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Flying Dutchman macaroni recipe

I'm not gonna lie, this is a bad one. It is cursed, it is massive, it will leave you sweating, gasping and hoping for it to never happen again, but still being drawn to its mysterious aura. Behold, my creation and my forbidden love.

It's as bad as it looks. This is the shit to make if you need a quick fill that will last you a whole day - you can make this as a breakfast, unload a truck of bricks, have a break for tea and biscuits, unload a second truck, and be a bit peckish in the evening. Here's a breakdown of this thing's nutritional value:

1. carbs - yes

2. fats - you can make it drip or dry

3. protein - hELLA

If you're like meatstuffs - this is for you. So here's a recipe for

Flying Dutchman macaroni

(because pirates are gay)

(good for them)

This requires some time to prepare, but you can prepare ingredients in bulk for use later. There are three parts to this dish: the macaroni, the meat and the curse.

The macaroni is simple - anything fits, boil in salted water for as long as the packaging says. Can be enjoyed separately, some freaks even dip them in honey or nutella. I'm not joking.

The meat is where the interesting stuff hides. The simple way is the best - oil the pan, dump and mix some minced meat, chopped onion and tomato sauce, fry and stir until just standing near the pan makes you cry. Salt and season with whatever tickles your pickle. Choose a meat to your preference, I have no opportunity to check any vegan meats unfortunately. You can also add vegetables per your own taste - tomatoes, sweet peppers, carrots all work well.

The curse is in the making - oil or butter the pan, dump a small serving of macaroni, add the meat (2 parts meat to 3 parts macaroni works best for me, but depends on added vegetables and personal taste), add two fresh eggs, mix and stir until done. The eggs are the gamemaker that makes it all work and can be customized to taste. If you want it juicy and soft - wait until egg has coated the whole thing and becomes slightly opaque. Otherwise - fry until it's nice and chunky. You can enhance the curse by adding whatever comes to your mind - soft cheese before the egg, more tomato sauce after egg is done, parmesan on the prepared dish. The more the merrier. The whole thing goes down smooth with sour milk. Enjoy and may the sea have mercy on our soul.