” Eight is on your left, and is just as hard. Your entire lower body aches: cunt pulsing and throbbing for his cock, thighs burning, and ass red and raw, sobbing with every impact.

“These last two are going to be harder, slut, since you forgot to count.” Even with his warning, you aren’t prepared. They are hard and fast, hearing them before you feel them, knocking the breath out of you, and you try to scramble up, but Bucky holds you down. “Don’t run away from me, you know better.” All of a sudden, the sharpest and most excruciating pain blooms from your cunt, and then you hear the wet smack of his metal hand hitting your core. 

You wail, body shooting up, legs fighting to close to soothe the sting left. Before you can, Bucky’s hand on the back of your head keeps you to the ground, while he slams his cock into your cunt, not stopping to let you adjust. “That’s it, fuck. Such a good pussy. Dirty fucking bitch.” You can’t breathe, his cock is knocking all of the air out of your lungs. The only sounds in the room are Bucky’s moans and the wet slapping of skin, his heavy balls banging against your sore clit. With each thrust you’re sure he’s hitting your cervix.

The hand on the back of your head leaves to grab your hip, letting him fuck you even faster, the both of you sliding further and further on the floor. You try to brace yourself with your hands, but the brutality of his fucking is no match. “Daddy, fuck, s-so g-good, please!” You don’t know what you’re begging for, but your cunt is pulling him in, barely letting him pull out.

Bucky is practically chasing you on the floor, hips never slowing down, eyes trained on your pussy, loving the creamy white mess on his dick. “Fuuuck, look at the ass bouncing on daddy’s cock, shit! Love the way this fat fucking ass looks when its all red and sore.” He’s in heaven, with the tight clench of your cunt wrapping around his cock, making him feel crazy.

“Daddy! I can’t, f-fuck, please, too much!” You’re fucking delirious with pleasure, feeling something twisting inside of you. You searched for something to hold on to, only finding smooth surface, legs locking, body seizing up.

“You can and you will take this dick, bitch. I don’t care if it makes you fucking bleed.” The pressure in your core builds tighter and tighter, all the while, Bucky’s hips never falter, sack still ramming against your clit.The breath is knocked out of you when you feel the most intense orgasm of your life pass through you.

Keening and wailing, you squirt on Bucky’s cock, the sounds of your fucking somehow getting even more wet until the force of your orgasm pushes his cock out. Your body is left twitching. There is a much larger puddle on the floor now - your cum. Bucky could fucking cum at the sight of your pathetic body laying on the ground, body wrought with pleasure. “Fuck, sugar! That was so fucking hot! You squirted all over, shit! I fucking love you so goddamn much.” 

The entire lower half of his body is covered with your cum and Bucky swears he can feel his heartbeat in his cock. Nonetheless, he wraps his arms around your waist and hulls you over to where he kicked the couch, placing your upper half on the cushions. “You’re so fucking wet now I bet I could slide right into that tight ass, what do you think, slut?” Your core pulses at the thought of his fat cock in your ass, the two of you don’t usually do anal, given how big he is, but you can’t think straight, especially after cumming so hard.

“Yes, daddy. I want your big cock in my ass, want you to fill me up.” Bucky groans at the thought of his excessive load running out of your ass. Leaning back, he ruts against your pussy, gathering more of your slick, before spreading your cheeks with his hands, staring at your puckered hole. He lines his cock up and watches as precum leaks from his tip.

His cock is huge, much longer and thicker than average, and he knows it. Grabbing himself near his tip, he pushes, grunting at the resistance, knowing that this would be much easier if he takes the time to prep you, but you want to be treated like a whore. “You gotta loosen the fuck up, bitch or else I’ll really fucking hurt you. Want this fucking ass so bad, better let daddy in. Cock is too big for this little ass, isn’t it, gonna split you in half, leave you leaking for days.” 

He pushes harder, tip finally popping in, causing searing pain to shoot through you. Crying out, you try to pull forward to escape the burning pain, wiggling further into the couch. Bucky leans over, careful not to push in any further, he knows you need a moment, any other time you would have been fully prepped and he would have slid right in, and wraps his metal hand around your neck, shushing you, “Shhhh, stop being so dramatic.” 

After a few minutes, the pain begins to subside and your breathing calms down. Keeping his hand around your throat, he pushes in, inch by inch, and the pain comes back. You whine into the cushion, every new inch burning more than the last until his hips are flush with your ass. “What the fuck?! Your ass is so fu-fucking tight, shit! Fucking milking my cock, wanna pound this little hole, wanna fucking ruin you.”

Burying his face in the back of your neck, Bucky was taking deep breaths, completely out of it. He wasn’t thinking straight, not when your tight hole was hugging every inch of his cock. You on the other hand, were struggling, it was too much too fast. It fucking hurt, there were tears in your eyes, but your pussy was aching like it wanted more. Your clit throbbed with need, even when your ass was stretched to the brim.

You didn’t want to stop, but you needed a break, before Bucky could move his hips you muttered, “Yellow, daddy, yellow.” The hand on your neck left and Bucky maneuvered his upper body so that he could look you in the eye without moving his cock. His entire demeanor was different, back was your sweet, caring boyfriend. 

“Good girl, daddy’s so proud of you for using your safe word. Shhh, it’s okay, sugar. Do you just need a second to breathe? Take your time, if you need to stop I will.” Bucky caresses your face as he soothes you, bringing you back down. His cock is still buried to the hilt in your ass, driving him insane. He wants to rail you so fucking bad, tip of his cock probably purple by now, but he would never do anything you didn’t want to, more than willing to sit with his cock inside of you until you’re ready or decide to stop.

You don’t know how much time passes, but eventually, you loosen up and your mind goes fuzzy once again, desperate for him to move. You wiggle your hips, rocking back and forth, instead of pain, blinding pleasure courses through you. “Green, daddy. I’m ready, just needed to get used to your fat cock, want you to pound into me.” Bucky lets out the most sinful groan and stills your hips with his hands.

He starts out slow, easing you into his motions, gradually gaining speed and force the louder your moans get. “Daddy, faster, please, harder, feels so good!” You were practically sobbing, loving the way he was splitting you open. His hips and thighs were wet from when you squirted on him, slapping against your ass, everytime he pulled back a vulgar shlick sound could be heard.

He fucked you faster and harder, staring at where you were connected. “This fucking ass feels incredible. Taking me so well, knew you could do it, fuck. Splitting your tiny ass in half. Oh God!” He could feel his orgasm building up, fighting it off everytime his cum filled sack slapped against your pussy. Letting go of your hips he snarled, “Show daddy how much of a fucking slut you are and bounce that fat ass on his cock.”

You whined, but complied anyway, digging your toes into the floor to get more leverage to keep slamming back on his cock. The sounds of skin slapping and both of your moans completely drowned out the ending of Bucky’s movie, not that either of you cared. Panting and moaning, you kept working yourself on him, feeling another orgasm bubbling up.

Meeting your thrusts, Bucky was rambling, not having one coherent thought in his head, “Look at that, give me that ass, yes! Don’t you dare fucking stop, bitch, want you to milk this cock. Love the way it fucking bounces, never seen anything like it, oh fuck!” He was getting whiny, high pitched moans falling from his lips. He couldn’t help it, his cock was too fucking sensitive and you felt too good. 

“M Gonna cum, daddy! Can I cum?” Bucky practically growls, getting up to his feet to squat, not missing a beat while still trusting in you. Every time his pelvis met your ass he whined and whimpered, loving the way it jiggled. He could feel you clenching around him, drawing his own orgasm closer.

“Not until I do. Fucking hold it, bitch.” It seemed impossible, but Bucky fucked you even faster, his hips moving at a ferocious speed. He wanted to cum so fucking bad and your high pitched moans were about to make him bust. “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. I’m gonna fucking nut. You want daddy to fill your ass up, huh? God! Fuck, I’m splitting you in two. Uhhh. Balls are so heavy, so much cum. Fuuuuuuck. Daddy’s gonna fill you up, have you leaking.”

His hand wraps around your throat and chokes you, hips still smashing against yours, your orgasm barely being held in. You try to talk, get him to let you cum, but no words come out. Bucky felt his orgasm approach, balls pulling up, “Shiiit, daddy’s gonna cum, gonna flood your ass, you ready, cum with your daddy. Right. Fucking. Now.” Bucky cums with a long, drawn out moan. The feeling of his endless load pouring into your ass sends you over the edge and you cum so hard your vision goes black for a second. Waves upon waves of pleasure coursing through you. Bucky’s hips jerk involuntarily, prolonging both of your orgasms. 

As you both catch your breaths, you feel Bucky begin to soften inside of you, still plugging your hole, stopping his cum from leaking back out. “You were so good for me, sugar. I’m so proud of you.” At those words you feel your bottom lip begin to tremble. Burying your face into the cushions, a sob escapes your throat, all of your emotions finally bubbling over.

Running his hands up and down your back, Bucky soothes you. This was always his least favorite part, seeing you cry. He knows that you’re crying isn’t because of him, but there is always a twinge of fear that shoots through his body, scared that he went too far with you. Bucky pulls out as gently as he can, hissing when the air touches his spent dick, and moves to rest his back against the couch, pulling you into his lap.

Neither of you care that his cum is leaking all over. Bucky will clean the room later, after he takes care of his sweet girl. You cling to him as you sob into his neck, his hands massage your sore cheeks as he whispers in your ear, “Such a good girl for me, you made me feel so fucking good. Can’t even begin to explain how good you felt. There you go, let it out. I’m right here.”

Carefully, he picks you up and carries you to the bathroom. When he tries to set you down you just cling on harder to him, not wanting to leave his embrace. “I gotta draw us a bath, sugar. You know you have to pee, I’ll be right here when you’re done.” You hesitantly let him go while he draws the bath, putting in your favorite oils. After you pee and wipe, he helps you up so you can wash your hands before sitting you both in the tub.

Before the water gets cold you’ve stopped crying, making Bucky feel much better and he washes the sweat and spit off of your face and body, being extra careful with your sensitive pussy and ass. All the while whispering sweet nothings into your ear and kissing you all over your face.

Bucky feels ten times lighter when he gets a giggle out of you. He knows that there will be days when you need him to treat you like a slut, but you know how much he loves and respects you. He takes you to bed where you take turns feeding each other chocolate that he keeps stashed in the drawer next to the bed. You’re both asleep within the hour and any remnants of your day are long forgotten when you’re wrapped up in Bucky’s arms.

Natasha: I bet they're together

Steve: what who?

Natasha: Bucky and y/n

Steve: why do you think that

Natasha: just look at them

*y/n sitting in buckys lap braiding his hair*

Steve: y/n does that to thor

Natasha: ok but look how content bucky looks

*not paying attention to anything but y/n*

Tony: *walks in* what are you guys talking about

Steve: Natasha thinks y/n and bucky are together

Tony: hold on i got an idea...

Tony: hey y/n can I ask you a question

Y/n: yeah go ahead *still playing with buckys hair:

Tony: what do bees make

Y/n: honey?

Bucky: yeah,baby doll

Natasha: *smirks*

New idea for a fic!

You’re a civilian and Bucky need to use your apartment or house as a viewing hideout to spy on a suspect over the road. (Got this idea based on the new itv drama ‘viewpoint’ in the uk. Look it up for further understanding)

It can be fluff but I feel like there are many smut options available!

Anyone can write this if it inspired you! Just tag me in it.

Looking forward to reading them if you use it!

Are you wearing my shirt?

Navigation ⋅ Main Masterlist 

Prompt: "Are you wearing my shirt?"

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing:  Bucky Barnes x reader

Warning: None

Word Count: 450+

Copying, adapting, and plagiarism, whether in person or digitally, is totally prohibited. Please do not translate and use it as your own work.

Today was a bright and warm day in the tower. I could feel my partner's breath on my neck and his arm around my waist protectively. I started passing my fingers in the arm that was hugging me and tracing the veins that could be seen. After minutes of savoring his warmth, I decided to slowly remove his arm, so I could get out of bed. I stretched and made my way to the bathroom, so I could freshen up for the day. After finishing that routine, I put on my underwear, shorts, and one of that man's shirts.

I observed in great detail his face, how his chest rose and fell along with his breathing. I leaned in and kissed his forehead, then brushed his hair off his forehead. "You drive me crazy, Barnes…" I smiled at that thought before leaving the room and heading to the kitchen to make breakfast for everyone. A few minutes later, I heard feet shuffling on the floor and strong arms around my waist.

- Good morning, doll... - Said that man with a hoarse voice full of sleep. I smiled and turned in his arms, passing mine around his neck. - Good morning, handsome, did you sleep well? - He nodded answering my question before placing his forehead in mine. I laughed softly, seeing how he was still half asleep, and caressed the back of his neck.

- I must continue cooking, soon everyone will come hungry, and you know how they get. - I stand on tiptoes and gently kiss his lips. He nodded again as he pulled me closer following the kiss. We pulled away from lack of air, and he rubbed my waist before dropping his arms and walking to the chairs, so he could see me.

I returned to my original position to continue cutting vegetables while I felt that man's gaze on me. Once I put the eggs in the pan, I could only laugh a little at what he said.

- Are you wearing my shirt? - I didn't have to turn around to know he was smirking, I nodded before turning around and starting to pose as a model. - You like it, right? I think this shirt suits me better than you. - I listened to his melodious laugh before approaching him quickly.

- It looks spectacular on you, doll. - He said affectionately, bringing his hands to my waist before kissing my cheek. - Oh, you don't have to tell me, I already knew that. - I winked at him before going back to the kitchen to finish cooking, still hearing his laugh ringing throughout the kitchen. And so it continued throughout the day, me modeling his shirt and he was flattering me. I loved days like this with my favorite soldier.