Just Got Hit With The Angst Stick So Get Ready To Fucking Cry Losers

just got hit with the angst stick so get ready to fucking cry losers

Moon Boys Sleeping Headcanons

Rating: PG •  Masterlist | ao3 | want to be tagged? • ko-fi •

Warnings: some fluffy fluff, mentions of reader, not beta read

Word count: 861

Steven:

I firmly believe that this man constantly moves in his sleep.

He’s rolling around all over the place.

One of those people that hold their arms/legs up in their sleep in the most uncomfortably looking positions. 

There has been more than one occasion where you wake up and see Steven sitting up in bed, fully asleep, and you have to coax him back into lying down.

He is taking up all of the space, then hardly any. 

He’s got all the covers and then none. 

Side and back sleeper, for sure. Loves to be the big or little spoon when going to bed and will twist himself into the most uncomfortable positions for himself if it means you're comfy. 

There is normally at least some part of him touching you, even if he is out of it. 

You have woken up to him holding your hand or your arm in his sleep. Or curled up into a ball and snuggled into your side. 

His feet are always warm, no matter how cold it is.

Delights in eating in bed, watching TV cuddling with you. (Will tell Marc he never eats in bed with a completely straight face.) 

Once he knows about Marc and doesn’t worry so much about sleepwalking he has the ability to fall asleep anywhere and anytime. Literally his eyes are closed and a second later it’s lights out. 

Mumbles in his sleep. It’s never actual words, just little sounds. You video him sometimes to show him in the morning. 

He laughs about it for ages. 

Remembers his dreams in vivid detail. 

Always wakes up with messy hair, no matter how hard he tries or what material his pillow is. 

Prefers to sleep in pyjamas even when it’s burning hot, because it doesn’t feel right otherwise.

Marc:

Back sleeper. Literally lays down like he’s going into his coffin, so stiff it should be uncomfortable. 

However if you’re in bed with him he will snuggle up and lay all over your chest and tummy, and please play with his hair while he goes to sleep. He needs it. 

Doesn’t talk in his sleep, but flinches and twitches. The movements are usually small, like a mini electric current runs through his nerves. 

Pulls a face at eating in bed, will get the handheld vacuum cleaner out and hoover the sheets. “Steven, why are there crumbs here?” 

“I don’t know mate, don’t ask me.” 

“There those stupid seaweed chip things you eat, you’re the only one of us that eats them.”

“First, their crisps Marc, say it with me crisps.”

“Steven-”

“Secondly, Jake eats them too.” 

“I know it was you Steven, you always eat in the bed-”

“I’m the only one who changes the bloody covers, aren’t I? I think I’ve earned it.”

“That’s not-”

“I changed the covers last week.” Jake chimes in. 

“You’re right, you did mate, sorry about that.” 

“No problem.” Jake gives him a mental thumbs up.

Marc is just like !!! Where is my apology for eating in the bed? !!!

However, if Marc wakes up before you he will bring you breakfast in bed and purposefully ignore Steven when he playfully calls him a hypocrite.

Sleeps in pyjamas if it’s cooler, but will also sleep naked if it’s hot. 

Falls asleep quickly and doesn’t remember his dreams at all. (He prefers it that way.)

Deep, but light sleeper. Goes into a deep sleep very quickly, but is awake and alert if something sounds ‘wrong’. You once stubbed your toe on the bathroom door and let out a little yelp and he was up and by your side before you’d even realised.

Likes to put lavender and eucalyptus sprays and oils on his pillow. 

Jake: 

Very good at sleeping sitting up and power naps, but prefers you to be laying on top of him if you're in bed. 

It makes him feel grounded to have your weight on him. If you’re happy to lay completely on him he is so content, it doesn’t matter what weight you are, he just loves wrapping his arms around you like you’re his own weighted blanket. 

You buy him a weighted blanket for a gift and he wraps himself up in it constantly. 

Often complains about the cold when sleeping, even when it’s hot his feet are still freezing. He has taken to always wearing socks in bed.

Which leads to a rather amusing sight in August when it is boiling hot, so he’s sleeping naked, but his feet are still covered in fluffy socks. 

He calls them his ‘sexy socks’, and has pairs in a variety of colours. He prefers ones that have loud patterns and colours. 

(I headcanon Jake as a kniter, so I think he would definitely make some for himself as well.) 

Doesn’t usually eat in bed, but does on occasion to affectionately annoy Marc. 

Remembers his dreams, and remembers Steven’s and Marc’s as well. 

Likes to dramatically push you into bed, and throw himself in after. 

Doesn’t move around a lot in the night, but occasionally talks. 

Never wakes up first if he can help it, usually stays asleep while Marc and Steven are up. 

Thank you for reading!

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what kind of AUs do yall like

i only know the basic ones, i need some new material

throw em at me come on i'm decent at catching

SICK GROSS EW GO AWAY: aka how not to act like a manchild when ur sick

Different kinds of sick need different kinds of care. don't be fucking useless. lemme help.

Head cold:

Take a decongestant. wait ten minutes. take a hot shower and blow your nose a thousand times. Bro i swear it helps so much i fucking love itttt

Claritin D also works a lot

fresh air. open a window and turn on a fan. it helps your room not feel stuffy and gross.

blow your nose, don't just sniff it up. ew.

salty spicy food. the salt breaks down the enzymes of the mucus in the back of your throat (which is why it hurts) and the spice helps clear your sinuses. I like spicy pho or ramen, cause I can save the broth for later and sip on it.

drink a fuckton of water, but also eat too. "feed a cold starve a fever" or whatever is BULLSHIT. eat. drink. shut up.

avoid caffeine if possible. your body needs to go slowly to help feel better, don't jam it full of Monster or Red Bull or coffee. diluted green tea would be the most caffeine.

Chamomile tea with ginger. honey too if you don't like the bitterness.

hot water. warm things. help the throat and loosen the phlegm in your lungs.

Tummy bug/nausea:

light foods. nothing high in sugar, carbs, or sodium. plain bread, chicken or vegetable broth, limit the fruit juice.

nothing really acidic. Coffee especially. dairy is also eep maybe no.

water is good. always drink lots of water.

don't starve it. a lack of food will also make you nauseous. small, easy snacks throughout the day.

avoid heavy amounts of medicine. if you need to take it, obviously take it, but dumping paracetamol/advil/tylenol/ that stuff will only make it worse.

sleeeepp so much sleep

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ADVIL AND TYLENOL AND WHEN TO USE THEM:

stop mixing them up, they do different things.

Tylenol: acetaminophen. Pain relief. easier on the stomach than ibuprofen/advil.

Advil: ibuprofen. pain relief, anti-inflammatory. better for fevers and any swelling pain. harder on the stomach, take with food and lots of water.

take care of yourself please, always sleep and water love you xox

did you imagine your own tragic death a lot as a child or are you normal

"Not all men"

You're right, my favorite fictional man would never probably would but he's pretty so idc