'i'm A Good Guy' Has Got Me In Tears - Tumblr Posts
Sexcapade
Your neighbour has a series of unfortunate sex-related mishaps, and he keeps asking for your help.
Pairing: Jimin x F! reader
Rating: 18+ (but SFW)
Genre: Non-idol AU, fluff, crack
Word count: 1.9k
Warnings: Swearing, mentions of sex toys
You’re half-asleep when you open the door to your apartment, but even if you’d been fully awake, you would still have struggled to put the pieces together.
There’s a quite attractive man in a baggy white sweatshirt smiling at you, hands shoved in his pockets.
‘I’m Jimin, your neighbour,’ he says.
You’re already automatically introducing yourself in turn, saying what a pleasure it is to meet him.
You blame your years in boarding school.
‘I was wondering if you might be able to help me,’ Jimin says.
You watch, incredulous, as he lifts his right hand out of his pocket, revealing the silver handcuffs dangling from his wrist.
‘Just got out of custody?’ you ask.
‘It was a sex thing,’ Jimin replies smoothly.
‘Why can’t your partner undo you?’
‘I was alone.’
Now you’re fully awake.
You look at each other for what seems like a full minute. The man doesn’t even have the decency to blush.
Then you nod. ‘Sure.’
You get Jimin to wait on your couch whilst you grab a paper clip from your desk.
‘Where are the keys?’ you ask, as you start to jimmy the catch.
‘I have no idea,’ Jimin says. He holds out his arm to help you, and you notice that he has quite nice wrists. They’re veiny, warm, and there’s strength in his grip. A thin gold chain dangles from the wrist you’re holding.
You cry out in triumph as the handcuff clicks open, freeing Jimin.
Jimin rubs his wrist gingerly. ‘You look like you’ve done that before.’
‘Seems a bold statement to make given we don’t know each other,’ you say pertly.
Jimin nods. ‘Thanks for freeing me.’
You wave him off with a flourish. ‘Anytime.’
You reconsider. ‘Wait – not anytime!’ you call out after him.
Jimin’s only response is to laugh as he heads for your door.
Annoyingly, his laugh is as pretty as the rest of him.
***
You’re in the middle of a virtual meeting when the sounds start filtering in from next door.
You’re on mute, but you have to give a presentation in the next twenty minutes, and the noises coming through are definitely inappropriate for your team meeting.
You close your window in the hope of keeping out the sound whilst you debate what to do.
You’re new to the team, and you’re trying to make a name for yourself.
Preferably not as that person who had porn playing in the background during her presentation.
You excuse yourself and head next door.
It’s a wonder your neighbour can hear you knocking over the out-and-out shrieking.
Jimin opens the door, running a hand through his blond hair. He looks remarkably composed, given the context. His shirt is unbuttoned, untucked.
His chest and torso are beautiful, but that’s not the point.
‘I’ve got to do a presentation in the next twenty minutes. I don’t want to be known as the porn girl,’ you say, brisk.
Jimin nods. ‘I’m sorry. I’ll turn it down.’
‘Just for an hour,’ you say.
You marvel at how blatant he is, how he isn’t showing even an ounce of contrition that the entire building is aware he’s watching porn in the middle of the afternoon.
You wonder what he does for a living.
Jimin raises an eyebrow at you. ‘Sorry. Anything else I can do for you?’ he asks.
There’s a smile playing on his lips, a hint of flirtatiousness in his tone.
You don’t have time for this.
‘No, that’s it, thanks,’ you say, briskly. You head back to your apartment and bolt the door.
***
It’s been a hell of a day at work. You’re pouring yourself a glass of wine, flicking through the options on Netflix when there’s a knock at your door.
You run to the door, and it’s only when the door opens and you see Jimin standing on the other side that you realise it’s too quick for it to be the pizza you ordered.
Jimin’s holding a dishcloth to his forehead.
‘I’m sorry to ask again, but can you help me?’
He’s about to lift the dishcloth off then he stops and looks at you, assessing.
‘Are you squeamish?’
‘Fuck,’ you reply, fuelled by wine. ‘Is there brain under there?’
‘No, just a cut I think, I can’t see it properly.’
You take another gulp of your wine, then pass it to Jimin.
Jimin takes a long swig. ‘Ready?’
‘You should sit down in case you pass out,’ you say, sensible.
Jimin eyes you. ‘We should both sit down.’
‘Hey, buddy, you came to me to help,’ you remind him.
You end up sitting across from each other on the couch.
Jimin lifts off the dishcloth.
You stare, unimpressed, at the long thin shallow slash above his left eyebrow.
‘Is that it?’
Jimin looks at you in disbelief. ‘There was a lot of blood.’
‘I wouldn’t even put a bandaid on that,’ you say, dismissive.
‘It’s my face!’ says Jimin.
He’s still clutching your wine, so you pour yourself another glass.
‘It’ll heal before you know it,’ you say.
There’s another knock at the door, so you open it.
Thank god, it’s your pizza and not another neighbour with a sex-related injury.
‘How’d you cut it?’ you ask, setting your pizza down.
‘Flogger,’ Jimin mumbles.
You shudder. ‘Did someone hurt you, Jimin?’
‘I needed to see it in motion,’ Jimin says.
You don’t want to ask any other questions.
‘Pizza?’ you offer, out of politeness.
‘Sure,’ Jimin says, settling in on your couch like he belongs there. ‘Can I get more wine too?’
***
Three glasses of wine in, you’ve learned a few more things about your neighbour Jimin. Firstly, that his surname is Park and he’s from a city not far from yours.
Secondly, that he’s a photographer for a high-end sex toy company.
It explains all the sex toys he’s been playing around with.
It doesn’t explain his very loud and very obtrusive afternoon porn-fest from the other afternoon, but you’re not sure you want to go there.
Thirdly, that he’s funny.
At first you were laughing at him, but now you realise that he’s making you laugh. You like it.
‘I’ve got a model coming in tomorrow for a shoot,’ Jimin tells you.
‘Don’t you have a studio for that?’ you ask. You don’t really care, you’re out all day tomorrow anyway, but you’re curious.
‘It’s a friend, he says he’d be more comfortable at mine,’ Jimin shrugs.
You finish off the last of your wine. ‘Sure. I’ll get my first aid kit ready. And my lock-picking paperclip.’
Jimin looks affronted at your tone. ‘These accidents could happen to anyone. You never said how you got so good at unlocking handcuffs.’
‘We don’t know each other well enough for that yet,’ you mutter.
Jimin’s tone goes silky. ‘I found the keys.’
You laugh. ‘Get out of my apartment, Jimin. I have a long day tomorrow.’
***
You peer around the corner of your landing. The coast appears to be clear.
You’re unlocking the door, pushing it open, when Jimin’s door opens.
‘Y/N!’ he calls. ‘We need your help.’
‘Just call an ambulance,’ you call back.
Jimin rushes to you and grabs your arm. ‘Please.’
For the umpteenth time since you met him, you wonder why God saw fit to put such a hot mess inside such a beautiful package.
‘What do you –’
The words die on your lips when you enter Jimin’s apartment.
In front of you, a white sheet carelessly draped low, low over his hips, is an insanely hot man.
Your mouth goes dry as you take in his curly dark hair, the light sheen on his skin, the tattoos on his right arm, his beautiful body.
He sits up when he sees you, and the sheet slides even lower.
You’re transfixed.
‘Y/N!’ Jimin says, and you snap to attention.
You turn your back on the hot man to look at Jimin.
‘I need your feet,’ Jimin tells you.
You wait, both for him to finish what he’s saying and for your composure to come back. You can hear the rustling of sheets behind you.
‘Explain, Park Jimin,’ you prompt when Jimin looks like he’s just going to keep staring at you.
‘Your feet. Can you pose with JK?’
‘No! I just got back from work. I can’t pose.’
‘You have great feet,’ Jimin coaxes.
There’s throat clearing from behind you. ‘I’m JK.’
‘Are you decent?’ you snap.
‘I’m a good guy,’ he says, sounding hurt.
‘Are you wearing clothes,’ you clarify.
You hear the snap of an elastic band. ‘I am now.’
You turn around and shake the hand JK’s holding out. His briefs are tiny, you guess he has a loose definition of ‘dressed’. You think he probably gets away with it because of the way he looks.
‘I’ll pay you,’ Jimin says.
‘I’m not a model, Jimin.’
‘I’ll get you dinner after the shoot.’
Now you’re intrigued.
‘What do I need to do?’
***
JK, or Jungkook as his name turns out to be, looks at you over the grill. He hasn’t stopped eating since you got to the restaurant. You wonder where the hell he’s putting it.
You swipe the last cooked strip of beef before he can take it.
Jimin obligingly lays out more strips of raw beef to cook.
‘I think these pictures are going to turn out amazing,’ he says. ‘Thanks for your help, Y/N.’
‘Anytime,’ you say wearily.
‘Yeah, I’d be happy to work with you again,’ Jungkook tells you. He seems sincere. He looks different fully dressed, more of a casual college kid than a Greek god. You think maybe it’s his wide eyes and slightly sticky out teeth. Or maybe it’s the smear of sauce across his cheek from the ribs.
‘Um, thanks?’ you say doubtfully.
You’re still trying to get over having had your feet in his naked lap for the last hour.
Jimin beams at you. ‘You’re a natural.’
‘To our new working relationship,’ Jungkook says, smiling at you, raising his glass.
‘I’ll cheers to that but I think I’m sticking to my day job,’ you say, hastily.
Jimin laughs. ‘You’re difficult to rattle.’
‘Have you been trying to rattle me?’ you ask.
Jimin just smiles.
‘If you knew anything about me, you’d know that sex isn’t the way to rattle me,’ you say, rolling your eyes.
Jimin looks at you thoughtfully.
***
You groan as you drag yourself out of bed to answer the door.
‘This better be good, Park,’ you say, rubbing your eyes. ‘It’s the crack of dawn.’
Park Jimin’s standing on your doorstep, holding out a small bunch of posies and a cup of coffee to you.
He’s beautifully dressed, fresh as the flowers he’s holding.
He smells amazing.
You’re rattled.
You blink at him.
‘What the hell is this?’ you ask.
‘This is me asking you out,’ he tells you.
You blink again, wondering if you’re dreaming.
‘You’re beautiful, you’re funny, and you take things in your stride,’ Jimin says. ‘Can I take you to dinner?’
‘Are you serious?’ you ask.
He smiles at you, charming, sexy, and you’re smiling back.
‘So will you let me take you out?’ Jimin asks.
You sniff the flowers he’s pressed into your hands. They smell like spring, like new beginnings.
You smile. 'Maybe I can show you how to use handcuffs properly,' you say.
Jimin smiles back. ‘I’ll be back tonight to pick you up for dinner, then I think I'd like to take you up on that.’
You laugh, and Jimin walks away, his own silvery laughter echoing down your hallway.
©hamsterclaw 2022