EYES OF THE ORDER

EYES OF THE ORDER

It gets talked about fairly often that the player coming to help Halsin is a big part of why he falls for them so fast, but I think one part that gets overlooked is how lonely Halsin is- and how unused to being treated with kindness he is.

He talks about how he had few peers after the Shadow Curse. They all either died, or he had to distance himself to be the leader, and none could be true confidantes to him. He lost Thaniel to the curse for 100 years. When he was enslaved for three years, not only was that an isolating experience in and of itself, but he was chained in the matron and patron's bedchamber- he wouldn't have even had other slaves for company.

Again, he didn't get along particularly well the other Druids- Rath, Nettie and Apikusis are the only ones who speak positively of him- and the way he talks makes it sound like there might have been active animosity.

He was betrayed by Aradin's adventuring party, and even though the Tiefling refugees speak of him being a good man and having appreciated him allowing them into the Grove, they also refuse to speak with him after leaving the Grove, blaming him for them having to leave and being slaughtered in the Shadow-Cursed Lands.

The player isn't just the person who fixed Halsin's problems, they're also damn near the first friend he's had in a century, and more to the point, they're one of the very few people he's had treat him with genuine kindness in a long time. You're the first one to want him for being Halsin, to not just want what he can offer. You're the first person he can truly be himself around- the first person where he's allowed to make mistakes and not be castigated for it.

You're the first person to actually care about him in a very, very long time.

Leona and Jamil is a rare but nice ship and you only made it cuter by adding Vil

Hi! So, I reblogged it a first time with my input in the tags but I kept thinking about this headcanon and there's not enough tags for me to fully go on about it. Allow me to hijack your post to tell you about what I know as an ADHD moron (of course it won't be all ADHD experiences since I have the fun molotov cocktail of ADHD+Autism), and how it does fit Jamil.

First allow me to rewrite what I put in the tags :

His global hyperactivity can stem from his job as bodyguard/retainer needing him to be hyper vigilant 24/7, but it's also possible that he's just like that. Contrary to popular belief, hyperactive people can appear calm on a regular basis (like me) but it'll show in tiny things like stims or simply always doing something like chores or homeworks. Jamil's physical hyperactivity seems to show, as you stated, in him being unable to keep in place when in a rush of adrenaline (so in a fight), or his being incapable to just rest by always having to do something (like how he does in chap6 despite being away from Kalim).

For his mental hyperactivity, Jamil ALWAYS over calculates/gets lost in thoughts/mumbles about whatever catches his attention. Being unable to shut one's thoughts is a good sign of ADHD. Yes it means we can be better at pattern recognizing (and so we can be very foreseeing thanks to this, right Jamil?) but it also means we can get stuck in the thinking part and never go on the acting part (once more something Leona calls Jamil out for in chap6)

ADHD also tends to mess up one's notion of time. Most people know that someone with ADHD tends to forget to keep track of time and thus is often late to everything, but something that can happen when you mix ADHD with anxiety is an hypervigilence to time. For example, I'm always ready hours in advance and the one to remind everybody that it's time to get going because we're gonna be late otherwise. Likewise, Jamil is the one to always remind Kalim about his timetables and his appointments.

Jamil's hyperfixation seems to be food, according to the 4koma series. That's also the thing he mentions the most in game (besides Kalim obvs), and as a minor hyperfixation of course there's poison (this one is more about his "work" and past experiences, but that doesn't make it any less of an hyperfixation). What's great is that food is an hyperfixation he enjoys! Sometimes you have the terrible luck of hyperfixating on something you hate (like me who sometimes hyperfixates on video games I despise and being unable to get it out of my head before having made a three hours long video essay in my own head about why the game sucks *looking at you MW3*)

Dancing is, indeed, a good way to healthily exteriorize hyperactivity. Plus basketball. (Plus martial arts probably) Jamil is a very fit person who obviously does a lot of sports so it can explain why he manages to appear so calm at first glance.

One symptom of ADHD you might have heard about is the difficulty with starting projects that's due to a lack of dopamine. Jamil doesn't seem to have problems with those, but there's a trick to it that Jamil could very well be using : having pets/people under one's care tends to act as a stimulant. No matter how forgetful or frozen in place you are about a task, when you have a pet or a child bother you to do something, you do it. Sometimes they don't even need to bother you because you feel responsible for them so you get on with projects that have an impact on them even when you don't want to. With Jamil's role as Vice Housewarden and him being a retainer, he always has people under his care which might help him with starting projects.

Linked with the previous paragraph is the lack of satisfaction at the end of a project. Most neurotypical people apparently do feel a sense of satisfaction/feel rewarded when they finish a project, but many neurodivergents (among them ADHD people) feel absolutely no satisfaction beside the "F*ck I'm glad I'm finally done with it!" In game, Jamil has only shown satisfaction over something being done with the final performance of the SDC. Other than that (correct me if I'm wrong, I'm not yet caught up with vignettes and lore) he doesn't seem to be feeling any satisfaction to a job done. Mostly he's just glad when the day ends and he can take some time to himself.

ADHD people can also have troubles regulating their anger (which, yeah, chap4 hello!) If you're like me you'll keep in check for as long as possible and suddenly burst a nerve without warning (does that remind you of something ?) The thing is, we are always keeping ourselves in check when we can because otherwise people get bitchy about us moving all the time or feeling "too strongly". When we're happy, we're ridiculously happy. When we're angry, all hell breaks loose. The rare times Jamil doesn't keep himself in check, he often goes overboard.

To finish, as you said, Jamil would be very good at hiding the most bothersome/disruptive sides of ADHD. He is a certified liar who had a whole dorm under his spell (lol) so it's not farfetched to believe he is constantly masking about this too. The rare times he's not lying/masking, he does get very hyper and over expressive, which is something that can happen with ADHD when you're too excited about something and your mask slips off. To the untrained eye it can look like a mania episode when it's just that even the most outwardly calm ADHD can go "uncontrollable" when they finally let loose (I'm referring to GloMas and chap6 and the Halloween event here mostly)

Anyway ! Is Jamil ADHD? Maybe. You can explain all those behaviors another way with his general upbringing. But I believe this headcanon is pretty well grounded and you can find details in game to support it!

There's this very random head canon that I have... Jamil has ADHD.

I have no idea what I mean, but like... It just. Yeah. I thought of this during a battle and ya know how all the little sprites have these little motions that they do? Jamil's sprite wouldn't stop moving. Every few seconds, Jamil would shift around. WAY more than any of the others.

(I'm not very familiar with what exactly ADHD/ADD is or what it entails, so I hope I don't offend anyone. It is not my intention at all.)

Obviously, Jamil had to train himself to be very vigilant as a retainer (as anyone in that industry would have to) and he has a very good poker face. I don't know where I'm going with this, I think he would be really good at hiding it. But I feel like maybe he fidgets a lot or has to constantly have his hands doing something. Maybe dancing is his outlet.

All this to say, I want other head cannons on this. I want to know about Jamil's hyperfixations. Anyway. What do you guys think?

(I'm sorry if this was offensive at all, I'm working to learn more about ADHD/ADD to avoid that. If anyone has any information they're comfortable sharing, I'd love to hear it. I feel like all I know is hyperfixations and being fidgety as well as losing focus a lot, which is a gross understatement about what ADHD actually is. Please let me know!)

Ah yes, and here we see the Depression Trio™, chilling in the shade. 💀🦁♦️

No idea where this thought came from, but I got thinking of Yuu/you seeking out a romantic relationship in NRC (at least partially) as a form of protection. Like, they're magicless, reliant on Crowley's goodwill, very unfamiliar with this world, and basically don't even legally exist. So it sure wouldn't hurt to have someone in their corner.

Like, sunshine boy Kalim? Sure would have the money to provide, and perhaps wouldn't be the hardest to persuade, either. Good luck with convincing Jamil that it's a good idea to let you get close, tho.

Azul would certainly understand the transactional nature of such a relationship, yet he might also be a little too aware of the power he would hold in that situation.

Malleus - well, he's powerful, for sure. Not many folks would be willing to mess with you if they knew they'd have to answer to him for it.

Any thoughts y'all have regarding the rest of the cast?