3. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Doggin' Around (1994)

3. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Doggin' Around (1994)

This is Ewan's third and last movie of 1994. Three movies in one year is impressive for a burgeoning actor and that's not including the television series and short film he was in that year as well. Unfortunately, his last project of 1994 didn't end on a high note for me.

Movie Review: Doggin' Around is a television movie starring Elliot Gould and Geraldine James. The movie is about Joe Warren, an American jazz pianist, reluctantly performing a tour short notice in England's less than desirable venues after the main act suddenly dies. He is put in the care of ex-jazz singer, Sarah Williams, who has sworn to never sing on stage again. Though they don't get along at first, the duo slowly open up to each other as they work through problems from their past. On paper, the movie sounds fine, but the truth of the matter is this movie is so boring and the acting is god awful! First of all, Joe Warren is an insufferable character. I kept saying to myself "No one talks like that!" The delivery of every single line out of the actor's mouth sounds stilted and manufactured. He sounded like he wanted you to know he was acting which just takes you out of the movie because of how unnatural it is. For a character whose charm is supposed to come from his witty and sarcastic humor, there was not a single joke that landed for me. There was only one joke that got a positive reaction from me. Mind you, I didn't laugh. I just thought "that wasn't a bad joke." The movie is slow. Even though we follow Joe Warren on tour, the sets all look the same so it feels like we stay in one place the entire movie. Also, the visuals are grey and dull. The one good thing I will say about this film is that because it's about a jazz musician we get to hear a lot of jazz in the score and the selections are enjoyable.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays a minor role as the character Tom Clayton, a double bass player who still has a lot to learn about show business. He accompanies Joe Warren on tour as his bassist and is eager to make a name for himself even if it means stepping on Joe's toes. Ewan doesn't have a lot of lines in this role though it is fun to watch him energetically pretend to play a bass. He also has long silky hair which was becoming his staple hair style during this era. His performance was good though short.

Screentime Percentage (All numbers are rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 10/89 minutes making his SP 11%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is this movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? No. Is it worth watching in general? No.

Where to Watch: Doggin' Around is currently uploaded for free on YouTube through the account "Ewan McGregor Vault". Just search "Doggin' Around 1994, with Ewan McGregor". Be warned that the quality isn't great. There are a couple moments where the sound cuts in and out as well as one moment where the visuals briefly cut out.

Conclusion: This is my first really negative review so I want to remind everyone that this is just my opinion. This movie is a skip for me but others have given it some very positive reviews. Don't be afraid to give it a watch and come to your own conclusion. If you do, I'd love to hear your opinion! But if what you're looking for is Ewan content, then I'd suggest you look elsewhere.

For the last week, I've been working on an Oliver x reader fanfic and tonight I finished it! I'll be posting it tomorrow. A wonderful coincidence that this came across my dash. 😁

Ewan McGregor & Mélanie Laurent

Beginners (2010)

1. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Being Human (1994)

EDITING NOTE: I didn't realize until a week after I posted this that I grossly miscalculated the Screentime Percentage. I'm sorry for that oversight and the correct SP is now posted in the review.

Our first review is here! 🎉

Being Human is our inaugural Ewan McGregor movie review and stars the late, great, Robin Williams.

Funny enough, if this movie came out ten or even five years later then I would have put it in the "guest appearance" category and not written a review. That's how small Ewan's role was lol. However, I felt that it was only fair to start with this one because....this is Ewan's first ever movie role! That's right, you'd be forgiven for thinking his first movie role was in "Shallow Grave" but his career started far more humbly lol.

Movie Review: Being Human is about a soul, Hector, that we watch be reincarnated into five different lives over the span of centuries. He lives as a caveman, Roman slave, Scotsman, Portuguese man, and finally, a modern family man. Throughout his lives, he experiences hardships and must decide how to handle them, though he doesn't always make the right decision. He also crosses paths with a couple of other people from his past lives. This movie is veryyyy slow. It's two hours of literally watching someone live their life no matter how mundane some moments of life are. However, the movie is also heartfelt and feels strangely nostalgic even though I never watched it growing up. I also really like the concept of the soul reincarnating and getting the chance to redo past mistakes. Watching this movie a second time definitely made me appreciate it more and the beauty that lies in a life simply lived.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays a character named Alvarez who has been shipwrecked with Hector. He has a whopping three, that's right, THREE lines! His character is not integral to the story and if you didn't know he was in the movie then you probably wouldn't even notice him. He looks much older than his actual 22 years as well, especially considering how he looks in his next project "Shallow Grave."

Screentime Percentage (the numbers here have been rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 2/122 minutes making his SP a lowly 2%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is this movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? Absolutely not. Is the movie worth watching? Yes, though the slow pacing is not for everybody.

Conclusion: Being Human is a quiet and contemplative film about life, our place in it, and how our love can span lifetimes. If you're a fan of Robin Williams and you have two hours to spare then I would encourage you to give it a watch. I rented the movie through YouTube which was the only place I could find it online.

P.S. if you do decide to watch the movie and just want to see Ewan, his first appearance is at 1:6:30 and last at 1:19:42. You can also watch one of his speaking lines on YouTube posted by the account Ewan McGregor Vault (where the image below is from).

Only the Shadows Know

Movie: Mortdecai (2015)

Characters: Inspector Alistair Martland

Oneshot / Yandere / Drabble

Word Count: 100

Synopsis: While her husband is away, Martland pays Johanna a secret visit.

A/N: So of course the moment I said that wanted to write at least once a week, I didn't touch the computer for a full month 🤦‍♂️. Well, no better time than the present to start again! I wasn't feeling any inspiration and didn't know who to write about. Finally, I realized that inspiration isn't something that's always there. Sometimes, you have to just sit down and start writing. Otherwise, you may be waiting for inspiration for an eternity lol. This is my first yandere. I've become interested in the genre and wanted to give it a shot. This is only drabble so it's very short but dang! Writing exactly 100 words was way more challenging than I expected lol.

Martland gazed lovingly at the woman deep in slumber before him. His desire to see her, to protect her, outweighed the risk of being caught. Besides, the sleeping pill he encouraged her to take was doing its job well. How could Mortdecai roam the world and leave his most valuable treasure defenseless? “I would never leave you, my love.” He softly muttered to himself. One day, he will confess his devotion to his angel and she will understand her place is with him. But for now, as he hides in the dark recesses of her room, only the shadows know.

5. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Blue Juice (1995)

Before we start, I have to give a disclaimer. For some reason, there are two different runtimes for this movie. The first is 90 minutes and the second is 99. I don't know if the second is special edition or has extended scenes, but that's the one I watched so the Screentime Percentage will be based on that runtime.

Fun fact: Keith Allen has a minor role in this movie which is a fun fact because he worked alongside Ewan in Shallow Grave!

Genre: Comedy/Sport

Rating: R

Director: Carl Prechezer

Starring: Sean Pertwee, Catherine Zeta-Jones

Synopsis: "Blue Juice" is about J.C., a surfer and local legend, experiencing anxiety over growing older and settling down. With his 30th birthday on the horizon, his childhood friends make an unexpected visit and plunge his life into chaos. J.C. has to decide what's more important: the call to adventure or the call of love.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character Dean Raymond. He's one of J.C's. friends and is a drug dealer. He wants to turn his life around but keeps hurting his friends in the process. He smiles and laughs a LOT and holds hands with another member of the friend group twice. He has long hair that's covered by a hat the majority of the movie. The hat has the brand name Stüssy on it which made me smile because Ewan eventually plays a character with the last name Stussy. We also get to see him with a bloody face due to a fight scene. His performance was fine and I really liked his character's outfits.

Screentime Percentage: Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 23/99 minutes making his SP 22%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is the movie worth watching for Ewan McGregor alone? Yes. Is the movie worth watching in general? Yes. This movie has grown on me a bit. Maybe I relate to the characters' internal struggles of life moving too fast, the fear of stagnating, no longer finding joy in your career, or allowing anxiety to rob you of new experiences now that I'm older.

Where to Watch: "Blue Juice" is currently free to watch with ads on YouTube.

Conclusion: It's cute and has some interesting themes it wants to explore. I just don't think it explores them well. It's a pleasant movie but one that you randomly stumble upon while waiting at the dentist or airport, if that makes any sense.

7. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: The Pillow Book (1996)

Genre: Erotic/Romance

Rating: Un-Rated

Director: Peter Greenaway

Starring: Vivian Wu, Yoshi Oida, Ewan McGregor

Synopsis: "The Pillow Book" is an erotic film about a woman, Nagiko, who has a fetish for men writing on her body. What started as an innocent tradition of her father writing on her for her birthday, evolved into an obsession with finding the perfect calligrapher / lover. Nagiko also aspires to be a writer like her namesake, Sei Shonagon, the author of The Pillow Book. After she is rejected by a book publisher who sexually assaulted her father she instead decides to walk the path of revenge.

Ewan Review: Ewan McGregor plays the character Jerome, a bisexual English translator. He is chosen by Nagiko to help with her revenge unbeknownst to him. He is completely nude several times in the film, has a female and male love interest, and sex scenes with both of them. He has an English accent for the movie and has a couple lines in French and Japanese. Another fun fact: you might notice that he's pretty slender in this role and that's because he was in the process of losing weight for his role in "Trainspotting".

Screentime Percentage: Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 28/127 minutes making his SP 22%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is this movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? Yes! Did I mention the nudity? Is it worth watching in general? I say yes. I know this movie won't be for everyone. It's a weird story, highly erotic, and has slow pacing. Still, I enjoy it and wouldn't dissuade someone from watching.

Where to Watch: "The Pillow Book" is currently available to rent through YouTube.

Movie Warnings: There are some things that happen in the movie that you might want to be aware of before committing to watching it. Nudity nudity and more nudity! Women and men are naked and yes that includes seeing their genitals. There are a LOT of penises in this movie. There's blackmail via sexual assault as well as a suicide scene, skin cutting, blood, and defiling of a dead body.

Conclusion: The Pillow Book" is a beautiful work of art. Though it is a weird story, it's also interesting and captures your attention. Though it's highly erotic, the eroticism adds value to the story and isn't there just for shock. And while the pacing may be slow, it allows the viewer to absorb information and appreciate the visual storytelling. I encourage you to open your mind and give it a chance. Like Nagiko, you just might learn something new about yourself.