Bg3 Video - Tumblr Posts
Used
Astarion x Y/N - drabble - 1.1K WC
Masterlist
Warnings: violence, trauma, Astarion's past mentioned, betrayal, hurt/comfort
--------------------------
“Look, I had a plan. A nice, simple plan - seduce you, sleep with you, manipulate your feelings so you’d never turn on me. It was easy - instinctive…” Astarion spoke.
As soon as he said those words your ears started ringing. Your breath hitched and you could feel you eyes well up with tears. He used you. All you could hear was your heartbeat in your ears. Your fists balled up and before you knew it your legs were stomping towards Astarion. His face flashed with confusion before your fist collided with him. He stumbled back, you pushed him even more so he would fall down. He looked up at you as he held his aching cheek and bloodied lip.
“How could you?” you asked in a shaky whisper. You felt the tears slip down your cheeks despite the hurt and angry resolve your face held. You looked at him, waiting for an answer.
His eyes were soft, he wanted to apologize. He wanted to beg for you to listen, to understand. But how could he? He had hurt you the same way people had hurt him for 200 years. How were you supposed to forgive him when he would never forgive those who had hurt him this way? “I’m sorry…” he spoke softly.
“Not good enough.” you said to him, shrugging in defeat before you walked away.
-------------------------------
“Y/N, you need to eat…” Karlach said quietly as she slid the new platter of food next to the untouched one from the day before.
You kept your eyes shut, pretending to be asleep so you didn’t have to endure a lecture.
Karlach sighed before pulling your blanket over your shoulders. She brushed a few hairs out of your face before placing a kiss on your forehead. Her hand caressed your cheek for a moment before she walked out, leaving you to rest.
Your eyes attached themselves to the ceiling as you laid there. This was day 6 of rotting in your bedroll. You pulled gently at a flap in the tent, ever so slightly letting a beam of light radiate in. You raised your hand to it, letting the warmth hit your dull skin.
“Y/N?” said Astarion from the entrance of your tent.
“Go away Astarion.” you said back plainly.
“Please, I’m begging you, let me explain.” he said. You could hear the need in his voice, the need to be understood.
You sat up swiftly, “What is there to explain? You fucked me so I would keep you safe. End of story.” your eyes were sharp and narrowed in on him.
“You’re right…” Astarion said, inching himself into the tent a bit more.
Your eyebrows raised, you expected excuses to flow out of him. But this?
“You’re right and I am so sorry… so ashamed. You have every right to be angry. I used you and caused you pain that I can never take back. I know what it’s like to be a victim like that. And… in the moment, it just seemed like the logical thing to do.” Astarion’s eyes held so much sincerity, you had never seen them so genuine and vulnerable. “I won’t ask for your forgiveness, but I just needed you to know how sorry I am.”
You nodded at him, the lump in your throat preventing you from verbalizing anything. You laid back down, rolling to face away from him. You heard him walk away after a few moments.
Karlach returned to your tent after Astarion had left. “I know you’re not asleep.” she said, sitting down next to you.
“Maybe I just enjoy you tucking me in.” you said, cracking a smile at her.
She chuckled at you, pushing stray hair from your eyes after you sat up. “He is sorry. I’m not saying forgive him, what he did was beyond shitty. But I may or may not have given him Scopo Wisp in his tea last night, he’s telling the truth.”
“You drugged him for me, how thoughtful.” you said sarcastically.
“Oh spare me. You act like I was digging for dirt, all he spoke about was you and how much he regrets everything. How much he…” she trailed off, her eyes flicking up to yours.
“How much he…?” you reiterated questioningly.
“You just need to talk to each other. Preferably without punching him in the face.”
You shrugged, “No promises.” You stood slowly, your bones popping and muscles stretching.
“Good luck soldier!” she said encouragingly.
You walked to Astarion’s tent and heard… sniffling? You peeked inside. Astarion had his legs drawn up to his chest. His arms held himself close and his chin rested on his knees. You could see the tears on his cheeks despite how far you were from him. You quietly cast a spell, having purple shimmers fall around him. Astarion yawned before he laid down, falling into a pleasant and much needed slumber. You walked inside, pulling his blanket over him. You brushed a few white curls from his face.
“Y/N?” he mumbled, his eyes still closed.
“Shhhh, you’re alright. Go to sleep.” you ghosted your hand over his cheek, trying to comfort him.
Astarion’s breathing returned to normal. You watched him for ages, eventually laying down next to him. “I was furious with you, ya know? I wanted to do way more than punch you. But now… now I’m just a little hurt. I understand you, but that doesn’t take away the pain I feel.” you let out a sigh, trying to convey your feelings to the sleeping elf.
“I just… I was… starting to fall in love with you. Foolish, I know. And… I think I still do. Love you, that is. I’m not sure what to do with all these conflicting feelings but… Just know, I don’t hate you.” you finished, playing with a loose thread on your top, venting to him.
Your chin was tilted up gently, taking your breath away. Astarion placed a ghostly kiss upon your lips. Barely touching and yet you felt what he was trying to convey. “I’m so sorry.” he whispered onto your lips.
You shook your head slightly before you moved to hold his face, “Leave it in the past?” you asked, searching his eyes.
He nodded fervently, “Thank you, little love.”
You smiled at him, “Can I stay?” you whispered.
He nodded, holding your hand before his breathing evened out. You quickly followed, sleeping soundly after the many days of tossing and turning.
“I love you, my sweet.” he said, kissing your forehead. Now he just needs to work up the courage to tell you while you were awake.
Little did he know, your heart doubled in size at his confession.
-----------------------
Naboo's Note:
FUCK I am so sleep deprived. Hope this is a good one y'all. I'm about to go have a Xanax (PRESCRIBED) induced coma and it's going to be glorious. Will try to write again soon, work is busy af rn tho so pleaseeeeeeeeeee be patient. Thanks as always for the likes, comments, reblogs and requests!
Humanity
Astarion x Y/N - drabble - 1.3K WC
Masterlist
Warnings: TW!! self harm, blood, cutting, soft Astarion, not glorifying self harm it is a real problem people struggle with myself included, angst, hurt/comfort
-------------------------
Astarion constantly smelt blood when he was around you. Given all the adventuring and your general clumsiness he assumed you always had a scrape somewhere. You were quite odd to him. Skittish, afraid of the world. And yet, you were kind as could be. Always helping, sometimes to your detriment. He couldn’t quite discern what he felt towards you. You annoyed him beyond belief. But heaven forbid anyone say anything remotely negative about you and suddenly he had a knife at their throat. You were… complicated. To say the least.
He saw the pain in your eyes, the same pain Abdirak mentioned the day Astarion met you. He knew how introverted you were and how the smallest things could have you blushing. He often used it to his advantage when he needed to persuade the others. You almost always sided with him, naively. He couldn’t tell what you felt for him, which frustrated him further. You never fell for the obvious seduction. Even when he asked you to his bedroll at the tiefling party; you blushed violently before stuttering an excuse to get away from him. He didn’t see you the rest of the night and when you were at camp the next morning he thought nothing of it. He noticed how often you were alone, how distant your face looked when you thought nobody was looking. He could always see the lack of sleep under your eyes, the hollowing of your cheeks as your eating was disordered. You had an air of melancholy around you when you weren't actively being the sunshine of camp. He never knew how to approach you when you were so obviously in pain. He wanted to care, but he himself was afraid of what caring for you might stir inside him.
Tonight he sat at his tent, reading and drinking his usual red. Everyone had seemingly retired for the night, only his and your tents remained illuminated by candles. He glanced at your tent every now and then, wondering what you were up to. Suddenly, he watched you walk out of your tent, you headed for the lake. Astarion assumed you were going to wash so he left you be. That was until he smelled your blood, fresh. So fresh you were likely still bleeding. He listened closely as he stood to make his way to you. Your heart beat was even. How were you so calm if you were bleeding? He made his way to the lake stealthily. Not wanting to alert whatever was hurting you so he would have an advantage over it.
What he saw stopped him in his tracks. There you sat, your legs partially in the lake while you sliced little cuts into your right thigh. With each new cut you watched the blood trickle and ooze before splashing your leg with water and repeating the process. He could hear your random sniffles, he could see the tears that flowed down your cheeks shine in the dim moonlight.
“Oh my sweet…” he gasped out before cautiously making his way to you.
You heard a twig snap a few feet from behind you. Your first instinct took over and you immediately cast sanctuary on yourself. There was no way you could fight something with muscle right now. All you had was your magic. Your eyes widened in horror when they met Astarion’s.
He tried not to look, he really did. But your flowy white night shirt was seeping up the blood from your upper thigh, while the lower cuts bled down your leg. He was horrified in his own way. The purest soul, so selfless and sweet, insufferably kind - was hurting themself. He opened his mouth before shutting it again, not knowing what to say. He tore his eyes from your leg. Your eyes were round and full of fear. Your waterline was ready to burst with tears but you willed them to stay put.
“Please don’t tell the others.” you whispered after a moment.
Everything was so still, except you. You were shaking. Astarion carefully stepped towards you. When you didn’t retreat, which he fully expected you to do, he softly held your arms. Supporting you physically, he could feel the way you trembled. You reminded him of a frightened animal. And here you were being supported by a natural predator. His throat clenched despite him having no intention of biting you or drinking from you. His pupils dilated, the smell alone called to his savage, vampiric nature.
“I won’t.” He said back sincerely. “What happened, little love?”
You nudge your head into his chest, unable to speak with the current lump in your throat. You weren’t brave enough to look at him. You didn’t want to see the pity, or disgust. Astarion slowly walked you back a few paces to sit you on a rock.
“Stay.” he said before you watched him use transmutation to blink to gods know where. He vanished for only a moment before he reappeared in the very same fashion he vanished. He held a small parcel in his hand. You shifted your legs facing them away from him. He put a gentle, cold hand on your knee, tilting you to face him.
His fingers worked diligently. He focused on the larger cuts before the smaller ones. “You wont need any stitches…” he said, mostly to himself but smiled slightly when he saw you watching him.
You closed your eyes, slightly relieved. “I… I’ve been doing this since I was 12. But this is the first time someone else has… seen them. I thought I was so clever…” you finished with a watery laugh.
“You don’t owe me an explanation, darling. Pain is pain. It manifests differently in us all.” he whispered as he laid the large pad of gauze over your cuts. You winced, sucking in a sharp breath. “I know, I know sweetheart. Just breathe for me…” he said, holding your leg in place as he gently but quickly wrapped your leg in gauze. Your small whimpers that you tried to hold back were like a hammer to his heart, cracking a little more with every whine.
“All done.” he said, letting go of you. You hissed as you pulled your knees up.
You felt the angry red skin beneath the bandages, heat radiating from it. You nodded at him, “Thank you…” you mumbled.
Astarion finally felt his thirst subside slightly. He sat across from you, waiting for you to speak, if you wanted to.
“I feel like I’m getting the bad out when I do it. All the hate and malice and pain… just goes with each cut.” you mumbled, not looking at him, your hands fidgeting with your sleeves.
“I understand. I think most people hurt themselves in one way or another to relieve themselves. Life is too difficult not to. Your preferred method is just a bit more obvious than others. This doesn’t make you bad or unworthy. This just makes you… human.” Astarion said, sincerity laced every word.
You stifled a small laugh, you weren’t human, but you understood the sentiment. He understood your humanity. “I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with all this…” you said, your heart hurt just thinking about how strange and possibly traumatic this is for Astarion.
He waved his hand absentmindedly, “Think nothing of it, darling. I am always happy to be here for you, in any way you need me.” he gently took your hand.
You smiled at him. He stood before he picked you up bridal style, his inhuman strength on full display as he carried you back to camp. You watched him look between your tents before he walked to yours. Placing you gently on the bedroll, careful not to bump your sensitive leg. He started to get up but your hand caught his wrist.
“Could you stay?” you asked, not entirely sure why.
“Of course. Sleep now, and in the morning I’ll buy you a delicious little health potion and…” he said, eyeing you to see what else you could want.
“Cake?” you said.
Ah, your sweet tooth, another trait he secretly adored. “Cake it is, dear one.” he watched you wrap yourself around his waist before drifting off rather quickly. He watched you fondly, moving a bit of hair from your face every once in a while.
------------------
Naboo's Note:
Hello all! I hope everyone is well. This is a bit of a heavier fic but I think it might be a new personal favorite. Quite a bit of the behaviors described are derived from reality. Felt a little therapeutic to write this somehow? Idk if it is weird let me know an I'll take it down ASAP. Thanks for the likes, comments, reblogs, and requests. XOXOXOXO!
Awesome piece of animation art 🤯 Reels by alindraws