Jayjay's Textdump - Tumblr Posts
Today, that one "VeRy BaDaSs" girl called me a "not-enough-woman".
Well, if in my country I couldn't be arrested for that, I would probably shout at her YEAH I'M A TRANSMASC, NOW WHAT??? SUCK IT UP AND SHUT UP, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!11!1!!!1
but I can't. because I live in a country where lgbtquia+ is a nono move. and I don't wanna get bailed for my gender yet.
[P.S. Dear FBR, please don't arrest me for saying that-]
And yeah, before you're gonna tell me that I should just move from this country, WELL I CAN'T DO THAT YET, I DON'T HAVE CASH OR STABLE JOB FOR THAT YET, SO MOVING AWAY IS A NONO RIGHT NOW. If I had those guaranteed, then I would 100% move already despite everything, lol. But rn I need to get a degree and at least some savings.
Ughhheaaurrghh it's hard to be trans when you're in a country where it's thought to be wrong or considered as a mental sickness pls let me just exist without constantly deadnaming and mispronouncing myself just to fit into your world view
Yesterday, in the evening I had a fever and it lasted till night, and I think I've got a little too silly yesterday, so I wrote something weird... Eh...
Imma translate that for you guys (the original text is on Russian)
I translated that for you and fixed some typos
vvv
IIII KNOOOOWW WHAT'S THE PROOOBLEEEM
F__k I forgot
Wait
Did I forgot, or forget?
F__k who am i
What's the point of life???
I had a dream about that somewho asked someone something
I looked at him and realized that his face looked like a f__king plate
Then I ran away from there, catching butterflies, and suddenly I ran into Luntik and he says "F__k, wanna play poker?"
I agree, we pull out chess and start playing football (I won and after it Luntik fell onto atoms and flied into Kyrgyzstan)
Then I look at the clock and realize that it's already 50 of the morning, and that I need to go to school, so I quickly pick up my switch-plug and jump out of the window, but Vernam catches me, because he was running away from my skibidi-classmate
Welp that's sure a weird dream tho I don't f__king understand even a thing
F__k where's slippers
Am I dreaming???
I sleep with open eyes???
WHY WALLS BREATHE HEAVIER THAN NORMALLY
WHERE AM I
WHY IS IT COLD
XzxzxxxxXxzxZZZxxxxXxXXXXXxxxxzxxXxXxzXXXXXxx
^^^ that was the text I wrote while having a fever.
All I'm just gonna say... WHAT. THE. HELL.
Guys, I'm just wondering... Is it even real to befriend Viprin? I just see y'all getting along with him, and I'm just like... HOW??? ARE U GUYS ESCAPED FROM HOGWARTS OR WHAT??? Gimme tips. I wanna be a viprin befriender N.1 too. ( –ω-)
AAAAAAAAAA HELP SOS HELP111!!!1!!1!
Im getting into another class and there's LOTS OF PPL WHO HATED ME IN PAST A LOT sooo I NEED A GUIDE HOW TO BECOME A NORMIE!1!1!!11
It's starting on Monday so I NEED HELP Y'ALL—
Is there any guide or something about dis???
I would DEFINITELY like to see em' all.
Imma gonna vent here hehe
Y'know how it hurts to choose between your found family and your beloved partner?
WELL, I CAN'T CHOOSE BETWEEN THEM.
I CAN'T. I JUST CAN'T.
I'D RATHER SACRIFICE MY OWN LIFE AND DREAM TO BECOME A MAN THAN CHOOSING BETWEEN MY LOVED ONES.
For context:
My partner wants to fly to Serbia and live here with me, and they said that they can't stay in Saint Petersburg, where my found family lives because my partner had some conflicts with certain person from my found family.
I don't want to abandon any of them and I just can't choose.
Any tips on how to deal with this sh1t???
And WIBTA, if I sacrifice all of them and delete all my social media so they can't find me anywhere and can't push me for that decision? (Yes, I do have that thought in mind rn, and I WISH I DIDN'T.)
UPD: Yes, we did break up. Yes, I've chosen my found family. I don't want someone to manipulate me into dumping everyone I feel attached for except for them. IM. NOT. YOUR. TOY. AND. NEVER. WILL. BE.
NEVER force your couple into dumping everyone else just to please your own ego.