Have You Ever Seen The Best Movie Of All Time Aka Hocus Pocus? (if You Haven't I Rlly Suggest You Do

have you ever seen the best movie of all time aka Hocus Pocus? (if you haven't I rlly suggest you do it's *chefs kiss*) Well, what if I- *dsmp-ifyies another piece of media*

*ahem* So, on October 31st, 1693, Technoblade witnesses his sister being whisked away into the woods by three witches (aka the dream team) who want to absorb her youth and regain their own through the power of a potion they brew.

Being the big brother he is, Technoblade rushes into the woods to confront the witches but is too late and is transformed into an immortal pig forced to live with his guilt for not saving his sister.

Dream, George and Sapnap are arrested and sentence them to death for the murder of Technoblade and his sister but before their execution, Dream casts a spell that will resurrect the three of them when there is a full moon on All Hallows Eve and a foolish child lights a cursed candle.

Flash forward, modern day, Halloween. The Watson Family have moved to Salem and Wilbur, the eldest son, is having trouble settling in. After a fight with his father, Phil, Wilbur is being forced to take his younger brother Tommy trick-or-treating and the two brothers sneak into the Witches Cottage which has now been turned into a museum.

The cottage is typical. Lots of cobweds, smells bad. Oh, and there's a candle on display in the middle of the room with a sign that says DANGER ABSOLUTELY UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD YOU LIGHT THIS CANDLE PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS HOLY DO NOT LIGHT THIS CANDLE I'M LITERALLY BEGGING YOU.

So naturally Wilbur lights it.

And this inadvertently resurrects century old witches who want revenge on the town for killing them. Oh and they also want to eat children's souls. And gosh by luck should have it, there's a blonde child right there waiting for them.

After setting off the sprinklers, saving Tommy and stealing a weird looking spell book, Wilbur gets the fuck out of there only to find a pig who can apparently talk and uses that ability to call Wilbur a complete fucking idiot for lighting that candle, he goes by the name Techno.

Techno leads the brothers to an old cemetery because Dream, George and Sapnap cannot step foot on hallowed ground. Here, he shows them the grave of his sister and a man named Sam, who used to aid the witches back in the day but betrayed them and was consequently killed by Dream and had his mouth sewn shut so he couldn't tell their secrets, even in death. He tells them of his life, of what happened to him and his sister and the curse he is under and he warns Wilbur to protect Tommy at all costs because you don't know how much someone means to you until theyre gone.

Techno informs them that the witches spell only lasts on Halloween, and unless they suck the soul out of at least one child they will turn to dust when the sun rises.

Meanwhile, the Dream Team try to adjust to the modern world, resulting in some shenanigans as they though some child dressed as a devil was Satan Himself and that a road was just a very deep black river.

(Dream, standing just at the line where grass becomes tarmac: what the fuck is this??

George: Looks like a river, a really deep river

Dream: How can we be sure?

Sapnap: *literally just standing there*

Dream:

George:

They push Sapnap onto the road, resulting is lots of screaming and claims that he can't swim and that he's going to drown. Only for him to realises he's still just standing there.)

Anyway. Eventually, they catch up to out ragtag band of hero's, and Dream raises the dead body of Sam to chase them on foot where they cannot step.

After a close chase with Zombie Sam, Wilbur decides to be a responsible big brother and go find his parents who are attending a big Halloween party at City Hall. Tommy tells him he's being stupid and they can take on the witches - or, as he cleverly calls them, the bitches - all by themselves. But, nonetheless, the brothers plus a talking pig make it to City Hall. Unfortunately, so do the Dream Team.

(This scene is my favourite part of the actual movie and perhaps its just because I Put a Spell on You is my favourite song but anyways-)

Wilbur, unsuccessfully, tries to convince his father and the towns folk that the witches are back but Dream preforms an absolutely stellar performance of I Put a Spell on You (with George and Sapnap as back ups, of course) and all the partygoers are enchanting to dance until they day.

Running out of options, the trio run to the high school where Tommy has the bright idea to burn them alive. And it works! Using Tommy they lure Dream, George and Sapnap into the kiln and set the bitches ablaze. Woo! Day saved!

Or so they think.

Thinking that the danger has passed, Wilbur studies through the pages of the spellbook to find away to reverse the curse on Techno and turn him back to human, unknowning that the spellbook alerts the witches of their whereabouts and the Dream Team track them down, kidnapping Tommy and taking back the spellbook in the process.

Flying above town Sapnap casts a spell over the town which lures all the children in town towards the cottage.

Frantic, Wilbur and Techno plot a way to retrieve Tommy - because Phil is going to put him six feet under if he comes home from being enchanted at that party to find that Tommy has been taken and killed by a trio of century old witches. Using car headlights, they manage to convince the Dream Team that sunrise comes an hour early and in their panic, Wilbur grabs Tommy just before the witches can suck the rest of his soul and escapes back to the cemetery to wait out until sunrise but they are ambushed by Sam, who uses a sharp piece of glass to cut the stitches on his mouth and then yell the head off Dream.

The witches attack, and Dream attempts to use the last bit of potion to suck the rest of Tommy's soul but Techno snatches it off him and gives it to Wilbur. In an attempt to save his brother, Wilbur drinks the potion so the witches have to take him instead of Tommy which Dream is more than happy to do if it means he gets to live.

But just as Wilbur is about to die, Tommy screaming in the background as he fends off Sapnap and George, the sun rises causing Dream to fall onto the hallowed ground of the cemetery and turn into a stone statue, while George and Sapnap get caught in the light and disintegrate into dust.

With the witches gone, the curse that has been held over Techno for centuries has been lifted and his pig body dies, leaving the spirit of the man he once was to be reunited with his sister in the afterlife. Sam returns to his grave, now able to rest in peace.

The partygoers awake from their enchantment, completely unaware of anything that transpired. The children of the town return to their beds.

And Wilbur burns the spellbook with the same lighter he used to light the candle that started this whole thing, then he and Tommy walk home.