F1 Angst - Tumblr Posts

The handsome artist. 10. (Daniel Ricciardo)

Dew on the Vine. A part from Daniel's past comes back and it hits like a tsunami. MASTERLIST. Moodboards and Playlist. Previous part: The Ricciardos. Listen to: Dew on the Vine by Bear's Den. Really, listen to it. It's awesome.

Note: is this the first angsty part? I think so. This has been written for ages and patiently waiting on my drafts. Warning: mentions of a horrendous ex and kind of unwanted babies. Consumption of alcohol as the main plot.

"Nah mate, I told you I am taken" I told Pierre.

"You aren't dating her" He insisted. There was a blonde girl he wanted me to meet. He said she was his friend and have been asking about me the whole night.

"Yet, Pierre. Yet."

After seeing her around my family, mum's words, the kids adoring her... I was even more sure than before. I wanted her. I liked her way too much to let her go. I needed her in my life.

"It won't hurt anyone."

I rolled my eyes at the French and drank from what was my 4th beer.

"Who are you and where is the Danny Ric I know?"

"He is right here. He just likes a girl and doesn't want to be with anyone else at the moment"

"Why?"

"Because it feels weird even thinking of it."

"Have you fucked her?"

I looked at Pierre and swallowed.

"No?" He asked with surprise on his face.

"No"

"Then?"

"I won't, Pierre. Tell your friend I'm not interested" I tried to sound as polite as possible, but he was irritating me.

I grabbed my beer and walked away. I couldn't even think of anyone else. During my lonely nights, it was Abi who appeared on my mind. At first I thought I was being weird, I thought about how I shouldn't. Then one night I just let go and I had been lost since then. It was only her in my mind now. Of course I found others pretty. I hadn't gone blind. But I only had eyes for her.

I found Michael and Blake and sat on a stool with them. 4 beers became 5 then 6 and 7 and soon I was a bit tipsy.

"Hey, I'm gonna take some air" I said grabbing Mike's arm. "I have a couple of appointments tomorrow"

"Fine. Well wait here"

As I walked outside and the humid air hit my face, I felt slightly better. The pub's heat was suffocating me. Also, it wasn't a good idea to go all hungover to tattoo some dudes. I took deep breaths and leaned on Piarles' front wall. I pulled my phone out and saw it.

Abi🌼: have so much fun, see you on monday❤️

It brought a smile to my face. She had asked how the family had arrived in Australia. She told me to send them lots of kisses. Then, we had only been talking about coffee. I had only suggested meeting on a break from work. Maybe something between tattoos or deliveries. She had sent a smiley face and a yes and that was enough to keep me happy. I wanted to

I lift my head and thought about something to send. Something sweet. But I saw a face. A very familiar face.

No, no, no. She was supposed to leave. Why is she here? She was gone. She can't come back now that everything is fantastic.

I tried to walk back inside.

"Danny!"

I felt a wave of nausea hearing her saying my name. Stupid me, unable to be a jerk, I turned around.

"Holly"

She was way closer than I thought. It took me by surprise when she went and hug me.

I closed my eyes for a second and tried to not push her away.

Flashback.

Holly was in front of me. She was crying and I hadn't even told her anything. Just a we need to talk.

Michael was right. She was no good, she was toxic and manipulative. And I had just realized that, after more than a year and a half, I wasn't happy with her.

"Holly... I... I'm really sorry. But... I think we should break up"

Her eyes opened like plates and she tried to grab me. But I pulled away.

"No, Holly."

"Danny, we... We can talk, we can figure it out. Don't give up so easily, baby"

She cupped my cheeks and I closed my eyes. I didn't want to see her. I couldn't look at her in the eyes.

"I can't do this anymore. I-It's no good for any of us"

"It's not! It's perfect! Can't you see we are made for each other? Can't you see you mum loves me?"

"No... Don't say that"

It wasn't true. It was mum the first one who warned me.

"It's over"

I pulled away from her.

"It can't be! I'm pregnant! I'm having your kid!"

I felt dizzy for a moment. It was as if someone had dropped frozen water in me.

Pregnant with my child?

"What?"

"We are going to be parents, Daniel" She walked to me and hugged my waist. I felt as if her skin pushed needles on mine.

"How?"

"I thought you knew..." She said with a cheeky smile and then went to kiss my lips.

But no. I moved my head to the side.

"I always use protection, you are on the pill"

"I suppose it failed."

I closed my eyes and pinched my nose.

What's the probability of both methods failing?

"Danny... Please. Just... Let's give it a try. You always talk about how you want kids. You are wonderful with Isaac and Isabelle. You are the best uncle and will be the best dad. Just try. For this baby" She touched her flat stomach and grabbed my hand. "Please. Let's give it a try for our son"

"Son?"

"I think it will be a boy. Mother instinct"

She was right. I wanted nothing more than having my own kids. I wanted nothing more than being a dad. But I also wanted to break up with her. She was no good for me. She was no good for anyone.

"Danny? Think about how happy your mum will be! She will be a grandma again!"

And I believed her. I gave it a try. I laid my hand on her belly and closed my eyes. My kid was there. I'll do it for them.

End of the Flashback.

She let me go and kissed my cheek, way too close to my lips for my liking. I wanted to vomit.

My chest felt tight and I had a knot in my stomach.

"I missed you so much, Danny. You look so good. You have been taking care of yourself, eh"

I simply nodded.

"What are you doing here, Holly?"

"I came to visit my mum. She told me your family was over! How is Grace? And the kids? I miss those little rascals so much."

No, no, no. Don't talk about them.

Holly had been sweet to my family in front of me. She had been the best aunt, the best sister and daughter in law. She had been awesome and made me feel she was the one. Then behind my back, she had gone and talk shit to my mum. She had gone and insult my dad. She had made the kids fight between them, she had made toddlers fight between them. She had left my sister out of the house. She had been shit to them while I thought they were just exaggerating.

"They already left"

"Oh, I could have just gone and say hi if I had known" She took my hand and I was unable to pull away. "Tell me, Danny. How is everything going? How is the studio?"

"Fine"

"I'm so sorry we finished things like that. But maybe we can meet, have a coffee and talk about it."

Flashback.

I walked to the door slowly. Holly was there talking to her cousin.

"He knows nothing yet."

I pressed my ear to the door.

"He is not that intelligent. He is just a man after all, right?" She laughed. "Yeah, how can't he even notice my stomach is not growing? We fuck like every day. It's not that I'm hiding"

I frowned. Her stomach?

"Yeah. I will fake an abortion or something. I'll say it was spontaneous. Shit happens. He is going to Australia soon. A wedding or something. I will do it then so when he comes I will be out of the hospital. There won't be anyway he can notice. He hasn't even notice I'm not really pregnant. Then I will have some kind of dreppesed state, then another. If the man is something, it's loyal. He won't break up with me in such a state. After loosing my baby and all... "

I felt my head turning. I hadn't heard all of that. It was just a bad dream. I would wake up on my bed, next to her. Next to a pregnant Holly growing my child. Child I already loved even when I just wanted their mum away.

"He is a fucking prick, but there is money, good sex, parties... And that friend of his. Michael? Yeah. I will try. I'm sure I can get him to fuck me"

I grabbed the handle and opened the door so hard it hitted the wall and came back to me.

She looked at me and her eyes showed only panic. I swear I had never been more disgusted to see a face. I just hated her.

End of the Flashback.

"Don't touch me, Holly. I have nothing to talk about with you"

"OH, baby..."

She tried to touch my face but I walked back.

"Mummy!"

Goosebumps ran over me. Was it...

A man, maybe ten years older than me which meant probably 15 years older than Holly, was walking to us with a kid on his arm. A very young kid.

I looked down at her. Why did it hurt so much? Why? She only made my life miserable, she tricked me, she lied in the worst possible way. Why was I feeling all this pain?

"How old is he?" The boy was clearly theirs.

"He is two."

Some quick maths and yes.

"You went right after... Right after what you did and got pregnant. With someone else kid? Right after?"

"Danny... I..."

"No. Tell me the fucking truth." I took a step closer to her, raising a over her and making her look small. I didn't feel pity for her.

"I... I... I tried to... I didn't want it to be a lie... I want it to be real so... I..."

Gears worked in my head and it finally made sense.

"You couldn't get pregnant with mine. I didn't stopped using protection."

Her eyes watered and I felt rage.

"Danny..."

"You tried to get someone's else and then tell me it was mine." I spit and my breath got more ragged. "Tell me!"

"Hey dude"

The men pushed me away.

"If you talk to my wife like that again..."

I lift my hands and turned around. I couldn't look at her anymore. I couldn't see her again. That woman hadn't enough with one lie. She hadn't enough. She just couldn't stop. I walked away fast, I was having some kind of tunnel vision. I needed a drink or two. I needed to get her out of my mind.

Where to go or to hide, You're only worth your old lies Confiding in your own mine, Caught in the cold lie, I thought you were better man I thought you were better man

A slip step on the tight rope, Freaked out by a false hope That things could be alright No they're not alright

So I found a bar. A dark one. The people inside was creepy. Lonely big men drinking alone and in silence with some hard metal on the background. The bartender looked at me.

"Whiskey?"

I nodded.

She was back in town. Would she stay? Would I watch her usually? Would she try to reach for me again? Would she learn about Abigail? Would she try with her what she did with anyone else?

The whiskey cup kept coming and the bill kept growing. I couldn't care less.

"Hey! You drank too much, why don't you go and take a walk?"

I didn't knew what time it was. I only knew that the bartender was pushing me.

So I just let him push me out of the bar. I found myself on the street, not able to walk in a straight line and definitely not remembering where my car was. So I took my phone out.

15 missed calls by Michael.

7 missed calls by Blake.

I couldn't face them not like this. They would only hate me. They would only get angry at me for falling this low.

I called the only person I wanted to see now. I wanted the only one I wanted to be with now. Call me if you need me, she said. And fuck. I needed her so bad.

Dramatic and short. But hey! Some of Danny's past!!!

Next part: Warm shower.

The Handsome Artist. 11. (Daniel Ricciardo)

Warm shower. Abi finds Danny, he only needs some love and care.

MASTERLIST. Moodboard and Playlist.

Previous part: Dew on the Vine

Note: more drama. Pic from here.

Warning: Danny is drunk. I don't really know if there is much to warn.

The phone rang and I woke up startled. I looked around and saw the phone, the screen shining white. I reached for it and checked it.

The Handsome Artist is calling.

"What?"

It was too late for Daniel to be calling me. I picked it fast, feeling a knot on my stomach. Did something happened to his family?

"Danny?"

"Abi. It's you?" He sound so desperate.

He was drunk.

I sat on the bed and turned the light on.

"Yes, it's me. Are you okay?"

Silence. Long seconds without a word but with a rapid breath on the other side.

"No" I heard him whisper. He clearly didn't sound well.

I standed up and started pacing around the room. I started looking for my shoes.

"Where are you, Danny? You drank, right?" I asked while trying to stay calm. I needed to stay calm.

"Yes" He made a long pause that only worsed my nerves. "I don't know. I-I was with Mike and Blake and then... I went outside and... Oh fuck. It wasn't suppose to happen again"

"What happened Danny? Are you okay? Are you hurt?"

"I'm just drunk. But... Pick me please... I can't be alone. I don't want to. I need you. Don't leave me alone"

I had to stop moving for a second. I wasn't used to be on this side of the story. I wasn't used to be the helping hand.

"Oh fuck, right. You were with Michael right? Is he not there?"

"No..."

"Okay. Did you walk too much? Did you take your car?"

Los Angeles was so fucking big. He could be anywhere. He was so drunk and it could be dangerous. He could hurt someone or himself.

"No... I'm just here. Waiting outside for you"

"What can you see, Daniel?" Maybe there was something, a building a painting on a wall, monument, the sea. I would drive down the whole coast if I needed to.

"C-cars..." He answered weakly. "I'm so drunk. I don't know"

"Okay. Stay whenever you are. I will go soon. Promise me you won't move"

"I-I promise"

"And keep your phone in hand."

"Bye bye, Abi."

"I will be there in a second, Daniel. You will be okay"

He hung the call and I called Michael as fast as I could. It didn't took him long to pick.

"Abigail. Is he with you?" He asked. His voice was tense.

I bit my lip. It was bad, right?

"What happened? He called. He said he doesn't know where he is but wants me to pick him."

"Fuck. He is fine at least."

"He didn't sound fine, Michael." I didn't want to be rude, but I was so fucking scared. What the hell was happening?

"What did he said?"

"He is waiting outside for me. He didn't took the car. And... He said he is just there. Maybe he didn't go far. He is too drunk to properly describe the place."

"Okay. We were at Piarles and he went out to have some air. But he didn't came back and we went to find him. I'm still here with Blake, we have just come back. We thought he may had done it too. All his stuff is here"

"Okay. Listen, Michael. I will get there super fast. And we can look for him"

"Blake is saying he will stay here just in case. I will take a walk around here."

"Okay. Just... Keep your phone close"

"Okay. See you"

His tense voice only made me stress more.

I never got dressed so fast. Soon I was driving down Oceans Ave, on Venice Beach direction. Gladly, it would only take me a few minutes.

I received a call halfway.

"I'm with him"

"Oh shit, okay. Okay. How is he?" I felt a huge weight falling from my shoulders.

"Drunk. Too drunk."

"Where are you?"

"There is a bar. Hell's gate... Two streets up from Piarles. Behind that huge bakery"

"Fucking shit"

"Yeah..."

"I'm almost there"

I found them soon and I didn't even bother to park the truck. Who would come at this time in the night? I left it almost in the middle of the street and jumped down.

Michael looked at me and took a couple of steps. I was scared of what I would find.

"Abigail... I..."

"What happened?"

"Don't..." Daniel warned.

I looked behind Michael. Daniel was sitting on a step, his head was on his arms and he looked defeated. He looked so small.

"Okay, mate. I won't tell her." Michael said and whispered, then he took my hand and pulled me away. "It's something really delicate for him. He is not well right now."

I bit my lip. I wanted to cry. I was so confused.

"But he wants to go with you so..."

"How bad is it?"

"He is affected. But it happened a while ago. He'll be fine tomorrow. I think."

"Will he?" I asked worried. I knew well what was feeling like this.

"I think so. Do you want me to go with you?"

I shook my head.

"It's fine. You and Blake should go and rest."

"Call me if you need help"

"Okay. I will."

"He did nothing bad, okay? It's not like a big problem. Nothing illegal or stuff like that. He is safe. Only some ghosts from the past"

I nodded.

"And does he usually do this?" I asked worried. If he had a problem with alcohol I wanted to know.

"Drink like this? No. I think it's only the second time."

I sighed. What could make someone like Danny feel this bad? He was a sunshine. He had been the happiest guy during the whole week. I couldn't stop thinking about his smile while we had lunch with his family.

"Fine. Danny, mate. Abigail is here. Let's get you in the car."

Michael moved Daniel and helped him walk to the car. I realized then how bad it was. His face was red and his eyes were swollen from crying.

Daniel closed the door and laid his head on the window. It was painful to watch him like this.

I felt Michael touching my shoulder.

"He will be fine. He needs to sleep a bit and when he sobbers things will be cleared. He had already drank a bit. It was our mate's birthday" He said looking at me with a thin smile. He seemed more relaxed, so that helped. "I'll talk to Lewis so tomorrow he won't have to work. I don't think he can draw a straight line."

"Okay. I'll tell him."

"Take care of him"

I nodded.

"I will"

"Good night. Thank you, Abigail"

"Good night, Michael. Thank you too."

I sat on the car once Michael had left and turned the music on. Daniel hugged himself and pressed his forehead against the glass.

"Let's go to sleep, yeah?"

I got no answer, but I started driving eventhough. I was slightly shaken. Not more than half an hour ago I was sleeping. Now I got him in the car and he was so broken.

When I finally parked in front of the shop, Daniel had almost fell asleep. He was looking a bit pale, but covered in a thin layer of sweat. His clothes were a mess and he smelled like an old road bar.

"Dan?" as I touched his hair, he jumped on his seat. "Hey, it's just me"

His scared eyes softened and his hand touched mine.

"Hi..."

"Hi. We are home. Let's go"

He turned his face to the shop.

"Charlotte's Garden. I love this place"

It made me smile. Even this drunk he was cute as hell.

I walked to his side of the truck and opened the door. It was difficult to take his tall lanky figure out of the car. I should have taken Michael's help, offered him a coffee and let him help me with Danny.

With Daniel hanging on my shoulders, taking clumsy steps and murmuring incomprehensible stuff, we walked to the side door. To cross the shop with Daniel in this state would be a trap. Pots, plants and furniture laying everywhere would only make it more difficult.

The stairs weren't easy either.

"Oops" He said when he almost fall on the last step.

"Hey, grab into me."

He obeyed and let me open the door. Inside the apartment, he looked around.

"It's... You"

I smiled.

"What does it mean?"

"T-his place is yours" He said leaning on the wall. "It smells like you, it has your vibes, it looks like you..."

I smiled and took his hand and pulled him with me.

"Where are you taking me?" with heavy steps he followed me, but he sounded so weak, so tired.

"To the shower. You need a warm shower"

Danny was in a very bad state. I knew I would need to do the job. But he had called me, he wanted my help.

"Why are you so nice?"

The question took me by surprise. I stopped and let him in the bathroom.

"What do you mean?"

"You were nice since the beginning. You are so sweet. You were even when you didn't know me."

He pressed his back to the wall and looked inside the shower. Then smiled.

"You have plants in the shower." He said chuckling. "See? I always tell my mates you are special"

My stomach was knotted. He was broken. He sounded so defeated. I simply grabbed his hand and stroked my thumb over it.

"You deserve good things, Dan"

He shook his hand and pulled it out of mine. Then harsly tried to take his clothes.

Trying to not feel hurt, I reached out to help him. But again he tried to stop me.

"Hey, hey, hey. It's just me, Dan. It's just me. Trust me. I will help you" I lift my hands in front of him.

He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead on mine. He had drunk too much.

"You are too nice..."

"You need my help. I'm not too nice. I'm just a human being. I'm helping my friend" I said caressing his shoulders.

Then he cupped my cheek and I felt the air leaving my lungs. His eyes were glassy as they looked at mine.

"I hope you have never felt how bad human beings can be, because if you have, I will go and make each one of them misserable"

I bit my lip to not cry. I had to be strong. I would cry later.

If you only knew, Danny.

"Let's get you out of this clothes." I said to avoid breaking down.

It was more difficult than I expected. My hands were shaking and he couldn't help much. But I managed to strip him to his underwear and opened the shower glass. Daniel clumsily got inside, planting his palms on the wall once again.

"Okay... Um..." and now what? "Danny, I'll sit right here in the toilet. Just... Let the water fall, okay? You will sober and get some sleep. Tomorrow you can shower properly."

I turned around and closed the glass a bit. I didn't want to cross lines. He was vulnerable now. I didn't want to leave him exposed.

Then I heard the water running and a second later a sob. A sob that came out of his chest as if it had been trying to scape for ages. My heart clenched and I did the only thing that came to my mind. I took my shoes off and opened the glass. Under the water and with his head hanging from his shoulders, Daniel was shaking and sobbing. I closed the glass behind me and carefully touched his back. Goosebumps ran over it. I was expecting him to flinch, to move away. But no. Daniel turned around and fell against me.

I gasped when the water started falling over me, drenching my clothes and my hair.

Daniel hugged me and I forgot about the uncomfortable feeling. I snaked my arms around him and stroked his back.

I was standing there with him, he was crying and I knew absolutely nothing about what had brought him to this state. Why did he drank this much? Why was he crying? What happened in the past? Who had treated him so poorly? How could I help?

His hands grabbed into my sides and I felt his body shaking. The poor man was broken in pieces and I just wanted to bring them back together.

I brought my hand to his hair and threaded my fingers on his wet curls. He whimpered at the touch and pressed his nose to my neck.

"Let go, Danny... I'm here with you... Just let go. I got you" I whispered and kissed his temple and cheeks multiple times.

He cried for long minutes. I had never seen someone so fragile. Anyone but myself.

The water was cold and he still had goosebumps, so I reached to move the handle to the warmer side. He sighed in relief. It wasn't too hot or too cold. Just perfect.

I decided that I would help him shower. He needed it. He needed to wash away all the sadness. He needed to clean the remains of that bar on his skin.

"Hey, Danny..." I said hugging his shoulders and pressing my cheek against his. It gave me the angle to whisper on his neck "Do you want me to help you with your hair?"

I have needed this closeness with him. It was the only thing I wanted since he hugged me from the first time. But it felt sour now.

He took a deep breath and pulled back, nodding slightly and cleaning the tears that the water had already washed away.

"Thank you" He hiccuped. "Don't tell my mum this"

I giggled a bit. "I won't, don't worry"

Caressing his cheek I made sure he was feeling better. He was still all drunk, but he wasn't crying that much and was more steady.

"Let's clean you so you can go to sleep"

I grabbed my shampoo.

"This is for curly hair, so it will make yours look so perfect. You will see." I said with a smile. Maybe thinking about anything else helped.

He had to grab my waist to not fall.

"Whoops. Sorry"

"It's okay."

I cut the water and put the shampoo on his hair. He was way taller than me, so it was a bit difficult at first. But soon he had leaned a bit and closed his eyes. His mouth was half open and the bubbles ran down the side of his face and neck. When I let the water fall again, it ran down his neck and chest, shoulders and abs. I took for the first time a look of his body, his tanned skin and different moles here and there, perfectly drawned tattoos and his thigh covered in colorful drawings. He had that nose and those lips, the brown eyes and perfectly messy hair. He was beautiful. He was a beautiful man, both inside and outside.

Daniel opened his eyes and looked at me.

"You are drenched." He touched my shoulder and then ran his fingers up to my neck, pushing my hair behind my ear.

I shivered.

"It's okay. I won't need to shower in the morning" I smiled at him and grabbed the soap.

With my own sponge, I helped him cleaning his skin. I just wanted to get that alcohol smell out of him. I needed him to be comfortable again.

Daniel sighed when I rubbed it over his shoulders, probably feeling some relief on his tense muscles.

"You will feel better in the morning. You will see things clearer." I said remembering what Michael said.

He looked at me and bit his lip.

"I just thought it was over and I wouldn't have to face it anymore"

I left the sponge on its place and ran my hands over his skin to wash the coconut soap away. It was soft and warm, but his muscles felt hard under it.

"You have to face the shit that scares you. Even if you don't want to. You can't have complete control of everything that happens in your life. And it's okay to break down. Face your problems doesn't mean always staying strong over them." Those words had worked for me. Facing my fears had brought me Danny. I had cried and had bad days, I still could have them. But I was learning to manage those bad days because the recompense was bigger. It was worth it. Danny was a ray of sunshine during black cloudy days.

"I owe you an explanation" He whispered while running his finger over my cheek. I stopped the water and leaned on his touch. He cupped my face. Although I was dying to know what happened, to help him more, he owed me nothing.

"I won't ask you for it, I will wait till you are ready to tell me."

He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. I cupped his cheeks and kissed his forehead.

"Let's get out"

Outside the shower, we made a puddle in the floor, but I would take care of that later.

I covered him in the fluffliest towel I had and dried his face and hair with another. He let me do it without complaining. Then, I turned.

"Take your boxers off. I will wash your clothes."

"You don't have to"

Against his words, the boxer fell on the bundle of clothes.

"I do, they stink" I said joking a bit.

He giggled and I felt lighter.

"I'm covered." He announced.

I turned around. He looked so cute with the towel around him.

"Hey" I cupped his chin and he looked at me. "Go outside and dry yourself. I need to get this clothes off. Wait there"

He nodded and walked outside. I closed the door but not completely, enough to have privacy but being able to hear him still.

I took the wet clothes of and dried my hair a bit, put a cotton bathrobe and went out to the bedroom.

"Danny, I don't have clothes for you. Do you mind sleeping naked?" I asked with pink cheeks.

He blushed too.

"Do you mind me sleeping on your sofa naked?"

"You are sleeping on the bed, silly. Just tuck yourself inside. I don't mind."

"Abi..."

"Don't fight, Dan" I pointed a finger at him.

He laughed a bit. His cheeks were pink and he looked cute. He was happier now. Or at least that's what he seemed.

I left him there and took his clothes to the wash machine. Then grabbed some clean pyjamas from the basket and put them on. I took a glass and a jar of water and brought it to the bedroom.

"Here. Have some."

He was sitting on the bed, the sheets covering him to his chest and his eyes on the decorated wall.

"I'm sorry for all of this"

"Don't be"

He had sobered a lot but had the drunken haze over him. Slow words, dizzy head, glassy eyes...

He took a sip of water and I sat on the edge of the bed. I reached to touch his shoulder. Is skin was still warm.

"If you get cold, just tell me, okay?"

"I'm not ill, just drunk" He chuckled.

That made me laugh too.

"Okay. Tell me anyways"

I got up and went to clean the bathroom. It was 4am and I had to open the shop at 9.30. But I couldn't care less.

When I finally went back to the room, he was laying facing the window. It was a bit open and the waves could be heard perfectly without all the cars and people. He was still awake.

Without speaking, I took the blankets out of the wardrobe.

"Hey. Mind laying here for a bit?" He asked softly.

I gulped.

"Are you sure?"

"You help me to relax."

I gasped because that was the exact effect the had on me. Not today. Today he had scared me to death. But on regular basis. He was calming. He was gentle and laid back.

"O-okay"

I laid over the covers. He was naked and drunk, I wouldn't lay in there with him. Then I put the blanket over me and nuzzled on it.

"You are cute." He whispered before closing his eyes. He reached for my hand and grabbed it, then he pulled it until it was against his chest. A couple of minutes later he was asleep and I was feeling so many things. My heart rate was fast, my cheeks were warm. I didn't knew how to feel.

It took me a while to fall asleep, all his words and actions during the night still flying on my mind. But I did after all. His gorgeous face was the last thing I remembered from that night.

Danny POV.

I opened my eyes and groaned. Fucking whiskey, fucking beer and fucking past. I rolled in the warm and soft sheets and it hit me. I was at Abigail's. Everything came like a tsunami and I felt ashamed and overwhelmed. I felt nausea and the head ache intensified. All the memories were only making it worse. I brushed my eyes and took deep breaths trying to compose myself a bit.

I smelt like her and I was surrounded by her presence. I sat on the bed. I was alone on her bedroom after putting myself through the biggest embarrassment. She had to fucking shower my drunk ass. I couldn't even stand properly. I was a fucking mess. I was an idiot.

I looked around. Plants, photos, different drawings and macrame stuff hanging on the walls, different colored furniture and a wicker chair next to the window. The ocean in front of me. This was all Abigail. Everything screamed her name. Even my clothes carefully folded in the chair. And the note with them. A note.

I got up and run there, my head killing me for the fast movements.

"Shit" I groaned and steadied myself on the wall.

I was naked. Little thing I didn't remember about. Had she seen me? No, right? She had kept my underwear on in the shower and she was a respectful woman. Then it was kind of blurry.

But there I was. Standing naked on her room, a soft carpet under my feet and a hand written note on my hand.

"Good morning, Dan.

I hope you are feeling better this morning. I waited a bit for you to wake up, but you were exhausted and sleeping like a baby. You will find me in the shop, just open the green door with a glass and a crochet curtain. There you will find the metallic stairs you saw from the shop.

Don't go down there without going to the kitchen first. Blue door, I always leave it open so it's easy. I made coffee, it's on the counter. I only have cereal and fruit for breakfast, but you can find some yogurt in the bridge. Have some breakfast, please. And don't you dare to say it's too much.

Your clothes are clean, but you probably already know that. You shoes are next to the green door. Your wallet, phone and keys on the kitchen table, Michael has your other things. They already know you are safe and sound and he texted Lewis. Everything is shorted. You needed to rest and we let you.

See you later, Abi"

And when I thought she couldn't be more perfect, she did all of this. She had picked me from a bar when I was probably on my lowest point in months. She had showered me. She had cleaned my clothes and let me sleep on her bed. She had taken care of me without doubting. When Michael said that not everyone was that bad, he was right. Abi was goodness. I had faced the worst person I could ever find but then life had given me this little forest elf who made everyone happy only with her presence.

I did everything she told me, walking around the apartment and letting it sinking in. I wanted to remember the smell of it. Wood, coffee, vanilla... Even her soap on my skin. The place was so perfect, so much like her. It was welcoming and cozy, but packed with lots of things. Pebbles, little branches, shells,... She was a materialist. She liked to have thousands of things.

Something got my attention. In a corner and carefully placed in a wall, there was my drawing. The first drawing I did of her tattoo. I felt those butterflies on my stomach. My cheeks warmed and suddenly everything wasn't that bad.

The coffee was ready for me just as I had it when we had breakfast at Charlotte's.

I fucking like her so much it's hurts.

When I was ready, dressed and looking way better than last night I opened the green door. From the shop, Friend of the Devil by Mumford and sons could be heard. Lewis said once that music made people attractive and fuck. He was so right.

I realized I had the perfect way to say sorry and pay for this messy night. There was something my friends and I were planning for a long time. Now I wanted her to come.

I walked down. I hadn't felt this nervous in a while. She was alone in the shop, dressed on and overall and wearing one of those crochet tops under it. Her hair was on a bun and kept up with some bandana. On her feet she had a pair of sandals. She was softly singing the song. She is the prettiest woman alive.

"Good morning"

She shouted and the pot she had in hand almost fell.

"Oh fuck. Danny! Don't do that! You scared me!"

I laughed and walked closer. She left the pot on the floor and also walked to me.

"Good morning, Dan. Did you slept well?"

"Like a baby" I answered with a sigh.

She smiled and took my hand. That's why I had slept so well. Be cause she was there with me.

"It's almost mid-day, but I'm glad. Did you had breakfast, right?"

"Almost lunch, but I did, yes. It was delicious."

"Good"

We stayed in silence, looking at each other. We were different but similar. Curly dark hair, similar skin and brown eyes. She had much more freckles and a straight nose. But she even loved funky shirts like me.

"Thank you"

Abi shook her head and looked at our joined hands. Hers was so delicate and small next to mine. It wasn't soft, she worked with her hands and it showed. But the various rings and her painted nails felt so characteristic of her.

"It's nothing. You scared me a bit. Just that." She said almost whispering.

"I'm so sorry"

I was embarrassed. It wasn't her fault, not even close, but she had dealt with all my shit. Somehow, last night I only felt safe with her. After seeing Holly, Abi was the only person in my life good enough to keep me safe.

"Let me pay you..."

"No" She said shaking her hand. "No, no way. This is not a hotel."

"Not with money." I pull her hand a bit to stop her rambling" My friends and I are going to Red Rocks. A good mate of mine has a house close. In Morrison." I smiled when her face lit up. "Would you like to come with us? With me?"

"Red Rocks? Like... The amphitheater. Red Rocks in Colorado?"

"Yes, baby. Red Rocks in Colorado." I answered smiling.

"Who plays?" She ask cautiously but with a smile threatening to scape.

"Well. We have tickets for two days. Do you remember Caamp?"

"Your friends? All the debts I owe"

She remembered the first song I played to her.

"Exactly. They play on Friday. And on Saturday..." I dragged the words, giving some thrill to the it.

"What? Who?!"

I smiled and bit my lip.

"By any chance, do you now a band called..."

"Called what?!" She insisted almost laughing.

"The National"

She gasped. I saw how the yes was hanging from her tongue. How excited she was. How her eyes were brilliant. She covered her mouth and suddenly the shy Abi came. She swallowed hard and I worried a tiny bit.

"Okay. Um... I'm an adult and I can make decisions but I have to think stuff a lot. You may call me an overthinker." She giggled nervously. "I will give it a thought, okay? I will tell you soon. I'm just unable to plan things like this. I just don't work well like that. I need to talk about this and all of that, you know how Charlotte is."

I smiled because I had seen how she wanted to come, how excited she was. But I would let her think. I had no problem with that. I just wanted her close.

"It's okay. Think about it. You know Mike and Blake. They will be there. And so will I, of course. I will manage to get a room only for you" I winked at her and she smiled.

I was sure she didn't want to share a room with a bunch of guys.

"Okay. I will tell you soon."

"Two weeks. That's all the time you have"

"Plenty of time" She smiled.

I looked at her and opened my arms. After all I needed a hug. I was tired and drained, overwhelmed and highly hoping for Lewis to have canceled my appointments.

Abi had taken care of me, she had done it so well and I could remember almost anything. Her tender words and soft touches. Her hands on me while she showered me, her reassuring words. She hadn't judged me, she just let it happened and lend a hand. I needed a hug of hers.

She saw my arms and smiled.

"Okay, come here" Abi whispered with a soft smile.

I hugged her and pulled her as close as I needed her. She was pressed around me and the soft skin on his shoulders felt so good under my fingertips. Her hand went up my back to my hair and I hid on her neck.

"Just call me if you want to talk, okay? Whenever you feel comfortable"

I heard her whisper. It only made me wrap my hands tighter around her even more. She would be the end of me.

This idea came when I haven't even written chapter 5. It came and I wrote it then. I'm pretty happy with this chapter and I hope you like how things are going with this story.

Next part: Let's go, Colorado. Out soon.

Tags: @controsnes @thybulleric @ln15 @lcuppo @priylodhasstuff @shadowbowgirl13 @txtflxx @scotlynaurora @chxrryrose @f1-incorrect-s

The Handsome Artist. 14 (Daniel Ricciardo)

I fucked it. A bad move ends the perfect weekend too soon.

MASTERLIST. Moodboard and Playlist.

Previous part: Lavender Girl.

Note: when I asked what did you think that would happen on this chapter only 1 person got close to it. But yeah, you all have good ideas, I would have choose them if this wasn't already planned.

Warning: panic attack.

"Do you want to stay for dinner?" I whispered as I looked at him. Parked in front of the shop, we had been talking about the weekend for a long half an hour. I didn't want it to end that soon.

We had left Michael and Blake at home, as they had come with us. Danny had insisted on leaving them there first and then Blake joked about ho he wanted some alone time.

"Do you want me to stay?" He asked smiling. He was so handsome, it's wasn't fair.

"Of course. I don't have much, but maybe we can find a pizza on the freezer" I said grabbing his hand.

"Sounds really good"

"Let's go then"

Being quite the gentleman, Daniel helped me with my luggage, following me upstairs and being so much agile than the first time he came here. I sighed remembering that, the story he told me on Friday still raw on my mind.

"Welcome"

"You have the prettiest house. It's so cozy and cute" He giggled.

It made me smile.

"Choose any vinyl you want" I said pointing at them. "Do you mind if I change? You can take your shoes off. Get comfortable"

He nodded.

"Go. I'll be here"

It took me longer than expected to get changed. I needed some time of silence, being alone in my room and breathing deeply. The weekend had been awesome. I had forgotten about everything. I had enjoyed like a little kid and could feel how close Danny and I had gotten. We had kissed, we had danced and sang together, we had shared a bed, we had done so many new things together. So many thing you would do with your partner and I had loved every single one of them. On those moments, I tried to not think much about it. Mainly because I suspected that Daniel had started to learn how to read my emotions. Now it felt more real. The insecurity was back.

He was on my living room, shoesless and waiting for me to have dinner and it felt domestic. It felt like something that will definitely should happen. That was meant to happen.

As I went outside and found him walking around the living room, the nerves settled on my stomach. We were completely alone now.

"Hey, I forgot to tell you. I got this for Charlotte" He had a little packet on his hand.

"What?"

"The magnet."

"Shit. I forgot."

"But I remembered. So no problem"

Stupid and adorable, Danny. Always cute and perfect.

"Thank you so much..." I walked to him and took the little paper thing. I opened. It was a little Red Rocks magnet.

"I bought it on the gas station. But when I came out you were talking to Blake and Mike and I forgot completely." He had the softest smile on his face and looked tired as hell. Today the four of us had taken turns on driving, but after the long weekend it was obvious we were all exhausted.

"Thank you very much, really. I don't know how you did it, but she adores you so much. It's insane"

He smiled and cupped my face. He leaned and kissed me slowly. I didn't even know why he did it. But it felt so good. When he pulled back, he was smiling.

"Does she approve me?"

I swallowed.

"She even insists"

He laughed and kissed my forehead. My stomach grumbled.

"Oh fuck."

"Let's eat, pretty girl"

I blushed like crazy and ranaway to the kitchen. He obviously followed me.

We put the pizza on the oven and I sat on the counter. He was sitting in front of me on one chair.

"When is your birthday?"

"Oh" I never thought about telling him. "Second of September."

He smiled.

"Noted"

"Are you gonna buy a gift?"

"A cute houseplant. One easy to take care of. You know, for starters."

We both laughed. The house was like a jungle.

"I'm not sure I can do it" I joked.

He laughed.

"Yeah. I better buy a plastic one".

We shared a long look.

"You had a good weekend, right?"

"It was perfect"

"And today wasn't too much?"

"Nop. I like your friends. They are nice guys."

The second road trip with Blake and Mike sitting on the back of the pink car had been so funny. The three of them were opposites but shared so many things in common. It had been Danny who introduced them and it made sense.

"Chloe asked me for your number."

"Oh fuck, I told her I would give it to her" I said clasping my hand on my mouth.

"She is nice, right?"

"She is. And Scotty is so much like you. It makes a lot of sense now. When you told me how good friends you are... I understand now. And Corey is super nice. Your friends ar good people"

"Our friends. You know that now they are your friends too"

I smiled and looked down at feet.

He got up and walked to me. Softly, he grabbed my knees and pushed my legs apart. He stand between them and I felt I was choking on the air.

I thought he would kiss me, he would start something else, but he did not. He only pressed his forehead on mine and I almost melt.

"You are cute" It spilled out of my mouth, but his giggle made me smile.

"Thank you, lady. So are you"

We stayed like that for long minutes, only breaking apart with the oven ringing.

Daniel let me jump off the counter. I opened the oven and got the pizza ready.

I set it on the table and Danny sat close to me, out knees were touching. The silence was peaceful and warm. It felt good to be just us.

"This pizza is huge." I groaned when we haven't even eaten the half of it.

"Pizza for breakfast is the best breakfast you can get"

"Does Michael agree?"

"No he doesn't."

We laughed together and I felt happy.

"I can't have more. I'm full. I always have to leave the other half frozen or in the fridge. I haven't eaten a full pizza in my whole life." I said after taking a sip of water. "It's like they only make pizza for couples. Or for married old people with a 30 something years old son that barely leaves his room"

"Well, if that's the problem I wouldn't mind to be your boyfriend"

I gasped. What? Now? I'm not ready. I need time. I can't.

In a second, his lips pressed to mine and I felt a wave of panic around me. It hit hard. My chest was feeling tight and I was already shaking.

Danny POV.

I pulled back feeling a shiver around my body. I had kissed her and she didn't kiss back. I looked at my feet, feeling ashamed and just waiting for the floor to open and shallow me.

I looked at her. Her eyes were open, full of tears and her lip was shaking. I took a step back.

Fuck, fuck. I fucked it. I was stupid. How could I do this?

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Abi. I-I shouldn't have. I'm so sorry"

She wasn't moving and I was panicking. Then the first tear fell and she gasped for air. Her chest filled and started moving fast.

"Abigail... Hey..."

Her breath got quicker and she took her hands to her face.

"Abi"

I was starting to panic. She was shaking, breathing hard and silently crying. I had done this to her. But how? We had kissed before. I already had the touch of her lips memorized.

"Abi, baby"

I tried to touch her, but she walked back.

"Abi please"

My heart was beating hard, my hands were shaking. She was having a panic attack. Something like that. I had caused this. I had caused this but didn't know how.

"Abi..."

Her back hit the wall and she finally broke down sobbing. I'd never forget that sound. She was so broken, so scared. Her hands were grabbing her t-shirt and his knees were almost of the point of giving up.

"Daniel, please" She pleaded out of breath.

"What? Tell me. Tell me what do you want?" I walked closer, leaving my hands where she could see them and giving her the chance to grab them if she wanted to.

"M-molly..."

"Do you want me to call Molly?"

She nodded.

"Fine. I will."

I grabbed my phone. I was so scared. She would faint. But I didn't know what to do.

Soon, Molly picked the phone.

"Danny! Did you alrea-"

"Molly, I need you. At Abi's house. S-she is having a panic attack or something."

She tried to walk away, pressing her hands on every surface until she reached the table.

"Okay, Danny. Help her breathing, okay?"

"She wants you here. Come please. I-I fucked up"

The phone call finished. I panted.

"D-Danny"

I saw her, looking at me with big scared eyes.

I walked to her and grabbed her body, keeping her standing just in case her legs failed her.

"It's fine. Sit and breathe with me"

She sat and her hand grabbed my shirt, pulling me down until I had knelt.

"C'mon, Abi. Breathe in"

She nodded and followed my instruction. I was just trying to reproduce Michael's step when this had happened to me.

"Breathe out"

We kept doing it for a while.

"It's fine, you are doing so good." I said touching her fingers. She gripped mine and nodded.

She let herself fall back on the chair.

"It's okay. I'm so sorry, Abi. I'm so sorry" I kissed her knuckles and my first tear fell. She closed her eyes and breathed in deeper.

Then she calmed and completely closed down. I saw how she turned her body away from me and her hand left mine. I fell my whole world falling apart. After the most perfect two days, it was done. She stayed like that, ignoring me until I heard the door opening.

"Get out" She was furious.

I didn't even had time to move, a hand pulled me and I almost fall flat on my ass.

"Get the fuck out, Ricciardo"

"Molly..."

"Leave."

She pushed me far from Abi and hugged her.

"I don't want you here when I come out"

They walked away from me and went to Abi's bedroom.

I didn't want to leave. I wanted to explain Molly what happened. I wanted to tell her that I meant no harm. I couldn't leave because if I did everything would be over. And I couldn't lose Abi. Not now that everything was going perfectly. Not after the weekend.

So I waited. I sat on the sofa and picked my nails. I waited for long minutes, hearing Abi crying from the other side of the door and wanting nothing more than to run there and hug her. I had done this to her, I wanted to be the one who solved it. I wanted to help her.

I didn't notice how my own tears were falling to the carpet until I heard the door. I looked up and they clowded my sight. Harshly, I run my fist over my eyes.

"What are you still doing here?"

"How is she?"

"Asleep. I told you to leave"

"Let me explain"

"No, I told you once to be careful with her. I thought that by now you'd know her. Fuck. She told you about Arnie? Huh? And even though..."

It clicked. I understood why she was so angry.

"I didn't cheat. I-I mean. We are not a couple, like officialy. But I haven't been with anyone. Not since I know her. I want her."

Molly's shoulders relaxed.

"You didn't?"

I shook my head.

"Then? She doesn't get like that for nothing?"

I felt nausea hitting.

"I-I kissed her... Listen, she kissed me there! We have been like kissing nonstop. We were fine, we have spent all this time together. She hasn't left my side. I-I thought she wanted it too and..."

"Hey. Breathe." She touched my shoulder and sat next to me. "I don't need to panic attacks in one night."

I look at her.

"I didn't want this to happen."

"Obviously you didn't want." She chuckled. "Listen... She... After what happened to Arnie she fell in this... Hole? Yeah. She was really really bad. It was hard, but she finally won and came out of it."

I frowned.

"I'm not the one who should tell you. It's on her hand. I will take her to her therapist as soon as possible."

"I can't lose her" I whispered.

"You won't. It's not what she wants. She just gets anxious sometimes. It's... Like PTS. Or something. I don't really know."

I was so confused. How could a kiss cause all of this?

"Daniel. Take it slow if you can. If you don't... Please cut it. And do it soon. I don't want to see her again like that. She needs time. She has been doing so well with you. She is really happy now."

"Molly, I..." I took a deep breath. "I can wait."

"Then wait."

"I thought today was the day." I whispered. "I didn't know this would happen. I was going to ask her to be my girlfriend."

"It's not your fault, Danny" She smiled and grabbed my hand. "There was no way you could know. But if she didn't tell you I'm no one to do it. She maybe thinks you are going to run away or something if she does."

I felt a shiver running over me. How could I run away?

"She has a low self steem. It's better now, but she doubts a lot. She thinks she is not enough for you, Danny. But hey, don't tell her I told you"

"I won't."

We stayed in silence for a while. My own thoughts eating me alive.

"Tomorrow... Send her a little text. Something. Because I know her well and she will freak out the moment she opens her eye."

I nodded. I looked at her.

"Molly"

"Yes"

"What do you do if this happens?"

She sighed.

"You did well. The first thing is helping with her breath. And then she usually closes herself. I don't really know how to explain it. She doesn't speak in a while. Basically because she is probably exhausted. Mentally exhausted. She likes to be held. She likes warm things. A blanket. She has dozens. They are everywhere." We both chuckled. It sounded like her. "The most important thing is remind her she is not alone"

I nodded. I wanted to be ready. I wanted to help her.

"Okay."

"Sorry for trying to kick you out. When you said that thing... I will cut your balls if you dare to cheat on her"

"I won't." I swallowed. "Can I tell you something?"

She nodded.

"Yesterday, right after the concert, my friend invited some people over. Abi went to sleep early, she looked tired. And... There was this girl in there."

She lift an eyebrow.

"Shh. This girl wanted something with me, I'm sure. But when I looked at her? Nothing. She was pretty, yes. And in theory I'm single. But I felt nothing. And let me tell you that I haven't got much action since I met Abi. But when I looked at this girl, I didn't even felt a what if. You know? When you have someone and see another person and go like, if I was single... "

She smiled and nodded.

"You like her a lot."

I blushed and nodded. I decided to not tell her about how we had shared that uncomfortable sofa. Abi had told me enough about Molly to know she would freak out.

"A lot."

"She will be alright. She needs a good talk, some time and then she will go back to you. Whenever she feels ready."

I smiled a bit.

"I will be waiting for her"

We fell into silence again and soon sleep hitted me. I still had a good half an hour drive home.

"I'm gonna leave."

"Yeah. I will stay here with her."

"Thank you for helping. I was loosing my shit"

"It happened to me the first time too"

We said goodbye with a hug and soon I was on my car.

I was in. I was ready for Abi. I would give her whatever she needed. I wanted to be with her.

Me: hey, Abi.

Me: I'm so sorry about tonight.

Me: I can't wait to see you.

Me: Whenever you feel ready, I'll be there for you.

Me: ❤️

Oh sweet sweet angsty stuff.

Next part: Santa Mónica.

Taglist: @controsnes   @thybulleric   @ln15  @lcuppo  @priylodhasstuff  @shadowbowgirl13   @txtflxx @scotlynaurora  @chxrryrose  @f1-incorrect-s @yearsof-war @earfquak3

I cannot stress enough how legitimately good this fanfic makes me feel, the relationship created by the writer and the connection with a fictional character are extraordinary. The way the writer shares their vision is truly incredible. I would go as far to say that if this was a physical book, there is a very high chance I would buy it.

All the love to the writer! This is a banger!

💜💜💜💜💜

The Handsome Artist (DR)

(Masterlist)

From a little plant store in Santa Monica to a luxurious and reputable tattoo parlour in West Hollywood.

Abigail Hopper was in that deep place where you think you will never love again. Right after the worst break-up of her life, she thought she had lost everything she had loved. Luckily, Molly was there. Molly was energetic and never thought thighs enough to actually regret. It was her who pushed her to West Hollywood, she got everything ready. She kind of was her cupid. She was the one who brought Daniel into her life.

Daniel was fresh air. He was the warm sun on cold days and the sea breeze at night. He was everything. She thought she would never love again. How wrong she was.

Check the tag #The Handsome Artist to see all the content posted.

All parts:

Part 1. Fidelity. 1-7-22

Part 2. Just checking. 6-7-22

Part 3. Mark your skin. 8-7-22

Part 4. Deep thinking. 15-7-22

Part 5. Plants and coffee. 24-7-22

Part 6. Beers and music. 30-7-22

Part 7. A nice dinner. 20-8-22

Part 8. Bug Eyes. 22-8-22

Part 9. The Ricciardos. 28-8-22

Part 10. Dew on the Vine. 31-8-22.

Part 11. Warm shower. 3-9-22

Part 12. Let's go, Colorado. 7-9-22

Part 13. Lavander Girl. 15-9-22

Part 14. I fucked it. 23-9-22.

Part 15. Santa Mónica. 27-9-22

Part 16. I know a place. 5-10-22

Part 17. The Hoppers. 12-10-22

Part 18. Australia. 15-10-22

Part 19. Perth. 22-10-22

Part 20. Birthday. 28-10-22

Part 21. A cabin in the coast. 16-11-22

Part 22. Moments of them. 29-11-22

Part 23. To feel loved. 20-12-22

Part 24. Is it true? 21-12-22

Part 25. Waiting. 26-12-22.

Part 26. Weddings and celebrations. 25-1-23

Part 27. Little flower. 30-1-23

Part 28. Daisy's life Pt1. 24-2-23

Part 29. Daisy's life Pt2. OUT SOON.

Epilogue. Happy ever after. OUT SOON.

Self-imposed by my passion for tattoos and love for Danny Ric, I found myself writing this. I hope you like it and enjoy it as much as I do.

Check The Handsome Artist Pinterest board for inspiration and Spotify playlist for vibes. Also, Abigail Hopper's board to know her aesthetic and how I picture her.

You and I, Forever.  - C.L

the one where you and charles navigate his high-end career while trying to stay loyal with eachother from a long distance. which proves to be harder for one certain party.

pairings: charles leclerc x fem!actress!reader, f1 drivers x fem!reader

word count: 4.6k

warnings: ANGST, LIKE HARDCORE ANGST, CRYING, YELLING, SWEARING, CHEATING, DRINKING, ASSHOLE CHARLES

PART 2

It was Heaven on Earth.

Waking up and being able to turn your head to your left, (the right was your side always has been) and seeing his face. Sleeping peacefully, stress-free. These were the few moments of relaxation and quiet the two of you got in your busy lives. The slow mornings in Monaco kept you sane in the day.

And you savoured them, every day. 

You and Charles had been together since as long as you could remember.

Well that may not be entirely accurate but that’s how you felt.

The two of you had been introduced to each other at Lando’s birthday party. You had been best friends with Lando since the day you shouted in his face at the go-kart track at the age of 6 for kicking your tires, which, according to him, had been entirely accidental. Which of course didn’t rest well with you as you continued to berate him about being rude. And when instead of shouting back he broke down in tears and apologized profusely you couldn’t help but apologise.

The rest of the day you spent clung to eachother’s side after a long period of back and forth apologies and hugs. From that day forward you too had been inseparable or however the cliché goes. And when you had ran to his home at the age of 13 with the biggest smile on your face and rambled on about how you had landed a role in the Marvel Cinematic Universe as Nick Fury’s niece who ended up with powers - he was your number one supporter. Every night he would call you no matter the time zone. He read lines with you, everything. 

And at the age of 17 when your character, Emery, died during Winter Soldier he was there to console you. He helped you get on your feet and continue to audition for roles. Which resulted in you landing multiple roles, including American Horror Story, Peaky Blinders as well as The Fantastic Beasts Trilogy which resulted in the two of you fangirling over Harry Potter. You were all ways there for each other. But over the years with both of your growing success and blossoming careers your relationship strained over time. 

So when you received the invitation in your email last year while sitting around on the set of Outer Banks you lunged at the idea of seeing your ‘Little Lando.’ as you liked to call him even when he threatened to run you over with his very own Formula One car.

Which was how you ended up at his 21st Birthday in Brazil, Rio. There the two of you spent practically the entire night catching up with each-other and eachother's lives. Minutes turned to hours in the span of seconds in your head. It was only when Carlos, Daniel and Luisnha (I miss you come back) made their way towards the two of you with the other guests in tow did you realize how long the two of you had spent together. 

“Happy Birthday Little Lando!” You beamed as everyone else laughed at the nick-name, which Lando was very much not. 

“Oh shut it.”

As he blew out the candles and everyone cheered you realized there was no knife, utensils or plates to eat with. And when you offered you were met with Daniels laugh and “We’ll eat with our hands, caveman style!”

Which was met with protests by every girl in attendance. And surprisingly Pierre. “What? I don’t want to get my outfit dirty.” 

As you left you could hear the teasing remarks thrown towards Pierre, which brought a smile on your face. The party was smaller than what you’d expect, but mostly due to the fact Lando had thrown a huge party the night before which also explained the fact that no one was drinking since everyone was probably still 75% tequila at the time. And you liked this. The music wasn’t too loud, the DJ, well there was no DJ.

There was the cheap knock-off DJ Lando instead. 

Lando claimed the reasoning for not having a DJ being that “I want this to be small, fun. And some rando mashing music and pumping his fist in the air is not what I want.” But everyone knew he wanted to be the DJ, not because they asked but by the fact that no normal non-DJ had huge 5 foot speakers and thousands of dollars of equipment just laying around. 

As you opened up cabinets collecting everything you heard a cabinet behind you open. “Guess we both had the idea for collecting plates and all huh?” He had spoken as you turned to be met with a joyful Charles gripping onto 10 or so plates with utensils stuffed in his pockets. Which was a great sight, according to you and the fact that it took every bone in your body to not just start bursting out with laughter at the sight in front of you.

“I guess we did!”

“What’s that Western saying? Great people think the same?”

You giggled as you smiled back, “Something like that.”

After the cake cutting and all the rest of the night was spent laughing, dancing and skinny dipping. In that order. All night. Only the drivers and their girlfriends stayed back since most of them were staying in Rio for the race but the rest of his friends were returning back home in the next day or two. So after a few tearful goodbyes (mostly because of the alcohol as well as the fact that it would most likely be a while until they were all together again) the rest of you were knocked out. The yacht was more than big enough to accommodate all 20 or so of you. 

Originally, Lily, Carmen and you were going to sleep together but the two of them ended up passed out in bedrooms with their boyfriends. Lando and Luis were together, somewhere, Isa and Carlos and so on. And since someone up there had it out for you, Charles and you ended up sharing. Which you were now eternally grateful for since that resulted in drunken thoughts and late night talking. 

(harry styles reference there 😏)

In the morning the pair of you had to explain to Carlos, Daniel, Max and Pierre (which is seriously the worst quartet to find the two of you) how you ended up with your dress hanging on for life whilst draped over the window sill which lead to a very watery grave if it was windy but thankfully the deck was below. And not only that but how your bra ended up falling on Lando’s face as he was calling the two of you the night prior to let you know that Luishna and himself were sleeping on the hammock. And (yes there’s somehow more) how your thong ended up stuffed in the back pocket of Charles’s jeans, which were fully displayed on the floor. 

And if that was bad, Lando’s reaction made theirs's seem like they welcomed the two of you as a couple with open arms. 

“Are you fucking kidding me? Charles, my best friend! You fucked my best friend on my birthday! While I was 5 feet away? And you. Didn’t think I forgot about you Y/n did you? Why the hell would you do that to me? One of my best mates. What is wrong with the two of you?” 

After that bombshell it took quite literally everyone else on the yacht besides Charles and yourself to calm him down. After he did it took you about three hours after those 2 hours of cool down time to explain to him that it was perfectly normal for people to hook up, but it wasn’t exactly like that with the two of you. You told him how you and Charles talked. For hours after everyone went to bed. About every and anything. Pain. Love. Family.

You were yearning to learn anything you could about him and he was the same.

You had never felt this way before. You’d heard about him before, and like everyone else who had any clue about Formula One as well as the Charles Leclerc you wanted to know more. And you learnt so much more.

From his favourite food to his best friends to his biggest regrets and so on. You told him everything too, from your favourite food, to friends to regrets. You felt at ease with him. His eyes calmed you in a way you had never known. The feeling of lying your head on his chest and listening to him laugh thrilled you. 

Even if it took a few blank stares and a bit of awkward silences for the rest of the day Lando eventually came around to the idea of the two of you together.

“Mon amour? Es-tu debout?”

Are you up?

“Mm-hm.”

“Good.”

“Nous devons nous préparer. Je dois aller travailler et toi aussi.”

We have to get ready, I have work and so do you.

“Je sais, donne-moi juste une minute pour te regarder dans le soleil.“

I know, just give me a minute to look at you in the sun.

“Charles!” 

“Mon ange tu es absolument magnifique pouvez-vous me reprocher de vouloir regarder?”

 Mon ange you look absolutely gorgeous, can you blame for wanting to stare?

“You’ve been staring at me every morning for the past 2 years get over it.” You giggled as you made an attempt to get up, which was foiled as he pulled you back into bed, snuggling his nose into your neck. 

“First of all our 2 year anniversary is actually in 9 days. It’s only the fourth of November. Secondly, Je ne t'oublierai jamais mon amour. Jamais.”

I’ll never get over you my love. Never. 

“You’re cheesy. Now get up and get dressed babe.” You said as you kissed him on the cheek and made your way to the bathroom. 

You were dressed, showered and clean. 

Charles had just stumbled into the bathroom and brushed his teeth. He threw on a hoodie and sweats, grabbed his bag, slipped his shoes on and was sitting on the bed scrolling on Instagram. 

You were putting on mascara when he came behind you and slung his arms around your neck per usual as he rested his head on yours. 

“God you’re gorgeous.” He gushed. “Thank you monsieur.”  - Mister.

“Mister? Oh so I’m mister now huh?” He said as he grinned before tickling your sides.

“Oh! O-okay I’m sorry! Charles- Ah!” You couldn’t stop laughing as you swatted his arms with your hairbrush before he finally stopped. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. But at least you learnt your lesson right?” He smiled before getting slapped on the back of his head, “Merde! Ow.” - Shit

“C’mere.” You said as you kissed his cheek. “Seriously? You didn’t even brush your hair.” You spoke disappointed in him. Bracing your hairbrush you softly pushed him back to sit on the countertop before brushing it out. 

These were the moments you cherished. The sweet ones. The ones in which nothing mattered besides the man standing in front of you with the stupid grin on his face as he made inappropriate jokes after being told to fuck himself to which he combatted with “Why fuck my self? Especially when you can fuck m-”

After a few more minutes of messing around and scolding your boyfriend for purposefully messing up his hair again You finally ended up in the car and off to your respective destinations. You were in Maranello for a movie shoot and Charles was here to work as well, but it was your last day in Maranello as now, ironically enough you were off to Mexico for the film. You had tried to get the production team to move the dates around and film in Mexico first so that you could support Charles but that didn’t go anywhere. 

He dropped you off at the airport but not before embarrassing you as you were waiting to grab a coffee as he shouted across the security check-in in Italian, “Ti amo così tanto mia colomba. Sei fantastica e la migliore ragazza che potrei chiedere. Buona fortuna al lavoro!”

I love you so much my dove. You are amazing and the best girlfriend I could ask for. Good luck at work!

Which would have been fine despite the fact that he didn’t say it in his own language, French, he spoke in Italian. While in the middle of an Italian Airport. Which (Lucky you) had Italian fans of Ferrari as well as yours around who had to film it. Now you were lying, it wasn’t that embarrassing, you admired his love for you, it just would’ve been better in private.

But then again how could Charles upset you?

After the exhausting 13 hour flight as well as hour spent on the plane waiting for the Jetway to be attached to the plane after difficulties beforehand and then the 2 hours it took for baggage claim and security?

Safe to say you were done for the day. 

On the way back you couldn’t help but grin. Your interaction a the airport with Charles had gone viral, Tiktok, Instagram everything. The comments made your heart swell and even on Twitter the two of you were trending. 

You even reposted the interaction from a fan of yours and tagged Charles. Seeing your fans being so civil with each other made you happy. At first the two of you were about 2 months into the relationship and had no clue how your fans would take it. Especially the more, uhm, passionate, (crazy) ones you could say.

The next couple of days were a blur, Wake up at 4:30 am. 

Out of the house by 5 am, 3-4 hour to two hour long breaks and lunch breaks.

Work until 11:00 pm. 

It was a tedious process but being surrounded with so many great people and friends made it all better. 

13th November, Lando’s Birthday. 

Also Charles and your 2 Year Anniversary.

You were depressed the entire day. The set was currently closed due to a Covid scare from a Crew Member which resulted in the delay of production for over 2 weeks. Which was okay with you, but you told you couldn’t travel until the Crew Member tested negative which was what you were told yesterday. And the crew member, Emery, had texted you saying she was negative, encouraging you to fly to Charles to support him. 

And after a few discussions with your own team and other actors who were apparently flying back to their family for Thanksgiving, which you didn’t celebrate since you were British. And again after debating with your team and doing a bit of research yourself of price tickets for flights you decided to treat yourself with a private jet instead.

 If your boyfriend has a jet and he offers it, what are you supposed to say? 

No?

Hell no. Or uh, hell yes! You boarded on Tuesday night around 11:00 pm since you had called Arthur to have the plane brought over only about 20 hours before. So on short notice a night time flight was the best idea.

You arrived at the hotel Charles was staying at around 9 in the morning. Charles was already gone and you decided to settle in then. You unpacked your overnight bag as you found it unnecessary to pack a lot if you were returning a few days later. Plus you could always buy more clothes if needed.

Security escorted you to the grid as you tried to draw the least amount of attention and Eleven bodyguards weren’t exactly the best way to stay out of the spotlight. So you resorted to only 2 bodyguards, both women, both dressed in merch, same as you. You came through the fan area rather than drivers/workers. And once you had made it through Charles’s PR manager directed you to hospitality and to Carlos’s driver room where you stayed for the race. 

You were planning on surprising him at the race but seeing your boyfriend on top of the podium and having champagne sprayed on him from multiple directions had you dying on the inside because of how fucking gorgeous he looked. So you opted for surprising him at the party instead.

It was around 5:23 pm and Charles went straight from the track to his hotel room whilst you were still at the paddock, waiting for Isa so the two of you could go out for a very late lunch, and by ‘out’ you meant the Williams Hospitality since Lily was there and Alex had an amazing P6 finish, so all of you were in great moods. A bit of calm before the storm. The storm being the absolute insanity of  Celebration Parties. 

“I still don’t get why you didn’t go out there. If Carlos was on the podium look like a fucking Greek, or in the boys’ case, Monegasque and Spanish Gods? I would’ve probably jumped on Carlos in front of everyone.” Isa joked as you smiled. “You kinda did. You forgetting this was a 1-2 finish or something?”

“Oops, guess I forgot.” “How could you forget? I certainly didn’t, I still remember all the things you promised to do to m-” Isa slapped Carlos’s arm, “Carlos! Jesus shut it!” Isa blushed as she buried her head in her hands. 

“Ai, I’m kidding mi amor.” Carlos sweetly smiled as he kissed her forehead. “The party has already started. Everyone’s making their way over to Le Ana’s Pub, Club whatever. Want us to give you a ride? We might be a little late since I need to change and Isa wants to as well.” You nodded, wanting to change from the jeans and white corset top which to be honest was starting to constrict your airways. 

The pair of them got into their car and pulled around to the private exit in order to avoid anyone noticing you were present. By the time you pulled in, changed and were all ready it was around 8. All three of you decided to take showers and Carlos and Isa might have started to fool around a bit.

Early celebrations meant for late nights.

It took your trio over 35 minutes to get Le Ana. Yes it was 20 minutes away but Carlos was already slightly tipsy and so was Isa. The two of them coincidentally forgot their wallets/purses about 10 minutes in. And then the two of them needed McDonalds even though you told them they could get food at the club instead. 

You felt amazing. 

You were wearing a gorgeous Ferrari red bodycon dress which looked amazing too. 

So imagine how you felt when you walked in shortly behind Carlos and Isa after trying to explain to Valet that the red Ferrari was in fact yours but since he was a stupid 50 year old man who refused to believe in a women being able to afford such a car you decided to park yourself. And after talking to the word ‘headache’ personified you caught a glimpse of your boyfriend, quite literally glowing under the flashing lights in Champagne, with the biggest grin on his face whilst brushing strands of hair behind an insanely beautiful woman’s ear. 

You felt like scratching your dress off. The air in the room was apparently non-existent since you couldn’t grasp the concept of breathing. Your chest was closing in on your heart, clawing at it, attacking her. 

Just as Charles was attacking the neck of the woman on his lap. His hands hastily making their way up her thigh, as if time was running out for him. As if someone was holding a stopwatch, timing his swift actions.

You felt a hand on your shoulder and you swatted it away immediately. Letters were trying to form in your head as whoever was with you had words spewing out of their mouth like a fountain. Although, you were quite content with the idea of letting those words, that fountain drown you then and there. 

But of course someone was again laughing at you from up there. Your life literally seemed like a movie. A novella. Just as the couple got settled, BOOM! Curveball. Right now you felt like banging your head against a curb instead.

“Y/n!” 

You finally let the words sink in.

“Are you okay? Took you a while to get here, no?” 

Turning to your right you were met with a smiling Pierre. He himself had reasons to be happy. He somehow managed to finish P3. Max and Lewis had managed to take themselves out at turn 3, along the way Daniel locked up, causing his collision with barriers at a very unlucky time as Lando was coming speeding round and managed to also get caught up in the pile up. This gave the best of the rest a chance to snag some very pretty points up. 

“Y/n/n? What is i-” Pierre’s jaw was most likely broken at the speed it dropped open. “Oh that little fucker!” Those words managed to bring you back to reality as you watched Pierre walk over to Charles, and you sure as hell didn’t miss how his hands were now in fists. 

You ran after him of course, but didn’t catch up in time as when you got there the woman your boyfriend was with was now standing to the side, eyes glossy and her hands clapped over her mouth. A crowd was beginning to draw in as Pierre yelled at his best friend.

 “Vous plaisantez j'espère? Es-tu tellement ivre que tu ne réalises pas que cette salope n'est pas ta petite amie? Putain, réponds-moi! Je me fiche que tu sois ma meilleure amie, elle est aussi ma meilleure amie. Je jure devant Dieu que je vais te botter le cul Charles!”

Are you kidding me? Are you so drunk you don't realize that bitch isn’t your girlfriend? Fucking hell answer me! I don't care if you're my best friend, she's also my best friend. I swear to god I'll kick your ass Charles. 

Daniel, Carlos and George were there in an instant, pulling Pierre off of Charles whilst the rest of the drivers and team members were dispersing the crowd. “What the hell is going on? Pierre what the fuck!” Daniel shouted as the party was back in swing, music blaring, people dancing etc.

“That little fuck head was groping some random chick while Y/n was standing across the room!” Pierre explained whilst trying to not lunge at his best friend. 

“Seriously Charles?” Daniel asked as Charles felt himself turn red, “Yeah.” He managed to mumble before Daniel scoffed. “What the hell is wrong with you? Just because you’re drunk doesn’t mean you go around kissing random girls when you’ve been in a relationship for over 2 years!”

You didn’t know what to do. You were just standing there, as Charles desperately tried to make eye contact with you. Which was difficult since Pierre was right next to you staring daggers into his head. Everybody was shouting. And honestly the only voice you wanted to hear right now was Charles. You felt like he should apologize after everything at least. No, he owed you an apology.

“Charles.” 

Somehow that managed to shut everyone up. The miracle was mostly how everyone managed to hear you. 

“No need to shout I’m right here.” Oh.

“Outside. Now.” And that had him up on his feet. Good. He still remembered when you weren’t asking. 

You were hoping the wind would help ease you. And you were right. As you leaned over the balcony you felt the cool breeze blow through your hair. Almost as if it was being brushed. 

“You wore the dress I got you.” 

You chuckled, “Yup, I decided to wear it to surprise you. Back when we still loved each other. When we were loyal. Do you remember those days? Or has that model managed to erase me? Our memories together?” 

“Don’t say that. You know that’s not true.” 

“Actually I don’t. I left you, for only a few days. And it only took you two bottles of champagne and an hour without me to forget the two years of us being together. The love we shared. The early mornings. The late nights where it was just us, staring at each other, while nothing else mattered when we had one another. The lazy days where we lounged around, watched movies, cooked together, laughed together, everything. Together.”

“Y/n please.”

“You remember our 6 month anniversary? We were sitting in the park, there was nobody around. The sun was setting and we were having the best time. Low music playing, you read to me, with that stupid smile on your face as you couldn’t stop laughing at my singing. The sprinklers turned on and we laughed, you put the book away and looked at me for a bit, then you pulled me in and told me-”

“Toi et moi, pour toujours.“

“You and I, forever.”

“Or our one year anniversary? We watched Christmas movies in front of the fire place? In the morning we work up and there were fire place ashes everywhere?”

“Y/n, I didn’t mean it. I promise. You know me, you know me! I love you please, please don’t do this. 2 years, 2 years of you and me. And that’s not enough. I need more, I love you so much you don’t know. I was lonely and I know that’s not an excuse but-” 

“You’re right. It’s not an excuse. If you were lonely you could’ve called. You know I would pick up straight away. No matter where I was. And if I didn’t? Well that’s not possible, I always do. That’s how much I love you. I would drop everything for you. But you would never do the same for me!”

“I would! Mi amor I would. Anything! Everything. You mean more than-”

“Racing?”

“What?” Charles looked as if you had slapped him, which you were about 4 seconds from doing so.

“Racing. I believe you would give up everything. But would you give it up? Racing? Formula One or me? You’ve always put me in second place, I always put you first. This can’t work Charles. I need someone who treats me the same way I treat them.” 

“I treat you like a fucking princess! I get you everything you want, whenever you want. Jewellery, dresses everything! And you can’t even get over me focusing on my career are you fucking joking?” 

You didn’t know when your laughs turned to sobs but they did. 

“Y/n, I- fuck. I’m drunk okay? A-and I don’t mean it.”

“Please, Charles.” You sobbed as he dropped to his knees, wrapping his arms around your waist as he kissed your stomach. 

“I love you. I love you. I love you.” He mumbled as he continued kissing you.

“No stop, stop, stop it. I can- can’t breathe. Please let me go.” 

“I’m sorry, I’ll do anything, please.”

You got his arms off you as he got to his feet, “I can’t. Charles, I wish you the best I really do. I love you.” You said as you pulled him in, on your tip-toes kissing his forehead as tears rolled down his cheeks. 

You pulled away, knowing that if you stayed any longer he’d probably convince you to stay with him. 

“I’m sorry.”

And then and there your heart shattered. Walking away from him, you didn’t turn back. Even though your heart was begging you, one last look. Even when you heard his sobs, as much as you felt like running back, kissing him, hugging him, telling him the two of you could work it out, you continued walking away.

Charles was slumped on the floor, knees to chest as he mumbled into his knees.

“You and I, forever.”

The second you got into your car you cried. Panic attack after panic attack, you felt like screaming. 

Your last straw was the text you received.

charlie 🏎️<3

We didn’t get to have our anniversary.

Love of my life | D.R.

Daniel Ricciardo x younger!reader

Summary: What happens when you confess your profound love to the person whose heart you broke? How fragile is the hope of reconciliation?

Warnings: comforting angst??? (idk even im in my feels)

Word count: ~1.2K

^^

“Hiding from me?” the velvety voice behind you felt more familiar than you’d like it to.

“Should I?” you turned your eyes away from the dark ocean before you and met his eyes. Gosh he looked handsome and you could feel your body react to him, still the same as it was, gentle shock waves weaving through your fingertips.

“God I hope not…” he sat down beside you on the straw beach furniture. You were trying to keep your gaze on the horizon of the ocean where water seemed to bleed into the dark night sky and become one.

You could hear him take a deep breath, it was shaky and an uncomfortable feeling settled in your gut as if foreseeing that his following words would remind you of something you had been trying to keep buried for the last 5 months.

“I didn’t think I’d see you here tonight…” he spoke out softly, his eyes on your silhouette, encaged by the silver glory of the full moon you looked untouchable. And he knew that you were untouchable to him, no matter how much his palms seemed to have thoughts of their own and wished to just reach out to you, and relish in the touch of your silky skin just like he’d done months ago.

“Why not? You know I didn’t attend all those parties just because of you,” you held your stare stoic, letting yourself get lost in the starry night sky, counting the stars only so you’d hold yourself back from latching on the man sitting beside you.

Nothing could have you forget the day you’d met him. Ironically it was a party that you had only attended because you were dying to catch a glimpse of the charming man that he was. Luckily, at least that’s what you thought at that very moment, you had caught his eye and soon enough you were carrying his heart in your hands and he was carrying yours. Although now after everything, you believe you might have been wrong about the later…

“Y/n… I just want to say-”

“Please don’t say it, don’t apologize again,” you turned to him almost instantly which left him speechless, your eyes sparkling in the moonlight reminiscent of the various jewels he used to clasp around your neck and the supple kisses he’d leave there throughout the day, but the jewels that adorned your eyes now weren’t a consequence of a blissful time together, “I will not hear it again… I do not need to be reminded of that… time”, you lowered your head trying to catch your breath and the lonely tears from falling.

“Baby,” he kept his hands secured in tight fists, too easy to lose control now that he could see tears escaping out of your eyes and cascading down your cheeks. He still remembers the salty streaks from the last time he’d been this close to you. How could he ever forget when the pain he’s been carrying in his chest for so long never denied itself. You had given his heart back to him, but you sure took a piece of it for yourself before that, though how could he blame you when he had done the same… to have the smallest part of you and suffer rather than have no memory of you was and would always be Daniel’s first and only choice.

“Daniel,” your eyes traveled back to his warm eyes, the same one’s that had made you all the promises of a perfect tomorrow. One that never came. One that you still let yourself dream about whenever the air smelled like the cologne you’d gifted him, the one he was still wearing now…

Looking at him you wished you could hate him, you wished to be physically repulsed by the man in front of you, maybe that would help you walk away now and continue living as you once had. Striving for the brightest most delightful future, without looking back at the old dark days, but he has possessed your mind, you can no longer make a step without seeing him there, what if’s about the past clouding your future. How could he sit there and give you those eyes… those gorgeous sad eyes. You bit back your lip. You could no longer kiss his sad eyes and see them light back up after.

“Y/n… you were the love of my life,” he accepts the torture that is to come his way, he knows he deserves it for the crime he just committed. Tears were fully running down your cheeks now, large droplets falling into the sand beneath your feet and disappearing right away, like they were never there…

“Why are you doing this to me, Daniel?” you instinctively covered your face with your palms as sobs made your shoulders tremble, hiding the tears from him even if he’s seen them already. You hated nothing more than for him to see you cry.

“I just… I felt that you had to know, because I never told you how much I actually loved you. I treated you so wrong for a very long time and I am to blame for that… I was the shitty older guy who took advantage of someone who didn’t know what she was doing…”

“That was the problem, Daniel. You always viewed me as a child…I am young, but I am not a kid and I can make decisions for myself. You might regret me, but I know the choices I made and I have no remorse over them,” your heart ached. How unfortunate is it to meet the love of your life and understand that they never truly saw you as their equal.

“The only thing I regret is not doing more to get to know you and… leaving you behind… I was in the wrong, so please do not cry darling…” his voice sounded so different, he was breaking from the inside out seeing you this way. He leaned closer to you, his warm palms encompassing your wrists to reveal your face to him.

Two pairs of teary eyes stared into one another.

The both of you took in a shaky breath in, which finally broke the suffocating tension and helped your lips ease into a simple smile. Daniel wiped at your cheeks, his touch ghostly light, removing the salty puddles, before gracing your forehead with an effortless kiss.

“I’m sorry too, Daniel,” you leaned back just so you could once again let yourself go and drown in his warm eyes, completely forgetting your morals and bringing back the buried feelings you couldn’t not tell him, “You were also the love of my life…”

Now it was Daniel’s turn to let the tears flow. And he did. He wished he had you, all of you, he wished to cry on your shoulder whenever a race went wrong, he wished to have your attentive hands run through his curls and soothe him when the air seemed to get too heavy. Most importantly he wished he had said it sooner, the short ‘L’ word, because if he had, you’d be home, tangled in bed together with big tranquil smiles on your faces.

Instead you two were crying on a beach together, reminiscing on what would have been if it could have been. But it was enough for Daniel, even if he was crying, at the very least he was crying with you… the love of his life…

^^

A.N. loving older men is not a hobby, it's a lifestyle<3

if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow

★ : summary :: when they lose a race ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: hurt/comfort; angst; fluff ★ : word count :: 2.7k

Max Verstappen

Max had never felt so distant from you. He had the win in his bag, he started good and was going to give it his all but was forced to retire due to a sudden engine failure while leading the race.

He was rightfully disheartened. The post-race meeting only added to his frustration as blame was thrown around instead of taking responsibility. It only got worse when he walked out of it with a, ‘This is such a waste of time.’

As he ranted in the car, his anger palpable, you listened silently, and caressed his hand when, had gotten a call from his dad.

“Just let it ring,” you whispered from the passenger seat. Your attempt was futile though before he picked up the call and put it on bluetooth in his ear.

You waited until you reached home before discreetly ending the call, giving Max a moment to compose himself. He didn’t let you hear anything but as he sat in his seat, rubbing his face to get rid of his emotions, you knew the conversation had affected him deeply.

Opening his car door, you pulled him out using his hand before getting home before you both took a shower in silence, allowing Max the space to process. It wasn't until you were tucked under the covers, clean and warm, that he finally spoke.

"I just hate feeling like I let everyone down," Max confessed, his voice heavy with guilt.

"You didn't let anyone down, Max,” you reassured him, kissing the top of his hand. “You gave it your all out there.”

"I still feel like I'm constantly disappointing everyone," Max muttered, his voice thick with frustration.

"You're not a disappointment, Max. You're a phenomenal driver, and sometimes things just don't go our way.”

"It's hard to believe that sometimes," Max admitted, his gaze distant and you realized what exactly he was thinking about right now.

"Your dad's words don't define you, Max. You're so much more than that," you said firmly, refusing to let him internalize the negativity.

"It's just… I've always looked up to him, you know? His opinion matters," Max confessed, his tone tinged with sadness.

"But you're your own person, Max. And you're incredible in your own right," you reminded him, squeezing his hand gently.

"I know, but… it still hurts," Max admitted, his shoulders slumping with the weight of it all.

"I wish I could shield you from all of this," you murmured, feeling a pang of helplessness. Your boyfriend nodded softly, looking so so so small that it was physically hurting you to even keep looking at him, his eyes reflecting the turmoil within.

"Hey, look at me," you said, gently tilting his chin up to meet your gaze. "You are loved, Max. Don't ever forget that." "Thanks, Y/N. I needed to hear that," Max replied, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"Anytime, Max. I'm here for you, through the highs and the lows," you said earnestly, offering him a comforting embrace.

He looked conflicted for a second and you were sure whatever he was about to say was going to officially break your heart into two. Max's voice was barely above a whisper when he admitted it, his expression pained,"It's just… seeing them celebrate my failure, it stings."

"I know it's tough seeing those celebrations, Max, but remember, those people celebrating are just haters who can't accept that someone is doing better than them," you said firmly, trying to inject some perspective into the situation. "Their joy comes from a place of envy, not genuine happiness. Don't let their negativity dampen your spirit."

"I hope you're right," Max said, his voice tinged with doubt. "Thanks for always being there, babe. I don't know what I'd do without you," Max said sincerely, his eyes reflecting gratitude.

"You'll never have to find out, Max. I'll always be by your side.”

Lewis Hamilton

Your heart dropped the moment you saw the tire puncture Lewis’ car in the second last lap of the race. His frustration and curses echoed through the headphones, reaching you with a painful clarity.

“Don’t tell me to calm down! This is all so shit!” Lewis’s distorted voice cried through the radio. “I was so fucking close!”

As much as it hurt you to listen to this, you decided to keep your emotions at bay so you could handle your boyfriend’s better. Silently making your way through the people in the paddock to the back.

The chaos and disappointment from everyone forcing your chest to hurt a little. The only thought in your mind was how Lewis was probably feeling much much worse than you right now.

You heard his car before you saw him, and when you did, the defeat etched on his face made you want to cry. Lewis seemed drained and defeated, devoid of the usual fire.

“Baby?” You called, catching his attention. He nodded at someone before making his way towards you. Pulling you into a less crowded area before wrapping his arms around your shoulder.

"I don’t think I can face the interviews and media circus after this," he confessed, his breath warm against your neck.

"Should I go get the getaway car ready?" You joked, delighted to hear a small huff from his mouth.

“Can’t really leave before that though,” Lewis replied. “I’m beat, just wish it wasn’t this close to winning.”

Realizing he needed encouragement, you took a deep breath and spoke softly.

"Lewis, it's incredibly tough luck to have a tire blowout so close to the finish line, especially when you were leading so strongly," you said, feeling his grip tighten around you. "But these moments, they test your resilience and determination."

He nodded, his shoulders relaxing a fraction as you continued to rub his back.

"I know it's hard, Lewis, but remember, every setback is just a setup for a comeback," you whispered soothingly.

"I just had my heart set on this win," he murmured, disappointment evident in his voice.

"I know, love, but sometimes things don't go as planned," you replied, offering a comforting squeeze.

"It's like the universe has it out for me today," Lewis said with a bitter chuckle.

"Maybe it's just testing how badly you want it," you suggested optimistically. "Well, it's certainly made its point," he said, a hint of bitterness lingering.

You were about to speak again when he interrupted.

"I just wish it had been enough."

"It will be next time," you said confidently, refusing to let him dwell on the defeat.

"I hope you're right," Lewis said, a hint of determination creeping back into his voice. "Thanks for always believing in me.”

"Always, Lewis. That's what lovers are for," you said, smiling warmly at him, admiring his eyes that had some of their shine back intact.

Carlos Sainz

The relief you felt when Carlos walked out of the safety car before making his way towards you was indescribable. From the moment his car collided with another due to a racing incident until now, with his arms around your shoulders, you hadn't taken a single calm breath.

It was probably less brutal than what was shown on the screen, given that it happened so fast that none of the drivers had even processed what was happening. Still the incident had left you with a knot of dread in your stomach.

Carlos was okay, you repeated to yourself, but it didn't quell the pounding of your heart or the trembling of your hands. You were trying to stay composed but it was really hard while your boyfriend talked to someone from the team, frustrated that he had to retire so soon.

"Hey, at least you're still in one piece," you pointed out, trying to inject a bit of humor into the situation but it sounded dry and that was when Carlos took a good look at you, his gaze sharpening as he realized how shaken you were. "Babe, are you alright?" Carlos asked, his concern evident in his voice as he reached out to touch your trembling hand.

"I'm fine, just a bit shaken," you admitted, forcing a shaky smile as you tried really hard to stay in the present and not let your brain run rampant.

"I'm so sorry you had to see that," Carlos said, his eyes filled with regret as he pulled you into a comforting embrace. Knowing that he would’ve been the same if it was the other way around.

"I promise I'll be more careful out there," Carlos vowed, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head.

"I'm just glad you're okay," you whispered, burying your face in his chest as you finally allowed yourself to let go of the tension you had been holding.

"It's not your fault, Carlos. These things happen in racing-”

"I know, but I hate putting you through this," Carlos said, his voice filled with remorse. "Let's forget about the race for now, okay? We'll focus on us."

"That sounds perfect," you agreed, feeling a sense of peace wash over you as you leaned into his warmth, longing to put the ordeal behind you.

"I love you so much," Carlos said earnestly, his eyes filled with love as he looked at you. Hands holding you tight against him, grounding you so you could understand that he was real and wasn’t going anywhere.

"Let's get out of here and grab some dinner, just the two of us," Carlos proposed, eager to shift your focus away from the day's events as he led you towards the exit. Mentally making a list of things he would tell you to take your mind off of what happened today.

Charles Leclerc

You found yourself seething almost as much as Charles after yet another podium slipped away due to a messed up pit stop. It lasted more than a fucking forever at such a pivotal moment in the race.

It really made you wonder whether his team was even working with him or deliberately against him to make sure that neither of them could score more points. He had opted to stay silent, shutting out the media and team meetings, and unfortunately, that meant withdrawing from you too.

“Charles?” You asked after giving him ample time to process the race in the sitting room all alone like he requested.

He simply hummed before taking a sip of whatever his glass held before you carefully took it from his hand and put it on the table. Crawling into his lap to make sure he knew he could lean on you.

"This isn't the solution," you whispered, pointing to yourself. "Talk to me. Mid-life crises are lighter when shared."

“I don’t think I have the brain to make a correct decision ever.”

"Hey, don't say that," you said firmly, looking into his eyes with a mixture of concern and determination. "You're one of the most talented drivers out there, Charles. One pit stop mishap doesn't change that," you assured, brushing a stray hair from his face.

"But it keeps happening, Y/N," Charles replied, his voice heavy with frustration. "I know, love, and it's unfair. But you can't let it define you," you said, cupping his cheek in your hand.

"I understand how frustrating it is, Charles," you said, your voice soft but determined. "But dwelling on what went wrong won't change anything."

"What do you suggest, then?" Charles asked, a hint of desperation in his tone. "Let's analyze what happened today. Break it down step by step," you suggested, gently guiding him to a more constructive approach. "Let's start with the pit stop. What went wrong there?" you prompted, encouraging him to identify the specific issues.

"It was a miscommunication between the crew members," Charles recalled, his brow furrowing with concentration.

"Okay, so how can we prevent that from happening in the future?"

"Maybe we need to implement clearer communication protocols," Charles suggested, a spark of hope flickering in his eyes.

"That sounds like a solid plan. Let's discuss it with your team tomorrow," you said, nodding in agreement.

"But what if they don't listen to me?" Charles wondered, his confidence wavering.

"You're their driver, Charles. Your input is invaluable. They'll listen," you assured him, offering a reassuring smile.

"I feel a bit better now," Charles admitted, a hint of relief in his tone. “I was just so lost, I should've talked to you a bit sooner.” Your boyfriend whispered before leaning down and dropping a soft lingering kiss on your lips, conveying what words couldn't. "I'm lucky to have you, Y/N."

"And I'm lucky to have you, Charles. We make a great team," you replied, squeezing his hand reassuringly.

Lando Norris

The usual smile was off of Lando’s face. He faced an unavoidable collision with another car in the chaotic start of the race, resulting in damage to his car and an early retirement. Though he tried to maintain a facade of normalcy, the tension in his jaw and the sharpness in his gaze betrayed his true emotions.

Lando typically a laid back playful guy who was always joking around, had retreated into himself on this dismal day, with even the reporters giving him a wide berth. No one has seen him this dejected before and it was killing you.

However, as soon as the race concluded, it was clear why he was keeping up appearances. Lando pecked your cheek and told you to stay put before following the rookie who had collided with his car.

Alarm bells rang in your head and you were right behind him, stopping him using his shoulder.

“Babe, maybe it's best to cool down before confronting him.” You saw him sigh and open his mouth to retort but you were quicker. “Walk with me.”

You understood him obviously, knowing that the incident was beyond his control and shattered his hopes for a strong finish.

"I can't just let it slide, Y/N," Lando said, his voice tight with frustration as he glanced back towards the rookie's garage.

“I understand, Lando, but lashing out won't change anything," you said gently, placing a comforting hand on his arm, relieved when he finally started walking away.

"I just feel so helpless," Lando admitted, his shoulders slumping with defeat.

"You're not helpless, Lando. You're just taking a moment to process everything," you reassured him, placing a gentle kiss against his lips.

"It's just hard to stay positive when everything feels like it's falling apart," Lando confessed, his usual optimism dimmed by disappointment. "I just hate feeling like I'm at the mercy of circumstances.”

"I know, love. But remember, you're not alone in this. We'll figure it out together," you assured him, intertwining your fingers with his. “You, me and the team. He’s going to face penalties anyway.”

"I just wish I could turn back time and avoid that collision," He sighed, letting you drag him to a park nearby for a walk.

"I understand, love. But dwelling on what could have been won't change the present. Let's focus on what we can do now," you suggested, leading him away from the chaos of the race track.

"But what if this affects my standings in the championship?" He wondered aloud, his brow furrowing with worry, a pout evident on his face.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it, babe. Right now, let's focus on taking care of you," you said, your voice filled with determination. "Let's just take this walk and clear our heads, okay? If you still want to talk to him later, I’ll support you."

He was extremely grateful that you pulled him away at the time because not even an hour later, the rookie approached Lando and apologized for his mistake.

( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

baby, would i still be your lover?

★ : summary :: when he accidentally insults you during an argument ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: angst ★ : word count :: 2.9k ★ : a/n :: as much as i love making the crack texts, i'm just an angst addict 😔

Max Verstappen

Everyone, people who weren’t even in Max’s close proximity, knew that he was impulsive and a little reckless. With you, on the contrary, Max was usually a think first, act later kind of a lover. That wasn’t to say that when arguments happened, they were a pretty sight to look at.

It was a single thing that you said which suddenly turned into a huge blown out argument, leaving your head throbbing as Max continued to vent his frustrations about unrelated issues.

"You're so hot-headed, you can't even have a normal conversation without blowing up."

"Attacking me now, are you?" Max retorted, his tone defensive.

He was quick to bite back and the ball in your throat made it scratch-y to talk. You were sure that your eyes were welling up with tears but he was too far away to see it.

"I'm just stating the truth.” You started after taking a shuddering breath. “Every time we talk, it turns into a fight because you can't control your temper."

"Well, maybe if you didn't push all my buttons, we wouldn't be here."

He was talking in the same decibel at least and for a second you had hope that everything would be better. Then his words registered and the hope vanished as well.

"I'm not the one who flies off the handle at the slightest provocation!"

You had to stop and take another breath, otherwise, you were going to start crying and this conversation was inevitably going to get left in between because Max wasn’t an asshole who was okay with his girlfriend crying just because he was angry.

"You know what? I'm sick of your constant criticism."

"And I'm sick of walking on eggshells around you!"

He took a moment to say the next thing. The silence indicating that he was thinking it over first. Max's next words hung in the air, heavy with implication.

"Fine, maybe we should just call it quits then."

The suggestion hit you like a punch to the gut. Was this really that easy for him? He just ripped your heart out and splashed it on the ground. Your chest hurt so much and he was just sitting there? Was he not at all affected by the way you looked close to crying now?

"Fine. Enjoy being single and available," you retorted, your voice trembling with suppressed emotion.

Your boyfriend rolled his eyes looking over at you, indicating how he didn’t really think that you guys were breaking up. Though in your head, this was the last time you were ever going to look into his eyes again.

"You're too sensitive, always getting upset over nothing."

You were already on the edge, not having even processed that you guys almost- probably did break up over you trying to talk something out with him.

“Us breaking up is nothing to you?”

The weight of his words crashed over you, the tears finally spilling down your cheeks. Max's expression softened, regret flashing in his eyes, but it was too late. The damage had been done, and the fragile bond between you felt irreparably shattered.

Lewis Hamilton

How can one tell if they really are in a good relationship? Is it the security and sense of peace? Is it the frequent love confessions? Honestly, the explanation might differ person to person but one thing you always believed that made a relationship was being level headed even during arguments when emotions were running high

Needless to say, you were very glad you found solace in Lewis. A person who was prone to recognizing the impact of his words. Arguments between you two were rare, and when they did occur, Lewis prioritized finding solutions rather than escalating the conflict. His ability to remain level-headed during disagreements was a cornerstone of your relationship.

Everyone has those days though, when acting out of character seems more suitable than the usual. Moments when emotions override reason.

You were more worked up than usual. Your insides were burning with this desire to get answers because your boyfriend wasn’t there with you on the day you needed him the most.

You drove back home from your conference, dismayed despite it being a very successful session, given that your proposal got accepted as soon as you were done. You just wished your chocolate eyed man was sitting in the crowd looking at you with his signature proud smile.

After a shower, you sat on your couch to watch some show and just move on from the bittersweet day. It was an hour later, when your boyfriend showed up with a bouquet in his hand. Lewis walked over to you and leaned down to kiss your head.

“Congratulations, love," he greeted, oblivious to the storm brewing within you. “Saw it on the news, sorry I couldn’t join you. Got caught up with work.”

Usually, you would have avoided the argument till you felt like you could understand his side too. That was one of the things that helped you guys the most. You both waited to discuss stuff till you knew you were calm and ready to get what the other was saying.

“Aren’t you too busy with work lately?”

He gave a humorous huff in return, not catching on.

“You know how it is once the season starts.”

“You literally got home last night and you had to go in again early in the morning?”

“Missed me?”

He had a playful grin on his face and it killed you to spoil the good mood.

"Of course, after all you're more committed to your cars than you are to me."

The words left your mouth and you were too far gone to be caring about it at this point. Lewis has been such a passionate lover so this sudden shift was hurting you.

“What was that?” he responded, his tone sharp with surprise.

However, you were done and already up to call in early but his words stopped you on our track.

“Wow. You're so insecure, it's exhausting trying to boost your ego all the time."

Tears immediately welled up in your eyes but you didn’t turn around and with a deflated sigh, walked into your bedroom before locking the door while Lewis stood frozen in his place, not believing his own words.

It was like he was in a stance and all he could do was listen to you cry through the closed door on a day when you guys were supposed to be celebrating each other’s wins.

Carlos Sainz

Carlos was the perfect man. His mature yet easy going demeanor was exactly what you needed in a partner. You hadn't been together for that long to be at the altar but just enough to know that you were going to last.

You understood the demands on Carlos's time, with his career in the spotlight of the racing world when you decided to say yes to a date with him. Carlos was left with very less time away from all the glam, media and the track. Making it precious because of how rare it was.

You mostly accompanied him and let him drag you around to wherever he wanted once he had the break. So imagine your surprise when the only time you made some pretty important plans and he refused to tag alone.

"I can’t believe you’re saying no to this," you protested, frustration bubbling beneath the surface.

“I’m not saying no to anything, Carina.” He kissed your knuckles to un-knot the strong fist you’ve made of them. “I’m just suggesting we do it some other time.”

"But this is the third time, Carlos!" You stood up, unable to contain your hurt and disappointment. “Sorry if meeting my parents is such a chore for you.”

“You’re putting words in my mouth now.” Carlos responded with a sigh, attempting to pull you into a hug, which you reluctantly accepted. “It's not about it being a chore. You know I'd do anything for you, Y/N."

"I do know that, but actions speak louder than words, Carlos. My family is important to me."

“I promise that I want to meet them. I do. It's just… the timing."

"I don't want promises, Carlos. I want actions. If you can't even make it to meet my parents, what does that say about our future?" You insisted with a heavy heart, putting distance between you two.

"You're blowing this out of proportion, Y/N." Carlos countered, frustration evident in his voice.

"Out of proportion? I just wanted you to meet my family, and you can't even do that!"

“Well, I don’t have time to waste on this! If you want to go, just go alone!” His words hung in the air, a sharp pang of hurt piercing through you.

You immediately took a step back and saw him do the same. Both of you standing there as the silence stretched, contemplating in silence what exactly the next course of action was going to be.

“Y/N, I…” He trailed off as you glared at your foot, trying to hold the tears in before one eventually slipped and fell down your cheek.

“Baby, no! Don’t cry!” He panicked about extending his hand, about to touch you but you flinched away and shook your head.

“Carlos, if you think I’ll just ignore what you said ten seconds ago then you’re very wrong.” You whispered, your voice thick and husky.

Guess you were the only one from you both expecting this relationship to last. A second later, you were clutching your bag in your hand and walking towards the exit, speaking up before Carlos could beg you once again to ‘sit and talk it out.’

“Don’t,” you interrupted, your voice barely a whisper. “Thanks for letting me know that our time together was time wasted for you.”

You walked out with his heart in your pocket, your own splashed on the floor of your apartment.

Charles Leclerc

Charles was the love of your life, the very time you saw him smile at you from across the room igniting a spark in you that shaped your future together.

He walked over to you with a pretty girl hanging onto his arm, leaving the impression that they were more than friends. Everyone around you was also convinced at the time that they were dating but Charles bluntly flirting with proved just how different the real life scenario was.

Pippa was just his ‘best friend,’ someone who throws side eyes at you every time you and your boyfriend are in close proximity to her. Despite nearly a year together, her hostility persisted, the woman was a different kind of vicious. Hell bent on draining your energy.

It was physically exhausting being around her with her catty sarcastic tone that Charles always failed to notice. It was just another one of those days and Charles dismissed your concerns as usual, leaving you frustrated.

This time it was pissing you off greatly.

"Doesn't she realize we're together?" You rolled your eyes.

Charles remained silent and that drew your brows together.

“Charles, does she not think we’re serious?”

“I don't think so. She's always been oblivious to these things.”

And honestly? That fucking hurt. It hurt to know that Charles noticed this but was still rather quick to defend her every time.

"But we've been together almost a year?”

"Baby, she just never pays attention.” His arm pulled you closer to his chest. “Or maybe she doesn't want to see it."

"Do you think she has feelings for you?”

There it was, the truth out in the open. As much as it made you want to die to say it out loud and acknowledge it, your body felt lighter while the comforting arm around your waist began to feel heavier.

"I don't know. Maybe?” Charles’ chest heaved with a deep sigh, "It's complicated?"

The heart beating in your chest stopped for a long second because of how unconcerned your boyfriend seemed right now. Was he seriously just going to accept that a person he has shared so much history with wants to steal him from you?

“It’s not that simple, darling. she's been a friend for years.”

“Yeah, well, friends don't act like that. She’s just what? Waiting for the right moment to swoop in and steal you away from me?”

Charles did not like it because the arm was moved away from you in a second and he was sitting a bit straighter now. He looked furious and ready to defend his best friend and all that was running through your head was how he would probably not do the same for you in front of her.

"That's enough, Y/N. You're being paranoid."

"Paranoid? Or realistic? Face it, Charles, you're so blind when it comes to her. It makes me feel so small compared to her!"

Charles, frustrated and defensive, ran a hand through his hair and shot back,"Don't flatter yourself thinking Pippa gives a damn about you or me."

Lando Norris

No one could deny the magnetic pull Lando had on everyone around him. It was, after all, what drew you to him in the first place. You had your biases but he broke through them all with his shameless at worst and awkward at best flirting.

However, as you stood in a quiet corner to hide from the crowd, you couldn’t find it in yourself to sympathize with Lando. He had brought you to this glamorous social event, flashes of camera and expensive drinks overflowing all around you.

You were extremely excited to accompany your boyfriend especially since he had such an amazing season but throughout the evening, Lando was constantly pulled away by enthusiastic fans and demanding media, leaving you aside feeling like an accessory rather than his partner.

Standing in a quiet corner, you couldn't help but feel a pang of envy as you watched other couples bask in each other's company. You didn’t even know where Lando was at this very second.

Then, suddenly, his arms enveloped you from behind, his lips pressing gently against your head. "I'm sorry, babe. Everyone here just wants a piece of me," he murmured, attempting to console you.

You sighed and tried to calm yourself so you wouldn't explode in front of everyone, "I understand, but I miss spending time with you."

"I promise, I'll make it up to you tonight." Lando winked, keeping the conversation light.

That was all he said before someone from your left approached him again and your safety haven spot under the stairs was crowded with journalists a second later. You rolled your eyes before walking away, with half a mind to grab a cab and leave.

It was on your way back home when your patience finally ran its course as you listened to your boyfriend go on and on about how much of a success the event was.

“Why did you even take me with you?” You interrupted, your tone tinged with hurt and watched as the smile on his face got replaced with a frown.

“What?”

“I mean… you barely clicked two pictures with me and then left me to fetch for myself? You didn’t even come stand with me for more than a minute?”

"Babe, I'm sorry, but this is part of the job."

"I get it, but it doesn't make it easier.” You felt your own body shudder because of how overwhelmed you felt. “You were there talking to everyone but me!”

Lando opened his mouth to say something but you weren’t done yet.

“They were all strangers to me and you didn’t even acknowledge this! I was standing there alone the whole time, watching others and wondering why my boyfriend wasn’t there for me!”

The weight of your words hung heavily in the air, and for a moment, there was silence. You stopped to take a breath and not start crying. Then, Lando spoke, his words struck like a knife to the heart.

“This isn’t… This isn’t about you. Why are you always making it about you?”

Your body froze after that and your mind went blank. You didn’t care that the tears were running out of your eyes or that apologies were falling from his mouth. His own eyes were welling up because he knew.

He knew what he said was unacceptable.

You were so zoned out that as soon as the car stopped, you got out of the car. Thankful to catch the glimpse of yellow among the traffic before you hailed a taxi, the distance between you and Lando growing with each passing moment.

He attempted to hold your arm, his own tears falling down his face. You just wanted to put your point across but with his reaction, you were certain you guys were done for.

“I guess I expected a little too much from you, Lando.”

With a heavy heart, you walked away, knowing that sometimes love wasn't enough to mend the fractures in a relationship.

( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

absolutely loved ‘baby, would i still be your lover’, everyone single one got me in my feels! i was wondering would you consider doing a part 2? whether it ends in angst or fluff

I'll tell you the truth, but never goodbye

★ : summary :: when he accidentally insults you during an argument- aftermath ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: hurt/comfort, hints of angst ★ : word count :: 4.3k ★ : a/n :: thank you so much for the love on part 1 💓 some of these have open ending so you can pick whether you'd like to forgive them or not as a reader!! feedback is appreciated :)

( part 1 )

Max Verstappen

You sighed as you sat down to have your morning tea as usual, trying to pretend that nothing was wrong. As if you hadn't spent all night long getting your phone spammed with calls that you were ignoring.

After mindlessly roaming around for a bit, you eventually decided to crash at your best friend’s place. You lazily waved at her as she frantically got ready to leave for work. However, you were on your tiptoe as soon as the door opened.

A body that was possibly sleeping while leaning against the door fell inside and you heard curses that you were quite too familiar with. Your heart clenched at the sight of your boyfriend - or perhaps now, your ex-boyfriend - on his knees, nursing the wound on his head. The ache of seeing him in pain reignited the anguish you thought you had left behind.

“Okay,” you heard your friend murmur. “I'm gonna let you guys get to it.” She was out the door a second later.

You looked at the closed door instead of the man who was desperately trying to make eye contact with you.

“How long have you…” You trailed off before deciding that you didn't want to know.

“As soon as you turned your phone off, Y/N! I've been here since last night.” "Why?" you choked out, the words barely escaping your lips as tears threatened to overflow. His brows furrowed before he ran his hands over his face and got up to sit right next to you. You saw his hand itching toward yours and instinctively pulled it towards your body. "Because I needed to see you in person, to talk." He took another deep breath and you later realized that he was trying to stop himself from crying. “I realize I messed up, baby. I.. I never should have let you walk out.” But his attempt to mend the shattered pieces of your relationship only served to reopen the wounds, your walls instinctively rising in defense,"Talk? You think a talk is going to fix everything?" Max's eyes were filled with a mix of regret and desperation as he reached out for your hand, his fingers trembling slightly. "No, I don't think a talk will magically fix everything," he admitted, his voice raw with emotion.

"But it's a start. I need you to know that I'm truly sorry for what happened. I hate myself for hurting you, for making you doubt how much you mean to me."

You couldn't bring yourself to meet his gaze, the pain of the previous night still too fresh in your mind.

“How can I trust you again, Max? How can I be sure that this won't happen again?" Your voice was barely a whisper, filled with the ache of betrayal.

Max's grip on your hand tightened, his eyes pleading for understanding. "I know I've messed up, Y/N. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to earn back your trust. I'll work on my temper, I’ll be better to you, I'll do anything you ask of me. I just need you to give me another chance." “You know you’ve always been the best to me, right? I just can’t believe that instead of talking it out yesterday, you straight up skipped to breaking up wit-” Fresh tears started falling down your cheeks. Max immediately leaned forward to hold you in his arms and you let him because you needed him. But how could you trust him again? How could you be sure that history wouldn't repeat itself? That he won’t throw away your whole relationship just because the anger got a hold of him? As Max held you close, you felt a wave of conflicting emotions wash over you. Part of you wanted to push him away, to scream and shout at him for causing you so much pain. But another part of you craved his warmth, his touch, his presence.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," Max whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "I know I messed up, and I hate myself for it. I never meant to hurt you, I swear."

You buried your face in his chest, the tears soaking through his shirt as you struggled to make sense of your feelings.

“I just don't know if I can do this anymore, Max," you admitted, your voice muffled against him. Max tightened his embrace, his arms wrapping around you protectively. "I understand," he murmured, his voice gentle. His admission eased your thumping heart a bit, you were glad to have him back. The storm within you finding a momentary calm.

"I made you feel like our relationship was disposable, like breaking up was no big deal. But that couldn't be further from the truth. You're the most important person in my life, baby and the thought of losing you terrifies me. I'll do whatever it takes to make things right between us, to show you just how much you mean to me. I'll do whatever it takes to earn back your trust if you still want me."

Lewis Hamilton

The weight of Lewis's words hung heavy in the air, suffocating you as you retreated into the sanctuary of your bedroom. Tears streamed down your cheeks unchecked, your heart aching with a pain you couldn't quite comprehend. How had a day that started with such a promise turned into this? You buried your face in your hands, the sting of Lewis's words feeling like acid running through your veins.

Outside the door, the silence was deafening, broken only by the muffled sound of your sobs. Lewis stood frozen in place, his mind racing as he replayed the exchange in his head.

He couldn't believe the words that had escaped his lips, couldn't fathom how he had allowed his frustration to morph into such hurtful remarks.

Minutes stretched into eternity as Lewis grappled with the weight of his actions, the gravity of his words settling like a lead weight in his chest.

He wanted to reach out to you, to apologize and make things right, but his feet remained rooted to the spot, paralyzed by the magnitude of his mistake.

Inside the bedroom, you were consumed by a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. Anger, hurt, betrayal - they all swirled together into an ugly monster, threatening to engulf you whole.

How could the man you loved, the man who had always been your rock, turn on you with such venom?

But beneath the anger and hurt, there was a flicker of doubt, a gnawing fear that maybe Lewis's words held a grain of truth. Maybe you were too insecure, too needy, too demanding. Maybe you were asking for too much, expecting him to be there for you when he had his own priorities and responsibilities. Maybe-

The sound of a soft knock on the door snapped you out of your thoughts, and you looked up to see Lewis standing there, his expression wrought with regret and guilt. For a moment, neither of you spoke, the weight of the unspoken apology hanging heavy in the air. Looking at him distraught made your chest feel worse. How could he make you feel ten fold worse than this and not feel a thing? 

"I'm sorry," Lewis finally whispered, his voice barely audible. "I didn't mean what I said. I was out of line, and I know I hurt you. Please, let me make it right." He rushed through the words.

His words pierced through the haze of your pain, and you felt a bit of heaviness leaving your body. He crossed the room in a few strides, dropping to his knees in front of you, his eyes pleading for forgiveness. 

"I don't know what came over me," he admitted, his voice thick with emotion before your boyfriend took your hand away from your face and kissed your cheeks. "I was so caught up in my own frustrations that I lashed out at you, and I hate myself for it. You don't deserve to be treated that way, especially not by me."

You studied his face, searching for any sign of insincerity, but all you saw was genuine remorse and regret. And despite the pain still raw in your chest, you couldn't deny the love you felt for him, the longing to mend what had been broken between you. “You hurt me,” you whispered but didn’t push him away as he laid down with you, holding you close to his chest. Some of your resolve wavering when you felt his fast heartbeat. “I wanted you there so much.” He nodded as he shushed you, his own eyes dropping tears. “I’m so so sorry, baby. I can't even begin to express how deeply I regret the way I acted the whole day, I know you deserve so much more but-” You shifted slightly, knowing all that you wanted right now was comfort, you didn't want to forgive him or minimize the weight of his actions. "I don't know if I can right now," you replied, your voice trembling with the weight of your emotions.

Lewis's eyes brimmed with tears as he whispered, "Please don't shut me out. I can't bear the thought of losing you."

You felt a pang of guilt at the pain evident in his voice. "I just need some time to process everything," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

"I understand," Lewis replied, his tone filled with sorrow. "But please know that I'm here whenever you're ready to talk."

You nodded, silently acknowledging his words as you allowed yourself to be enveloped in his comforting embrace. 

"I promise to make it up to you," Lewis vowed earnestly, his voice laced with determination. "I'll do whatever it takes to earn back your trust."

"I want to believe you," you admitted quietly, your heart heavy with uncertainty. Everything was a little too raw right now and your emotions were all over the place.

"I'll spend every moment proving it to you," Lewis declared, his eyes locking with yours in a silent vow.

“I was thoughtless and cruel today, and I never should have let those words leave my lips. You are not insecure, you are strong and resilient, baby. You deserve so much better than the hurtful words I spoke. Please know that I can’t lose you, Y/N. I will work tirelessly to regain your trust and rebuild what I have so carelessly shattered. You mean the world to me, and I will spend every moment striving to be worthy of your love.”

Carlos Sainz

As you sat nervously in your childhood home, the familiar sights and sounds providing little comfort, your mind raced with thoughts of disappointment and hurt.

For the third time, Carlos had failed to join you in meeting your parents, leaving you to face their questioning looks and unspoken concerns alone. You had rehearsed what you would say to them, how you would explain his absence, but each time, the words caught in your throat, choked by a mixture of frustration and sadness. For the past few days since you walked out of your apartment, you had been ignoring Carlos’ attempts to reconcile with you. The calls and texts he spammed you with were ignored and curses left your mouth as soon as your mind went back to the day of the argument, bringing unwanted tears to your eyes.

In the passing, you saw a Ferrari conference being conducted and as much as you wanted to reach out and talk it out with him, your heart did flips that you were sure you should have visited a doctor for.

Your parents, ever perceptive, noticed your unease as you fidgeted with the napkin in your lap, casting worried glances in your direction. You tried to muster a reassuring smile, but it faltered, betraying the turmoil within you.

How could you explain to them that the man you loved couldn't find the time to meet them, despite his promises and assurances? "What's wrong, sweetie?" your mom asked, concern evident in her voice.

You sighed, hesitating for a moment before replying, "It's Carlos... He like…"

Your dad's brow furrowed. "Is everything okay?"

You tried to muster a reassuring smile. "Yeah, he said that he got caught up with work. You know how busy he is with his racing and all..." Your dad’s brows furrowed when you trailed off, about to ask you what exactly you meant but just as you were steeling yourself to broach the subject, the doorbell rang, startling you from your thoughts.

Your heart sank as you realized it was likely a neighbor stopping by to meet you since you don’t visit that often, you stood up to go greet them. But then, to your disbelief, you heard his voice drifting through the door, before you saw your boyfriend standing right behind it. Your head titled in confusion and you drew a breath that took most of the stress from the previous days away from your body.

"Sorry I'm late," he said, his tone apologetic yet determined. Carlos took your hand and kissed it lightly,"Traffic was a nightmare." “What about the conference that you-” “You’re the most important person in my life, Y/N.” He cut you off before pulling you in and walking to the dining room that was in his vision. As if that was the answer to your question.

You turned to face him, your eyes wide with surprise and a flicker of hope. There he was, looking slightly disheveled but undeniably earnest, his gaze that locked on yours was as if it was seeking forgiveness. You could see the sincerity in his eyes, the regret etched in the lines of his face.

Your parents exchanged a glance, their expressions softening as they took in the sight of Carlos standing before them. 

Despite their reservations about his repeated absences, they couldn't deny the genuine affection that Carlos held in his eyes when he looked at you.

Before you could find the words to respond, Carlos took a step forward, his hand reaching out tentatively. "I'm really sorry, both of you," he said, addressing your parents directly.

"I know how important this is to you, and I should have made more of an effort to be here on time."

His words hung in the air, a silent acknowledgment of his shortcomings and a pledge to do better. You felt a surge of emotion welling up inside you, a mixture of relief, gratitude, and a glimmer of renewed faith in your relationship. "Well, we're just glad you could make it," your dad said, offering Carlos a handshake.

"Thank you for coming, Carlos," your mother said, her voice warm yet cautious. "We understand that life gets busy, but it's important to make time for the people who matter most."

Carlos nodded, his expression earnest as he met her gaze. "I couldn't agree more. Family means putting in effort, I promise to make it up to all of you."

As you sat down to dinner, the atmosphere was tinged with a sense of reconciliation and hope. Your hand still intertwined with his as you saw him charm your family. Despite the rocky start, Carlos's presence brought a newfound sense of unity and understanding to the table. And as you shared stories and laughter, you couldn't help but feel grateful for the opportunity to mend what had seemed irreparably broken.

In that moment, you realized that love wasn't just about grand gestures or sweeping declarations—it was about the everyday moments of connection and compromise, the willingness to forgive and grow together.

And as you looked at Carlos, his eyes filled with determination and affection, you knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, you would face them together, hand in hand.

Charles Leclerc

Charles had apologized right after he had said those words and though you had both fallen back into routine, the underlying bitterness and resentment was still present. You weren’t the one initiating any kind of affection from your side and every time Charles was initiating anything, you half assed your way out of it. Was it childish? Probably. But you were still not comfortable with how easily you had forgiven Charles, burying your hurt just to avoid conflict once again despite knowing deep down that he has hurt you probably more than anyone else ever has. These thoughts were running through your head as you sat beside Charles, your heart still heavy with the weight, you couldn't shake the feeling of unease that lingered in the air. Especially because Charles seemed distant, his mind preoccupied with thoughts, that you couldn't help but wonder what exactly they were. Why had he even asked to go on a date today? To break up with you? Suddenly, Pippa appeared, her presence causing the knot to form in your stomach to get tighter. She approached with a confident stride, a charming smile gracing her lips as she greeted Charles with a hug.

"Hey, Charlie!" Pippa exclaimed, her eyes flickering briefly in your direction before returning to Charles. "Long time no see!"

Charles returned her hug, though his embrace seemed somewhat forced. "Hey, Pippa. Yeah, it's been a while." 

You observed their interaction closely, your unease growing with each passing moment. Pippa's presence always seemed to unsettle you, and you couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to their friendship than met the eye. Was he gonna break up with you in public and confess his years long feelings for Pippa? Charles glanced at you, his expression softening as he reached for your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. "I was just out with Y/N today."

You couldn't help but feel a rush of warmth at his actions, his affectionate gesture soothing some of the tension that had been building between you.

"Nice to meet you, Y/N," Pippa said, offering you a friendly smile. "Sorry I didn’t see you next to Charlie."

You returned her smile, though it didn't quite reach your eyes and managed to reply without gagging. "Nice to meet you, Pippa." Charles tightened his grip on your hand, silently reassuring you of his presence and support. "We were just grabbing a coffee," he explained, his gaze flickering between you and Pippa. "Care to join us?"

Pippa hesitated for a moment, her eyes narrowing slightly as she glanced at you before turning back to Charles. "Actually, I was hoping we could catch up alone, if that's okay."

You felt a pang of anxiety at her words, a sense of foreboding settling in the pit of your stomach. Despite your reservations, you nodded, forcing a smile as you released Charles's hand. It was better to walk away yourself than to have Charles dismiss you.

"Of course," you said, though your voice sounded strained even to your own ears. "I'll wait for you outside."

Charles shot you an alarmed look as you stood up,”I’ll see you in a few.” Charles’ hand lingered on yours for a moment longer before you reluctantly let go and made your way to the door.

You leaned against your car and enjoyed the wind for a second. You couldn’t help but catch a glimpse of the exchange between your boyfriend and his best friend sitting inside.

You were half scared to find them kissing or something but, instead a sense of confusion washed over you as you watched the way Pippa was angrily point a finger at Charles and scream at him.

It was a second later when she stormed out before making her way towards you.

"Is he doing this because of you?!" Pippa's accusatory tone sent a shiver down your spine, her words hitting too close to home.

Before you could even process what was happening, Charles emerged from the cafe, his expression determined as he approached you and Pippa.

"Go home, Pippa," he said firmly, his voice leaving no room for argument as he intertwined his hand with yours.

Pippa's eyes blazed with anger, her fists clenched at her sides as she glared at Charles. "You will regret this, Charles!" she spat before storming off, leaving you both standing there in stunned silence.

Once Pippa was out of sight, you turned to Charles, your heart pounding in your chest. "What was that all about?" you asked, your voice trembling slightly.

Charles sighed, running a hand through his hair as he looked at you with apologetic eyes. "I'm sorry you had to witness that, Y/N. Pippa has been... difficult lately."

You frowned, your mind reeling with confusion and frustration. "Difficult how?"

Charles hesitated for a moment, his gaze searching yours as if trying to find the right words. "She's been pushing boundaries, trying to come between us. But I won't let her." 

"Hey," he continued, taking your hand in his. "I told Pippa that I wouldn't be spending time with her alone anymore. If she can't accept you, then it's better for us to not be friends at all."

You blinked in surprise, a rush of gratitude flooding through you at his words. "Really?"

Charles nodded, squeezing your hand gently. "Really. You're the most important person in my life, and I won't let anyone come between us."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him, holding him close. "Thank you, Charles. I appreciate you standing up for us."

He smiled softly, squeezing your hand reassuringly. "I'll always stand up for us, Y/N. You mean everything to me."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you threw your arms around him, holding him close. Despite the lingering bitterness and resentment, you couldn't deny the overwhelming love you felt for him in that moment.

Lando Norris

As you stepped out of the taxi, the cool night air enveloped you, offering a moment of respite from the whirlwind of emotions that had engulfed you throughout the evening.

Your heart still felt heavy with the weight of Lando's hurtful words, but beneath the pain, a numbness resided- knowing deep down that you might’ve just broken up with your boyfriend.

Before you could take another step, you heard the sound of hurried footsteps approaching from behind. Turning around, you saw Lando rushing towards you, his eyes filled with remorse and his expression wrought with sorrow. Your hand instinctively went to your chest, trying to calm the rapid beating of your heart.

"Y/N, please wait," he called out, his voice pleading as he reached your side, breathless from his haste.

You pulled your face to meet his eyes, uncertainty and wariness etched into your features as you met his gaze. Part of you yearned to turn away, to shield yourself from the pain of his words, but another part couldn't help but hope that maybe, just maybe, he was sincere in his apology.

"Lando," you said softly, your voice tinged with a mixture of hurt and apprehension. You wanted to say more but the damn ball in your throat stopped you doing so.

He took a deep breath, his eyes never leaving yours as he searched for the right words to express the depth of his regret. "I know I messed up, Y/N. I hurt you, and I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am for that."

His words washed over you like a soothing balm, offering a sliver of comfort. But still, you couldn't bring yourself to let go of the hurt that lingered in your heart.

"I should have been there for you tonight, supporting you and showing you how much you mean to me," Lando continued, his voice filled with genuine remorse. "Instead, I let my own selfishness and insecurities get in the way, and for that, I am truly sorry."

Tears welled up in your eyes as you listened to him, the sincerity in his voice echoing the ache in your own heart. You were sure you’ll regret letting go of this amazing relationship without at least attempting to work on it.

Despite the pain he had caused you, you couldn't help but feel a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, there was still a chance to rebuild what had been broken.

"I don't expect you to forgive me right away, Y/N," Lando said softly, his hands shaking and showcasing the intensity of his vulnerability.

"I know I have a lot of work to do to earn back your trust and your love. But please, just give me a chance to make things right. I promise to do whatever it takes to show you how much you mean to me, every single day for the rest of my life."

His words hung in the air, heavy with sincerity and remorse, leaving you torn between the desire to hold onto the pain of the past and the hope for a brighter future. As you gazed into his eyes, searching for any hint of insincerity or deceit, all you found was raw honesty and unwavering devotion.

With a heavy heart and a flicker of hope, you reached out to take his hand, intertwining your fingers with his. "I don't know if I'm ready to forgive you just yet, Lando," you whispered, your voice trembling with uncertainty.

Lando takes a step closer, gently cupping your face in his hands. "I'll spend every moment proving I'm worthy of your love, Y/N. Let me show you how much you mean to me, starting from this moment. I'll do whatever it takes to earn back your trust, even if it means giving you the space you need. Just know that I'm here for you, whenever you're ready."

( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

my boy only breaks his favorite toys

★ : summary :: when he cheats on you ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: angst ★ : word count :: 5k ★ : a/n :: please remember that all of this is fiction! anyway, enjoy the angst <3 cheating is not a slip up but a statement and i will not be writing a part 2 where they get back together :) as usual requests are open for other endings if you're interested (maybe she ends up with someone else on the grid to make it hurt more lol) ★ : gifs :: @\f1-stuff @\userhamilton @\slowestlap @\tyrannosaurus-maxy

Max Verstappen

Max and you had a pretty healthy work schedule. Thanks to your flexible remote work, you could travel with him and support him in person. But there were times when you were needed back at the home office but despite the distance, Max made sure to keep you in the loop.

From video calls, to texting whenever one was free, to random pictures shared, you were always pretty aware of what the other was doing. So imagine your shock when minutes after hanging up on a call after congratulating him on his win, you failed to get a hold of him before pictures of him started going viral.

But now, all of that seemed like a distant memory as you stared at the damning evidence on your phone. Pictures of Max, smiling and carefree, dancing with another woman in a crowded club, her arms wrapped around him possessively.

Your heart sank as you scrolled through the images, each one a painful reminder of the betrayal you never saw coming. And then, there it was, the blurry photo that confirmed your worst fears - Max and the other woman locked in a passionate kiss.

The world around you seemed to blur as well as tears welled up in your eyes, hot and bitter against your cheeks. Without thinking, you began to dial Max's number, your fingers trembling with a mixture of anger and desperation.

But each call went unanswered, each voicemail left unheard. With each unanswered ring, your heart broke a little more, until you could no longer bear the weight of your pain.

It was an hour later when you were in your bed, crying your eyes out when your phone finally lit up with Max's name, the screen casting a harsh glow in the dimness of your room.

As much as your head told you to hang up and let that be the final answer, you picked it up and whispered a low. ”Hi?” Your voice barely a whisper, choked with emotion.

”Y/N,” Max’s breathy voice came. It was enough to throw you off again and new tears gathered in your eyes.

”Where were you?” The words escaped your lips before you could stop them, raw with hurt and anguish.

”Baby…” Max's voice wavered, and you could hear the weight of his guilt in every syllable. It spoke volumes, you knew what had happened and he knew that. ”I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

Your chest tightened at his words, the pain of his deceit threatening to consume you whole. And then, without warning, a strangled sob escaped your lips, the sound echoing in the silence of the room.

You could hear Max's sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line, a sound that only served to intensify your grief. But you were beyond caring about appearances now, your heart laid bare for him to see.

”I trusted you,” you choked out between sobs, the words a bitter indictment of the love you had once shared. ”Why would you do this to me?”

How could the man that made you feel like the only girl in the world for him do this to you? Did he even love you or was he just a really good actor?

Your voice quivered with pain as you struggled to maintain your composure,”You've broken me in ways I didn't even know were possible.”

Max's voice wavered as he tried to find the right words to express his remorse,”I never meant to hurt you, it was the biggest mistake of my life.” 

The life he has made sure he spent with someone not you. His voice cracked further and you realized that he was also crying on the other end. ”I can't bear the thought of not having you in my life.”

There was a long pause, as if Max was searching for the right words to say. But what words could possibly undo the damage that had already been done, the trust that had been shattered beyond repair?

Your words cut through him, echoing the pain he had caused,”Did… did you even love me, Max?”

”Of course, I love you!” He spoke, his voice carrying a sense of hurt. As if questioning the audacity to even ask that and that angered you. It made you so mad because this was on him. He did this.

”I wish I could turn back time and make things right, I’m so sorry, Y/N.” Max's breath hitched as he spoke before you could. The wounds he had inflicted too deep to be healed with a simple apology. ”I never meant to make you doubt my love for you.”

And as you listened to his voice crack with emotion, you knew that there was only one thing left to do. ”I don't even recognize the person I fell in love with anymore.” You whispered with finality, your voice filled with a mixture of sadness and disbelief.

Was this really the man who had promised you a future filled with a family and laughter? The man who just made your heart bleed out?

Max caught on and rushed to get the words out,”Please, Y/N, don't hang up. I need you more than ever, I love y-”

You hung up because how dare he say that after what he did. He called you again and again after that and if you weren’t half dying in your apartment, maybe you could’ve scoffed at how the roles were switched.

However, all you could do was switch off your phone and wonder how the man who once kissed all your scars better, could leave deeper ones in their place. Leaving you to do the work to mend them all alone.

Lewis Hamilton

It had all started the day you had foolishly decided to set up lunch to have the two most important people in your life, your bestfriend and your boyfriend, meet.

Lewis seemed genuinely enthusiastic about finally meeting the person who had been such a solid support in your life. Little did you anticipate that this innocent gathering would unravel into a scene of deception.

The signs were subtle at first. A quick exchange of numbers, a glance shared behind your back– easy to dismiss as innocent. But why would you look for such signs? When it included your most trusted humans on the planet?

But then came the slips, the accidental mentions of knowing each other's whereabouts better than you did.

”I don't think she'll pick up, she said she had an afternoon meeti-” Lewis caught himself on time before shrugging and ending with a: ”She posted it on her instagram, did you miss it?”

You laughed it off though it irked you. You were just glad that they were close before...

After an especially tiring day, you finally entered your house. Surprised to see the sitting room empty, where Lewis waits for you every time he's home early.

You sighed, instinctively petting Roscoe before moving inside the house. Desperate for a shower and clean clothes to get the day's stench off of you.

So imagine your shock when you walked into your bedroom,to discover Lewis and Rachel entwined in your bed, their bodies exposed and vulnerable. In your bed.

It took a second for you to process it while they both scrambled to get their clothes on. You just stared in disbelief while Rachel cried on the bed under covers and Lewis frantically wore his clothes while saying… something?

You felt like you were underwater for a second because you saw his mouth moving before his words started registering and tears started to pool in your eyes. The pain felt tangible, like a weight pressing down on your chest, as you confronted the unthinkable reality of their infidelity.

”Baby, let me explain. Ple- Please, this isn't what it looks like... I-”

You tore your eyes away from him before looking over at Rachel who was crying because she probably understood exactly what was happening.

You wanted to ask what exactly Lewis thought was going on but decided not to because your throat was closing up. The image of them together was burned into your brain. You just shook your head as tears fell from your eyes before turning around and walking out of the room.

As Lewis desperately jumbled to dress himself, his hands fumbling with buttons and zippers, he pleaded with you, his voice cracking with desperation.

”Y/N, please, you have to listen to me. This isn't what it looks like, I swear,” he implored, his eyes wide with panic as he reached out to touch your arm, but you flinched away as if his touch burned. Feeling disgusted and deceived.

”What do you mean it's not what it looks like?!” you finally managed to choke out, your voice trembling with damage and betrayal. ”I come home to find you two... in our bed, na- naked!”

Lewis's face contorted in anguish, his mind racing for the right words to say, but nothing seemed adequate in the face of your devastation.

”It's... it's a misunderstanding, Y/N, I promise,” he stammered, his voice strained with emotion. ”Rachel and I... we didn't plan for this to happen. It's just... things got out of hand, and we never meant to do you wrong.”

You shook your head in disbelief because you didn’t know what else to do truly, feeling as if the ground had been pulled out from beneath you. ”How could you do this to me, Lewis? I thought you… that you loved me,” your voice turned in a whisper.

All the times he had discussed the future rushed through your mind. He wanted to retire and repeatedly told you how he wanted to marry you. Your hands trembled as you suddenly remembered asking Rachel to be your bridesmaid.

Suddenly, the pressure on your chest got worse.

Lewis's eyes pleaded with you, his voice barely a whisper as he struggled to find the right words. ”I don't know, Y/N. I don't know what came over me. I love you, you have to believe me. Please don't leave, we can work through this together.”

But his words fell on deaf ears as you turned away from him, the pain in your heart too raw to bear. ”I trusted you, Lewis. I trusted both of you,” you whispered, your voice barely audible over the pounding of your heart.

As you moved towards the door, every step heavier than the last, Lewis's voice trembled with desperation, his hands reaching out to grasp yours, pleading for your attention.

”Y/N, please, don't leave,” he begged, his voice cracking with raw emotion. ”I messed up, I know I did, but I love you. Please, let me make it right.”

You paused, the weight of his words pressing down on you like a suffocating blanket. ”How can you say you love me after what you did?” you asked, your voice barely a whisper, thick with pain.

And with that, you turned away, leaving behind the shattered remains of the life you had once shared, the echoes of Lewis's pleas fading into the emptiness of the night. Swearing to never put your trust in anyone else ever again.

Carlos Sainz

You had sworn off of relationships for so long after your last one that it was honestly a miracle, as your friends and family put it, that you agreed to go out with Carlos. But he was the perfect gentleman to you. The person who gave you hope for a better future. Giving you hope that maybe all the ‘cheesy’ discourse was for you too.

He knew how you were hurt the last time and reassured you about how special you were to him and how you were always enough. Enough for him.

It slowly became a running joke once you guys hit the two year mark. You were finally at a stage where you had a loving partner that you could trust blindly.

So to say that you were blindsided would be an understatement…

Your fingers trembled as you scrolled through Carlos's phone, your heart racing with each new message that appeared on the screen.

You never thought you'd be the type to snoop, but the nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach had become too much to ignore. He was so distant lately and so secretive about his phone, it was slowly killing you.

There it was, undeniable proof staring back at you in blue and white. Messages from an unknown number, filled with suggestive language and promises of secrecy. Your breath got caught in your throat as you read through the damning evidence, your heart sinking with each word.

‘Hey babe, can't wait to see you tonight ;) xoxo’

The message hit you like a punch to the gut, your mind reeling with disbelief. How could Carlos do this to you? You thought you had something special, something worth fighting for. But now, all those hopes and dreams lay shattered at your feet.

You tried to push down the rising tide of emotion, to find some innocent explanation for what you were seeing. But deep down, you knew the truth – Carlos was cheating on you.

When he emerged from the bathroom, you were waiting for him, phone in hand and tears in your eyes. And as you looked into his eyes, you knew that nothing would ever be the same again.

”Carlos,” you whispered, the weight of your words heavy in the air as he stepped into the room, his tousled hair and relaxed demeanor a stark contrast to the turmoil raging inside you.

You weren’t really sure why you weren’t screaming and thrashing things around already. It was like you were frozen on the spot.

”What's wrong?” he asked, concern etched into his features as he took in your tear-streaked face and the phone clutched tightly in your hand. Though, when you looked at him, all you could see was how he was your everything. How you had given him your everything.

And you still weren’t enough.

You struggled to find the words, to articulate the emotions coursing through you. ”I found... I found something on your phone,” you finally managed, your voice trembling with emotion.

Carlos's expression faltered, his eyes flickering with uncertainty as he took a hesitant step closer. ”What do you mean?” he asked, his voice tinged with apprehension.

You took a shaky breath, steeling yourself for the confrontation to come. ”Messages,” you began, your voice barely audible as you held up the phone, displaying the incriminating evidence for him to see. ”From someone... someone you've been seeing behind my back.”

Carlos's eyes widened in shock as he stared at the screen, his hand instinctively reaching out to take the phone from you. ”Y/N, I swear, I can explain,” he stammered, his voice tinged with desperation. Why was he reaching for the phone and not your hand?

But the words fell on deaf ears as the full weight of his betrayal hit you like a ton of bricks. ”Explain?” you echoed, your voice trembling with disbelief. ”How can you even explain this, Carlos? How could you do this to me?”

He reached out to touch you, to offer comfort or reassurance, but you recoiled, the sting of his infidelity too raw and painful to bear. ”I trusted you,” you choked out, tears streaming down your face as you backed away from him. ”How could you-”

Can love like this be lost too? You’ve been on your knees begging the universe to grant you one love that wouldn’t be snatched from you. Thinking all your prayers had been heard only for him to do it too.

Carlos's expression crumbled as he watched you retreat, his own anguish mirroring yours. ”I never meant for this to happen,” he pleaded, his voice thick with emotion. ”Please, Y/N, give me a chance to make things right.”

As Carlos pleaded with you, his words heavy with desperation, you couldn't help but feel a pang of doubt. His promises of love and devotion clashed with the evidence on his phone, leaving you torn between the man you thought you knew and the painful truth staring back at you.

You met his gaze, seeing the desperation etched into his features as he struggled to make you believe him. ”Can you hear me?” he implored, desperation lacing his words. ”You are always enough for me. Please, you have to believe me. I love you more than anything, Y/N.”

His words pulled at your heartstrings, the sincerity in his voice almost convincing you to give him another chance. But deep down, you knew that trust once broken was not easily repaired.

You met his gaze, feeling the weight of his plea bearing down on you. ”I hear you,” you replied softly, nodding through your tears, your voice tinged with sadness. ”But it's not that simple, Carlos. I want to believe you, but...”

Carlos's grip on you tightened, his body pressing against yours as he sought solace in your embrace. ”Please, don't leave,” he whispered, his voice filled with desperation. ”I'll do anything to make this right, to prove to you that you're the only one for me.”

Tears welled in your eyes as you pulled away, the pain of betrayal still raw and agonizing. ”No,” you murmured, your voice barely audible above the sound of your breaking heart. ”You did to us. You made me believe… I'm leaving. This is goodbye.”

With that, you turned and walked away, leaving Carlos standing alone in the wreckage of your brutally murdered relationship.

Charles Leclerc

You had rushed back home because for the first time in what feels like forever, your boyfriend was back home. Charles was a man of many charms. Despite being with him for so long, he still had you blushing and getting butterflies every time he was around.

He was busy when you got home so you decided to wash up but as you paced back and forth in the living room, your heart racing with anxiety, you didn’t know what to do to figure out what exactly Charles was doing.

Charles had been on the phone for what felt like hours, his voice hushed but urgent as he spoke to someone on the other end of the line. Normally, you wouldn't think much of it, but something about his tone tonight had set off alarm bells in your mind.

You tried to focus on a book, anything to distract yourself from the gnawing feeling of unease in the pit of your stomach. But every word you read seemed to blur together, your mind consumed with worry.

Finally, you couldn't take it anymore. With trembling hands, you set the book aside and made your way to the kitchen, where Charles was still on the phone.

”...I can't risk it tonight,” you heard him say, his tone strained ”She's coming home soon, and I don't want to risk it.”

Your heart skipped a beat at his words. Who was he talking about? And why did he sound so nervous?

Curiosity getting the better of you, you crept closer, straining to hear the other end of the conversation.

”...I know, I know,” Charles continued, his voice growing even more frantic. ”But I can't keep doing this. It's not fair to her, and it's not fair to you.”

Your blood ran cold at his words. What did he mean, ‘not fair to her?’ And who the fuck was he talking to?

Before you could process it all, Charles abruptly ended the call and turned to find you standing in the doorway, your eyes wide with shock and hurt.

”Y/N,” he started, his voice wavering as he took in your expression. ”I... I didn't realize you were there.”

You struggled to find your voice, your mind racing with a thousand questions. ”Who were you talking to, Charles?” you managed to choke out, your voice barely above a whisper.

Charles' eyes flickered with guilt as he shifted uncomfortably under your gaze. ”It's... it's nothing, Y/N,” he stammered, but you could tell he was lying. ”Just a friend.”

But you weren't buying it. Not after what you had just heard. ”A friend?” you repeated, your voice rising with anger and hurt. ”Is that what you call my replacement?”

Charles' face paled at your accusation, his eyes widening in shock. ”Baby, it's not what you think,” he protested, but you could hear the desperation in his voice. He looked so scared, as if he knew he was gonna get caught up into lies.

”Then what is it, Charles?” you demanded, your voice trembling with emotion. ”Enlighten me.”

He hesitated, his gaze flickering away from yours as if unable to meet your eyes. ”It's... it's complicated,” he finally admitted, but his words offered little comfort.

”There's nothing complicated about cheating on someone you claim to love.” You were trying to compose yourself, not show him how deeply his words had cut you but your hands were trembling and your voice was cracking. Face pale and eyes glassy.

Charles winced at your words, his guilt written plainly across his face. ”You’re the only person I love,” he insisted, his voice barely above a whisper. ”It's just... things got out of hand.”

You felt like you had been punched in the gut. How could he stand there and try to justify his betrayal? How could he expect you to forgive him after this? Why the fuck was he the one looking distort?

”I trusted you, Charles,” you choked out, tears welling in your eyes. He shouldn’t be expecting you to treat him as a victim too when he was the one guilty. ”I thought we had something special.”

Charles' expression softened, his eyes brimming with remorse. ”We do, Y/N,” he said, his voice cracking with emotion. ”I love you, more than anything. Please, you have to believe me.”

But love now felt like a distant memory, tarnished by his infidelity. ”How can I believe anything you say after this?” You scoffed bitterly. Angry at yourself for crying in front of the man who has probably been sleeping with someone else for months now.

Charles reached out to you, his hand trembling as he brushed a tear from your cheek. ”I'll do anything to make it up to you, Y/N,” he pleaded, his voice filled with desperation. ”Just give me a chance to prove it.”

You whispered, your voice heavy with resignation,”There are no second chances for cheaters.”

Lando Norris

Because of multiple torments inflicted by past lovers, you were always resistant to fall head first in any relationship. Hesitant to give your heart knowing recovering was going to be the absolute worst.

Comes in, Lando. The man who broke through all your barriers, took down the walls you put around yourself and had you love struck in a matter of time.

For a moment, everything was amazing. He was the best person you could've asked for. He looked at you as if you put the stars up in the sky.

Who could've thought?

Who could've thought that the same fucking man would have you breaking down at a family event in front of everyone.

The room buzzed with conversation as you sat at the dinner table, trying to ignore the growing tension in the air.

Lando's hand found yours under the table, his thumb tracing soothing circles on your palm. ”Are you okay?” he whispered, concern etched in his voice.

You forced a smile, nodding faintly. ”Yeah, just a bit overwhelmed,” you murmured, hoping to brush off your unease. Why was everyone looking at you with such pity?

But Lando's gaze remained fixed on you, his eyes searching yours for any sign of distress. ”You know you can talk to me, right?” he said softly, squeezing your hand gently.

Before you could respond, a sudden hush fell over the room, drawing your attention to the commotion across the room. You followed Lando's gaze, your heart sinking as you saw him make eye contact with one of your cousins, their faces morphing as if they were having a whispered conversation.

”What's going on?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper as dread coiled in the pit of your stomach.

You have seen this scene before and you did not like where this was going. Feeling overwhelmed, you got up and excused yourself from the table. Slightly glad to have Lando do the same.

This was all a confusion. You repeated in your head before standing outside the venue, away from distressed eyes and hushed gossips.

Lando's grip on your hand tightened, his expression unreadable as he turned to face you. ”I... I need to talk to you,” he said, his voice strained with emotion.

Your heart plummeted as you watched him fidget, every step feeling like a weight bearing down on your chest. ”What is it?” you asked, your voice trembling with apprehension.

Lando hesitated, his eyes darting away from yours as if unable to meet your gaze. ”I... I don't know how to say this,” he began, his voice faltering.

Just then, your cousin appeared at his side, her expression a mix of guilt and defiance. ”Y/N, we need to talk,” she said, her voice tinged with remorse.

They exchanged another glance and something in your mind stopped working.

Your breath caught in your throat as the pieces of the puzzle fell into place, the truth hitting you like a sledgehammer to the chest. ”No...” you whispered, the word barely a breath as tears welled in your eyes.

Lando reached out to you as you took a step away from them, his voice a desperate plea. ”Please, let me explain,” he begged, his eyes brimming with regret.

But you pulled away, the sting of deceit too raw and painful to bear. ”Not you too,” you choked out, your voice breaking with emotion. ”How could you do this to me?”

There were no answers, no explanations that could erase the pain of their breach of trust. They both just watched as you started crying softly. Apparently everyone in your family knew too.

As tears welled in your eyes, Lando's pleading voice cut through the air. ”Y/N, please, just give me a chance to explain.” His hand reached out towards you, but you recoiled, his touch now feeling like a betrayal.

”Explain what?” you retorted, your voice laced with disbelief. ”That you cheated on me with my cousin?”

Lando's eyes widened in panic but instead your cousin's voice broke through the tension, filled with regret. ”Y/N, I'm so sorry. It was a mistake, it shouldn't have happened.”

Anger surged within you at her words. ”Sleeping with my fucking boyfriend was a mistake?” you shot back, incredulous at the audacity of her apology.

Lando stepped forward, his expression a mix of remorse and longing. ”I never meant to cause you any pain, Y/N. Please believe me,” he pleaded, his voice trembling with emotion.

Your trust had shattered along with your heart. 

His voice quivered as he spoke again, desperation lacing his words. ”I love you, Y/N. I made a stupid mistake, but it doesn't change how I feel about you.”

But love now felt like a distant memory, tarnished by their adultery.

”If this is love, I want no part of it,” you declared, your voice filled with anguish. Knowing deep down that you meant it.

Your cousin reached out to you, her eyes brimming with tears. ”Y/N, please, you have to understand...” But understanding felt beyond your reach, lost in a sea of pain and betrayal.

”Understand what?” you cried out, your voice breaking with emotion. ”That my own sister betrayed me with my… my boyfriend?”

Lando's plea echoed in the air, his voice thick with desperation. ”I'll do anything to make it up to you, Y/N. Just give me a chance.”

But the chance had already been squandered, lost in the wreckage of their infidelity.

”You had your chance, Lando, and you blew it.” You wish you could be angry and put them to their places but your chest was hurting so much that it was almost dizzy.

You felt sick and on the verge of passing out.

”I'll do anything to make things right, Y/N. Just tell me what to do.” But there was nothing they could do to undo the damage that had been done, no words or actions that could mend the broken pieces of your heart.

They have insulted you in front of your whole family.

”There's nothing you can do to fix this, Lando. You've ruined everything,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper as you turned away, the weight of their betrayal too heavy to bear.

As you walked away, their voices faded into the background, drowned out by the deafening roar of your own heartbreak. And as you stumbled out into the night, the stars above offering no solace, you vowed never to let anyone break you again.

( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

please i'm begging you (please don't feel pressured if your life is busy 💕) we need pt 2 to the angst i can't handle this 😭 my heart 💔 the writing is too good that i'm feeling things 😓

was i stupid to love you?

★ : summary :: when he downplays your feelings ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: angst; hurt/comfort ★ : word count :: 4.6k ★ : a/n :: open ending, don't forget to vote after so i can get a bit of feedback :3 kinda rushed so might contain lots of typos sorryyyy!!

( part 1 )

Charles Leclerc

The house party buzzed with music and laughter, a cacophony that drowned your thoughts as you stormed through the crowded rooms. Your heart raced with a mix of anger and hurt, knowing Charles was right on your tail, determined to catch you before you could reach Arthur.

Your boyfriend’s hand wrapped around yours just as his brother turned around to look at you guys. You stomped your feet as you shook your head to dismiss Arthur and follow your boyfriend who quietly kissed your head in gratitude before you could step away.

”What is going on with you?!” Your voice trembled with barely contained fury as you confronted Charles in a quieter corner.

Charles sighed, his brow furrowing in frustration. ”I don’t know, baby. I’m so sorry—”

”You told me off when you should know that I’m right!” Your voice rose involuntarily. ”She fucking leaned in thinking that you were gonna choose her.”

”Y/N, please listen to me,” Charles said earnestly, stepping closer to you. ”I messed up. I know. But I would, never in a hundred years, choose anyone let alone her over you.”

You looked into Charles' eyes, seeing the sincerity and pain reflected in them. Your anger began to melt, replaced by a swirl of conflicting emotions.

”You’re just saying what I want to hear and I don't like it,” you said, your voice softer now, searching for clarity.

”It’s the truth,” Charles declared, his voice tinged with regret. ”I know I’ve hurt you baby and I'm sorry for that but I can’t— I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I watched you leave with my brother. Let me drop you home, okay?”

Tears welled up in your eyes, frustration and hurt mixing with the love you still felt for him. Charles gently took your hands in his, his touch warm and comforting.

”Y/N, please,” Charles pleaded, his voice raw with emotion. ”I never want to make you feel like you need to run away from me. I want to talk this out, please give me a chance to make things right.”

You hesitated, feeling torn between wanting to forgive him and the pain of betrayal still fresh in your heart.

”Okay,” you finally whispered, feeling emotionally drained. ”Let's go.”

Charles nodded, relief washing over his face. He led you out of the noisy party, his grip on your hand tight and reassuring. The cool night air outside provided a stark contrast to the heated emotions inside.

As Charles drove you home, neither of you spoke. The silence was filled with unspoken words and the weight of what had just transpired. But Charles kept stealing glances at you, his eyes full of regret and love.

When you arrived at your shared apartment, Charles parked the car but made no move to get out. He turned to you, his expression soft and vulnerable.

”I'll leave if you want me to,” Charles said quietly, his voice tinged with sorrow. ”But please, Y/N, give us a chance to talk tomorrow. I'll do whatever it takes to make this right.”

You looked at him, seeing the sincerity in his eyes and the love that still lingered despite everything. Tears fell down your cheeks as you nodded slowly.

”I need time,” you admitted softly, your voice barely audible. ”Time to sort through this.”

Charles nodded understandingly, reaching out to gently wipe away your tears. ”Take all the time you need,” he said softly, his thumb caressing your cheek. ”I'll be here, whenever you're ready.”

”Where will you go?” You asked, not wanting to leave just yet.

”To your brother’s house,” he joked and smiled cheekily when you let out a small laugh.

”I love you,” Charles continued and seemed satisfied when you saw your tinted cheeks, giving into the temptation to kiss your hand. ”I’ll stay at Arthur's for the night.”

With that, you stepped out of the car, your heart heavy with conflicting emotions. You watched Charles drive away, feeling the distance between you both but knowing that perhaps, with time, you could find a way back to each other.

Lando Norris

You sat in the break room at work, your lunch untouched in front of you. The memories of last night’s events still stung, the image of her hand on Lando’s thigh and the lipstick on his collar replaying in your mind.

Just as you were about to take a sip of water, the door swung open, and there he was, your— ex? —boyfriend, looking desperate and determined. You knew there was a possibility he’d try to catch you at work given that you’d taken away all other means.

”Y/N, can I please?” he said, his voice pleading as he pointed towards the hallway.

You nodded reluctantly and led him to an empty hall, away from prying eyes. The silence was deafening as you stood there, waiting for him to speak.

You nodded reluctantly and led him to an empty conference room, away from prying eyes. The silence was deafening as you stood there, waiting for him to speak.

”Y/N, please,” he started, his voice trembling slightly. ”I’m so sorry about last night.”

You crossed your arms, leaning against the table. ”Bet you had a good time, huh?”

”No, I didn't,” Lando said in disbelief before he took a deep breath, trying to keep his composure. ”Nothing that happened there was intentional. We were all drinking, and she... she got too close. I should have pushed her away. I’m sorry.”

You scoffed, anger bubbling up again, finally fired up enough to speak your mind. ”Her hand was on your fucking thigh, Lando. And your collar— her lipstick was all over it. How do you explain that?”

He winced, clearly pained by the memory. ”I know it looks bad, but it wasn’t what it seemed. She leaned in close to talk to me, and I didn’t realize she had left a mark. It was a— just a stupid mistake, and I should have been more aware.”

”More aware?” you echoed, your voice rising. ”You should have cared about how it would make me feel! Instead, you shrugged it off like it was nothing.”

”I didn’t mean to shrug it off,” he said, stepping closer. ”I was wrong. I should have reassured you, should have shown you that you’re the only one that matters to me. Baby, please just let me—”

You looked away, the pain still fresh. ”It’s not just about the lipstick or her hand. It’s about how you made me feel like I was overreacting, like my feelings didn’t matter.”

”They do matter,” he said, his voice breaking. ”More than anything. I was an idiot. I should have pushed her away immediately. I should have come to you and told you everything before you saw it for yourself.”

”You know I only want you,” he added softly, his eyes pleading with you.

You shook your head, trying to hold back tears. ”That’s the thing, Lando. I don’t know that. I actually believe that y— you don’t at all.”

Lando’s eyes filled with tears as a broken whisper of your name left his mouth. ”I h.. have never, I never will. Ever.” He stressed. ”Want anyone— need anyone the way I want you.”

You kept quiet as you looked at him trying to catch himself. Lending him your hand that he squeezed in return.

”I can’t believe you would ever believe that but I understand and, I promise… I’ll be more mindful, more respectful. I’ll make sure everyone knows I’m taken, that I’m yours. Please, give me a chance to make it right.”

The weight of his words hung in the air, and you let out a slow breath, trying to not have a breakdown at your workplace. ”It’s going to take time, Lando. Trust isn’t rebuilt overnight.”

”I know,” he said, relief washing over his features. ”And I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I’ll prove to you that I’m worthy of your trust.”

”Okay,” you whispered, your voice barely audible. ”I’ll give it a thought, Lando. But if you hurt me again, we’re done.”

”I understand,” he said, his voice filled with determination. ”Thank you, Y/N. I won’t let you down.”

Max Verstappen

The streets were bustling with late-night revelers, their laughter and chatter a stark contrast to the storm brewing inside you. The restaurant's neon sign flickered as you stepped out into the cool night air, your phone clenched tightly in your hand.

Three hours. You had waited for three hours, hoping Max would show up for your anniversary dinner, only to find out from the story of your mutual friend that he was out with her again.

On your anniversary.

You made your way through the crowded streets, not caring where you ended up. You just needed to get away, to think, to process the hurt and betrayal. Your phone buzzed incessantly in your pocket, but you ignored it. Max's calls and messages could wait. Right now, you needed space.

After wandering aimlessly for a while, you found yourself at the edge of the city, near the river. The quiet contrast of the flowing water was a welcome change from the city's noise. You sat on a bench, pulling your jacket tighter around you as a light drizzle began to fall. The soft patter of rain on the water's surface was soothing, but it didn’t dull the ache in your heart.

Minutes turned into an hour, and the rain intensified. Your phone buzzed again, and this time you glanced at it. Last message from Max was a minute ago

Max: Y/N, please. Where are you? Let me explain. I’m looking for you.

You sighed, wiping away the raindrops mixed with your tears. Your fingers hovered over the screen before you finally typed a reply.

You: By the river. Near the old bridge.

You didn’t know why you told him, but some part of you wanted to hear him out. To understand why he kept doing this. Why would he even waste time with you if he was already in love with someone else?

God. Even the thought of that brought up a real pain in your chest. The rain fell harder, and you huddled under the small awning of a nearby building, trying to stay somewhat dry.

After what felt like an eternity, you saw a figure running towards you through the rain. It was Max, drenched and breathless. He slowed as he approached, his eyes filled with worry and regret. HIs clothes were all over the place, untucked and wrinkled and you only drew the worst conclusion.

”Y/N,” he gasped, stopping a few feet away. ”Thank God, you're okay.”

You stood up, arms crossed defensively. ”You’ve got five minutes, Max. Make it count.”

He nodded, taking a step closer. ”I’m so sorry, Y/N. I know I’ve let you down. I was with her tonight because she’s going through a really rough time. She had no one else to turn to.”

You narrowed your eyes, the skepticism clear. ”On our anniversary? How convenient.”

He flinched at your tone but didn’t back down. ”I know it’s no excuse. I should have told you. I thought I could help her quickly and still make it to dinner. I didn’t realize it would take so long.”

You shook your head, the anger bubbling up again. ”This isn’t the first time, Max. How many times have I had to wonder if she’s really just a friend? How many times have you put her before me?”

Max stepped closer, his eyes pleading. ”I’ve been blind, Y/N. I didn’t see how much I was hurting you. There’s nothing romantic between us. She’s just a friend, and she needed my help. But I see now that I’ve been unfair to you.”

Tears mixed with the rain on your cheeks. ”I don’t know if I can keep doing this, Max. The constant worry, the feeling like I’m not enough. It’s tearing me apart.”

He reached out, tentatively taking your hand. ”You are more than enough, Y/N. I’ve been an idiot, and I’m so sorry. I love you, and I don’t want to lose you.”

You looked into his eyes, searching for any sign of deception. All you saw was sincerity and regret. ”How can I trust you again, Max? What did she even need help with?”

He squeezed your hand gently. ” She saw her ex at the club and he was being an asshole. I just went over for five to put him in his place when one of her friends posted the story. I’m sorry for the delay, baby. I know I should've been more transparent about everything. Just please, give me a chance to make things right.”

”Is she okay?” You took a shaky breath, your heart aching with the desire to believe him and he exhaled when you pulled him under the shit excuse of shelter you had from the rain.

”She’s okay. I promise I won't ever embarrass you this way again, baby. You won’t ever have to sit and wonder if I'm bailing because I found someone else or not.” Max took another deep breath. ”I never will, baby, you are the only one I want. I will never find anyone.”

You closed your eyes, the tears spilling over as you hugged him. ”I wanna go home.”

”Okay let’s go home, baby.” Max gently cupped your face, his thumbs brushing away your tears. ”But I need you to know. You are my priority, Y/N. I’ll never let you feel otherwise again. I love you more than anything, and I’ll spend every day proving it to you.”

You leaned into his touch, feeling a flicker of hope amidst the pain as you hugged him.

He sighed again, closing his eyes to soak in this. ”Happy anniversary, baby. I love you”

You pulled back slightly, looking up at him with a tired smile.

Carlos Sainz

Carlos's pleas had grown quieter, the urgency in his voice replaced with a softness that seemed to seep through the crack under the door.

You could hear his breath hitching, a clear sign that he was on the verge of breaking down himself. But you couldn’t get yourself to stand up as you sat on the bed, knees drawn to your chest, tears still streaming down your face as you tried to block out the sound.

”Y/N, please,” he choked out, and you could hear the tears in his voice now. ”I'm so sorry. I... I don't know what else to say. I can't lose you.”

The sincerity and raw emotion in his voice cut through you in a vicious manner, and against your better judgment, you found yourself getting up. You hesitated for a moment, your hand hovering over the doorknob, before finally opening the door just a crack.

Carlos was standing there, his eyes red and swollen from crying. When he saw you, a look of profound relief washed over his face. ”Thank you,” he whispered.

You stepped back, letting him in. He walked in slowly, as if afraid to invade your space, and you closed the door behind him. The silence was heavy, each second stretching into an eternity.

”I'm so sorry,” Carlos said again, his voice trembling. ”I swear, I didn't know she was going to kiss me. If I had known, I would have never invited her. I would never do anything to hurt you intentionally.”

You took a deep breath, trying to steady your own shaking voice. ”But you did invite her, Carlos. And I told you to cut her off so many times. Why didn't you listen?”

He ran a hand through his hair, looking utterly defeated. ”I thought... I thought we were just friends. I didn't realize she felt that way about me. And when she kissed me, I was so shocked. I— I froze. I'm an idiot. I should have pushed her away immediately.”

”You should have,” you echoed, your voice breaking as you recalled that scene and it felt like someone was physically stabbing you. ”Do you have any idea how much it hurt to see that?”

Carlos stepped closer, his eyes pleading. ”I know, and I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I love you, Y/N. You're the only one I want to be with.”

You looked down, tears falling onto the floor. ”How do I know that, Carlos? How do I know you won't let this happen again?”

He gently took your hands in his, his touch warm and reassuring. ”Because I can’t ever go through this again. I don’t want to know what it feels like to almost lose you. I'll cut her off completely. I promise you, baby, just, anything— it will never happen again.”

You pulled your hands away, wrapping your arms around yourself protectively. ”It's not just about cutting her off, Carlos. I can never get that image out of my brain now. What if you just wake up tomorrow that you didn’t get rid of her because yo— you…?”

You trailed off but Carlos understood and immediately shook his head. ”No,” he said firmly. ”I will never wake up with anyone other than you in my heart. You’re the one I love, the one I am going to live my life with.”

He didn’t let you speak as he carried on,”I understand. Trust is earned, not given. And I'll do whatever it takes to earn it back. I'll prove to you that you can trust me.”

You sighed, feeling the weight of his words. ”I want to believe you. But it's going to take time. A lot of time.”

”I know,” he said softly. ”And I'm willing to wait. I'll wait as long as it takes for you to trust me again. Just please, don't shut me out. Let me be there for you.”

You looked into his eyes, seeing the genuine remorse and love in them. Despite everything, a part of you still loved him deeply. ”Okay,” you whispered. ”But you have to understand, it's going to be hard. I'm still hurt, and it's going to take a while for me to heal.”

Carlos nodded, a flicker of hope in his eyes. ”I'll be patient. I'll be here for you, no matter what. And I'll do everything I can to make it right.”

”Alright.” You nodded, feeling a glimmer of hope yourself. ”Just... don't make me regret it.”

”I won't,” Carlos stepped closer, tentatively reaching out to wipe a tear from your cheek. ”I love you, Y/N. More than anything.”

You gave him a small as you leaned into his touch, feeling a mix of emotions, ”I love you too, Carlos. That's why this hurts so much.”

He pulled you into a gentle hug, holding you as if you were the most precious thing in the world. ”We'll get through this. Together.”

Lewis Hamilton

You paced around your apartment, the anger and hurt from the argument still fresh. The silence after the exchange with Lewis was deafening. You couldn’t believe he said those things. Your phone buzzed on the couch, but you ignored it, needing space to process.

A knock on your door interrupted your thoughts. It was loud and persistent. You hesitated, hoping it wasn’t who you thought it was.

”Y/N, please open up. I need to talk to you,” Lewis’s voice came through the door, sounding desperate.

You took a deep breath and opened the door. Your boyfriend stood there, looking remorseful.

”What do you want, Lewis?” you asked, your voice cold.

”Can I come in? Please, we need to talk,” he pleaded.

You stepped aside reluctantly, letting him in. He walked into the living room, turning to face you with regret etched on his face.

”I’m sorry, Y/N,” he started, his voice soft as he ran a hand over his face. ”I didn’t mean what I said. I was frustrated— but that’s no excuse.”

”You really hurt me,” you said, crossing your arms defensively knowing you had to support yourself before you start crying again. ”And you were so fucking cruel about it!”

”I know, and I hate that I did that to you,” he replied, his eyes sincere. ”I’ve been spending too much time with her, and I’ve been blind to how it’s been affecting you— us. Affecting us.”

”Why do you keep seeing her then? If she’s just a friend, why does it feel like she’s more important than me?” you demanded, your voice shaking.

”She’s not more important than you,” he said quickly. ”I’ve let the boundaries blur, and I didn’t realize how much it was hurting you. I’m sorry.”

Tears welled up in your eyes, but you blinked them away. This was not what you expected. You were ready for a fight, sure that Lewis would come with his own weapons out but this was undoing you.

”It’s not just about her, Lewis. It’s about us. You’ve been distant, and I feel like I’m losing you.”

Lewis nodded, looking pained and sick. ”You’re not losing me, Y/N. I’ve been an idiot, and I’ve taken you for granted. I want to fix this.”

”How?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. Desperately clinging onto him to make amends because you couldn’t see any in hindsight.

”By being more present, by setting boundaries, and by showing you every day how much you mean to me,” he said, taking your hands in his. ”Please give me a chance to make this right.”

”Words aren’t enough anymore,” you said, looking down at your joined hands.

”I know,” he nodded. ”But I'm willing to go through any lengths, I’ll prove to you that you’re my priority.”

You searched his eyes, seeing the determination and regret. ”I want to trust you,” as your voice cracked, the very first tear fell down your face and Lewis immediately grabbed you as he pulled you to lay your head on his chest.

”I can’t though— I wish I could but I can't get hurt again.”

”I understand and I promise you can shoot me if I hurt you again” he said. ”I love you, Y/N. I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right.”

You leaned into his embrace, feeling a flicker of hope amidst the pain. ”I love you too.” You felt him take a sigh as he held you tight against his warm body.

”And I need you to understand that my feelings are valid,” you continued as you soaked his shirt with your tears. ”When I tell you something bothers me, I need you to listen and not dismiss it.”

”I promise I’ll listen,” he said, his voice full of sincerity. ”I’ll do better because losing you would end me.”

You took a deep breath, feeling a weight lift slightly. As you stood there in your boyfriend’s arms, you realized that healing would take time but there was no one else you would rather heal with. Though only time could tell what the future held for you.

Oscar Piastri

You closed your eyes as you heard the door of your best friend's apartment being knocked on again. Your mind was a whirlwind of emotions—anger, betrayal, sadness.

You replayed the messages over and over in your head, each one cutting deeper than the last as you contemplated whether letting Oscar in would be a good decision. You finally made the decision when you heard the neighbor’s lock moving.

You pulled him in before they could open their door or call the cops and finally took a look at him. He looked disheveled. His eyes were red from holding unshed tears as they glossed over once he finally took you in.

”Y/N,” Oscar started, moving towards you with open arms. ”Thanks for letting me in.”

”I almost didn't.” You crossed your arms over your chest, trying to keep your voice steady as you stepped away from his open arms. ”But you were waking up the whole damn building.”

Oscar nodded, looking down at the ground. ”I deserve that.” You took a deep breath, desperate to get this over with.

”Why, Oscar? Why did you lie to me?”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. ”I... I was scared you'd get upset. I thought if I told you the truth, you'd leave me.”

”And now?” you scoffed, your voice rising. ”You think I'm not upset now? You think lying to me makes it any better?”

He stepped closer, his eyes pleading. ”Y/N, I made a mistake. A huge mistake. But nothing happened between me and her, I swear. We were drunk, and she sat on my lap for a picture. It was stupid and irresponsible, but that's all it was.”

You shook your head, tears welling up in your eyes. ”Do you have any idea how that made me feel? Seeing her on your lap after you told me she wasn't even going to be there?”

Oscar reached out to touch your arm, but you stepped back once again and his eyes brimmed with tears. ”Y/N, please. I love you. I was an idiot, but I love you. I need you to believe that.”

You wiped your eyes, trying to compose yourself. ”How can I believe you, Oscar? When I don't even know if you really want me?”

He swallowed hard, his tears finally falling out of his eyes. Oscar looked defeated as if he was fighting a battle already lost.

”Please don’t say that. You’re the only person I want. I'll do whatever it takes to earn your trust back. I'll never lie to you again. I'll be completely honest, even if it's something I think will hurt you. Just... please give me a chance to make it right.”

You looked at him, searching his face for any sign of deception. You saw only earnest regret and a desperate longing for forgiveness. You wanted to believe him, but the hurt was still so raw.

”I don't know if I can,” you whispered. ”You've broken my trust, Oscar. And that's not something you can just fix with words.”

He nodded slowly. ”I know. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes. I'll go to counseling, I'll give you access to my phone, my social media, anything you need to feel secure. Just please, don’t give up on us.”

You stood in silence for a moment, the weight of the situation heavy in the air. You looked around the dimly lit apartment, as you took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts.

”Okay,” you said finally. ”I’m willing to discuss this in the morning. But if you lie to me again, if you hurt me again, we're done. Do you understand?”

Oscar's face lit up with a mixture of relief and determination as his chest heaved. ”I understand. I promise you, Y/N, I'll never give you a reason to doubt me again.”

You nodded, as your lips quivered. ”I hope so. Because I don't think I can go through this again.”

He stepped closer, cautiously taking your hand. You allowed it, feeling the warmth of his touch. ”Thank you,” he said softly. ”I won't let you down.”

You stood together, still holding hands. The silence between you was different now—tentative, but with a flicker of understanding. You had a long way to go, but for the first time since those fateful messages, you felt like maybe, just maybe, not all was lost.

( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

Can I request some more angst 🫠🫠 I’m a sucker for your sad fics

tell me, why'd you have to hit-and-run me?

★ : summary :: finding out your boyfriend was dared to date you ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: ANGST; no hea ★ : word count :: 4k+ ★ : a/n :: how are we feeling with the daily posts ending tom and shifting to alternate day posting🤭 babe you asked for angst and i delivered, lmk how you like it <3 bet y'all thought you needed tissues for something else😏

Max Verstappen

“Mate, you still haven’t told her?” you heard Lando whisper, making your eyebrows shoot up. What were they talking about? As you finally decided to approach your boyfriend and his friend, you heard Max whisper.

It was low, so low that you almost didn’t catch it, but the way your hand froze on the knob and the utter stillness of your heartbeat indicated that you heard him loud and clear when he slowly said, “I don’t know how to.”

That. That was the reason you froze. You were processing what you heard. Your heart pulled from its rightful place—no, it was ripped out.

God, you thought, anything but that. Anything but cheating because how could you even confront him if he confessed to cheating on you right there on the spot in front of one of his friends?

“It has been going on for too long, Max.” Lando took a deep breath. “You should tell her you love her; she’ll understand.”

Ah. Okay, he loves you; this was okay. But then why was your heart still beating so loudly that you could hear it in your ears?

“How do you think I should go about it?” Max asked, and that was when you finally had enough. You turned the knob, but Lando was already speaking, and his words had you freeze again.

The boys' heads snapped up, eyes wide when they saw you walk in. You felt your eyes burn as Lando’s last words finally processed.

“You should’ve thought about it before you decided to make a stupid bet with those dumb men.”

“Bet?” you wondered aloud as you saw Max stumble over to you. What bet?

“No bet!” you heard your panicked boyfriend almost scream. You were so confused you didn’t even know what you were saying out loud.

“For fuck’s sake,” Lando said as he stood from the couch, glaring at Max. “Y/N deserves to know.” You kept your eyes on Max, trying to gauge an explanation from his clearly messed-up state.

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” you finally looked at your boyfriend’s best friend. “I clearly shouldn’t have trusted Max to—”

“I think you should leave,” Max groaned out as if it pained him to hear Lando talk, almost hissing out the last word. They started bickering back and forth, and through your hazy mind, you could only make out a few words.

But they were enough. You took a deep breath as you stepped away from Max towards the door. He was too busy focusing on Lando anyway.

“Y.. you’re saying I was a bet?” Your voice cut through the chaos, and it was Max’s turn to go dead silent and freeze on the spot.

“You asked me ou—” Oh god, you didn’t want to cry, “—because of a dare?”

Max’s eyes were wide with horror, his face pale as he took a step toward you, his hands reaching out in desperation. “No, Y/N, it’s not like that, please, let me explain.”

You shook your head, tears streaming down your cheeks uncontrollably. “Explain what, Max?” Your voice cracked on the last word, the pain too raw to hold back when you saw Max was also crying. “How a…all i have be— this relationship has been is a fucking lie?” The moment you said it out loud, you heard Lando take in a sharp breath. Max looked disheveled, he could just tell that this was the only time he could repair this. You looked a minute away from walking out and the thought of that had him talking even through his closed up throat.

His voice broke, choked with emotion. “No, Y/N, I swear, it wasn’t like that. It started as a stupid dare, yes, but then... then I fell in love with you. I fell so hard, it—” His words stumbled over each other, barely coherent through his tears. “I called the whole thing off.”

You cut him off, your voice trembling and thick with hurt. “You should have told me right then. As soon as you called it off, you sho—” Your body shook, barely able to stand under the weight of your heartbreak. “How could you do this to m.. me?”

Max rushed forward to hold your hands, breathing heavily to get himself under control so he could talk as he sobbed. “I was so fucking scared, Y/N. I didn’t want to lose you. You mean everything to me.”

You looked down at your joined hands, feeling your heart shatter all over again. It was one thing to know someone’s apology was sincere and another to know that they had faked being sincere from the very beginning. So how could you even tell the difference now? Your voice came out in a broken whisper. “How can I trust you now? How can I believe anything you say?” You were almost gasping for breath, each word an effort as you tried to hold back the sobs wracking your body.

Lando’s voice was soft but firm from behind you, though his own eyes were hard. “He’s telling the truth, Y/N. He was an idiot, but he’s been head over heels for you for a long time.”

Max’s tear-streaked face looked up at you, his eyes pleading. “Please, Y/N. I’ll do anything to make it up to you. Anything. Just... don’t leave me.” His voice broke, the last word coming out as a wail of despair.

You turned away, unable to bear the sight of him, your voice barely above a whisper but laced with raw agony. “I can’t be here.” You could barely see through your tears, your entire body trembling.

Max’s anguished sobs followed you as you walked away, your heart feeling like it was being torn from your chest with every step. The pain was unbearable, and you stumbled, nearly collapsing under the weight of your sorrow but Lando caught you as he held you by your shoulders.

You needed to be alone, to process everything, and to decide if love could truly overcome betrayal. But right now, it felt like your world was ending.

Lewis Hamilton

“Y/N, baby please—”

Lewis’s voice pleaded as you shut the door behind, your heart splintering into a thousand pieces. Tears blurred your vision as you staggered away from your apartment, the weight of betrayal crushing your chest.

To think that you used to gush about him, about this, the vague lie you had to others. Not even a few steps away from your apartment, you were bent over, retching into a nearby dustbin.

How could luck be so cruel? How could you have been so blind?

You wandered the streets, tears falling down your cheeks as your brain replayed the moments when Lewis first approached you at a random club party, despite your friends warning you that someone like him must have nefarious reasons. But you were smitten.

“I’m sorry, but I don't know what you’re doing here,” you had said to him, feeling your heart beat faster when a smirk adorned his face in return. He looked majestic under the club lights. “Where else would I be?” he muttered, mesmerized as he looked at you, “If not with the most beautiful girl in this club?”

He made you feel special, validated in a way you had never felt before. Now, the memory turned sour in your mind, leaving you feeling sick and disgusted. You dry heaved again.

At least he had the decency to confess. Standing here in the cold, his words from when he sat you down with him echoed in your ears— his pleading, his apologies, his desperate attempts to explain. But what did it matter now?

“How could you?” you whispered, thump! thump! thump! your heart pumped as you heard it in your ears, your voice barely audible through the tears streaming down your cheeks. “Was I just a game to you?” That was the first thing you said after his almost ten-minute rant.

You had stopped listening though, right when he had told you what exactly made him approach you. Your first meeting was so magical, so precious to you, but it was all ruined now.

His friend had dared him because Lewis’ morale was down. He was having the worst day of his life after losing an almost sure race win, and his friends knew the only way to cheer him up was through a challenge.

Lewis reached out when he saw that you were lost in your thoughts, his voice desperate and shaky. “No, Y/N, please listen to me—”

You shook your head, cutting him off. “Don’t. Just don’t…”

“Please,” he pleaded, looking nothing like the man you loved, his voice cracking with emotion. “I love you, Y/N. I messed up, but I love you more than anything.”

You felt your heart breaking all over again because you genuinely couldn’t recognize the man standing in front of you— the man who had played you, was probably still playing you. “You should have thought about that before…”

Unable to bear another moment, you left, leaving his words hanging in the air like a dark cloud. You were nothing more than a pawn in his game of masculine pride and insecurity. The realization hit you like a freight train, leaving you gasping for air as you collapsed against a nearby wall, sobs wracking your body.

How could someone who once made you feel so alive now leave you feeling so broken?

Carlos Sainz

The evening was warm, and the restaurant buzzed with laughter and conversation. You sat with your boyfriend, Carlos, his friends, and a few of your own. It was a casual dinner, the kind you rarely held since Carlos was so busy.

“I can't believe we wouldn’t be here if I hadn’t dared Carlos to ask you out,” Javier chuckled as he saw you lean forward to kiss your boyfriend.

Laughter erupted around the table but quickly died down when they realized the utter horror on your face. An uncomfortable silence settled in, and you noticed the tension.

Your wide eyes moved from one face to another, finally landing on Carlos, whose expression had turned serious. He glared at Javier, and you sensed something was wrong. You felt uncomfortable, and the need to flee clutched you.

“What do you mean?” you asked, your voice small yet cutting through the awkwardness as you held Carlos’ hand under the table. He squeezed it in return.

“Uh, nothing,” Javier stammered, realizing his mistake. His discomfort was evident, triggering your fight-or-flight response.

You turned to Carlos. “What’s going on?” Your voice held a very tiny hope, hoping this was all a prank that would be over soon.

He sighed as he squeezed your hand again, his frustration evident. “We should talk about this at home.”

You pulled your hand away from his, your confusion and hurt growing. The others at the table exchanged looks of pity, further igniting your anger.

“No, we’re talking about it here. What’s going on?” you demanded as a shaky breath left your lips.

Carlos looked around nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t want to tell you like this.” He stopped himself again.

“Tell me what?” Your voice grew louder, drawing the attention of nearby diners.

Before he could respond, one of your friends, Beatrice, chimed in, “Just tell her, for God’s sake!” You looked at her in solitude, glad that you had some kind of support here.

“I dared Carlos to ask you out as a joke!” Javier blurted out just as you were managing to form a small smile to pass to your friend.

Your heart pounded in your chest. “What?” The chair creaked under you as you pushed it away from the table, and your boyfriend held your hand again.

“Please, it wasn’t like that,” Carlos tried to calm you down, but he was panicking himself. He was still whispering that you could not feel anything else in the world anymore. That was enough evidence.

You stood up, knocking your chair over as you once again snatched your hand away from his. “Wasn’t like what? You made me believe this was fucking real!”

Other diners began to whisper and pull out their phones, recording the scene as he stood up as well. With a desperate look, Carlos reached out to you, but you stepped back.

“This whole time, I was just a fucking… dare to you?” you shouted.

People around the restaurant started filming, their phones pointed at the escalating scene. Carlos's anger boiled over. He grabbed a nearby phone and smashed it against the table. The room fell silent, shocked gasps filling the air.

“Carlos, stop!” One of his friends tried to pull him back.

“You all think this is funny?” Carlos yelled at the onlookers, distracted now, and you knew what you were going to do as he turned around to yell again. “Get your own fucking life!”

You stood up, tears streaming down your face. “I’m done with this,” you said, your voice breaking. You were already walking away when you felt your friend follow you.

As you left the restaurant, you could hear the whispers and see the flashes of cameras. You knew this would go viral, but at that moment, you didn’t care. Your heart ached with betrayal and anger.

Carlos realized a bit too late that you were gone. Frustrated, he ran out to catch up with you and tried to call you again and again.He didn't know at the time that he would never catch a hold of you after this.

Charles Leclerc

You were scrolling through social media when a notification from an unknown sender caught your attention. Despite knowing that you shouldn’t, curiosity got the better of you, and you clicked on the thumbnail showing your boyfriend at a party.

The video started playing. It was from months ago, showing Charles in an outfit that you recognized but couldn’t remember from where. Ethan's voice could be heard clearly over the music. “I dare you to ask that girl out,” Ethan said, laughing, but you still couldn’t tell who he was pointing at. “Bet you can't do it.”

Charles grinned, looking a little tipsy. “You're on,” he replied, to the cheers and jeers of his friends. The grainy video ended with Charles approaching you. A deafening silence enveloped you when you realized this was from the day you first met him.

Charles had a determined look on his face, but the video faded into the background. Your thoughts echoed painfully in the emptiness, the truth of your lover's betrayal reverberating within you.

Your heart sank further as you sat in silence to process. You felt a rush of emotions— betrayal, hurt, and anger. Tears welled up in your eyes as you replayed the video, hoping it was some sort of sick joke. But the evidence was right there, undeniable.

At that moment, the door to the apartment opened, and Charles walked in, a smile on his face. “Hey, love. What are you up to?” he asked, not noticing your distress at first.

You turned to him, your eyes brimming with tears. “What is this?” you demanded, holding up your phone with the video paused at the damning moment.

Charles's smile faded instantly, replaced by a look of horror. “Baby, how did you—” he started, stepping towards you as he felt the room spin a bit, all the blood rushing to his head.

“Does it matter?” you snapped, your voice shaking with anger as tears gathered under your eyes. “When you only even looked at me because of a stupid bet?”

“It started as a bet, yes,” Charles admitted, his voice pained. “But it's not like that now. I fell in love with you, Y/N. Everything we've had since then has been real.” He was quickly getting closer to you, but you flinched away and that stopped him dead in his tracks.

You shook your head, unable to believe what you were hearing. “Who the fuck do you think you are?” You were so angry, your ears so warm that it wouldn’t be impossible if smoke started coming out of them.

Charles reached out, but you stepped back once again. “Please, Y/N. I was an idiot. I shouldn't have agreed to that dare, but I did. And yes, that's how it started. But the moment I got to know you, everything changed. I love you more than anything.”

“Do you have any idea just how humiliating this is?” you shouted, your voice breaking. “I thought what we had was special. I thought it was real. And now I find out it was all… a gamble to you.” You hated that you were showing him so many emotions but fuck, it hurt so much and you wish you could hurt him back.

“It is not a gamble,” Charles pleaded, tears forming in his eyes. “Not after I got to know you. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. Please, don't let this ruin us.” He could actually feel you slipping through his fingers.

“Fuck you, you’re the one who ruined this!” you said, turning away, trying to gather your thoughts, willing yourself to leave and hating yourself when you couldn’t. “Seriously,” you said quietly, not looking at him. “Fuck you.” You laid emphasis to show that you actually meant the words. “You’ve ruined me”

“Baby,” Charles's voice broke when he heard you say that he ruined you, but the way you glared at him because of the nickname had him backtracking. “Y/N, please just let me show you how that was all a lie. I love you. I can't fucking lose you over this.”

You walked to the door, needing to escape the suffocating atmosphere. “It is still all a lie,” you declared in a voice that showed you were shutting down, barely above a whisper.

As you stepped out of the apartment, you heard Charles crying behind you, but you didn’t stop to mend his heart because you couldn't even feel yours in your chest.

Lando Norris

Lando’s phone buzzed with notifications as he stepped out of the room and you glanced at it absentmindedly, not intending to invade his privacy. But the screen lit up with messages from his friends’ group chat, and the first few lines caught your eye, seeing your name in them.

“Can’t believe Lando actually went through with it.” “I know, right? It’s hilarious that she still doesn’t know!”

Your heart sank as you read further, each message a dagger to your trust. They were discussing you— about Lando making a bet involving you. Your hands trembled, and you scrolled through the conversation, your worst fears unfolding before your eyes.

“Thought he’d be gloating but he hasn’t contacted at all.” “Shit, man, he’s been with her for a year. I'm not paying him that much!”

You felt sick to your stomach. The room spun around you as you struggled to comprehend the magnitude of the betrayal. All those times you believed in Lando, trusted him with your heart— were they all just part of a cruel scheme? A fucking game?

You heard Lando approaching, unaware that you had seen everything. His smile faded as he saw the look on your face, the phone still clutched tightly in your hand.

“What’s wrong?” he asked cautiously, sensing the tension in the air as he approached you with wide eyes.

This has happened before. Lando was always scared of coming home and finding it empty because you had found out about something he was afraid to tell you but in the past he was always wrong. It was a show, a friend, a book making you cry but today was different.

You held up the phone, your voice trembling with a mix of anger and hurt. “Care to explain this?”

Lando’s expression shifted from confusion to dread as he realized what had just happened. He opened his mouth to speak, but you cut him off with a bitter laugh.

“Fuck, you really had me convinced!” Your voice was sharp, cutting through the air like a knife. “You made a bet? How much have you made so far, Mr. Norris?”

“Don't say that,” Lando looked like you had slapped him across his face. He reached out to you, his face pleading for forgiveness. “Y/N, I swear it wasn’t like that—”

“How much was it?” you demanded, the words laced with bitterness. “Bet you made a lot the day you finally got laid, huh?” “No!” Your boyfrie— ex-boyfriend screamed. His eyes were carrying moisture and you couldn’t help but scoff but he carried on. “I never took a single penny, Y/N. I.. I promise, I hadn’t even talked to them since the day i realized what assholes they were and—”

Lando’s face fell, his words faltering as he rushed forward to catch you in his arms, his tears finally falling once he saw your wet face. But the truth hung heavy in the silence between you, suffocating any hope of reconciliation.

Tears fell down your cheeks onto his arm as he kissed your head and whispered sweet nothings and sorry, I’m so sorry so so sorry sorry sorry, again and again against your head, blurring your vision. “I trusted you,” you whispered, voice breaking. “I loved you.”

The weight of it all settled on you, and you sank deeper into the couch, overwhelmed by the betrayal. The anger that fueled you moments ago now gave way to a deep, searing pain. How could he have done this to you?

Lando kneeled down before you, his own tears betraying the magnitude of his mistake. “I’m sorry,” he choked out, reaching for you. “I never meant for you to find out.”

He carried on but your ears started ringing when the words registered. Wouldn’t a person with nothing to be guilty about, accept the truth and make up? Why was he so hell bent on keeping it under a hush?

His words felt hollow, empty promises in the wake of his betrayal and you cut him off as you pushed him away from you . “Get out,” you managed to say, your voice hoarse.

Lando hesitated, torn between wanting to explain and knowing that no explanation would mend what was broken. “Please,” you whispered and it was so small, so scared that he got up immediately and nodded.

He kissed your head again and you let him linger as you closed your eyes,“I.. I’ll be back, baby.” With a final, agonized look at you, he turned and left, leaving you alone in the wreckage of your shattered trust.

The silence enveloped you, broken only by your ragged breaths and the echoes of his footsteps fading away. You hugged yourself tightly, trying to hold together the pieces of your heart that he had callously shattered.

As the tears continued to fall, you felt a different kind of ache—the ache of knowing that the love you had believed in was now a painful memory because yes, he was coming back but you wouldn’t be here.

Later, Lando would enter the house in hopes of finding you but just like his worst nightmare, you wouldn’t be there. You wouldn’t be there to hold him as he’ll slowly lose it running across the house while he’ll look for you. None of your things would be there.

Yes, he destroyed you but also himself.

( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

something based on ‘casual’ by chapell roan or ‘sharpest tool’ by sabrina carpenter with f1 drivers 🥹🥹🥹🥹

is it casual now?

★ : summary :: when you mistake your fuckbuddy for a lover ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: ANGST; no hea; kinda smutty ★ : word count:: 6.1k+ ★ : a/n:: im afraid there will be no part 2s to this.. the premise of the song is a vicious cycle so NO happy endings!! hope y/n was smart enough to get him tested and use protection yikes.

MAX VERSTAPPEN

“then, baby, get me off again.”

You watched with hazy eyes as Max moved above you, his body pressing into yours with a rhythm that left you gasping, begging for breath. The pulse under your wrist raced in time with his movements, heart pounding so hard it felt like it might break through your ribs. His hands gripped your hips, fingers digging into your skin with a desperation that had your mind spinning.

Every time he thrust back into you, it sent a shockwave of pleasure rippling through your body, making your back arch a bit more. You could feel it building, the tension between you teetering on the edge of something explosive.

“Fuck, b-baby,” Max growled, voice thick and raw, the sound of it sending shivers up your spine, making your blood hum. His breath was ragged, his eyes locked onto yours, dark with need as if he was barely holding himself together.

Your heart raced even faster, chest tightening, and you bit your lip, smirking as you shifted slightly running your finger across your lip, driving his attention back to the deep red lipstick you knew was driving him wild. His gaze flicked down, his pupils dilating as he caught sight of it, and you saw the way his breath hitched, his body faltering for just a moment as he fought to keep control.

“That fucking lipstick…” he groaned, the words half-muttered, half-moan, and you could feel his grip tighten on you, his fingers pressing harder into your skin.

Your head was spinning, legs shaky beneath his weight, every nerve in your body alive with sensation as you dragged your nails down his back. “Ins-inside me, Max,” you whispered, your voice a breathless challenge.

The words seemed to push him over the edge, his finger on your clit flattered, his pace becoming erratic as he thrust into you one last time, his entire body tensing as he came undone. The sensation of him finally letting go pulled you under, your own release hitting you in waves so intense it left you trembling beneath him, vision hazy.

For a moment, everything was quiet, the room filled only with the sound of your labored breathing. Your body was heavy, every limb buzzing as you lay there in the afterglow, Max collapsing beside you, his arm still draped over your waist. You turned your head to look at him, the lazy, satisfied smile on your lips reflecting the warmth spreading through your chest.

“That was…” you started, voice soft and shaky, your heart still racing. You couldn’t find the words to finish, but the look in your eyes said enough. It was perfect. It was everything.

Max chuckled, low and rough, turning his head to meet your gaze. “Yeah, baby, it was,” his thumb brushing lightly across your hip, grounding you in the moment. For a second, it felt like nothing could shatter this— like you were exactly where you were meant to be.

Then his phone buzzed.

The sharp sound sliced through the room, breaking the intimacy in an instant. You watched as Max reached for it without hesitation, his movements almost casual, but there was something about the way his body shifted- just a little too quickly- that sent a shiver down your spine. Your stomach clenched, heart dropping as you felt that familiar knot of uncertainty begin to form.

You didn’t say anything at first, trying to ignore the tension building in your chest, but when you saw the way his eyes refused to meet yours, how he turned the screen away from you slightly as he checked the message, you couldn’t stay quiet any longer.

“Who’s that?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper, but he could hear the edge of insecurity in your tone. Your heart hammered in your chest, blood rushing to your ears as you waited for his response, hoping it wouldn’t be what you feared.

Max glanced at you, too casually, placing the phone down without really answering. “It’s nothing,” he said, his voice light, but it felt forced, like he wasn’t taking this seriously. He tried to brush it off, turning back to you with a small smile. “Just a friend.”

Your stomach dropped. The words hit you like a punch to the gut, and suddenly, your whole body felt cold, legs unsteady as you sat up in bed. Your mind raced, the warmth from moments ago replaced by a growing sense of dread. You knew this feeling all too well, the doubt creeping in and wrapping around your heart like a vice.

“A friend?” you echoed, barely able to keep your voice steady as the room spun slightly. Your fingers gripped the sheets tightly, trying to anchor yourself. “What’s just a friend, huh?”

Max sighed, clearly not wanting to have this conversation. “Come on, Y/N, it’s not a big deal,” he said, his tone frustratingly calm. “You know how it is.”

But you didn’t know how it was. Not really. Each beat of your heart sent waves of anger and hurt crashing through you, blood rushing so loud in your ears you could barely hear him. “What do you mean, ‘not a big deal?’” you asked, your voice shaking as your breath quickened. 

You could feel your throat tighten, the sting of tears threatening to form behind your eyes, but you fought them back. You needed answers. This game of guessing and hoping was getting old now.

Max rubbed the back of his neck, looking uncomfortable now, as if he wanted to be anywhere else but here, dealing with this, dealing with you. “Y/N, we’re not together,” he said, finally, his words blunt, like a slap across the face.

Your world tilted. You froze, unable to process his words for a moment, your chest tightening so painfully it felt like you might not be able to breathe. We’re not together. We’re not together. We’re not together. We’re n- The sentence echoed in your mind again and again, each word hitting harder than the last.

Your vision blurred as you pushed the sheets off your legs and swung them over the edge of the bed, standing on shaky legs that barely supported you. The room felt like it was spinning, and you had to steady yourself against the wall as you tried to hold it together.

“We’re not together?” you repeated, voice barely audible. You felt your heart break in real time, the cracks forming so fast it left you breathless. It was useless, this was all useless but our mouth wouldn’t shut up. “So what the hell have we been doing, Max? What am I to you?”

He looked at you, his expression unreadable. For a moment, just a fleeting second, you thought you saw a flicker of guilt cross his face, but then it was gone, replaced by indifference. “It’s just laid back between us,” he said, his voice still maddeningly calm. “Don’t make it more than that.”

Your blood turned to ice, legs almost giving out beneath you. That’s all it was to him. Just fun. You felt sick, a cold wave of nausea rolling over you as your chest tightened, the weight of it making it hard to breathe. You had let yourself believe you meant something more to him, that this connection wasn’t ‘laid back.’

You swallowed hard, fighting the tears that were now almost on the verge of falling. “I can’t do this,” you said, voice barely steady, as you started grabbing your clothes from the floor, your fingers trembling. “I’m not just s-some girl.. I’m not a laid back girl.”

Max sighed, standing up and running a hand through his messy hair. “Y/N, come on, don’t do this,” he said, but there was no urgency in his voice. No real concern. Just a tired resignation, like he’d been through this before ample times and for once, you knew that he has.

Screw your heart for hoping for something better though. You slipped on your shoes, moving toward the door with legs that felt like they could give out at any second, nodding your head as you tried to make sense of what exactly was happening.

As your hand reached for the door handle, you heard him say your name. There was a slight panic in his voice now, but it was too late. You couldn’t do this anymore. You couldn’t be the girl who stayed.

Without turning around, you stepped into the hallway, letting the door close behind you. But as soon as the elevator doors shut, trapping you inside, the sobs came. You pressed your back against the cool metal, sliding down to the floor as your legs gave out beneath you, the weight of it all crashing down at once. Your heart was shattered, your mind spinning as you tried to make sense of what had just happened. You had meant nothing to him. Nothing. It was just cruel of him to confirm it instead of comforting you.

Two days later, you stood in front of the mirror in your bathroom, the events of that night replaying in your mind on an endless loop.

Your phone buzzed on the counter. You glanced down, seeing his name flash across the screen. Your heart skipped a beat, fingers trembling as you picked it up, the pain still fresh.

You good?

You worked in a haste after that, applying your makeup robotically, working off of muscle memory. till suddenly your handstopped. The lipstick suspended just above your lips. The question seemed so casual, so empty. After everything that had happened, all he could do was leave a text?

Your chest still ached, your eyes red from crying, but your hands were steady as you applied the deep red lipstick that had always drove him crazy. You stared at your reflection, the bright red color a sharp contrast to your pale, tear-stained skin. You felt hollow inside, but you were determined not to show it.

You took a deep breath, staring at yourself in the mirror, and then put the phone down without responding, finishing your lipstick with a steady hand. You didn’ have to text him back to let him know that you were coming over.

LEWIS HAMILTON

“and i try to be the chill girl, that holds her tongue and gives you space, i try to be the chill girl.”

The bathroom was colder than you expected, the chill from the tiles seeping into your skin as you leaned against the sink, your heart racing with anticipation. You gave your reflection a quick once-over, fixing your hair and adjusting the neckline of your dress.

You felt pretty, wanted, and the night felt like it could be perfect—the first real date with Lewis. It wasn’t some glamorous dinner, but he’d asked you out, and that was enough to send butterflies fluttering through your chest.

With one last deep breath, you stepped out of the bathroom and made your way back toward the bar. But as you approached, the sound of his voice- low, smooth, flirtatious- stopped you in your tracks. Your stomach twisted, the butterflies quickly turning into a knot of dread.

“I can’t believe someone like you is single,” Lewis said, his tone dripping with charm, the kind of charm that had reeled you in not so long ago.

Your steps flattered as your feet stopped moving, your heart pounding so hard it echoed in your ears. You moved closer, just enough to peek around the corner, and there he was. Your Lewis, leaning against the bar, his body angled toward a blonde woman sitting beside him. She was smiling, twirling her hair around her finger, her laughter light and flirtatious. And he wasn’t just letting her do it—he was engaging, smiling that same smile that used to make you feel special.

Your breath caught in your throat as you watched her lean in closer, her fingers brushing against his arm. He didn’t move away. He didn’t stop her. Instead, he laughed, that deep, charming laugh that you had fallen for, and replied to something that woman had said, “Maybe I just haven’t met the right girl yet.”

It made you want to throw up.

It was a punch to the gut. Your legs felt weak, your head pounding so hard you thought it might burst. You swallowed hard, trying to keep the emotions bubbling up inside you under control. Be cool, be chill. You weren’t going to make a scene. Not here, not now. You were supposed to be the girl who didn’t get jealous, who didn’t lose her cool.

But fuck, it was killing you inside. Lewis was killing you.

Taking a deep breath, you walked over, forcing a smile even though your entire body felt like it was on fire with hurt and jealousy. As you approached, Lewis glanced up and spotted you, his expression shifting for just a moment- was that guilt?- before the charm was back. “Hey,” he said, sliding his arm around your waist firmly, like nothing was wrong.

The blonde woman blinked in surprise, glancing between you and Lewis, clearly caught off guard. “Oh… I didn’t realize you were with someone,” she said, her voice uncertain now, her smile faltering.

Lewis smiled, a little too nonchalant for your liking. “This is Y/N,” he said, his hand still resting on your waist, burning into your skin through the clothes. “She’s just a friend.”

Your throat felt tight, the words hitting you like ice water. Just a friend. The knot in your stomach tightened painfully, but you forced a smile, trying to hold it together. You nodded at the woman, just to acknowledge her.

It was not her fault but fuck you hated her and how pretty she was. Of course, Lewis was picking her over you. You could feel your throat tightening, the sting of tears threatening to blur your vision, but you refused to let them fall. Not here. Not in front of him or her.

The bartender, who had been quietly pouring drinks nearby, glanced at you with a look that made you want to disappear. She looked uncomfortable, like she had just witnessed something she wasn’t supposed to. “Can I get you something?” she asked, clearing her throat, her voice a little awkward.

You shook your head, not trusting yourself to speak. You needed to get away, to breathe, but you couldn’t move, your legs rooted to the spot as Lewis gave the blonde one last charming smile before turning back to you.

“You good?” he asked, his tone too casual, as if he hadn’t just flirted with someone else right in front of you. His arm tightened around your waist, and you felt like you were going to explode.

Your pulse quickened, blood rushing in your ears as your mind raced. You wanted to scream, to ask him how he could do this, but instead, you bit your tongue, forcing yourself to stay calm. You were supposed to be the chill girl. The one who didn’t make a scene.

“I’m fine,” you lied, your voice barely above a whisper. The words tasted bitter on your tongue, but you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything else.

The blonde, sensing the awkward tension, quickly excused herself, slipping away into the crowd. You watched her go, the hurt bubbling up inside you so fast it made you feel dizzy. You turned to face Lewis, your chest tight with the weight of everything you weren’t saying.

“Really?” you asked despite every nerve in your body begging you not to, your voice trembling slightly despite your best efforts to keep it steady. “Just a friend?”

Lewis sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, clearly not wanting to deal with this right now. “Come on, darling, don’t be like this,” he said, his tone light, dismissive, like this wasn’t a big deal. Like you weren’t a big deal.

Your heart twisted painfully, but you forced yourself to keep your voice calm. “You invited me out tonight. We were supposed to spend time together, and I come back and you’re flirting with someone else?”

He shrugged, his expression indifferent. “I was just being friendly. It’s not like we’re together or anything.”

Those words sent a sharp pain shooting through your chest, and for a moment, you couldn’t breathe. You stared at him, your heart sinking, feeling like the floor had just dropped out from under you. Not together. The truth of it hit you like a slap to the face.

You swallowed hard, the sting of tears burning behind your eyes. “Then what are we doing, Lewis?” you asked, your voice small, almost pleading. “Because I’m not just here to be another girl you take out for fun.”

He sighed again, looking away like he was bored with the conversation already. “We’re having fun, Y/N. Why do you have to make it more complicated than that?”

Your heart broke a little more with every word, but you refused to cry. You refused to let him see how much this was hurting you. “I’m not asking for much,” you said, your voice cracking slightly. “I just… I thought maybe this was more than just casual.”

Lewis looked at you then, really looked at you, you expecting something- anything, love, affection, misery— hell just regret would’ve worked too. However, you got nothing but a dismissal. “I do like you, Y/N. But you know that I’m not looking for anything serious.”

The final nail in the coffin. Your breath caught in your throat, and you had to look away, your vision blurring as the tears finally threatened to spill over. You felt like you were crumbling from the inside out, but you couldn’t let him see that. You had to hold it together, at least until you were out of here.

“I see,” you whispered, nodding as you tried to swallow the pain, blinking rapidly.

Lewis reached for your hand, his touch warm but not comforting anymore. “Look, I’ll take you home if you want. Or… we can head back to mine. It’s up to you.”

Your heart stuttered, the decision hanging heavily between you. So that’s what today was about? He was giving you an out, a chance to walk away from this before it hurt even more. But deep down, you knew you weren’t ready to let go. You weren’t ready to walk away from the hope, no matter how small, that maybe, just maybe, things could change.

So you nodded, forcing a smile that didn’t reach your eyes. “Your place sounds nice.”

The words felt like a betrayal to yourself, but you couldn’t take them back now. As Lewis led you toward the exit, you glanced back at the bartender, who watched you with a look that seemed to say I’m sorry. But you weren’t sure if she was sorry for what she’d witnessed, or for the fact that you were still walking out with him.

Either way, it didn’t matter. Because tonight, you had again chosen heartbreak over being alone.

CARLOS SAINZ

“i know what you tell your friends, baby, get me off again.”

As you sat on the edge of Carlos’ childhood bed, strapping on your heels, the warm glow of his family’s home lingered in your mind. The day had been a whirlwind of laughter and warmth, filled with his mother’s delicious cooking and moments that made you feel like you truly belonged. You felt hopeful, almost giddy as you shared dessert with his sisters, swapping stories and jokes.

It was a stretch, you knew but the smile wouldn’t get off of your face, imagining a future where you were part of this family.

But now, as you glanced at yourself in the mirror, the reflection staring back felt fragile. The soft makeup you had carefully applied that morning seemed like a mask, hiding the anxiety brewing inside. Your heart raced as you replayed the events of the evening—how comfortable it had been to be with them, how easy it was to laugh and connect.

Just as you finished adjusting your dress, you heard Carlos’ voice float down the hallway, mingled with his sister’s. You froze, your heart sinking as you listened intently.

“Did you really bring her here thinking it wasn’t serious?” his sister’s voice was sharp, filled with disbelief.

“Can you just drop it?” Carlos replied, his tone a mix of irritation and indifference. “It’s not like that with us.”

You felt your breath catch in your throat, a chill running down your spine. It’s not like that with us. The words echoed in your mind, slicing through the warm memories of the evening, leaving only the cold sting of reality.

“She’s so sweet, Carlos. You’re just going to let her think there’s something more?” his sister pressed, concern etched in her voice. You felt thankful, maybe not every single person in this family was heartless after all.

“Not that it concerns you but it’s casual,” he said dismissively. “We’re not together, so just… let it go.”

Your heart dropped at his words, the sound of laughter from earlier now feeling like a cruel joke. You had let yourself believe that maybe this was something real, that you meant more to him than just a passing fling. But hearing him brush off your feelings so easily made you feel sick.

Fueled by anger and hurt, you stood up, shaking off the numbness that threatened to overtake you. You walked down the hallway, heart pounding in your chest, determined to confront him.

As you stepped into the living room, the cheerful atmosphere felt suffocating, his sister was nowhere to be found, probably leaving after her brother’s disgustig actions. 

“Carlos!” you called, cutting through the silence like a knife. He turned, surprised, and you could see the tension in his shoulders as he faced you.

“Hey, ready to go?” he asked, his voice casual, but you could see the flicker of doubt in his eyes. He knew why you were looking at him in disbelief and he did not know why it made his heart hurt.

You took a deep breath, forcing the words out. “Is this really just casual for you?” Your voice wavered but held an edge of steel.

“You were listening to us?” His expression hardened slightly, reason untold but he didn’t lose his cool, shrugging off with indifference. “You know what I mean. We’re not serious, and you can’t expect me to change that.”

“Why not?” you shot back, feeling the heat rise in your chest. “I spent the entire day with your family, Carlos! I laughed, I connected—I felt like I was part of something. And you’e just shrugging it off like it’s nothing?”

He opened his mouth to respond, but you pressed on, needing him to hear you. “You brought me here, made me feel welcomed, and then you act like I’m just some random fling. Do you even realize how that feels?”

Carlos’ eyes softened for a moment, but then he crossed his arms, a defensive gesture. “I didn’t mean for you to get the wrong idea. You know I like having you around.”

“Like?” The word slipped from your lips like a bitter pill, body shuddering. “Is that all it is to you? Just something you ‘like’?”

“I just don’t want you to get hurt,” he replied, his voice steady but distant. This was not the carlos you fell for, this wasn’t your carlos or maybe you were just blind. “I’m not ready for something serious.”

You shook your head, frustration boiling over. “You’re not even trying, Carlos. You keep me at arm’s length and expect me to just accept that? You seriously need to figure out what you want.”

He stared at you, the silence stretching uncomfortably between you two. You could see the conflict in his eyes, the way he wrestled with your words.You knew now that you were wrong to think that he set up this family lunch to introduce you to the family. He was just a clueless asshole in denial of his feelings.

“Maybe I don’t want to figure it out,” he said finally, his voice low. “Maybe I just want to enjoy what we have without any pressure.”

You scoffed, the pain in your chest feeling like it might burst. “Enjoying something doesn’t mean it has to be casual! It feels like I’m just a placeholder for you, and that’s not fair!”

Carlos opened his mouth to respond, but nothing came out. Instead, he looked at you with an expression you couldn’t quite read—was it regret? Or was it the realization that you were right?

You stood there, heart pounding, waiting for him to say something, anything. The seconds stretched painfully, each tick of the clock echoing your unspoken feelings.

Finally, you broke the silence. “You know what? I deserve more than this half-hearted relationship. I’ve been here, waiting for you to reach half way while you hold back.”

His eyes softened further, and he stepped closer, but you held your ground. “Don’t. Just… don’t,” you whispered, your voice trembling. “I can’t keep doing this if you can’t even acknowledge what we have.”

With that, you slipped away from his reach, feeling tears prick at the corners of your eyes. You didn’t want to give in to the hurt, but it was too late.

As you walked out to the car, you felt the weight of his gaze on your back, and though you wanted to turn around, to see if he would follow you, you held firm. You had to reclaim your own heart, even if it meant letting go of the warmth that had just started to blossom.

Inside the car, you tried to steady your breath, the silence heavy and charged. You were tired of the uncertainty, tired of being treated like an option.

But as Carlos drove you both back to his apartment, you felt a flicker of something deep inside— a stubborn resolve to protect your heart, even if it meant walking away from him but the need to not let whatever you had of him leave.

So you kept your mouth shut, glad that he didn’t drive to your place to drop you off. That he was still taking you back to his. You deserved more, but maybe, just maybe, tomorrow.

CHARLES LECLERC

“knee deep in the passenger seat, and you're eating me out. is it casual now?”

The warm glow of the restaurant enveloped you as you sat across from Charles, the flickering candlelight casting playful shadows on his handsome face. You were supposed to be enjoying a nice dinner, but the tension crackling between you two had already shifted the mood.

It started innocently enough—Charles's playful banter and the way his eyes sparkled when he laughed made your heart race. But as the night wore on, it took a sharp turn when the waiter, a tall guy with an easy smile, casually slipped his number on a napkin and handed it to you. You could feel the weight of Charles’s gaze burn into you, his expression a mix of surprise and annoyance.

“Seriously?” he huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “What’s that about?”

You rolled your eyes, a smirk dancing on your lips. “’s just a number, Charles. Chill out.”

But he wasn’t chilling out, far from it. “Yeah, right. Like you’d really call him,” he muttered, his voice tight. You could see the jealousy simmering beneath his cool exterior, and a part of you enjoyed it—a small thrill surged through you knowing he cared.

“Relax. It’s harmless,” you replied, but he cut you off, leaning in closer as he spoke over your explanation, his tone sharp. “It’s not harmless when he’s acting like you’re available.”

You took a sip of your drink, trying to mask your amusement. His jealousy was almost cute, and you couldn’t help the flutters all over your body, knowing you could get a reaction out of him. But the moment was fleeting, as he suddenly stood up and grabbed your hand, his grip firm but urgent.

“Let’s get out of here,” he declared, pulling you towards the exit before you could protest. The restaurant faded into the background as he led you outside, his body radiating heat and tension.

Once you reached the car, he didn’t waste a moment. He pushed you into the backseat, his lips crashing against yours with a desperate intensity. The world outside disappeared as you got lost in the way he kissed you, each movement igniting the familiar fire between you.

“Ruined my mood, baby,” he murmured against your lips, his breath hot and heavy. You could feel the pulse of adrenaline coursing through your veins, the thrill of being caught up in this reckless moment. “Make it up to me now.”

Your vigorous nods made him smirk. But just as you were losing yourself in the heat of it all, Charles shifted his focus. He slid down, his mouth trailing down your body, kissing a path along your thighs, a gasp leaving your lips. 

He made quick work of your clothes before spanking your poor clit, gathering the click. “So wet already, dirty girl.” You moaned softly, arching your back against the seat, your fingers tangling in his hair as he worked his magic.

Yet, amidst the bliss, a flicker of something gnawed at you. He was grumbling under his breath, murmuring words that didn’t quite register at first. “Hope he sees me in between your legs” he muttered, and your heart skipped a beat, a chuckle about to leave your lips.

Suddenly, our foot made contact with Charles- painfully hard- crotch over the clothes and he threw his head back. Nothing could ruin this moment, or so you thought because then you heard it… he name of another girl, whispered low and almost too soft to catch. “Ella…”

Your world shattered in an instant. All the pleasure, all the excitement, evaporated like steam on glass. The warmth that had enveloped you turned cold, leaving you in a frozen moment of realization. Your heart sank as a wave of betrayal washed over you, crashing down with a force that took your breath away.

The name echoed in your mind, each syllable twisting like a knife. All those moments spent in his arms, all the laughter and shared secrets, felt meaningless in the wake of those four letters. The joy you had felt moments ago was replaced with a deep, gnawing pain.

But instead of pushing him away, you took a deep breath, fighting against the urge to crumble. Don’t let it show. Just ignore it for your sake.

“Charles,” you said, forcing a smile that didn’t reach your eyes. You were still here, still caught up in this mess. “Focus on me, okay?”

He looked up, his expression hazy for a moment, the desire in his eyes flickering back to life as he nodded. You didn’t want to show him how much that name hurt. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he had gotten under your skin.

So you pushed the hurt aside, letting the pleasure wash over you again. You gripped his hair tighter, pulling him back to you, trying to ignore the bitterness in your throat. “Just… just forget about it,” you murmured, your voice barely a whisper.

His lips returned to lips, and for a moment, the world around you faded away once more. You let him kiss you deeply, your heart racing with conflicting emotions. You were here, and he was here with you, and that had to count for something, right?

The tension still lingered, the reminder of ‘Ella,’ echoing in the back of your mind, but you buried it deep, clinging to the heat and the pleasure as if it could erase everything else. You were determined to enjoy this moment, even if it was tainted with uncertainty.

As he moved against you, the line between pleasure and pain blurred, and you surrendered to the chaos of it all. You could be casual, you could be carefree—even if it meant pretending everything was fine when deep down, you knew it was anything but.

LANDO NORRIS

“it’s hard being casual when my favorite bra lives in your dresser.”

The dim light from the early morning filtered through the curtains, casting a soft glow across the room. You lay in Lando’s bed, your head resting on the pillow just inches from his, his arm draped lazily over your body. His breathing was slow and steady, completely at peace. He was asleep, unbothered, while your heart raced, your mind spinning in a thousand directions.

You chose to stare up at the ceiling instead, feeling the emotional high from earlier fading away into something much darker. The night had been passionate, the kind of heat between you two that made you forget, for just a moment, that this wasn’t real. But now, as his warmth settled into the sheets, you were wide awake, the weight of reality crashing down on you.

This isn’t love. The thought hit you like a brick to the chest. The warmth of his arm around you, the way his body curled protectively against yours—it all felt so right, so intimate, but deep down, you knew better. This wasn’t love. This was just another night. For him.

You rolled away from him slowly, the ache in your chest growing unbearable as you slipped out from under his arm. The cool air of the room hit your skin, sending a shiver down your spine. You sat up, your legs dangling off the edge of the bed, staring at the floor, your hands trembling as you fought the urge to scream. Why do I keep doing this to myself?

You hated yourself for feeling used, for staying, even when you knew he didn’t feel the same. Every time you come back, you let yourself believe—just for a second—that maybe this time it would be different. Maybe this time, you would wake up in his arms, and he’d look at you with something more than lust in his eyes.

But that moment never came, it never wil…

Tears stung at the back of your eyes, but you blinked them away, refusing to cry over this again. You needed to leave. Before he woke up, before he could see the mess inside your head, before you made a fool of yourself once more.

As you quietly gathered your clothes, something caught your eye. There, hanging out of his open closet door, was your favorite bra—the black lace one you thought you’d lost weeks ago. Your chest tightened, a strange mix of relief and unease washing over you. You stepped closer, reaching for it, but as your fingers brushed the delicate fabric, you froze.

There was another bra in there. One that wasn’t yours. Kept in his personal space like a fucking trophy.

The jealousy hit you like a lightning strike, scorching its way through your veins. Your stomach churned, your head spinning with the sudden, overwhelming wave of emotion. It wasn’t just the bra—it was everything. The confirmation that you weren’t the only one. That you were just another girl who left pieces of herself behind in his apartment.

Your hands shook as you stared at the unfamiliar piece of clothing, your mind racing with images of Lando, here in this bed, with someone else. All the nights you weren’t with him. All the mornings he woke up with her instead.

Why did you expect anything different? You knew what this was, didn’t you? You were supposed to be casual, nothing serious, just two people having fun. But seeing that other bra, knowing it didn’t belong to you- it shattered whatever illusion you had been holding onto.

Oh God.

Your heart pounded in your chest, and before you could stop yourself, you were scrambling back to the bed, desperate to be close to him again. You slid under the covers, pressing your body against his, your hand resting on his chest as if that could make everything feel okay. He stirred slightly, his arm instinctively pulling you back against him, his lips brushing your forehead in a sleepy kiss.

For a moment, you let yourself melt into his touch, pretending that you could belong here, that he could be yours.

But deep down, you knew the truth. You could only have him if you played the part—if you pretended to be okay with being casual. If you could be the girl who didn’t ask for more, who didn’t get jealous, who didn’t care if there was another bra in his closet.

As his breathing evened out again, you closed your eyes, willing yourself to believe that maybe this could be enough. That as long as you stayed, as long as you kept pretending, he could be yours. Even if it was only for moments like this.

Even if it was nothing more than a lie you told yourself.

Because being his- even in this twisted, half-real way- felt better than being without him.

And if playing the part of the dumb lover was the price you had to pay, you would. For as long as you could bear it.

( writing masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request ) ©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

A/N: HIIII omg first ficcc ever! i was looking for a fic inspired by sleep patterns by merchant ships and couldn’t find any, so i decided to write it myself! as this is my first fic don't expect much and don't expect correct grammar. the storyline definitely won’t follow the song perfectly but anywho enjoyyyy!

ps: lyrics will be edited to fit the narrative

MV1 x fem driver!reader

TW: death, nightmares SO SO SO much angst

song lyrics will look like this

559 words

as we sit on the hood of his car, the sun goes down and he asks me what I want out of my life. I tell him I don't know

you stare out at the sunset as the two of you sit on the hood of his car. "what do you want out of life? like after we retire, what are you gonna do?" he asks me as I stare. "i'm not sure max, I'm not sure I know what life even is yet" you say as you turn to him. "whatever it is I'm sure it'll be great as long as we have each other" he smiles taking your hand and pressing a gentle kiss to your palm. "I hope so max, I really hope so" you whisper.

I don't tell him about the dream I had the night before Where I'm driving my car and I swerve off the track and hit a barrier I fly out of my car and hit the edge of a fence Dislocating my jaw and flipping me into a wall Where my neck is broken, and my skull is fractured I bleed to death in excruciating pain

max wakes up to you tossing and turning in the middle of the night, you’re covered in sweat in and crying as you whisper "no, no" over and over again. "baby, babe wake up, c'mon wake up" he gently shakes you and brings you into his arms as you wake up with sobs. "what happened liefje?' he asks with concern as he holds you tightly kissing the top of your head and lightly stroking your back. you just sob shaking your head as he tries to calm you down. eventually you fall asleep in his arms as he stays awake, worried about you.

i will have this dream periodically I will set these events in motion and I will die but today in the warm light of the sunset I don't see it, I just see the sunset

you have been unusually clingy with max (not that he's complaining). you sit on 'max lap as he streams. "why so affectionate baby?" max asks with a chuckle "just love you s'all" you mumble, nuzzling into his neck. "love you to liefje" he smiles as the two of you bask in the dying sunlight as he streams.

I smile back and shake my head I have absolutely no idea, I am afraid.

everything was falling into place, it was like a strange constant feeling of deja-vu. you really didn't want to get in the car but what were you risking your career for? an uncertain feeling? with hesitation you kissed max lightly before you both stepped into your cars. with tears in your eyes, you drove until the inevitable happened, your tyre had caught some debris sending you spinning and flipping into the middle of the track, not being able to stop fast enough a mclaren hits you sending you flying and barrel rolling into the air. somehow the hit you received had made it possible for you to fly out of your car hitting the top of the barrier fence and falling to the and finally hitting the barrier leaving you resting motionless on the gravel. everyone knew, knew that there was no way you had survived that. max sobbed into his helmet as he tried to get out of his car and run to you. the crowd was silent and crofty's commentary couldn't be heard. max reached your body and he pulled both of your helmets off and sobbed as he held your body. his love was gone and he couldn't bring you back. he sobbed and sobbed cradling your face in his hands. max never knew what your nightmares were truly about, and he would never be able to find out. he would never feel your touch or hear your voice again. you were dead.

ahh I hope you enjoyed this!

Hi how are you? Could you write a oneshot about the first time the reader sees negative comments about her in social media and charles comforts her?

Thank u

The sun was high above the circuit as Y/N stood at the edge of the grandstand, her heart racing with excitement. After months of supporting Charles Leclerc from the shadows, she was about to witness her first paddock appearance as his girlfriend. They had deliberately kept their relationship private, wanting to cherish their connection away from the public eye.

As she watched the cars zoom past during the free practice session, Y/N's attention shifted to her phone buzzing in her pocket. Curiosity piqued, she took it out and unlocked the screen, only to be met with a barrage of negative comments on social media. Her eyes widened in shock and disbelief as she read hurtful words about her appearance and her worth compared to Charles. Tears welled up in her eyes, threatening to spill over.

Feeling a hand on her shoulder, Y/N turned to see Joris, Charles' best friend, and Andrea, his trainer, standing beside her. They noticed her distressed state and exchanged concerned glances before Joris spoke up.

"Hey, Y/N, are you okay?" Joris asked, his voice laced with worry.

Trembling, Y/N showed them her phone, tears streaming down her face. "People are criticizing my looks and saying Charles could be with someone richer and prettier"

"Hey, don't pay attention to those ignorant comments. They don't know anything about you or what you mean to Charles. You're beautiful, inside and out." Joris tells her

Andrea frowned, his eyes scanning the hateful comments. "These people are just jealous and bitter. They don't know you like we do."

Andrea nodded, his voice filled with empathy. "It's easy for people to hide behind the anonymity of the internet and say hurtful things. But don't let their words define you. You're strong, Y/N, and you deserve happiness just as much as anyone else."

Y/N sniffled, feeling a glimmer of hope in their words. She wiped away her tears and took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. "Thank you, both of you. I needed to hear that."

Andrea offered her a warm smile. "Remember, there will always be critics, but you have Charles by your side. Lean on him for support."

Joris wrapped an arm around Y/N, guiding her gently. "Come on, let's head to the hospitality area. Charles will be worried about you."

With their comforting presence, Y/N found the strength to move forward. Joris and Andrea helped her navigate through the bustling paddock until they reached the hospitality area

As they get back to the garage, Joris discreetly found Charles and informed him of the situation, reaching Charles' small room in the garage, Joris knocked lightly on the door, his voice carrying a note of urgency. "Charles, it's Joris. I need to talk to you about something important."

A moment later, the door swung open, revealing Charles with a furrowed brow. His eyes met yours, instantly recognizing the lingering traces of pain on your face. Without a word, he pulled you into his arms, enveloping you in a comforting embrace.

Joris spoke up, his voice filled with concern. "Yn read some hurtful comments online, Charles. It really shook her, but she's determined to rise above it all."

In the hospitality room, Y/N sat on the edge of the bed, her face buried in her hands. She was startled when the door opened, and Charles rushed in, concern etched on his face. His eyes softened when he saw Y/N's tear-stained cheeks.

"Mon amour," Charles murmured, using one of his favorite French pet names for her. He closed the door behind him and approached her, his arms enveloping her in a comforting embrace. "What happened? Why are you crying?"

Y/N's voice quivered as she recounted the hurtful comments she had read. "I... I saw all these comments about me. About us. About how I'm not good enough for you."

Charles tilted her chin up, his gaze filled with sincerity. "Y/N, never doubt how much you mean to me. You are the most beautiful person I know, both inside and out. I don't care about what others say. I love you for who you are."

Y/N looked into his eyes, finding solace in his words. She clung to him, feeling the warmth of his embrace grounding her. "But what if they're right? What if I'm not good enough for you?"

Charles shook his head, his thumb brushing away her tears. "You are more than enough. You are perfect to me. I fell in love with your spirit, your kindness, and your ability to light up a room with your smile. Please, don't ever doubt that."

He pressed a tender kiss to her forehead. "Let's not allow their words to overshadow our happiness. We'll face this together, stronger than ever."

In that moment, Y/N realized that she was not alone. Charles' unwavering support and love were the shield she needed against the negativity that often accompanied fame.

"I love you, Charles," she whispered, her voice laced with vulnerability.

Charles pressed his forehead against hers, their breaths mingling. "Je t'aime aussi, mon amour. Never forget that."

Charles and Y/N emerged from the room, hand in hand. The paddock buzzed with activity, but their focus remained on each other. Charles glanced at Joris and Andrea, gratitude shining in his eyes, before leading Y/N towards the awaiting Ferrari team.

He embraced her once more, whispering words of encouragement. "Ignore the haters, mon trésor. We have each other, and that's all that matters."

With renewed strength, they faced the world together, ready to tackle any obstacle that came their way. The negative comments may have stung, but they were no match for the unyielding bond between Y/N and Charles.

SHE LOVES CONTROL — teaser.

summary — being a woman is difficult.what about being a woman who is pursuing a career in motorsports? you would be met with pandemonium.that was the story of her life.always having to fight for a place among the big leagues ; in this case the men just to prove she belonged in the sport.

her last name didn’t help her much either.the world would continue to bark and bite away at her confidence — even more so if they knew of her family ties.that was the reason why she chose to race under a different name,everyone would respect her so called “underdog” story after all.

the drivers were….alright to say the least.she knew of their prying eyes and judging stares when she had first made her appearance on the grid.thankfully,there were a few diamonds in the rough to help her out.for now,she just needed to prove herself to everyone ; quench her hunger for victory.this was going to be a wild season..

pairing — f1 22-23 grid x fem driver!reader,love interest tbd

release date — tba!

hi everyone!! this is my first piece of writing for f1 👩🏻‍💻 i have been keeping this in the drafts for a while,lmk if u want to be on the taglist!