9 Months Sober - Tumblr Posts

This.

My 4 year relationship ended because he got tired of my debilitating depression and didn’t know how to help me other than kicking me out and making my mom’s house the only place I could go.

After years of threatening to leave and not leaving, he gave me the false hope, made me think we could survive it. But he bailed and I was left to pick up the pieces on my own.

Sure it was for the best cuz neither of us were mentally well, cocooned together in my misery, but I keep thinking, if he had the strength to leave sooner (cuz obvs my BPD and codependent ass wasn’t going anywhere), not keep making those empty threats that just sent me spiraling further down waiting for it to be true, maybe I would have been better by now.

You say you're not "threatening" to leave me, that you WILL leave me if I don't change. You've been saying that for years more and more. I don't understand why you don't just leave instead of making me think I have a chance and staying out of guilt and pity. I don't like being lied to just so you don't hurt me because you think I'll destroy myself. What's meant to be is meant to be.