Player: I Just Chugged A Bottle Of NyQuil Thinking It Was DayQuil So To Fix It, I Also Drank An Entire

Player: I just chugged a bottle of NyQuil thinking it was DayQuil so to fix it, I also drank an entire monster.

Carmen: ... is your heart okay?

made a character opinion bingo

Me: *organizes a fic playlist by chronological order of events*

Literally anyone: Oh my god... they're insane...

Carmen Sandiego gets a hundred percent funnier if you remember that Player has directly heard the VAST majority of Carmen's on-heist interactions (if you don't believe me, just pay attention to the way he talks after an event. Example: "You were kind of... direct", after her lecture in Dubai implies that he heard the fight)

Carmen: you aren't really dressed for the occasion... but we'll make it work ;)

Player, spitting out his drink: CARMEN-

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Player: DID YOU JUST THROW A SHOE AT DEVINEAUX??

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Player: Carmen I swear to God if you jump off of that building-

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Carmen: when are you going to stop acting like amateurs!?

Player, casually turning the sound on his computer allll the way down: let's just ignore that :))) everything's fine!!

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Player, hearing his best friend get her bones SNAPPED in a death hug: ...

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Carmen: YOU OWE ME A NEW HAT!

Player: YEAH!

I think one of the most damaging ideologies towards children is the conviction that having children isn’t a calling but a moral obligation.

New Favorite Whump Trope

Character A is mostly innocent, but has been tied/chained up for whatever reason (betrayal, a dangerous emotional outburst, etc). This means when the monsters start approaching, they have to plead for Character B to let them go before they're caught/killed.

Bonus if B does attempt to rescue A, but ends up having to run, effectively condemning A to death/capture.