Let Me Be Delusional In Peace - Tumblr Posts

3 years ago

Calling out AOT simps.

Hey again, I did this last time with jjk, here's the aot version cause I felt like it, been pretty sick recently and bored out of my mind. This isn't ment to disrespect anyone, everything I say is meant as a joke and not to be taken to heart. I included the characters I already have an opinion on, idk maybe I'll expand the list. Anyways enjoy reading :>

Hange simps: Ok I see y'all, you're valid af, Henge is Hella hot but on a serious note how's your mental health doing? Carrying your friends issues isn't fun, pls take a break, have a cookie and sleep in fuzzy blankets you deserve it. They'd treat you like royalty, I can't roast you, congratulations on your choices. Either just as insanely upbeat as them or very relaxed and you need a person with a very upbeat personality to keep you leveled. 10/10 you're sweethearts and I've never seen an army of simps as hot and with different styles. Casual indie music enjoyer<3

Levi simps: You have attachment issues. There I said it. It's been like what? 9 years since the anime came out and you're still so down bad for this man ever since he baybladed his way into your heart. Most of y'all would drop every anime crush for him, he's top dog for you. Let's face it no one could get him to open up but I don't think you're ready for this conversation. Your family knows about Levi, your friends know about Levi, you're probably never letting him go. For that I'll say you're extremely loyal also you have unrealistic standards in dating. Pretty sure you're great cooks. You have low-key adapted his personality and you're badasses. Also valid 10/10 I think you like chill rnb, idk I can't read y'all.

Mikasa simps: You fell for her cause she's hella strong and gorgeous, she deserves the world and so do you, but for the love of God if I see another word about the unspeakable things you'd do with her menstrural products im coming for your internet connections. I'll skip the obvious need you have for her to beat you up, I love her too I'm down bad for her but I get my daily dose of grass touching, y'all should try it too. I hope you know she hasn't washed her scarf ever since eren gave it to her. 9/10 you need to chill, fucking mappa made us all feral. Dark clothes, You listen to mitski.

Eren simps: Welcome to group therapy, do you want to share something with the circle or shall I go first? :> You have extremely unhealthy habits. No you don't need more caffeine for today, I beg you have a sip of water and some fruit. You don't care if he destroyed everything on earth as long as you got destroyed by him too. You probably read a lot of modern au fics to escape the pain (don't be shy drop your recs in my comments pls, it's a need at this point). If you started the simping campaign in season four you probably simped for Levi before that. You now have a thing for long hair and man buns now. Dog person, alternative look idk I picture y'all with piercings and tattoos. You believe in traumatising people back, who am I to judge? How does it feel to have your entire simp list be villains? If mikasa simps need to touch grass y'all should probably go to a field and start chewing it up, you know what I'm talking about, I won't elaborate. 15/10 if you also simp for his Titan form, bmth enjoyer, if you don't know what music to play you go an Eren Jaeger playlist.

Reiner simps: Who hurt you? I'll just say it, daddy issues. You think you can be a therapist to him, probably give him comfort, you can't I'm sorry. I feel like he'd treat you ok, but please stop going after people who have issues it's not good for you. But I feel you he's so hot and troubled also honkers. You have a thing for big chested anime men, probably also a toji or Nanami simp, dare I say Yami? Can I be honest tho I really like y'all, you're chill and gorgeous with taste, I can ignore the mental health issues too cause this man is something else. 20/10 you give me grunge music vibes.

Armin: Smarty pants, you like control. I low-key think you're a bit crazy in a good way, you seem very calculated but lmao every decision you make is last minute :') you are very well spoken and seemingly calm. He'd treat you great I can't roast you at all, I'm sorry. 10/10 very good choice, let the rest of us burn, dark/light academia aesthetic, I think you get down to some K-pop.

Jean simps: People of culture, you're also cocky like him but not as hot headed. Another man that would give you the world, I also can't roast you, you make better decisions than I ever did in my life. MCU fan. You have a thing for side characters, I think you always like someone other than the MC. You have a thing for hands. 10/10 great street style looks, classic rock enjoyer.

Erwin: Unhealthy, he'd lead you to death just so he could see that basement. He's a crazy bastard, make better choices, you don't deserve to be eaten by titans. You have a thing for authority figures. -100/10 I picture y'all in sundresses and you'd look amazing, you deserve better.


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