Febuwhumpday27 - Tumblr Posts

Always

It was rare that you used the spare key Matt had given you all those months ago, in fact you could count the number of times you’d had to use it on one hand and all of them had to do with your boyfriend’s secret identity. It was the same reason as to why you were using after countless calls gone unanswered and news sources reported that Daredevil had been seen attempting to rescue children from a human trafficking ring but it had turned nasty leaving no survivors.

Your blood turned cold as you listened to the news and you called Matt more times than you could count before sighing and shoving your shoes on, making your way over to his apartment.

You were quiet as you entered the apartment, not wanting to wake him up if he had managed to fall asleep. You’d watched him over the last few days, watched as his movements became sluggish and it took a few calls of his name before his attentioned settled onto whoever was trying to talk to him.

As you stepped further into the apartment you frowned as you stayed the Daredevil suit discarded on the floor, obviously ripped off hastily like Matt couldn’t stand to be in it a second longer than he had to be. You walked over to it, picking it up and noticed the blood staining certain parts of it before you lay it over the back of the couch and listened.

You heard the sound of the shower running but under it you heard something else, something that sounded like…Matt was crying.

Your eyes widened as you walked over to stand in the doorway of the bathroom, the door had been left open slightly and you listened to the cries became louder frowning to yourself as you decided whether Matt would want you here or not but decided to throw caution to the wind as you walked further into the room.

You could see Matt’s head resting against the wall as water ran down his body, mixing with blood to turn the water red. His whole body looked tense as you used his arms to prop himself up against the wall and you could just about see tremors running through them, causing his shoulder blades to twitch.

Your frown turned into a sad smile as you slipped out of your shoes before you pulled your clothes off, not wanting to get them wet and knowing that afterwards you could slip into one of Matt’s shirts. It was a testament to just how tired he was when he didn’t acknowledge any of the small sounds you made, startling as your fingers brushed against his shoulder before you wrapped your arms around him, hugging him tightly from behind.

“It’s not your fault.” You told him, the words muffled as they were spoke into his back but clear enough that he heard them, his body something going more tense that it had been before a sobbed brokenly made its way past his lips and you felt your heart ache, hating that you could do nothing but try to hold the man together as he fell a part.

Tears were washed away by the water pouring from the shower head and you didn’t know how long you stood there listening to Matt’s cries. They were the kind of cries that made anybody who heard them want to fall apart, filled with the heavy burden of the weight he carried, the impossible situations he found himself in. They were the kind of cries that went straight to your heart and you wanted to do anything you could to fix the situation, to take it away, take those cries away.

But you couldn’t, all you could do was be there for the man as he broke down, cursing and blaming himself as he ran through scenarios about how things could have been different, how if he made a different move here or there then those children would still be alive.

Matt didn’t consciously turned around but he found himself twisting around and burying his head in your shoulder and you didn’t hesitate as you brought your hand up to run it comfortingly through wet hair, keeping up your steady stream of reassurance, promising that he wasn’t to blame for the events of the night.

Matt listened to your voice letting it wash over him and soothe him without registering the words you were saying, he knew you were wrong, he could see every scenario where things could have been different but he also knew it was too late to go over what ifs.

“C’mon, let’s get you to bed.” You said softly once the water started turning cold, shutting it off and gently guiding Matt out of the shower, holding a towel out to him before drying him off yourself when he didn’t move.

You wrapped your arm in his and walked out of the bathroom, guiding him into the bedroom and sitting him down on the bed before making your way over to the closest and pulling out two pairs of underwear and a shirt for you to wear.

You made quick work of putting his clothes on yourself before you walked over to him, smiling as he held his hand out and got dressed.

“Lay down,” You ordered softly, pulling the blanket back and smiling sadly as he climbed in without a word. “Can I get you anything?” You asked him, watching as he shook his head before tugging the blanket down and gestured for you to lay down with him.

You quickly shifted and did as he asked, smiling into his chest as he wrapped his arms around you and held you tightly against him. From the close you could hear his breathing, it was still shuddering and sounded like he was forcing tears down.

You let your fingers trace meaningless shapes against his stomach, avoiding the cuts that he had patched up and felt the tension begin to slowly ease from him as he relaxed enough to start to fall into a light sleep.

“Thank you for being here,” He murmured, pressing a lingering kiss to your head before he let himself give into sleep.

“Always, Matt.” You promised the sleeping man, determined to keep it as you cuddled closer to him, hating that he put so much pressure on himself, focusing solely on the bad things he could prevent rather than all the good things he did. You knew it was your job to remind him of those times when things got bad. “Always.”

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