Hunkybeans - Bonehead Takes - Tumblr Blog

I’m not even gonna lie this was such good character design he literally had baggy cargo pants fingerless gloves and gauges even tho he was an animal and had none of those things. Like they made an unemployed 30 year old burn out into a creature for a kids cartoon

"why is EVERY song about love" I'm begging you to dig just a tiny bit deeper, there's literally thousands of songs that aren't love songs. You don't even have to look for the most obscure underground artists ever, the fucking Beatles of all people have a song about a guy who kills people with a hammer

After I do one big last violence crime will be solved forever

So…The Purge, then?

Guys in tech scorn social studies and then reinvent eugenics because it "just makes sense" all the time. They dismiss representational initiatives like learning about women and poc contributions to science and then they justify their bigotry with "let's be honest, technology was all invented by white men". They protect their ignorance because it's their weapon. Ugh

Wendigo maybe?

we have GOT to kill tiktok/twitter self-censorship i just witnessed a grown adult say the word “smex” out loud to our professor

There's a place just down the street where they chop off angel's wings and fry them in oil. You should try some. Oh, the angels? Yeah they're regular people now. Simultaneously their freedom of flight is ripped away from them violently and yet at the same time they are granted freedom from the yoke of divine subservience so it's bitter sweet for them or some gay shit like that. Anyways the wings are really good.

So who's got the eye today?

*goes up to a polyamorous triad* so which one of you unspools the thread of fate, which one measures it, and which one cuts it?

Too bad. Use mundane tools in your mundane life to make music instead. Beautiful magical music.

every day i have to wake up in a world where i was never given a rusted key by a fox that opens the door in my home that's always been locked, or inherited a sword made entirely of starlight from a distant relative, or been the subject of a prophecy that i will return magic to these shores, and honestly it's a huge fuckign bummer

This mfer literally always trying to bring up ranma

Muzzle. Next question.

wait if a vampires fangs are their reproductive organs how are we gonna put chastity cages on them

Moist von Lipwig. Carrot. Cheery Littlebottom. Colon. Tugelbend. Magrat. Just some of the beautiful names of Terry Pratchett.

you can just name your characters anything. you can name them Printer. you can name them Shnorpty. you can name them There Are Pillars. and peoppe will just have to accept it.

Consider: Apollo loves music. He knows if Odysseus makes it home musicians will craft amazing songs telling his tale.

I see your “Apollo agreed so easily because he doesn’t care about Odysseus” and raise you “the god of prophecy knows that Odysseus is going to make it home, so he’s not going to make much of an effort to stop him.”

An actual degree-holding mechanical engineer argued to me that you get more meatball surface area when you make one big meatball rather than many small ones. It wasn't until I mathematically proved it that he relented.

what's the most confidently and wrongly a grown adult has ever argued with you - I'll start.

at a work dinner - for scientists - a woman there was convinced that all of sign language was just spelling out words letter-by-letter. she was saying that what we consider sign language is just people spelling out full English words, and she said "it's amazing because it's the only universally-understood language." cue silence from the table.

she fully believed that deaf people in China were spelling out English words letter by letter in ASL to communicate, and that distinct words did not exist. we kept trying to correct her. she replied that it's one of her special interests and she's done extensive research on the subject.

I think sometimes the appeal of flirting is escaping the fact that you're both people with jobs and bills and stuff. I'm an office worker, you're an office worker. But just for this moment you're my girlfriend and I'm going to tell you that your smile lights up my life. Just for this moment you're going to tell me about your stressful day and I'll suggest "stress relief" and you're going to pretend not to know what I'm hinting at and we'll do this little dance where we acknowledge we are partners and reinforce we can be silly and unguarded with each other.

In this way I see flirting as an expression of vulnerability. If one person breaks kayfabe it makes the other look a little foolish, so you're trusting in each other to continue the facade of being fictional romantic people instead of real, serious people with jobs and stuff.

I think my problem is that I want to be flirted with and seduced but whenever someone tries that stuff on me irl I'm just kind of confused by it. Like who are you. Why are you speaking to me like this. We're all just people bro

I love the front bottoms because I can sing them in karaoke and my low singing skill is just studio-accurate

Margo!

The hell does your wife want with two mortalities

my bitch wife took my mortality in the divorce and now I am cursed to walk the earth a shambling husk forever trapped in the gray nothingness between the beauty of life and the release of death 👎👎👎👎

Ah yeah this ask was prompted by the "by via". Seems like you already know. Not a huge deal. Great comic by the way!

Hey if readers spot a spelling or grammatical mistake in paperteeth would you prefer they tell you or just ignore it?

feel free to tell me! but i probably wont bother fixing it unless its like reeaally bad bc i have to email ppl and i hate emailing ppl. like scarlet says "by via this godforsaken cat" in a recent ep bc i forgot to delete the by. or the via. i dont remember what i wanted.

(sometimes grammatical mistakes r on purpose tho)

Trim his claws and give him a knife

Every night after Diesel's wet food it is Snuggle Time where he spends 30 minutes telling me he loves me and not letting me get anything done

Even without the continued existence of elven enclaves in undeveloped forest, "elves went extinct" would still be an incomplete statement. History is more complicated than that. We thought the neanderthals were pushed to extinction by homo sapiens until we discovered some homo neanderthalensis DNA was mixed in with ours. Recent studies of particularly pointy-eared humans today suggest there may be some homo effeminatus still with us as well.

Elves (homo effeminatus) were some of the fastest mammals to ever live, reaching top speeds of up to 70 miles (112 km) per hour, but as preserved tissue samples found in 2017 revealed, their smooth, supple skin had no pores or sweat glands. Even with their elongated ears, they had far inferior thermal regulation when compared with early h. sapiens, a trait that would prove to be their downfall as a species. Their low stamina allowed our ancestors to gradually wear them down over prolonged hunts, a strategy that proved so effective that elves went extinct by 4000 BCE.