Madonna/whore Dichotomy - Tumblr Posts
The idea pushed on women that they have to behave in a certain toned down way to be worthy of marriage isn’t just one that seeks to control women and their self-expression but, as I think about it, creates a ‘need’ for married men to have another outlet for sexuality and disinhibition. Be proper. Not too slutty. Not too funny. Not too anything aside from beautiful and interesting-enough-to-justify-marrying and you’ll be lucky. But 9 out of 10 times your husband won’t be satisfied. He has ‘needs’ right? He wants titillation, sexual adventure, ‘a good time’. Now, I’m not one for pushing ideas of strict monogamy on everyone. But these mentalities are never open or poly ones- its men going behind their wife’s backs, with 0 prior discussion, consent or agreement, to satisfy the ‘needs’ they ahve that their wives don’t supply– because for the most part their wives were specifically told not to. I don’t think this is a bug so much as a function. By grooming women to be less sexually/sensually confident and expressive than they could be, they’re also way more likely to be ‘less’ than their husbands ‘need’ (I say ‘need’ bc like honestly idk dude either you need it enough to talk about, enough to leave her, or you don’t need it that much at all) therefore giving a ‘reason’ (god knows all a person really needs is something they can rationalize) for them to cheat. Surely many women’s attitudes about sex and sexuality can be genuinely theirs but we all know that for the most part we’re indoctrinated from birth. Which is why this ‘need’ for something else that the relationship doesn’t provide is rationalized to suit men, but never women. Because our sexuality doesn’t include needs or tendencies outside of men amirite.
