Dimentio-fan - Damn It I Can't Get The Joke Completely In Here - Tumblr Blog

... is this a troll or did the link change, I got kriffing rickrolled.

I checked the link then fell for it AGAIN. So I'm going to say that that lines up with forgiving too easily. Yeah. That checks out. Anyway, if the link ever fixes itself, open tag!

TAKE THIS TEST TO SEE YOUR BIGGEST WEAKNESS

Say what you got then tag some people

It says that I’m gullible…

@sushi1056 @the-real-gmail @definitelygoodwill @same-pic-of-rickroll-everyday

I found this on a long chain, but I wasn't tagged and kind of want to start my own chain with it. Also, I've never seen this tag before. To be fair, I've only read Star Wars and Gravity Falls books on AO3. And Sonic the Hedgehog. Holy shit I still love the Roboticization Theory.

Also, um... accurate. Holy shit I was not expecting to get called out.

...

So coming back to this after an identity crisis-

This is not as accurate as I thought when I got this result-

It's my 1 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

WOW Time flies, I didn't know about this until just now, It's 2 AM after 12 hours of hard focus, I am in PaIN and don't have the capacity to say shit about this. But this is cool, I guess.

:)

This is too fitting. My sleep schedule is atrocious, I'm an absolute gremlin, and Star Wars has me in a chokehold. Oh, and my previous Fandom that I still interact with was Sonic and Mario. So this all fits!

screenshot to see ur nickname!

It's 4:30 am and a bat found its way into our house. I'm naming it Joker.

I am reblogging this because this is amazing and I don't want to lose it, Force this is amazing!

At the gate for my flight home from visiting friends and there's a woman here with a service Shiba Inu. No pics because he has a Do Not Disturb vest and taking pics of strangers is illegal but I need to stress how ON DUTY this animal is. Ears up. Eyes doing Lazer scans of everything. Examining everyone who passes within 10ft like a security guard. Ass planted on her feet. I have never seen a dog with such intense chivalric guardian energy before. He has tiny eyebrows and they are FURROWED with concentration.

I don't know when this was uploaded, but yeah, stay safe! We went through a bad storm a week or two ago, if that's what this is about then my bad!

⚠️IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT⚠️

There's a hurricane heading here where I live. It's a category 2 and we're on Orange Alert already, which means that is near, but hasn't touched land yet. My family and I have already taken appropriate prevention measures and stocked up with enough supplies. The hurricane is supposed to pass through here around 7:00PM and should be leaving around tomorrow noon.

I'm telling you this in case you don't hear about me around that time. I'll be saving my phone's battery in case of emergency. I'll keep you updated if I get the chance, and I'll make sure to let you know when it's over.

In case any of you is currently in the zones that will be affected by Beryl hurricane, stay safe.

My creature is an Angel of Death, taking some inspiration from the literal embodiment of the Dark Side in Star Wars. He is just called The Son, although The Daughter (Embodiment of the Light Side) is confirmed to be named Ashla. Just a fun fact.

Oh, don't question the state of my IRL character, I haven't felt fully rested since 5th grade.

Picrew Tag Game :D

Use This Picrew -> ✨✨✨

Make you irl

Then make you as a mythical animal

Have fun!

Me irl and me as mushroom :3

@larz-barz @hotelcaliforniaenbydancer @muichirotokito-122 @cherry-bomb-xoy @your-local-demon-slayer-nerd @vinjiko-kny @local-giyuu-simp @vampp4 @kitkat-moon @kimetsu-chan

I think that the voice working is great! The voice is interchangeable, and for all we know, it's not his real voice, just a magic filter! Which basically means that we can have Super Dimentio saying that one line... what was it again?

"You 2 stay right there! **I HAVE SOME CHILDREN TO MAKE INTO CORPSES!**

Because as far as Dimentio is concerned, everyone who is actually fighting him are children, and the few who aren't are getting sent off to Dimension D! It's perfect!

Showing off my Toonsquid Dimentio rig! Audio is from Gravity Falls!

The rig was made tracing an official graphic from the game, but was properly made and animated by yours truly!

@give-me-one-good-reason

@jell-o101

@papermariogirl257

You have no idea how much I needed to see that quote. I DO want to try Truffle Oil & Parmasan Toast IRL tho. That sounds good.

Uhh... I don't know who to tag, so I'm going to say Open Tag.

thank you for the tags @b00ks1ut and @mstiemountainhop

Toast quiz!!

You're not wrong

Tags!! @yourfavouritefighter @theweirdgoodbyes @ithinkabouttzu @1waveshortofashipwreck @montied @dontirrigateme @ronsenthal

Update: One of them was injured and the other I didn't bring home. The uninjured one I DID bring inside died. Don't know how the injured one is doing, they aren't supposed to have a lot of human interaction.

Update 2: The injured one died the same night. We had a funeral.

May 13th, 2024.

I was outside with my dog and I saw a Leverett under our lawn chair. The dog lunged towards it, I held her back, and chased the Leverett out of the dog's range (chased by accident, but it works) and I managed to pick it up and set it down in the meadow across the street. I go over to my mom, who just came out, and I tell her what happened. I look over and the dog is lunging at something in the grass. I could FEEL myself pale as I whisper-yell "Oh shit!" And sprint at the dog, finding a long line of saliva on her mouth and another Leverett in the grass, this one wet from the dog's spit. I rush it inside, and I tell my parents what happened, almost forgetting about the dog in my worry. I'm calming down after seeing my dad warm the baby rabbit up, and then I hear a squeaking noise. There was a third Leverett outside and this one was injured and screaming. I almost broke the screen door because I couldn't find the lock mechanism and the back door was closer to the little rabbit. I found the lock, rushed outside, saved the third Leverett and brought it in, then rushed back outside and brought the dog in, locking her in the little room off the side of the house before giving her her food and water bowl. After confirming that the baby rabbits were alive and somewhat stable (one of them was bleeding), I went out with the dog because she gets really worried about us. I know she wasn't really a bad dog, she doesn't know how to handle little animals, but I felt like I needed to post this because mama instincts just kicked in and I've never felt that before and now I'm overwhelmed and luckily dinner is almost ready. But Force this whole mess scared the life out of me.

May 13th, 2024.

I was outside with my dog and I saw a Leverett under our lawn chair. The dog lunged towards it, I held her back, and chased the Leverett out of the dog's range (chased by accident, but it works) and I managed to pick it up and set it down in the meadow across the street. I go over to my mom, who just came out, and I tell her what happened. I look over and the dog is lunging at something in the grass. I could FEEL myself pale as I whisper-yell "Oh shit!" And sprint at the dog, finding a long line of saliva on her mouth and another Leverett in the grass, this one wet from the dog's spit. I rush it inside, and I tell my parents what happened, almost forgetting about the dog in my worry. I'm calming down after seeing my dad warm the baby rabbit up, and then I hear a squeaking noise. There was a third Leverett outside and this one was injured and screaming. I almost broke the screen door because I couldn't find the lock mechanism and the back door was closer to the little rabbit. I found the lock, rushed outside, saved the third Leverett and brought it in, then rushed back outside and brought the dog in, locking her in the little room off the side of the house before giving her her food and water bowl. After confirming that the baby rabbits were alive and somewhat stable (one of them was bleeding), I went out with the dog because she gets really worried about us. I know she wasn't really a bad dog, she doesn't know how to handle little animals, but I felt like I needed to post this because mama instincts just kicked in and I've never felt that before and now I'm overwhelmed and luckily dinner is almost ready. But Force this whole mess scared the life out of me.

Let me make a whole script for this, please.

R, C, and S to make this easier.

R: Alright, for the last time, we are watching the Barbie movie. Slammer, if you can sit quietly throughout the whole movie, you can consume some of the arcade games. Contaminated, if you can sit still and **not infect the people around you** through the movie... I'll let you mess around at the park across the street.

S: I wanna go in the butter... it's warm and goopy...

R: ... uh... no... I'll get you a popcorn bowl of butter, okay?

C: We saw a dog in the theater...

[C looks at R]

C: Why is there a dog in the theater?

R: Its probably a service dog, don't think too hard about it.

[C looks back at the dog, staring for a few seconds.]

C: ... We wanna infect it.

R: NO!

S: Where's the butter?

R: Y'know what? Forget this, we'll watch it on a streaming service, assuming there are any left.

S: Nuuuuuuu.....

C: So... can we infect the dog?

R: WHY ARE YOU SO OBSESSED WITH INFECTING A DOG!?

C: It's easier than anthropomorphic beings.

R: ... that makes too much sense for my liking.

[They leave the theater]

When you’re the only au with themes of a virus/ illness that’s at least somewhat normal

Slammer Sonic: @space-cores-adventures

Recovery Sonic: @misscloudiedays

LMAO

Given that the Jungle Kingdom is the origin place of the karts, Sarasaland should be the kingdom known for its parties, complete with life-sized board games

Ooh! I like what you're getting at. I like to imagine a Sarasaland Party is like a dangerous Chuck-E-Cheese for adults. To the left they're playing a game of Bouncy-Brawl, Hot Bob-Omb, and Hop or Pop. To the right they're playing Winner or Dinner, Chain Chomp Fever, and Magma Mayhem. Near the front of house you can play Spring Fling, Pinball Fall, or Bullet Bill Bullies.

The location of the event and lineup of games changes every time a party is thrown, but there is always an open bar, and it's not unusual that half of the partygoers are hospitalized by the time the night's over.

Yeah, but they don't judge you for it. Instead, they see when you are broken and do what they have seen helps. If you are feeling hurt, then they will smell your distress and comfort you with their presence and purrs. This is why they come to help when you feel upset over something, they can smell the difference in your body and do the only thing they know of that works. It's adorable.

I know you were joking, but at the same time that is one of those jokes that while it will never BE true, it can be something that FEELS true at some points, and I don't want people to feel that way about themselves. I know your cats and dogs and other pets don't feel that way about you.

I probably should have mentioned going on some mini-hiatuses at one point, but I didn't know I was going on them until just now. Giving y'all these and then probably dipping again. Personal life.

🔪 knife stop 🔪

Take a knife or two to complete any tasks you need to finish soon. Reblog to give your mutuals a knife for any group projects you may be working on

You all know who I was hoping for, but I think what really makes a character likeable to me is them having the traits that I want but don't have. I am the definition of "just another schmuck on the road", and I am sick of it, but I'm so afraid of failure that I don't even TRY. And I hate it, but...

take this random quiz i made

also i didnt Put AAAALLL of the characters, theres like, i dont know how many of them.

reblog and show your results.

..if you want you couuld draw your oc/sona in clothes that are based on the villain you got as result, i mean, i cant stop you if you want or not

I know this isn't open-tag, but I got a notification and I wanna participate.

Sounds about right. :)

Thanks for the tag @thelastplantagenet 😊💚

1. Do this uquiz.

2. Do this picrew.

3. Tag people.

feel free to play if you’d like :)

@buncha-angry-kids-with-no-money @thatoneandlonelyemo2005 @with-the-words-all-wrong

YAY!

Happy 1st Anniversary Mario bros movie 2023

5th april

((YESSSS HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!))

I know I'm late, but let me ruin this, please!

So... spoilers for For Your Entertainment by Snugglyrabbits (NOT for the faint of heart)

So, we know that Princess Peach got starved and then fed a poisoned cake, right? So... I remember specifically a chat that I had with @give-me-one-good-reason where we were talking about how to fuck that up MORE, and it basically went along the lines of this:

So Luigi and Peasely think that things might finally be over after not receiving a tape for a while. They are back at their old house and sleeping in their old bed, and everything is fine. Until it starts to smell. They try and find the source of the smell and figure out that it's coming from under the bed, and then they find Peach's corpse with the tape of her death.

Now. How does this ruin the post above?

Peach always bakes cakes. Now she IS one! :)

I need some context to this specific image.

Either he put something in that meat and Luigi found out or that ain't meat he's meant to consume.

He’s just being fed a pastry and Luigi is being picky. That is all 😌

I DID IT!

You can only reblog this today.

:)

I'm going to be honest, I completely forgot about this headcannon. I've been hyperfocused on sonic lately. Thanks!

Okay, I forgot if I've mentioned this idea, I don't think so.

I have seen this idea going around that Floro Sprout roots are red. Blood red. This has inspired a new headcannon.

TW: Mentions of blood loss, brain death, possibly decay.

So, the floro sprout roots looks blood red because they are stained with actual blood, like how normal plant roots look weirdly water-stained. Now, where does this blood come from?

The part(s) of the brain that control conscious thoughts, free will, and emotion.

But what happens with a human circulatory system which connects the entire bloodstream together, now includes the Floro Sprout itself?

The human body gets slowly drained of blood while the Sprout feeds.

This means that the Sprout will take blood from the body, starting with the brain, and as more parts of the body die from lack of oxygen (blood carries oxygen around the body), the Sprout starts impacting the actual brain, making IT die as well.

Now, if, say... this Sprout were magically modified, then it could keep the body moving long after death, allowing for a fun little puppet that is completely dependant on the thing that is killing it.

I wish you luck, Luigi...

🌱

This headcannon was partially inspired by a Pokémon RP of Luigi, where a bird pecks his head and reveals a dead Floro Sprout stuck to his brain, blood dripping from the roots.

Holy shit I almost forgot about that book, I am ASHAMED of myself. Thank you for sending me into a giggling mess, though!

The One To Blame (part 2)

A followup to my The One To Blame one shot. I took a poll asking if I should keep things lighthearted, but "hurt that plumber harder" won, so....

Content Warning: Blood, torture, vomiting, graphic descriptions of violence.

Needless to say things get a little rough, so I totally get anyone that wants to dip out or hold off until part three (i.e, the comfort part of this hurt/comfort fic.)

____________________

Luigi knew that he had put a fire flower in his pocket some time ago. Chances were it got smashed at some point between then and now, so he was unsure if it would still work. Even if it did, there was little good it could do against a monster that breathed flames that easily outmatched the heat of any powerup. But it was all he had. A useless powerup was better than no powerup at all, if only he could move his arms and reach for it.

Bowser's grip remained firm as he tromped through the halls of his castle, the troops that Luigi had so skillfully evaded just earlier clearing the way. Some who saw the man dangling helplessly in Bowser’s fist took on a look of sadistic smugness. Others didn’t care at all, wanting nothing more than stay out of the way of their king as he rushed past them, up a flight of steps, and into uppermost room of a fortified tower, where he shut the door behind him.

The dark cell was empty save for some old broken chains attached to the wall, suggesting that the cramped quarters had once served as a prison of sorts before being abandoned altogether. Bowser lit overhanging lamps with a puff of flames, filling the claustrophobic space with a dull orange light. “Beg.” The demand was spoken between clenched teeth uncomfortably close to Luigi’s face, acrid breath burning against his cheek like hot steam. “Come on, I know you can do it. I’ve heard it before.” Bowser shifted Luigi in his fist, curling the tips of his claws into his chest, stomach, and thigh. “Beg.” The sensation of talons slowly digging caused Luigi’s breath to hitch. “Don’t! don’t– it hurts! Stop! Please!!”

The mounting pressure didn’t cease. He felt his clothing tear and skin gave way soon after. He screamed, straining to remember the conversation he had overheard earlier, sputtering to find something that would soothe Bowser’s wounded ego. “You’re right! You’re right! You’re right! I should've never touched that warp pipe! I shouldn’t have come to this world! It was a mistake!” The claws stopped digging. The hold loosened slightly, his claws freeing themselves from the shallow puncture wounds they had created. Luigi felt what he knew to be blood soaking into his torn clothes, splotches of red spreading across his collared shirt and denim overalls. “I shouldn’t have talked to you like that when we first met.” He added with a sob, “I-... I’m sorry… your… majesty?” The respectful title felt sour on his tongue, his stomach twisting with shame even as the suffocating grip continued to soften, and Bowser’s look of rage became a self-satisfied smile. “That’s better.” Luigi took the opportunity to once again try to reach for the fire flower in his pocket, but Bowser– feeling him struggling– once more tightened his grip while his free hand reached over to squish the man’s face between his thumb and forefinger.

“You know… Princess Peach was so eager to ruin our wedding trying to save you…”

“Not just me! She was trying to save the Kongs too!” Luigi tried to argue, though with his cheeks painfully pressed in the koopa’s grip it came out as “Nuff jush meh! shewesh tine ta sefta konds tuh!” Bowser paid little attention, and continued… “... I wonder if that would be the proper wedding gift? I’ll let her keep you, just so long as she follows through with her marriage vows.”

When Luigi’s face was finally released he racked his mind for the next thing to say. The right thing to say. Suddenly, his mouth moved before his brain could form a plan, and all at once he found himself speaking from the heart. “Why can’t you just leave her alone?!”

The volume was soft, but the tone was sharp. Bowser responded with equal impulsivity, rearing back and flinging his captive into the wall. “Why!? I’m King of The Koopas! And what are you!?” Luigi had just enough time to adjust his body so that his back took the brunt of the impact instead of his skull, saving him from being immediately knocked out. Rolling to the ground, he heard the tyrant continue...

“You… the stupid underling of an undersized nobody! You’re going to wish I never stooped so low as to ask for your name!” Luigi braced his body up on an arm and dug his hand into his pocket. The fire flower was still there, slightly smashed but radiating warmth. As soon as he grabbed it he felt its energy coursing through him, offsetting the pain of his injuries enough to let him climb to his feet.

Bowser, seeing the powerup activate, charged his captive like a bull, horns positioned to run him through. Luigi met the attack with a flash of bright green flame intended to do nothing more than disorient, and in that he was successful. Bowser was lost for a second of blindness, barreling into the wall as Luigi dove out of the way. Evading the flying debris he scampered toward the door they’d come through. It was heavy, but it had been blessedly left unlocked, and as soon as he wrenched it open he slipped through and ran as fast as his legs could carry him. _____

The sound of stone shattering reverberated through the castle. Peach heard the rumble. Her heart stilled, and her grip on the bars of her cage tightened. “Kamek!” she called, turning her desperation toward the magikoopa guarding her. “Please, you have to stop him!” “With all due respect Princess, until you become the queen of The Dark Lands I don’t take orders from anyone except His Highness.” “I just want Luigi safe! I’ll agree to anything if you’ll only–!” “Even if I believed you… which I don’t…” Kamek interrupted, placing hand on his cheek, recalling the punch that knocked him unconscious the last time Peach agreed to wed, “... once he gets this angry, there is nothing even I can do to stop him.”

Peach opened her mouth to respond, when a flash of red appeared in the corner of her eye. She and Kamek turned in unison to see Mario appear in the entrance of the throneroom, charging toward them at top speed with a look of unshakable determination on his face. He was not nearly quick enough. Kamek, with ample time to draw his wand, cast his spell, and before his would-be attacker was even halfway across the room he was encased in a field of blue magic. “Hee hee hee! Cocky, aren’t we?” Kamek cackled. The captured plumber replied with nothing but a frustrated grunt, gritting his teeth as he was lifted in the air. “No!” Peach shouted. She threw herself against the bars in frantic desperation, but they did nothing but clang noisily under her efforts. Kamek barely even spared her a glance, his attention fixed firmly on his prize. “That’s two plumbers I’ve caught in one night! Although… I believe Lord Bowser’s orders regarding you were to ‘kill on sight.’” With that, he intensified the spell with a twirl of his wand, certain that the sordid affair would be over in seconds. But then, Mario’s body– or what he thought to be Mario’s body– crumbled in a very unusual way. There was no blood or breakage, but instead the little man fell apart like a dry sand castle, disappearing into the air as a fine powder. Kamek stood for a moment in stunned silence. Wand still outstretched he stared at the empty air in utter befuddlement, noticing all too late when Mario appeared once more, emerging from his hiding place behind Bowser’s throne. Armed with a hammer, he leapt down the steps leading up to the throne with a single bound, and swung. The magikoopa was downed with a single blow that sent him flying across the room, slamming into the base of one of his king's many statues. There he lay slumped and still, his cracked glasses sitting crooked on his face.

Princess Peach beamed with joy and relief. “Mario!” "Princess!" Mario rushed to her side. Before she could ask anything else he hurriedly confirmed her suspicions as he pulled a ring of keys from his back pocket. “I had a spare double cherry. Toad is busy getting us an escape vehicle, so I provided my own backup. Now hold on, I’ll get you out of here...” “No! Mario, wait!” She reached through the bars, took the plumber by the wrist and slipped the key ring out of his hand. “It’s Luigi! Bowser, he- it’s all my fault! I–” She bit down on her lower lip, cutting herself off. No. Now was not the time for panicked confessions. Not a second could be wasted wallowing in guilt. In an instant she collected herself and tried again. “Bowser took your brother! I heard a crash coming from the westmost tower. I think that’s where they went. You have to go. Now.” "Luigi?" A troubled look flashed across Mario's face. He nodded, but conflict shone bright in his blue eyes as he slowly backed away. Worry for his brother demanded he hurry, but concern for Peach stilled him. What if the key she needed wasn’t on the ring? What if Kamek regained consciousness? What if someone else caught her trying to escape? Perhaps he should try hitting the door to her cage with the hammer... would that be faster? Would that draw too much attention? “Go on,” Peach urged, jangling the keys in her hands, “I won’t be too far behind, I promise!”

Again, Mario nodded, this time with greater determination. "Please, be careful!" With that, he turned and sped out of the throne room, leaving the princess to sort through the dozens of keys in search of one that could unlock her cell.

_____ Bowser pulled his head from the wall and shook the rubble from his horns as his fiery red eyes glanced about the room, quickly finding the ajar door and the speckled trail of blood leading out of it.

He let out a grunt of annoyance, but he felt little more than that. Luigi hadn’t gotten far, he could still smell the man’s open wounds. Even before Bowser exited the cell he could already sense that Luigi had gone up the stairs to the battlements rather than down them toward the main corridors, probably preferring to try and find an escape route along the castle rooftops rather than risk the crowded halls down below in his injured state.

A risky choice. A stupid choice. There was nowhere to hide up there. Outside, thundering clouds of ash blacked out the sky, robbing the land of any semblance of sunlight. The world was lit solely by the molten rock that flowed about the castle’s base and the golden embers that floated about the air– burnt remnants of what little managed to grow in this accursed land.

Luigi, trying to ignore the oppressive heat, ran along the tops of the castle wall, one hand over his wounded stomach, the other putting pressure on his injured thigh. Thankfully no organ or artery had been punctured as far as he could tell, but at this rate moving too recklessly would sap him of strength before he found a place to hunker down and rest– some secluded archway or tucked away window sill, where he could settle his heartbeat, and tend his wounds. He didn't make it far before heard Bowser’s thundering footsteps fast approaching, his predatory silence far more frightening than any taunt or threat. But while the koopa was fast– far faster than any human– what he had in speed Luigi matched in agility, even in his injured state. Turning toward his pursuer, Luigi shielded himself behind another burst of green flame. He dove beneath Bowser’s legs and weaved about his flicking tail, taking advantage of every tiny gap and blindspot like a skittering insect, aiming flashes of fire at the koopa's eyes until finally Bowser– at the end of his already limited patience– tucked himself completely into his shell, and spun. “Whirling Fortress” was the name of the maneuver. He rarely ever used it, in most cases it was overkill, and if Luigi hadn’t had a powerup to absorb the blow no doubt the spikes would’ve done far more harm than sending him flying into the parapet. But it did the trick, disempowering and disorienting the green plumber enough for Bowser to once more take hold of him, and this time he intended to take full advantage of his position.

After pinning Luigi to the ground with one hand, Bowser grabbed the calf of his uninjured leg with the other, and twisted it all the way around like a ragdoll. A pained screech filled the scorching air as joints of Luigi's knee, hip, and ankle snapped. The scream rose in volume and pitch as bone shattered soon after, until at last his leg was left twisted in a ghoulish, unnatural position. Bowser, satisfied, released his hold to let the mangled limb fall limp to the stone floor. “There. No more running away. No more hiding.” Luigi quivered from the shock, wide eyed and whimpering incoherently, but as pathetic as he looked, Bowser was surprised he had maintained consciousness. His vague sense of being impressed quickly turned into disgust, however, when then whimpering became retching, and Luigi poured the contents of his stomach onto the ground. “Look at you…” Bowser grumbled. He took hold of the back of Luigi’s head and smeared it against the mess he had made like he was disciplining an animal. “You can’t even take a little pain without losing all of your dignity.” “P-please.” Luigi sputtered, unaware that this time begging would merely trigger a fresh flash of rage. The grip on the back of his skull tightened, claws digging into his scalp as his face was brought back down against the bile-smeared stone with staggering force.

His nose was first to give way, his breathing immediately clogged with blood and a new, searing pain that reached behind his eyes. When he felt his head yanked back for a second blow he struggled to turn his face to save the nose from further damage. This resulted in his jaw and cheek taking the brunt of the impact. He barely succeeded in spitting out broken teeth before the third impact stole his will to struggle, and the fourth plunged him into darkness. The pain continued in unconsciousness, shockwaves of agony rippling out into every part of his body. Seconds felt like hours of drowning in the taste of rust and vomit before he at length awoke, dangling in the air by his wrist, held tight in that familiar, scaly grip. Bowser was talking to him… saying something… Luigi tried to open his eyes. Only one would open halfway, giving him a blurred glimpse of a scowling, draconic face. “Did you hear me? I asked you what exactly your plan was,” Bowser huffed, impatiently repeating his question. “Did you think you could jump out at the last moment and save Peaches the way you saved your brother? That you could bide your time until you found the right opportunity to make a fool out of me again?” The violent grip on Luigi’s wrist made it clear that he wanted an answer. After a few gurgling breaths, Luigi managed to speak with an agonizing slowness, feeling like he was chewing sewing needles with every movement of his jaw. “I just… don’t wa..nt… you to… hurt… anyone,” he stuttered, barely audible. Bowser rolled his eyes. “Adorable. Unfortunately…” Luigi felt his wrist break. He let out a meek cry, immediately strangled by the pain of his shattered mouth. “...You are going to pay me back for everything you’ve done.” Bowser leaned in closer to ensure he was heard, even as his prisoner teetered on the very edge of consciousness. “Once your brother is dead, once Peaches is finally mine, only then will I end your life the way it should’ve ended when we first met!” Luigi was too lost in the fog of agony and bloodloss to properly comprehend what was being said, nor did he notice the distant thud of wooden doors being kicked open. But Bowser's attention was immediately drawn to the new arrival to the rooftops. He half-expected to see a troop of palace guards, rushing to assist in a pointless, but noble effort. To his pleasant surprise, Mario alone emerged from the doorway to the battlements, as if summoned by the whispered threat. He rushed toward them, hammer upraised. When he was close enough to get a good look at his brother, that confidence immediately evaporated and he froze, a look of utter horror and disbelief etched into every detail of his face. Bowser wished he had a camera, but he knew it would only be a millisecond before the plumber’s horror turned to rage. To prevent any further resistance, he gripped Luigi by the skull and made his position clear: “One more step and I’ll tear his head off!”

This successfully kept Mario paralyzed. His feet remained fixed to the floor, chest heaving, teeth clenched, white-knuckle grip tightening around the handle of his hammer.

_____

Peach eventually found the key to her cage. It was bright silver and etched with the words “the key to my heart” in cursive letters, small enough to miss the first time she searched. Nauseated by the adornment, she hurriedly unlocked the door to her prison. Just as she emerged into freedom, the princess was startled by a cannonball crashing through the wall nearby. It wasn’t close enough to hurt her or the unconscious magikoopa, but it rattled her senses, and with her hands balled into fists she rushed to see who or what had created the sizable hole in the side of Bowser’s throne room.

She– to her utter delight– was greeted by Toad, calling to her from the deck of a stolen airship. It wasn’t one of those dinky clown cars or a Shy Guy balloon, but a true airship– built like a miniature galleon and equipped with loaded cannons.

Toad alone was at the helm, struggling to comprehend the controls, but learning quickly as he kept the ship steady.

Princess Peach immediately boarded the vessel on his invitation. She took a place in the crow's nest, and as they stuttered off toward the western tower she gave direction and kept lookout. They dipped low, flying close to the base of the castle to avoid as much attention as possible. Whenever a few unfortunate guards noticed the stolen ship and took aim to take them down, Peach called out their location, and Toad returned fire to great effect. These defensive measures, plus the earlier damage to the throne room, caused a small crowd of guards in clown cars to gather at their tail, but their galleon proved swift and sturdy, easily outpacing their pursuers.

_____

Mario tried to think of a plan, but he was utterly transfixed by his brother’s body. It didn’t look real, smeared and crushed and bent all wrong. He could hear and see shallow, labored breath, joined by a groan of agony when Bowser began walking forward while dragging his broken victim behind him. Mario didn't know what to do. "Save him!" his mind screamed, barking substanceless commands in a flood of terror, "Get him out! Do something! Fight back!"

“The hammer.” Bowser growled, “drop it.” Mario obeyed. No sooner did the weapon leave his grip he was plucked up in Bowser's free hand, arms pinned to his sides in a vice-like grip. Bowser, now with a plumber in each hand, slammed Mario into the parapet to ensure there was no powerup at play. Mario instinctively responded with a pained grunt, but otherwise seemed to pay no notice of his own position, keeping his attention fully on his brother. “Luigi!” He yelled, tears cracking his voice and blurring his vision. Luigi didn’t respond, but laid slack with his head still wrapped in Bowser's hand, the slow rise and fall of his chest the only indication that he was still alive. “You know, I originally planned for you to watch him die,” Bowser admitted with a tired sigh. “But I changed my mind. I think I’m done with you.”

No sooner had he said this, he reared back and threw Mario over the wall. A steep vertical drop awaited him, nine hundred feet down toward a wide river of molten rock.

______ Shading her eyes with her hand, Princess Peach caught a glimpse of Bowser atop the western side of the castle. She saw signs of a brief scuffle, then… a familiar red shape plunging over the side. Her heart stopped for a moment when she realized what she was seeing, and she urged Toad to increase the ship's speed despite the fact that they were already pushing the vehicle well beyond its limits. Toad, noting the panic in the royal's voice, did as he was told, and as the ship came into position with the stuttering groan of the overworked engine Peach leapt from the crow’s nest to catch her falling friend. Mario was snatched from the air with perfect precision. The floating properties of Peach’s dress cushioned the free fall just enough that when the two hit the deck of the ship, they were unharmed.

When Mario realized he was alive– saw that he was in good company– he reacted at first with a relieved sigh. The moment of joy was short lived, and his eyes were drawn back to the battlements overhead. “He-… he’s hurt!” The tone of his voice made Peach nauseous. Her fears all but confirmed, she held Mario a little tighter and turned to Toad. “Raise the ship’s altitude! Hone in on Bowser’s position! Hurry!”

“Yes, Captain Princess!” was the cheerful reply, Toad clearly not yet aware of the severity of the situation. With a salute he tugged on levers and twisted the great wooden wheel, drawing the bow of the ship upward at a sharp angle, sending them veering toward the rooftops where the shadow of Bowser loomed against the thundering black sky.