Jake: Light Travels Faster Than Sound.

Jake: Light travels faster than sound.

Isa: This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Isa: If you want my advice-

Kai: No offense but you’re the last person I want relationship advice from. You tried to kill your boyfriend. Multiple times.

Isa: First off, that was before we started dating. Secondly, he’s also tried to kill me.

Kaylee: It’s true. It was mutually attempted murder.

Kaylee: What’s an orgasm?

Kai: When you fold paper to look like birds and shit.

Jake: Isn’t that origami tho?

Isa: No, you dumb fuck, that’s oregano.

Isa: Do you take constructive criticism?

Jake: Not without crying.

Isa: Your call is very important to us. So please enjoy this 40 minutes flute solo.

Jake: *starts playing the flute*

Isa: It’s not the best, but it’ll do.

Isa: Hand me the people opener.

Jake: ...

Jake: Pardon?

Isa, annoyed: The people opener! Just hand it to me!

Jake, stressed: WHAT THE FUCK IS A PEOPLE OPENER?

Isa: How do you not know what a people opener is? Its pointy- you know? With a handle?

Jake: Knife. It's called a knife.