Bnha X Reader Oneshot - Tumblr Posts

Mistakes and consequences

Dabi x reader

Category: smut

Warnings: dub-con, mouth-fucking, throat-fucking, slight choking, cheating, Dabi being an asshole.

***

You woke up from a hard pounding in your head. It felt as if someone was hitting it with a hammer.

You slowly lifted your head up from a dirty pillow, shivering. A big t-shirt was the only thing covering your bare body.

Your throat was as dry as a desert. You needed to get some water. You wondered wherever Hawks was already at work or not.

That's when it hit you. It wasn't your or Hawks's aparment. It wasn't your bed either.

The hand that had snaked up its way around your waist, and the chest your back was pressed against wasn't Hawks's either.

Suddenly feeling light-headed, you almost jump from your position. But the hand kept you steady in your place.

You felt as if your heart was going to jump from your chest. Literally. A scream was stuck somewhere in your throat, so all you were able to do is let out a small whimper.

"Why so fast to leave, doll?" a low, painfully familiar voice broke the silence.

Your eyes quickly trailed up the hand still holding your waist. Metal staples holding the scarred skin and normal, slight tanned flesh together could only belong to one person.

Dabi.

You knew him as a friend of Hawks and of course, an infamous villain with a kill count probably higher than he count of people he had fucked. Maybe not.

Why were you in one bed with Dabi? Why were you with Dabi, in the first place?

Trying to remember what lead you to this stupid, rom-com situation you were in, you desperately tried to recall what happened last night.

Nothing.

It felt as if someone wiped your head sparkly clean, leaving not one memory from last night's events.

You needed answers, but first, you needed to get away from him. The way his hand was so posessively holding you made you shiver. It almost felt dirty.

"Let me go." you demanded, trying to hide the way your voice quivered.

He surprisingly complied and you finally turned to face him, receded to now sitting at the edge of the bed.

"Why am I here? Does Hawks have something to do with this? Did we-"

You looked him up and down. He was sitting up with his hands at the back of his head, enjoying himself.

Dabi's face lit up in amusement, the glint in his electric blue eyes letting you understand that he had all the answers. He looked like he was watching a lottery, while knowing all the lucky numbers.

"One question at a time, wouldn't want me to get too tired to answer them, right?"

You took a deep breath, trying to contain yourself from calling him an asshole.

"Why am I here?" you finally asked, tone calmer than last time.

Dabi's smirk got wider, almost making you afraid that his staples would pop off.

"You called me last night, crying." he answered, pausing as if he wanted to tease you.

"Why?" you asked, frowning.

"Apparently Hawks was busy with his hero shit on your anniversary and you felt lonely. "

Oh... Oh.

Focusing, you could remember calling him, but it felt like the memory was surrounded by mist. Damn, were you really so desperate that you called like, the least comforting person you knew?

"And then?"

Dabi was letting the story unfold slowly, not saying everything at once, finding some kind of fun in taunting you.

"You came to my place. Hugged me, got my jacket all wet with your tears, the usual."

He was hinting to the one time you got your leg hurt and he had to carry you home, while you tried to contain your tears from spilling. Obviously, you failed, but he never failed to remind you of that.

"Well, that doesn't explain why I'm in your bed with only a shirt on." you scoffed, looking at the shirt. It wasn't yours and was a tad too big, almost like a really short dress.

Dabi tilted his head, eyebrows raised.

"Isn't it obvious?

You had one guess, but oh god, were you praying to the skies above that it wasn't correct.

Not getting an answer from you he cleared his throat, cocky smirk still apparent, and then voiced your worst fear:

"You got drunk and we fucked."

You eyes were as wide as plates, hands trembling, trying to catch your breath.

No, no. This couldn't be true.

"Why," your voice trembled. "Why didn't you stop me, if I was drunk? You know that I'm with Hawks-"

Dabi sat up, eyeing you up and down. It made you want to puke. Cheating was the lowest low you could hit.

"Found ya entertaining, desperate to be fucked by someone better than your shitty hero."

The shirt, that was obviously his, now felt like it was burning your skin.

"I thought we were friends."

His eyes went wider as a husky laugh left his throat.

"Friends? Well, we're friends with benefits now, then."

Your head was heavy, heart thumping loudly. You were so disguisted with yourself. Hawks... How could you do something like this to him?

You needed to leave.

Quickly standing up from the bed, you found your panties beside it and quickly slid them on, thankful that his shirt covered your ass.

Dabi watched with curiousity as you collected your clothes, scattered all over the floor.

"Where’re you going?"

You lifted your head up to meet his mesmerizing blue gaze.

"Home. Where else?"

"You gonna tell Hawks that we fucked?"

Your cheeks turned red. He could've just not told you. You only remembered fragments of what has happened, anyways. In your mind, you could've fully believe that this was just another night with Hawks.

You debated wherever you should or shouldn't tell Hawks about it. One part of you wanted to tell him, because you didn't keep any secrets from each other. But your selfish part wanted to keep quiet, fearing that Hawks would leave you when you told him.

"No." you finally responded, after finding your phone. It had six missed calls and about 6 messages. You only read 'Text me back as soon as you see this' from Hawks, before turning it off.

"Then I'm gonna tell him." sighed Dabi, throwing a blanket off of himself and standing up. He was shirtless, only wearing gray sweatpants. You could clearly see an outline of his boner through them and you quickly turned away.

Where was he going with this? If someone told Hawks about this, that person would most definitely be you.

"He's not gonna believe you." you hissed, turning away to finally go, but Dabi caught your wrist with a smile.

"Dabi-"

Wordessly, he fished his phone out of the pocket and quickly unlocking it and played a video.

"What's-"

"Watch." Dabi demanded, pushing his phone into your hands.

You rolled your eyes and then finally saw what was going on.

No...

Right before your eyes was your own face, loud moans slipping away from your lips in a room filled with sound of skin slapping skin. Your naked chest covered in white substance, bounced with every thrust.

"Harder..."

Your own voice betrayed you and your hands started shaking.

"What's that, doll?" ringed Dabi's voice.

"Fuck me harder, Dabi!'" your lust filled moans loudly rang through your head.

You quickly paused the video, pressing delete, but before you could press 'ok', Dabi grabbed his phone out of your trembling hands.

You were so fucked.

"You want wing-hero to see this, dollface?" His words seemed far away. "You want him to hear you screaming?" Dabi was now leaning against you, his arms snaking up your waist and reaching your chest as lewd words came out as whispers, hot against your ear "You want him to know how good I fucked you?"

"No!" you snapped out of your trance to step away from him, resulting in a chuckle from black-haired man.

"Then you have to do me a favour, doll,"

You considered just... letting him send Hawks the video, but your selfish side won. You had no one else except Hawks. No one could ever love you like he did, and you really didn't want to lose it.

"What are you talking about?"

Dabi tapped one of his long fingers against his chin, as if he was thinking.

"A good blowjob and we're even."

You stepped back, eyes now wide.

"I'm not sucking your fucking cock!"

Dabi turned his phone to you. It was his chat with Hawks, the video about to be sent.

"Do you want me to send it?" he asked, voice growly.

"No..." you whispered.

"What's that?"

"No!"

Smile returned to his face. He knew you would agree.

If you thought what you did was low now, you now fell even lower.

"Get on your knees." he barked.

You complied by getting on your knees, trying to think about something else. The floor was hard and cold so you tried to draw your attention to that.

"Don't worry, babe, I'll be gentle." Dabi grinned and you tried not to puke.

Yes, he was attractive, hot even, but you were really just thinking of what kind of manipulative asshole he was and how you got yourself into this, willingly.

His pulled down his sweatpants, cock already hard. Your eyes widened. He was so much bigger than Hawks. You didn't know how he expected you to take him.

Dabi paused, his dick a few centimetres from your closed lips.

"Suck." growled Dabi.

You slowly opened your mouth, licking the pre-cum off of the tip of his dick. Starting to take him into your mouth slowly, as the small of your tongue was lapping down the underside of his cock.

Dabi hissed, tilting his head back. You felt dirty, just plain dirty.

You were bobbing your head slowly, trying to not take all of his dick in, just enough that it didn't hit the back of your throat. The last thing you wanted right now was gagging on Dabi's cock.

Dabi, on the other hand, had other thoughts. You panicked, as he slid his big hands into your hair, gripping handfuls.

You knew what would come next.

Dabi jerked your head forward, making you choke.

"That's right," he breathed out, You turned your eyes down, praying for all of this to be over soon.

Dabi started thrusting faster, going deeper with every desperate thrust, making you gag.

Maybe you were just stupid to think that Dabi would let you go at your own pace.

His pace was becoming too fast to keep up with. Your lungs were burning from the lack of air.

"Look into my eyes," he grunted, fucking your mouth harder. You didn't comply so one of his hands found it's way on your neck. Panicking, you raised your gaze to look to his smirking face.

His hand still gripped your neck harder, as if he didn't care about anything. Seeing the outline of his cock on your throat, he found it amusing choking you.

You felt lightheaded from the lack of air and Dabi's thrusts were becoming even more erratic.

He would finish soon.

As you already saw black dots at the corners of your eyes, Dabi tilted his head back, thrusting one more time and then spilling his cum into your mouth. White, silky strings coated the inside of your throat.

That fucking asshole, oh my god, you were going to kill him. WHO THE FUCK COMES INTO YOUR MOUTH WITHOUT CONSENT?

Dabi laughed, seeing the way your eyes just radiated anger.

The black-haired man pulled so you, breathing deeply and thankful to finally catch your breath, were ready to spit it out. Dabi quickly grabbed your jaw, shutting your mouth up.

"Swallow."

You shook your head, and he just tilted his head.

"We're doing this the hard way, huh?"

Two of his long fingers pinched your nose, cutting all the air supply you had. You tried to back away, but one of his hands was still gripping your hair.

You waited, till you couldn't take it anymore. Burying your pride, you unwillingly swallowed his load, feeling the disgusting taste.

"Good girl," he laughed and let go of your nose, letting you catch your breath once again, pulling his pants up.

"Can I go now?"

"Yeah. You could've gone home before that too. But thanks for staying." he laughed, winking.

You stood up and took all your stuff, not wanting to look him in the eyes.

"'Till next time. Call me when the hero treats you bad again."

You didn't bother answering him, just quickly getting out of his dirty apartment, loudly shutting the door.

Dabi laughed, falling back to his messy bed and then taking his phone to go back to the chat with Hawks and pressing 'send'.

Oh man, this was fun.

***

Huge thanks to @velvet-kissesss for proof-reading and correcting my mistakes! ❤️🥺

A.n

Ahh man this was fun to write and my first attempt to write nsfw, so don't judge me too hard 😂😂 I feel like I need like six showers to not feel dirty after writing this :D

If u have any requests/prompts send them to my ask box!! ❤️❤️

Katsuki Bakugou x reader

Category: angst, fluff

Warnings: cursing

A.N This was originally supposed to be done much sooner, but i'm just lazy like that, so here u go. Huge thanks to @velvet-kissesss for editing this so fast!! 🥰🥰

*~~~~*~~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*

You tried to look away from the mirror, from your reflection that reminded you of everything that was going to happen just a moment later.

You focused on the wallpaper - blue hues were painted into the shape of waves that looked as if they crashed here, forever trapped in one moment. You couldn't help but feel the same, trapped in a moment that you couldn't escape.

You took in the view of the creaky old floor with an expensive yet tattered pattern of golden flowers. Your eyes drank in the view of small rays of sunshine that seem to bounce from one place to another.

As much as you wanted to avoid it, your body seemed to betray you as you turned to fully face your reflection. You looked flawless. Although it was a true irony as it was the most miserable day of your life. A most miserable day yet, probably.

The strapless white dress was made from the softest of materials, it reached the floor and resembled dove wings while hugging your figure perfectly. A corset was adjusted to make your waist look impossibly thin but it only made your burning lungs even harder to fill with air.

Lifting your head up, you put two fingers on your tear ducts to try contain tears from spilling and ruining your too flawlessly done makeup.

You didn't want this. Any of this. You didn't ask to be born with a powerful quirk. You didn't ask to marry a man with quirk that was deemed 'compactable' with yours to make perfect, hero worthy babies when combined.

All you ever wanted was to finish U.A with the best grades and then become a hero. To save people, to help those in trouble and to always be an inspiration for heroes yet to be.

You blinked. Then blinked a few more times. Sorrow clouded your mind, making you relive your happiest memories on replay again and again, as if your mind wanted to torment you - to put 'that's what you're losing' right in your fucking face.

You reminisced about your first meeting with a certain blonde-haired boy. You recalled your first date, looked back on the first kiss and awkward first sex. Your searches for an affordable apartment for starting heroes like you two and your late night talks. Everything. Everything was bright and clear in your mind.

You hated them. You hated them for forcing you into this. You were powerful, hell, they wouldn't of been able to make you comply. That's what you thought at first but... when they threatened to hurt Katsuki, everything was done.

All the stubborness, all the mean things you had to say and an offer to shove that proposal up his ass was erased as if it never even crossed your mind.

You could marry a man you didn't love. You could learn to live with the constant dolor of letting go your dreams and your career that had just started. You were fine with leaving your old life behind as long as... as long as he was safe. You loved him so much it hurt sometimes. You loved him so much that you could give up everything for him.

It didn't matter. Not anymore at least. You couldn't change your mind right now. Not when there were only five minutes left until the ceremony started. Five minutes until you stepped out there all dolled up with a fake smile as his companion, waving and smiling to all these people that thought you truly loved the man you were marrying.

Your dress was like dove wings... Ironic how doves are meant to be free, free to go wherever they want. Yet here you were about to be trapped by a fancy ring on your finger and your own words 'I do'.

You counted the minutes. Your heart thumping harder with every tick of the clock, almost as if it was threatening to burst through your ribcage.

When there were only two minutes left and you were struggling to calm yourself, you heard a silent knock on the door.

At first, you thought the knock came from the front door of the room. It could’ve been someone already inviting you to go, but no. It was at the emergency escape door.

You couldn’t even get to the door, almost tripping on your shitty fancy dress on the way when the door burst open and hit the wall.

There he was as real as in your memories - blond hair messy refusing to stay in any other style, his signature skull shirt and black sweats on, stance intimidating, his whole body tense and ruby red eyes radiating nothing else but pure fury. Bakugou fucking Katsuki.

Seeing him made you question your eye sight or even more, sanity.

"Katsuki-" you managed to blurt out, feeling light-headed.

"We're leaving, get out of the stupid dress." he commanded, not explaining anything further, just tossing you a pair of sweats and a hoodie. Your sweats and hoodie.

"What-? Katsu, we can't just do that, I-"

He snickered, looking at the clock then looking back at you.

"You think I'm just going to let you give your life to some shitty extra with a powerful quirk, just because he and your parents want to?" he asked, arms that were in his pockets beginning to shake, his muscular arms tensed. "Over my dead fucking body, and I'm really hard to kill, princess." he managed to make something similar to a smile. "Now hurry, we don't want to cause a scene." With every word of his, you were more and more stunned.

"But... but they're going to hurt you if I don't do this! I would kill myself if anything happened to you because of me!" you said, clenching your clothes to your chest as you tried to keep your tears at bay.

"Deku will become the number 1 hero before they hurt me, babe."

You wanted to believe him. Oh god how you wanted to believe him.

Damn, what made you think he could be defeated at the first place? Who made you so sure that you could just give your life to someone you hated? Not for who they were, but for simply taking the right to make your own decision away from you.

Katsuki's look was quite unreadable. A mix of anger, re-assurance and confidence.

He raised his much bigger hand, taking your own into his to brush your hand lovingly with his thumb.

At that moment, you got all the confidence you wanted. He was your future. He was the one you loved the most and Bakugou was the one that made you braver. The one who made you say,

"Fuck it... Let's go."

His eyes lit up, a cocky smile finding its way to his face as if he knew that this would be your final choice from the start.

You turned, asking him to unzip the shitty, fancy dress but the feeling of his hand on your back almost made you break into sweat. This was wrong.

This was dangerous. You stripped out of the dress, the smooth, expensive material falling to the ground as if was a useless piece of fabric made for cleaning the floor. It felt satisfying as if you had nothing to worry about anymore. As if it was the only burden that kept you from running away from your own wedding.

You sighed, your mind running so wildly in your head almost making it hurt. You knew that this was gonna end up badly but here you were, letting him untie the ribbons of the corset and finally being able to take full breaths while watching him throw it to the other side of the small dressing room.

"These fucking assholes really just made you wear that fucking shit? It looks like it could crush your fucking ribs." he commented, frowning.

Your heart fluttered in your chest, a slight sigh of relief escaping your lips knowing that the corset didn’t make you any more attractive to Bakugou.

You slipped on your sweats before Bakugou made you turn to him, looking you up and down, making your face flush red since you were standing just in your sweats and lacy white bra.

"So you put this fancy shit bra on just for that asshole?" he asked, hues of hurt and jealousy painting his voice a different color than what you were used to. “Were you planning to have sex with him?” he asked, tone as casual as if he was asking what was for dinner tonight. Still, the way his teeth were subtlety clenched made what he was feeling clear.

"Ah, I-"

Warm arms circled around your body, pulling you close against his heaving chest as you could feel the slight tremble of his embrace but didn’t say anything about it, not wanting to make him feel worse than he already felt.

You closed your eyes, wanting to stay like that. Not bothering about the time.

Katsuki littered your jawline with unusually soft kisses, tracing shapes onto the small of your back in calming motions.

His lips trailed down your neck, soft and loving pecks turned into a passion that would definitely leave a mark. You tilted your head back, giving Katsuki better access as you softly caress his hair, tugging it caused him to groan.

When he was so close you could smell the lingering smell of caramel filling all your senses, making him feel so real.

Your breaths were sharp and short and suddenly he bit down, making you gasp but he swallowed all your protests by putting his lips on yours with teeth softly biting your bottom lip, demanding entrance.

You immediately parted your lips, letting his tongue explore your mouth to fill it with the lingering taste of sweet rum he must’ve drank earlier, making your head dizzy.

His hands explored your waist, one going up to caress your clothed breast.

You buried your fingers deeper in his surprisingly soft hair, tugging it, making the kiss even deeper as your tongues were fighting for dominance. Neither of the two wanted to give each other the satisfaction of winning.

The need to breathe was pushed to the back of your mind, afraid that if you let go, everything you had at this moment will shatter. A lingering feeling of irrational fear made you afraid to open your eyes.

Finally, you two parted with string of saliva that connected your lips still it broke. You could almost hear him murmur a quiet ‘i love you’ in his usual gruff voice.

The dream you so desperately held on, the one that felt so real it made your heart throb, was broken by a loud ‘you may now kiss the bride’ from the priest. You could only catch the heartbroken gaze and bittersweet smile of Katsuki as you were kissed by a man you hated and the crowd broke into cheers.

You had the first dance, thanked all the people for congratulating you and cut the cake as you tried to look at your new husband as lovingly as possible. It was partly because of the look you had to keep up, but partly because you thought that if you imagined hard enough, you could almost pretend it was your Katsuki.

Soon you got tired of all the people and told your husband that you needed to get some fresh air.

It was already dark as you closed the door to the hall where the ceremony was held, escaping from everyone with only quieted down music that was the wouldn’t let you forget you about what was still happening inside.

The fact that there were no people out here made you feel lonely as you crept through the garden that was buried in the silent tones of some shitty pop song.

In distance you saw the small light of a lighter flicker and then the most handsome face, recognizable to the point it hurt, lit by a light of a cigarette.

With a few short strides you reached Bakugou. His expression was unreadable, top of his top unbuttoned and tie already untied.

“I thought you wouldn’t come.” you finally said, breaking the unbearable silence that lingered between you.

Katsuki let a line of smoke leave his mouth, looking you straight in the eyes,

“Yeah, I was surprised myself.”

Your gaze was turned downwards, almost in shame. You couldn’t look back into his ruby red eyes without a scorching red pain burning through every nerve of your body.

You didn’t say anything as you wrapped your hands around him, feeling him stiffen in your embrace. It almost made you jump back, your thoughts racing. Maybe he didn’t want to hug you. Maybe he didn’t want to even see you. Maybe-

That’s when he wrapped his arms around you in a protective manner, the smell of caramel with a hint of cigarette smoke taking you away. The feeling made yourself tear up.

Bakugou took a step back as soon as he felt your tears wet his shirt. You quickly tried to wipe every trace of them away, but he took the cigarette out of his mouth, stomping the butt and softly wiping your tears away with his thumb, his expression softening.

“Hey, hey, you okay?” his voice was so unusually soft it made you tear up all over again. You couldn’t answer his question. You were afraid that as soon as you spoke he would disappear all over again.

He softly took your face into his hands, his thumbs stroking the tear stained skin carefully.

“Y/N, please answer me.”

“Before he kissed me... before he kissed me I imagined you... we were kissing and you- you were so real and then-” you managed to whimper out before sobs rocked your whole body. Bakugou took you into his embrace, his arms wrapping around your body, one stroking the small of your back comfortingly. “You dissappeared. You said you’d run away with me and then- then you disappeared.”

Katsuki littered your skin with small kisses, making you wonder if the experience was real this time. It couldn’t be fake this time too, right? Everything felt far too real now, you could even hear the rhythmic sound of his heart thumping as he held you close.

“I’m real and I’m not going anywhere.” he assured, kissing the tip of your icy cold nose as you wrapped your trembling hands around his neck. “You said we wanted to run away in the dream you had, right?”

You managed to nod with the hot breaths of your lover tickling the skin of your neck.

“Well what if I told you that we can make that come true?”

Category: fluff

Warnings: none

Word count: 2,414

Summary: After a bad breakup, you find yourself in the embrace of your best friend and things escalate quickly after that. 

Your phone was ringing again. This would’ve been the tenth time in the last fifteen minutes. You chose to ignore it, not even checking who it was, because you were sure that it was your ex disturbing you at such an ungodly hour.

You opened your eyes, lids as heavy as bags full of rocks. Sunshine shone as bright as ever but even brighter than other days while the constant breeze was just perfect and kept it from getting too hot. Even the birds outside were chirping, reminding you that they existed at 5am. It seemed like the day was going to be perfect.

It took ten seconds, if not less, for that bubble to be blown. The sudden headache was terrible and your shirt was still wet from tears, meaning you fell asleep for half an hour at best, probably not even for that long.

A shiver ran up your spine - even on a warm morning like this one you needed a blanket to feel comfortable.

You almost gave in to the wish to stay in bed for a whole day, doing absolutely nothing except watching some stupid reality TV and gobbling down whole tub of ice cream. But you decided against that.

You were broken in every possible way after your breakup. You screamed, you doubted your decision, you got drunk and then cried some more.

You couldn’t let yourself be like that cliche heartbroken TV show character anymore. Four days in a row of crying enough to fill rivers and eating enough ice cream to last a whole decade. Today was the day you ended that self-loathing cycle.

Warmed by the sunlight which slipped into your bedroom through the big glass windows without any curtains, your feet touch the floor.

You tried to reassure yourself that everything was going to be fine but as soon as you stepped the first step, your feet landed on a dirty lid of ice cream tub. Cussing out loudly, you hopped to the bathroom like you were playing classes or hopscotch.

After discarding your ice cream and tear stained pyjamas into an already full laundry basket, you relaxed into the bath. Setting the water temperature just right instantly made you feel better.

Warm water released the tension from your muscles and left you feeling so relaxed. You lay there for what felt like hours until a different ringtone was coming from your bedroom.

With a towel around your naked form, you made your way to the phone being careful not to step on any more lids.

The phone vibrated in your hand, the screen flashing with the name “ALIEN QUEEN xoxo” and picture of your best friend smiling widely while showing peace signs with both hands.

Without hesitation, you picked up.

“You finally picked up!” screamed Mina and you had to move phone a few inches from your ear, afraid that it will make you deaf.

Mina definitely had no such thing as inside voice, “I was scared!”

Oh, so that was the person that was calling you. Well, you were dumb to except your ex to actually give a fuck about you.

Hearing the tone of her voice full of worry made guilt shoot up your body. You could bet your ass that there were like 20 missed calls from her.

Shifting your weight from one leg to another, you listened to her ranting and scolding you like a child. You paced a few steps forward and back. To this day you couldn’t figure out why you couldn’t just sit still while speaking on your phone. It was truly a mystery that science couldn’t explain.

“Are you even listening to me?” Mina asks after a few moments of silence.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry, I’m just...” you swallowed, breath hitching in your throat,

“My emotions are still all over the place” you explain, now observing your reflection in a dirty spoon you found on the table.

“You okay?” she asks with concern clear in her voice.

“I’ll be fine. Finally took a shower to not to look like a hot pile of trash anymore.”

Mina laughs and you feel a smile creeping up your face.

“Still hot, though,” she teases, “You wanna come to my place, watch a bunch of shitty movies and finally get over that asshole?” You can hear her smile and unintentionally smile wider yourself.

An answer leaves your lips way before you think through with it:

“Hell yeah!”

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

Neon red lights in Mina’s living room casted weird shadows on the bright pink walls, making you even more dizzy than you already were.

Loud music was blasting while you swung your hips and moved your free hand (the other one was busied by a champagne glass) to the rhythm as the lyrics were blurring in your mind.

In the neon red light Mina looked like death, or, more like, deathly stunning. From the way she danced so passionately to the music, how her free hand constantly buried itself in her soft pink hair and to the way that her sparkly mini-dress hugged her toned yet soft body.

Hell, you didn’t know if it was the alcohol messing with your head or the pain of broken heart that was begging to be healed by anyone. You really weren’t that against anyone being that hot.

Mina grinned, white pearly teeth hugged by plush, glossy lips. Her eyes were half-lidded as her hand reached out to you, as if she was trying to pull you into her with some invisible power.

You felt like a mortal about to be seduced by a goddess.

“Dance with me?”

Maybe it was her invisible power, because soon your hands were on her waist with her own resting on your neck. One hand was running up and down your back as you both struggled to spin to the rhythm of the fast song.

You leaned closer to her, laying your head on her shoulder. Her hot breath burned like fire against your skin, sending shivers up and down your body.

She smelled like vanilla and fancy perfume and you felt as if you had been spellbound, closing your eyes and letting the moment carry you away.

Songs changed but two of you stayed in the same position. It was only your hand constantly reaching to touch her hair and Mina giggling from time to time, whispering words that you couldn't quite catch.

This was probably very wrong. Not the dancing, no, you were best friends but the thoughts you were having about Mina were wrong. Blaming the alcohol for mixing up your thoughts and your mental state after the breakup, you closed your eyes. Letting the music carry you. Letting yourself have no thoughts even if it was just for a second.

“Hey,” you raised your head, Mina gently brushed a strand of hair out of your face. She paused for a moment as if she wanted to do something more with her half-lidded mascara smudged eyes. You couldn’t read her expression, “Want to watch a movie?”

You didn’t really want that, but you hoped that after sitting down for awhile you‘d feel better. Or at least get these inappropriate thoughts that were clouding everything out of your head.

The neon lights were turned off as if that the party was over, and Mina turned on some channel on her huge tv. You weren't surprised about pricy, fancy stuff around her place anymore as she assured you that 'Hero work pays.'

“What do you want to watch?" you asked, trying to find a comfortable position on her bright pink sofa, littered with what seemed like at least a hundred pillows.

Mina mindlessly flipped through the channels with apathetic look painted on her face.

Then, she stopped.

"Oh, 'There's Something About Mary' is on!" Mina turns to you with a smile as bright as always on her face, "Have you ever seen it?"

You nodded of course. It was one of those rom-coms that was on tv quite often that you liked. You found the story of a hopeless geek still pining after his high school crush, funny and it was a good laugh from time to time.

"Great, then let's watch it!"

You were about fifteen minutes into the movie when Mina began to wriggle closer to you.

"Mind me?" she asked, as she delicately laid her head on your lap.

You felt your breath hitch again in your throat, swallowing, to not let your voice waver.

"No, no," you stuttered out, "Not at all."

She flashed you one of those dazzling smiles and went back to watching the movie.

You tried not to be so tense, but it was as if your body didn't want to listen to your commands.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn't even realise the ending credits playing.

"You know, I really don't like that plot about many guys pinning after one girl," Mina began, mindessly playing with the hem of your shirt, "But there's one quote in there that is basically my life motto, 'Who needs him? I’ve got a vibrator!'" she said those words with such enthusiasm, that you couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah."

You could almost ignore her slender fingers flushed against your hot skin. God, was it always so hot in this room?

It was so silent for a moment. You could hear your own heartbeat ringing in your ears.

Then she leaned closer. It seemed that she wanted to tell you something, a secret that was so sacred, that only you were allowed to know. As if curiosity got the better of you, you leaned in, forgetting the quote 'curiosity killed the cat', and then realised hat you were fully ready to endure that secret, as one would endure the pleasure of cold ice cream on a cold summer day.

Lips danced plush against each other, teeth clacking at the raw, sudden contact. You cought Mina's eyes widening, as if she wasn't expecting your response to this kiss.

All you could taste was mint gum. The smell of vanilla was so close, too. Not close enough.

Pushed by blinding desire and alcohol, your hands cupped her soft face, one running down her soft cheeks, not believing the texture as silky as that could be of someone's face and another found its way to her hair, pulling her even closer.

Colors and hues of emotions danced inside you, blue for the color of her dress and the sadness of your own mixed thoughts, yellow for the lingering smell of vanilla and your worry and red for the passion and that dangerous neon hue. That was her — stunning and absolutely deathly.

The need of oxygen made you pull away, only for a moment to catch a few deep breaths. Then you were grabbing her face again, pulling her in, feeling her already bruised lips with her own.

Mina moaned into the kiss, and after hesitating for a moment but getting assurance by the sudden soft pull at her hair, she let her hand travel under your shirt.

You let her do that as your own hands were lingering on her defined waist, hugged by the midnight blue mini-dress.

A soft bite to her lip before pulling away and then before you realised it, it turned into a full make out session.

It was perfect at that moment — like a shot out of a movie but then the bubble you were in broke. And you fell.

Mina pulled away, not letting you lean in again as her hands finding their way to her sides, almost shamefully.

A questioning look painted your features. You were confused. It all felt so good, why did you have to stop?

"...This is wrong," she managed to speak out, pushing you away.

You felt something sting inside.

"I don't follow, what do you mean?"

Mina sighed, standing up. It seemed that she wanted to add more distance between the two of you.

"Have you ever dated a girl, Y/N?"

"...No."

"Well, I have. I dated too many straight girls, who were just experimenting for fun. Enough of them. Enough of tearing my own heart out,"

The volume of her voice gradually grew and her hands crossed against her chest.

"But, Mina-"

"You're drunk, Y/N," she answered, not looking at you, "It'll be best if you pick your stuff up and leave."

Your hands were clutched against your chest, heart beating as if it wanted to leave your body.

"Mina..."

You stepped closer and she stepped back, still not looking at you.

Tears stung your eyes, but you refused to let them fall.

"I always felt as if we were connected more than friends and then you started dating guy, after guy, after guy," Mina murmured, almost too quiet to hear, "And my high hopes were stomped. I realised there's no happy endings for girls who fall for straight girls, Y/N. No happy ending for girls like myself."

"It's not like that-"

Tears fell down her face when she finally looked up. Somehow, it hurt more than when she screamed at you.

"Go home, Y/N!"

"We can-"

"Go home, for fuck's sake! You're drunk, go home!"

Everything went fast after that when you let your clouded mind lead you back to your place, back to your bed. You didn't get any sleep that night.

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

Ring. Ring. You bit your lip, praying that she would just pick up.

Ring. Ring.

Ring.

You sighed, moving the phone away from your ear, ready to press the red button until you heard a groggy voice.

"Y/N?"

You breathed.

"...Yeah."

You heard her sigh, as you felt your own body tense up.

"What do you want?"

You bit your lip harder, almost drawing blood.

"Come over," your voice almost broke, "Please."

"And then what?.. You want me to tell you that I fell for another straight girl, right into your face? Wanna make tell me that ‘We can still be friends after that make-out session?’ Wanna-"

You didn't let her finish.

"None of that. You'll see."

"Y/N."

"Come over. Would be a pity to ruin a surprise I have for you."

There was silence for a second too long and you wondered if she ended the call.

"...'Kay."

You said your goodbye and threw the phone on the couch. You hoped she liked red roses, chocolate cake and one nervous girl, who thought she was definitely straight, but fell for so strongly for a girl.

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

A.n: Sorry for not posting anything in so long. Things have been pretty bad for me lately, but I hope you enjoyed this one-shot. Imma just dedicate it to the girl I have this stupid crush on ^^ 

As always, thanks @velvet-kissesss​ for editing and thank you all for reading!

Eijirou Kirishima x f!reader

Category: angst

Warnings: suicide (nothing graphic) slight cursing, mentions of sex under the cut

Word count: 2,881

Summary: Kirishima's journey of learning how to live without you and the fault he feels for your decision.

A.n: This is told from Kirishima's POV, the character Daichi is completly random and has nothing to do with bnha lol. Things have been... Kinda bad lately, so I guess it's my way of ranting. Hope ya'll like it!

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

There’s a few Astilbes in a tall vase on my bedside table. There’s this sweet smell coming from them, but it’s masked by the scent of a strong vanilla cologne.

It’s cold in the room because I can’t make myself get up to close the window, which lets ice cold air from the darkness to leak in.

I’m talking with her on the phone while wrapping the phone charger around my finger, untangling then twirling it again. My fingers remembered it as a routine during the hour we spent talking.

Even if her words are joyful, even if she’s talking about how’s school been and how she spent today studying at this super cute coffee shop with her friends, her voice feels heavy. Heavy with something she doesn’t want to show me. Something that she tries to hide under her stuttering laugh and stories.

But I’m not stupid. I can hear hints of pain stabbing her in the “It was fun” like sharp knives, and her “My new classmates are awesome!” covered by a mask of longing.

I want to help her, but my throat is dry and my tongue feels like it’s tied. I am held back by my own insecurities and doubts - I don’t want her to think that I’m an idiot or that I’m not minding my own bussiness.

“Eijirou? You still there?” she asks, oddly calm.

I wake up from my little trance. It seems like I got lost in the halls of my mind again. I feel a bit guilty. Did she tell me something important?

“Sorry, I got carried away for a second,”

There’s silence on her end of the line. A sigh soon rolls off the silence. I screwed up again.

“No, it’s okay. Nothing important.”

I hold my breath. What did she say? The smartest thing to do right now is just ask her-

“I will go now. Thanks for the convo, though,”

My teeth catch my bottom lip and I bite it. Idiot. I’m a fucking idiot.

There’s silence staying on the phone with me for a while until a quiet beep announces the call ending.

I couldn’t really sleep that night.

Somewhere near midnight, the line between sleep and search for comfort within the spots of the celling, in the stripes of the wallpaper or the folds of the blanket, blurs.

I don’t know when did I fall asleep but I think I saw angels, or maybe, just soft rays of sun, flooding into the room through curtainless windows.

I’m thinking about her. I’m thinking about how’s her day going and if she got any new opportunities to join a big agency.

Calendar on the wall shows that today is 11th of April, 2022.

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

Time as a pro-hero flies fast. Now I have a lot of problems, or maybe, just more than I had when I was at school. I don’t bother to remember the names or faces of people. Don’t want to.

Bakugou says that I’ve changed and that others are really worried, but I just bury myself in more work.

I can’t tell when a patrol starts and ends or the voices of villains and other heroes. It all blurs into one mess that lays on my shoulders like a dark cloud.

I come back home with an empty head and a full work shedule.

While I try to watch TV, not minding the buzzing on the other side of window and in my head, the bouquet of pink Camellias in the vase seem to stare at me.

I try not to mind themuntil a delicate petal falls on my arm. I don’t know how to keep flowers. Maybe I should stop buying them - they seem to not like my place.

I try to change the water, hoping that this would fix everything, and then I go back to mindessly watching tv.

I wait. Laying in my bed, a soft blanket wrapped around me as I desperately search for any warmth. I wait. Tick Tock.

Then there’s only one minute left of waiting and that minute soons ends as my phone rings, throwing me out of my endless thoughts.

“Hey!”

“Hello! How are you? How was hero work today?”

Her voice sounds different today. A lot brighter, like she has a smile on her face as she’s talking and I feel myself smiling too.

“It’s good, it’s good... Hero work is hard, as always. I’ve got a nasty case, dealing with some shitty drug dealers. It’d be better if you told me about your day.”

She stays quiet for a moment. It feels as if she’s holding her breath and, for a moment, I hold mine too. As if we’re underwater in our own safe bubble, where no one else can reach us.

“Everything’s very good. Great, even,” she finally answers and our bubble bursts.

“How did that audition go?”

“Uhm, I didn’t go.”

I frown, not even knowing what to say. She wouldn’t shut up about that audition, how the hero that ran it shared her opinions and ideals, how that place was just a dream, how-

“Why?” I trap all of my thoughts in that simple word.

“Just thought it wasn’t worth it,”

I wrap my finger around the phone charger and unwrap it again.

“Why?” I repeat my question again, dumbfounded.

“Dunno, maybe that place wasn’t that fit for me after all.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

After that silence follows. Then we talk some more about work, but it seems that conversation just doesn’t flow freely tonight. I drag it out like bubblegum that’s not meant to stretch this far.

“I’m coming back for a few days soon.”

I almost jump up. Don’t know if it’s from excitment or from shock. I haven’t seen her for a year.

“Wait, really?” I ask, finding it hard to believe.

“Yeah, and I have a huge favor to ask.”

“Anything.”

“Could I crash at your place while I’m here?”

My heart jumps with excitment. She’s more than welcome to stay. My heart aches just at the thought about an opportunity to see her.

I suddenly remember that she’s still waiting for my answer.

“Yeah sure! Just give me a message when you have the date set.”

She sighs with relief,

“You’re the best, Eijirou.”

The way she says my name makes a blush creep up my checks,

“Don’t mention it.”

“I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Okay.”

Just like that, the call ends and I’m left with pleasant silence. Tonight I don’t feel lonely.

The calendar shows 11th of April, 2023.

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

It’s a few weeks of waiting until she grants her promise. She stands at my door, more beautiful than ever and for a second, I doubt if that’s just a vision, but after she flashes one of her sunshine smiles I instantly know that she’s real. She’s there and she’s real.

I pull her into a tight embrace, burying my face in her hair. Words cannot describe how much I missed her.

I give her a bunch of red Chrysanthemums and I instantly knew it was worth getting to the flower shop so early in the morning - her smile lights up the room brighter than the sun ever could.

“I missed you, Eijirou,” the name rolls off her plump lips so softly. It gives me the feeling that if I do as much as breathe, I’ll shatter the moment.

We talk all day, watch some TV and then talk some more. The stars shine so bright tonight that we don’t even need lamps. It seems as if they’re enjoying our moment too.

She tells me countless stories and I want to hear each one of them over and over again, her voice makes me feel drunk off my mind.

She talks about struggling with living in a foreign country, about missing me and other friends, about everything that bothers her and I’m here to listen. Soon, I tell her all my secrets and we’re sitting in front of each other pulling away all of our lies.

I don’t know what events lead up to our next step. Truly, it’s all a blur and the only significant thing I can point out is the flowers, gently sitting in the tall glass vase.

We get rid of our clothes, the same way we got rid of our secrets just minutes ago. There’s nothing separating us now and we can and get drunk off each other’s bodies.

Making love with her is tender and sweet, with lots of praises and sweet nothings, she manages to whisper out.

I pause for a second, taking a moment to truly look at her and memorise every inch of her body. From the way her hair is draped on my pillow and her face is so calm, to the way her legs, wrapped around my waist try to pull me as close as possible.

We spend the night naked, flush against each other, finally free of everything. If only for a moment.

The calendar shows 14th of May, 2023.

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

When my phone rings again, I’m putting a bunch of yellow Zinnias into the vase. The flowers that I had before them have already wilted so I threw them away.

I sigh, expecting another call from her brother, who suddenly became worried about her like two weeks ago, or maybe someone from the former Bakusquad.

When I see her name on my phone I pick it up faster than I never knew I could.

“Eijirou...”

I haven’t heard her voice in so long, it almost feels surreal. I want her to repeat my name, slowly, so that could remember every syllable she says and repeat it on my mind forever.

“Is everything okay? I was so worried!”

Her voice cracks. I hear a quiet sniffle that she tries to hide.

“No, actually... No... I don’t like it there, I want to go home.”

All the other emotion in my body are conquered by pain. It’s so good to hear her, but it hurts so much to hear her voice is filled with sorrow I wished she would never experience. I want her to come back. I don’t care how selfish it is.

“I can’t... You know I can’t,”

I blink. I want to tell her, but my tongue feels heavy and all my words begin to slur.

I wake up with a jump. My shirt is flushed against my back and my whole body is covered in goosebumps. I snake my arms around myself, desperately seeking any kind of warmth.

My phone is turned off and the calendar shows 11th of April, 2024.

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

I put red and white striped Carnations in a vase. Flowers from before are dead, as always.

Work goes by the same as always and while I’m sitting down trying to finish tomorrow’s plans, I wait for a call.

Time goes by, but it doesn’t ring. Tick tock. She always calls at the same time.

She used to call at the same time, my mind corrects. I push that thought into the deepest part of my brain, never to be found again.

Tick tock. That’s how another hour goes by, filled with walking from one end of the room to the other and checking my phone again and again.

I don’t get a call.

The other three weeks are tense. The bags under my eyes are filled with darkness from staring at the windows during long, sleepless nights, searching for answers from the dark and dim stars. Answers that none of them want to give to me.

When I get a call, my clock shows that it’s almost 4am.

“Y/N?” I ask, my voice colored by hopeful hues. Droplets of sleep still hang on my lips.

“No, dude it’s Daichi.”

I grit my teeth. I’m not mad at him. I’m not mad at him for calling me, I’m not mad at him...

I’m mad because he’s not Y/N.

“Yeah?”

“I wanted to ask something about Y/N,”

“Eh?”

And what about her? For me to tell him what Y/N thought of him? To tell him that he was a bad brother? To tell him that his sister left because his family sucks?

“You’re her best friend.”

“Was.”

“What?”

“Was her best friend.”

“Yeah...”

“And?”

“And you.. Well you... Well she probably told you...”

“She didn’t,”

My answer is cold and what would put an end to this conversation.

“She... didn’t?”

He obviously doesn’t know when it’s time to end a conversation.

“Daichi, are you drunk?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Why are you calling me at 4am?”

He doesn’t say anything for a moment. Maybe it’s the only aspect he and his sister share - that small little doubt, showing that they’re never sure of what to say.

“Because I don’t u-understand,” he hiccups.

“What?”

Then his voice breaks, like a ship that’s slowly claimed by the waves to be sunken forever.

“Eijirou... Eijirou... I don’t understand why she left... Eijirou, was it really bad for her? Was it that bad that she couldn’t tell anyone?”

I bite my bottom lip until I feel a hot droplet of blood running down my chin. What do I say to him? That she was trying to tell them? That they didn’t listen? That none of us did?

“It’s not your fault, Daichi. Go to sleep,”

“But...”

“We’ll talk again tomorrow if you want to. Now go to sleep.”

“Okay, thanks.”

“Yeah.”

I end the call and fall back to my bed. My bed is incredibly cold and unwelcoming. I slump my way towards the kitchen and sit there until the first droplets of liquid gold begin to pour inside.

Calendar shows 11th of April, 2025.

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

I put Cyclamens in the vase. It’s the day we meet again. I don’t know what to hope for and while I’m going, my insecurities and fears follow close, only to disappear as soon as i see her.

She looks like a goddess. Her hair like rays of sunshine that found their place in the waves of locks on her head, her skin seems to shine, like it’s been kissed by stars and her smile only compliments her beauty.

Nothing’s changed but when I come closer, I notice that her eyes are different. All the happiness and joy is drained and now they’re empty. No, not empty... Just filled with something I can’t quite identify.

“It’s you...” I manage to whisper and before I start feeling like an idiot, she laughs with that wonderful laugh wrapping me with the feeling of safety, telling me that everything’s okay.

“It’s me.” she confirms and puts her forehead against mine. We drown in the silence, away from everything.

“I often wonder why you did that.”

She pulls away and her hands find their place on the back of my neck, as if we’re dancing, “I did it for myself.”

I sigh, “I don’t understand it. I don't understand it, Y/N,”

My hands dance on her waist, not finding their place.

“I wasn’t happy, Eijirou. I wasn’t happy there.”

I sigh again and pull her against my body. She smells like vanilla and clean laundry,

“Could I’ve made you happy?” I quietly ask and she raises her glance. Her empty eyes that pulled me in so strongly.

“No, it’s not your fault, Eijirou,” she answers and wipes away my tears that I didn’t even know were falling, “I did it for myself, I did it so I could be happy. Eijirou, I feel good now.”

I look up to the bright blue sky. There’s only one cloud there.

I take in a stuttering breath.

“Wasn’t there anything I could do?” Tears now flow freely as I try to not look at her. Somewhere deep inside I know this isn’t real and I’m afraid that she’ll disappear if I look at her for too long.

She takes my face into her hands, softly stroking it with one hand. Her glance is soft and for a moment, I see the Y/N I used to know before.

“All you can do right now is forgive me,” she whispers and I pet her silky hair, “And forgive yourself, Eijirou. You can’t carry the guilt of other people’s choices. You can’t live with a fault that isn’t your’s.”

That’s the last time I hear her voice.

When I wake up, I see her face right before my eyes but it’s not a ghost who drags a trail of unanswered questions after itself. No, it’s now a person I once loved so much. A person that I couldn’t hate for leaving me in pieces of my former self.

There’s a bunch of yellow Daffodils and Forget-Me-Not’s in my hands. Forget-Me-Not’s for a promise, that she’ll always be dear to me and Daffodils - the second promise, that I will finally start everything over again.

I leave the flowers on her grave, which I finally visited after two years.

It’s time to forgive her. It’s time to forgive myself.

I come back home and check the calendar for the last time. My new beginning is on 11th of April, 2026. Two years after her death.

“The sun will rise, and we will try again,” she used to say. With those words, I breathe in and peel the calendar page off.

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

As always, thanks @velvet-kissesss​ for editing!