5 Phases Of Missing You

5 Phases of Missing You

1. Like a drug addict. All craving and obsession. 

2. Like a drug addict in withdrawal. Violently. Constantly. 

3. Like missing summer. Fingers crossed and longing. Knowing there is nothing I can do to bring you back around but wait for the world to keep turning. Wait for fate to decide.

3. Like missing summer. Meaning sometimes I forget to miss you at all, until I look outside and realize you are no longer there, and fall asleep to images of you leaking into my dreams. 

4. Like missing childhood. Knowingly and resentfully and kindly. Wishing I had made more of it when I had it. Realizing I will never have it back now. Trying to recreate it, recapture it always. But it is gone. 

4. Like missing childhood. You left me with scars and fond memories. But you are gone. 

4. Like missing childhood. I miss it quietly and softly and out of the blue. But it is gone. 

5. Like missing hiccups. Remembering the way breathing hurt when you showed up for 5 solid minutes before youd disappear for however long you pleased. Remembering you were always annoying as hell whenever you decided to show up and wrack my body and leave me breathless. 

5. I miss you like hiccups. Meaning I don’t. 

Hiding Happiness

You would be surprised to know all the ways in which one can hide happiness. 

Have you ever seen Happiness burn? It crackles silently. Smoke that smells like love. It burns quickly but goes up in the most brilliantly coloured flames you have ever seen, that is, if you can catch a glimpse before it disappears. Like it was never there at all. 

After all, you cannot hide something, that no longer exists. 

Mother, I am scared I cannot sleep There is a monster under my bed In the closet In my head It is all the things I have left unsaid It wears the most terrifying face of regret And whispers to most vile things Of everything that could have been It smells of sorrow and leaks puddles of tears Yet it never moves Like it is frozen in time Staring off at some distance thing Right through me As if it knows I am the one who has created it As though it knows I am the one who keeps it trapped here                                As though it can see all that would have been Just right there behind me But it never moves. This is what scares me most

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Me Thinking About Shadow Me Being Released Today

The funny thing about two artists being in love is that sometimes they both agree to look away from the fact that maybe they were both just in it for the inspiration.

The Universe's Sense of Humor

I don't like the way we said goodbye.

All The Things I Never Told You, All The Things I Will Never Get to Tell You