Billy Hargrove X Female Reader - Tumblr Posts

Never Again

the five times he saw you with bruises and the one time you saw him with bruises.

pairing: billy hargrove x thicc!reader (f)

word count 8.9k

note: reader has thick thighs and stretch marks, i'd rather jump off a bridge than write about characters with "perfect bodies" ew. also im chubby and i dont remember what it was like to be skinny. ok ms thiccums. also readers birthday is in winter shh. this is sort of an au where billy got left back a year and he still works at pool, steves at record store and billys alive. billys a little bit ooc but who cares lmao

playlist. moodboard.

warnings!: abuse!, domestic abuse, violence, sexual assault mentioned, mention of ro*fie/date drug, assault, fighting, bullying, depression, loneliness, anxiety, a LOT of swearing/cursing, making out (?) etc... fluff, comfort, angst.

i. - yn pov

The cold wind kissed my skin as I stepped off the dingy school bus and toward Hawkins High. My backpack slung over my shoulder as I tug on my flannels sleeves and fidget with anxiety, walking through, past the other students that seemed to enjoy loitering. Another miserable day in hell. My combat boots smack the concrete as I enter the building, escaping from the chilly temperature into the stuffy halls and heading straight for my locker. I grab my notebook to place it in my backpack and put away my winter coat. Having earbuds in, I don’t hear the obnoxious smacking of gum and tapping of tacky flats coming toward me. Not till her hand pushes me toward the wall. One of my headphones was knocked out.

“I’m talking to you, new girl!” The voice was impossible to not recognize. Turning around to make eye contact and confirm my theory, I send a distasteful glare to Carol.

“And yet, I can’t seem to give a fuck.” I was never one to let popular kids knock me around. Seemingly everyone bullies and annoys me with ease, but I always defend myself. I only don’t speak when their whole purpose is to get a rise out of me.

Her expression changes from annoyed to offense and fury. “Listen, slut. Either you explain why you stole my bracelet and give it back or I will fuck you up.”

Raising a brow I looked down at my wrist where I had my grandmother's silver bracelet wrapped around and chuckled at the insane accusation. “This is my grandma’s, dumbass. I didn’t take your stupid fucking bracelet.”

“I beg to fucking differ, it’s one of a kind!” She yells, catching the attention of other passerbys in the hills. Suddenly I’m filled with rage as she raises her voice at me.

“Clearly not. I’m not dealing with this right now, it’s too early.” I go to walk away and escape the conversation when suddenly she grabs and tugs my arm. I land on the ground, hard, on my back.

“Nuh-uh, not till you give it back!” She straddles me, holding my hands down with her knees and starts throwing punches. “Give it back!”

How do I give it “back” if you’re holding me down, dumbass!

This was ridiculous. I was almost embarrassed for the girl. She actually threw punches… over a bracelet. It all happened so fast. My eye burned and my face was sore and my lip was stinging. Then someone came behind Carol and pulled her off of me. My face was warm and I took deep breaths. I could feel blood dripping out of my nose and my lip was busted. I swallow hard and taste blood on my tongue before rising to sit up. My vision was blurry but I could see a shape of what seemed to be Tommy pulling Carol away, the yelling reverberating in my ears. Behind me I feel someone place an arm on my back and under my knees, lifting me and carrying me toward the nurses office.

I try to see who lifted me but as we pass the bright lights in the halls, my eyes get irritated and I shut them quickly. The person is warm and I feel denim gently scraping my arm. I don’t need to wonder for long as I hear his voice. “Jesus, L/N. It’s not even twelve yet and you already got a beating?”

“Shut up, Hargrove.” My voice is so weak it surprises me. His name is even more bitter than the blood on my tongue.

“It’s almost a new record. Not one to be proud of. But it's something, sugar.”

Billy Hargrove and I constantly bickered. I hated him and he hated me but not enough to not want to get in my pants. We were often associated as his stupid friends frequently beat me to hell and he beat my guy friends. I envy him. Everyone absolutely adores him. I can pretend I don’t care about being liked but deep down, there's this irritating desire to be loved. But someone, anyone. The fear that if my own mother doesn’t love me, why would anyone else?

Billy was perfect. He was attractive, fit, and the Hawkins High king. He hardly even needed to try. And me? I was the nobody.

I hated him for it.

“I’d rather you left me on the floor, Billy!” When I wiggle to try and escape his arms, his grip only gets tighter.

He scoffs as he opens the nurse’s office door with his foot. “Don’t be so dramatic, shortcake.”

I’m sitting on a medical cot as I hear the clicking of the nurse’s heels rushing toward me. “Oh my- what happened, hun?”

I assumed Billy left the room as I explained I was in a fight to Nurse Jen. Why would he stay? But after the teacher cleaned my eyes and I was able to blink them open, I see him sitting there across the room, watching with crossed arms and a brooding stare as the nurse dabbed at my bruises. I raise a brow at him and he only sends a sly grin in response. When the nurse finishes up with my bruises and busted lip, she looks up at me with soft brown eyes. “Can you have someone drive you home?”

“I’ll take her home,” She and I turned to Billy as he spoke. “Still live out of town?”

I nod softly, surprised he remembered that from the party a few months ago that my best friend dragged me to. He had to drive me home and dropped me off after someone tried to roofie me. As I said, this school is hell.

The nurse nods, grabbing my hand and helping pull me up. At first, it was like it all rushed to my head, the world began to spin, blurring slightly. It cleared quickly and I stumbled slightly. Billy rushes forward to grab my arms and hold me up. Surprisingly, his expression is filled with genuine concern. “Alright, c’mon, L/N.” He lifts me up just as he did before and carries me out to the car. The nurse left me with an ice pack for my head and packet of bandaids. What the fuck do I do with this? Billy sets me down in the passenger seat of his camaro. He begins driving after a heavy sigh. Who would’ve thought I’d wake up, go to school, get my ass kicked, and then get driven home by Billy Hargrove. I giggle childishly at the thought while staring out the window. “What’re you laughing at, sugar?”

“This is… not at all what I expected from my day…” I shake my head and frown. “Billy Hargrove, the man who hates me for everything but my tits, driving me home.”

He scoffs, “Is that how you think of me? Really?”

I nod fervently, wincing as it hurt my jaw. “Absolutely.”

He’s silent. Just for a moment. “Jesus, that’s… a low point of view.”

“Well, you never really treated me with a high regard… not till this moment and that party a few weeks ago. You aren’t really that nice to me. You’re just snarky and pervy.” I continue to mumble under my breath about how everyone is always mean to me but Billy isn’t listening after what I said about him.

He stares blankly to the road before him as he drives. The radio buzzing silently and I purse my busted lips as I look over to him. His gaze is concentrated and pensive. “I’m not that shitty of a person, Y/N.”

I swallow hard. “Sure.”

“I’m not!” He seemed genuinely angry, sincerely aggravated. “I have fuckin’ morals.”

“Then quit whining and act like it.” I huff, leaning to look out the window. He grunts, choosing to keep quiet and ignore me.

The rest of the car ride is silent. One hour of complete silence, other than the light sound of Metallica playing on the radio. I dozed off but every time I’d feel my eyes close, Billy shoved me, mumbling something about “concussions.”

Pulling up to my house, I rush to get out but Billy darts to my side of the car. “What’re you doing?” I say, shocked.

“You can hardly walk, sugar. I’m helping you get inside safely.” His tone is sarcastic but intentions are pure. I would roll my eyes if they didn’t hurt so much.

I let him help walk me inside my house. My parents were at work and I’m secretly grateful for Billy driving me. My mother would’ve screamed at me for making her drive all the way back and maybe even done worse. As I sit on my mattress, I look to Billy who helped me up the stairs, through the pavement and drove me from school and finally I gathered the courage. “Billy…” He looks into my eyes after finding pain relievers in my drawer and placing them on my bedside table. His blue eyes were hypnotizing and I finally understood why all the girls fawned over him. “Thank you. You don’t understand how much you just helped me.” I give him a small, warm smile.

His gaze flips between my eyes and lips before he takes a deep breath, “Don’t thank me, sweetheart, it’s the least I can do. Lemme go get you some water. You got any snacks or pajamas I can bring you so you don’t have to get up too much?”

I nod carefully. Billy was being soft. He was gentle and kind. I guess he’s trying to show his morals like I suggested. “In the drawer, top shelf is my jammies, there's chips in the kitchen. I-I’m only allowed to eat the potato chips, though…”

He nods, not asking too much. He grabs the pajamas from my drawer, a large t-shirt that I stole from my ex, and sweatpants. He laid it on the bed and left for the water and chips. Quickly, I got dressed and tucked myself under the blankets. Billy was quick, walking into my room with a bag of chips and a glass of water. He placed it on the bedside table and I quickly took the pain relievers with a large gulp of water. He looks around my room, his eyes landing on a book, journal and pencil on the desk in the corner of my room. He grabs them and places them beside me. “Do some reading and drawing or something and get some rest in like two hours.You don’t wanna get a concussion, trust me.”

I laugh, dryly. “Thank you, Hargrove.”

“When do your parents get back?”

“Uh, depends. My dad comes back around nine and my mom… My mom varies. It could be six on a good day or midnight on a bad day.” I sigh, grasping the book before opening to where I left off.

His brows furrowed and I saw the expression on his face shift as he tried to decide whether he should ask questions or not. He chooses not. “Okay… make sure not to get into trouble? See you around, sugar.” He ruffled my hair and just like that, he left.

ii. - yn pov

I didn’t want to come to this party but my best and only friend Rachel had forced me here. Well, more so, threatened to leave me home alone with my mother. So there I stood, next to a bowl of spiked punch, as people sent judgemental glances my way. I was completely fine minding my own business, till a pretty girl with a ponytail so tight it practically pulled her hairline out. I recognized her as… Natalie? Nicole? One of those for sure… “You’re the new girl, right? The one who stole Carol's bracelet?” Her speech was slurred and she seemingly was clueless to the concept of personal space.

“I’m new but I didn’t steal Carol's bracelet. If she told you otherwise then she’s a lying, delusional bitch.” Okay, maybe it was harsh. However I couldn't find it in me to care at the moment. I wanted to go to sleep.

She snarled her red lips and with a bitter tone, “Well, that ‘b-word’ is my friend so watch what you say, freak. What are you even doing here? I didn’t know they were inviting losers?”

With a sarcastic smile, I cross my arms, “Aw! Well, duh! That's why they invited you, silly!”

She gasps before clenching her teeth, “At least I’m not a virgin with no freaking friends.”

It was so easy to piss these people off, I didn’t need to put in the effort of getting physical. But I was so very tired and restless, I wasn’t in the mood frankly. I just grabbed her pretty and oh so perfect blonde ponytail and dumped her head in the spiked punch bowl. When she pulled back, she wiped the punch out her eyes and screeched. “Whore!” Huh, so she can curse.

“But I thought I was a virgin?” I send a snarky smile to the brat. Bad idea.

She tackled me and pathetically smacked me while straddling me. It wasn't as bad as Carol, however I still had some bruises staining my skin, so it hurt. And this time, I had my hands to cover me. It wasn’t enough though as she smacked me harder and harder. The crowd just chanted “fight, fight, fight” before someone finally pulled the rabid beast off me. I sighed heavily before trudging out the door.

My thoughts race. I’d rather walk home than stay there a second later. I don’t care if my house is twenty minutes away by car and forty walking. Rachel can yell at me in the morning, I don’t care.

But just as I make it to a street corner after fifteen minutes of walking, I notice a light shining behind me. The street has been empty since I first started walking so, out of curiosity, I turned to check who it may be.

“Oh my god.” I rolled my eyes as I noticed the familiar camaro driving toward me. “Do you just have a sixth sense or something?”

“Another beating, Y/N? Jesus, that's two in under a month, what happened?” Billy leans his head out the car. The street corner was getting cold so I stuck my head in the car to sneak some warmth.

“Well, Nicole was being disrespectful so I shoved her face in a bowl of punch and she decided to assault me. Plain and simple, Hargrove. Care to give me another ride home, please? I really don’t wanna walk in heels and bruises.” I pout, slight playful flirtation in my eyes as he rolls his and tilts his head to motion me to hop in.

I giggled at the music choice. “What's funny?”

“You’re playing metallica again, it’s like fuckin’ deja vu.”

He laughs, shaking his head, “I can’t believe you can laugh when you look like you’ve been fucking run over. You get into too many fights. I’m being serious, it’s reckless and dangerous, sugar. You gotta stop.” He scolds me like a child.

I huff, sarcastically, “Okay, dad. Since when did you give a fuck what I do? Figured you couldn't care less.”

“Like I said last time, I got morals. If I see someone who doesn’t deserve a beating all bruised up, it's pretty upsetting, shortcake.”

I laugh, sarcastically. “Well, you’re surely getting better at showing it. Seriously, do you think carrying my bag for me to two classes is gonna make me think you have morals? Or saying bless you when I sneeze? That's just manners, Hargrove, I’m concerned you just started saying bless you and thank you to people. It's basic respect.”

He stops, rather aggressively, in the middle of the empty road. “Don’t you talk to me about respect like you’re my fucking father. You can't seem to avoid getting your ass kicked, what are you a child? Desperate for attention? A masochist? What? What's wrong with you that you so desperately need to get assaulted every day? Mommy not giving you enough attention at home?”

That felt like a slap across the face. Especially since my mother couldn’t care less if someone hit me. She’d fully support it. The comment made my eyes water, every word leading me closer and closer to the tears that started rolling down my rosy and bruised cheeks. His angry expressions alter to one of shock and perhaps even a flash of guilt. He opened his mouth to speak but he was speechless as I cried silently beside him. “Fuck you, Hargrove.”

He bit his pursed lip and started driving again. It was quiet for a bit till he gathered his courage to speak again. “Listen… that… that wasn't cool of me. I’m-I am… sorry. That was fucked up. I shouldn’t have said that. I just-I don’t like seeing you like this. I don’t know why. It really fucking bothers me though.”

The word sorry sounded like he choked just trying to get it out. He was so clearly not used to apologizing however I couldn’t find it in me to care. He tried. And it seemed genuine. That impressed me more than I could imagine. “Just… take me home please.”

The rest of the drive is silent till he’s pulling over in front of my house again. I catch my breath and wipe my tears as Billy hops out and walks to the passenger seat, opening the door for me. It was chivalrous and honestly surprising. I looked at him with a questioning gaze as he walked me to my door. Mentally, I celebrated being able to walk, unlike last time. “Hey, I was wondering … that shirt you wore last time? Where did you get it from? It looked familiar.”

I raise a brow at his question. “Uh, its my ex boyfriend’s. I never threw it out and he never picked it up so I just… kept it? I guess.”

He hums. “Here…” He pulls his denim jacket off and hands it to me before tugging his white shirt off and swapping that for the denim jacket. “Wear that… It’s really weird to wear your ex’s clothing. Creepy.” I can see him visibly gulp.

“Yeah?” With a lopsided grin on my face, I look down at the white t-shirt in my hands. Then I met his hypnotizing blue eyes once more. They were filled with something indescribable. Something different from the usual lust, gloom and humor that filled them. Something I didn’t quite understand yet. “You’re really confusing, Billy Hargrove.”

He laughs. It was a nice laugh too, I'll admit. Still hate him though, definitely. Definitely hate him, Mhm. “Tell me about it, Y/N L/N.” He raises both brows, looking between my eyes then my lips before walking backwards. “See ya’ round, shortcake. I gotta go find my sister, stay out of trouble, please.”

“See ya’.” There's a part of me that celebrates seeing him go, then some forbidden, sadistic, masochistic part if me cries deep down and begs him to come back mentally. “Asshole.”

iii. - third pov

Billy started acting weird.

Whenever Y/N passed him in the hall, he ignored her.

No snarky remarks or flirtatious lines. He stopped being cruel to his sister, he waited more patiently for her after school. He was using manners with teachers and other students and actually showed up for class. He was doing better in school in general and he showed up on time. She’d find him watching her when she’d look up to find who was burning a gaze into her flesh. It was always him. But when she tried to speak to him, he gave one word answers and walked away claiming he had something to do.

You’re really confusing, Billy Hargrove.

Tell me about it.

He’s playing with my feelings. Her thoughts race. Except there are no feelings, I definitely hate him. Right? So why does it hurt when he ignores me? When he passes without a word or a glance. Why did it give me butterflies when I caught him looking at me or how, not so discreetly, looked over in the morning to see if I got off the bus before going in just to know if I was around. What would he do if I wasn’t? Why did I want to know? Was it so strange to miss our dynamic? Our banter?

Nonetheless, she continued her life as usual. Weekdays were school till three, work at the arcade till six, taking the bus home, shower, sleep. Weekends were work from seven to three, taking the bus home, yoga, shower, study, sleep. She only had about one or two friends, so there wasn’t much “hanging out” squeezed in. Except there was a disruption in her schedule on this particular day. Saturday. Noon. In front of the arcade, Max is sitting beside Y/N with a deep frown on her lips.

Max came in at her usual eleven in the morning and all went smoothly till some grown man came and gave her trouble for “hogging” the machine. So, in an attempt to defend her, Y/N walked up and asked him to leave. Which resulted in a bruised cheekbone, split lip and broken wrist. Now they sit on the curb, waiting for Max’s brother to pick her up so Y/N can go to the hospital and receive treatment.

“Are you sure Billy will take me? He didn’t seem too happy last time he saw me all bruised up…”

His words imprinted in her memory, joined by those blue eyes that filled with concern. If I see someone who doesn’t deserve a beating all bruised up, it's pretty upsetting, shortcake.

“Last time?” The redhead's eyebrow quirks.

“Yeah, he gave me a ride once… twice. Whatever, just… are you sure he won't be mad?” Worry lacing her tone.

“It’ll be fine, Y/N/N,” She takes a pause, placing a hand on Y/N’s knee. “And who cares what that asshole thinks anyway?”

The older girl releases a small laugh, “Yeah, who cares…” She did. She cared too much. She didn’t know when it happened or how. She couldn’t even admit to herself that it had. But she grew fond of the blond curlyhead casanova.

“And also… I didn’t get to say thank you. No one really defends me like that… You looked really badass, at least.” Max giggles.

With a pained smile, “No problem, kiddo. I can’t believe he broke my wrist, though, that's still so crazy to me.”

“Yeah, that was crazy. Hey, your eyeliner is still intact?” The statement was more of a question as she questionably clung onto whatever she had in mind to cheer Y/N up.

The pair giggle till the familiar rumble of Billy’s camaro can be heard speeding toward the arcade. It skids to a stop and Billy comes rushing out the car toward the duo, who stood quickly. “What the fuck happened, Y/N? Didn’t I tell you to be careful?”

“Hard to remember what you said when you haven’t even acknowledged me till this moment.”

“Sweetheart, It's hard to not acknowledge such a hot chick so don’t spout such bullshit. No what the fuck is going on with your wrist?” He goes to grab her wrist but she yelps in pain and he pulls back quickly, his previously flirtatious expression filled with genuine concern.

“The dude broke it…” She had broken wrists before. He had broken legs, ribs, jaw, arms, feet, fingers. She’s had numerous broken bones, fractures, sprains. She wasn’t too panicked about the wrist. But the pain never felt nice.

His eyes flash back to hers, anger spirling her new favorite shade of blue, “Dude? A fucking guy did it? Is he still here?”

“No, he… he left.” She looks him up and down. He was wearing a red button up and she could see a peak of his chest. His cheeks flushed red in anger, and Max? She was thriving. She hasn’t felt so joyous in years. Suddenly it all made sense. Why Billy was so nice, so respectful, so much… happier?

Her.

“Okay… let’s go. I gotta get you to a hospital.”

Max sat in the back and her bright blue eyes flicked between the two sat in the front. Curious and intrigued, she hung on every second.

“Do you have an addiction to getting your ass kicked?”

“I guess so.”

More silence.

He looks at her and then back to the road. Then he takes a double take. “You look good in my shirt, by the way.”

It was then she realized she was wearing the very shirt he gave her off his back the last time they actually spoke. “Thanks.”

Max covered her mouth to disguise her smile.

Billy actually likes someone? And it's Y/N?!

“Y’know… I’m probably gonna get fired. I’m really gonna need a new job. Actually, to be honest… I pay the majority of the rent at my house… My mom… she doesn’t really…” Y/N clears her throat as she chokes a sob that threatens to leave her with teary eyes. “She doesn’t really pay rent. She works but… not for rent.” She wipes her face with her unbroken wrist. Then wiping the tears on her jeans.

Billy could feel his heart drop at the sound of her broken voice. “I’ll help you get a job. I promise. I’ll see if you can work at the pool with me or maybe I could get Harrington to let you work at the record store. I will help get you a job.”

She let out an exhale and a laugh, “Did you know the first day where you found me all bruised up in December… It was my birthday. I turned eighteen. No one said anything. Except for Max and my best friend. My own mother forgot. Or she just didn’t care.”

She was staring blankly at the road. All Billy could get out was a weak apology as he reached over to grasp her unbroken hand. Max beamed.

As they parked in front of the hospital, Y/N stepped out. “You sure you don’t want me to come with you?” Max thought her cheeks were gonna break by how wide her smile became. He’s worried, how cute.

“I’m fine, Hargrove. Now, just… I’ll see you Monday, okay? Don’t… don’t ignore me?”

“I won’t, I promise.”

“You made a lot of promises today, hope you mean 'em’.” She smiled and walked into the emergency room. Max quickly ran out of the car to switch to the front seat and buckled in with a massive grin on her face and a “I-know-your-secrets” glare in her eyes.

“Oh god, what now, Max?”

“So… In love with Y/N, are we?” She smirked, tilting her head. “No wonder you’re so nice.”

He scrunched his face in mock disgust. “What? No! She’s just- We’re just kind of… friends now, I guess. It’s platonic.”

“Really? You held her hand and Oh Y/N I’ll get you a job, I promise, I’ll protect you, My princess, where is she? I care so much about you! Oh! I love you so much-” Her mocking tone and giggling was cut short as Billy suddenly stepped on the gas suddenly. Her laughing only intensifies.

“Shut up! It’s not like that. She’s just… Okay, I never met anyone as incredible or strong and unpredictable. She is the funniest, smartest yet somehow densest person I know and I don’t know if I wanna scream or kiss her but she’s the strongest most fucking irresistable woman I know and I have to stay away from her or else I get all these… emotions… I guess, that I can’t fucking deal with, okay? But it’s just… temporary. We’re platonic!” He just sounded like a contradicting machine that wanted to convince itself of a lie.

Max grinned one last time. “Sure, Billy, sure.”

iv. - third pov

Max’s joy only lasted a week.

Billy made an effort to speak to her but everytime he grew awkward. It was unfamiliar to him. And Y/N? Max hardly recognizes her. Her wrist was covered in a white cast with blue wrapping and the bruises she received at the arcade were healing well. But she was limping. She was covering her face. She was wearing long sleeves, even though it was now March and the weather was warming. It worried Max. Poor girl didn’t know what to do. So she went to Billy. Told him her concerns.

“What do you mean limping?“

“Limping! What else does it mean?” Even in serious conversations, her sarcasm never failed. “It’s been really warm lately and she still wears that black hoodie and sweatpants. She’s hot cause she always asks for the air conditioner so I don’t know why she doesn’t just take it off unless…”

“Don’t…”His heart kicked up, “You think… you think more bruises?”

“Yeah or she did something herself….” She frowns in concern. Shaking his head, thoughts filling with the worst of the worst, he begnis marching down the halls, searching for his shortcake.

He bumps into Carol who squeaks like a mouse and stumbles. “Billy, what the fuck?”

“Have you seen Y/N?” He was frantic.

“Who-?”

“Y/N! Have you seen Y/N!” Carol was startled till an expression of realization overtook her features.

“Oh! New girl?” She shook her head, “No, I haven’t seen her today-“

“Then you’re useless. And she’s not even fucking new, she’s been in this school longer than me, Catherine.” He rolls his eyes and begins walking once again.

“It’s Carol-“

He walked completely off, effectively cutting her off and sending a simple message. You’re irrelevant.

Finally catching a glimpse of a girl in a black hoodie and sweatpants, he grips her shoulder and tugs her into the nearest supply closet. “Take off your hoodie.”

“Woah, I know you’re a horny bastard, Hargrove but at least ask me to dinner first-” She chuckles, rolling her shoulders.

“I’m not kidding, Y/N. Take off your hoodie or explain.” His expression was stern in the dimly lit closet.

Silence. It was then they noticed the closed space, they were so close that one inch forward and their noses would touch. She could explore his blue eyes and well defined facial structure, the spiral of his curls and count his freckles and he could sink in her eyes and imagine the taste of her lips. God, he can’t stop staring at her lips. But he grasped her chin and tilted her head side to side to observe a few new fade bruises, she smacked his hand. She stares at him with a blank expression. “There's just… it’s just… more bruises. Nothing serious.”

Scoffing, “From who?”

Shaking her head. This one was different. She couldn’t tell him who did this one. “Billy, I’m not comfortable talking about this right now. Okay? It's really personal and I-I just want to get through the day so I can go to sleep. Even if everyday on the bus home is like a sentence to hell…” She mumbled the last sentence, raising her able hand to brush a strand behind her ear.

“Why? What's at home?”

“Nothing… just my mom and I never really got along well. It's nothing bad, just frustrating.” His eyes had not looked at hers since the silence. His eyes have been trained to her lips. Watching her form every syllable. “You know, I got eyes you can look at, too, right?” She smirked.

“I-I am looking at your eyes, you just can’t tell 'cause it's dark.” His eyes flick to hers.

“If we’re calling my lips my eyes then sure!” She tilts her head playfully. The air in the small closet was tight and hotter and hotter by the second.

He smirked, “Well, about taking your hoodie off…” His hands tug on her collar to push her body closer to his. She scoffs and pushes him to the wall.

“In your dreams, Hargrove.” She walks out the enclosed space but Billy follows close behind.

“I’m just saying, if all this time I just had to take you to dinner, I would’ve done it long ago!” He walks side by side with her. “No, but seriously, if it's personal then that's okay. I understand, just, y’know Max told me who broke your wrist and now he has a concussion so…”

She stops abruptly and turns to him. “What?”

“I figured out it was Bryce Turner so I found him at his job and knocked him out, no big deal,” He shrugs, “He hurt you, that's not right.”

She looks at him, entirely suspicious. “What the hell changed? You see me bruised up once or twice and suddenly you care about me as a person? Suddenly you defend me? What the hell, Billy?”

He exhales, heavily, glancing around the halls. “Can we not talk about this here? It’s really not that serious, I just know how it feels to take a beating, I’ve been in a few fights myself if you can’t tell.”

Shaking her head, “No, a few months ago, you couldn’t fucking stand me. You only bared my presence to get a chance to fuck me. So, is this just a trick? This is all an act, this new you? Is it real? Or is this an elaborate plan to fuck me, Billy? Because I’m sick of everyone in my life using me.”

He opened his mouth to speak but he didn’t know how to tell her. He couldn’t tell her. He shakes his head, “I’m not trying to use you, it’s… it’s unrelated. I promise. I’m sorry I made you feel that way, though.”

Sharing blank stares, she bites her lip. “Another promise, hm?” He bows his head. “See ya’, Billy.”

She wanders off from him, off to her next class. He’s left alone in a crowded hallway, heart sunk to his stomach and a new anxiety he didn’t appreciate.

v. - yn pov

Sobbing uncontrollably on a Sunday night, walking in the rain to Billy Hargrove’s house at two in the morning was not my ideal experience. But my life never went according to plan.

The cut on my lip down my chin and bleeding nose was evidence enough, let alone the numerous fresh black and blue marks covering my cheeks and body. A solid handprint outlined in red on my wrist when she yanked me toward the front door. My tailbone still ached from when I fell ass first into the pavement. She screams demanding me to leave “her” house, even though I pay the majority of the rent.

My ribs were healing well from the last time she hit me but after her recent blows, they ached and stung. My wrist is still wrapped in a cast that shouldn’t be wet. My ankle, that she had smashed on the wooden ground when I refused to get out of bed and she dragged me off it, now had shards and fragments of glass lodged in the arch of my foot from the vase she had thrown at my foot. The wet concrete was incredulously painful against my feet which were clad in only socks. My mother doesn’t really think to give me shoes before throwing me out. She just knows she wants me out and doesn’t care what condition I’m in whilst “out.”

It was humiliating to be walking towards Billy Hargrove’s house for support, for help, for comfort. When in September he and I hated each other. Sure, he tried to seduce me but that was a joke. No one found me attractive, he was making fun of me. Right? So, why in December, on my birthday that no one ever celebrated, did he lift me in his arms and help me get medical attention? Why did he care? That's what I clung onto as I took steps closer and closer to his house. The bright hope lying in that memory. Billy Hargrove cared even a little bit.

I didn’t really have anyone else. My best friend was in Florida visiting her grandmother and all my family was in New York. All I had was Billy.

His door was intimidating, but my body shivered so aggressively and my heart thumped so heavily I realized I had no choice. With eyes filled with many tears, my vision was blurry, my throat dry, body wrenched and my heart aching… I knocked on his door. The sound hardly made it over Metallica playing faintly through the door, the only sign other than the turned on living room light that he was there.

I knock again. “Jesus, M… can’t you, at least… door?” I could hear him faintly through the door. Suddenly, it swung open and there he stood. A red button-up tucked into jeans clung to his frame well. His expression switched from anger to shock and concern.

“Y/N, what- what the fuck happened?”

“I-I’m so-so sorry, Billy… I don’t have anywhere to go, I just- I would’ve called but I can’t get in my house so I- I just walked her and I- fuck, I just need help, please!” Each word came out with a choked sob. He gently grabbed my elbow and, with a softness I couldn’t imagine ever coming from him, he pulled me in for a hug. “Billy, y-you’re gonna get wet-”

“Jesus, I don’t care. C’mon, let me take care of you. We’re lucky my parents are gone.”

***

After gently taking out the shard in my foot with a tweezer, and asking Max for her tweezer in the first place, he gave me some medical alcohol, ointments, bandages and wraps to use after a shower. He even gave me a new wrist cast, which I’d have to ask later why he has it. He left me another one of his shirts and a pair of his boxers while he let me take a shower. When I got out, he was wearing a t-shirt and boxers. There were too white mugs and chocolate chip cookies on the coffee table as well as a mountain of VHS tapes. He was wrapped in a red blanket and his foot tapped anxiously on the wooden ground. This is new… certainly not unwelcome but new.

“Uhm, thank you…”

His head snapped in my direction at the sound of my voice.

“Did you walk here?”

“Oh- uh, yeah… more so limp but yeah…”

“Jesus Christ, Y/N, what's going on? Who did this to you? I’ve never seen you cry like that, it… it hurt and I got really scared for you… are you okay?” His eyes were always so pretty to me. How the blue could tell so much about him, what he was feeling, thinking. I could see so much truth to his words, so much concern.

Sighing, I bite the bullet. Its stupid, but I really trusted Billy. “My mom has been like this since I was ten…” I train my eyes to the ground. The pattern of the wood was far less horrific than those gorgeous azure eyes. “Ever since my biological dad left, she just…changed. She likes to drink. All her money goes to that. I basically hold up everything rent wise and financially… I want to forget her tonight, please. I’ve been so scared and… and tired for so long. I feel strange and stupid for telling you this but its not like I have many friends or anyone you can tell that would ruin my life so fuck it… I really just don't wanna think about her… okay?”

The silence after my words is what motivated me to gather the courage to meet his eyes. Pursed lips and a sigh, Billy looks back at me. “Yeah. Okay, whatever you need, shortcake.”

I give a curt nod, “Thank you,” I sniffle and look at the table, “What’s all this?”

“Oh, well, I asked Max for some of her VHS tapes and she made cookies with Susan before she left this morning so… I thought… maybe, these would make you feel better? And I made her swear to keep this a secret and not tell any of her little shit friends.” His cheeks actually turn a shade of red and I let out a giggle as I sit beside him. He tosses the blanket over my head. “Don’t laugh at me, I’m trying to be nice!”

“Okay, okay!” I pick up the VHS tapes and shuffle through them. The Shining, Nightmare on Elm Street, Carrie, The Breakfast Club, The Outsiders…

“Lets watch Nightmare on Elm Street…Johnny Depp is pretty…” I giggled and bit my bottom lip.

“Wow, okay, am I not?” with a faux hurt expression, he lifted a hand to his chest and smirked.

Rolling my eyes, “That’s not what I said…”

Raising a brow, “So, you’re saying I’m pretty?”

“Yes, Billy Hargrove. You are a beautiful man.”

His smirk shifts into a soft smile, “Thank you, you’re beautiful yourself, babe.”

New nickname, adding that to my list of favorites.

“Thank you. Seriously.” I hand him the VHS to put on and lean back. I pull the blanket to cover my bruised stretch marks. “I would’ve called before coming but… y’know.”

He places a hand on my cheek. “You and I… are more alike than you think, sugar. No matter how awful you think I am… I will always care about you. I know I’m an asshole but… you kind of changed my life with all these marks and trouble. You’re… you’re my favorite type of trouble.”

It was like my insides were melting and I swallowed hard, my heartbeat speeding up. “Really?”

His thumb brushes against my cheek as he nods. “Absolutely.”

“That’s… really cheesy,” I giggle, embarrassed, “But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think it was sweet. You’re my favorite trouble, too, Billy.”

A brief moment of silence as he looked down to my lips. It was like time stopped and I swallowed my heart. “Can I kiss you, sugar?”

Briefly, my eyes widen before whispering, “Please…”

His lips touch mine instantly, they are soft but urgent. Slipping his tongue past my lips, I feel my body erupt into flames. I place my hands on his thighs and I hear him drop the VHS before he puts both hands on my cheeks. He was so warm, so soft, yet his kiss was so needy and deeply affectionate. My broken wrist remains on his thigh but my other hand moves to run my fingers into the back of his hair, gripping gently. He groans and I swear, I felt my heart stop. That's when he pulled away and I caught a glimpse of his glazed eyes and slicken lips.

“I could do that everyday, for the rest of time…” he muttered. I couldn’t tell if he was speaking to me but I didn’t care. I could hardly focus on anything but the sweltering joy growing in the very pit of my stomach.

Our moment is interrupted by a small voice clearing their throat. I drop my hand to my lap. We look over to see Max with a smirk on her face, red hair pulled into braids. “I knew you liked her, you idiot!”

“Get out!” He grumbled.

She simply laughed, unphased, “No, no. Thank you, now Dustin owes me fifteen dollars!” She runs to her room, presumably to grab that darn walky talky.

With a small smile, I raised a questioning brow and scrunched my nose. “You like me?”

Rolling his eyes, he picks up the VHS and moves to put the movie on. “No… yes. I don’t know…” He plopped back on the sofa. “C-can we just watch the movie …?” Oh, how I love to make him blush and stutter….

I giggled and intertwined my fingers with his. “If it's any consolation, I like you. I like you a lot, Billy Hargrove.”

His blue eyes brimming with adoration. He nods, enthusiastically. “Okay… yeah. I like you a whole lot….”

vi. - billy pov

Y/N went back home the next day. It had been four weeks since that night and I still haven’t kissed her again. I’ve been afraid to touch her lips again. I know she said she likes me. But I also know I’m not good enough for her. I only just started to be nicer to Max. I only just started to try. So, I went back to pushing her away.

But the night was young and I already found myself covered in bruises and blood seeped through my shirt. Although the weather was cold, there was a thin line of sweat covering my skin as I drove down the streets to the one person in the world who didn’t make me feel like shit. The one person who made me feel like I meant something. The night was filled with bloody fists, tears and screaming matches. But she was full of love, care and a gentleness that I could never get at home.

As I park out her house, I see her light is the only one on.

With a deep breath, I climb the tree in front of her window and peer into her room. She’s lying on the bed under the covers, a book in her hands. I purse my lips and knock on her window softly. Her head turns toward the window. slightly startled, her expression instantly fills with concern and that damn look she always gives me that always makes me feel warm. She pulls the covers off and instantly rushes to the window, I instantly notice something. She’s wearing my shirt.

She always looks so good in my shirts, god, she drives me crazy.

She slides the window up and I meet her eyes. “Billy, what-what are you doing here?!”

“Uh, if you let me in, I’ll explain everything…” She nods, shifting over to the side to let me in.

I climb into her room and sit on her bed, the creaking of the window shutting numbed out in my numerous chaotic thoughts. Suddenly, she’s beside me, running her fingers through my curls and placing her now healed hand on my thigh. “Talk to me, Billy. What’s wrong? I’ve never seen you cry…”

Biting my bottom lip, I briefly muster the balls to meet her eyes before looking back at her carpet. “Remember when you came to my house at two in the morning?” She nods. “Remember when I said we were alike?”

You and I… are more alike than you think, sugar.

She nods, warily.

“My dad… he punishes me. Harshly. He… he does it a lot but tonight, I guess I really got on his nerves. He blamed me for my mom leaving and kicked me out the house. I know I’ve been a piece of shit lately but with all these feelings I have for you and the shit my dad says… I can’t find it in me to put you through all my bullshit. But here I am… I don’t fucking know, I can’t stay away from you… I’m sorry. You’re… all I got, sugar.” My eyes filled with tears once again, the millionth time of the night. Her fingers reach up to wipe my tears and I lean into the warmth of her hand.

“It's not your fault.” She simply states. Not a second of hesitation, not an ounce of doubt.

“What?”

“Your mother leaving, Hargrove. That's not your fault. And as for us? We’re fine, just don’t ignore me. It’s not up to you whether I ‘deal with your shit’ and don't talk about yourself like that. You’re fucking incredible. I like you for a reason, dummy. Anyway, you're safe here. I’ll take care of you.” I look up when she stands and walks toward her door. I almost whined thinking she was leaving, but she locks the door and walks back toward me.

“Jacket and pants off, c’mon, time for bed.” I laugh, dryly, her determination to take care of me making my heart palpitate. I begin to undress, uncomfortably in my bruised state and she reaches in her bedside drawer and pulls out a first aid kit. “Lie down.”

I do as the lady says and lie flat like a starfish in the center of her bed. She sits beside me and opens the kit, beginning to treat me. I take it as an opportunity to admire her features. From her hair to her lips to my shirt on her body. She smelled wonderful. Like a dewy spring morning. Her lips looked shiny after her tongue swiped across them. She finishes and brushes a few stray strands of hair out of my face. “I really do like you, Billy. Don’t leave me in the dark like that ever again, okay?”

I nod. At this moment, as I look at her face, I realize I’d do anything she asks. “Whatever you want, babe.”

She shut the light off and slipped under the covers, I followed suit. There was a brief pause of comfortable silence. Till I got to thinking. I never felt such an intense feeling, relationship, trust, experience. She was an acid trip. She was peace. She was heaven and she was chaos. She was everything and I was set on living for my everything. It was at this moment I realized why I had felt so protective, so needy for her attention, so caring, careful and intrigued, so pliable and submissive to her every whim.

I had fallen in love.

This wasn’t good. The moment I realized it, it was like it was fighting to get out. Like it needed to get out before it grew more and broke my heart. She’d leave me, just like my mother.

But the voices, the doubt, it didn’t matter when I felt her shit beside me and her voice relaxed me like melatonin or a cup of tea in the morning. I was more of a beer and party at night but god, I could get behind this feeling. This indescribable high she had me set on. I was absolutely in love with her. I adored her. I was enamored. Max was right. It pissed me off beyond words… but holy shit, Max was absolutely right. I was head over heels and it was fucking terrifying.

“Are you okay, Billy? Do you need anything? Water? Food? Maybe clothes? I could steal some of my stepdads clothes… or you could wear some of my oversized stuff-”

“I’m good, princess. Thank you. I just… I really need to tell you something.” It was gonna come out. It had to. It had to or I was going to explode. I roll over to face her, only to find that she was already facing me. Even in the dark, I could trace her features. It was committed to memory. Imprinted in his mind. I certainly didn’t hate it. “Y/N. Don’t laugh. Okay? If you laugh, I’ll leave and sleep in my car.”

She nods. “Okay, Billy, just spit it out!”

“Fine. I-I… I love you. Like… love-love you. Like I wanna kiss you and hold you and hold your hand. I wanna… maybe… I don’t know, get married one day and live far, far away together. All by ourselves, happily alone…”

It was quiet. From what I could see in the dark, under the streak of moonlight hitting her just right, she was shocked. Her bottom lip pulled under her teeth. “I love you, too. I want all of that and more, Billy… but you can’t ignore me. Okay? Talk to me… I just wanna be there with you. For you.”

I have never smiled that big since I was kid, surfing in the waves with mom.

“Run away with me.” My voice was soft as I stared mindlessly at her lips.

“Billy…” She sounded cynical as she shook her head.

“C’mon. We both hate this town!” I place a hand on her hip.

“Think about what's here, though. Max. School. My best friend. Billy, be logical!” She was always so smart. So careful and meticulous. But I wasn’t having it. We could worry about the details and kinks later. For now. I just wanted to convince her to get away with me.

“I am! We’ll leave after graduation. I’ll save up money to get us someplace nice far away. Maybe back to Cali or we can even go to New York. I’ll go wherever, as long as it’s with you. So they can never touch us again, okay? Never again.”

Another beat of silence.

“Fuck… fine! Okay!” I celebrate with a mouthed ‘yes’ and a fist to the air, she rolls her eyes. “I hate the effect you have on me, Billy Hargrove.”

“Oh please! Get over here…” I wrap my arms around her, pulling her into me and smothering my face in her hair, taking a whiff of the scent and smiling brightly. I pull back to place my lips on hers, gently. Reveling in the feeling of her lips on mine again after far too long. “I love you so much.”

Sure, we can just be dumb teenagers with stupid plans.

“I love you more.”

But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t okay with that. Especially not when the cold wind of Hawkins kisses my skin as it brushes through the small crack in the window and I doze off, holding my love in my arms.

A Second Chance | Billy Hargrove, The Bassist.

Warnings: Second Chance, Modern!Band! AU, Bassist! Billy, Designer! Reader.

Billy had never believed in love. His parents never loved each other, never showed him what love was, and he never knew how to show it, at least not until he met the most important people in his life: his friends. They were always there for him, they cried together, laughed together and made messes together. He loved them all equally, except for her. A beautiful, jovial, cheerful, sarcastic and very, very, outgoing girl. Billy loved her, no, he adored her, she was the love of his life. When they started dating, they both couldn't even contain their excitement. Billy was just making his debut on Midnight, his fame wasn't big yet, but he was satisfied with his life, but, unlike him, that jovial girl he loved so much didn't think so. She loved him, very much, and she knew that, if he stayed by her side, his fans would not stand for it. She knew this environment well, and she could not allow herself to be a nuisance for Billy, to fulfill that dream that excited him so much. That's why, one of those many nights when they stayed together at each other's house, she made the horrible decision to leave him a letter with a clear and concise message: 'We broke up, please don't look for me'. And so, without a second thought, she fled his side forever, leaving Billy torn up inside, with hundreds of questions and zero answers. Now, years later, their past seems to haunt them relentlessly, something that, for both of them, causes them indescribable fear and desire.

"I see we meet again," Billy said, walking up to your side with a glass of wine in his hand.

"I'm afraid so" despite your immense urge to vomit, you took your whole glass in one sip, trying not to expel it out of your mouth the instant after.

"We have a lot to talk about" he looked at you, fixed and deep. The guilt began to return, too strong, too sudden.

"No, we have nothing to talk about" you set the cup down on the marble balcony, afraid to use too much force, but it didn't break, so you just went on your way. Or at least you tried to.

"You know better" Billy stopped you, taking your wrist firmly, but without hurting you.

He pulled you close to him, too close for your liking, too close for your heart. He was afraid you'd leave him again, that you'd go away without explanation, that you'd be just a passing person in his life, leaving a mess in his.

"I deserve an explanation" his warm forehead collided with yours. Their breaths mingled and your lips parted. You wanted to tell him, you wanted him to know, but the fear was greater, your desire to run away was even more so, "just...don't leave me, not again."

(The red ones are seen from your point of view, the black ones are narrated from Billy's point of view). After the epilogue there will be a description of the character that is with Billy and her name (this is because in the other parts of Midnight series the character appears and could be confused with the reader of that story) anyway, I will avoid as much as possible the important physical descriptions like skin color, eyes, hair, etc.

Him | The Day I Left You.

Her Voice | Ghost Memories.

His Eyes | I Want To See Them Bright.

Her Freckles | My Heart Beat Again.

His Hair | This Is My truth.

Her Smile | Enlighten My Life, Stay With Me.

His Love | All Of Me.

Her | "Us".

Midnight Masterlist.

𝐃𝐔𝐌𝐁 𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘 ; b. hargrove x bimbo!fem!reader

summary : billy loves calling you his dumb lil baby, always so pretty and perfect for him. he loves how you willingly let him take you anywhere, anytime. but be especially loves when you go dumb on his dick.

warnings : nsfw, mean dom!billy, edging, overstim, thigh riding, p in v, unprotected sex, semi – public sex, degradation of you squint, dacryphilia.

days like today were billy's favourite. days when you'd come and visit him on those cute little swimsuits, and bat your lashes innocently at him and ask "how's work billy? wanted to come 'nd visit you."

when the two of you would sit by the pool and talk about your day — you absolutely refusing to swim, since it would ruin your mascara, and you came to see him anyway.

other girls would give you looks, dirty looks, but they'd fly over your head and you'd simply smile and wave at them. he loved hearing you talk, eyes focused on your glossy lips.

you'd happily talk about anything and everything, and billy would happily listen. sometimes he'd try and coax you into the pool, but you'd adamantly decline.

"don't wanna swim," you'd whine, resting your head on his shoulder. "just wanna spend time with my boyfriend 'nd talk while sitting on the side of pool."

as you were now, looking at him with your doe eyes. "my makeup took to long, billy. i don't wanna ruin it after tryna look good for you. then it'd be a waste of time."

he smiles, pulling you in for a sloppy kiss and messing up the gloss you'd applied so carefully to your lips. "i think you look gorgeous with ruined make up, baby." he leans in, kissing up against the shell of your ear and nipping gently at the skin. "i can even ruin it for you, if you like."

you pout, or try to, trying to push him off you. "but billy~!" you whine, gasping quietly when he begins to suck at your neck. "you always do this.. at some point you need to start fixing it for me. not everyone is gonna think i look pretty with ruined make up."

"who gives a shit about what people think," he'd groan into your nape, biting harshly and marking you up.

and you know as well as he does that you can't say no to him. so you let him drag you to the bathrooms and pull you into an empty stall, mouths pressing together feverishly as his hands sink down to your tits.

his tits.

in a flash your bikini top — that honestly was so skimpy it wasn't there to begin with — is tossed away somewhere, and his hands are kneading your breasts, nipples between his fingers. you moan into his mouth, grinding your hot sex onto his thigh.

"so needy, thought you didn't want this," he murmurs, but he doesn't stop you from grinding. instead he smirks, quickly sitting himself on the toilet seat and positioning you on his thigh. "get yourself off, baby. wanna see how needy you are."

your hips move on their own, grinding your clothed clothed heat against his bare thigh, shorts pulled up just enough for you to rut against the exposed skin. your eyes shut in pleasure and you moan quietly, gradually humping this thigh.

billy huffs, hands on your waist as he forces you to quicken your pace. you cry out at the sudden surge of friction, but the boy only scoffs in response.

"how's my dumb lil bitch supposed to feel good of she's moving her hips so slow, huh?" you simply moan in response, and billy slips in finger between your folds. "you're so fucking wet. thought my pretty baby didn't want this? does my lil whore want to stop?"

you sob loudly, shaking your head as you grind against his fingers and his thigh. it's all too much, but you don't want to stop. billy just chuckles. "words, baby. or my dumb bitch feeling to good, huh? haven't even done anything and you're all fucked out."

you whine, nodding as you call out his name. his fingers retreat, instead finding place in your mouth. "since you aren't using that mouth, let's put it good use." you suck intently, billy's free hand kneading your ass.

you don't know how long you've been grinding onto him for, but eventually enough is enough and you can feel your orgasm on the horizon. it's so close, and you babble as such, repeatedly moaning around billy's fingers.

and just as you feel it coming, it's ripped away when billy's grip on your waist tightens, other hand flying down as well, preventing you from moving your hips any more. fat tears roll down your face as you whine into his neck, desperately bucking your hips to try and get some friction. "b-billy, please. wanna cum, was so close!"

he hums, thinking it over for a moment, before he's forcing your hips to start moving again. it feels as though everything's on fire, heat surging through your body as your cunt messily drools all over billy's bare thigh.

you're face is wet with tears as you feel your high approach for a second time, moans coming out high pitched and broken. billy loves you like this, lips capturing yours in a sloppy kiss.

you're close once more, whining into his mouth as you feverishly buck your hips. it's coming, coming, and then..

it's gone again.

you're choking and hiccuping, billy pressing his lips to your tear stained cheeks. "poor dumb baby," he coos. "wanna cum? you'll only cum if it's in my cock, babe, so you better beg for me to fuck you."

you don't say anything for a moment, before your broken, whiny voice reaches billy's ears. "please? i wanna— i need to cum! wanna g–go all dumb on your— on your cock! please~!"

if you were paying attention, and your eyes weren't so blurred with tears, you'd have notice billy pulling at his shorts just enough to free his drippy cock. catching the skin of your neck between his teeth, he pushes your bikini bottoms to the side and slams himself into you.

he's sure everyone in hawkins heard you scream his name when he did.

he's pumping steadily in and out of you, kissing away your tears as you cry on top of him, moaning his name over and over like a broken record.

you cum way before he does, a string of curses leaving your mouth as you did so. but billy doesn't stop, relishing in your slurred begs for him to "stop. s'too much! can't do it!"

he doesn't listen, thrusting fluidly into your fluttering hole, groaning loudly into your neck as his cock begins to twitch inside you. "gonna cum sweetheart. wanna cum inside my dumb baby's lil cunt. can i cum in you, baby?"

you nod limply, sobbing into his neck as he lets himself go inside of you, warm spurts of cum filling you up. only then, when he's fully released his load, does billy finally let you rest.

you're still slurring and babbling, billy kissing your forehead and trying to calm you down, cooing softly. "you're alright baby, you're alright. so pretty when you cry, but it's done now, okay."

he loved making you his dumb little baby, but he'd always take care of you after as you whimpered into his chest.

The Player and The Cheerleader

Billy Hargrove x Cheerleader Reader

Summary: All Billy thinks cheerleading is that's it's just flips and splits. The view changes when he has a run in with a certain Hawkins High School cheerleader.

...........................................................................

Billy didn't care for anyone by any means. Either it be in Indiana or California. If he doesn't see you as someone worth his time then he didn't talk to you or give you the time of day. One of those groups in specific were cheerleaders. From his point of view they were only pretty girls to look at, that's pretty much how everyone treated the cheerleader at this point. Pretty things to look at.

The cheerleaders sometimes had to share the gym with the basketball team. Which did peeve some the guys on the team but as long as the cheerleaders were pretty they could handle it. But there was one odd ball on the cheer team, the captain. Always mouthing off the players when they got to close to the cheerleaders or a ball got to close to hitting one of them.

"Hey! Shit for brains!" A voice can be heard from then other side of the gym. "I thought the point of the game was to get the ball in the basket?!"

"Jeezu..." Tommy huffed. "Can you seriously be pissed about the same thing every time? It's just a ball." He answered to you. Clearly tired of your constant shouting at the basketball team when a ball would go the wrong way.

"And it's just balls between your legs, and they can just as easily deflate." You sassed back. To Billy, it was almost comical to watch. You with the tough guy act, puffing up your chest to a dude way taller than you with colorful pompoms in each hand on your hips.

"What a bitch..." Tommy huffed again.

"Oh get over it." Billy snapped. "What's captain pompoms gonna do?" He laughed at his own statement. Like said before he found the whole conversation comical-

WHAM!

A basketball went flying right into Billy Hargroves head. He snapped his head around to see the who had the nerve to hit him. His eyes met with captain pompoms. The two had a stare off. That's what it felt like for the rest of practice. The two practically eyeing each other the entire time.

After that stunt was over, after constant staring at one another, Billy had only one reaction in mind. A big one.

The next day followed. Billy knew where he could cut you off and corner you, in-between Mr. Johnson's chemistry class and Mrs. Shoffer's English literature class. It happened fast no one could react to it, actually you doubt anyone saw it happen. What you thought was just another normal day of school turned out to be more than that. A harsh hold took your arm, taking you away from the crowd into the more secluded part of the hall. Where you came face to face with a fuming Billy. His jaw was clenched and eyes held anger.

"What, you think you're real funny for the shit you pulled yesterday?" He interrogated. "Try it again see what fuckin happens..." His threats did not stop. Well his empty threats. As much as you are terrified of what he could do, you knew he'd never act on them. Your brave front was standing strong. Taking in every threat, comment, and remark he could throw at you. To get a reaction, if you were a guy you would have answered with your fists at his first remark. But you are not. You are you. You knew the exact thing that would make him even more angry.

" You are nothing but scuff on the gym floor, and that's all you will be."

Billy did not like that one bit. Who does this bitch think she is? His fist rose into the air, readying to strike. The force came down, you felt the air brush past your face, to only make contact with a metal locker. The sound ricocheted through the hall.

You open up your eyes. Now, again, staring at him. Anger was not held in his eyes anymore. If was fear and sadness, to you it was peculiar expression to see on his face. The actions that just happened finally caught up to you, you inhale deeply not knowing you stopped breathing. Everything caught up to you.

SLAP! Your hand came down, striking Billy Hargrove in the face. Hard enough to leave a mark. Not knowing that one had just been healed from another hand. "What the hell is your problem?" You yelled, agitated. "God, you fuckin creep." You make your way back to your class leaving Billy stunned. He didn't know what to do. He has never had someone react to him like that before. It intrigued him. He had an interest in you now.

After that encounter Billy made it his mission yo agitate you as much as possible. I mean, how else are you supposed to show someone you like them. From poking you with a pencil in class, purposefully missing the hoop so the ball bounces into your direction, anything at all just so you could look at him. He was succeeding and he was royally pissing you off. Until on fateful autumn day, everyone had gone home for the day. Except for the extracurriculars that took place after school. Two of those being basketball and cheer practice. Just as the practices were about to start, Billy took notice that you weren't with the cheer team. Which he thought was odd, but instead he chose to go smoke a cigarette before practice. He made his way to the small alley like way that was outside the gym that lead to the track field. And the sight before him made him stop in his tracks. there you stood cheer practice outfit and all with a lit cigarette hanging from your lip.

"I thought cheerleaders didn't smoke?" Billy joked to you, giving you his famous smirk.

"And I thought shit stayed in toilets, but I guess I was wrong since you're here." You said taking a huff of your cig.

"Damn, always ready with a comeback are you?" Billy said, lighting his cigarette.

"Why are you messing with me Hargrove?"

"Ouch, last name basis now sweets?"

"Shut up." You won't deny it, that dumb nickname that he started calling you grew on you. "Is this because of me smacking you?"

"No."

"Was it me hitting you with a basketball?"

"No." He said blankly again.

"Then what is it?"

Billy took a huff of his cigarette then looked you in your eyes. No hate or anger, something you can only describe as adoration.

"I find you interesting." Was his only answer.

"What?" you were confused by this answer. What was so interesting about you that made Billy intrigued. " Your like curious about me or something?"

"Exactly."

"You know curiosity killed the cat, Hargrove." You sassed.

"And satisfaction brought it back, and I am not satisfied yet so get used to me sweets." He said taking his cig a stomping it out onto the ground walking away.

You grumbled at his response, inhaling the last of your cigarette with blushing cheeks. Stomping out your cigarette then making your way into practice. 'Why does this asswipe make me blush'.

...........................................................................

Weeks of this teasing have gone by. Everyday Billy would find a new way to make you mad, blush, or embarrassed to get a reaction out of you. He claimed "It's because you so cute." Which made you blush even more. Gosh, you couldn't stand half of the guys at this school. Why was Billy the only one making you feel this way?

Truth be told, Billy had seen you around way before he had met you. How you walk down the hall with your head held high, looking away in disgust at the "popular" kids, over all not conforming to what a cheerleader is by Hawkins view point. You fought, yelled, got in people faces. Billy love all of it, it made him excited. Excited to talk to you and ask you questions, even ones you deem are stupid. All he wanted to do was to be around you. Damn, he loved it in a way.

Practice had ended for the day leading off into the weekend. A light rain pour had come down, everyone else had a ride to get them home. Everyone except you, well you did but he was running very late. Billy made his way outside to find you standing in the walk way waiting to be picked up. Cigarette hanging from your mouth.

"What are you doing here?" Billy asked.

"Waiting." You simply put.

"Do you want a ride?" He asked.

"No, I have a ride." You said. "But he's running late."

"What your boyfriend?" Billy said, the words had jealousy behind them.

"No." You sighed. "My brother you dipshit."

"oh..." He sighed. A silence fell between you two. Not uncomfortable, but nice enough for you two to be around each other. But Billy had something building in his stomach, a nervous feeling. He hated it. He needed to tell you something.

"Hey." He called to you, you turn your head to face him. "I wanted to say I'm sorry for what happened."

"What?" You were confused by what he just said.

"I said I'm sorry, did you not hear me?" Billy said, He turned his body to face you. "I said I'm sorry." You just stood there silent. Still taking in the fact he is saying sorry. "I'm sorry that I almost punched you into a locker. I realized I was acting like someone I didn't want to be, and you calling me on my shit. It made me look at you differently. I noticed more about you. How you always make sure the other cheerleaders are okay, how you genuinely care about the people you have around you, and you don't take any shit. And- shit I'm bad at this." He's now embarrassed by everything he just said. Heat rises to his cheeks and ears.

You step toward him, placing your hand on his arm. "I thought you were doing pretty well." You smiled, comforting him in a way. He just looked at you. You never smiled at him directly but now that your smile was intended for him. 'damn' He wants you to smile at him all the time.

"Do you want to go on a date?" He asked straight out. You were shocked by his forwardness, but not entirely surprised.

"You want to go on a date with me?"

"Hell yeah, why wouldn't I?" He made it seem like you were speaking a different language. "Listen one date is all I ask, her if you still think I'm a piece of shit I'll stop everything that I'm doing."

Your smile grew even wider. "I would love to go on a date with you Billy."

"Dang, back on first name basis already? Looks like I'm getting a second date already." He joked to you, in turn caused you to laugh.

For the remainder of your time you and Billy talked till you had been picked up. You both talked about anything and everything. It was pure bliss, you loved every second of it. You both were abruptly interrupted by the honking of your brothers car.mYou said your goodbyes to make your way to the car. The smile that held your face did not drop. I didn't drop on Billy's either, when getting home Max found it incredibly disturbing to see her step brother so giddy.

That following night Billy arrived to your house to take you on your promised date. Which one date turned into another and another and another. Till it reached throughout the whole school that Billy Hargrove and the cheer captain were finally official. With many guys questioning Billy as to why he picked you out of everyone, to which he said if they insulted you again he had no problem with dealing with them himself. Girls just snuffed their noses up to you since you now made Billy officially off the market. Not like you cared, he's your boyfriend now and you have him all to yourself. So you could say everything did work out in the end. You and Billy have each other.

"So I guess we have Tommy to thank since he is the reason we met?" You joked.

"Hell no, I would have went after you even if you didn't hit me with that basket ball." He smirk.

"Jeez, you are something Billy." You smiled, leaning into him to seal your lips in a kiss. Yeah, nothing could beat this.

..........................................................................

Maybe billy hargrove x sunshine!cheerleader!reader ? where they‘re dating and the rest of the cheer squad (except chrissy <3) is jealous so they act like they are her friends and they keep asking her questions about billy to have a chance with him, but she doesn’t realize because she thinks they’re just interested in her relationship since they’re ‘re apparently her friends. But billy is super loyal (kinda unrealistic with his character but anyway lol) and every time they they try to hit on him he rejects them pretty harshly ? And maybe in the end she finally stands up for herself and billy is just like „that‘s my girl.“

I‘m so sorry if this was hard to understand it‘s my first time requesting and I was so nervous🥲, especially since I basically read all of your ST fics😭

Love love love a good boyfriend Billy fic 🫶🏻

I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting <3

Cheerleader game

When the word got out that Billy Hargrove locked down on one girl, hell broke loose. The boys were excited that there wouldn't be any more competition, but the girls were having a hard time accepting it. Billy was the heartthrob of the school and every girl wanted their turn with him. But his eyes landed on Y/N, and they never left.

Y/N was sweet, bubbly, and all-around a ball of sunshine. Her being with Billy was a shock to everyone. Sure, she was a cheerleader and Billy only focused on the popular crowd. But the squad couldn't believe out of all of them, he picked her.

Their jealousy made them bitter and snakes. They swarmed Y/N countlessly with questions about Billy. They craved every detail they could get, details to make him interested in them. Poor Y/N didn't know their intentions, she thought they were just interested in her new relationship. She thought they were being friends.

~~~

"So Y/N, tell us! What does he like about you?" Bethany smiled, patting her manicured nails against the table.

"Um, I don't know. I feel like you'd have to ask him that." Y/N laughed awkwardly. To be honest, she wondered why he liked her too. But she didn't think too long about it. He liked her and asked her out. That's what mattered.

"Wrap your brain around it! You beat out the whole school, there must be something special about you." Bethany said, her eyes glared for a tiny second then a bright smile took over her face.

Y/N tried to rank her brain for compliments Billy gave. She smiled as a few came to mind.

"Oh, I know! He loves my pink lip gloss. He said he loves how shiny and irresistible it makes my lips!"

~~~

Billy was walking towards his car when he saw a girl leaning on it. He eyed her quickly but didn't recognize much about her.

"Can I help you?" Billy asked, and not politely. His voice was thick and sharp. His eyes raised in a bothered way and his body language read annoyed.

Bethany giggled and popped her gum. The gum brought attention to her shiny pink lips. Billy noticed the familiarity of the gloss but didn't say anything about it.

"See something you like? The gloss maybe?" She teased, she slowly applied the lipgloss over her already-coated lips. Billy saw the bottle and confirmed it was the same kind Y/N wore.

"Not on you," Billy said, chuckling at the shocked look on Bethany's face. He got in the car and started the engine. The loud rumble made Bethany move out of the car with a growl.

~~~

"What do you guys enjoy doing on dates? Does he like to go to the movies or something?" Sarah asked, throwing her bright blonde hair over her shoulder.

"We go to the movies a lot! He's really into action movies. He wants to go see that new Batman movie."

~~~

Billy was finishing practice, his sweat dripping from his curls down his chest. The small shorts he wore caught every cheerleader's attention. Practicing in the same gym was the best thing the school came up with.

While Y/N and Chrissy were having a small talk on the couch, Sarah took the opportunity to race off to talk to Billy. After her talk with Y/N yesterday, she raced to the movie theater to buy two tickets for the new Batman film for opening night.

She snatched the tickets and confidently walked up to Billy. His back to her as he switched out his shirts. Sarah felt drool on her chin as she watched his tan back move. She tapped on his shoulder, a smile on her face as he turned.

"Hi, Billy! You looked great during practice today." She batted her eyelashes and trailed her hand up his arm. She tried not to pout when he pushed her hand off and made a grunt sound in response.

"Anyway!" She brushed it off, "I got two tickets for that new Batman movie, would you maybe want to go?"

"Sweet! Thanks!" He smiled. There was a glint in his eye that made her stomach flip. "Can I see them?" He asked, his hand reaching out. She tried to catch her breath as his fingertips touched her skin. Her body was on fire from the simple touch.

"Opening night! That kicks ass. Thanks." He said he slipped the tickets into his pocket. "See ya."

Sarah was confused as she watched him walk off. She turned around and growled when she saw him walk up to Y/N. The tickets were in his hands as he showed them to Y/N, who excitedly nodded. They walked out hand in hand with Sarah's tickets.

~~~

Y/N screamed as Billy scored the winning shot. The gymnasium was electric as the boys celebrated their win. Y/N waited for all the boys to finish congratulating Billy, waiting for her turn to race in his arms and kiss his face.

By the time the boys finished, the cheer squad raced to Billy next. Y/N stood shocked as all these girls swarmed her boyfriend. Their hands on his skin, and lips on his cheek. That's supposed to be her!

"Get your man, girl." Chrissy encouraged, her arms crossed as she looked in shame at her team.

Y/N huffed and marched over to her boyfriend. She felt a sense of pride that he didn't look pleased either. He looked annoyed with all these girls.

Once his blue eyes caught hers, a smile lit up his whole face. Y/N wanted to laugh at the way he pushed through the girls, his feet walking towards her.

"There's my girl." He cheered, his arms open as she raced into them. She ignored everyone around them as Billy spun her in the air. Her praise was the only one he cared about hearing it from.

"Amazing, baby." Her words pressed against his lips as she kissed him. And she kissed him hard. Her hands were in his hair as he set her back on the floor. Her back arched as he dipped her.

When they separated from their hot kiss, Y/N offered him a smile before she looked to her team. Her face was hard as the smile was swiped off her face. A glare and snarl sent their way as she stepped closer to them.

"I'm done with all you girls flirting and touching him. He's taken and he's not interested. If you continue to disrespect my relationship, your ass is off the team." The girls quickly ran off, A sense of fear filled the atmosphere as they refused to look at her or Billy.

Y/N stood proudly as she watched them scatter.

"Atta girl." Billy praised, his arms wrapping around her from behind. His face snuggled in her neck as she giggled at the feeling.

"Gotta sink my claws in you a tad bit more, I think," Y/N said, quietly moaning as Billy nipped at her neck.

"Gladly let you."

Hi, I just want to say that I adore your writing. I want to ask if you could write a Billy x reader fic, where reader is part of hellfire and Billy develops a crush on the reader to the point where Max is irritated by how lovesick he is. Max tells him to ask her out as it’s obvious that he likes her but Billy makes up an excuse which causes Max to roll her eyes and tell him to grow up. Billy asks the reader out and it turns out that she likes him too and it turns out that they have a lot in common (for example their shared love of metalica). On the Monday following the date during lunch Jason starts picking the hellfire table and calls them all freaks, Billy gets protective over the reader and punches him telling him to stay the hell away from his girl. This probably isn’t the best idea but if you do choose to write it, I can’t wait to read it

I hope this is what you were hoping for and you enjoy it! Thank you for requesting and your kind words<3

Not freaks

When Max first wanted to join Hellfire, Billy laughed his ass off. She rolled her eyes and scoffed. She didn't want to tell him or deal with him making fun of her, but she needed to be picked up. She'd seen Eddie drive, and she didn't want any part of that. He made Billy look like a safe driver.

Billy didn't agree, but he didn't have a choice. He knew Neil would lose his head if something happened to Max. He was smacking his steering wheel as he jammed out to Metallica. His speakers were loud and he was smoking his cigarette.

"Bye Max! See you tomorrow, tell your ride a great song" Billy threw out his cigarette, unlocking his door as he looked toward the passenger side. Max slid in as she waved off to a girl. A girl Billy never noticed before. He slightly leaned towards Max to see her but Max shoved him.

"Space! Jeez," Billy rolled his eyes at her comment and watched as the girl walked to her car. Even from the back of her head, she had Billy's attention, in more ways than one.

~~~

Billy couldn't recognize the girl and it was driving him insane, but he'd never ask Max. He didn't need her knowing his business or ruining his chance. He paid more attention in the hallways and his classes, searching around to see if he could spot her. But he never did.

"Hellfire ends at eight, so don't be late!" Max demanded, throwing on her backpack. Billy rolled his eyes and went to make a smart remark when that same girl walked up.

"Hey, Max! Are you ready for tonight? I sense Eddie is preparing to destroy all of us." Billy felt himself smiling as the girl giggled. His blue eyes checked her out, taking in her jeans and black sweater. Her black boots gave her a few inches as she ruffled Max's hair.

"Not like he can. We have the control." Max scoffed, she refused to ever seem weak around boys.

Billy coughed as loud as he could, knocking his knuckles on the car hood. Max rolled her eyes and turned around.

"Yes?" She hissed

Billy tried to signal what he wanted, nodding his head towards the girl. Max glared as she turned back.

"This is my asshole brother, Billy," Max announced with a bored tone. Crossing her arms as she smirked back at Billy.

"Y/N." She said, smiling politely as she nodded to him. Billy smirked and nodded back.

"You're the guy with the good music taste." She said, remembering the song that blasted way too loud through his speakers.

"And you're the pretty girl that recognized good taste." Billy smacked on his charming smile, loving how she smiled to the ground at the compliment.

"Gag," Max said, grabbing Y/N's hand and dragging her into the building.

~~~

"Tell me about Y/N" Billy demanded as he took the spot next to Max at the kitchen table. She looked up from her textbook with an annoyed sigh.

"Senior, hot, edgy, sadly your type, and even worse you are hers," Max said, shivering in fake disgust.

"But she's a hellfire freak?" Billy asked. "She doesn't seem to be freakish."

Max rolled her eyes, as usual. "Hellfire doesn't make you a freak, asshole. She's creative and is a damn good player. If anyone took the time to understand how DnD works, you'd realize it's not a freak show. Plus she'd kick your ass if you ever called her or any of us that."

"Is she single?" Billy asked, Max swore he almost looked nervous.

"If she had a boyfriend I would have said that, dingus." Max hissed, slamming her book shut. "I'd like to study in peace."

~~~

Billy had a sense of pride hearing Max say that he was Y/N's type. He honestly never cared to chase a girl, but he kept wondering about her.

During lunch he looked toward the freak hellfire table, seeing her smile. Billy couldn't help but stare, she was a magnet. She was single, but was she into any of them? Billy's eyes set on Eddie, a guy who had long hair like Billy did. A guy who wore leather like Billy did. Listened to cool bands like Billy did. If Billy was her type, would Eddie be too? He watched as she giggled and smacked Eddie's arm. His arm was thrown over her shoulder as he snacked on her fries. Billy took a mental note to ask Max about it.

~~~

"Dudeeeeee, you've asked about her every single day for the past week. Just ask the damn girl out." Max huffed, another night of Billy asking questions. She hated that he was a player and she had to deal with endless girls in her house. But somehow lovesick Billy was even worse.

"Her and I have barely had an interaction. She's not going to say yes to a stranger, Max!" He argued.

"You're not a stranger. I introduced you."

"In a horrible way might I add." Billy said as he glared down at her.

"Oh, whatever. I'm sure she's heard all about you around the halls." Max said, flipping through the TV. Her words made Billy a tad nervous. What if she was turned off by him because of his asshole and fuck boy act. Max looked over at him as he got silent. Her eyes looked over him. He almost looked nervous again.

"Look, you got a reputation and she might not be into that. But if you do like her and are serious about dating not just fucking. I think she'd hear you out." Max said softly, she stood up and patted his back as a sort of comfort. He smiled at the gesture and her words.

"What's her number?"

~~~

Max stood in Billy's door frame laughing as he raced around his room to find out what to wear. He tore apart his closet and dresser.

"Dude, it's a date. Grab jeans and a shirt that isn't unbuttoned all the way." Max advised.

Billy grabbed a classic T-shirt and his favorite jeans, pushing Max out of his room as he closed the door. He got dressed and covered himself in cologne. He hated that he was nervous.

~~~

"Billy I suck at this!" She groaned as she tossed the tiny ball. Billy laughed next to her, winning her skeeball challenge.

"Then why did you make it a competition?"

"Because I'm usually good at everything!" She huffed. Billy smiled at her pout and came behind her.

"Here, let me help." He tried not to melt when he smelled her sweet perfume. His hand covered hers as he swung her arm back.

"Follow this motion, then let the ball go." He instructed, he moved her arm back and forward. Her hand released the ball and went up the ramp. The ball finally made it in.

"YES!" She cheered, turning around as she hugged Billy. Her excitement was contagious as he spun her around.

Once she landed back on her feet, she realized how close their faces were. Her breath caught in her throat as he leaned down. His soft lips pressed against hers.

~~~

Billy was still buzzing from the date. A smile on his face as he walked into school. Even Max could notice how happy he was.

He was reading through a car magazine in the cafeteria. Ignoring the commotion around him. Until he heard her voice.

He snapped his head up to see Jason at their table, running his mouth about the freaks and other names in the book. Billy took a deep breath and stood up. He walked over to the table as Y/N stood up and got in Jason's face.

"What are you gonna do, freak bitch?" Before Y/N could even speak, Billy grabbed Jason's shoulder and turned him around. His right fist connected with Jason's jaw, sending him straight to the floor.

"BILLY!" she gasped, grabbing his arm and moving him away. Teachers rushed to check on Jason.

"Talk about my girl or hellfire again, and I'll make sure you can never get back up." Billy hissed.

The hellfire table sat shocked that Billy Hargrove stood up for them. Y/N smiled at her boyfriend and Eddie gave him an approved nod.

Max smiled as she finally saw Billy in a new light, a happy Billy.

What Goes Around, Comes Around

prompt: ( requested ) Billy's known for his temper and being obsessed with his pretty little girlfriend - which gets her severely injured by his past transgressions.

pairing: Billy Hargrove x female!cheerleader!reader reader and Billy are both 18+, seniors in high school

word count: 6.7k+

fandom masterlist: Stranger Things

note: you're a liar if you didn't immediately start singing Justin Timberlake's "What Goes Around... Comes Around".

warnings: remember there are different responses to trauma! some people shut down, stop talking; others jabber and chatter nervously. reader is the latter. we got angst, we got literal hurt and comfort, established relationship. term "going postal" is used, cursing, technically underage drinking, not edited, author mildly gave up at the end. triggering content: depictions of physical violence, depictions of injury and blood, depiction of abuse, violent plots, Billy's girl gets physically assaulted (but it's minimally detailed).

DO NOT read if this content can potentially trigger you. you are NOT missing anything, you will miss NOTHING by skipping this, but i do try to keep the details as neutral as possible. again, prioritize yourself, mental health, and emotional state - this ain't worth the read if it's gonna upset you, i promise. author loves you all

"That's fucking her, I swear to God."

"You sure?"

"100%. That's Billy's little bitch he's obsessed with."

The three guys smirked at one another, eyeing you across the living room as you giggled and drank with a few friends in adorable, fashion forward outfits. Someone started a game of beer pong, you on the sidelines to cheer, giving them a full-show of your form.

"She's hot," Jake mused. "I can see why he keeps her so close."

"Nah, not tonight," Lawrence frowned, "heard they got in some huge fight at school. Like, she walked home and he sped off in his car."

"Hm, heard he's ridiculously protective of her... She must've really pissed him off," the third boy, Steven, nodded. "So, he's not here tonight?"

"Doubt it," Jake nodded.

"Go find out," Steven advised. "There, the basketball bros - one of them would know. Or a cheerleader," he eyed the crowd. "Chrissy's over there, Brittany's beside her - they'd be the best bet in my mind."

"We seriously considering this?" Lawrence asked with a small, nervous chuckle. "I mean, it's kinda crazy, isn't it? We're gonna send Billy Hargrove a message by roughing up his girl? There's not some better way?"

"I'd love to hear it," Steven scoffed. "Billy's too comfortable at the top of the school, broke my fucking nose and deviated Jake's septum. Didn't he fuck your sister the first week he was here, Lawrence?"

"I mean - "

"Broke her fucking heart, didn't he?" Jake tacked on.

"Well, yeah," Lawrence sighed, shrugging.

"You tell me, dude, was that shit fair?"

"No," Lawrence looked down.

"So, yeah, I know, it's bad to hit a lady - but what about my boot? Huh?" Steven smirked, nodding. "Go find out what you can. Last thing we need is Billy walkin' in the party, right?"

Jake nodded with enthusiasm, leaving Lawrence behind. He hesistated but then did as Steven asked; asking the present basketball team members if Billy gave indication he was coming. The cheerleaders assured he wouldn't dare show up when you were there after a very public fight, and if he did, it would be to cause another scene.

So, after reporting back to Steven, a plan was formed. Lawrence didn't seem fully on board, but in an effort to save his own skin, he went along with what Jake and Steven were plotting - even if that meant roughing up a woman. Something his mama and grandmama vehemently taught him not to do...

Something churned in his stomach when he heard how the two lads were nearly foaming at the mouth to get their revenge. So, he casually went to grab another drink - pausing where a few of your friends were. "Oi," he whispered, earning their attention.

"Hey, Law," Chrissy smiled.

"Hey, Chris," he sniffled, glancing around. "Listen, uh, you seen Billy 'round?"

"No? Why?"

"Hmm, just, uh... Heard his girl was all upset, thought maybe her drinking all that much was a bad idea without him around."

"Oh," Chrissy blinked, looking up at her boyfriend, Jason, as he approached the group with two drinks in hand. "I didn't think about it like that, Law."

"What's wrong?" Jason asked.

"No, nothing, Lawrence just pointed out how shitty it is to drink without someone watching your back," she pouted.

He nodded, "You lose your friends, man?"

"No, just tryna look out," Lawrence shrugged. "Few girls here drinking a lot, not a lot of defenses 'round them."

Jason frowned, "That's kinda their man's job, isn't it?"

"What if their man isn't here?"

"I'm gonna be right back," Chrissy smiled, parting ways with her girlfriend in tow - and when Law looked, they were using the kitchen telephone. He prayed they were phoning the Hargrove residence.

Lawrence sighed in slight relief and nodded to Jason; the white boy just nodding back silently and letting the other athlete pass him by to head back for Jake and Steven. He grabbed an unopened beer on his way to maintain appearances.

"Hey, we got it," Jake smirked at the third boy, "she just went outside, we should move now."

"Huh?" Law mumbled.

"C'mon," Steven growled, pushing off the mantle and stalking for the backdoors to follow your retreating form.

"Wait, what're we doing?" Law asked, trying to keep up with the drunken, elongated strides of the two dickheads he called 'friends'. "Hey! Guys, c'mon - what's going on?"

"Just - shut up, pussy boy, let's go, fuckin' keep up," Steven sneered, shoving the glass door out of his way and nearly cracking it.

Outside, the in-ground pool was alight with multicolored lights. There were teenagers littered all around the pool deck; some lounging and some standing, all drinking. There was a kegstand in play, ping pong table hosting another game of Beer Pong, and the thick stench of cigarette smoke in the air.

"She's over there," Jake pointed, their sights turning to see you leaning over to huff on your cigarette while Tammy May Flipsen lit the end of it. Your smile was genuine as you thanked her, just stepping two feet away to gaze up at the stars - a perfect time to strike.

The alcohol in everyone's system made them slow, vulnerable, and downright stupid; leaving Steven and Jake the opportunity to seize either of your arms and literally rush you around the corner of the house without anyone intervening.

Once in the remote side yard, the sickening plan commenced.

Lawrence could barely approach, managing to watch with tears in his eyes as the noises of the party masked the noises of pain you emitted; two nearly full-grown men took out their anger towards your boyfriend on you. You cried, begged for reprieve, sounded so confused and broken that it shattered Lawrence's heart - briefly thinking what if someone did this to his sister...

That made him spring into action. "Hey! No! No, this ain't right! Get off her!" Lawrence barked, shoving the two away from your body on the ground. "That's enough - back off - fuck is wrong with you!?"

"What the fuck do you think you're doing!?" Steven demanded.

"Bitch has it coming!"

"What? You fuckin' her, too? Got you pussy whipped like Billy Boy?"

"Just fuck off, beating on a girl!" Lawrence snapped, but it was a huge mistake. Jake and Steven shared a single look before launching at the third boy, beating him as they had you - but much harder. He swore he earned a concussion, their heels stomping his neck, collarbones, wrists, ribs, ankles; exactly the same as they did to you.

"Tryna defend her now!?" Jake heaved, giving a swift kick to Lawrence's kidney. "Huh? You're so scared of Billy but you're gonna mess with his girl?" He laughed. "She must have a magic cunt or something!"

"You're so fucking pathetic, you have to beat up a girl!?" Law shot right back, earning a swift kick to the jaw from the lad that used to play soccer (or American fútbol). "Huh? Two on one? Such big men, aren't yah?" He sneered again, spitting blood to the side.

"Leave it," Steven halted Jake when he charged again, "they're both pretty fucked."

"Well, that dumbass should learn a lesson 'bout interfering!"

"Law's learned - he has, bro, and if he wants, he can learn again," Steven spat on Lawrence's form, Jake doing the same to you - both eventually stalking away like bored toddlers walking away from broken toys.

Slowly, Lawrence grunted as he pulled himself up to sit against the side of the house. "Fuck's sake," he whispered, wiping his eyes and wincing when he felt the sore skin - trailing a finger up, wincing again when he discovered split skin above his eyebrow. "Ohhhh, fuuuuck," Law drawled when you slowly peaked up from your fetal position on the ground. "Hey, hey, you all right? Stupid question," he hissed in pain when he moved to try and assist you.

You cried out when his grip laid on you, but powered through to let him help you sit against the house, too. "Holy shit," you whispered, blood dribbling from your mouth; teeth feeling loose, a headache already assaulting you, and cuts stinging in the bitter night.

"I'm so sorry."

"N-No, you - it would've been so much worse if you hadn't..." You trailed off, sniffling, "You didn't have t'jump in, you got hurt 'cause of me."

"You got hurt 'cause of Billy," Lawrence frowned.

"Huh?"

"That's why they're so pissed off," Lawrence explained, spitting more blood to the side; his jeans stained with mud, blood, and grass. "Billy got their asses few weeks ago, they're still pissed... I heard them," he deflected smoothly, "talkin' about teaching Billy a lesson through you. Didn't feel right, but I should've stopped them so much sooner. I-I'm sorry I didn't do more, Y/N."

"You did more than anyone else," you whimpered, drawing your knees into your chest to lock your arms around them. "I don't even know them, they go to our school?"

"We're all in AP History with Snyder."

You paused to nod absently, not even bothering to try and recall any interactions you might've had with Steven and Jake. Instead, you eyed your savior, mumbling, "You're Lawrence, right?"

"Yeah," he breathed.

"Your sister's... Cara? Sarah? No, no," you paused to think, his frown deepening as you seemed so nice and authentic. "Your sister's name is Natalie, right?"

"Yeah," he half-smiled. "You know her?"

"She's a sweetheart, has those cute glasses? Yeah, I like her; she just joined cheer, right?"

"Yeah, that's her."

You eyed him for a moment, ignoring the blood dripping off you both from the beat down; then whispered with a sniffle, "Is that why you helped? 'Cause your sister's on the cheer squad, too?"

"No," he replied instantly, sounding quiet (like you), "I'd like to believe if I saw something I know is wrong... I'd be the type of person to step in, try to stop it."

"You did tonight."

"I should've done more a lot sooner."

"You could've been really hurt, Law."

"Like you?"

"I'm just - look, two guys? Beatin' on me? Yeah," you scoffed, wiping blood from your split lip, "like I ever stood a chance. But you didn't have t'do all that, they wanted Billy, found me instead. You could've walked away, but instead, you jumped in, and you could've been really hurt. That wouldn't help anyone."

"I'm still sorry..."

You sniffled, but before you could respond, you heard footsteps thundering over the lawn; a voice shouting your name in frantic, panicked little outbursts. Looking up, you caught sight of a black leather jacket and unruly blonde curls, frowning deeper. "Oh, fuck," you whispered, withdrawing into yourself, "oh, no, no, not now. Not now, Goddamnit. Think I can make a run for it to the street before he sees me?" You asked Law quietly, nearly hissing your whisper.

"Ain't that Billy?" Law asked, finger pointed.

"He can't see me," you rushed in a panic, eyes wide and tears welling. "Lawrence, he can't!"

"Why?"

"He'll go on a fucking rampage, Lawrence! Ever heard going postal? Yeah, Bee gives that shit new meaning."

"They'd deserve whatever Billy wants t'do," Law frowned, tensing up when Billy had turned, caught sight of you two, and made an angry beeline for you in the grass. "U-Uh, Billy's approaching," he warned you as your boyfriend arrived, trying to pull back to give privacy, but wincing in pain that made him stop.

"The fuck is going - ? Oh, my fuckin' God," Billy trailed off, then whispered when he saw you huddled on the ground; your dress in tatters. Your head was bowed, knees drawn in, refusing to meet his eyes; making your leather-clad boyfriend lower himself to a knee. "Baby? Hey, look at me, sweet girl, lemme see... C'mon, baby, please, look at me."

You only sniffled.

"It was Jake and Steven," Lawrence told Billy, trying to find his feet; falling over and just giving up.

"Hell happened to you, man?"

Lawrence frowned, looking nervous, but your voice answered, "He saved me, Bee. Jumped in, took some of the beating."

Billy looked between you and Lawrence, but focused on you - seeing the injuries to your face and chest in full light. "Oh, my God," he breathed, looking you over in shock. Those pink, pillowy lips you adored licking and sucking on were parted in shock.

You half-smiled, "Think you pissed a few of the wrong guys off."

"Jesus Christ, sweet girl. What happened? Tell me, please, before I start making assumptions," he demanded, reaching for your cheek - making you recoil hard enough that your head banged on the house supporting your exhausted body. "Hey, hey," he whispered, looking physically wounded by your action, "'s just me, baby, it's just me, it's Bee, I'm not gonna hurt you. C'mon, sweetheart, lemme help you."

You sniffled, letting him reach for you again and caress your cheek so he could direct your head left and right; giving him a full view of your injuries that continued to weep. He stiffened as he took note of a new cut or bruise upon every new sweep of his eyes, his anger skyrocketing with every passing moment.

"It hurts," you whimpered. "Apparently, you beat the shit outta those guys weeks ago - guess they were waiting for an opening to strike back."

"You don't deserve this," he growled angrily. "Fuck - look at you! Goddamnit, I'm so sorry, princess, this is my fault. All my fucking fault, shit," he hissed, looking close to tears, "I put you here, I'm so sorry, baby."

"Got Lawrence his ass beat, too," you pouted.

"Sorry about this, man," Billy instantly offered the other boy, who was practically slumped over in the grass. He still managed to give a thumbs up. "But, uh, thank you for stepping in. You know, not a whole lotta people would."

"Nah, it was the right thing to do," Law frowned, waving him off.

"You said Jake and Steven did this?"

"Mhm," Law nodded. "Jake Chastain and Steven Barton."

"Yeah, I know 'em," Billy shook his head, "and I'll fuckin' kill 'em - "

"Can we get cleaned up first? Before we go murdering high school jocks?" You pouted in pain.

"Hey, man. You got a friend here or something? Someone to help us?" Billy asked Lawrence, still caressing your face with his thumb sweeping the apple of your cheek.

"My sister's 'round, yeah..."

"Want me to grab her?" Billy offered awkwardly.

"I'd actually appreciate it," Law whispered. "Gotta get home, yeah?"

"Yeah, man. Stay here, I'll grab her," Billy agreed. "What's her name?"

"Natalie, she's a cheerleader. Um... Y-You dated her beginning of the year?"

"I remember," he sighed, standing to his feet. He told you earnestly, almost sweetly, "I'll be fast."

But the thing is, you knew Billy all too well by now. "Wait, no," you gasped, trying to stand, "Bee, don't!" It was too late, he was already gone by the time you and Lawrence stumbled out from hiding; just in time to watch Billy point Natalie towards where you and her brother were. Then, he turned and surged up to an unsuspecting Jake and Steven; launching an all-out brawl against the two.

Neither of them stood a chance when Billy was THIS angry. Nobody did. In fact, if Jason, Tommy H., and two other guys hadn't pulled him back, surely, there'd be a lot more than a couple of broken bones. However, when Billy told the other basketball players in a spit-flying rage that these two cowards had attacked his girlfriend (a few turning back to get a look at you), it launched a new, mutual anger. Chrissy and a few other cheerleaders wanted to step in when the "fight" (more like attack) started again, but when they saw you, Lawrence, and Natalie, nobody said a single word. Nobody interfered. Nobody interrupted, and luckily, nobody else joined in...

Before Jake and Steven could lose their lives or sustain serious injury that would result in any arrests, Billy was pulled back by Lawrence - of all people. "Hey, hey," the beaten boy barked, "hey, man, chill - chill! These guys deserve it, yeah, I fucking know, but look, hey!" He grabbed Billy's shoulders to prevent him from turning back for the fray. "Hey! Your girl needs you, man. She needs you more than these bozos. C'mon, you can't go to jail over this shit, right? Right? How mad you gonna be if you get bagged 'cause of these jackasses?"

This seemed to force Billy back to reality and out of his homicidal rage. A few dudes who played football stepped in to hoist the unconscious jocks over their shoulders just to leave them on the curb a couple houses down the street.

Billy raced back to you.

Chrissy and Natalie were helping wipe blood from your skin and hair; clothes damaged, ripped, stained, beyond repair, and another cheerleader was holding a bag of frozen peas to your head as you leaned on her stomach. He slid his jacket from his shoulders, easing you off the girl's belly to leave it around your trembling form and then taking the girl's spot, supporting your body as you were tended to.

Eventually, Chrissy sighed, "I think that's the best we're gonna get you, honey. You want us to come over in the mornings? Help you get dressed and do your make-up?"

"No offense, but I don't think that's necessary... It's not like what happened is a secret," Natalie whispered, looking you over.

"Make-up might irritate the injuries," the other girl offered softly. "But it might cover some of those bruises, I just would avoid the cuts."

"I'm okay, girls, but thank you," you assured softly. "Bee's here t'help."

"Yeah, taking you straight to the hospital," he decided stiffly from behind you.

"What?"

"Think I'm not gonna get you checked out after this? Two men attacked you, I gotta make sure ain't shit's seriously wrong, baby. Don't fight me on this, please."

Billy's mind was warped with memories of sitting in ER's and other clinics with his mother nursing a broken wrist or damaged eye socket. His father's anger had always been a temperamental switch, something Billy felt he always had to outdo. Being in the hospital with you felt too similar, another bolt of rage zinging through his blood; hating the idea that you were the victim, and like his mother, he wasn't able to protect you.

Unlike his mother, this situation was directly his fault. He didn't even remember why he beat the shit outta Steven and Jake all those weeks ago, but whatever the reason, it cost him now. Cost you both.

The party continued inside the house, but Billy walked around the side yard, down to the front, then towards the street full of parked cars with you secure in his arms. After getting you settled safely in the passenger seat of his Camaro, Billy rightened and shut the door; seeing Lawrence and Natalie approaching their own car, the bag of peas now held to his jaw and cheek.

His sister was under his arm, helping him hobble. Billy gulped, realizing Lawrence was beat to hell, too, and if he hadn't jumped in, Lord only knew what state you'd be in now. When the two men caught one another's eye, Billy offered a nod of respect and thanks; the other lad returning it as if to say he was welcome. Billy raced for the driver's door, sliding in, and without turning any music on, drove off towards the hospital.

You were grumpy to be there, but one look at you had the medical staff moving at a quickened pace to help you; offering speedy aid. You were cleaned and cared for; questions regarding the level of assault making you nervous, but you answered honestly that two classmates had jumped you at a party. This meant the police were called; tears in your eyes and down your cheeks when you had to tell Chief Hopper (a close family friend) exactly what happened.

Billy provided their assailant’s full names and promised they wouldn't be in the best shape when (slash if) the two were found.

After hearing your story and writing the names down from Billy, Hopper sighed in empathy, "Kid... Don't admit t'anything."

"I'm not, I'm just making a casual note," Billy countered. "You know, people don't take too kindly to people hittin' a woman. Less so when she's drunk, alone, and they fuckin' stomp on her - "

"All right," Hopper tried to halt his built up anger. "Let's just take a breath here - "

"Uh, Chief?" His deputy interrupted. "Them boys? Uh, a... Jake Chastain and Steven Barton? They were just wheeled in from an ambulance."

"Interesting," Hopper noted, sparing Billy a small look. "From where?"

"A neighbor called them in, said there's a party few houses from her on Hawthorne."

Jim Hopper sighed and turned to you and Billy with his hands on his hips. His face was passively angry. "Sound familiar?" He asked, tongue sweeping over his teeth.

"Yes," you answered for you both, "that's where it happened, Chief."

His eyes softened when he looked back at you. "All right," he nodded, looking to his partner. "Go stand by their room, keep an eye - I'll be there in a second, but the victims made a positive ID. Doc's will treat 'em and we'll book 'em." When left alone, Hopper took a suspicious look around the hospital floor before sliding the curtains shut around your bed; moving to your other side, removing his hat, and kneeling. "Listen, kid," he whispered, taking your hand softly, "I got a daughter at home, too, and if anyone - and I mean, anyone - laid a hand on her the way you were tonight, I'd burn this town to the fucking ground."

Billy snorted in amusement, "Know the feeling."

Hopper nodded, "So believe me when I say, I need to know, off the record, what really happened tonight. Your father will need to know that I am doing everything to help - but I need to know the truth."

"I don't know what to tell you, Hopper," you frowned, matching his quiet tone, "I've told you what I know. I was a few drinks in, stepped outside t'smoke, and that's when they grabbed me, took me t'the side yard, and started wailing on me. I dropped, they kept goin', that's when this other boy stepped in. He got beat up pretty good, too, but he helped get them away. Billy showed up, we came here - "

"I hit them," Billy interrupted, making you squeak lightly. Hopper just laid his other hand over yours so he cocooned it; glancing around the under skirts of the curtains to make sure you remained alone.

Then he asked, "When?"

"After I made sure Y/N was okay," Billy explained, petting a hand over the back of your head; never looking away from Hopper. "I found her friend's sister, made sure someone knew where they were, and then I hit them... And I didn't stop hitting them."

"Kid - "

"Some teammates pulled me off, don't worry - it could've been so much worse. But when the others found out what they did to my girl?" He hissed quietly, "They took matters into their own hands by themselves, sir. My girl was attacked, I couldn't let that just slide, Chief, I hope you understand."

Hopper sighed, "Well, I can't condone the violence, but since it was a group effort, be a helluva lot more paperwork bringing you in versus those two who started it."

Billy nodded absently, your free hand laying over Hopper's to stack. "Did you call my dad?" You asked nervously.

"Not yet," he frowned. "I gotta check on the suspects, but I can after."

"Could you not? For me, please?" You sniffled. "He'll just worry and would get all pissy 'cause his trip has to be cut - "

"He's not home?" Hopper asked in earnest confusion with knitted brows.

Your head shook, "Chicago for the week."

"He left eight days ago," Billy snipped.

"Bee," you reprimanded sharply.

"Hey," Hopper squeezed your hand, "it's okay, you're over 18, I don't have to call him. But El and I are gonna drop by later with dinners and to check on you, her little friend, too, probably. You know, the, uh... The little red head?"

"Max?" You asked.

"Yeah, her. Nice girl."

"She's Billy's step-sister," you snickered, wincing when your broken ribs protested.

"You should rest," Hopper bid, "and thank you for being honest," he stood to his feet while nodding at Billy. "Tell you what, I won't report you starting the fight - technically... It'll be reported as a randomized group effort after they were caught assaulting Y/N."

Billy nodded, too shocked for words as Hopper patted your hand, placed his hat on, and exited the little curtained room. "Wow," your boyfriend breathed. "Since when are you friends with the Chief of Police?"

"He and my dad go way back," you eased.

"All cops like him?"

"Fuck no, you know that." After a beat, you reached for his hand to lace your fingers with him, "Hey," you bid, "I-I'm really sorry."

"Baby, just - don't even start - "

"No, for earlier, for our fight," you interrupted, "and for feeling petty enough to go to the party alone when I know you don't like that... For drinking, not being more aware like you taught me. I didn't use the buddy-system when I went t'smoke, it was a major fuck-up, I know, but I'm just sorry. I feel like I've disappointed you or something - "

"No, hey, sweet girl," he rushed, sitting on the edge of the gurney to stare at you directly, "don't you ever feel that way - you didn't do nothing wrong. Hear me? You didn't put yourself in this position, you didn't deserve what happened, you didn't - no, just," he sighed deeply, "you didn't do any of this, sweetheart. Okay? If anything... If anything, this is my fucking fault and I'm the one who is so sorry."

Your head shook, but Billy continued,

"They did this to you because of me." Tears filled those sweet baby blues. "Because I don't have a hold of my temper - I fucked them up, so, they fucked you up. This is my fault, I'm so sorry. But look, hey, I'll fix this, okay? I swear to God - I'm gonna fix this."

"The cops got 'em, we don't have t'do anything else," you mumbled. "You don't have to do anything else, Billy."

"Maybe not, but I can't let this go - look at you," a single tear dripped. "Fucking look at you, my sweet girl. In the fucking hospital 'cause of me - I can't - this ain't right. I gotta make it right."

You couldn't answer because a technician was arriving to take you for a CT, MRI, and X-Ray - all of those scans that would tell them what was going on internally. Hopper was seen outside the two boy's rooms - Billy following your bed closely as you where wheeled away. Every scan or test he could remain close for, he was; stepping back when needed, but being sucked right back to your side when able.

By the end of the night, you were released into Billy's care because all patients with head injuries had to have some kind of chaperone, and a few floors up, Steven and Jake were being handcuffed to their hospital beds by Hopper.

"Real lucky I wasn't there when you hit her," Jim Hopper seethed quietly, tightening the cuff on Jake to an uncomfortable grip. "Your parents would need money for your funerals - not bail," he offered one single more glare before leaving the next shift of deputies on duty. He sped all the way home and held Eleven in a suffocating hug.

Turns out, you sustained decent injuries from that night.

A (cleanly) broken ankle. Six different broken ribs. Split lip that required two stitches. Stitched earlobes from where piercings were ripped out. Severely bruised collarbones, bordering on broken. One blackened eye. Along with other generic bruises and cuts, more seemingly discovered as the days drug by slowly.

Billy was ready to mow down anyone in his way at any point, but his only ability to get through the school day was that he saw you everyday afterward. He dropped whatever sport and / or club that held his interest, collecting coursework you missed, then driving Max and "Jane" Hopper to your place. He would've lashed out if this was any other situation, but because you asked him to behave and bring you the materials you needed, he did. He played nice.

The two assailants, Steven and Jake, had been arrested by Jim Hopper. They apparently had a rough ride to the station, but that wasn't here or there. What they did to you was far worse that nobody batted a single lash when the two were brought in the station for booking, looking freshly beat up and bloodied. A judge also rejected their bail.

Billy brought you whatever work you missed during your recovery at home, most teachers shocked to see him so diligent in showing up and making the collections. He didn't understand whatever the teachers told him about the work, but you did - and it was fascinating to him, watching you work or study. He usually sat by your window to smoke, but on the occasion, you asked for a toke and wouldn't care about where the smoke blew. So, as weeks passed, he stopped specifically going over to your window; just leaving it open for ventilation so he could remain at your side.

Anything you needed, he got. He did. He gave you. Guilt was one helluva motivator and Billy was chalked-full; so, he did the only thing he knew he could, being acts of service.

You were laid up, it made sense. He could bring you into the shower, get naked himself and help you bathe. He could carry you downstairs, cook for you, help out around the house by keeping it clean because he knew it stressed you out. He would collect the mail, water plants, do dishes, just turned into a househusband that made your stomach and cheeks feel all warm and fuzzy. Never did you think Billy had the ability to be domestic, but here he was, in your great-grandmother's kitchen, wearing a stained apron while trying to bake cookies while you worked on a physics project.

"Hey, Bee?"

"What's wrong?" He asked instantly, setting the hot tray to the stove.

"No, hey, calm down," you smiled with a small laugh. "I was just wondering... You know, like... What's gotten into you?"

"Huh?"

"You know what I mean," you huffed, setting your pencil down. "You literally haven't let me out of your sight except when you're at school."

He shrugged, "You need help."

"You don't ask if I do."

"I don't need to ask when I can just see it."

"Billy."

He sighed and begrudgingly scraped cookies off the hot tray to rest on the cooling sheets. "Your dad asked me to stay close," he offered.

"Bullshit."

"No, really," Billy insisted. "He's in and out with work, so, he asked me to stick around, just in case."

"Okay, fine, but it's more than that. Billy, tell me the truth, baby, please. It's not a bad thing, I'm just curious what's really going on."

"I'm just... I'm just nervous, you know?"

Your head cocked, "Why's that?"

"Look what happened to you," he chuckled ruefully. "All fucked up, can't even go t'school until your ribs are healed - all 'cause of me. 'Cause I fucked up and went too far - "

"William," you snapped, making his wide, shocked eyes meet yours. "I'm not gonna listen to this anymore. Okay? I know you're sorry, you tell me everyday, andI know you're feeling guilty, but this isn't your fault, you're not the one who put hands on me - "

You flinched when he lobbed the cookie tray into the sink, causing a ruckus, his voice yelling over the noise, "FOR FUCK'S SAKE!"

"William!"

"I'm trying to protect you!" He yelled, tears swelling when he whipped around to face you. "I-I don't know what else to do! Look, okay, say what you fucking want, but the truth is, those two assholes came at you 'cause of me. Okay? 'Cause I had to be myself and beat the shit outta them 3 months ago, they never forgave - they didn't forget. I put you in this situation, that now? Now, yeah!" He laughed without humor. "Yeah! I'm fucking nervous leaving you alone! Fuck knows what could happen to you, and who's to say there aren't more people out there just waiting for this kinda opportunity! Baby!" He rushed for you at the kitchen table, your mouth sewn shut in shock as he found his knees in front of you and took both your hands in his. "Baby, listen to me. You're the only thing - no, I'm serious!" He insisted when you looked ready to protest this sentiment you've heard before. "You're the only thing I fucking care about, that I want to protect, and they all know it - I don't exactly hide it. I love you so fucking much, they'd do this again - they'd fucking hurt you to get to me and that idea just..." He sighed, looking lost.

You pulled a hand free to instantly caress his cheek, turning his attention upward until his eyes met yours. "Billy," you whispered, "baby, nobody's after us. This was just a freak accident, this was a fluke, okay? You're worried anyone else is gonna come at me, at us, but I know nobody else is that fucking stupid. They wouldn't test you, and Jake and Steven took advantage of an already bad situation. Okay? We had a fight - which was pretty public. So, people knew we were at odds, and when I showed up at that party alone, started drinking, it was their perfect opportunity to strike."

"You can't say that, we don't know if anyone else is gonna test us," he sniffled. "I've made a lot of mistakes... Pissed a lot of people off. One of them might've grown a pair."

"Okay," you relented, "then I guess we're gonna have to stick together, you know... So you can keep me safe, right?"

He chuckled dryly, "I'm trying, princess."

"Well, we can work out a better way - one that doesn't run you into the fucking ground, Billy, Jesus," you searched his face. "Are you sleeping? At all?"

"'Course I am - "

"Don't lie to me."

He sighed, deflating a little, "I sleep... Only when I stay here."

"Billy, you stay only a couple nights a week when Daddy's home."

"I know."

"So, you basically only sleep when Daddy's out of town and you stay here?" You squeaked, watching him nod; pouting and feeling your own guilt brew. "Baby... Look, can we just agree that this isn't either of our faults? Right? Yeah? If I'm not allowed to think this was my fault, you aren't either."

"I was the one they wanted t'hurt," he shook his head. "They did this 'cause of me, sweetheart, how can you be so - so - fuck! So fucking understanding a-and forgiving?"

"Because I love you," you answered like it was common knowledge, even giving a small giggle.

"That doesn't... But that doesn't even - "

"What? Mean anything? Bee, it means everything," you smiled at him. "I love you, so, when you make mistakes, I forgive you - even though there's nothing you've done. I mean," you winced slightly, "sure, maybe we could reduce the kids you bully or beat up, you know, limit the enemies we might make. And this is something that can be redeemed, can't it?"

He stared at you from the floor, slowly deflating, "Can it? I've fucked up so much, doll, I don't think I deserve whatever forgiveness you wanna give me."

"You can't keep beating yourself up," you snipped. "Hey? Hear me? Look, it happened - it fucking sucked, but it happened and it's fucking over. We both need one another to help move on, okay? So, I need you back, Bee, I need my man back because we need to get through this together. You don't get to sulk in your guilt, I don't get to stew in my regret, we need to help each other out of this."

Billy sniffled, "How? How do we move on when you've still got stitches in your lip?"

"They'll dissolve in a few days," you shrugged meekly. "We move on together, okay? Maybe you pick up basketball again, try to distract yourself. Billy, we need some normalcy again, right? You know?"

"Doll, being away from you makes me feel like my lungs are gonna pop," he shook his head. "I'm afraid something might happen if I'm not there, it's fucking scary after finding you in your own blood."

"Then I'll be at every practice," you eased. "You can drive me to and from school, then you know where I am - you'll know I'm safe."

Billy stared at you a moment, fully dropping to the floor as his energy finally drained. He ran a hand through his hair, rustling the curls, admitting in a soft voice, "I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to not feel so guilty, how to move forward."

"There's no playbook," you agreed. "Guess it means we gotta figure it out ourselves, but again, we do it together. C'mere," you sighed, lowering yourself to the floor with your booted ankle held out.

"No, don't - "

"Fuck off, I'm not totally unable to do shit," you grunted, adjusting yourself and reaching for him. "Come here, please, I wanna hold you! Been cuddling me this whole time, lemme be the big spoon, please."

"Just told me to fuck off, sweetheart, kinda sending some mixed signals, aren't'cha?" He chuckled, turning so his back was to your chest; leaning so you supported him in his slump. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart," he muttered, holding the arm around his collarbones. "I really - if I knew this was gonna happen, I'd never of fought them."

"I know, and I forgive you," you whispered in his ear. "But we can't keep doing this back and forth, okay? I forgive you, Billy, no more apologies."

He sighed, "Yeah... All right..."

"Steven and Jake are arrested, we won't have t'see them again. Hopper will make sure of that," you smirked against the shell of his ear. "And the doctors said I should be good to return to school next week, but I'm out of cheer and everything."

He groaned, "Just something else I've fucked up for you."

"Oh, please, I love the time off," you teased. "Gives me all the time I need to watch my man on the court, huh?" He half-chuckled at your words. "You know I'm ahead in all my classes now, too? Teaching myself at home is far superior than the teacher's bitching at us for eight hours."

"You're gonna love college, baby," he chuckled, the two of you lulling into a comfortable silence. You held him tightly, nuzzled into his neck; both sitting in your emotions, trying to navigate a way out.

"We good?" You whispered.

"We're good," Billy agreed, just as soft. "No more apologies... Try to have less guilt. But you're gonna let me stay close, right?"

"I want you clinging to me so hard, I can't fucking breathe," you smirked. "And if Daddy really asked you to stick around, then you're welcome to stay here longer, even if he's here... Where I can have you close to me," you whispered, licking the skin under his ear. He stiffened.

"No - you better not," he squirmed when you licked again, adding a little teeth in a scrape.

"Billy," you pouted. "It's been weeks!"

"You're still hurt," he argued, turning on the floor to look at you. "I'm not gonna be responsible for breaking another of your ribs 'cause we were horny."

"I'm doing so much better, though!"

"Tell you what," he smirked. "Next business trip of your dad's, I'll fuck you all weekend - wherever you want, however you want."

"He has one in two weeks."

"Mhm, and you have a check up before he leaves."

You eyed him for a moment, "When did you become responsible?"

"I've always been."

"No, this is new. You're remembering dates and my doctor appointments and my dad's work schedule."

"Maybe I just like taking care of you," he whispered against your lips with a growing smirk. After pecking you lips, he quipped, "So, shut up and let me."

"Yes, sir."

requesting rules and masterlist

Stranger Things masterlist

if you are taking billy hargrove requests can you do a billy x reader, where the reader has had a really bad day because people have been mean or like someones being sexist and then when they get home billy cheers them up.If not that's fine love you u <3

Still A Thing

(Billy Hargrove x Female Reader)

Warnings: Language, suggestive situation, Tommy being a dick

Word Count: 783

A/N: While technically my requests are still closed, I'm really glad you sent this in! I feel like I'm headed into a rut, but this helped get some creative juices flowing, so thank you!

I hope it's okay how I interpreted your request, and I hope you enjoy!

Billy looked away from the TV when the front door slammed, and you stormed right past him.

His brow furrowed. You didn’t get pissed often, but when you did, it was usually because of someone else’s ignorance.

It was a miracle you put up with Billy for all these years. You had told him trying went a long way with you. And he’d be damned if he stopped.

You’d already rid yourself of your jeans when he reached your bedroom.

“What happened?” Billy asked, leaning against the doorway.

You had your shirt halfway off when it got too tight, and you had to shimmy it the rest of the way. And with a frustrated huff, you whipped it onto the floor.

“Ran into Tommy 'Dickhead' Hagan.” You opened the drawer Billy was using and grabbed one of his shirts. “Haven’t been in Hawkins two fucking minutes, and I see the guy I wanna deck the most.”

You hadn’t noticed Billy walking toward you until he grabbed both of your hands, putting one on the back of his neck and the other on his belt loop. You automatically started playing with his curls and rubbing the denim between your fingers.

“What happened?” he asked again, much gentler, eyes patient.

You inhaled deeply, trying to keep yourself from losing it.

“Said he was surprised you and I were ‘still a thing.’ That he ‘figured you’d drop my ass after you got some ass.’” You really wished you were the type of person that would bitchslap an asshole.

To his credit, Billy didn’t react besides squeezing your shoulders. He was waiting for you to finish.

“And what did you say?”

You bit your lip, your words finally coming to you after your mind had gone fuzzy at Tommy’s comment.

“Told him a twenty-six-year-old should grow up and stop inviting high schoolers to keggers. And to stop having keggers,” you said.

Billy threw his head back with laughter, and you joined him, stepping forward so you could lean your forehead on his chest.

“You should’ve seen the look on his face when I said, ‘Hope you have the day you deserve.’” Your giggling only increased when Billy wrapped his arms around you and lifted you to the bed.

“Was he smart enough to get what you were saying?” Billy leaned over you, one arm supporting him over your head.

“Must be, ‘cause I thought I saw steam coming out his ears as I left,” you said, cupping his neck and running your thumb along his jaw.

He nudged your nose with his. “Good. Jackass deserved it.” He pulled back slightly so he could look you in the eyes. “M’proud of you. Standing up for yourself. Know it’s hard sometimes.”

You gave him a small smile. “Was standing up for you, too. You don’t deserve to be spoken about like that. Not after all the work you’ve done. All the ways you’ve grown.”

Your hand moved to caress his cheek, and he kissed your palm.

“Couldn’t have done it without you,” he mumbled, leaning into your touch.

“Couldn’t have stood up to Tommy without you,” you said.

Billy smiled. “Guess we’re pretty good for each other.”

“We’re great for each other.”

He hummed and situated himself so he laid on top of you, face buried in the crook of your neck.

“Remember, we’re meeting everyone at Steve’s in two hours,” you said, drawing patterns on his back.

His grin pressed into your throat. “What are we gonna do with two hours?”

You rolled your eyes, a fond smile growing. “Less than two hours.”

He pulled back to look at you. “We’re the guests of honor. Just tell them we got in later than expected.”

You raised a brow at him. “After what happened at the store? I’m sure the whole town knows we’re here by now.”

He huffed, pushing his face back where it was, and mumbled, “Fucking Hawkins.”

You giggled and kissed his forehead, feeling him smile even though he wanted to pout.

“How about a half hour of this, then we get ready?” you asked.

He hummed. “We’ll see. Might take a nap.”

“A half-hour nap.”

He placed a finger on your lips. “Shh, I’m napping.”

You bit his finger lightly, and he scraped his teeth along your neck.

Your breath hitched, and he chuckled.

“Maybe I can do something else in that half hour,” he mused, kissing your jaw.

You let out a content sigh as he continued his path until he reached your lips.

Part of him hoped you would both run into Tommy again after this weekend. Billy would gladly show him how together you were once that ring was on your finger.

Taglist: @moonlightfountain, @steph-speaks, @bookshelf-dust

If you’d like to be added to any taglists, please comment or message me with the character you’d like updates on.

Life Guard

(Billy Hargrove x Female Reader)

Synopsis: It's the middle of summer and everyone decides to go to the pool. You don't know how to swim, but at least Billy's on duty.

Warnings: Language, almost drowning, protective Billy

Word Count: 3169

A/N: Here's that protective Billy fic I was talking about! Also, is the title cheesy? It's definitely cheesy. Should I change it? And I just had to use this gif. I mean, look at his back!

The hottest day of the year meant one thing: pool day. Everyone had agreed to meet there after picking up their assigned children.

“I’m pretty sure this is what Hell feels like,” Erica said after closing her door.

You chuckled and agreed, pulling out of the Sinclair driveway.

“You both brought your sunscreen, right,” you asked, looking in your rearview mirror at Lucas and Erica.

They nodded.

“Good. Max?” You glanced toward her before turning back to the road.

“Do you really need to ask?” She tugged gently at her hair.

“Just checking,” you said. “I have extra if anyone needs it.”

It didn’t take you long to reach the pool. When you arrived, Steve, Robin, and Dustin were already there.

You caught the last second of Steve cannonballing and splashing Dustin when Robin waved you all over.

“Finally! The testosterone was becoming too much!” Robin said, dramatic as ever.

“Have you been here long?” You set your bag beside the lounger and took a seat. Max, Lucas, and Erica didn’t waste any time jumping in.

“Ten whole minutes,” she whined, making you chuckle.

“Then it’s a good thing I got here when I did,” you said, grinning.

You relaxed into your chair after slipping your sandals off. The umbrella provided enough coverage to keep the sun off you. It was as cool as you were going to get out here.

Not knowing how to swim certainly put a damper on things during the summer months, but it was never something you were in a rush to learn. For you, summer meant working and saving up for college, not hanging out at the pool—one of the many reasons your friends insisted you come with them. They all knew you couldn’t swim. They also knew a public pool wasn’t the most conducive to learning, but you knew it’d be fine. Robin and Nancy would sit and chat with you anyway. The boys and the kids were the ones who took full advantage of the water.

“So,” Robin grinned, leaning in closer, “who do you think's gonna get water up their nose first?”

You tapped your chin as if in serious thought. “Dustin.”

“I was thinking the same.” She nodded as if you had concluded an important meeting.

Said child seemed to be having a race with Steve and Lucas toward the deep end while Erica and Max were leaning on pool noodles and laughing.

Faintly, a lifeguard’s whistle was mixed with shrieks of joy and splashes. The piece of metal fell to the guard’s exposed chest. Your eyes trailed along his strong shoulders and neck to land on his face.

Billy.

The heat in your cheeks was no longer from the weather.

Your friendship with Billy Hargrove was unexpected, to say the least. His friendship with the rest of your group—even more so. Fighting an interdimensional monster would do that to someone.

He’d changed a lot since last summer. Fortunately, it was for the better. It was obvious in the way he handled his job here. Billy had ruled the pool with an iron fist before. Now, he was less severe. You’d been here a few times already this summer, and not once had he threatened banishment to some too-excited kid who disregarded the safety rules.

You clocked the scars along his abdomen.

It had taken months of reassurance and support for him to take his shirt off. Before then, you never would have described Billy as insecure, but the Mind Flayer stole so much from him. You were just thankful it wasn’t worse. Joyce had closed the gate right on time.

Now, he sat in his chair with his shoulders back, relaxed, and surveyed the area like he used to.

Though he wore sunglasses, you knew he was looking at you when his head stopped in your direction.

You gave him a small smile and a little wave, and he answered with a flirty smirk of his own.

“Get a room,” Robin groaned. “You’re both ridiculous!”

You playfully swatted her.

She’d known for a while now how you felt about Billy. She had caught you staring a little too long, then at a sleepover, made you spill. And it brought you such relief to tell someone.

“C’mon, you’ve been flirting for months!”

“You know he flirts with everyone,” you said.

“Not since what happened,” she countered. “And I know you’ve noticed it, too.”

You had, but you were sure it was just because you'd been there. He had no reason to hide from you. And that gave him the space to be himself again. It’d only be a matter of time before he was chatting up one of the women strutting by his tower trying to get his attention.

She sighed. “All I’m saying is, I think you should give it a chance.” She poked your arm. “You have chemistry, and I know you’d be good together.”

You squeezed her hand. “Thank you.”

She stood, stretching. “Anytime. Now, I’m gonna get something from the vending machine. Any requests?”

“Whatever you’re getting.”

She nodded, walking toward the machines.

You pulled out your book, determined to finish it before you left the pool. Or before Billy got off his shift.

“Hey, (Y/N)!” Dustin called. “Can you bring me my goggles?”

“Sure!” You scooped them up from the edge of Robin’s chair and walked over to him. “Here”

“Thanks.” He gave you that smile you loved.

“Where’s Steve?” you asked, looking around.

“He’s gonna do the high dive. I think he’s trying to impress the girl in the blue bikini,” he said, nodding across the pool.

You shook your head slightly. “He knows that won’t actually work, right?”

He shrugged. “I tried to tell him.”

“In other words, ice cream is a must after this.” You usually followed the same rulebook for Steve’s failed flirting as you did for Robin: ice cream and a bitch sesh.

“Ice cream is always a must.”

You laughed, eyes focused on his smiling face.

Maybe if you were paying more attention, you would’ve seen the little boy running to the diving boards. You may have moved in time to avoid him bumping into you and sending you straight into the deep end.

—

Billy spotted you the moment you walked toward Robin with your gaggle of children. Max had told him she’d be here with the rest of your group. So, when the first to arrive were Steve, Robin, and Dustin, he deflated a little.

Ten minutes later, he straightened and ran a hand through his hair. He hadn’t felt like this since he was a little kid. You made his stomach twist in the best possible way and your smile? He’d do anything to see it.

Every so often, he’d glance back your way. You and Robin laughed at something and his lips ticked up ever so slightly.

He always kept an eye on you. He didn’t want to miss the way your shoulders shook as you laughed. Or the smile you gave El when she wanted you to watch her hold her breath. Or the view he’d get when you bent over facing toward or away from him—he didn’t know which he preferred.

He also knew you couldn’t swim. And every time you showed up, he watched you—made sure you stayed away from the edge. Part of him wished you wouldn’t come to the pool, but the selfish side loved when you did.

It was easier when he was off duty. He didn’t have to pay attention to everyone else. He’d sit at the foot of your lounger and talk to you while the others swam. You’d poke him with your toes if he flustered you too much, and he’d grab your feet and move closer to put them on his lap. He’d graze a finger up the bottom of one, and when you went to pull away, he’d grip your ankle and laugh, promising not to do it again.

You’d ask him to reapply sunscreen to your back. And each time he’d massage it into your shoulders, your neck—his thumbs pushing the tension away—down until he reached your swimsuit, and then move onto your arms. You’d always tell him you could do that part, and he’d grunt at you, wanting to touch you a little longer.

Then, when he finished, you’d offer the same, and he’d turn around, stifling a moan when your hands rubbed his shoulders and down his spine. He’d tease you, ask if you could do his chest, to which you rolled your eyes, but did it anyway because you told him once you didn’t think he applied enough to begin with. You never said it was because you liked touching him, too.

He continued scanning the rest of the pool. It wouldn’t be long before his shift ended, and he could finally join you.

Everything was relatively calm—kids playing, parents sitting with one another, high schoolers gossiping as they floated. Everything was normal.

“(Y/N)!”

His head shot to the panicked voice, dread clawing his gut.

Dustin’s arms waved frantically at Billy.

Where were you?

And he dove in.

You were sinking, bubbles no longer escaping your mouth. And the feeling in his gut worsened as your eyes slowly closed.

He’d taken his eyes away from you for a second.

That was all it took.

Just one second.

He wrapped an arm around your waist, using the other to propel himself upward.

Dustin was still panicking and had gathered the attention of his friends, who had rushed forward when Billy emerged.

Billy vaguely noticed Steve above him.

“Help me get her out,” Billy called. “Lay her down.”

Steve hauled you by your arms, using the towel around his neck as a pillow. Billy was beside you in a moment doing compressions.

“C’mon,” he muttered before pinching your nose and pushing air into your lungs. “C’mon.”

Each press into your chest made his hurt.

He couldn’t lose you. He just couldn’t. Not like this, not when you survived so much. Not when you’d become so important to him. Not before he could tell you.

You coughed, water spurting from your throat as you instinctively turned to get it out.

Relief washed over him.

“It’s okay, baby. Just breathe,” he whispered, rubbing your back. “You’re okay. I’ve got you.”

Your coughing slowly subsided, but your breath shook, and the urge to cry crept up your nose. You’d been so close. You felt the water burning your lungs as you sunk further and further.

Billy’s body heat comforted you as you shivered. You rested your head in the crook of his neck. The warmth of his skin made you shudder at the contrast. All the energy had been drained from you. You were just so cold, so fucking scared.

“I’ve got you, honey,” he repeated, placing a towel around your shoulders. “Let’s go to a chair, okay?”

He was so gentle with you, only his tone registering, but whatever he was saying, you’d agree with.

He hooked an arm under your knees and his other around your back and walked you to one of the Adirondack chairs.

Kneeling in front of you, he covered your hands with his.

“(Y/N).”

You stared at your joined hands, wanting to burrow into him to have some semblance of warmth.

“Sweetheart, I need you to look at me,” he said.

You did.

“You’re safe now.” He used one hand to graze the side of your thigh. “How ‘bout I take you home?”

You slowly nodded. This was the last place you wanted to be. Your nerves felt so exposed here.

“Okay.” He smiled gently, brushing your forehead with his lips as he rose to his feet.

“Here,” Robin said, setting your tote beside you. She placed a hand on your shoulder, and you touched it in thanks.

Billy pulled your coverup out of it and slipped it over your head.

“C’mon,” he shouldered your bag, “let’s go home.”

His arm went around your waist as he led you through the locker room to get his belongings.

When you got to his car, he placed you in the passenger seat and hooked you.

The way to your home was silent. And that was okay. You were still trying to settle yourself, and just being out of there helped.

Billy had put a hand on your thigh, needing to remind himself that you were next to him—that you were still breathing.

It comforted you—he did that in general. Maybe in a different situation, it would fill your stomach with butterflies. But right now, it was the contact you needed.

He was right here. And so were you.

You were grateful your parents were out when you arrived. You didn’t think you could handle any questions.

Billy’s hand was at the small of your back as you walked inside and went to your room to change. And he went to the kitchen to get you some water.

You got out of that swimsuit as fast as you could. Once Billy left, all you wanted was for him to come back.

It was like your chest didn’t hurt as much when he was in your line of sight.

He’d changed out of his suit and was waiting on the couch, patting the back of it when he saw you.

“Feel any better?” he asked.

You nodded slowly. “A bit.”

“What about inside? Anything hurt?” He leaned toward you, scanning your figure like he could pinpoint those spots.

“I’m fine, Billy,” you said. “Really. Maybe a little shaky, but that’s it. You don’t…” You didn’t want him to go, but you didn’t want to force him to stay. “You can go back if you want to. I know you wanted to hang out with everyone.” You didn’t want to feel like a burden. Billy deserved more than being tied down here with you.

He didn’t speak.

He wanted to hang out with you. He may have befriended everyone else, but you were the one he wanted to be around.

You had stopped shaking and coughing. Your breathing seemed normal, and the fear in your eyes was gone. You looked more exhausted than anything.

But still, he kept flashing back to you sinking.

He could’ve lost you. If Dustin hadn’t yelled, you might not be here. And he feared if he left you now, it’d somehow all be a dream. You wouldn't be sitting next to him. You’d be at the bottom of the pool, and he’d have to live with the guilt of not being able to save you.

But you were here. And you were okay. And he had to keep reminding himself of that.

“Let me stay,” he breathed, eyes pleading.

Yours softened, and you nodded.

He gave you a grateful smile. “Good. How about a movie? You can pick anyone you want, sweetheart.”

The pet name sent shivers up your spine, and he noticed. A concerned look covered his features.

“Are you okay? Are you still cold?” he asked, scooting closer.

You shook your head. You were definitely far from cold.

“Does it hurt anywhere?”

“Billy, I’m fine,” you urged.

“You inhaled a lot of water—”

“I promise.” You put a hand over his. “I just…I like when you call me that.” You played with your fingers, avoiding his gaze.

His face pulled in confusion. When he called you what?

He tried to think of what you were talking about, and then it dawned on him. He hadn’t even noticed he’d been doing it.

A grin spread across his face.

“You like it when I call you ‘sweetheart’?” He moved, his knee touching yours.

You nodded slightly.

“What about ‘honey’?” His head tilted so he could try and meet your eyes.

Again, you nodded, but the smallest of smiles tugged at your lips.

“And ‘baby’?” He lifted your chin with a finger, and your breath hitched.

“Yes,” you whispered. “I like it.”

“How would you feel if I used them all the time?”

You bit the inside of your cheek, but the smile still spread. “I’d like it.”

“And what if I wanted to use them in front of our friends? Would you be okay with that?” he asked, leaning in.

“Only if you asked me out first,” you said.

He chuckled. “Could I still kiss you right now?”

“You better.”

His lips pressed against yours a second later. He tasted like mint and the barest traces of smoke and chlorine. He pulled you into his lap so you straddled him, and your hands cupped both sides of his neck. 

You loved how warm he was. Every time you saw him, you wanted to burrow beneath his clothing and find a home there. You didn’t know if it was his Cali sun-kissed skin, or maybe the fire from his cigarettes, or a combination of both, but it was entirely Billy.

His hand trailed up your back to your neck, his other gripping your thigh, trying to plant you there. And part of you wished he’d squeeze harder so the bruises would remind you of this moment.

But you had to pull away.

You panted into each other's mouths, foreheads pressed together. And his hands slid to your waist and wrapped around you, hugging you to him.

“There’s somethin’ I have to tell you,” he whispered, lips brushing your cheek.

“You can tell me anything,” you said, thumb rubbing his jaw.

“I love you.”

You pulled back to look at him better. “What?”

“I,” he cleared his throat, “I love you.”

You caught the panic in his eyes, but before he could move, you put your hands atop his.

“I love you,” you breathed, smiling.

He laughed, cupping your cheeks to kiss you—soft and sweet, and it felt like love.

“Does this mean I can call you ‘baby’?” you asked, a teasing lit to your voice.

He grinned, pulling you closer by your hips. “You better.”

He kissed you again, and you had the passing thought that you could do this all the time.

—

The next time you went to the pool, Billy had a lounger and umbrella for you right behind the lifeguard chair.

He greeted you with a kiss, his hand slipping down to squeeze your ass. But you caught it. As much as you liked how physical he was, you weren’t about to let the other pool goers see.

“You shouldn’t have anything to worry about, honey. Just sit back and relax,” he said.

“Why’s that?” you asked, pushing one of his curls behind his shoulder.

“‘Cause I banned that little shit.” He shrugged.

“I’m pretty sure you can’t actually do that,” you said, laughing lightly.

“But he doesn’t.” He kissed you again. “I’ve got you, sweetheart. Now, enjoy the show.” He winked, then reclaimed his place on his chair.

You shook your head slightly but did as he said. And at one point, when you called out a ‘baby’ to get his attention, you knew the flush on his cheeks wasn’t from the sun.

Kinkmas Day 2! Billy Hargrove x Reader(Spanking)

TW: Spanking, Fingering, squirting, slightly Mean!Billy, maybe toxic!billy(if you squint), Soft!Billy, aftercare.(I believe that's it but lemme know if I missed any!)

(A/n: This is super late but I lowkey forgot so sorry abt that. Also I mentioned a taxi once or twice here and they probably don’t have taxis in Hawkins cause it's a small town but lets pretend ok. Also, There's like 2 maybe 3 time skips to get to the Smut faster. Anddd I wrote this at like 5 am so sorry if there is misspelling  Lol, Anyways enjoy.)

Word Count: 2.1k

“Do you have to tell him when you got out all the time?” Claire asks as we get dressed in her room. 

“No. He just worries a lot so I tell him so he doesn't.” I tell her, buttoning up my jeans. 

“Mhmm, sure.” She replies in an unconvincing way. I roll my eyes. Turning around to look at her. 

“You ready? I told Billy that I'd be home by 11 and it's 9 now. I wanna get hom ebay then because he said he has a surprise for me!” I said, getting a little excited. 

“Yeah yeah, lets go, it takes like 10 minutes to get there so lets bounce.” She said, grabbing her house keys and walking out the front door. Locking it once I'm outside too. 

“We’ve got everything? Keys, wallet?” I ask, just making sure before we actually leave. 

“Yep! Let's get going. Hopefully the line isn’t too long” She said, walking down the driveway. I follow after her. 

“We can always use our special charm! You know, being a woman and all!” I smirk, sending her a wink when she turns around to give me a quick look. 

“Jeez Y/n. You are such a weirdo!” She exclaimed. Getting into the taxi she called 15 minutes ago to come get us, me getting in behind her. 

*Time skip to the bar. 1 hour in*

The music is bumping in the background. Claire found someone to dance with about 20 minutes ago and since then I've been sitting here slowly sipping on my 4th drink tonight. A Bronx Cocktail. 

Looking around, I spot a pair of green eyes staring at me, a male, maybe one or two years older than me. 

I smile and look away, not noticing them coming my way. 

I take another sip of my drink, feeling a tap on my shoulder. 

“Excuse me miss, I noticed you're all alone and was wondering if you'd like to dance?” He asked, politely, might I add. Totally surprising to me. 

I blush, realizing I haven’t answered him yet. 

“Oh I’m sorry. No, I actually have a boyfriend so I don’t think that would be appropriate but thank you for the offer.” I told him, giving him a small smile. 

He smiled and nodded, “understandable. Well then, you have a nice night…”

“Y/n” I told him, “And you have a nice night too…:

“Shane” he said. 

“Well you have a nice night too Shane” I said. Giving him one more small smile and a wave as he walks away. 

A couple moments later, Claire stumbled over. 

“Who was that?!” She asked, hiccuping after. 

I grab her hand, helping her sit down, waving the bartender over to ask for a glass of water.

He sets it down and I push it in her hands. 

“Down this and then I'll tell you.” I told her. 

She rolls her eyes, ”Yes mother.” She said, downing it and slamming the glass down after, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. 

“Better?” I ask. 

She shrugs, “Kinda. Now, tell me. Who was that?” She asks again, shaking my shoulders. 

I chuckle, shaking my head, “That was Shane, I just met him tonight, he asked me to dance but I told him I had a boyfriend and he totally understood. We said goodnight to each other and he walked away. It was nothing.” I explained to her what happened. 

She shook her head. Getting another water. 

“He asked you to dance?” She asked. 

“Yes” I answered her. 

“And you said no?” She asked, like she was double checking I really did that. 

Annoyed, I nodded, “Yes! He asked to dance and I said no. I Have. A. Boyfriend. Claire. One that I don’t think would approve of me dancing with another guy.” I said. 

Leaning over, she took my shoulders, Looking me in my eyes. 

“Look girl, I’m not telling you what to do, you can do whatever you want. I just want you to have fun, and sitting here by yourself when I'm over there dancing, isn't fun. Now it's 10:30, before you have to get back, maybe asking for a dance, even just one could be fun. But if you just wanna sit here, by yourself for the next 20 minutes, then by all means go ahead. However, I am going to go back over there and dance with Danny, and then maybe go home with him, if you know what I mean.” She said, winking. 

I laughed, shaking my head, “I know what you mean. I just, isn’t it cheating if I dance with another guy?” I ask her. 

She shook her head, “No, not if you guys are friends and it's friendly. You said it yourself that he understood you had a boyfriend. If you just ask him to dance as friends, you're fine. And even if it's one dance, it can still be fun before you leave.” She explained. 

I nodded, ”Yeah, I guess you're right.” I said, thinking about it. 

“You don’t have to of course, but you have 15 minutes and like I said, one dance couldn't hurt and could be fun. Just think about it, ok?” she asks, standing back up, getting ready to head back over to Danny. 

I nod for what feels like the hundredth time tonight, leaning over to kiss her cheek.

“Thanks babe. I'll see you later ok. Call me when you get home or call me in the morning if you don’t go home tonight. If I don’t hear from you by noon tomorrow, Imma call the police. Understand missy.” I tell her, jokingly but also serious. 

“Yes, yes, I understand. I'll call you later. Love you!” She yelled, already walking away. 

“Love you too!” I yelled back. Turning back towards the bar. 

I sigh, rubbing my head before finally making up my mind. 

“Excuse, Sir? Can I get a shot of tequila please? Thanks” I said as he set it in front of me. 

I grab the glass, counting to three before taking the shot, making a face at how strong it was before shaking my head. 

I stand up, smoothing down my shirt, turning around, ready to have a bit of fun. 

*Time skip. 45 minutes later*

“You did not!” I exclaim, slapping Shane's arm as I die of laughter. 

“Yup, I totally did. I looked him up and down and showed him a shrimp. He was being a complete asshole and he deserved it for talking to my sister like that.: He said, laughing along with me. 

“That's Hilarious!” I said, still laughing. 

“What hilarious?” I hear a deep voice ask behind me. My eyes go wide before I quickly stand up and turn around. 

“Baby.” I said in a greeting. Walking over to Billy, I grab his hand. 

“What are you doing here?” I ask him. 

“It’s 11:30. I got worried” He said, his voice holding no emotion, his eyes staring holes into Shane's head. 

“It Is?! Oh my gosh, babe I'm so sorry I must have lost track of time. Lemme go close my tab and we can go ok?” I tell him, kissing his cheek before walking past him to the bar. 

I do that real quick before walking back over, Billy in the same spot where I left him. 

“Okay I'm good. Let's go.” I said, walking over to the table where Shane was at to grab my purse. 

“Oh yeah! Baby, this is Shane, we met tonight and he was telling me about how this guy was an asshole to his sister and all that. It was so funny. Anyways, sorry about this Shane. It was nice talking to you.” I said, grabbing my purse and waving at him, grabbing Billy’s hand and walking to the door. 

Shane waved back and in a second we were out the door. 

Walking to the car, Billy opens my side for me before shutting it once I'm in. He walks around the car and gets in, turning it on and backing out. 

Doing all this, unusually quietly. 

“Hey,” I said, grabbing his hand, “You ok?” I ask

He clenches his jaw, “You were 30 minutes Late because you were talking to some guy! What the hell Y/N?! I thought we said 11 because of the surprise I had?” He asked, slightly angry. 

“I'm so sorry baby. I didn’t mean to lose track of time. It won’t happen again, I promise” I said. Leaning over to kiss his cheek in reassurance. 

“I know it is not. Not after I teach you a lesson.” He said quietly, I almost didn't hear it. 

“W-what? What's that supposed to mean?” I asked.

His hand left the steering wheel, putting it on my thigh. Gripping it kinda hard. 

“You’ll see when we get home,” he said. And that was it for the rest of the car ride. 

Nothing but silence. 

Once home, he opens the door and lets me go in first. Smacking my butt a little to hurry me up. 

“Go in the room and get undressed. Everything off in 2 minutes” He said in my ear, walking off into the bathroom before I could ask questions. 

Part of me wanted to see what would happen if I didn’t but the other half didn’t want to see what would happen so I went with the second one. 

Walking in, I quickly undress and sit on the bed, waiting for Billy to come out. 

A couple minutes go by, when the door creaks open and he walks in shirtless. His jeans unbuttoned but zipped up. 

He walks over, and sits down. Looking at me then patting his lap. 

Thinking he meant to sit on his lap, I go to do that when he stops me. 

“No baby, lay across my legs, ass up dove.” He said. 

I slowly do as he says, slightly confused. 

He rubs my ass softly, massaging it almost. Until I feel a sting on it. 

“Ow!” I said, trying to get up but his arms held me down. 

“Hey- Billy , what are you doing?” I ask. 

“Teaching you a lesson dove. Now count for me. If you refuse or stop for longer than 5 seconds, we're starting over. Understand?’ He states more than ask.

I just nod, not wanting to make a big deal and just get this over with. 

“Good girl. Now let’s start”

He rubs my ass before I feel a smack.

“Count!” He demands after I don’t say anything.

“O-one” I say almost breathlessly. 

“Hmm” he hums, smacking my ass again. 

*A couple mins later*

“T-Twenty” I said, stuttering, Tears running down my face. 

He rubs my ass, soothing it a little. 

“Good job baby. We're all done. You did so good for me.” He says softly, still caressing my ass.

His hands, go over from one cheek to the other then slowly moving down until,

“Ohhhh”, I moan, my eyes rolling back. 

He slowly moves his finger in and out of my, then adds a second one. 

“Since you did so good for me baby, you can get a little reward.” he said, starting to move his fingers faster. 

I grip the sheets, moaning out. 

 I feel my orgasm start to come unbelievably fast. 

“I'm gonna, Oh god Billy! I'm gonna cum!” I screamed, cumming around his fingers. 

He slows down his fingers but doesn’t stop, helping me ride out my orgasm. 

“Okay baby, I'm gonna pick you up and lay you down. You made a mess so I gotta change the covers really quick.” Billy said, slowly pulling his finger out of me and removing me from his lap, taking the covers and then laying me down. 

I yawn, “Mess? I made a mess?” I ask, confused but also very tiredly. 

“You squirted all over my fingers and the blankets dove.” he said. Walking back over with a new blanket, shirt and a tube of something. 

I hmm, not really caring anymore about anything except sleep. 

“Alright dove, let's put this on, sit up really quick,” he says, helping me sit on a sore butt to slide a shirt on really quick. 

“Okay now lay on your stomach, I'm gonna rub this ointment on your but ro help and then we can cuddle ok?” he says, Putting some cool ointment on my burning hot ass. 

I nod, totally out of it now. 

“There we go. All done! Alright dove, let's go to bed.” He said, getting up to wash his hands and then turn off the bedroom light. 

He pulls the covers over you both, carefully putting his arm around you, mindful of your butt. 

He nuzzles his head into your neck, “I love you, you know that right?” he asks, but you're already knocked out. 

He chuckles and closes his eyes. So much for the surprise.

i cannot get billy hargrove off my mind. like the things i would let this man do to meeee. it's insane. he could use me for weeks on end and crush my body with his car into millions of pieces, and if he asked me to be his girlfriend i would still say yes.

(another repost lmao)

being billy hargrove's bimbo gf that he likes to spoil.

he buys you everything. you saw a skirt that you liked in the mall? he's bringing it to you the next day. a pretty necklace? it's yours. it could be something as small as a bag of candy, but when you give him those pleading eyes; he can't help but give in.

not only does he buy you everything you ask for, he buys some things that are more for his enjoyment. he'll get you the skimpiest little outfits, and of course you'll happily prance around in them. he makes you do a fashion show of everything he buys you, but his favorite part is when you try on all the new lingerie he buys you.

of course, these specific pieces of clothing never last long, within a week or two, they're all in shreds. but billy will happily buy you more.

gosh i want billy to manhandle me with his big strong arms :(

I'm right here.

Billy Hargrove x Reader. (pure fluff) Request:@zero-spacee Summary: Y/N has horrible nightmares about BIlly dying and Billy comforts her

It had been 2 months. Two long and hard months after the events of summer. The worst summer in Yn's life. When her life had turned upside down. Literally. It had scarred her, scared her, and made her cling to her boyfriend. Billy, Who had barely survived the battle in the mall, Sometimes she woke up. Terrified. Her mind is hazy with sleep making her believe things that weren't real. She was scared to go to sleep. She was scared of being alone. And so it was that Billy convinced her to move in with him and Max.

Yn looked up from the place where she was laying her head on her chest as they were in his bedroom one night. After she had called Billy terrified to pick her up from her house.

"Really?" She asked quietly looking down at him in the dim light of his room.

"Sure, you can stay, and honestly. I feel better if you were here" he replied softly brushing a stray hair from her face and looking at her with soft eyes, Yn realized that he too was still struggling with nightmares but wouldn't admit it.

"What about Max?"

"Don't worry about her babe. She already loves you. Besides, she would feel better if you were here too. She won't admit it but she kind of needs some...sisterly figure?"

"Doesn't she have El for that?"

"How about I just want you to be here and I don't care if Max likes it?" He suggested with a small smirk.

Yn gave him a playful deadpan expression "That is rude.."

Billy ran a hand down her back and pulled her close to him again pressing a kiss to her temple "Stay" he whispered.

Yn rested close against him wrapping her arms around his torso "Always" she murmured back.

And that was how Yn ended up living with Billy and Max. Max had been a little reluctant to it but then warmed up to her. But one thing that didn't change, even though they diminished was the nightmares. She woke up at night screaming and crying and Billy sometimes had to hold her for hours for her to fall asleep again finally. She wasn't the only one. Once she woke up at night because of crying. And she slipped out of Billy's room to find Max trashing in her bed. Yn had stayed with her the whole night soothing the younger girl. Since then she and Max had grown closer.

Even through it, Billy didn't exactly show when he had nightmares. Though sometimes Yn woke up to him holding onto her tightly, tighter than usual, as he slept. Yn would run her hands through his hair absentmindedly through the night. But didn't wake him up, knowing it would hurt his pride if he knew that she had seen him in such a vulnerable state.

It was messy and somehow complicated how they lived. But the 3 of them managed. And everything went smoothly by.

One morning though Yn woke up from a night of nightmares, she reached her hand to the side of the bed Billy slept in but found it cold and empty, she sat up rubbing her eyes from sleep and her nightmares rushed back.

her mind was still clouded with sleep and she started shaking and tears pooled in her eyes, what if Billy was dead? what if it was true? sobs shook her body and she tucked her knees into her chest hiding her face in them. "he's dead, he's dead" she repeated through sobs.

Max who was ready to go to school already, knocked on the door of the room and paused when she heard cries, she immediately opened the door of the room and rushed to Y/N's side.

"Y/N what's wrong?" she asked taking the older girl by the shoulders with green eyes searching her teary face.

"he's dead" Y/n cried "he's dead Max, he's dead" she repeated again and again.

Max froze before she hugged her trying to comfort her and calm her down, trying to soothe her.

"Y/N he isn't dead" Max repeated again and again but Y/N was too into crying to understand the words and kept crying.

Billy who had gone out for a run early in the morning to clear his head from the nightmares that plagued his sleep arrived home, and his heartbeat sped up when he heard crying, he rushed to the room he shared with Y/N and paused at the door to see his crying girlfriend and his little sister trying to comfort her, his feet carried him to her side and he knelt by her side.

"Y/N what's wrong?" he asked worried his eyes searching her form for any visual injury.

Y/N lifted her teary face to see him and a choked sob left her and she flung her arms around his neck burying her face into his shoulder "I thought you were dead" she said between tears.

A small relieved sigh left Billy once he realized it had only been a nightmare that scared her and nothing else, he took her in his arms. "she's ok, you can go to school" he told Max.

Max hesitated for a moment before she nodded and left the room.

Billy sat down on the edge of the bed with Y/N in his arms, he ran a hand comfortingly up and down her back. he kissed the side of her temple. "it's fine baby I'm here" he told her softly.

It took a long while for Y/N to calm down, but Billy held her all along, only moving to sit back against the headboard of the bed Y/N tucked in his chest clinging to him. Once she was calm enough she just lay there tracing a random pattern in Billy's arm.

"where were you?" Yn asked quietly

"I was taking a run around the block" Billy answered.

"Oh..." was all that Y/N replied

"I'm sorry" she added quietly after a while.

Billy frowned and looked down at her "For what?" he asked gently.

"For being so...for not being able to handle myself, for not being able to control my emotions, for not-"

Billy shushed her before she could keep going "Y/N it's ok, I love you" he told her pushing a few strands away from her face and kissing her forehead. "I'm right here. I'll always be right here"

Y/N looked at his grey eyes "Promise?"

"Promise" Billy replied putting a hand on the side of her face "Always" he whispered and then leaned his head down to press his lips softly against hers.

Y/N sighed softly against the kiss and kissed him back tilting her head up to kiss him better.

Billy parted the kiss and pressed a kiss at the tip of her nose, then kissed the side of her neck. his mouth traveled up to her ear "Always" he whispered again, making a shiver run down Y/N's spine.

Ok i am going to stop here 'cause the request was for fluff not smut...but God do i want to add some! But I hope you enjoyed and have a great day!❤️

p.s. sorry for the long wait

I wanna be described this way by someone..😭

Wicked Sensation

part thirteen // Billy Hargrove x f!reader

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven | part twelve | part thirteen

a/n: hey guys my inbox is open!!! please send requests ❤️

word count: 6.6k

warnings: 18+ minors dni, angst, drinking, sex mentioned, cheating mentioned

taglist(i love you all): @blue-eyed-lion @bbyhargrove @briefmongerfishzonk-blog @sweet-villain @actuallyspencerreid @trapistani @sierrahhh

Orange hues light up your room as your alarm blares. The clock reads 5:00 and you have to pull yourself from your sheets. Well you got three hours of sleep, that’s not too bad. Laying in bed by nine last night, you had the right idea but you’re thoughts swarmed excessively and no matter how hard you had tried, you couldn’t feel sleepy. Counting sheep, reading and being aware of your breathing had all failed. You were too nervous and excited to sleep. You knew you could sleep on the plane anyways.

You had thankfully packed all your bags and left them by the front door last night. The only thing you had to do before leaving was get dressed and brush your teeth. As you file through your dresser, your stomach feels like you’re about to drop on a roller coaster. Plane rides did make you nervous but what this trip could turn out to be made you more nervous. You were hoping this meant getting back together but you decided you’d let Billy make the first move and if he never did, then you’d accept that. You couldn’t imagine a world where you could be just be friends. You desired him too deeply, there was no way you’d be able to curb that feeling for him. You hear a knock at the door and your heart swells. He’s here. You quickly dress in comfortable clothes, a t-shirt and leggings with your Reeboks. You rush to brush your teeth, bouncing on your feet with excitement.

“Honey?” you hear your dad call out, “Billy’s here! You awake? We’ve got to get going soon.”

“Be right there!” you shout around your toothbrush.

After rinsing your mouth, you splash a bit of Jean Naté on your neck before you run out to the kitchen. Billy’s standing there, looking exhausted but still dressed in his 501’s.

“It’s like a five hour flight,” you remind Billy, “Are you gonna be comfortable in jeans?”

He smiles at you, “I wear these almost every day. I’ll be fine.”

Your dad interrupts the moment, “Alright, you kids ready to go?”

You both nod, Billy grabs onto your suitcase to lug it out and you fight the urge to kiss his cheek as you walk out to your dads station wagon.

“Did you wanna give me the keys to Camaro?” your dad asks Billy, “so I could go and start it every few days? Make sure it’s still alive when you get back?”

Billy laughs, a little surprised he hadn’t thought of it himself. He reaches into his pocket and hands your dad the keys.

“Please,” he says, “I mean hell, if you feel obligated to bring the baby into the shop for a tune up I wouldn’t be mad.”

The interaction has your stomach flipping and your heart swelling. You imagine one day being married to Billy and him getting along with your dad like this. You wanna climb into the back with Billy and sit in his lap the whole way to the airport. But you push everything down. You’d promised yourself you’d let him make the first move. This trip was between two friends. One of those friends desired the other carnally but hey, still friends. You could behave yourself.

You do feel like a married couple once you get to the airport and argue about how to spend the brief hour you have before the flight. And another argument about what to do during your layover. You can’t help but think that prior to the break up, you two would’ve spent the hour and a half layover fucking in some deserted bathroom. You’re a little hopeful that might still happen. But Billy passes out during the first flight.

You watch him, so entirely tempted to hold onto him in any way you can. You don’t, but you don’t stop yourself from admiring him while he sleeps. He looks so peaceful and everything about Billy makes your heart skip a beat. His nose, so cute and button like as he breathes through it. His eyes seem active under his eyelids, like he’s having an incredible dream. You wanna hear about every dream he’s ever had. You pine for him to tell you every thought he’s ever had, and you think maybe this breakup could actually make you two closer. You suddenly longed for him in such a different way.

As if on cue, you feel the deep stabbing of guilt in your chest and suddenly you feel like crying. You had tried your hardest to justify to yourself why you’d cheated on Billy but when it came down to it, you were really just being selfish. You were broken, you’d repeated your mother’s behaviors which made you feel worse because you had always been so mad at her for doing that to your family. And instead of ending things, your dad demanded more control of your mom, which just pushed her away. He screened her phone calls, read her mail and wouldn’t let her leave the house unless he went with. You think you expected Billy to do the same. That was also selfish of you. In fact, now, you couldn’t believe he was sitting next to you on this plane. You didn’t deserve that and you wanted to tell him as much but were scared to bring up the situation at all.

An hour or so passes and you succumb to sleep as well. When Billy wakes, your resting your head on his shoulder and sleeping soundly. He smiles to himself, but when you start to rouse, he jerks away and you look at him with sleepy eyes.

“Sorry,” you mumble, wiping the bit of drool on the corner of your mouth.

“It’s fine,” he replies, checking his watch to see how long you’ve both been asleep. He sighs, realizing there’s still an hour before the layover.

He thinks about what to talk to you about, the awkwardness between you is heavy and rather unbearable for him. Luckily, he doesn’t have to say anything because you’re reaching for your Walkman in your backpack. He peers over curiously as you rummage through the mess of cassettes you’ve brought. He chuckles when you decide on an INXS tape, he’d only heard whatever songs of theirs played on the radio and he’s impressed by your range of taste. You weren’t elitist about your music like most people were, like he was.

Billy’s never really flown before. One time when he was a boy but he barely remembered it. He had a slight fear that because the worst things always happened to him that the plane would malfunction and barrel down onto some random field in the middle of America. He reaches into his pocket for his smokes knowing the nicotine would calm him down. He nudges you, pointing to the armrest where the ashtray is hidden underneath your limb. You shoot him a cordial smile before crossing your arms to give him access. He even offers you a hit from the Marlboro but your stomach is already too upset, so you shake your head. You could wait until the layover. However, the second hand smoke gets to you and you have to close your eyes and focus on your breathing so you don’t throw up all over your lap. You end up falling asleep again.

Billy shakes your shoulder gently and you open your eyes to see him standing in the seat and you look out the window to see you’ve made it to Arizona. You grin, excited to stretch your legs. Billy’s ever the gentlemen, grabbing your carry on and lugging it around with his own. You find it immensely sweet, surprised that he would even look at you after what you’ve done. You couldn’t even look at yourself in the mirror.

“Are you hungry?” you ask, bringing your headphones from around your head to rest on your shoulders.

Billy shrugs, “I could eat something, I guess.”

Your stomach coils, wanting everything to go back to normal. You long for his laughter, for that light you used to see in him. You royally fucked it up, you took that light and doused it in water when you should’ve been fueling it.

You two settle into a fast food joint and after a moment of silence, you finally speak up, “I’m really sorry, Billy. I can’t even put it into words. I just… I know I really fucked up and I would fix it. I’d go back in time or I don’t know.”

Your face is hot and your voice echoing into your ears burns.

Billy just looks at you with furrowed brows, he goes to say something but seems to overthink it. With a sigh he tells you, “This isn’t when I want to have that conversation.”

“You’re right, I’m sorry, this trip is supposed to be fun,” you deflect, sinking in your chair as you stare at the meal he’d bought you, appetite vanished.

“No, we’re going to have that conversation soon. Just not in a fucking airport,” Billy says pointedly.

For some strange reason, the anger is his voice is completely welcomed by you. You think it means he cares, that he’s not completely too far past getting back together. The look on his face might say otherwise but you know him well enough, he’s here and he’s buying your lunch and he’s carrying your luggage. Billy shows it in small but meaningful ways.

Nodding, you pick up a few fries and force them down. “I wonder what car my dad rented us,” an attempt to change the subject, to make things lighthearted.

Billy grins then, eyes lighting up, “I know what I’d pick.”

You playfully roll your eyes before breaking into a giggle, imagining him driving some hot red convertible with a surfboard sticking out from the backseat. It’s such an easy image, you’re enamored with it. At least you did one thing right, you brought him home.

“I think maybe my dad picked a station wagon, like his,” you counter and Billy pulls an annoyed face.

“Your dad wouldn’t do that to me.”

He’s right, your dad loved Billy. He told you he missed him when he’d stopped coming around and you just broke down, explaining to your dad what you’d done and how sick you felt. He encouraged you to talk to Billy, but you got cold feet every time you tried. You wondered if your dad thought less of you, now.

Soon enough, Billy’s looking at his watch and then back up at you.

“Boarding time,” he sings out, standing up and stretching his arms. His shirt rides up and you’re blessed with the view of his blonde happy trail, causing a tightness inside of you that you hadn’t felt in a while. You quickly clear the table and follow Billy to the gate, watching as his curls bounce with his steps.

Arizona to San Diego is a nice short flight, you basically go up and then back down. The stewardess doesn’t even offer refreshments which sucks because your mouth is so dry from the anticipation. You regret not buying a bottle of water or something during the layover. You let Billy have the window seat for this flight, watching him carefully for when he sees the ocean. You want to see that light inside him ignite again. And it does, his eyes look the happiest you’ve ever seen, his cheeks swollen due to the smile. You reach your hand over and squeeze his bicep, leaning to look out the window with him.

“S’pretty,” you tell him, seeing his hometown for the first time.

The scattered skyscrapers amongst a sea of buildings is such a stark contrast to little ol’ Hawkins. It must have been so difficult for Billy to adjust to. You squeeze him again at the thought.

He’s up out of his seat as soon as the plane lands, looking you impatiently so you stand up too, stepping into the aisle. You attempt to grab the carry-ons but he doesn’t let you, speed walking down the aisle once he has them. You try to keep up, following him to baggage claim where he bounces on his feet while his eyes dart around for your suitcases. He’s pushing through people once he finds them, heads turning at him as he does so.

You grab your suitcase from him, trailing it behind you as you walk towards the shuttles. You recite the company your dad told you over and over in your head, pointing to their shuttle as it pulls up. You pack into the bus, standing so close to Billy you can feel his breath on your face. It’s minty and warm and so intoxicating.

As you trail up to the counter, you pull out the papers your dad gave you. Sliding them across the counter, you smile at the girl. She lifts them up and gives you an incredulous look.

“You don’t look like a Billy Hargrove,” she says and Billy steps up behind you.

“That’s because I am,” he says, pulling out his wallet.

He hands her his ID with a wink and her entire demeanor changes, fluttering her eyelashes and suddenly all smiles. You fight your eyeballs as they try to roll.

“Enjoy your Corvette, Mr. Hargrove,” she says as she hands the keys over.

“Corvette?” he cocks an eyebrow at you, seeing that you’re just as stunned as he is.

The two of you follow her directions in the parking lot, walking up to a bright red convertible. You both gawk at it, you’re trying to figure out how your father as paid for it when Billy lets out a loud, happy laugh.

“I could kiss your dad,” he says, his tone excitedly shifting.

You scoff, “Please, don’t.”

But you smile. You wished you had a video camera to record this moment for your dad. You help him load your luggage into the small trunk, playing Tetris with the suitcase and backpacks. When he gets into the front seat, he starts feeling the dash with his hands and shaking his head as he laughs.

“Would you like to be alone with her?” you tease, tossing your head back to look at him.

He laughs again at your joke, “Maybe. No, I want you to watch.”

“Kinky,” you throw back, raising your eye brows.

He slides the keys into the ignition and rubs the dash, “Come on, baby. Purr for me.”

That’s it. You’re turned on by a man talking dirty to a car. Awesome.

He turns the ignition, bringing the engine to life and surprising you both as a Men At Work song blasts loudly through the speakers making you both jump. Billy’s hand quickly turns the dial, mumbling as he does so, “Well that ruined the moment.”

“Aw, you don’t like Men At Work?” you ask, mocking disappointment as you grab your bag full of cassettes.

“No,” he says, pressing the eject button but the cassette doesn’t pop out. “Oh, fuck no, please no.”

You turn to look, a devious smile spreading over your face, “Looks like you’re going to after this vacation.”

Billy shakes his head in disgust, repeatedly slamming the button with his finger before giving up with a sigh and hitting the AM/FM button. He scans through the stations until he finds his favorite station and the disc jockey’s voice fills him with nostalgia.

“So we headed to the beach now?” he asks with hopeful eyes.

You shake your head, “I gotta wash the plane off me first. Then beach.”

He chuckles, putting the car into gear and driving out of the parking lot. “Where are we staying?” he asks and you pull out the paperwork, scanning over it to find the motels name.

“Uh… Sunset Motel,” you start to rattle the address and Billy’s reciting it in sync with you. “Been there before?”

“Once or twice,” he smirks.

You wince as you feel a slight twinge of jealousy, “Oh, god, you didn’t lose your virginity there did you?”

Billy laughs and looks over at you, “No, no. I took a couple there.”

“I don’t know if that’s worse. Where did you lose it?” you ask, genuinely curious.

He scratches the side of his nose and smiles, “Summer Camp.”

You nod, frowning in amusement, “Stereotypical. I like it.”

Billy asks, “What about you?” but he’s not exactly sure he wants to know the answer.

You purse your lips, it was an embarrassing story. At least to you. “It was at a party. I was a sophomore and I just wanted to get it over with.”

Billy nods, though he looks sad. You were sad about it too, though. When you looked back, you wished you’d waited. A part of you actually wished you saved it for Billy but you had no idea he existed before October. Which was a weird thought, since now you were so enthralled with him. You weren’t sure how you functioned before him.

“I worked there for a couple months,” he points, turning your attention to a mechanic shop. “Before we had to move.”

You smile, imaging him fixing up cars with oil smeared all over his face and clothes, “Did you have a uniform with your name on it?”

“Sure did. I still do,” he replies and you raise your eyebrows.

“Why didn’t you try working for my dad?” you ask, realizing maybe there was a whole side of Billy you didn’t know.

He shrugs then, “I don’t know. Missed the water so the pool seemed like fun. Besides, all I really did there was oil changes and like basic repairs.”

“Pool will be closed when we get back… I know he’d hire you in a heartbeat. If you want, that is,” you suggest, eyes trained on the blonde behind the wheel, trying to read his expression.

He glances to you, “Might have to take you up on that. I’m actually gonna need a job, I’m expecting my shit to be all packed up when I get back.”

“What? Why?” you ask, looking at him quizzically.

Billy scrunches his nose up before he speaks, “Dad’s kicking me out. Gave me two weeks to find a place and well, this is week two.”

You gasp then, “Why is he kicking you out?”

Billy gestures around, “Think it had to do with coming here.”

You feel guilty again. You just kept fucking his life up for selfish reasons. “I’m sorry,” you apologize and he shakes his head.

“I feel so…” he thinks for a beat, “relieved to be back here. I’d skip the flight back if my car wasn’t there.”

A smile tugs the corners of your lips up, thinking about staying here with him. If he’d let you.

-

Billy stands behind you as you unlock the door, all the luggage in his arms and hands. You again tried to help but he wouldn’t let you. He sees the single queen size mattress in the room and bites his lip. Well, shit, he thinks.

“This is the only room I could afford for three weeks,” you inform him, “I’ll sleep on the couch.”

Billy nods, following you into the room. He tosses your backpacks down on the bed and places his hands on his hips, looking around the room. You drag your huge suitcase over and lift it onto the bed, unzipping it and digging through the mess of clothes. You pull out what you plan to change into, grabbing your bag of toiletries along with them.

“I’ll be quick,” you say, walking to the bathroom and shutting the door behind you.

The shower feels great, considering the humidity here was thicker than at home. You shave your legs so you’re not quite as quick as you’d promised. But Billy’s lounged on the bed, just waiting, when you emerge from the bathroom.

He jumps up, “Let’s go.”

You giggle, reaching for your bag and sliding your shoes on, “Alright, alright.”

The drive is short, you’d made sure to book a motel close to a beach. You think the two of you could’ve even walked, but Billy seems excited to drive the car again. He pulls into a nearly empty parking lot and you watch as his eyes glaze, taking in the ocean this close in nine months. You can feel the euphoria radiating from him.

Since it’s rather late, it’s too cold to swim. Plus, Billy told you the ocean on this coast isn’t warm like it is in Florida. You two walk along the shore, holding your shoes in your hands. You stop and look out at the ocean, then to Billy.

“Go stand in it,” you tell him, nudging his shoulder with yours.

He looks back at you, “Come with me.”

You’d follow him anywhere. Kneeling down, you roll up his jeans for him. The two of you walk up to the tide, the temperature covers your skin in goosebumps but you feel relaxed. You watch as the waves form and crash down and you itch to reach over and lace your fingers with Billy’s. You don’t, you give him this moment to gaze at the ocean, to feel at home.

It’s starting to get dark, you’re not sure how long you’ve been standing there but you put the ball in Billy’s court, even though your stomach is screaming for some sustenance. Like he can read your mind, he sighs and looks over to you.

“Let’s get some dinner,” he offers to which you nod.

“Can we get something we can take back? Or something quick? I’m tired, the time zone change kinda messed me up, I’m sorry,” you reply, shyly.

Billy laughs then, “Just means we’ll wake bright and early. Best time to surf.”

-

You’re lying on the couch, unable to sleep. Tossing and turning, glancing up to the clock on the nightstand to gauge just how many hours have passed. So much for being tired.

You think you can hear Billy’s steady breathing, indicating he’s passed out. It’s not even late, so you try not to feel bad. Lights were turned off by nine but it’s nearing midnight. You tell yourself its because the couch is so uncomfortable but deep down you know you can’t sleep so close to Billy without being close enough to feel him.

After some thought, you sit up. You search in the dark for the robe you’d brought and your slippers. Digging in your purse, you find your pack of cigarettes and slip out the door, but not before grabbing a beer from the mini fridge. You sit on the white, plastic chair next to the door and light up the Marlboro. The smoke fills your lung and you relax instantly. Cracking open the beer, you look out at the parking lot illuminated by the Motel’s neon sign. Everything about this place is so pretty and so Billy. You imagine what he’ll smell like after being in the water, salty and musky. You close your eyes, pretending like things aren’t different, like you can go back into the room and cuddle up to him, flowering him with kisses and whispers of love.

The door opens, startling your eyes open and you let out a surprised yelp, clutching your chest as you turn to see a sleepy Billy— eyes puffy and hair wild from sleep.

“Oh my god, you scared me,” you say breathlessly.

Billy rubs his eyes, “What are you doing?”

“Couldn’t sleep. I didn’t mean to wake you up,” you answer apologetically.

He takes the seat next to yours, donned only in boxers and a white tank top. And his gold necklace but you’ve never seen him without it on. He grabs the can of beer, guzzling half of it down easily before snatching the pack of smokes without asking if he can have one.

“It’s peaceful out here,” you note softly.

He just hums as he sucks down the cigarette, eyes wandering to the ocean. He seems deep in thought and as pretty as this place is, he’s a better view and you can’t look away from him. You wonder what he’s thinking.

“There’s a rental place down the road. I bought my first board there when I was twelve,” he says and you swear he’s got some magic power to read your mind. “We’ll go there in the morning to get the gear.”

“Sounds good,” you reply nonchalantly, reaching for the beer and sipping it.

When you get back inside, he collapses on the bed and you venture back over the couch. He doesn’t say anything and eventually, you fall asleep. Though it’s a restless sleep and when the alarm starts blaring, you feel as if you had just closed your eyes. Billy slams the alarm off and shuffles around the room, getting dressed in the dark and crouching down beside you.

“Hey,” he whispers, gently shaking you.

“Hmm,” you whine.

Billy whispers again, “Time to get up.”

You turn over, “Why don’t you go without me? I’ll go tomorrow morning, I promise. I barely got any sleep.”

He chuckles softly, “Okay, princess.. er, fuck. Okay.”

You blush at the pet name, sleepily reaching over to stroke his cheek. “Is that okay? That you go alone?”

He nods, you can feel it against your palm, “I think I might need to do it alone first. Make sure I didn’t forget how and make a fool out of myself.”

“Oh, whatever,” you giggle as he pulls away.

Once he shuts the door behind him, you find the tank top he was wearing the night before and crawl into the bed with it, bringing it up to your chest and fall asleep to have the best sleep you’ve had in weeks.

Billy’s back before noon, waking you up when he unlocks the door. You sit up slowly, watching as Billy tries to juggle two surfboards and a duffel bag. You look at him curiously, one is smaller than the other and it’s hot pink.

“Isn’t she purty?” he asks, hands on his hips as he leans the boards against the wall with a giant smile.

Leaning forward on your elbows and resting your chin on your palm, you ask, “Is the pink one yours?”

“No!” he rolls his eyes, “I’m a little too advanced for that board, thank you very much.”

You giggle and look up at him. His hairs wet and you can smell the ocean on him from here. “How was it?”

Sauntering over, he drops the duffel bag in front of you, “Like I did it yesterday. So peaceful… so fun.” His smile gets even bigger as he unzips the bag and hands you a wetsuit. “I think this will fit.”

You grab the material as you sit back up, holding it out to look at it. “It should. What else are we doing today?”

Billy walks over to his suitcase, flipping it open and grabbing a change of clothes and his toiletries. “I’m gonna show you around town, there’s a spot I want to take you for lunch and a bar we can go to tonight,” he stands in the doorway of the bathroom.

“Alright,” you smile up at the blonde, “How should I dress?”

He shrugs, “However your little heart desires. No dress code anywhere.” He winks and closes the door, you can hear him start up the shower. You turn the radio on the alarm clock, turning it up as loud as it goes before you make yourself a pot of coffee, knowing you have enough time to have at least one cup because Billy’s got to style his hair.

Lighting a cigarette, you pour in the little creamer packet into your coffee and think about what clothes you brought. You two really oughta unpack or this room will be a disaster before the weeks over.

After getting dressed, you place your jewelry case on the nightstand and open it. Your fingers ritualistically pull out the necklace Billy gave you but you sigh, you can’t wear it but you tell yourself one of these days you’ll just put it on and see what he says. If he says anything. You still don the dagger earring everyday. Many attempts to take it out but you can’t bring yourself to do it. You worried he wanted it back but he’s seemed to replace it with something similar already.

A Great White song comes on the radio as you’re doing your hair in the mirror above the bed, which has proven to be a difficult task. You wobble around and almost lose your balance every time you lean one way or the other. When Billy emerges from the bathroom, you’re swinging your hips along to song as you tease up your hair and it makes you lose what little balance you had. You launch off the bed but you feel big, strong hands catch your arms and lift you to your feet.

You look up at him, cheeks red and an embarrassed smile. He smiles back at you, “Clumsy girl.”

A familiar sensation climbs up your body, the way he looks at you makes your head swim and you actually feel like you two might kiss. You’re just looking at each other, his hands still gripping your arms and your breath gets caught in your throat. Then Billy pulls away, walks to the coffee pot and pours himself a cup. Disappointment settles into your stomach.

“Will this outfit be okay?” you ask, gesturing to it while he turns to look at you. You worried the pleather leggings might be too hot but you’ve paired it with a tiny shirt you’d turned into a tank top so you figure it evens out. You see as Billy swallows the lump in his throat before he just nods, turning his attention back to the coffee. You think you won, whatever game you’re playing.

-

The bar is loud and you’re exhausted from the heat of the day. The leggings were a bad choice but you could feel Billy’s eyes on your ass anytime he was behind you so were they really?

It’s apparent that Billy frequented this place before the move, the bouncer was excited to see him and didn’t bother to ID either of you. They chitchat for a while before Billy guides you inside. It’s dark but there’s bright neon lights scattering across the ceiling and walls. It wasn’t like The Hideout at all, which is the only bar you’ve been to. People in California are much prettier than in Indiana and you feel insecure, eyes scanning over the blondes with big hair and tight skirts. Billy places his hand on your back, ushering you to the bar.

He waits patiently for the girl working to turn around, a big smirk on his face. When she does, her face opens up with shock.

“Billy fucking Hargrove! What the hell are you doing here?” she screams over the music excitedly. She hops up onto the bar and over it to hug him tightly. You awkwardly stand next to them, watching as the hug lasts longer than your comfortable with.

“Did you move back?” she asks before glaring daggers at the patrons complaining about her not doing her job.

Billy shakes his head, smirk still plastered on his face, “No, my girl,” he motions to you and it makes your heart skip, “surprised me with a little vacation back home. I’m here for three weeks.”

His girl? Was it that easy? Were you his girl again? You have a million questions but you just smile as the bartender turns to you.

“How sweet!” she reaches over and hugs you, holding onto your elbows when she pulls away, “Nice to meet you! I’m Jennifer.”

You tell her name, blushing as you do so because you’re voice isn’t loud enough over the music and she asks for it again. You blame it on the shock from Billy calling you his girl, you’re usually the loudest person in the room.

“Well, let me get you to the house special,” she says before climbing back over the bar and turning to pour two shots of Jameson and slide over two cans of PBR. You now realize why when you’d ordered that at The Hideout he said you were his kind of lady.

“To home,” Billy cheers his shot with you once you sit on the stools.

You down the shots and you wince a little, but Billy’s smile doesn’t leave his face. Him and Jennifer talk for a bit while she’s busy pouring shots for other people and you look around the bar again, watching girls dance with guys and wonder if Billy used to dance with them. Overall, you wonder what he did here. Was it all surfing and hanging out at this bar? He’d hinted in the past that it was his fault that they’d moved across the country. Something about Susan not liking his lifestyle and thinking it was a bad influence on Max. You’re sure Neil probably wasn’t too stoked on it either. It seemed like maybe he had less control over Billy out here. So many places to be while in Hawkins, everyone knew everyone and there was really no where to go and nothing to do.

Billy leans into your ear and whispers, “You can go dance if you want to.”

You’d been zoning out everything around you while you were thinking, not realizing you continued to stare at all the people dancing. You look back up at him and blush, “You dancing with me?”

Billy laughs then, shaking his head, “I don’t really do that.”

“Then I’m perfectly happy right here,” you reply with a smile.

-

When you finally get back to the motel, you feel like as soon as you lay down on that couch you’ll be out. Mechanically, you dig through your suitcase for pajamas as Billy sits back on the bed and kicks his boots off.

He turns the TV and lights a cigarette, “Hand me a beer, will ya?”

You straighten up, cocking him an eyebrow and place your hand on your hip.

Billy’s oblivious for about five seconds but then he’s still not got a beer in his hand so he glances back to you and smirks. “You deaf?”

Then your jaw drops and you’ve got a fight the smile threatening to crack through.

He huffs when you don’t move and then pouts, “Pretty please.”

“There he is,” you grin and turn to the fridge, digging in it and retrieving a beer for him.

As his fingers wrap around it, he hums and looks up at you with a smile that reaches his eyes. He’s tipsy, it’s written all over his face in the cutest way.

You gather up the clothes you’d picked and excuse yourself to the bathroom to change and wash your face. You comb all of the snarls out of your hair and brush your teeth before exiting. Billy’s watching music videos, singing along around his cigarette. You saunter over to the couch, laying your head on the pillow and pulling the blanket over you. Billy stumps out his cigarette and turns the TV off, deciding it’s his turn to get ready for bed. Once he’s finished, he turns all the lights off and crawls into bed. Of course, you can’t sleep. This couch is lumpy and you keep tossing and turning.

After a beat, Billy softly calls out your name.

“Yeah?” you whisper back.

He sighs, “Get in the bed.”

No need to tell you twice, you shoot up from the couch, carrying the pillow with you. Under the covers are warm, heat always radiating from Billy. You hum happily, much more comfortable in the bed than on the couch. You remain on your side of the bed though, not wanting to push any boundaries. But then you feel Billy’s feet moving towards yours and he’s tangling your legs together. You open your eyes to see him looking back at you, the faint moonlight settling on his face.

“What did Steve think about us still going?” he whispers, his voice sounds like he’s nervous to use it.

You knit your brows together, “I don’t know. I didn’t ask him.”

“Ah,” Billy purses his lips. “Don’t you think he’d be uncomfortable with it?”

“Why would he?” you whisper, confused as to why he’s asking about Steve.

“His girlfriends in the same bed as her ex,” he explains softly.

You gasp at that, looking as you can see the sadness in his eyes. He thinks you’re with Steve. You place your hand on his jaw, “I’m not his girlfriend.”

“But—“

“I fucked up but I’m still in love with you. There’s no way I could be with anyone other than you. At least… not for like years or something,” you whisper.

Billy nods against your hand but then he sits up, “Why did you do it then?”

You lay on your back, figuring nows as good time as any to finally have this conversation. Before you speak again, you’ve got to collect the right words. You don’t want to word this the wrong way. If it even matters. Billy should not forgive you. The reason you did it was stupid and you couldn’t expect to be exonerated completely for it, ever.

“I… I got scared. When it seemed like intimacy turned you off. I freaked out,” you start, “It’s so stupid, I know, but it like fucking tanked my self esteem. I thought like maybe you weren’t attracted to me anymore and that’s why. So I guess I kind of just… accepted the next attention I got to try and feel better.”

Billy nods, surprising you as you expect him to judge you even more. “I’m still very much attracted to you,” he whispers, “I was scared something like this would happen so I uh, don’t like to get close.”

You feel tears welling up in your eyes and you sit up, looking at him and reaching for his hands, “I did exactly what you were scared of… I’m so sorry. I just…”

He shrugs, “I get the whole like… self esteem thing though. That’s why I called Stephanie. I wanted to feel better about myself.”

“And Stephanie would hurt me so it was like two birds with one stone,” you say, wiping your cheek and Billy laughs softly at that.

“Yeah, wanted it to hurt so bad.”

“I deserved it. You slept with her?” you ask. You figure you know the answer and it already fucking hurts but you want to give Billy the satisfaction of hurting you back some more. And you realize how fucking unhealthy that is.

“Yeah,” he mumbles.

You nod slowly, “We should get some sleep.”

Billy sighs, “I feel like this conversation should be longer.”

“We can continue it. I don’t know what else to say but if you have more to say to me, then by all means, please do.”

Billy lays back down, pulling you with him and again, you turn to face each other. “You really hurt me,” he whispers and you can see tears in his eyes. It stings. “I… I want to have what we had but I don’t know if he can.”

“It’ll be different for sure, but we can work at it,” you tell him. “If we both really want it.”

“Do you?”

“More than anything else,” you whisper and Billy nods.

Then you’re both silent, looking in each others eyes and Billy strokes your cheek before rolling over and facing away from you. Without a clue how, you manage to fall asleep.

---------------------------------

a/n: a reminder that my inbox is open and i would looooove requests!!! smutty, fluffy, angsty, whatever :)

Wicked Sensation

part thirteen // Billy Hargrove x f!reader

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven | part twelve | part thirteen

a/n: hey guys my inbox is open!!! please send requests ❤️

word count: 6.6k

warnings: 18+ minors dni, angst, drinking, sex mentioned, cheating mentioned

taglist(i love you all): @blue-eyed-lion @bbyhargrove @briefmongerfishzonk-blog @sweet-villain @actuallyspencerreid @trapistani @sierrahhh

Orange hues light up your room as your alarm blares. The clock reads 5:00 and you have to pull yourself from your sheets. Well you got three hours of sleep, that’s not too bad. Laying in bed by nine last night, you had the right idea but you’re thoughts swarmed excessively and no matter how hard you had tried, you couldn’t feel sleepy. Counting sheep, reading and being aware of your breathing had all failed. You were too nervous and excited to sleep. You knew you could sleep on the plane anyways.

You had thankfully packed all your bags and left them by the front door last night. The only thing you had to do before leaving was get dressed and brush your teeth. As you file through your dresser, your stomach feels like you’re about to drop on a roller coaster. Plane rides did make you nervous but what this trip could turn out to be made you more nervous. You were hoping this meant getting back together but you decided you’d let Billy make the first move and if he never did, then you’d accept that. You couldn’t imagine a world where you could be just be friends. You desired him too deeply, there was no way you’d be able to curb that feeling for him. You hear a knock at the door and your heart swells. He’s here. You quickly dress in comfortable clothes, a t-shirt and leggings with your Reeboks. You rush to brush your teeth, bouncing on your feet with excitement.

“Honey?” you hear your dad call out, “Billy’s here! You awake? We’ve got to get going soon.”

“Be right there!” you shout around your toothbrush.

After rinsing your mouth, you splash a bit of Jean Naté on your neck before you run out to the kitchen. Billy’s standing there, looking exhausted but still dressed in his 501’s.

“It’s like a five hour flight,” you remind Billy, “Are you gonna be comfortable in jeans?”

He smiles at you, “I wear these almost every day. I’ll be fine.”

Your dad interrupts the moment, “Alright, you kids ready to go?”

You both nod, Billy grabs onto your suitcase to lug it out and you fight the urge to kiss his cheek as you walk out to your dads station wagon.

“Did you wanna give me the keys to Camaro?” your dad asks Billy, “so I could go and start it every few days? Make sure it’s still alive when you get back?”

Billy laughs, a little surprised he hadn’t thought of it himself. He reaches into his pocket and hands your dad the keys.

“Please,” he says, “I mean hell, if you feel obligated to bring the baby into the shop for a tune up I wouldn’t be mad.”

The interaction has your stomach flipping and your heart swelling. You imagine one day being married to Billy and him getting along with your dad like this. You wanna climb into the back with Billy and sit in his lap the whole way to the airport. But you push everything down. You’d promised yourself you’d let him make the first move. This trip was between two friends. One of those friends desired the other carnally but hey, still friends. You could behave yourself.

You do feel like a married couple once you get to the airport and argue about how to spend the brief hour you have before the flight. And another argument about what to do during your layover. You can’t help but think that prior to the break up, you two would’ve spent the hour and a half layover fucking in some deserted bathroom. You’re a little hopeful that might still happen. But Billy passes out during the first flight.

You watch him, so entirely tempted to hold onto him in any way you can. You don’t, but you don’t stop yourself from admiring him while he sleeps. He looks so peaceful and everything about Billy makes your heart skip a beat. His nose, so cute and button like as he breathes through it. His eyes seem active under his eyelids, like he’s having an incredible dream. You wanna hear about every dream he’s ever had. You pine for him to tell you every thought he’s ever had, and you think maybe this breakup could actually make you two closer. You suddenly longed for him in such a different way.

As if on cue, you feel the deep stabbing of guilt in your chest and suddenly you feel like crying. You had tried your hardest to justify to yourself why you’d cheated on Billy but when it came down to it, you were really just being selfish. You were broken, you’d repeated your mother’s behaviors which made you feel worse because you had always been so mad at her for doing that to your family. And instead of ending things, your dad demanded more control of your mom, which just pushed her away. He screened her phone calls, read her mail and wouldn’t let her leave the house unless he went with. You think you expected Billy to do the same. That was also selfish of you. In fact, now, you couldn’t believe he was sitting next to you on this plane. You didn’t deserve that and you wanted to tell him as much but were scared to bring up the situation at all.

An hour or so passes and you succumb to sleep as well. When Billy wakes, your resting your head on his shoulder and sleeping soundly. He smiles to himself, but when you start to rouse, he jerks away and you look at him with sleepy eyes.

“Sorry,” you mumble, wiping the bit of drool on the corner of your mouth.

“It’s fine,” he replies, checking his watch to see how long you’ve both been asleep. He sighs, realizing there’s still an hour before the layover.

He thinks about what to talk to you about, the awkwardness between you is heavy and rather unbearable for him. Luckily, he doesn’t have to say anything because you’re reaching for your Walkman in your backpack. He peers over curiously as you rummage through the mess of cassettes you’ve brought. He chuckles when you decide on an INXS tape, he’d only heard whatever songs of theirs played on the radio and he’s impressed by your range of taste. You weren’t elitist about your music like most people were, like he was.

Billy’s never really flown before. One time when he was a boy but he barely remembered it. He had a slight fear that because the worst things always happened to him that the plane would malfunction and barrel down onto some random field in the middle of America. He reaches into his pocket for his smokes knowing the nicotine would calm him down. He nudges you, pointing to the armrest where the ashtray is hidden underneath your limb. You shoot him a cordial smile before crossing your arms to give him access. He even offers you a hit from the Marlboro but your stomach is already too upset, so you shake your head. You could wait until the layover. However, the second hand smoke gets to you and you have to close your eyes and focus on your breathing so you don’t throw up all over your lap. You end up falling asleep again.

Billy shakes your shoulder gently and you open your eyes to see him standing in the seat and you look out the window to see you’ve made it to Arizona. You grin, excited to stretch your legs. Billy’s ever the gentlemen, grabbing your carry on and lugging it around with his own. You find it immensely sweet, surprised that he would even look at you after what you’ve done. You couldn’t even look at yourself in the mirror.

“Are you hungry?” you ask, bringing your headphones from around your head to rest on your shoulders.

Billy shrugs, “I could eat something, I guess.”

Your stomach coils, wanting everything to go back to normal. You long for his laughter, for that light you used to see in him. You royally fucked it up, you took that light and doused it in water when you should’ve been fueling it.

You two settle into a fast food joint and after a moment of silence, you finally speak up, “I’m really sorry, Billy. I can’t even put it into words. I just… I know I really fucked up and I would fix it. I’d go back in time or I don’t know.”

Your face is hot and your voice echoing into your ears burns.

Billy just looks at you with furrowed brows, he goes to say something but seems to overthink it. With a sigh he tells you, “This isn’t when I want to have that conversation.”

“You’re right, I’m sorry, this trip is supposed to be fun,” you deflect, sinking in your chair as you stare at the meal he’d bought you, appetite vanished.

“No, we’re going to have that conversation soon. Just not in a fucking airport,” Billy says pointedly.

For some strange reason, the anger is his voice is completely welcomed by you. You think it means he cares, that he’s not completely too far past getting back together. The look on his face might say otherwise but you know him well enough, he’s here and he’s buying your lunch and he’s carrying your luggage. Billy shows it in small but meaningful ways.

Nodding, you pick up a few fries and force them down. “I wonder what car my dad rented us,” an attempt to change the subject, to make things lighthearted.

Billy grins then, eyes lighting up, “I know what I’d pick.”

You playfully roll your eyes before breaking into a giggle, imagining him driving some hot red convertible with a surfboard sticking out from the backseat. It’s such an easy image, you’re enamored with it. At least you did one thing right, you brought him home.

“I think maybe my dad picked a station wagon, like his,” you counter and Billy pulls an annoyed face.

“Your dad wouldn’t do that to me.”

He’s right, your dad loved Billy. He told you he missed him when he’d stopped coming around and you just broke down, explaining to your dad what you’d done and how sick you felt. He encouraged you to talk to Billy, but you got cold feet every time you tried. You wondered if your dad thought less of you, now.

Soon enough, Billy’s looking at his watch and then back up at you.

“Boarding time,” he sings out, standing up and stretching his arms. His shirt rides up and you’re blessed with the view of his blonde happy trail, causing a tightness inside of you that you hadn’t felt in a while. You quickly clear the table and follow Billy to the gate, watching as his curls bounce with his steps.

Arizona to San Diego is a nice short flight, you basically go up and then back down. The stewardess doesn’t even offer refreshments which sucks because your mouth is so dry from the anticipation. You regret not buying a bottle of water or something during the layover. You let Billy have the window seat for this flight, watching him carefully for when he sees the ocean. You want to see that light inside him ignite again. And it does, his eyes look the happiest you’ve ever seen, his cheeks swollen due to the smile. You reach your hand over and squeeze his bicep, leaning to look out the window with him.

“S’pretty,” you tell him, seeing his hometown for the first time.

The scattered skyscrapers amongst a sea of buildings is such a stark contrast to little ol’ Hawkins. It must have been so difficult for Billy to adjust to. You squeeze him again at the thought.

He’s up out of his seat as soon as the plane lands, looking you impatiently so you stand up too, stepping into the aisle. You attempt to grab the carry-ons but he doesn’t let you, speed walking down the aisle once he has them. You try to keep up, following him to baggage claim where he bounces on his feet while his eyes dart around for your suitcases. He’s pushing through people once he finds them, heads turning at him as he does so.

You grab your suitcase from him, trailing it behind you as you walk towards the shuttles. You recite the company your dad told you over and over in your head, pointing to their shuttle as it pulls up. You pack into the bus, standing so close to Billy you can feel his breath on your face. It’s minty and warm and so intoxicating.

As you trail up to the counter, you pull out the papers your dad gave you. Sliding them across the counter, you smile at the girl. She lifts them up and gives you an incredulous look.

“You don’t look like a Billy Hargrove,” she says and Billy steps up behind you.

“That’s because I am,” he says, pulling out his wallet.

He hands her his ID with a wink and her entire demeanor changes, fluttering her eyelashes and suddenly all smiles. You fight your eyeballs as they try to roll.

“Enjoy your Corvette, Mr. Hargrove,” she says as she hands the keys over.

“Corvette?” he cocks an eyebrow at you, seeing that you’re just as stunned as he is.

The two of you follow her directions in the parking lot, walking up to a bright red convertible. You both gawk at it, you’re trying to figure out how your father as paid for it when Billy lets out a loud, happy laugh.

“I could kiss your dad,” he says, his tone excitedly shifting.

You scoff, “Please, don’t.”

But you smile. You wished you had a video camera to record this moment for your dad. You help him load your luggage into the small trunk, playing Tetris with the suitcase and backpacks. When he gets into the front seat, he starts feeling the dash with his hands and shaking his head as he laughs.

“Would you like to be alone with her?” you tease, tossing your head back to look at him.

He laughs again at your joke, “Maybe. No, I want you to watch.”

“Kinky,” you throw back, raising your eye brows.

He slides the keys into the ignition and rubs the dash, “Come on, baby. Purr for me.”

That’s it. You’re turned on by a man talking dirty to a car. Awesome.

He turns the ignition, bringing the engine to life and surprising you both as a Men At Work song blasts loudly through the speakers making you both jump. Billy’s hand quickly turns the dial, mumbling as he does so, “Well that ruined the moment.”

“Aw, you don’t like Men At Work?” you ask, mocking disappointment as you grab your bag full of cassettes.

“No,” he says, pressing the eject button but the cassette doesn’t pop out. “Oh, fuck no, please no.”

You turn to look, a devious smile spreading over your face, “Looks like you’re going to after this vacation.”

Billy shakes his head in disgust, repeatedly slamming the button with his finger before giving up with a sigh and hitting the AM/FM button. He scans through the stations until he finds his favorite station and the disc jockey’s voice fills him with nostalgia.

“So we headed to the beach now?” he asks with hopeful eyes.

You shake your head, “I gotta wash the plane off me first. Then beach.”

He chuckles, putting the car into gear and driving out of the parking lot. “Where are we staying?” he asks and you pull out the paperwork, scanning over it to find the motels name.

“Uh… Sunset Motel,” you start to rattle the address and Billy’s reciting it in sync with you. “Been there before?”

“Once or twice,” he smirks.

You wince as you feel a slight twinge of jealousy, “Oh, god, you didn’t lose your virginity there did you?”

Billy laughs and looks over at you, “No, no. I took a couple there.”

“I don’t know if that’s worse. Where did you lose it?” you ask, genuinely curious.

He scratches the side of his nose and smiles, “Summer Camp.”

You nod, frowning in amusement, “Stereotypical. I like it.”

Billy asks, “What about you?” but he’s not exactly sure he wants to know the answer.

You purse your lips, it was an embarrassing story. At least to you. “It was at a party. I was a sophomore and I just wanted to get it over with.”

Billy nods, though he looks sad. You were sad about it too, though. When you looked back, you wished you’d waited. A part of you actually wished you saved it for Billy but you had no idea he existed before October. Which was a weird thought, since now you were so enthralled with him. You weren’t sure how you functioned before him.

“I worked there for a couple months,” he points, turning your attention to a mechanic shop. “Before we had to move.”

You smile, imaging him fixing up cars with oil smeared all over his face and clothes, “Did you have a uniform with your name on it?”

“Sure did. I still do,” he replies and you raise your eyebrows.

“Why didn’t you try working for my dad?” you ask, realizing maybe there was a whole side of Billy you didn’t know.

He shrugs then, “I don’t know. Missed the water so the pool seemed like fun. Besides, all I really did there was oil changes and like basic repairs.”

“Pool will be closed when we get back… I know he’d hire you in a heartbeat. If you want, that is,” you suggest, eyes trained on the blonde behind the wheel, trying to read his expression.

He glances to you, “Might have to take you up on that. I’m actually gonna need a job, I’m expecting my shit to be all packed up when I get back.”

“What? Why?” you ask, looking at him quizzically.

Billy scrunches his nose up before he speaks, “Dad’s kicking me out. Gave me two weeks to find a place and well, this is week two.”

You gasp then, “Why is he kicking you out?”

Billy gestures around, “Think it had to do with coming here.”

You feel guilty again. You just kept fucking his life up for selfish reasons. “I’m sorry,” you apologize and he shakes his head.

“I feel so…” he thinks for a beat, “relieved to be back here. I’d skip the flight back if my car wasn’t there.”

A smile tugs the corners of your lips up, thinking about staying here with him. If he’d let you.

-

Billy stands behind you as you unlock the door, all the luggage in his arms and hands. You again tried to help but he wouldn’t let you. He sees the single queen size mattress in the room and bites his lip. Well, shit, he thinks.

“This is the only room I could afford for three weeks,” you inform him, “I’ll sleep on the couch.”

Billy nods, following you into the room. He tosses your backpacks down on the bed and places his hands on his hips, looking around the room. You drag your huge suitcase over and lift it onto the bed, unzipping it and digging through the mess of clothes. You pull out what you plan to change into, grabbing your bag of toiletries along with them.

“I’ll be quick,” you say, walking to the bathroom and shutting the door behind you.

The shower feels great, considering the humidity here was thicker than at home. You shave your legs so you’re not quite as quick as you’d promised. But Billy’s lounged on the bed, just waiting, when you emerge from the bathroom.

He jumps up, “Let’s go.”

You giggle, reaching for your bag and sliding your shoes on, “Alright, alright.”

The drive is short, you’d made sure to book a motel close to a beach. You think the two of you could’ve even walked, but Billy seems excited to drive the car again. He pulls into a nearly empty parking lot and you watch as his eyes glaze, taking in the ocean this close in nine months. You can feel the euphoria radiating from him.

Since it’s rather late, it’s too cold to swim. Plus, Billy told you the ocean on this coast isn’t warm like it is in Florida. You two walk along the shore, holding your shoes in your hands. You stop and look out at the ocean, then to Billy.

“Go stand in it,” you tell him, nudging his shoulder with yours.

He looks back at you, “Come with me.”

You’d follow him anywhere. Kneeling down, you roll up his jeans for him. The two of you walk up to the tide, the temperature covers your skin in goosebumps but you feel relaxed. You watch as the waves form and crash down and you itch to reach over and lace your fingers with Billy’s. You don’t, you give him this moment to gaze at the ocean, to feel at home.

It’s starting to get dark, you’re not sure how long you’ve been standing there but you put the ball in Billy’s court, even though your stomach is screaming for some sustenance. Like he can read your mind, he sighs and looks over to you.

“Let’s get some dinner,” he offers to which you nod.

“Can we get something we can take back? Or something quick? I’m tired, the time zone change kinda messed me up, I’m sorry,” you reply, shyly.

Billy laughs then, “Just means we’ll wake bright and early. Best time to surf.”

-

You’re lying on the couch, unable to sleep. Tossing and turning, glancing up to the clock on the nightstand to gauge just how many hours have passed. So much for being tired.

You think you can hear Billy’s steady breathing, indicating he’s passed out. It’s not even late, so you try not to feel bad. Lights were turned off by nine but it’s nearing midnight. You tell yourself its because the couch is so uncomfortable but deep down you know you can’t sleep so close to Billy without being close enough to feel him.

After some thought, you sit up. You search in the dark for the robe you’d brought and your slippers. Digging in your purse, you find your pack of cigarettes and slip out the door, but not before grabbing a beer from the mini fridge. You sit on the white, plastic chair next to the door and light up the Marlboro. The smoke fills your lung and you relax instantly. Cracking open the beer, you look out at the parking lot illuminated by the Motel’s neon sign. Everything about this place is so pretty and so Billy. You imagine what he’ll smell like after being in the water, salty and musky. You close your eyes, pretending like things aren’t different, like you can go back into the room and cuddle up to him, flowering him with kisses and whispers of love.

The door opens, startling your eyes open and you let out a surprised yelp, clutching your chest as you turn to see a sleepy Billy— eyes puffy and hair wild from sleep.

“Oh my god, you scared me,” you say breathlessly.

Billy rubs his eyes, “What are you doing?”

“Couldn’t sleep. I didn’t mean to wake you up,” you answer apologetically.

He takes the seat next to yours, donned only in boxers and a white tank top. And his gold necklace but you’ve never seen him without it on. He grabs the can of beer, guzzling half of it down easily before snatching the pack of smokes without asking if he can have one.

“It’s peaceful out here,” you note softly.

He just hums as he sucks down the cigarette, eyes wandering to the ocean. He seems deep in thought and as pretty as this place is, he’s a better view and you can’t look away from him. You wonder what he’s thinking.

“There’s a rental place down the road. I bought my first board there when I was twelve,” he says and you swear he’s got some magic power to read your mind. “We’ll go there in the morning to get the gear.”

“Sounds good,” you reply nonchalantly, reaching for the beer and sipping it.

When you get back inside, he collapses on the bed and you venture back over the couch. He doesn’t say anything and eventually, you fall asleep. Though it’s a restless sleep and when the alarm starts blaring, you feel as if you had just closed your eyes. Billy slams the alarm off and shuffles around the room, getting dressed in the dark and crouching down beside you.

“Hey,” he whispers, gently shaking you.

“Hmm,” you whine.

Billy whispers again, “Time to get up.”

You turn over, “Why don’t you go without me? I’ll go tomorrow morning, I promise. I barely got any sleep.”

He chuckles softly, “Okay, princess.. er, fuck. Okay.”

You blush at the pet name, sleepily reaching over to stroke his cheek. “Is that okay? That you go alone?”

He nods, you can feel it against your palm, “I think I might need to do it alone first. Make sure I didn’t forget how and make a fool out of myself.”

“Oh, whatever,” you giggle as he pulls away.

Once he shuts the door behind him, you find the tank top he was wearing the night before and crawl into the bed with it, bringing it up to your chest and fall asleep to have the best sleep you’ve had in weeks.

Billy’s back before noon, waking you up when he unlocks the door. You sit up slowly, watching as Billy tries to juggle two surfboards and a duffel bag. You look at him curiously, one is smaller than the other and it’s hot pink.

“Isn’t she purty?” he asks, hands on his hips as he leans the boards against the wall with a giant smile.

Leaning forward on your elbows and resting your chin on your palm, you ask, “Is the pink one yours?”

“No!” he rolls his eyes, “I’m a little too advanced for that board, thank you very much.”

You giggle and look up at him. His hairs wet and you can smell the ocean on him from here. “How was it?”

Sauntering over, he drops the duffel bag in front of you, “Like I did it yesterday. So peaceful… so fun.” His smile gets even bigger as he unzips the bag and hands you a wetsuit. “I think this will fit.”

You grab the material as you sit back up, holding it out to look at it. “It should. What else are we doing today?”

Billy walks over to his suitcase, flipping it open and grabbing a change of clothes and his toiletries. “I’m gonna show you around town, there’s a spot I want to take you for lunch and a bar we can go to tonight,” he stands in the doorway of the bathroom.

“Alright,” you smile up at the blonde, “How should I dress?”

He shrugs, “However your little heart desires. No dress code anywhere.” He winks and closes the door, you can hear him start up the shower. You turn the radio on the alarm clock, turning it up as loud as it goes before you make yourself a pot of coffee, knowing you have enough time to have at least one cup because Billy’s got to style his hair.

Lighting a cigarette, you pour in the little creamer packet into your coffee and think about what clothes you brought. You two really oughta unpack or this room will be a disaster before the weeks over.

After getting dressed, you place your jewelry case on the nightstand and open it. Your fingers ritualistically pull out the necklace Billy gave you but you sigh, you can’t wear it but you tell yourself one of these days you’ll just put it on and see what he says. If he says anything. You still don the dagger earring everyday. Many attempts to take it out but you can’t bring yourself to do it. You worried he wanted it back but he’s seemed to replace it with something similar already.

A Great White song comes on the radio as you’re doing your hair in the mirror above the bed, which has proven to be a difficult task. You wobble around and almost lose your balance every time you lean one way or the other. When Billy emerges from the bathroom, you’re swinging your hips along to song as you tease up your hair and it makes you lose what little balance you had. You launch off the bed but you feel big, strong hands catch your arms and lift you to your feet.

You look up at him, cheeks red and an embarrassed smile. He smiles back at you, “Clumsy girl.”

A familiar sensation climbs up your body, the way he looks at you makes your head swim and you actually feel like you two might kiss. You’re just looking at each other, his hands still gripping your arms and your breath gets caught in your throat. Then Billy pulls away, walks to the coffee pot and pours himself a cup. Disappointment settles into your stomach.

“Will this outfit be okay?” you ask, gesturing to it while he turns to look at you. You worried the pleather leggings might be too hot but you’ve paired it with a tiny shirt you’d turned into a tank top so you figure it evens out. You see as Billy swallows the lump in his throat before he just nods, turning his attention back to the coffee. You think you won, whatever game you’re playing.

-

The bar is loud and you’re exhausted from the heat of the day. The leggings were a bad choice but you could feel Billy’s eyes on your ass anytime he was behind you so were they really?

It’s apparent that Billy frequented this place before the move, the bouncer was excited to see him and didn’t bother to ID either of you. They chitchat for a while before Billy guides you inside. It’s dark but there’s bright neon lights scattering across the ceiling and walls. It wasn’t like The Hideout at all, which is the only bar you’ve been to. People in California are much prettier than in Indiana and you feel insecure, eyes scanning over the blondes with big hair and tight skirts. Billy places his hand on your back, ushering you to the bar.

He waits patiently for the girl working to turn around, a big smirk on his face. When she does, her face opens up with shock.

“Billy fucking Hargrove! What the hell are you doing here?” she screams over the music excitedly. She hops up onto the bar and over it to hug him tightly. You awkwardly stand next to them, watching as the hug lasts longer than your comfortable with.

“Did you move back?” she asks before glaring daggers at the patrons complaining about her not doing her job.

Billy shakes his head, smirk still plastered on his face, “No, my girl,” he motions to you and it makes your heart skip, “surprised me with a little vacation back home. I’m here for three weeks.”

His girl? Was it that easy? Were you his girl again? You have a million questions but you just smile as the bartender turns to you.

“How sweet!” she reaches over and hugs you, holding onto your elbows when she pulls away, “Nice to meet you! I’m Jennifer.”

You tell her name, blushing as you do so because you’re voice isn’t loud enough over the music and she asks for it again. You blame it on the shock from Billy calling you his girl, you’re usually the loudest person in the room.

“Well, let me get you to the house special,” she says before climbing back over the bar and turning to pour two shots of Jameson and slide over two cans of PBR. You now realize why when you’d ordered that at The Hideout he said you were his kind of lady.

“To home,” Billy cheers his shot with you once you sit on the stools.

You down the shots and you wince a little, but Billy’s smile doesn’t leave his face. Him and Jennifer talk for a bit while she’s busy pouring shots for other people and you look around the bar again, watching girls dance with guys and wonder if Billy used to dance with them. Overall, you wonder what he did here. Was it all surfing and hanging out at this bar? He’d hinted in the past that it was his fault that they’d moved across the country. Something about Susan not liking his lifestyle and thinking it was a bad influence on Max. You’re sure Neil probably wasn’t too stoked on it either. It seemed like maybe he had less control over Billy out here. So many places to be while in Hawkins, everyone knew everyone and there was really no where to go and nothing to do.

Billy leans into your ear and whispers, “You can go dance if you want to.”

You’d been zoning out everything around you while you were thinking, not realizing you continued to stare at all the people dancing. You look back up at him and blush, “You dancing with me?”

Billy laughs then, shaking his head, “I don’t really do that.”

“Then I’m perfectly happy right here,” you reply with a smile.

-

When you finally get back to the motel, you feel like as soon as you lay down on that couch you’ll be out. Mechanically, you dig through your suitcase for pajamas as Billy sits back on the bed and kicks his boots off.

He turns the TV and lights a cigarette, “Hand me a beer, will ya?”

You straighten up, cocking him an eyebrow and place your hand on your hip.

Billy’s oblivious for about five seconds but then he’s still not got a beer in his hand so he glances back to you and smirks. “You deaf?”

Then your jaw drops and you’ve got a fight the smile threatening to crack through.

He huffs when you don’t move and then pouts, “Pretty please.”

“There he is,” you grin and turn to the fridge, digging in it and retrieving a beer for him.

As his fingers wrap around it, he hums and looks up at you with a smile that reaches his eyes. He’s tipsy, it’s written all over his face in the cutest way.

You gather up the clothes you’d picked and excuse yourself to the bathroom to change and wash your face. You comb all of the snarls out of your hair and brush your teeth before exiting. Billy’s watching music videos, singing along around his cigarette. You saunter over to the couch, laying your head on the pillow and pulling the blanket over you. Billy stumps out his cigarette and turns the TV off, deciding it’s his turn to get ready for bed. Once he’s finished, he turns all the lights off and crawls into bed. Of course, you can’t sleep. This couch is lumpy and you keep tossing and turning.

After a beat, Billy softly calls out your name.

“Yeah?” you whisper back.

He sighs, “Get in the bed.”

No need to tell you twice, you shoot up from the couch, carrying the pillow with you. Under the covers are warm, heat always radiating from Billy. You hum happily, much more comfortable in the bed than on the couch. You remain on your side of the bed though, not wanting to push any boundaries. But then you feel Billy’s feet moving towards yours and he’s tangling your legs together. You open your eyes to see him looking back at you, the faint moonlight settling on his face.

“What did Steve think about us still going?” he whispers, his voice sounds like he’s nervous to use it.

You knit your brows together, “I don’t know. I didn’t ask him.”

“Ah,” Billy purses his lips. “Don’t you think he’d be uncomfortable with it?”

“Why would he?” you whisper, confused as to why he’s asking about Steve.

“His girlfriends in the same bed as her ex,” he explains softly.

You gasp at that, looking as you can see the sadness in his eyes. He thinks you’re with Steve. You place your hand on his jaw, “I’m not his girlfriend.”

“But—“

“I fucked up but I’m still in love with you. There’s no way I could be with anyone other than you. At least… not for like years or something,” you whisper.

Billy nods against your hand but then he sits up, “Why did you do it then?”

You lay on your back, figuring nows as good time as any to finally have this conversation. Before you speak again, you’ve got to collect the right words. You don’t want to word this the wrong way. If it even matters. Billy should not forgive you. The reason you did it was stupid and you couldn’t expect to be exonerated completely for it, ever.

“I… I got scared. When it seemed like intimacy turned you off. I freaked out,” you start, “It’s so stupid, I know, but it like fucking tanked my self esteem. I thought like maybe you weren’t attracted to me anymore and that’s why. So I guess I kind of just… accepted the next attention I got to try and feel better.”

Billy nods, surprising you as you expect him to judge you even more. “I’m still very much attracted to you,” he whispers, “I was scared something like this would happen so I uh, don’t like to get close.”

You feel tears welling up in your eyes and you sit up, looking at him and reaching for his hands, “I did exactly what you were scared of… I’m so sorry. I just…”

He shrugs, “I get the whole like… self esteem thing though. That’s why I called Stephanie. I wanted to feel better about myself.”

“And Stephanie would hurt me so it was like two birds with one stone,” you say, wiping your cheek and Billy laughs softly at that.

“Yeah, wanted it to hurt so bad.”

“I deserved it. You slept with her?” you ask. You figure you know the answer and it already fucking hurts but you want to give Billy the satisfaction of hurting you back some more. And you realize how fucking unhealthy that is.

“Yeah,” he mumbles.

You nod slowly, “We should get some sleep.”

Billy sighs, “I feel like this conversation should be longer.”

“We can continue it. I don’t know what else to say but if you have more to say to me, then by all means, please do.”

Billy lays back down, pulling you with him and again, you turn to face each other. “You really hurt me,” he whispers and you can see tears in his eyes. It stings. “I… I want to have what we had but I don’t know if he can.”

“It’ll be different for sure, but we can work at it,” you tell him. “If we both really want it.”

“Do you?”

“More than anything else,” you whisper and Billy nods.

Then you’re both silent, looking in each others eyes and Billy strokes your cheek before rolling over and facing away from you. Without a clue how, you manage to fall asleep.

---------------------------------

a/n: a reminder that my inbox is open and i would looooove requests!!! smutty, fluffy, angsty, whatever :)

This will probably be an odd ask/idea

But I've had a thought. Imagine billy x fem reader who has a seriously religious mother and billy accidentally gets reader pregnant. They aren't in a relationship or anything, just a one night stand.

So readers mom finds out and she drags reader all the way to Billy's house and demands to talk to Neil. At this point billy doesn't know, you just found out you were pregnant. And he's watching your mom scream and yell and demand billy marries you because she doesn't want her daughter to be a wh*re.

Anyways imagine if billy didn't care, not one bit. He thinks you're really pretty anyways and figures he would've likely never settled down (he probably has serious anxiety that nobody will like who he truly is, feels like they would've abandoned him like his mom)

And he's forced to get an apartment with you, so now you're both married with a baby on the way and your own apartment (thankfully your family has money to spare and your dad isn't as serious as your mom is, he's probably sending you a little extra each month) Billy's sleeping on the couch every night, you two haven't taken your so called marriage seriously.

And its still like that when the baby is born (its a girl!) And you've decided to name her Jude because reader had the Beatles song stuck in her head her entire pregnancy.

And you're laying there in the hospital bed alone, your baby is in the nursery with all the other newborns, and you feel billy slide in behind you. He's cuddling you from behind (imagine the ending scene of Juno when she had her baby) and you both fall asleep feeling perfectly content with your life. Even though you never intended to get pregnant or marry billy, you can't help but feel complete

(Sorry this is long)

So angsty but sweet! I hope this tickles your fancy!!

The collage of crosses on the wall remind you of what a charlatan you are. Your vision blurs the longer you look at them, listening to your mother screaming about how you’re going to hell for having premarital sex and with the Hargrove boy no less.

It was a simple checkup, you hadn’t been feeling well and it was supposed to be an easy checkup but your mom insists they test you every time you go to the doctor. She’s been doing it since you got your period. You didn’t expect it to come back positive but then again, when you’d hooked up with Billy, he was so pretty and charming you couldn’t bring yourself to insist he use protection.

He never called and you stopped showing up at the pool. A night to be forgotten about. Unfortunately, God apparently decided to punish you. Your mother tells you as much on the drive over to Billy’s house. When she bangs on the door, you’re standing meekly behind her, unable to meet the blonde’s eyes as he opens up.

“You,” your mother seethes when she sees him. “I need to talk to your father. Now.”

He obeys and your mother drags you inside without an invite, already screaming. Billy stands with his arms crossed with his dad, the both of them equally looking confused as your mom babbles on about angry she is. Then she motions to Billy, “He’s knocked up my daughter! He’s ruined her for any good man.”

Billy’s face drops, finding out the news like this probably not the best way. You tear your eyes away from his, staring down at a stain in the carpet, wondering what caused it.

Neil’s now screaming at Billy and two domineering voices echoing throughout the house is unfortunately a sound you’re used to. And it seems as if Billy is too, but when he’s forced to apologize to your mother you find it odd, eyes darting back up to him.

“They have to get married. She’s not going to be an unwed mother. She’s not going to be a whore,” your mom insists and you’re genuinely shocked when Billy doesn’t protest.

-

Sharing an apartment with your “husband” is awkward at best. He doesn’t sleep in the bed. You wonder if maybe this was just an easy escape from his apparent shitty home life. It was for you. There’s no yelling anymore. It just feels empty. The bed is empty. Just you, and you know your husband should be in here with you. It hurts that he’s not. You don’t know Billy but you do like him. You like looking at him, you like the polite conversations you have when you have dinner or watch TV together, and you want so desperately for him to come crawl into bed with you and suddenly confess he’s madly in love with you and he’s so happy to be the father of your baby and your husband. But he won’t and he doesn’t.

The ring on your finger doesn’t make you feel married but you are. You have been for almost nine months now. You’re so pregnant you look like you might pop.

As you attempt to sleep, like clockwork, Hey Jude gets stuck in your head. It does almost every night. It is a song that brings you joy so perhaps that’s why. A little lullaby to lull you to sleep. You sing it out to yourself, quietly. Over and over until sleep comes.

Remember to let her into your heart, then you can start to make it better

-

Labor is a long twelve hours and Billy isn’t in the room. Your mother complains profusely about it but you’re not surprised. You didn’t even call him at work when your water broke, but when your mother found out he didn’t know, she called him.

Still, he doesn’t come.

The nurse hands a clean newborn girl to you and your heart melts at the sight of her. Curly blonde hair, blue eyes and a button nose like daddy. Some of you is in there too, not as clearly but it’s there. She looks up at you with big eyes and a wrinkly face and you kiss her forehead.

“Hey, Jude,” you sing to her, naming her after the song that cradled you to sleep every night.

She’s so beautiful and pure.

It’s not until everyone’s left and they’ve tucked Jude away in the newborns room that Billy opens the door. You sigh, turning over and closing your eyes.

Then warmth. He’s getting in the hospital bed with you, chest pressed tightly against your back and an arm wrapping around your waist. It’s the closest you two have been in these long nine months and you don’t realize just how deeply you wanted it.

When he presses a kiss to the back of your neck, you feel hot tears staining your cheeks and everything feels wonderful all of sudden. It feels whole. Complete.

You fall asleep cuddled up like that. Billy clinging onto you and you know he’ll feel the same way when he sees Jude.

Wicked Sensation

part seventeen // billy hargrove x f!reader

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven | part twelve | part thirteen | part fourteen | part fifteen | part sixteen | part seventeen

a/n: I’m going through a bit of family stuff but writing is my outlet so i don’t think it should be affected but to play it safe, this is going to be the hardest week of my life and I might get to requests slowly and post chapters slowly but maybe I’ll post more who knows. Anyways, thank you all so much for reading. I appreciate you all endlessly.

word count: 6k

warnings: 18+ minors dni, hey Eddie still exists!, Neil being Neil, pregnancy, smut, oral (m receiving), p in v

tag list: @blue-eyed-lion @bbyhargrove @sweet-villain @actuallyspencerreid @trapistani @sierrahhh @likeanimagepassingby2

Okay, so maybe it’s a bit ridiculous. The man has put a baby in you and is moving in to your parents house, you shouldn’t have to devise a plan to get him to propose to you. You never even pictured yourself in this role before but with all the pregnancy hormones and the devotion you feel towards Billy, the prospect of being his wife and the mother of his kids is insanely appealing. Perhaps this was all Mary’s fault. She’d put the idea in your head and now it was all you could think about.

That’s how you’re awake at the ass crack of dawn with her, making a lunch for Billy to take to his first day at your dads shop. You think that maybe if you start doing wife type things, Billy will realize how badly he wants to marry you.

“You wake up this early every morning?” you ask, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.

Mary smiles wide as she pours you a cup of coffee, “How do you think I get anything done?”

“There’s like more than 12 hours left of today, that seems like too much time,” you complain as you hear footsteps down the hall.

You turn to see a sleepy, messy haired Billy with an unlit cigarette perched between his lips already. That same familiar feeling warming your chest and making you swoon whenever you see him. He walks into the kitchen, pulling the cigarette from his mouth to lean down and peck your cheek.

“Morning,” he grumbles to Mary and reaches for the coffee pot.

“Oh, here!” you cheer, extending out the cup Mary had just poured for you.

Billy takes it, smiling at you, “Thanks, darlin. Care to join me?”

“You haven’t quit smoking?” Mary gives you a look of shock.

Shamefully, you shake your head. You were going to schedule an appointment today for the doctors and figured you’d ask him about your options for that. You’d been smoking since you were thirteen and weren’t sure if you could quit and Billy wasn’t going to anytime soon so you’d always have the temptation.

“They’re Lights,” Billy offers, “It’s something.”

Again, your heart swells. It’s a small thing but you love how he defends you at any opportunity. Mary gives you both a disappointed look as you follow Billy out to the backyard. He lights the cigarette and takes a long drag before handing it to you.

“We can share,” he says, “At least you’re cutting back.”

You nod and lean your shoulder into his, “Thank you. I feel like you’re the only person who gets me.”

He kisses your temple but doesn’t say anything. You’d like to think you’re the only person who gets him. Billy’s still not good at talking about his feelings. He shows you how he feels through touch, and maybe that’s enough. For now, at least. If you’re gonna start a family with him, you’d like that to change.

He takes another long drag from the cigarette and speaks up, “I’ve got to get my things today. If there is anything left. You willing to make that trip with me when I get back?”

You think that means he feels safe with you. With a soft smile, you tell him yes. You know you two have to tell Neil that you’re pregnant, or at least, you think you should. See, Billy hadn’t told you about his dad finding the Polaroids of you and you still thought that Neil liked you, so you think maybe he’ll be excited that you’re pregnant. Billy knows better and is dreading telling his dad. In fact, he doesn’t really want to tell him, doesn’t want Neil to be a grandfather at all. He knows Neil will try to control his kid since he can no longer control Billy.

“Are you excited to work for my dad?” you ask.

Billy nods, he genuinely is. He likes working on cars, figures it’ll pay enough for you guys to find an apartment in a few months. He is thinking about marriage, but he’s afraid of it. Having a child together isn’t enough to make sure either of you stay, he’s learned that. He’s also worried you might run off into another man’s arms at the first sign of trouble. It’s a fear he can’t shake.

“Yeah. You looking for jobs today?” he asks as he stumps the cigarette out in the ashtray.

Sighing, you shrug. You hadn’t planned for that but you know you should. Billy shouldn’t have to have all the financial responsibility but you had no idea what you would do. Working at your dads shop could easily turn into a career but you didn’t have that luxury. Your options were limited with only being able to work until the baby was born.

“I suppose I should,” you tell him as he stands and helps you up.

-

You pick up the phone and dial a number you’ve had memorized since grade school but you don’t remember the last time you called it.

“Hello?” Eddie’s voice rings through.

“Hi,” you say meekly.

Eddie scoffs, “You remembered I exist.”

You lay on your mattress, looking up at the ceiling as guilt drips into your system. Billy kept you so distracted from everyone and then when you were broken up shortly, Steve took up most your time. Eddie wasn’t supportive of you and Billy and selfishly, you decided Billy was most important. He still was, even more so now that you were carrying his child but you and Eddie had so much history that it would be cruel to never talk to him again.

“I’m sorry… I haven’t been fair to you,” you say softly.

“I expected you to call when I heard Billy dumped your ass but you never did,” Eddie replies, “Guess you couldn’t bear to hear an ‘I told you so’.”

“We got back together,” you mumble, “But I should’ve called. I don’t want to have to chose between the two of you.”

“Then don’t.”

“Eddie, you’re the one who made me feel like I had to in the first place,” you explain, “Billy has no issues with you.”

He’s silent and your skin crawls. You didn’t want to lose him but you understood if Eddie wanted nothing to do with you.

“I just don’t want to have to deal with it,” he says finally, “If you guys are constantly breaking up and getting back together, I’m never gonna come around to the idea of him.”

“I don’t see that happening,” you reveal, “He’s moving in and I’m pregnant, so…”

“You’re what?” Eddie’s voice sounds shocked.

“Yeah. I’m having Billy Hargrove’s baby.”

“Jesus Christ,” he exhaled, “I tell you what, I didn’t see that one happening.”

“Yeah, we didn’t either,” you chuckle.

“And he didn’t run away? He’s moving in with you? Are you guys engaged or something?”

“No! Well, not yet. I don’t know if he wants to get married,” you admit, shyly.

Eddie laughs, “He’s moving in with you and you guys are having a baby. Why the hell would he skip marrying you?”

“I don’t know. Marriage is like a big deal, a big commitment,” you say and Eddie’s laughing harder, you picture him doubling over from it.

“Why are you laughing?” you pout, feeling like you’re missing out on some joke.

Once his breathing calms down, he starts, “He’s all fine and dandy knocking you up and you’re scared he can’t commit.”

Eddie starts laughing again and you really don’t see why it’s hard to believe. You and Billy both know that kids and marriage don’t keep people together. Eddie should know that too, but here he is laughing hysterically.

“It’s not funny,” you whine and finally, he sighs.

“You’re right,” he deadpans, “it’s stupid. So I have Hellfire tonight but if you’re not busy later this week, we should hang out.”

“Can I bring Billy?” you ask, twirling the phone chord around your finger.

Another sigh and he says, “Yeah… guess I should get to know him if he’s gonna be the dad of my god child.”

You’re heart swells, but you deep down knew Eddie would forgive you. You guys were practically family.

-

Dale holds out the light blue uniform shirt to Billy, tells him they can get him an embroidered patch soon and Billy thanks him. Having a name on the shirt was a privilege at the shop in San Diego and Billy never earned it. At your dads shop, it was something everyone typically got from the first day. He wanted his employees to feel important, like they belonged on a team.

Billy pulls the shirt over his white tank top and starts buttoning it up, eyes scanning over your dads office. It’s in disarray. Tools, papers and empty paper coffee cups placed sporadically. On his desk, is a photo of you and your brother. Billy picks it up and looks closer. He suspects it’s from a past trip to Florida because your hair is shorter.

“You’ll have to come out with us from now on,” Dale says.

“What? Sorry,” he places the frame back on the desk.

“Florida. For Christmas, you’ll have to come with us,” your dad explains and Billy feels weird but not in a bad way. Christmas wasn’t ever a special holiday since his mom left. In fact, they didn’t really even celebrate it before his dad met Susan. The only thing he’d looked forward to was a card from his grandparents. However, you talked about Christmas excitedly, you’d told Billy it was your third favorite; after Halloween and Thanksgiving of course. It must be that it was fun in Florida, that holidays with your family weren’t as empty or angry as the ones Billy was used to.

“Yeah,” he says, smiling at the thought, “Wonder what the surfs like down there.”

Your dad laughs, “The waters a lot choppier than California but I imagine you’ll have fun.” He gestures to the door, “Let me give you a tour, real quick.”

Billy listens closely as your dad explains the routine of the shop and what Billy’s primary responsibilities will be before sending him in with Darla from accounting and Billy recognizes the name when your dad says it. He walks into the little office and is met with a member of his fan club, one of the housewives that would hang out around the pool.

“Billy!” she smiles wide, “What are you doing here?”

“Oh, hi,” he says as he walks up to her desk.

She keeps looking over Billy’s shoulder, causing him to turn and look.

“Oh, don’t worry,” she says, “We’re alone.”

He looks back at her with his brows furrowed. Alone? he thinks and his eyes dart down to the worn romance novel sitting on her desk. She stands and he shakes his head, “Oh, no.”

“No?” she looks disappointed.

Billy chuckles, “Dale just hired me, he sent me in here so I could fill out paperwork.”

Her disappointment evolves back into excitement, “You’re working here now?”

“Yep!” he chirps as he sits at the plastic chair across from her desk. “Saving for the baby and all.”

“Baby?” she asks and Billy revels in the defeated tone.

“Yeah, that’s why Dale’s giving me the job. His daughter and I are having a baby,” he puts his elbow on his knees and leans forward.

“Congratulations,” she says as she slams a clipboard on the desk. “Just fill this out quickly and I’ll have you in the books.”

“Awesome,” he grabs it, “Thanks.”

-

Billy takes the long way home, chain-smoking and listening to an entire cassette even though it’s typically a fifteen minute drive from the shop to home. He just needs to clear his head and his favorite way to do so is to take the road that stretches all around Hawkins and back. It’s mostly fields and farms, but it’ll take him right where he’s needs to go and he likes that it’s empty roads. He figures his alone time will be limited from here on out.

When he finally gets home, you’re voicing concerns. They’re in the form of questions, he knows you were worried but he can’t help but feel a bit suffocated. He knows these feelings are because of his looming fear of seeing his dad but he can’t help but lash out.

“I just took a drive,” he bites, “Can you chill out? It’s not even late.”

You stare back up at him, a little stunned but you press your palm on his chest and rub in circles, “I’m sorry.”

Billy doesn’t expect that reaction and his first response is to push you away, but that’s Neil getting in his head. He sighs and wraps his arms around you, pulling you to his chest and tucking his face into your neck.

“No, I’m sorry,” he mumbles into your hair, “Just not looking forward to going over there.”

Your hands circle around his waist and you squeeze him, “I’ll be with you. We’ll make it quick, just grab as much as we can and leave.”

He pulls back and hooks his finger under your chin, tilting your head back as he leans in to press his lips to yours. It’s chaste but lets you know he trusts you. And anytime his lips are on you, it heats up your thighs and leaves you a little breathless.

“Shall we get it over with then?” Billy grumbles though his tone suggests he really doesn’t want to.

You lace your fingers and pull him out the door. He allows you to lead him across the street and then the two of you just stand at the door. Billy feels as if he has to knock, like he hasn’t just spent a little less than a year living in this house. His knuckles tap against the wood as he prays Max answers the door. She doesn’t.

“It’s about damn time,” Neil spews as he stares at Billy, eyes dark. He eyes dart to you and then back to his son, “Needed your safety blanket, did ya?”

Your blood boils so you squeeze Billy’s hand tighter, “We’re just here to get some of his stuff.”

You figure you’ll do the talking, maybe make this a little easier. Neil opens the door wide, stepping back and you can see Susan peeking her head out of the kitchen. Billy tugs you inside, making a beeline for his bedroom door. Upon opening it, Billy sees that Neil has sold all his stuff and all that’s left is his stereo system and two packed boxes on the floor. His face heats up, he wants to scream at his dad but it’s a losing battle. He knows what Neil will say. He bought everything that was in there. Billy knows because the stereo is still there, it was the first thing Billy bought when he got his first ever paycheck.

He heaves a sigh and then looks over to you, “Can you manage the two boxes? It won’t hurt the… ya know.”

“Billy, I’m like maybe a few weeks along, it’s a little tadpole in there,” you say and then your eyes widen, realizing that you’ve just admitted you were pregnant.

You turn around to see Neil standing in the doorway, looking dumbfounded.

“Fuck,” Billy curses, bringing his hand to rub his brow.

“What was that?” Neil asks, stepping into the room.

Billy heaves a sigh and turns to his dad, “Nothing.”

“Nothing?” he scoffs, “Sounded to me like your little girlfriend just said she’s pregnant.”

“Pregnant?” Susan’s voice rings through the hall and she hurries to stand in the doorway.

Billy doesn’t say anything, he just starts stacking the speakers onto the cassette deck.

“You really fucked up,” Neil laughs sinisterly, the sound startling you and causing bile to rise up your throat. You swallow it down and go to grab the boxes but Neil stops you, “I’ll get the boxes. You shouldn’t be doing any heavy lifting.”

“No, it’s fine,” you try but he’s already picking them up with ease and heading for the door.

“Shit,” Billy says, grabbing the stereo and following after his dad.

You eye Susan curiously before walking out behind your boyfriend. Neil’s already at your doorstep when you get outside and Billy’s quickly shuffling across the street after him.

“Dad,” he calls out.

Neil bangs on the door and your dad opens it. Your hearts in your chest as you run after them. You have no idea what Neil’s plan is but you’re scared he’s gonna deck your dad right in the face.

“Neil,” your dad says, opening the door wider to let him in. You and Billy right behind him.

“Go ahead and just set those down anywhere,” Mary says to him, perched over the kitchen counter.

You shut the door behind you, letting out the breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding.

“Dad,” Billy pleads again, but nothing follows. He doesn’t know what he’s asking Neil not to do.

“So my sons knocked your daughter up, has he?” Neil says after dropping the boxes on the floor.

This is all your fault. The guilt rises in your throat and threatens to pour out, you reach to Billy for comfort once he’s set the stereo down.

“It would appear so,” your dad says, leaning against the kitchen table as he looks to Neil casually.

“And you didn’t kill him?” Neil responds, crossing his arms.

Your dad shrugs, “I like the kid.”

Neil chuckles, but it doesn’t sound happy, like he can’t fathom anyone liking his son. He shakes his head, seems defeated and you and Billy both admire your dad.

“Is that all, then?” your dad asks, crossing his arms.

“Well what’s the plan then? When are you getting married?” Neil asks, turning to his son now.

Billy clears his throat and you notice he starts tapping his foot, “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” Neil scoffs, “Well, boy, you better figure it out. You don’t want to marry her? You should’ve thought that before you did something so damn irresponsible.”

The words sting your chest and your dad moves in front of Billy, physically shielding him from Neil.

“Thanks for stopping by,” your dad says, “We’ll make sure to let you know the plan.”

Billy’s shocked when his dad retreats, through all the years of abuse, he’s never seen his dad give up on a fight. He takes a deep breath when the door slams. Most of all, though, he’s embarrassed. Without a word, he picks the stereo up and lugs it into your room.

“Thank you, dad…” you hug your father, unable to truly express your gratitude.

“Let Billy know that I didn’t only do that for you, I did it for him,” your dad says, a solemn smile on his face.

You nod, squeezing him once more before trailing to your room to see Billy still holding the stereo. He has no idea where to put it, you have too much stuff. You put your hand on his shoulder, “I’ll give mine to my brother. Yours is better anyways.”

Billy heaves a sigh, remaining silent as he watches you unplug your stereo and gather the speakers. You leave to put it in your brothers room, saying a quiet hello to him when he peers up at you from his book.

“Aw, really?” he sets the book down and sits up.

You place it on his dresser, “Yeah, Billy’s is better than this one.”

“Thanks, sis,” he says, springing up from his bed, “I don’t have any cassettes.”

“I’ll give you some,” you offer, placing your hands on your hips as you look at him.

“Was that his dad?” he asks, biting his nail.

You slap his hand from his mouth, not wanting him to form the habit, “Yeah.”

“Are you really having a baby?” he asks, a tilt of his head.

You nod, giggling as you ruffle up his hair, “Yeah, you’re gonna be an uncle.”

He grins up at you, “I hope it’s a boy.”

“Billy does too,” you reply, “I hope it’s a girl.”

“Typical,” your brother says, poking at the buttons on the stereo set.

You roll your eyes and head back to your room, noticing Billy’s set up the stereo but he’s no longer in the room. You peer curiously out the door to see him walking up to you with the boxes in his hands. He sets them on the floor and sits in front of them, opening the first up to inspect what Neil wanted him to keep. To his surprise, it’s all the things he's kept of his mothers. His heart aches, wanting so desperately to tell her she’s going to be a grandmother, wanting to tell her everything that’s happened since she left.

“He didn’t throw any of it away,” Billy mumbles in disbelief.

“Is it your moms stuff?” you ask, as you sit beside him.

He hands you a photo, it’s of an infant Billy being held by a beautiful blonde lady. You’d never seen any photos of Billy as a baby.

“Huh,” you say, “So our kids gonna be this cute.”

Billy shoves you playfully, “With any luck, it’ll only have my genes.”

You giggle, happy when this side of Billy makes a resurgence. “I’m hoping and praying.”

He hands you another photo, one of when he’s roughly a year old and he’s standing in front of his mom while holding onto her hands. He’s learning how to walk. You scan over it, smiling back at his mom. “She’s so pretty,” you muse, “You look like her.”

You swear he blushes, “Yeah, she was beautiful.”

He continues pulling the items out, showing you every photo and explaining every random item. Billy visibly relaxes, an easy smile plastered on his face and he’s never looked prettier. You kiss his face, starting at his jaw and all the way up to his hairline.

“Oh! Wait!” You spring up and barrel out of the room, only to return with an empty photo album. You sit back down and hand it to him, “Here, you can put them in here.”

He takes it gratefully and gradually, the two of you fill the photo album. Billy then moves onto the second box. It’s his jewelry and a few clothing items but at the bottom of it, his dirty magazines sit. Billy laughs, pulling them out.

“Why the hell didn’t he just throw these away?”

“Who is he to become between a man and his porn collection?” you tease, pulling the first Penthouse magazine from him.

You start flipping through it, seeing in your peripheral that Billy’s watching you with an amused expression. After flipping a page, Polaroids fall into your lap. You drop the magazine and gather up the photos, blushing when you see they’re of you and Billy. Some raunchier than others.

“You kept these?” you ask, softly.

“How do you think I got through those weeks without ya?” he nudges your shoulder.

You look at him, mouth agape. You’re extremely flattered at the thought of Billy pleasuring himself to photos of you. Granted, half of these, his dick is inside of you but still.

“You jacked off to these?” you ask, lowering your voice.

“Oh, yeah,” he says, grabbing them from your hand and shuffling through them. “This one’s my favorite,” he hands you a Polaroid, it’s one of the day at the lake.

You’re embarrassed as you look down at your body, riding Billy on a towel with your swimsuit top not covering your breasts but pulled to the sides. Then you tilt your head, looking at where your bodies meet and you can see just the tiniest inch of his cock. It is a hot photo and you remember how turned on you got when Billy reached for the camera.

Suddenly, you feel his lips on your neck and then his tongue, wet and hot against your sensitive flesh. You moan softly at the feeling, tilting your head even more to give him access while you continue to look at the photo. He reaches into your pants, cupping you over your underwear and your breath hitches in your throat. He gently moves his fingers, teasing the wetness out of you. The photo flutters out of your grip.

“You like it, too,” he notes, feeling you soak through the thin cotton.

“Uh huh,” you moan, awkwardly spreading your thighs and feeling as the magazines and photos fall from your lap onto the floor.

His hand rises a bit, just to snake into your underwear and his fingertips drag up through folds and stop at your clit. He sucks on your neck, rubbing languid circles against your sensitive bud. You lean back, hands pressing on the floor behind you to keep you upright. Billy’s fingers feel like magic, always do. You ache for him, want to feel him all over. You get frustrated sometimes, wanting him closer even if he’s as close as he can physically be.

“Billy,” you whimper, your arms shaking as you try to hold yourself up but when he slides two fingers inside you, you collapse onto your back and kick your feet out to spread your legs further.

He chuckles, leaning down to kiss your lips softly. He pulls away too quickly, so you cling onto his shirt and pull him back down, feeling his smile into the kiss. You lick against his teeth, still pulling at his shirt. He gives you what you want, licking into your mouth and curling his fingers inside you. Your back arches off the ground, moaning into his mouth. He groans back, his fingers faltering when you reach over to feel his cock straining against his jeans. You’re eager, unbuttoning his jeans and trying to claw them down, but with the way he’s positioned you can’t. He lifts his bum up and helps shove them to his thighs with his free hand. Your fingers wrap around his cock as soon as it’s free, stroking him quickly. He laughs against your mouth.

“Slow down,” he mumbles and you lick his teeth again, groaning in protest but you still listen.

You can hear his breathing and the slick sound of his fingers pumping in and out of your soaking pussy. You swipe your thumb against his tip, feeling his precum bubbling out and you spread it around which earns you a guttural groan from the blonde. You lift your other hand and push him back, leaning yourself over to take him in your mouth. You have to taste. Swirling your tongue around his pulsing head, your hand strokes whatever’s not in your mouth. Billy leans his head back, biting his lip to stifle his moans. If only he’d turned on the stereo when he plugged it in.

Billy’s pulling his hand away only to snake both of them into your hair, propping himself on his knees and pushing you further down on his cock. You’d be pissed about the loss but his pursuit of his own pleasure turns you on more. You position yourself better in front of him, grabbing onto his thighs while you breath through your nose as you take him into your mouth as deep as you can. You bob your head, by the aid of Billy’s grip on your hair as he guides you up and down. You look up to see his eyes meeting yours, mouth slightly agape and his eyes glassy. You can’t help but gag as he reaches the back of your throat and he moans, voice hoarse and just a tad whiny. It makes you squirm, feeling slick dripping down your thighs.

“Fuck,” he whines, as you pull off him with a loud pop, drool stringing between your lips and the head of his cock.

You stick your tongue out, eyes wide up at him and he wraps his fingers around his cock as he slaps it against your tongue. Your lips tug up before you wrap them around his head again, sucking hard and then pulling off again. Billy’s pushing you down into your back, then. He rips your leggings and panties off before following suit with your top and bra. As he’s lining himself up with your center, you start unbuttoning his work shirt and pushing it off his shoulders, the sleeves catching at his elbows. He gets the hint, smiling when he pulls it off and then grabs the hem of his tank top, bringing it over his head and tossing it aside. He presses his palm against your chest, easing you back down. He grabs his dick again and presses his tip through your folds, shaking it against your clit. You gasp, hands squeezing your own breasts.

“Give it to me, Billy,” you beg, “please.”

He smirks and then plunges his cock into you. It stings slightly as he bottoms out, his hand coming up to dig his fingers into your thigh. Your eyes flutter shut and he brings his other hand to grab your jaw.

“Look at me,” he orders and you obey, eyelids flying open to see his gorgeous, flushed face looking back at you.

Billy shoves his fingers in your mouth and you suck on them lazily, moaning around them as he rocks his hips against you. He pumps in and out of you, deep and slow as his thumb digs into your cheek. It’s crazy, with his fingers shoved in your mouth and his cock balls deep in you, all you can think is how fucking much you love him. How you can’t live without him. How you never want to go a day without this.

“Closer,” you mouth around his fingers.

He pulls them out and looks down at you curiously, slowing his thrusts.

“Closer, want you closer,” you plead.

Billy smiles, leaning down and wrapping his arms around you before pulling you up, holding you against his chest. Your arms circle his neck, holding him close while he moves his hips quicker again. You moan softly against his ear, clinging onto him for dear life. His arms tighten around you and you’re thankful for all the working out he does. He’s able to press against your g-spot with every thrust as this angle and you’re quickly coming undone around him. In attempt to help, you writhe against him. His labored breathing followed by small, high pitched moans in your ear pushes you along. You scratch at his upper back, letting him know you’re close and he starts pounding up into you harder. It snaps, the build up of your orgasm falling over the edge and you shake against him, biting his shoulder to quiet the cry you let out.

Billy’s leaning down, resting you on your back and relentlessly thrusting into you. You scratch all the way down his back, overwhelmed with pleasure as you ride out your climax. He freezes, eyes squeezing shut and gritting his teeth as he releases inside of you. You hold onto his face, wrapping your legs around his waist and grinding your hips up against him. He whimpers, hands grabbing onto your hips to pin you down. He collapses his weight on top of you and it’s the most comfortable feeling in the world. You squeeze him in your arms and pepper his neck with kisses.

He finally lifts himself up to his elbows and gazes down at you, curls sticking to his face with sweat. He looks ethereal, always does but more so now than ever.

“I love you,” he whispers, caressing your face.

“I love you, Billy.”

-

Three months of saving and he’s about to burn through it in an instant. Billy peers down at the ring, reading the engraving and second guessing himself. Not about proposing, but about the words he’s chosen.

Forever, Snoopy.

He knows you’ll get it but it feels cheesy and he’s a bit uncomfortable with that side of him showing. He knows he shouldn’t feel embarrassed around you. Besides, girls like that kind of mushy, romantic stuff. Billy has a hard time with being perceived as anything other than tough and cool so he tells himself you’ll think the ring is cool and that it was very cool of him to reference how you met and totally not tacky and cheesy.

It burns a hole in his pocket as he walks into the restaurant, seeing you sitting there with your dad, brother and Mary and wonders if proposing in such a public setting is a bad idea. Oh, God, what if you say no?

He feels his lunch threaten to make a reappearance and he redirects his path to the bathroom. He locks the door behind him and looks at himself in the mirror. He wore his best shirt, the maroon one and he’s only buttoned the last two buttons. He shimmies out of his leather jacket, suddenly feeling too hot. He rests it on the counter and then turns the cold water on. He splashes it on his face and then takes a deep breath. Why would you say no? There’s no possible timeline in which you say no to marrying him.

Hell, he’d asked your dad this morning and if he doubted your acceptance he would’ve said something like ‘Sure, Billy, spend all of the tiny bit you’ve saved to move out of my house to get rejected by my daughter’ instead of “Yes, of course you have my blessing.”

Billy takes a deep breath and exits the bathroom, only to turn around and retrieve his jacket. Nerves be damned, he was gonna marry you. He arrives to the table and you stand to greet him, his eyes darting to the tiny baby bump more obvious than it’s ever been in the tight dress you’re wearing. He kisses you, hand pressing to your hip as he does so.

“Hi, baby,” you say to him with those dreamy eyes.

“Hi,” he coos back, his nerves subsiding the second your eyes meet. He forgets why he was nervous in the first place. “Sorry, I'm late,” he apologizes to you and then your family, as he sits down.

Your dad gives him a knowing smile and it makes Billy even more nervous. He’s in his own head during the whole dinner, missing questions directed at him. You reach over and squeeze his bicep, asking if he’s alright and Billy just nods.

Then he tells himself he’s got nothing to worry about and maybe right now isn’t the right time to propose. He ignores your dads pointed looks and when you excuse yourself to restroom Billy announces to the table, “I am going to propose just not here.”

“You nervous?” Dale chuckles, sipping his wine.

Billy blushes, “I just… I don’t know, feel like we should be alone.”

Mary reaches in her bag and pulls out the Polaroid camera, “Then you have to take the photo.”

“I can’t do both at the same time,” Billy explains, a little exasperated.

Mary grins, “Why don’t you do it when she gets back? As she walks up, get down on one knee.”

Billy’s eyes widen, thinking about what a spectacle that would be, “God, no. I want to do it when we’re alone.”

“It’s their story, Mary,” your dad says, “Let them write it.”

“Fine,” she grumbles and reaches for her wine.

“I’ll ask for you if you’re scared,” your brother offers Billy earnestly.

Billy pats his back, “Thanks, kid but I’ve got to do this myself.”

You return to the table and raise an eyebrow as they all turn to Billy expectantly, “What’s going on?”

“Nothing!” Billy smiles too wide at you.

And he doesn’t ask, he thinks about it when you’re cuddling before bed that night but he can’t bring himself to do it. He presses kisses against the back of your neck

“You know I love you, right?” he mumbles, almost too quiet for you to hear.

You lean your head back, awkwardly angling your lips to his. He squeezes your waist and kisses back deeply.

“I love you, too Billy. Why are you acting weird?” you turn around to look into his eyes.

“I’m not acting weird,” he argues, but his cheeks feel hot.

“Are you trying to ask for a blow job?” you tease, pushing his hair back.

“I mean…” he laughs, “If you’re offering, I’ll accept.”

“Go to bed,” you giggle and tuck your head in his shoulder.

He’ll ask in the morning, he decides.

😍😍😍

BASIC BIOLOGY - BILLY HARGROVE X READER (PART THREE | FINAL PART) | PART ONE | PART TWO

word count: 9492 // masterlist | inbox (please request) | WIP list

Summary: you're paired with billy for a biology project. you only visit his house once, but it's enough for you to understand why he doesn't want you to come over again. when he starts showing up more and more in your life, you realize that it's basic biology: you were made for him, and he was made for you.

Contents: mentions of injuries (healed/healing), trauma, discussions of billy's past, angst with a fluffy ending, cows !

A/N: oh my gosh ! the end ! it feels like i've been working on this forever and thinking about it even longer, and as a new-ish writer on the billy scene, i just want to thank you all for how sweet you've been, in response to this fic and many others. your support is so important to me, and i'm so glad that many of you enjoyed this fic. i hope that you like the ending, too, please tell me what you think!

reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated! your feedback motivates me to write more, so thank you for your support :-)

You wake up beside Billy Hargrove differently than you’d fallen asleep beside him. Where his face had been previously tucked snug to your neck, his breath fanning out over your collarbones, his cheek is smushed to your chest now. His arm is slung over your stomach, one of his legs thrown over your own as his torso lays slumped up against yours. His cheek chubs up where it’s resting on your breast, and- god, his eyelashes are beautiful. The eyes behind them are just as gorgeous, but for now you’re glad they’re shut. He looks so relaxed, so peaceful, and you’d stay still for an eternity beneath him if it meant he’d be able to stay in that drowsy state of serenity. 

His curls are mussed with sleep, bent out of shape and frizzy where they’d typically be slicked. There’s still bruises littered over his face but they’ve already begun healing, shifting in color to be lighter and less jarring. 

Your fingers come up without you noticing to brush over one of his curls. It’s soft to the touch, and you give it an experimental squeeze, watching as it bounces back. You notice that it’s tangled slightly with another strand, and brush your pinky between them to separate the tangle.

It must tug lightly on Billy’s scalp, because he heaves an unconscious sigh. You wait for him to frown, to wake and snap at you for touching his precious hair, but he never does. Instead he settles again, eyes still firmly shut.

You can’t help it; you reach for his scalp. Your nails scrape gently, ever-so-slightly over his skin, brushing over hundreds of individual strands of hair rooted there and curled together. 

Your breath catches in your throat as he moves. He hums, deep, soft, and low in his throat, the sound vibrating in his chest that’s pressed to your side. It sends a shiver up your spine, but it’s quickly quelled with the warmth that comes from his face as he presses it even further into your chest. Now his cheek is practically invisible, buried in your breast and angling his nose to one side. He tightens his arm around your waist, hoisting himself up and over you even further than he’d been before. He reminds you of a cat, purring and leaning into soft touches.

He seems to like it, so you don’t stop. You rove your fingers through every inch of his scalp, scratching and stroking and smoothing through his curls until they’re a mass of individual strands instead of grouped twists. It’s ridiculously soft, and you wonder how you’ve been able to refrain from touching his hair before now.

There’s nothing you’d rather do than stay here for eternity. Holding him, brushing through his hair, loving him. But your bladder has other wishes. 

Wrestling yourself out from under him is difficult, but he accepts a pillow in exchange for your torso. He burrows his face into it just the same, and you can’t help but brush over his curls one last time as you stand over him, tucking the blankets up and around his shoulders.

When he’s securely tucked into your covers and snoozing away, you pad out of your bedroom, thankful that your parents work early shifts.

You seem to have woken up at a perfect time to make a breakfast larger than you normally do. It takes double the time to prepare a meal for the two of you, and you’re thankful that you think to group the eggs together in a pan to cut that extra time down. You’re setting plates at the table, stuffed with eggs, toast, and fresh fruit when Billy emerges from the hallway, staring cautiously at you where he stands.

His hair is haphazardly smoothed, but there’s no fixing the frizz that your fingers had worked out of it. Your clothes look good on him, even if the sweatpants are stretched over his upper calves instead of at his ankles from how he’d shifted in his sleep. Your shirt is riding up at his stomach and you politely avoid looking at his toned torso, even if you really want to.

“Breakfast,” You hum, pointing your spatula at the table, “Orange juice or milk?”

“Uh-” He flounders, blinking rapidly, “Water, please. Or- I can get it.”

He makes to step towards the kitchen but you whirl your spatula around to face him, intent on pampering the boy, “No, just go sit down. I can do it.”

He looks properly chided, a sheepish smile tugging at his lips as he ducks to hide it from you.

You set an ice cold glass of water at his place and notice that he’s waited to begin eating until you sat down. You give him the go-ahead, digging into a chunk of egg with your fork.

“Sleep good?” You glance up at him, a questioning glance shot through your lashes. He nods, silent and careful, and you realize that he seems to have closed himself off since last night, and you think that maybe leaving the bed before he woke wasn’t the best idea, even if it was just to make breakfast. You try remedying it by knocking your foot against his under the table, and he nearly chokes on his water. You leave your foot pressed flush to his own, a constant reminder of your touch on his skin.

“Does your stomach still hurt?” You try again, gulping down OJ. 

“A bit,” His morning voice is raspy and you know you’re going to fawn over it later, even if you’re trying hard not to take advantage of his vulnerability.

“It’s mostly a cut up here,” He reaches a hand under his (your) shirt, rubbing at a patch below his left pec. You can see his fingers move under the shirt, and you remember the wound that’s there from last night.

“That probably means your ribs aren’t broken,” You conclude, relief washing over you at the fact that his bruises are just that.

“Nah, not broken,” He shakes his head, stuffing fruit into his mouth and ignoring the way juice drips down his chin, “I know what a broken rib feels like.”

You still, looking up suspiciously at him with your head ducked to your plate. His shoulders slump, “Just some kid from school. He had rings on, and he hit hard.”

“Oh,” You supply lamely, “I’m glad they healed.”

You eat in silence for a few bites, but he doesn’t shy away from your touch beneath the table, and you’re thankful for that. He even shifts his foot to press more against yours, his sock slightly itchy against your skin. Right after he leans into your touch, he speaks.

“My dad doesn’t usually… do this. This was bad, he tries not to leave marks. I think-” He hesitates, and you nudge his foot with your own again, encouraging him, “I think he’d be even more angry if I missed school than whatever he was mad about in the first place. So he has to keep things inconspicuous. And if anyone sees anything I just have to make excuses.”

“I’m sorry,” You say, not out of pity, but sympathy, “I… I really don’t know how you do it. You’re strong, Billy, y’know that?”

He scoffs into his honeydew.

“I mean it,” You press on, “You just… take it. You let him do that to you because if you fight back other people might get hurt, and that takes strength. Even if it feels weak to get beat on, just know you’re saving your stepsister and her mom, and… I’m proud of you.”

He stills for a moment, jaw stiffening in the middle of a chewing motion. He swallows dry, but whatever it is goes down fine, and he clears his throat without meeting your eye.

“He used to hit my mom,” Billy admits, voice now hoarse from emotion rather than sleep. He scrunches his eyes shut momentarily, “I.. I couldn’t stop him. I was too young. And she left. So I guess I just… got bigger. Just in case.”

You recall seeing a set of weights in his living room. You had presumed they were his, but hadn’t bothered to ask among discussions of mitosis. Now, though, you realize he’s bulked himself up to combat his dad’s abuse, even if he uses it to protect others rather than himself.

It spreads a thin layer of mist over your eyes, the thought of preteen Billy experimenting with handheld five-pounders in hopes of blocking a punch. What hits you even harder is his current image, a toned teen who still doesn’t have the heart to hit back.

You can’t figure out how to respond. If you say you’re proud of him again, he might shut down. If you sound like you’re pitying him, he’ll be angry. So instead you reach over the table, your fork clattering to the wood as you take his free hand.

He’s startled by the sudden movement paired with the noise, but he makes up for his momentary flinch by ghosting his thumb softly over the back of your hand. His fingers don’t curl against yours, so it’s not a mutual gesture, you’re just holding his hand. Slowly, surely, his fingers move inch by inch, slipping between your own and settling against your skin.

You wonder if it’s the first time anyone’s ever held his hand.

“Thanks,” He breathes, his breath a huff of cantaloupe scent. He sniffles, hard, aggressively, and you know he doesn’t want you to acknowledge the tear that streaks fast down his cheek. 

You let him wipe it away without saying anything, even though you want to tell him it’s okay. You hope that the way you squeeze his hand tells him that, though, because it’s true. It’s okay for him to cry, and you’re glad that, even if he tries hiding it around you, he feels safe enough to let the tears fall in the first place.

The rest of your breakfast is filled with mindless chatter, a few gossip strands weaving their way through an otherwise pleasant conversation. He learns that Amanda Weaver has been telling everyone he gave her a promise ring, but you’d seen her fish the plain silver band off of her keychain. 

“I don’t even know her,” He snorts, “And promise rings are dumb.”

Your nose wrinkles, “I don’t think so. They’re cute.”

“They’re pointless,” He insists, shoveling egg into his mouth, “Having a ring to chuck in the garbage is gonna hurt a whole lot more when they leave.”

“If.” You murmur.

“Hm?” He glances up at you, mouth full.

“If they leave.” You correct him quietly, “Some people stay.”

He’s frozen. Baby blues unblinking, he stares at you like a deer in headlights. You hold his gaze with your own steady one, waiting until his brain wraps around what you’re really trying to tell him: I’ll stay.

He’s quiet, for a long time. He keeps his eyes on his eggs, roving over every crease and hill in their structure. Then he mumbles so soft you can barely hear it, “Right.”

There’s a thousand things you want to say. A thousand promises you want to make, a thousand reassuring words you want to mumble against his skin so that they’re absorbed. But the not-so-nice blare of your kitchen timer kindly reminds you it’s time to get to school, and you settle for none at all.

“Shit,” You mumble, shoveling your last bite of melon into your mouth and standing, “I’ll get my-!” 

You glance back at him when you feel a tug, and he’s sitting in place, hand still entwined with yours. He’s cautious, frozen, and you melt into a smile, squeezing his hand.

“My bag.” You clarify, “Are we taking the bus, or walking to your place?”

“Let’s walk,” He decides, his hand never letting up in its grip on yours. It’s bold, it’s forward, it’s healing.

“Okay,” You grin, keeping your fingers tightly curled around Billy’s and tugging him up through the shared embrace, “Let’s go! I’ve gotta be on time today, we’re taking a quiz in first period.”

“We don’t have to go in, we can just get my car.” He lets you drag him to the living room, “The only thing I keep in my bag are cigarettes, anyways. I can bum a few.”

“Billy,” You scold, “Where do your papers go?”

“In the trash.”

“Nice,” You scoff, wincing as you step outside and the harsh sunlight hits your eyes. You fumble with your house keys, slipping them into the lock to close up the house, “I’m gonna buy you a binder. And you’re gonna put your school stuff in it, nice and neat, and you’re gonna carry a pencil, and you’re gonna bring water, and you’re gonna-”

“And you’re gonna fall,” He yanks on your hand, pulling you tight to his side as he points at a rock you’d been headed for, “Pay attention, clumsy.”

“Oh.” You flounder, his toned arm against your cheek as you struggle to right yourself, “Thanks.”

“Anytime,” He flashes you a grin you’ve seen before, primarily aimed at his basketball teammates or a girl he’s chatting up. It’s confident, shit-eating, and it sends a wave of butterflies through your stomach.

The walk to his house isn’t terribly long. It’s a trek, for sure, but you’re there in under a half-hour, laughing all the while. Billy’s hand is still firmly gripping yours, and he’s funny, you remember, when he’s not crying.

“Dad’s not home,” He clocks the car missing from the driveway, “I can get mine and go.”

“Get your bag,” You order, face stern and brows scrunched, “And don’t throw away any of your school papers today!”

“No promises, babe,” He teases, his own key in his pocket as he jams it into the door. You’re thankful that he turns away to step inside so that he doesn’t see your eyes widen at the nickname, but you hope your hand doesn’t begin to sweat, or he’ll notice.

“Maxine?” He calls, shouting through the house. There’s no reply, and her sneakers aren’t by the front door, so you presume she’s not home.

“Probably skated,” Billy shrugs, “My bag’s in my room.”

He doesn’t have to drag you there, you know the way. You send a withering glare towards the room at the end of the hall, where you know Billy’s dad sleeps, as if it’ll cast a curse over the doorway and land him seven years of bad luck. You see the fireplace poker on your way, set neatly back in its place. There’s blood on it.

He changes quick, and you occupy yourself with the collection of tapes by his closet. He’d yanked your shirt right off of his head like you weren’t standing there, but when you’d turned with burning cheeks to give him some privacy, he hadn’t said anything.

Billy’s persistence on holding your hand is sweet, but surprising. The last thing you’d have expected from him was a clingy puppy-boy, but his head turns to track you whenever your hand nearly slips out of his own, and he wrestles with his bag one-handed instead of dropping the embrace. You’re just glad he’s finally holding onto something good in his life instead of pushing it away.

You think it’s a massive inconvenience that he can’t drive while holding your hand. He tries, at first, resting them on the center console, but when he changes lanes and almost overshoots it, you pry your hand out of his own.

“Two hands,” You laugh bashfully, “It’s okay, we- uh, later… later we can…”

“Later,” He turns his head to grin at you, a brilliant display as he slaps his now-free hand onto the wheel,  “Later’s good.”

Unfortunately, later gets pushed back a lot. When Billy pulls into the parking lot, the bell rings. He knows you’re going to be late for your quiz, so he doesn’t try to keep you, smiling softly, “Just go. See you in bio.”

Then between classes, you catch a glimpse of him in the hall. Your stomach starts acting up again, butterflies coming in droves, mind reeling with the thought of him grabbing your hand in public. He almost does, eyes widening as he catches sight of you, broad shoulders muscling everyone out of the way. But before he can reach you, a similarly-toned man steps up beside him, a basketball jersey slung over his frame.

He talks, and talks, and talks and talks and talks, all waving arms and loud jeering. Billy tries holding your gaze over his shoulder, nodding mindlessly along to whatever the boy is saying, but the warning bell rings and you send him a soft, defeated smile.

‘Later,’ You mouth, and his eyes dim when he nods.

Your efforts are futile at lunch, too. He has the class period before with a few of his friends, loud and brash, not your style. It means that you occupy your normal seat, a corner of a bench that the group to your left isn’t using, and tug out a book to entertain yourself. You feel his gaze burning against the side of your head, but if you get caught staring at him, his friends will turn it into some wild story about how you’re infatuated with him, and you’re not the type of person that makes that observation a compliment, at least, not to Billy’s friends. You almost hope he stops looking at you, too, because if they catch him staring, you don’t know how they’ll torment you.

It almost kills him to wait until you’re seated together in biology to reach for your hand. You’d never seen him arrive to class earlier than today, he’s even there before you are. He doesn’t bother to hide his staring, icy eyes tracking you from the second you walk through the door to the second you sit beside him.

You’re thankful that you’re officially seated together now, and you’re thinking that maybe you don’t hate group projects as much as you thought you did.

“Hey,” He murmurs, sliding his hand across the back of yours under the desk.

“Hey,” You hum, flipping your hand over to meet his palm-to-palm.

Everything seems right with the world again.

There’s a certain security you get from Billy’s touch, even if he probably gets more from yours. Having someone to hold grounds you, and you hope it does the same for him. It’s strange, feeling such a strong connection to someone you’d only started talking to days before, but you suppose that’s what happens when you remove all of the formalities of friendship. Your first sleepover just happened to be in an effort to keep him alive, not to eat junk food and watch movies.

You try to pay attention to the teacher, you really do. But she’s nowhere near as interesting as the soft scratching of Billy’s pencil on your paper, and you can’t help but watch as he writes.

You need a ride home?

You reach for your own pencil, scrawling your answer and sliding the paper to him in response

I can take the bus. You should take Max, she skated this morning.

He nearly breaks his pencil writing: She’s got tutoring after school today, she skates home anyways.

Okay, You decide, and you see him smile out of the corner of his eye as you write the word, Thanks, Billy.

He squeezes your hand, and he doesn’t need to write ‘You’re welcome’ for you to know it’s what he’s saying.

Biology typically drones on. You try to stay on top of your schoolwork, of course, but that doesn’t mean you enjoy it. The class is suddenly a lot less dreary with Billy beside you, and it becomes a game of stifling giggles. He steps on the toe of your shoe beneath the table, you tug at one of his curls. He crowds your space with his shoulder and nudges you to the edge of your seat, you let go of his hand to pinch at his thigh. He has to stifle a groan at that one, and to do so he thumps his head forwards on his desk, using the cool plastic against his forehead to quell his rugged laughter.

The thunk of his head against the desk alerts your teacher, and you sit up straight, eyes on your paper that’s covered in doodles as you try not to laugh. She scoffs, seeing Billy slumped over the desk, and probably assumes he’s fallen asleep. When she turns away, you elbow him, dipping your head down to where his rests on the desk to whisper in his ear.

“Cut it out,” You hiss, kicking his foot beneath the desk, “She almost saw!”

“Oh no,” He gushes, turning his head so that a sliver of his face shows, glinting with a shit-eating grin, “Do you think we’ll get in trouble?”

“It’s not funny!” You insist, keeping your voice as hushed as possible, “I’ve never been in trouble before, and if I get sent to the principal’s office, I’ll-”

“Y/L/N! Hargrove!” You stiffen at the voice of your teacher, your eyes widening where Billy’s only sparkle with excitement, “You two seem distracted. Anything on your minds?”

“Not mitosis.” Billy quips, straightening up from the desk and leaning back in his chair. He earns a few laughs from his scattered friends, and the teacher’s face hardens. Your stomach drops.

“You think you’re funny? You’re one missed homework assignment from failing this class. And now you’re dragging Y/N into this, too? Both of you, head to the front office. This ends here.”

There are tears burning at your eyes. You’re not the best student in the world. Hell, you’re not even in the top ten. But you’re not a bad one either, at best you slip through the cracks. You’ve never had disciplinary action taken against you, and gathering your things amongst the tense silence of your peers feels like a death sentence. 

Billy barely remembers to get his own bag, and he pointedly leaves his papers scattered over his desk. You scoop them up in your own handful, and he waits diligently by your side as you pick up your things. When you’re finally packed up he snatches your hand from where it’s hanging at your side, marching the both of you to the door.

He offers the teacher a very quaint, very polite middle finger as he drags you out of the door, and that’s what does it. The second the door shuts behind you, you burst into tears.

He looks up, alarmed at the sob you let out. The classroom you’d just exited has a row of windows that your back is facing, and he’s worried that if you turn slightly, your classmates will see you cry. As much as you’d told him it was okay to cry this morning, he’s sure you wouldn’t want your peers witnessing the meltdown you’re having. He acts fast, using your intertwined hands and yanking you into the nearest bathroom.

Your sobs echo off of the tile, and he pulls you haphazardly into his chest. Your head rests there pitifully, shoulders slumped as you cry.

“Jesus, okay,” He pants, peering under the few stalls in the back to make sure you’re alone, “What’s wrong?”

“I- I don’t know!” You do know, but it feels embarrassing to say it out loud, “I just- I’ve never been in trouble before, and it’s going on my-” You break to quell another sob, tamping it down in your chest, “Permanent record, and-!”

“Okay, calm down.” Billy scoffs, and you’re surprised to find that it’s not a derogatory one, but a fond one, “It’s fine. All we were doing was talking, it’s not like we were smoking weed in the bathroom.”

Your head shoots up and you recognize your surroundings. You glare at him suspiciously, “You don’t have any weed on you, right?”

“No!” He laughs incredulously, “I do not have any weed on me. Now,” He takes your shoulders in his broad hands, and your fingers go cold now that his aren’t intertwined with them anymore.

“You and I are gonna calm down,” He tells you, voice slow and steady. You’re the only one that needs to calm down, but you appreciate his cooperation.

“Then we’re gonna leave this bathroom, and do you know where we’re gonna go?”

“The front office,” You recite, but he breaks into a grin, shaking his head so that his curls fly.

“But that’s where she told us-”

“She can suck my dick.” Billy scoffs, “She made you cry. Forget her.”

“Billy, I can’t just forget her,” You insist, eyes wide and teary, “She’s our teacher!”

“Today’s Friday,” He reminds you, “She’s not our teacher again until Monday.”

“Fine. Where are we really going?” You look at him skeptically, raising your hand to wipe your nose against its back.

“Okay, first, ew.” Billy wrinkles his nose, yanking your hand away from your face and wiping it with a paper towel that he jerks out of the machine. He wipes your nose next, but he does it aggressively, smearing the paper towel against your face and pushing your head back until you’re laughing, trying to swat him away. The sound makes him smile, and it doesn’t fade as he continues talking.

“We’re gonna go see a movie,” He decides, hiking the strap of his bag higher up on his shoulder. Your face darkens slightly, goofy grin dimming.

“We can’t.” You protest softly, “She told us to go to the front office. You said it yourself, Billy, we were just talking. But if we ditch, we’ll be in more trouble, real trouble.”

“I’m always in trouble,” He huffs, “And you’re never in trouble. You really think this’ll be a breaking point for either of us?”

“What’s gonna happen when we don’t show up to the office?”

“They’ll give us detention.”

“We have to go, then!” Your eyes go wide, and you start for the door. He lunges for your hand, grabbing it just before you can push your way out, and this time he doesn’t drop it when he pulls you back inside.

“Detention means we’ll get to sit together for two hours and mess around.”

“No we can’t,” You scoff, “They monitor you. So we can’t just mess around.”

“Hey.” He snaps, begging your attention with those icy blue eyes of his, “Have you ever been in detention before?”

“No.” You admit quietly.

“Right. I have. They don’t care. They don’t want to be there, and they know we don’t either. They’re not gonna punish us any further, ‘cause then they’d just have to sit there with us for longer. Trust me, this will be fun.”

“Fun,” You groan, slumping forwards into his chest rather than covering your face with your hands. It’s a bold move, but a well-received one, and you feel his firm chest shake as he chuckles.

“Yes, fun.” He promises, “But if you really wanna walk up to that office and get lectured…”

“Billy,” You bite the inside of your cheek, lifting your head up so that your chin rests against his chest, “I.. I do. I’m sorry, I know you want to have fun, and- and you can go to the movies if you want! But I don’t want detention on my record. Even if it won’t do anything, I just- it sounds bad.”

“Okay.” He says, after a moment of tense silence. His grin fades, but he doesn’t scoff or push you away. He sighs dramatically, “You’re changing me, y’know. Normally I’d be halfway home by now, but you’ve got me hauling myself in to see the principal, this is bullshit.”

“I told you you could go to the movies!” You gush, laughing weakly at his dramatic display. He brings one of his large hands up to your face, smearing his rough thumb beneath your eyes and wiping away the sticky tear tracks there.

“No,” He sighs again, huffing and puffing, “I’m the one that got you in trouble, I’m not gonna ditch you. We’ll just suffer together.”

His words strike something in you. He’s chosen to change himself, to face consequences for his actions when he’d normally flee. You’re proud of him, so insanely proud that you decide to change yourself as well, and when he leads you towards the office by your intertwined hands, you turn sharply and drag him the other way.

“Wha- Woah.” His eyes widen as you yank him down the hallway, your feet slapping against the shitty linoleum flooring. You beeline for the door, bursting into the daylight with your adrenaline-pumped chest heaving. You come to a stop just outside the building, looking back at him with a thrill glowing in your eyes.

“What movie are we seeing?” You pant, and his grin reappears.

“You’re trouble.” He declares in a laugh, “Let’s go.”

Billy drives fast. This time it doesn’t seem like recklessness, though, but fun. The windows are rolled down, and wind whips through the car and ruffles your hair. His own blonde curls are flying, in his face and over his shoulders against the seat.

“Slow down!” You shriek, laughing through your words, “We’re gonna crash!”

“What are we gonna crash into,” He gestures to the empty road in front of you, all farmland and dust as the same laughter bleeds into his own voice, “A haybale? You want me to slow down so you can admire the scenery?”

There is no scenery. There’s fields, half-dead grass rolling on for miles and miles and passing by so fast that it looks like the sand on a beach. The sky is your ocean, blue and foamy white where clouds streak across it. You pass isolated barns, groves of trees, and-

“Cows!”

“What?”

“Cows! There’s cows up there,” You gush, pointing aggressively at the pasture, “Stop!”

“I can’t-! Uh, okay,” Billy rushes to step on the brakes, wheels screeching against the poorly-paved asphalt as he skids to a stop.

You’re surprised he doesn’t burn through his tires with how fast he stops. You’re out of the car before he can even turn to look at you, seatbelt long unbuckled in favor of dashing for the cows. They’re grazing aimlessly in their pasture, only a weak white fence standing between you and them.

“Hey- Hey!” Billy shouts, rushing to get himself out of the car. He’s panting slightly when he finally stands beside you, regarding you with an indignant look, “What the fuck was that about?”

“Cows,” You croon, sticking your hands over the fence and reaching for the animals, “Come pet the cows with me, Billy!”

One of them seems very interested in any potential snacks your hand might be hiding. Its large, wet nose bumps against your skin and you laugh, long and loud and free, letting the animal explore your scent and petting along its face when it finally realizes you have nothing yummy to offer it.

There’s damp bits of grass stuck to your arm from where its mouth nuzzles against you,, and its tongue is purple when it comes out to swipe along your skin. You shriek, the sound morphing into an elated giggle.

“Oh,” Billy’s nose wrinkles and he takes a step back, “Gross.”

“It’s not gross!” You insist, pulling your arm away to wipe the grass on your jeans, “That’s just what cows do. You’ve never pulled over to pet some?”

“No,” He scoffs, “That’s the most ‘country’ shit I’ve ever heard.”

“Yeah,” You nod gleefully, and he thinks maybe you’ve misinterpreted the scathing tone of his voice, “Come on, Billy, come pet the cows!”

“No thanks,” He shakes his head, “I’m gonna go smoke in the car. Jus’ come back when you’re done.”

You let him head back to the car only for long enough to get a few more scratches in under the chin of a cow to your right. Then you beeline for the passenger’s side, and Billy looks surprised at your arrival.

“Done?”

“No,” You shake your head, reaching for your backpack, “I’m just getting my strawberries.”

“Uh,” Billy watches, apprehensive as you pull a plastic bag of the fruit from your backpack, “You’re not gonna feed those to the cows, are you?”

“Duh,” You nod, pulling the bag open and nearly ripping the seam, “Cows love strawberries, I feed ‘em all the time.”

“You what?” Billy looks at you like you’ve told him you’re made of the red fruit you’re holding, “You’re gonna stick your fingers next to those animal’s faces with food in your hands and you don’t think they’re gonna bite you?”

“No, Billy, cows don’t bite! Not like that,” You insist, hair flying as you shake your head. “I’m not gonna put my fingers in their faces, I’m gonna hold the strawberries on my palm. Then they can’t bite me. Come on, I’ll show you!”

“I’m not feeding cows,” Billy insists, but he moves to get out of the car anyway. When he’s standing at full height he rips the cigarette out from between his lips, blowing smoke into the road, “But I’m not gonna let you run off on your own and get mauled by some hunk of beef.”

“You’re totally gonna feed the cows,” You grin, eyes narrowed at him as you turn on your heel and head back to the fence, “You’ll see!”

You’re already jamming your hand under a cow’s mouth, a strawberry staining your palm red and sticky, when Billy saunters up to the fence. He watches warily as you let the cow nose at your fingers, then it sticks its tongue out to sweep the fruit off of your skin.

You giggle at the ticklish feeling, but Billy’s mouth falls open in horror.

“Oh,” He groans, nose scrunched and grimace strong, “That’s so fucking gross. Its tongue is purple.”

“It’s cool!” You insist, offering the cow a hearty rub between the ears as it munches on your strawberry, hand slimy with spit, “Is there much farmland in California?”

“A bit,” Billy shrugs, blissfully unaware of the curious cow sneaking up behind him as he’s turned towards you, leaning sideways on the fence. “It’s kind of a mix. We didn’t live anywhere near farmland, but sometimes we went to visit Susan’s-!”

Before he can tell you what random relative lived far out in the California farmlands, there’s a cow tongue in his ear.

He jolts away from the fence with a squawk, nearly toppling over as one hand comes up to cover his ear. You’re roaring with laughter even as you help steady him, one hand on his shoulder and the other on his waist while he stumbles to a stop a few feet away from the fence.

“He was looking for strawberries,” You giggle, pulling your sleeve over your hand to wipe cow spit off of his cheek, “I think that was your official welcome to Indiana, Billy.”

“Laugh all you want,” He groans, smearing his own hand over his face to rid his skin of any residual slime you’d missed, “But if we ever make it to an ocean and you wipe out, I’m laughing at you.”

“Deal,” You grin sideways at him, another strawberry in hand.

Of course, Billy does end up feeding the cows. It takes another round of hand-holding, though, where you place the strawberry in his palm and flatten yours beneath it. 

“Just be patient,” You murmur, feeling Billy’s hand tense as the cow noses at his fingers, “He just wants to say hi.”

“We’ve been acquainted,” Billy drawls, grimacing once more as the cow licks the strawberry off of his palm, “He tried eating the thoughts out of my head.”

“What thoughts?” You tease, but before you can gauge the situation and figure out whether you need to start running or not, Billy flips his hand over his shoulder to where you’re standing pressed to his back, and smears his sticky palm across your face.

“Oh,” You gasp, eyes squeezed shut and nose scrunched. You stagger backwards, nearly colliding with his car,  “Gross!”

“Oh, really?” Billy roars with laughter, grabbing you around the waist and leaning his chin over your shoulder as he presses your back to his chest, “I thought it was an Indiana welcome! I thought it was cool!”

“Not when you do it!” You can’t help but laugh, trying desperately to hold the cracked pieces of your disgusted facade together, “You’re not as cute as a cow!”

You’re lying, but he doesn’t need to know that.

“And to think,” He scoffs, loosening his hold on you but not letting go completely, “I was gonna buy your movie ticket for you.”

You’d almost forgotten your movie adventure. You’d been so wrapped up in having fun with Billy, soaring down the streets with music blaring from the speakers that you’d completely ignored the way he’d driven miles away from any nearby movie theater.

“Hey, yeah,” You stiffen in his grip, turning your head to knock your forehead with his. You try not to pay attention to how close you two are, keeping your focus on his stunning blue eyes, “Why are we out here? The theater’s back that way.” You jerk your thumb behind you in the direction you’d came, and his face settles into a smirk once more.

“We’re not going to that shitty theater,” He boasts, “We’re going to a drive-in. It’s a few miles into the next town over.”

It makes sense, you suppose. He has a cool car, and what better place to show it off?

“I’ve never been to a drive-in,” You gush, excitement brewing in your belly, “What are the showtimes?”

“Dunno.” He shrugs, finally letting you go to saunter back to his car and lower himself into the driver’s seat. You follow to the passenger’s side, tucking the empty plastic bag back in your backpack.

“We’ll catch something.” He reasons, hands finally back on the wheel as you shut your door and buckle your seatbelt, “People around here have nothing better to do, I bet there’s movies playing every hour.”

He gets started on the road once more, and you decide to let him drive uninterrupted. Although it hurts you to watch unpet cows whizz by the windows, you know you’ll be back too late if you keep stopping. When his tires crunch against gravel, then smooth over dirt, the unlit neon sign of the drive-in looms overhead. He leans out of the window at the counter, ordering a large popcorn and two sodas along with your tickets in that rough drawl of his.

He’s a bit rough when he stops on the asphalt, but that’s just how he drives. He’s used to driving recklessly, it’s not a habit easily broken. You hope you can help him live better, sending him a soft, sweet smile as he passes you your soda.

“This view good?” He glances over at you, hand already buried in the popcorn.

You nod emphatically, “Mhm! What movie?”

“No clue,” He lets out a huff of a laugh, “Does it really matter?”

“No,” You shrug, “‘Guess not.”

“It’s almost five,” Billy glances at his watch, “Are your parents gonna freak if you’re not home by dark?”

“They’re having dinner with friends tonight,” You recall relievedly, “They’ll probably be out way later than us. And they’ll just leave dinner in the fridge, they won’t know I’m gone.”

“Nice,” Billy nods, absentmindedly gnawing on a solid popcorn kernel, “My dad never goes out with friends. He doesn’t really have any, I don’t think. Susan does, work friends, but she’s probably not eager to show off her husband.”

He speaks about his dad with a bitter tone in his voice, words coming out brittle like they’ll snap if he tries putting any feeling into them. You hum in understanding; if your husband was like Neil Hargrove, you wouldn’t bring him around your friends either.

“You have friends,” You hum, “Don’t you ever eat out with them?”

“Uh,” He turns his head to stare expectantly at you, “Hello? Remember how I drove you a town over to see a movie, and I let you stop us halfway to stage a petting zoo?”

“I don’t mean me,” You gush, “Like, your other friends! The guys on the basketball team, or whoever you usually hang out with. That little crowd. You don’t go out with them?”

“Not really,” Billy shrugs, “They’re not my friends. Not like- um,” He drops his gaze to his lap, picking at the bucket of popcorn, “Not like you are.”

“Oh.” Is all you can manage, then you wet your throat to speak again, “They seem… no offense, shallow. Like- like they only talk about superficial stuff together. I’ve heard some of your conversations, I think.”

“Oh, so you’re updated on the riveting world of Hawkins High’s popularity pageant?” He scoffs, reaching for a cigarette, “Shit’s so stupid.”

“You say that from the top of the food chain,” You point out tentatively, “You don’t like it there?”

“It’s better than nothing.” He slows his attempts to self-medicate, hand frozen where he’s striking his lighter, “Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad I’m not getting pushed into lockers. But, it’s like-” His fingers tighten slightly around the cig, jaw tight, “I got there because of what I have, not who I am. And not even that, I got there because of what it looks like I have. They think I’m some kind of rich kid ‘cause I have a nice car, but we’re lucky we don’t live in the trailer park. They think I’m mowing my way through the cheerleading team because they’ve seen us talking before. Sure, maybe I’ve flirted with a few, but-” His face darkens in frustration, nose scrunching slightly, “On the weekends, my dad makes me do shit around the house. And on the weekdays, I’m looking after my sister.” 

You don’t point out his slip-up, how in a fit of passion he’s dropped the ‘step-’. It’s nice to hear.

“I have no time to sleep around,” He chuckles darkly, disdainfully, “Not often. But because people like me, or- or like what they think of me, they just assume I’m selling myself out for it.”

“It’s bullshit,” He concludes, huffily so, “It’s all bullshit. And it’s not gonna last past high school.”

A tense silence falls over the car after he’s finished speaking. You suppose you shouldn’t be surprised anymore, not after two days of emotional curveballs from the man, but you think it might be the most you’ve ever heard him speak.

He looks nervous, fiddling with the keys in his ignition. Before he can regret opening up, you reach out to take his hand, pulling it away from the keys and linking yours into it on his thigh.

“I’m glad I’m your friend, Billy.” You confess, equal parts honest and tender. You want the words to soak into his veins, flow through his bloodstream and bloom sweet blossoms inside that light up his dark world.

“Me too,” He breathes, eyes glued to your intertwined hands as he tightens his fingers into the grip. As if on cue, the movie screen lights up, and it’s just barely dark enough outside to see the film.

“Here we go,” You settle in your seat, keeping your hand securely in his own, “Popcorn?”

Billy uses his free hand to pass the bucket over, and you can feel the heat concealed by the thick paper bucket hovering just above your hands. You munch on the buttery snack, a kernel already lodged in your teeth.

To Billy’s slight disinterest, it’s an old romance movie. He should have known, all that ever plays at these movie marathon nights are romances and beach flicks. He has a fleeting thought that he’d rather be watching women in bikinis, but it seems like something he shouldn’t think while holding your hand, so he pushes it away and tries to focus on the grainy, black-and-white footage. 

The transatlantic accents and over-dressed main characters only hold his attention for a few minutes. But he’s family to Neil Hargrove, and he knows how to tune out a boring speech. He focuses more on the warmth that your hand pushes against his, sweet and soft and soothing like the blanket he used to get tucked in under at his grandma’s house. His grandma who knitted that blanket herself, just for him, and who slipped him strawberry sweets anytime his dad got too drunk to notice. And the way you hold his hand feels just like his mother used to, with her thumb stacked on his so that she could stroke it like you’re doing now. He’s only held his dad’s hand a few times, and he’s not able to remember much. He just remembers his mom had always dropped Neil’s hand in a big dramatic fashion, claiming that it was like holding a dead fish.

There’s nothing morbid about holding your hand, though. You’re not stiff and cold like his father, your fingers curve around his and mold to his skin. You not only reciprocate, you initiate, squeezing at a funny line or brushing over the back of his hand.

You’re all the best parts of the people he’s loved, and none of the bad parts of the ones he couldn’t. If he was any sleazier, he’d ask if it hurt when you fell from heaven.

You let out a particularly sweet laugh at a scene and the sound takes him back to only a few nights ago, sitting on his bed and feeling safe. He’d actually forgotten about his father until the man had stormed his bedroom, and he marvels at how you’d managed to suck the terrible thoughts from his head. 

Your study session puts mitosis in his mind. Then biology, and he wonders if there’s ever been two organisms more compatible with each other. Personally, he thinks your biology is pretty basic: you were made for him, and he was made for you. 

He’s broken out of his scientific reverie when your head falls to his shoulder. You throw a quick glance up at him through your lashes, silently begging for permission for something you’ve already done. His heart thuds in his chest as he watches you with curious eyes, and a slow nod of his head is all you need to settle against his side. You’re at an awkward angle, side arched over the center console to get your head to his shoulder. That makes it better, Billy thinks, that you had to work for it. It means you really mean it, that you’re not just doing it because it’s convenient. You’re loving him because you want to.

“Shitty movie,” Billy grumbles, his voice hoarse from its prolonged silence.

“Good popcorn,” You hum, reaching for another piece. Billy leans down to snatch it out of your hand with his teeth, and chews it with a growing grin as you chuckle. 

“You’re a monster,” You tease, and a word that his brain usually whispers at him past midnight, loathing in his thoughts and venom in his veins, becomes nothing more than a nickname.

He thinks he wants to be your monster if it makes you laugh like that, all teasing teeth and careful manhandling.

You’re almost afraid you’ve insulted him with the title until he leans his head against yours, neck bent at an angle. His ear is pressed to the crown of your head, and just in case he can hear your thoughts, you think extra hard: I love you.

You last longer than Billy had, but you lose interest in the film, too. It’s not that it’s boring, it’s just not particularly interesting, and your brain is moving too slow for you to concentrate on careful dialogue. Apparently, the excitement of the day has caught up with you. Your eyes are starting to droop, and you think Billy might be able to feel your lashes flutter against his bicep. If he can, he doesn’t say anything, he just stays curled around you in his seat.

Slowly, second by second, minute by minute, you fall asleep. You drift away from the world and all that remains is Billy’s arm against your cheek, his hand holding yours. You don’t know if you’re fully sleeping or not, all you know is that Billy is the one constant between your life and your dreams.

Billy feels your breathing even out, the soft puffs of air that hit his arm soft and consistent. It’s the last thing he wants to do, but he lifts his head to peer at your face, seeing that you are, in fact, asleep.

He has the strongest urge in the world to kiss your forehead. He doesn’t, half because he’s scared you’ll wake up and think he’s a creep, and half because he’s not sure he’s capable of loving back. He’s taking it slow, and he’ll stick with leaning his head on you. 

He does that until the movie’s almost over, and the romantic climax is shining on the screen.

The woman has fallen asleep on the man’s shoulder. They’re not in a car, they’re on a park bench, but her nose is nudged up against his bicep, too, and their hands are intertwined.

The man reaches up to her cheek, and so does Billy.

His hand is warm and slightly rough against the soft skin of your cheek, but it’s his warm breath against your face that wakes you. Your lashes flutter open, and the only thing you can see are Billy’s pretty blue eyes. You’re almost startled, almost caught off-guard, and then you notice the dark flecks of insecurity in them, ridged between peaks of blue like ocean waves. 

He can’t speak. He’s paralyzed, eyes unblinking against your own, unable to ask, to tell, to beg. All he can do is stare, and hope that his hand isn’t shaking against your cheek.

He licks his lips, and you know what he’s trying to muster up the courage to do.

“Billy,” You breathe, soft and careful, “Are you sure?”

He manages to hum questioningly, but it’s a choked sound from somewhere deep in his throat.

“You’re speeding again,” You let out a breathy chuckle, but you raise your hand to hold his to your face, “Is this because you want me or because you think you’ll never get the chance to have me again?”

“I want you,” Billy murmurs, and the man on screen echoes his sentiments.

The woman on screen leans in, and so do you.

The kiss you share is unlike anything Billy’s ever felt. What he’s used to is prodding tongues, nipping teeth, below-the-belt grabbing, but this is new. This is the soft, dewy sweetness of lips barely touching, and the watermelon balm spread over your mouth. It’s tender in the way that you hold his hand to your cheek, and only made more so by the fact that you’re still holding hands between the seats. It’s less of an active kiss and more of an embrace, lips holding each other in place and noses bumping.

Billy’s never felt safer letting his eyes drift shut. At night there’s always the possibility that his dad will unlock the door in the middle of the night and take out insomnia-fueled rage on him. In his car he’ll get arrested for loitering. Now there’s nothing but you, and that’s all he ever wants there to be.

There’s muted claps from the other cars around you as the movie ends, and you choose to attribute the closing scene of fireworks to your kiss and not the leads’. When you draw away it’s with soft, content sighs, awestruck and breathless.

“I want you too, Billy.” You vow, more than happy to let him know he’s loved, “I’m glad we didn’t go to the front office.”

“Me too,” Billy breathes, leaning in to brush his lips against yours one last time, just holding them there as his fluttering eyes stare into yours.

The sound of revving engines breaks you out of your trance, and Billy pulls away from your face to look over your head. He’s still got his hand on your cheek, and you’re cradled to his chest as he watches everyone around you disperse.

“Let’s head home,” You murmur into his collarbones, kissing the skin there chastely, “You can stay the night at my house again, if you want.”

“I should get home,” He admits reluctantly, “My dad is probably still freaked about last night.”

“I wish you didn’t have to go back,” You hum, tracing the outline of a bandage through his shirt against his stomach.

“Me too,” He sighs, and finally lets your face go when the overhead lights to the lot flick on, “But we’ll get out soon.”

“Oh? Where are we going?” You settle back in your seat, turning to face him with curious eyes.

“California,” He smiles, and his genuine one is a breathtaking sight, “And anywhere you want to stop along the way.”

“That sounds perfect,” You sigh happily, head leaning comfortably back against the headrest. A yawn breaks through your lips and scrunches up your face, and Billy has to fight himself so that he doesn’t pull over and kiss the lines near your mouth.

The silence in his car is peaceful now, serene. There’s nothing left unsaid anymore, nothing hidden in your eyes and nothing withheld in your touches. You drift off to sleep wishing you were still holding Billy’s hand, and when you wake up, you are.

“Hey,” He whispers, squeezing your hand where his is interlocked with it, “Hey, wake up. You’re home now, we’ve gotta get you inside.”

“Hm? Oh,” You hum, bleary eyes taking in the outline of your house against the harsh beams of Billy’s headlights. “Thanks, Billy.”

“Uh-huh,” He nods, offering you a hand after you undo your seatbelt, “C’mon, if you can stand, I’ll carry you up to bed.”

You;re more than happy to let him sweep you off of your feet. He can feel your smile as you bury it in his neck, and he doesn’t even worry about shutting his car off and locking it before he pushes open your front door. Sure enough there’s tinfoil covered dinner on the counter alongside a note from your parents, and Billy marvels at how well they take care of you even when they’re not home. 

“To the right,” You instruct him, realizing he’s only ever gotten into your room from the window outside, “And it’s the second door down.”

“Got it,” He murmurs, chin bumping your cheek.

Your bed is still unmade from that morning, and he yearns to slip beneath the covers again. He’s jealous when he tucks you in, and you’re glad you wore comfy clothing to school so that you can burrow under your blankets and not worry about changing.

“Goodnight,” Billy leans down, an inch away from your face, “Can I…?”

You lean up to do it for him, pushing your lips against his once more.

He melts into it, and the way that your nails scratch the hair at the base of his scalp only makes it worse.

“Goodnight,” You mumble, words wonky and misspoken against his lips, “I had fun today, Billy. I’m glad we’re friends, and I’m glad we’re more.”

“Me too,” He agrees, and the sentiments he’s agreeing to feel foreign to him. Five days ago he’d have been the least likely person on earth to have a friend, and now he’s got a partner to boot. In every sense of the word, he loves you, even if he won’t say those three words yet.

“Please be safe,” You cup his cheek, stroking over his slightly bruised cheekbone with tenderness he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to, “And if he hurts you again, stay with me instead.”

“I will,” Billy promises, dotting a dewy kiss to the side of your mouth as you settle into sleep, content with his safety.

He tells himself he’s just puttering around, throwing a stray sock into the laundry hamper and straightening a book he’d nearly knocked off of your nightstand on the way in. But really he’s waiting to make sure you’re really asleep, ring already slipped off of his finger and growing sweaty in his palm.

Once he’s sure you won’t wake, he peels back the covers on your bed, taking your hand in his. It’s got a familiar weight to it, a fact that he mentally celebrates, and his fingers shake as he slides the metal band onto your finger.

Having a ring to chuck in the garbage is gonna hurt a whole lot more when they leave, he reminds himself. Then, ‘If’.

“If they leave.” Your soft voice rings in his ears, and as he treks back to his car, revving the engine in the silvery light of the moon, there’s a feeling he’s never felt before rising in his chest. Hope: “Some people stay.”

reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated! your feedback motivates me to write more, so thank you for your support :-)