My Masterlist For My Blogs Mcavoy-girl And Callsignmayhem

My masterlist for my blogs mcavoy-girl and callsignmayhem

mcavoy-girl:

Loving and losing Dean Winchester x female reader

We'll be okay Dean Winchester x female reader

Stay with me Dean Winchester x female reader

Till we're grey and old Charles Xavier x female reader

Just like you Charles Xavier x female reader, Erik Lehnsherr x female reader

You son of an bitch Logan Howlett x female reader

Not broken Charles Xavier x female reader

Let me help you Charles Xavier x female reader, mentions of needles, alcohol and drugs used as medicine.

The final act of kindness/I gave them their happiness Robbie Turner x female reader from Atonement

Live without shame Robbie Turner x female reader from Atonement

Come back to me Robbie Turner x female reader from Atonement

The life you lived Robbie Turner x female reader from Atonement

callsignmayhem:

Kisses on fingertips Jake Seresin x female reader

Memories prequel/sequel/continuation to Kisses on fingertips, Jake Seresin x female reader

The letter he left you (kisses on fingertips-universe) Jake Seresin x female reader

Pictures (kisses on fingertips-universe) not a fic but pictures I made for the story

Flyboy and his darlings Jake Seresin x female reader

Others:

List of characters we need more fanfiction written about

Also this song which I think somehow fits both "kisses on fingertips and "memories" (just my opinion)

I might edit my fics every now and then

Loving and losing

Loving and losing someone you used to care about hurts. But you just have to move on, eventually.

But what if you can't move on? What will you do then?

Your last smile brought me so much pain, because it was a broken, defeated smile.

How I wish I could see you again even just for a few seconds. I never even got to say goodbye, not even 'I love you'. But whenever you are, I know you're finally at peace. The sad thing is that I know I will never be at peace until I meet you again.

Wherever and whenever that might be.

As the saying goes: "survivors have scars, victims have graves". Sometimes I have been thinking if it should've been me instead of you. The world needs Dean Winchester, more than they need me. I need you more than I need myself. Deep down I know that Sam needs you more than he needs me.

Which is why I have to do this. Come hell or high water, I will have to do this.

I have been trying to find a way to bring you back, Dean, and I think this is it, this is the way to bring you back.

You plunge the blade into your body, your gasp reverberating in the empty warehouse. You fall down on the hard, cold floor, your life starting to ebb away.

As your last breath starts to leave your lungs, you see sun flickering across the warehouse.

The sun hits you, shining onto your face as if it's saying goodbye on behalf of everyone you've ever known.

You faintly hear him yelling your name, feeling him kneel in front of you, grabbing your face with his calloused hands. You smile faintly, even though tears are falling down from your eyes.

You lift your hand up, skimming your fingers across his cheek, whispering out with your last strength:

"I love you… please understand… my reason… why did I do this…"

He grabs your hand, kissing it gently.

His eyes are glistening with unshed tears, as he whispers to you:

"It's okay, you can go now"

You look into his eyes one last time before your eyes slide shut, as you drift away into darkness.

He looks at you, tears falling down his cheeks.

He kisses your forehead one last time, before standing up, taking your body into his arms, carrying you out. He puts you into the backseat of Impala.

He gave you a hunter's funeral, scattering your ashes into the wind from the edge of a cliff. The wind blows, and the sun shines as your earthly remains go with the wind, free like a bird.

In the beginning there was a woman who was hellbent on bringing her beloved back, but in the end there was a man who had to let her go.

Just read Twist & Shout and I was and wasn't prepared to get my heart ripped out and shredded to pieces.

If anyone wants to read it, here's the link:

You son of an bitch!

"Logan, you son of an bitch!" You yell.

"Why you calling me that for?"

"You freaking drank my coffee!"

"So?"

"It was mine!" You state.

Logan just shrugs his shoulders, walking off. You grab his arm and make him turn around.

"Make me a new pot of coffee, then we're even"

"Make it yourself, I have students to teach"

"You motherfucker!"

Then Professor X wheels in.

"Language, my darling Y/N"

You shoot him a very angry glare. He wheels to the coffee machine, putting it on.

"Logan, get to your classes, we'll deal with this later"

You turn around angrily.

"Why'd you let him go?"

Because now isn't the time to solve this fight"

"It was the perfect time, that bastard drank my coffee!"

"Now, don't you have classes to attend to?"

"Shit!"

You turn on your heels and run off. You run down the corridors, until reaching your class room. You sigh, seeing none of the students on their respective seats yet. Well at least you aren't the only one late for class. You wait for good ten minutes until the students pile in.

"I'm going to ignore the fact that you're late, since I'm being nice, but as a warning someone again drank my coffee, so I might be little cranky today"

Soon you dismiss the students, they leave the room to go to their next classes. You step out of your class room, seeing Logan talk with Storm in the hallway.

"Logan!"

"Uh-oh, did you drink her coffee again?"

Storm asks.

"Might have"

Storm sighs and walks away. She knows exactly what is coming.

"You once again drank my coffee"

"Yeah, so?"

"Why do you do it only when I make coffee?"

"Because I can"

You let your powers swirl out your finger tips. Logan lets his claws come out. Then you hear a voice in your minds, it's Professor, he's asking you to come to his office. You reluctantly walk towards his office, Logan following you. You reach the room, pushing the door open and stepping in.

"Sit down"

You two do as he says.

"Alright, now, you seriously need to stop this bickering"

"But.." You say.

"But.." Logan says.

"No buts, I'm serious"

"Now apologize to each other and you may leave"

Logan stands up, trying to leave the room.

"Logan" Professor says.

"Alright, I'm sorry I drank your damn coffee!"

"Apology accepted and I'm sorry as well for calling you names"

You get up and leave the room with Logan.

As soon as you're out of the door, you say:

"Though you deserved being called names" You grin at him.

"Haha, real funny, shorty"

"I'm not short!"

And there you two go again bickering like a married couple. You and Logan walk down the corridor, hurling playful insults to each other. Professor X watches your receding backs, smiling to himself.

The life you lived

You watch the officers take him away, tears streaming down your cheeks.

You then turn around and walk away. Your mother follows you inside the house. She grabs your arm, making you turn around.

"How could you?" You ask.

"I had to.."

"No, you didn't have to!" You interrupted her.

"I love him, more than you ever could think!"

"No, you don't, you just think you do"

You let out a sigh, kneeling down to take off your heels. You straighten up again, looking straight at your mother with glistening eyes.

Then you walk away to your room, this time your mother doesn't follow you. She just watches you go.

5 years later, the war has started. You're nurse at hospital, which is located on the country side. You just needed to get as far as you could get from your family, from your old life, from your past.

You are putting the supplies away at the storage room, when nurse running by says that there are soldiers coming. You run out of the room, following her, rounding the corners until you reach the lobby, which is swarmed with soldiers and nurses. You get right to helping the soldiers as best as you can. Then you are asked to tend to one specific soldier. They say he's asking you, you hurry towards the room, where the injured soldiers are located in.

You see the area secluded from the other area with plain light brown curtains. You move the curtains, slipping inside. You turn around, seeing him lying on the bed. You stare at him, he looks at you.

"Robbie" You whisper.

"Y/N" He whispers back.

You walk to his bedside, sitting down. He grasps your hand, squeezing it gently. You let your eyes check him out for any injuries. Only one you can see is that he has his arm bandaged. You put your lips against his, kissing him. He puts his arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer. You break the kiss, putting your foreheads together.

"You have to back to the battlefront, don't you?"

"I don't know, but I hope not"

You nod.

"Can you walk?"

"Yes"

"Then follow me"

He gets up and follows you.

"Now, we'll go and ask someone if you have to go back"

He nods.

"Hey, sir, we have a question for you!" You call out to the higher rank soldier.

"Yes, ma'am?"

"I'd like to know if he has to back to the battlefront?"

"I'm afraid so, we need every single man we can get"

"Alright, thank you, sir"

He raises his hat for you, walking away.

You turn to Robbie, sad look on your face.

He pulls you in for a hug, whispering in you ear:

"Marry me?"

You grab his hand, going to find a church. Soon you're inside the church, holding hands, standing in front of the priest. Robbie's two soldier friends, Nettle and Mace are there as witnesses.

"Now I pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride"

Robbie pulls you closer to him, pressing his lips to yours.

*small timeskip*

You're at the trailway station, saying goodbye to Robbie.

"Come back to me" You whisper in his ear. He says nothing, just kisses you from the train window.

You step down to the ground, holding his hand until it slips from your grasp. You see the train go further and further away, watching it go until it has disappeared from sight.

*another timeskip*

You're at a small house in the village you spent your time with Robbie until he had to leave to go back to the war.

You stand on the balcony, staring at the sea, you haven't heard from him from a long time.

But you know that he'll come back. You go back inside, seeing the higher rank soldier through the window you encountered earlier at the hospital. He's holding a letter, you already know what it reads. You open your front door, collapsing down to your knees, as the notifier approaches you.

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but your husband has died of septicaemia"

You thank him in whisper, he kneels in front of you, putting the letter in your palm, shutting your hand around it. Then he kisses your head, standing up and leaving. You stay on your knees on the ground. Then you hear small footsteps coming towards you.

"Mommy, where's daddy?"

You look up at your and Robbie's children with glistening eyes.

"Daddy isn't coming back"

Your children walk to you, wrapping their small arms around you.

You let out a small cry, whispering:

"Daddy is never coming back"

You shut your eyes, memories flashing through your mind. The day you first met him, the happiest moments of your life with him and last time you ever saw him.

You whisper into the air:

"If you must die, die knowing that your life was my life's best part"

Weeks later after you have buried him, you receive a small package in the mail.

You open it, seeing Robbie's few belongings, including the stack of letters and photos, cigarettes and a lighter. And of course his wedding ring.

You let single tear roll down your cheek, dropping down on the letter on top. It was never delivered to you. You read the text in it.

"I'm coming back to you"

Except he never did.

You're lying on your bed, surrounded by your children and grandchildren, your eldest child is holding your hand.

"Mom, it's okay, go meet dad, you deserve it" The eldest one says, smiling at you.

You smile at them, looking at every and each one of them. You then look up and mouth:

"I'm coming to you, my love"

You shut your eyes and let out your last breath on Earth. Then you open your eyes, letting out your first breath in Heaven, standing inside the house, you smile. You then look around the small house, it's just like you remembered it. Even the knife Robbie did leave on the table is there just like the day he left to go back to the war. You open the balcony door, stepping out. You breathe in the sea air. You lower your gaze to the beach, seeing him standing near the waterline. You smile, running down the balcony stairs.

You come to a stop right in front of him.

"Hello, my love" Robbie says as he turns around to face you. He pulls you into a hug, vowing to himself that he'll never ever let go again.

You pull back, looking up at his dazzling blue eyes.

"I've missed you so, so much"

"I know, love, I know, I've missed you too"

He pulls you against his chest, wrapping his arms around you, watching the sunset together, for the first time but certainly not the last time in forever.

The end.

Kisses on fingertips

A call.

One simple call from them.

That's all it took.

For you to shatter completely.

The day had started just like every other day before, with the routine you had honed down over the years to get the kids to school on time. After dropping them off, he went to work, you went back home and later ran some errands.

You were just finishing up putting the groceries away, when the call came.

Without checking the caller ID, you hit the green button, answering the call.

“Hello?”

“Am I speaking with Mrs. Seresin?”

“Yes, you are”

“I am deeply sorry to bother you, but…”

Whatever the voice on the other end of the call said, was a complete haze to you apart from the part that you should come to the base as soon as possible.

So you did.

And how you wish you hadn't.

Because nothing could have prepared you for the news you were about to get the minute you stepped in those doors.

You saw both admiral Tom Kazansky and captain Pete Mitchell standing there waiting for you in the middle of the lobby, dressed in the white uniforms, forlorn looks on their faces.

Little bit to the left were his friends, his squadron, the people who he flew with almost daily. Also dressed in their whites, having similar expressions as the two men before your eyes.

As you walked forward, you looked down to admiral Kazansky’s hands, realizing he's holding something. As soon as you see what he's holding, your eyes get blurry with unshed tears.

Both captain Mitchell and admiral Kazansky take a step towards you, as you come to a stop just meters away from them.

Captain Mitchell stops a mere meter away as admiral Kazansky comes to stand right in front of you, placing the items in your right hand.

Few tears slip down your cheeks, when you receive the confirmation for what the items are. The white cowboy hat you are holding in your hand drops down to the floor.

They are dog tags and a picture that is slightly burned from the bottom right corner.

His dog tags with his wedding ring dangling in the chain.

His sunglasses.

Your picture.

Flag on the pole outside at half-mast.

People around you dressed in uniforms.

Your legs give out under you, and you collapse down to your knees right next to the hat. Still holding the items. Tears running down your cheeks. Admiral Kazansky kneeling in front of you, letting you sob against his shoulder.

You are watching as the wings get punched into his casket, silent tears streaming down your face.

Your kids are standing next to you, your oldest Benjamin holding your middle ones, Cade's hand and your youngest Eden holding the pant leg of Benjamin.

You walk forward as soon as the last person around the casket has left.

Crouching down, you place your forehead against the smooth wood surface of the casket. The folded flag rests on your lap.

After a while you straighten up, pressing a kiss on your fingertips and placing them on the surface right next to the golden wings.

The sky is greying by the minute, a few droplets of water starting to come down from the skies above. It's as if the sky is mourning with you.

Arriving home after the funeral, you just stand in the hallway that opens up to a living room, staring down at the flag in your hands. Everything seems so dull, like all the colors got sucked out of the world.

You walk to the kitchen, behind you on the shelf is a white cowboy hat, and on the floor there is a pair of worn boots.

In the kitchen you gently place the flag down on the table.

“Mom?”

You look at your seventeen year old son, who has a sorrowful look in his eyes.

Eyes that are just like his dad's.

You look at his features, every one of them bears a resemblance to him.

Him.

You can't even get yourself to think, let alone mention his name.

Jake.

At that thought your eyes start filling with tears again, Benjamin wraps his arms around you, soon you feel two sets of smaller arms wrap around you as well.

Cade.

Eden.

The four of you just stand in the kitchen while outside your home it's a downpour of rain, the flag still folded and lying on the table behind you. One piece of you is missing.

At first it seemed so hard to get back to the routines, even with help from others.

But you knew it was what Jake would have wanted, for you to keep going. If not for your sake, then for the kid's sake.

But day after day, week after week, year after year, the heartache gets tolerable even though it never fully goes away.

Years go by in a blur, the kids are growing fast, going through all the heartbreaks when trying to find the one and only for them, the first time your kids bring girlfriends and boyfriends home, when they eventually get married and countless other memories and traditions.

You remember waiting at the hospital waiting room, with Cade and Eden and their spouses.

Footsteps echo on the floor.

“Mom”

You look up at Benjamin.

He smiles at you, offering his hand. You take it, standing up and walking with him down the corridor. Benjamin stops in front of a door, and opens it. He guides you inside, where you see Mia, Benjamin's wife lying on the bed.

Benjamin goes over to her, kisses her temple and lifts someone up from her arms.

“Mom, I'd like you to meet your grandson”

You take a careful step forward, looking down at the sleeping bundle in your son's arms. You gently trail a finger down the newborn's cheek.

“His name is Jake”

You freeze, look up at Benjamin and see his soft smile. Your eyes get watery.

Benjamin places the newborn in your arms, and as soon as he's done that, baby Jake opens his eyes.

There you see the eyes you have always loved staring back at you.

You sob a little at that.

“He's got the eyes”

“I know, mom” Benjamin places an arm around you, both of you watching down at the baby you are holding.

Over the years, you are blessed with more grandchildren, even with one great grandchild.

One day you are watching your family at the BBQ party that is being held at Benjamin's home. The strays of sun hit you in the face, making you inhale the late summer air. The wind blows some leaves that have already dropped from the trees around the yard.

You get up from the stairs you have been sitting on, and walk to Benjamin. He hears you walking towards him, and turns around.

“Everything okay, mom?”

You nod.

“Go gather you sister and brother, there's some place I'd like to visit”

Soon you are walking with them among rows of headstones, until you stop in front of the one you were looking for. The one with a small jet engraved on the right corner of the headstone, as per your request.

As the wind blows and the sun slowly is disappearing behind the horizon, you wrap the cardigan a little bit tighter around you.

You place the wild flowers down in front of the headstone, reading the engravings.

“In loving memory of our beloved:

Lt. Jake Seresin,

a father, husband and a son.”

You kiss your fingertips, placing them against the cold stone, feeling a slight warm sensation under your fingers as if the headstone recognizes you. That was the last time you visited the cemetery.

You are lying in a warm bed, surrounded by your kids.

Benjamin is by your right side, whilst Cade and Eden are by the left side.

You fondly look around the room at the people you love. You cough, and Benjamin offers you to take a sip of water from the glass, but you shake your head. You take a breath.

“I need you to… promise me one last thing”

They nod.

“After I'm gone bury me… next to your father”

“Of course, mom”

“And everything else can be found on your testament, mom, we know”

You smile at them.

“Eden, would you hand over that box from the side table?”

Eden turns and grabs a small dark wooden box with Seresin engraved in the lid.

She passes it to you, and you trace your finger across the engraved name. Pressing a small kiss on your fingertips, placing them against the lid. Your eyes shut momentarily but soon open again.

You open the box, taking whatever items are inside out and placing them on the bed.

Stack of pictures and a letter from along the way.

Dog tags with his wedding ring in the chain.

His worn sunglasses.

The necklace he gave to you on your first anniversary.

His necklace that has your and the kids' names engraved.

You lift up your necklace with shaky hands, placing it on Eden's palm, closing her hand around it. She always has adored the necklace and now it's hers.

Next you take out Jake's necklace, giving it to Cade. He has been fascinated by it since he was a small boy, so you decided it should be his.

Then you pull out the dog tags, lowering them down on Benjamin's palm.

“Mom, I can't take the tags”

“I might've worn them every day since his passing but they are yours now”

You take off your wedding ring, handing it to Benjamin.

“Put it on.. the chain with your dad's ring”

He does as told.

“Now I need you to promise me to cherish and pass down those items with the story behind them.. for future generations”

You take a small wheezy breath, grabbing a hold of the sunglasses, clutching them tight.

Your eyes start to blur.

“I love you all”

“We love you too, mom”

“Rest now”

“Tell dad we said hi”

Your eyes flutter shut as your chest stills. You have a faint smile on your lips.

Your children kept all their promises to you just like they said they would.

They buried you next to Jake.

They cherished and passed down the items you gave them.

They made sure every single generation after them knew how the story of Seresin's went.

Your eyes open, seeing everything so brightly. You look around, realizing you are at the beach behind the Hard Deck. There at the beach, as you walk closer you see Pete and Tom sitting in foldable chairs, and multiple people playing volleyball in the sand.

As you near the squadron, Tom turns his head, smiles and nudges Pete. He also turns and smiles at you, nodding towards the water line where the group of pilots are playing.

You nod at them and smile, going past them.

You stop right by the edge of the makeshift volleyball field.

One by one they stop playing, until the one person you have waited so long to see again, turns around and sees you. He drops the ball. Then you and he both move towards each other as if gravity is pulling you together. In a way it always has been and always will be doing so.

Soon you are standing face to face, looking each other straight in the eyes.

He cups your cheek, and you place your hand on top of his.

Then his lips crash against your in a fierce kiss. You pull apart, he rests his forehead against yours, both breathing heavily.

His sunglasses resting on top of your head.

“Hey”

“Hi, sweetheart”

You might have some catching up to do with all of them, but luckily you've got all the eternity for it.

Part 2

The letter

Pictures

Benjamin is 17 years old, Cade 14 years old and Eden is 6 years old when they lost their dad.

A/N: I finished writing this between 4 and 5 in the morning, so pardon me if there's any mistakes. I have to admit writing this got me crying.

If anything is unclear, just ask and I'll try my best to explain.

Had to repost cuz Tumblr was being irritating and didn't let me edit the post, only because my original post had disappeared somewhere.

Sorry for the hassle!