Journaling - Tumblr Posts - Page 2

❀ Pansy n°1 = F*cking writer’s block.

I really enjoy writing.

Like a lot.

I think it’s because I have a lot on my mind and I thrive to get it out of my head. Like I don’t want to lose the ideas I have so I try to write as much as I can somewhere, everywhere. I literally have a note on my phone titled ‘Story ideas’ , and up to this date (the time I’m writing this) I collected twelve ideas without counting this book, or whatever this is. I have some ideas that are way more developed than others and some that are just fun things I thought about, but I feel like I could do so much with each of them. And I want, I really want to use all those amazing ideas and make them into the novels they deserve to be, but sadly… It always ends the same.

You see, dear reader, there is some sort of pattern that seems to come back in my life as a wannabe writer. Most of the time it starts with me having a dream or a daydream about whatever came to my mind this day. Then I realize that I really like what I’m imagining, that it’s actually really interesting and maybe it could grow into something more. So I continue to think about it for days, weeks, months, sometimes years and I end up with a full on story of ten novels and even a sequel (I may exaggerate a bit, but only a bit). And here I am, attached to this universe I created, to these characters I watched growing up and all the important events of their adventures I want everyone to know about, and I’ll be heartbroken to just leave it at that. To just leave it as a simple fantasy, a dream, a figment of my subconscious. I cannot possibly let it be forgotten, because I’ll inevitably forget it if I do not act and do something to keep it somewhere, anywhere. So comes the time to write, to finally put into words this story, this scenario that was entirely made up by myself and my creative mind.

Yet, when I finally have the motivation to write something, anything, this so-called motivation never comes alone. It always comes with it. You might be confused as to who or what I’m talking about dear reader. Well, I am talking about this horrible realization that writing is difficult as f*ck.

In fact, I always end up being lost in all the details of my stories. I always end up realizing that I thought of things, but not everything, and that I have now to choose the right words, the right grammar, the right phrasing to accurately depict the world, the characters and the adventures I have created. And this dear reader is so very hard.

Then I also have to think about all that’s in between the big events of the story to tone down the dose of action in the script, to show the character development, to exploit the characters' relationships and make the readers like them as well as relate to them. At this point, writing seems like a chore, a big task that is too hard for me to actually be able to finish.

Admitting that I actually started something and didn’t give up just messily writing down notes on a random notebook, I never seem to end up writing things that I like. Writing becomes stress inducing because I constantly think about what I have to write down after this exact moment for it to make sense and how I have to make some details pop out but not too obvious for the reader to notice them but not understand their importance. All in all my thoughts, ideas and anxiety create this jumbled mess in my head and I am incapable of writing.

To this date I have three started and unfinished projects. One that I started when I was like 12 or 13 and actually finished (well at least the first book or season because it was written as a screenplay) after having started at least four or five different versions of it. But as time flew by I ended up hating what I wrote so I decided to start it all over again this time as a novel. Yet I didn’t get far because I started questioning the originality and interest of this story that was in fact kind of childish. It was very important to me because it was the first ever thing I wrote down and I loved it dearly, but I inevitably left it aside.

Then much later I started thinking of this thriller based on a nightmare I had. So with one of my sisters we wrote everything down about the plot, the characters, the universe, etc… I even started writing but I never went past the first chapter. I was just unable to. I wanted to, really, because it has a lot of potential and I wanted it done but I dreaded writing about it because I couldn’t come up with correct phrasing and ideas of filler chapters. I was also so far ahead in my mind, already thinking of what could happen in the second book of this saga. I’m always thinking too far, too fast. So I have a second draft lying around on my computer.

Finally, recently I decided that I wanted to truly finish a book, that I was going to do it, and in order to do just that I thought of a simple love story which could fit in a tiny and single book. Like that no thinking ahead and finishing with ideas for an infinite number of books. So I took notes of ideas as they came, created the characters and found their visuals, all of that in a very short amount of time and I loved doing it. I was thrilled! It felt good to be able to do things so fast and smoothly. Then I started writing, it went well, I was inspired and I liked how I wrote, but came chapter 7 and I stopped completely because I was once again starting to complicate the task at hand. I was either distracted or not inspired or just lazy. So I stopped and a third unfinished draft joined my computer.

Whenever I want I could go back to either of those drafts and continue them, because deep down I know I am capable of doing it, of writing but I can’t seem to do so. I am just stuck with overflowing ideas but the incapability of fully writing things down. It s*cks… And it makes me feel incapable.

So I just have one thing to say: f*ck writer’s block.

✿❀✿

🔺Original work, please do not steal or copy. Thanks.🔺

- notify me if there are typos ;)

Therian journalling prompts/ideas

make up or learn a secret cypher (i use an altered version of greenrune), find the coolest looking journal you can or make one yourself, and write everything you want, your secrets, your dreams, your therian experiences all without having to worry someone will read it. seriously. it's incredibly freeing!

doodle and describe how you feel yourself. a human? an animal? a mix? do you see an animal on two paws, or perhaps a human on all fours? get as creative with this as you want

make a scrapbooking spread. make it messy or neat, all to your preferences. add everything you possibly can think of in there that reminds you of your kintype, be it dried plants, colored paper, pictures of nature, or maybe even scraps of fabric. draw the paw/feet/similar identifying trait of your theriotype over it all. make it yours

do you have any gear, or want any? why or why not? delve into that thought, and see where your mind takes you. it's always alright to get off track

dedicate a page or two to your theriotype(s), with information you know, things that remind you of them, perhaps add images or drawing of the, as well.

what was the best/most fun shift you've ever had? why? what caused it? try to replicate it and see how it goes!

do you like to/want to do quads? make a tracker for what days you try, and keep notes of what you do well and what you need to practice more!

in similar suit, track your shifts, along with what kind of shift it was, what animal you were, what you believe triggered it, and how long it lasted. it can help you learn more about what kind of shifts are typical for you, and predict shifts a little more

territory. do you have any? do you remember any from animalistic memories? would you like some? plan ahead! scout out areas nearby, print pictures of it, and draw over areas you'd like to create. think that mound might look nice with a den right next to it? want to have a quads obstacle course? maybe an area where you can sit and do homework or relax? note all the ideas down, plan how you'll mark your territory, and draw any elaborate plans you may have!

list a few meal ideas for yourself that work with your theriotypes! if you make them, write about how they tasted!

Feel free to suggest more ideas!

misting the pages of my journal with my own cologne as if it’s a love letter i’m sending to my husband at war and i want him to remember what i smell like

(i’m my own husband in this scenario)