Potato Tod

Potato Tod 😭

How would you describe Dick and Bruce’s relationship in your canon?

it’s 2am and ur POV is sitting in your car parked in a burger king parking lot trying to out-eat the oncoming hangover. you look to your left at the nightclub across the street as a middle aged father hauls his 18 year old daughter out. she’s a drunken mess, cursing at him while throwing a sloppy punch and trying to keep her boob from falling out of her shirt. he’s yelling at her. she starts screaming so much she throws up on her dad and now he’s patting her back and holding the hair out her face. she starts to cry, he starts to cry. now they’re both bawling and hugging in the middle of the street. the bouncer awkwardly looks away. you look down at your half-eaten burger and wonder if you should call your mom

family name passed down the generations

OMG SPREAD THE WORD!!!!

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I was laughing until Bruce sent Tim on a natural retreat with BoyScouts. Then I felt an abstract horror.

Bruce would have interesting ways to discipline his kids.

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Bruce: Listen to me, Damian! You can not steal my car and drive across country to visit Jon.

Damian: Then why do I know how to drive! And my mommy says I can! You don't own me!

Bruce: Young man, when you are under my roof you will follow my-

Damian: No I don't.

Bruce: If that's how it's gonna be. *Draws a circle around Damian* Stay there for five minutes.

Damian: D-d-d-daddy?

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Dick: *swinging from the chandelier that has been pass down in Bruce's family for generations* I'm gonna swing from the chan-

Bruce: Get down here this instant!

Dick: I'm not doing anything.

Bruce: Richard Grayson

Dick: You're not my dad!

Bruce: *brings out a bag of m&ms*

Dick: What are you doing? Those are mine?

Bruce: *opens it slowly*

Dick: Bruce?

Bruce:*eats one*

Dick: STOP, I'm coming down. Don't eat them!

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Jason: You can't make me. I'm not going to the party.

Bruce: *head vein throbbing* This is important. You can't skip this event.

Jason: *shrugs* You'll have to carry me.

Bruce: *takes a deep breath and walks away*

Jason: ahah, baby.

Bruce: *comes back with a bottle of castor oil and a spoon*

Jason: You sick sick man. Fine I'll go.

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Bruce: Tim you disappoint me.

Tim: I didn't think it would blow up the Batcave. Or make mustard gas. Or create a sinkhole.

Bruce: *sighs* I have no choice. You going on a nature retreat.

Tim: Bruce!

Bruce: Over two weekends. With the Boy Scouts.

Tim: *tears glisten in his eyes* Bruce...

Bruce: As a junior member.

Tim:

Bonus

Alfred: Right! That's it, Master Bruce. *Pours a spoon of castor oil8

Bruce:

I stan my gays