Mumu Reblogs - Tumblr Posts

I want to stuff this lino in my pocket so no one can harm him😞

in the dark.

pairing: minho x reader genre/warnings: friends to lovers, fluff, angst; kissing, crying, mention of blood, mention of animal abuse, not very edited lol word count: 0.6k note: oh i've had the idea for a scene like this for a whiiiile now and i was hella motivated to finally write it after watching skzflix 😂 (twas supposed to be used for a jk fic but oh well, sorry jungoo)

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

"It was stupid of you."

"Okay."

"And reckless."

"Okay."

"And dangerous."

"Okay."

"And stupid. Did I already mention that? Because it was fucking stupid."

"Oka-"

"Fuck!" you snap. "Why do you keep saying that? Is it the only word in your vocabulary?"

Minho shrugs defeatedly, like none of this matters to him, but his guilty eyes tell you otherwise. He purses his lips for a second, before he tells you, "What else am I supposed to say?"

"Say you're sorry? Say you'll stop doing it? Say you won't put me through this again?"

He stays quiet, and to be honest, you expected him to. He's too stubborn for his own good and he's too good for his own sake. He's got the kindest heart you know, and you will always love him for it, but...

It's hard to make peace with it when he shows up at your doorstep every few weeks with bruises all over, like an abandoned dog asking you to take him in and put him back together.

It's hard to keep track of all the reasons he tells you to justify his borderline foolhardy actions. The last time it happened, it was because he ran into some psycho abusing the stray cats near his neighborhood. Tonight, it was because he saw someone get mugged on the street.

It's even harder to be okay with the fact that he's infinitely selfless and kind because you love your friend.

You love your friend.

You heave a sigh, going back to the task at hand because you know there's no convincing Minho otherwise. Sometimes, you wish he'd think of himself, that he'd put himself over others. Sometimes, you wish he'd think about you.

You asked him about it once, why he kept showing up to yours instead of going to a hospital. Instead of going home.

He only replied, simple and earnest, "I just want to be here with you."

You soak a cotton swab in rubbing alcohol before you press it gently against the cut on his cheek, wincing when he does. Then you move to the cut on the bridge of his nose, the one on his jawline, the one on the corner of his mouth...

You don't meet his eyes, but you feel his steady gaze on you the entire time you tend to his wounds. You're aware of how your hands are shaking, the way every breath you exhale is trembling, and that there are tears ready to overflow any second now.

The first one spills as you work on cleaning the blood off the corner of his mouth.

Then, suddenly, the cotton swab is no longer in your hand. Minho carelessly flings it elsewhere, and before you can scold him for interrupting you, his palms are on your face, delicate fingers cradling your jaw.

You blink. Just a split second, and his lips are on yours.

He's soft, and warm, and sweet, despite the bitterness that's been on your tongue the entire night. You love him. You do.

And he kisses you like he loves you too, tenderly and wholeheartedly.

You want to keep him with you forever, to never let him go, to not have to see him get hurt ever again. You don't think it's possible for you to endure it anymore, now that you know how it feels to have him like this.

When he pulls away, you're dazed. Rightfully so.

Minho doesn't stray from you for too long. He lets you catch your breath before he's leaning in once more.

Another kiss. Three seconds.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles against your lips, his tone so painfully sincere.

Another kiss. Four seconds.

"I'll stop doing it."

Then another one. Five seconds.

"I won't put you through this again."

all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 03.11.2023]

WHAT HAPPENS TMRW!?!?!?!?

talk tomorrow — lee heeseung. best friends to lovers. drunken confessions. fluff. (1.1k words)

It takes a single message from Jay reading “Heeseung drunk. Please help” for you to leave the comfort of your bed in favor of picking up your best friend.

He’d told you the night prior that he’d be drinking out with his friends, even asked you to come with him. However, you were a prisoner to your 10-page essay due at midnight so you’d opted out of his invitation – despite his accompanying doe-eyes, pout, and whining. He had taken everything out of his books of “How To Get (Name) To Say Yes” for you to reconsider, but you’d kept a firm stand on wanting to pass your subject.

Though, at 2am, with your essay—not proofread— passed and sent into the void for you to never look at ever again, you had no choice but to get the boy before he makes stupid decisions that’d have him be subject to his friends’ teasing the next day. If Jay’s one text message hadn’t convinced you, Jake’s drunk phone call with Heeseung mumbling your name over and over again would’ve done the trick.

So, clad in pajamas you had every intent on sleeping in, you’re left walking a few minutes away from his destination until you could smell the familiar scent of hard liquor. It doesn’t take a minute of you announcing you’d arrived before Heeseung barges out of the club doors to stumble his way to you and take you in his arms, just like in the movies, back slouched and head draped on your shoulder.

Though, the movies never described how foul alcohol would smell like on a boy’s sweaty body. It made you freak out, along with the thought of the connotations of a drunken boy who could pull whoever he wanted. Had he met a pretty girl?

Had it been Jake, you wouldn’t have minded. You’d even go as far as saying you’d help him, but Heeseung is a different case. Different in that you’re madly in love with him, and you could only ever see Jake as a brother figure.

“(Name)? Is it actually you?” His words come out in a slur, but you don’t miss the tilt of sudden giddiness in the way that he speaks to you.

“He’s been whining about you all night.” Jay’s voice follows from right behind him, peeling the drunk boy away from you who instantly makes grabby hands and lunges right back when Jay lets go. You could hear Heeseung mumbling, “don’t tell her”, against your shoulder.

“Don’t tell me what?” You try to support Heeseung’s wait on you, looking from him to Jay who simply shrugs his shoulders in response. Jake is a compliant drunk at the back with his eyes curtained and hands behind his back so Jay doesn’t scold him.

“That I like you.” He murmurs, low rasp in his voice and arms tightening around you as if to prepare you for the words you had never expected to hear from the boy. You would’ve stumbled in your step had Heeseung not depended most of his weight on you.

Jake’s mouth drops.

“Oh my god. He actually said it.” You could hear Jake’s harsh whispers that Jay desperately tries to shut down, dragging his friend back into the building despite his attempts at trying to see the scene unfold before him.

The door closes, and it’s just you, Heeseung, and the faint music playing from the club.

“Do you actually mean that?” You ask more to yourself, sudden bomb dropped. Apparently, it does not take seconds to comprehend that the boy you’d been in love with since middle school bears the same feelings for you. So, you stand there looking like an idiot with Heeseung stuck to you like his life depends on it.

“Of course I do.” His head perks up, defensive almost, peeling away from you. “Have you not— have you not noticed the way I look at you? How I have all your favorite books memorized, how I know everything about you by heart? I like you so much, (Name). I like you so much that sometimes it feels like I can’t breathe because what is my heart for if not to love you?”

“Hee—”

“How could anyone not love you? You walk into a room, and everyone is captivated by you. Magic is everywhere with you, and I just want to be able to have even just a fraction of who you are. But I could never tell you that. I’m just… I’m just your best friend, right? How could I be anything more?”

His eyes are glossy, and fixated on your lips before he curses himself. “I’m sorry. Are you mad at me?”

“Hee, of course I’m not mad at you. But, can we talk about this tomorrow? I don’t want you to say things you don’t mean.”

“But I do mean everything, baby. And I’ll—” Hiccup. “I’ll say everything again tomorrow, anything you want for you to believe me.”

“Come on, let’s go home. We’ll talk more about this in the morning, okay?”

“Okay.”

“You’re gonna have a really bad headache tomorrow.”

“Hmm… I heard kisses are a good remedy.”

“Really, now?”

“Mhm.”

His hand dives after yours, walking with you to your apartment minutes away. Your heart flutters in the space between your intertwined fingers. He holds onto you like he knows nothing else. It only makes you smile more.

He’ll settle for handholding tonight.

“Did you have fun tonight?”

“Mmm, couldn’t stop thinking about you though. It’s always more fun with you.” Heeseung doesn’t even think of what he’s saying anymore, spewing unfiltered words he’d normally keep hidden until he was sure you felt the same. Maybe it’s because his mind is too busy reeling what it’d be like to be with you, and how your lips could possibly feel like on his.

“Hee.” You warn light-heartedly.

“Okay, tomorrow, tomorrow. We’ll talk about this tomorrow.” He repeats like a mantra before sighing out. “Want time to hurry. Wanna know if you feel the same way.”

Heeseung looks lost in his own body when you arrive back into your apartment, but he still has everything memorized—where to take his shoes off, where to sit as you hand him a glass of water to drink, where his spare clothes are.

Your chest feels warm the whole time you help him wash his face. He simply sits there, compliant and behaved which is not how he’s like on a day to day basis, as you run your hands through his face, even after you dry him off with a towel. Heeseung is only a boy with a mind thinking if his everydays could look like this.

He falls asleep after 15 minutes, but his hand never leaves yours, and there’s a little note on your bedtime with lines you could barely recognize as Heeseung’s handwriting.

I meant everything. Talk tomorrow.

ok first of all, FUCK YOU TUMBLR! cuz u been giving me all these fluffy fanfics about marriages and raising kids, NOW THIS!

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO COPE WITH THIS!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

stay with me...

group: stray kids !

pairing: idol!lee felix x f!reader

genre: angst with an angsty ending, fluff at the beginning

warnings + additional info: pt 2 of “instant ramen”!, reader is referred to as y/n, established relationships, felix is referred to as lix, and lixie, petnames, pregnancy, miscarriage, post-loss depression, crying, vomiting, death.

authors note: all i can say is sorry. i dont know why exactly i thought of this but im planning on making a pt 3. hopefully this doesnt break your heart :( ending was a bit rushed bc i didnt feel like crying anymore :( this is also not proofread. english is not my first language, so please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. happy reading :)

wc: 2407

HUGE TW, PROCEED WITH CAUTION: miscarriage, pregnancy, blood, and the pain that goes along with it.

“lixieee im home!”

you came home with such a big smile on your face. you were a little grumpy about work, your mood swings not making things any better, and you felt a little sick. nonetheless, you were still excited to come home to your boyfriend.

“hey pretty! i’m making some brownies, just give me a bit yeah? they’ll be done in 20”

you walk over to him, giving him a quick peck on the cheek and thanking him before leaving to your room to go shower. 

throwing off your clothes, you enter the shower rather quickly, hoping that it will refresh you enough. you run the vanilla shampoo through your hair, the feeling of the bubbles running down your back relaxing you. 

all of a sudden, the scent of vanilla hits your nose, an uneasy feeling washing over you. you finish your shower as fast as you can, putting on your clothes and then rushing out the bathroom. maybe you were just hungry?

“hey lix”, you said with a weak smile, sitting down at the table where he was waiting with leftovers from yesterday and his brownies. 

“hey angel, you hungry now?”

“mhm…”

he dumps the food out onto your plates, but you grab a brownie before even looking at the food. felix’s brownies could never get old. you take a bite, the warm fudge practically melting in your mouth.

you enjoyed the brownie, and felix began to pick one up, when suddenly your eyes went wide. the same terrible feeling was back, except stronger now. you tried to fight it by swallowing the part of the brownie that was already in your mouth.

the feeling didn’t leave, and you found yourself scrambling to your feet to stand up. “baby… what’s wrong?”

you couldn’t answer, afraid that the bits of your brownie would end up on him, and instead ran to the kitchen sink. felix made sure to follow behind just as fast. the second you got to the sink, you were letting go. 

felix watched as you vomited out the brownie and the rest of the food you had today, quickly grabbing your hair so it wouldn’t get in the way. his other hand ran soothing circles around your back, hoping to calm you down.

you threw up with such force that bile shot out your nose, felix now becoming even more concerned. once you’ve calmed down and washed your face, felix finally speaks up. “let’s get you to bed baby.”, he sighs lightly.

he quickly picks you up bridal style, setting you down on your bed carefully. you let out a little whine when felix left, but quickly returned with an emergency bucket. “just in case”, he said with a sweet smile.

he brought the hair dryer from the bathroom, not wanting you to get sick from the cold, and quickly blow dried your hair. he didnt work on styling it, wanting you to get rest as soon as possible.

he quickly runs to grab you a jug of warm water to place on your tummy. you loved that he was so attentive to you, especially on days he was back at home. “i love you lix. i’m sorry for what happened”

“it’s not like you could control it dummy, go to sleep now. i love you”

-

that morning, felix woke up to an empty bed. the bucket next to you was filled to the brim with bile, felix instantly darting to the bathroom. his heart broke seeing you on the floor, vomiting into the toilet as you shook violently.

he quickly held your hair back again, rubbing the soft part of your tummy to soothe it. “baby what’s going on? did you eat something?”

you shook your head, not trusting your own words in case vomit came out instead. you’re tired, completely worn out. it feels like all the energy in your body has just left you. 

suddenly, a wave of realization comes over you, and you begin to panic. you’re constantly vomiting. you have terrible mood swings. you didn’t get your period. everything lines up perfectly.

your breaths become labored, soon becoming large gasps for breath. “felix- i…”

he begins to become extremely worried. “what baby? what’s wrong?”

“i…”; you can’t go on. you’re exhausted. it’s the last thing you remember saying before you black out, almost falling into the toilet if felix weren’t holding you back right now. 

“shit- y/n? stay with me okay? i’m calling an ambulance.” 

felix struggled to stay calm, tears running down his face as he tried to stop his voice from quivering. “my girlfriend, she needs help. she’s been vomiting like crazy and- she’s passed out right now”, he said it so fast the dispatcher almost couldn’t understand him.

the ambulance was at your house within minutes, felix holding you in his arms again while he waited. he could still feel your breath fanning over his neck, a sense of comfort washing over him. quickly, you guys took off to the hospital.

“felix?” 

“oh god baby! you’re awake? are you feeling okay?”

your head hurt a little, and you were incredibly confused, but you decided to tell him anyways. it was probably important. “my head hurts a little bit, but that’s okay” 

he holds your hand, clutching tightly, afraid there’s actually something wrong.

the doctor opens the door, sitting on one of the chairs next to where all the machines are hooked up. “okay so, we’ve figured out why you’ve been vomiting so much.”, she pauses.

felix is practically squirming in his seat, afraid for the words about to come out of her mouth. “congratulations, you’re pregnant.”

all of a sudden, his hand lets go, instead using it to slap it over his mouth to conceal his squeals. you jerk your head towards him, afraid of his reaction until you see the tears in his eyes and his bright smile.

you smile back, turning to the doctor who hands you a paper with an article about pregnancy and the symptoms that go along with it. “thank you so much”

“of course, the release forms are at the front desk. call if you need anything. once again, congratulations you two”, she says with a smile.

once she leaves, felix couldn’t hold back, kissing your face practically everywhere. “oh my gosh! y/n!”

you couldn’t help but laugh at his excitement. you were so happy he wasn’t upset or anything. you’ve been wanting to start a family with him for as long as you could remember, but you’re not even married yet. 

suddenly, your thoughts hit you like a boulder. “felix… what about the media. what do we tell everyone” 

he paused for a moment, he didn’t even think about that aspect of it. “i’ll call them. i’ll call management. if they say it’s not acceptable then fuck it. i’ll quit my job. don’t worry about them, please?”

you smile at felix’s dedication for you. you knew he was going to be such an amazing father.

-

“wait seriously?! she’s pregnant?”, changbin giggled excitedly.

“seriously. she’s pregnant!”

felix is at the dorms right now with the boys, and he couldn’t be any happier telling them about it. management was very happy for him and understanding of his situation, but he didn’t want to release it to the media just yet.

it’s nearing your third month now, your exhaustion becoming more unbearable by the second. you believed you could push through it though, waiting patiently for felix on the bed.

felix makes it home that night in an exceptionally happy mood. he smothers your face in millions of kisses, holding your hands tight and giggling into your neck. “i love you so much. i can’t wait for our little sprout”

it was difficult to keep his excitement contained around you, but he knew he didn’t have to. you are just as excited as he is.

-

you slice open the cake, a myriad of pink candies falling out the center. you were so excited to have your baby girl, you could already predict how well she and felix would get along.

“see?! she’s a girl. i knew it.”, seungmin said smugly.

“shut up, we get it. you were the only one that predicted she’s a girl anyways”, jisung replies, jokingly aggrivated.

“yeah, meaning i’m also the only one that was right”, he retorts with a wink.

jisung rolls his eyes, moving to you to give you a hug. it felt awkward hugging all the boys with a baby bump in the way, but it wasn’t all that big yet, so it wasn’t too bad. you continued having fun at the party, singing with the boys the entire time.

you’re so happy your girl is being born into such a good world. you’re lucky all the boys love you so much, you know they’ll all be amazing to your little sprout.

-

minho looked at you with an incredulous look on his face. “so you want me to make you tteokbokki, but instead of gochujang you want me to use… nutella?”

“i told you man, her pregnancy cravings are fucking crazy”, felix chimes in.

you quickly nod at minho, who instantly gets up to prepare it for you. there’s not a lot that minho wouldn’t do for you or your daughter, considering the fact that you’re best friends already. 

“so did you just call me here to cook because felix sucks at anything without a recipe?”

“for the most part yeah”, you let out a giggle. felix walks over to you, kissing you again and peppering them all over your face. a particularly loud groan leaves his lips, and minho jerks his head towards you both.

felix gets off you not too long after, but only to wrap you in a hug from behind, holding your bump up to ease the weight of her. minho visibly gagged at the sight of you two, “okay can you guys stop making out and actually talk to me now? i don’t feel like third wheeling”, he joked.

all three of you began to laugh, you were so excited to start this new chapter with felix.

-

fuck. what is happening? why does your heart feel so heavy? why do you feel so uneasy. maybe you’re just upset, you’re fine right? you sit on the bed, watching some edits of felix- your guilty pleasure.

all of a sudden, a sharp pain hits your gut. you groan out in pain, tears flooding your eyes. you begin to get up, trying your best to make it to the bathroom. you’re suddenly throwing up again, and you didn’t think anything of it since it was pretty normal. 

once you clean yourself up a little, you make your way back to the bed. the sharp pain hit you again, this time making you sink to the floor as you clutch your stomach. “fuck…” 

the feeling in between your thighs becomes uneasy, becoming excruciatingly painful. you feel something dripping down your thighs, taking a quick look at it. there’s a pool of blood dripping down onto the hardwood floor, when the pain comes back.

the tears leave your eyes in heavy sobs. you can’t pick yourself back up, the pain becoming unbearable. you’re too weak to make it anywhere, so you try to scream.

you attempts fail, crawling to the bed to grab your phone. you didn’t make it in time. your body gave out on you, blood pouring out from you. you didn’t want to die. you just wanted your sprout. why did this is have to happen?

“y/nnie! i’m home!”

your head jerked up in the direction of the door. you let out a guttural scream. “FELIX… H-HELP… please…”

your voice got weaker, not even being able to find the strength to talk. felix rushes to your room, and the world around him stopped. his heart shattered in his chest, immediately calling an ambulance.

“baby… no! stay with me… please. deep breaths okay? you’ll be okay.”

he listened to the dispatcher for instructions on how to help, your eyes slowly fluttering shut. you’re too weak to carry on.

you woke up in the hospital, your baby bump suddenly gone. you touched around your tummy, looking for your little sprout. you noticed felix right next to you, eyes red and incessant tears pouring down his face.

he’s trembling as he grabs your hand, running his thumb over your knuckles. “if i had just gotten there sooner-“

“no felix i… im so sorry. i failed you… i failed our sprout.”, loud sobs filled the room, not being able to contain your emotions anymore. you had lost her for good. she was gone. 

“it’s… not your fault. rest now okay? you lost a lot of blood. we can talk in the morning” 

he gave you a quick kiss to your forehead, and you shut your eyes. the sleep never came.

-

you and felix are in bed again, just like you always were. but things were different now. everything felt empty, depressing. you felt empty. you didn’t have your sprout with you.

felix asked to go on hiatus now, wanting to be there for you in every moment. he became hyper-attentive towards you, scared that you might go down a bad path.

the miscarriage took a toll on him just as much as it did you, except you were focusing on the physical parts more. felix watched at night as you stared at your own bare breasts after a shower, producing milk for a baby that wasn’t even growing inside of you anymore. you ran your fingers along your many stretch marks, the skin on your tummy becoming flabby and soft. 

you felt ugly. felix was still there to reassure you through everything, but you didn’t know what to do. you blankly stare at your messages from time to time, getting many messages from your family, close friends and the boys, checking up on you frequently.

felix doesn't know what to do anymore. he doesn't know if he can live with the pain, knowing what could’ve been. it hurts you even more to see felix like this. the sunshine in him has been dulled out, the only thing left are his eyes, swirling with only pain now. 

the guiltiness overtook you most nights, felix holding you tight as you both cried again and again. you haven’t slept properly since it happened. seven fucking months.

so close, yet so far.

</3

| • skz hyung line — caught simping for them • |

📁 pairing; bangchan x gn! reader, lee minho x gn! reader, seo changbin x gn! reader, hwang hyunjin x gn! reader

📁 cw; swearing, nsfw joke, furry joke

📁 a/n; if this doesn't turn up in tags i'll cry ☹️ ENJOY PLS ILY

#01 — bangchan • 방찬 !

#02 — lee minho • 이민호 !

#03 — seo changbin • 서창빈 !

#04 — hwang hyunjin • 황헌진 !

now my heart's broken

r u fixing it?

📁 pairing; bangchan x gn! reader

📁 cw; angst/angst to fluff, unresolved/open ended, swearing, unedited, mention of sex (literally just the word sex once in the whole fic) 1.1k

📁 summary; famous rapper bangchan celebrates his five years on a radio show, and previous relationships are brought up. will you remain strangers, or give a friendship that first started over five years ago another try? inspired by broken cd — beabadoobee and loosely from prompt generators.

📁 a/n; word vomit LMAOOOO idek what's going AWN 😓 please say nothing. please do nothing. please do not perceive my work.

'now, stays are very excited to be celebrating the anniversary of your debut! in fact, we're planning on putting this episode up on your anniversary!'

bangchan leans back comfortably in his seat and lets out a laugh. 'yeah! i'm so excited to be celebrating five years with my stays.'

the radio show host smiles and flips through his notes, chattering away as he reads. 'many news outlets and netizens have labelled you as the soloist king of k-rap music, do you agree?'

'well, i'm not the biggest advocate of myself, but i think i've really grown as an artist.'

'of course! your growth has been amazing, a small soundcloud artist to one of the biggest idols of the decade. now, why don't we hear a snippet from your first official song from your label?'

a soundbite of a laugh spills out from the headphones over his ears and the speakers littered around him.

a contagious laugh, one he could never get out of his head and brought him happiness like he never new. almost like iced tea on a hot day, or a pancake flipped and cooked to buttery perfection.

a supporting smile, one that beamed proudly at him from the control room that made him shy away from the mic, embarassed to be singing a love song in front of the person it was about.

the editors that let you step into the booth to hold his hand encouragingly and cheer him on. your laugh was picked up on the recording and the production team mixed it into the song on his request.

plus, chan was happy to have you as a part of his first ever professional song. he thought that there was no way he could've done better if you weren't there.

your smile. your laugh. your touch.

but that was then.

sometimes, when all is quiet and still, he can't help but let his mind wander back.

australian beaches. he is sixteen and bringing you to the cove he hid in when he was little, one that he promised to hide away from everyone, forever. he sits with you inside, a little too close for just friends. he still has the sand dollar you picked for him, and it rests hidden behind his books on the shelf next to his bed.

midnight meetings. waking up to a rapping at his window and a familiar face that he can't help but get a fright from when it's pressed up against his window at three in the morning. fear that dissipates to excitement when you crawl into his window and talk with him for hours on end.

rooftop adventures. he sits on the side with his legs dangling over hen edge, and maybe it's dangerous, but when has he really cared? his beat up guitar rests on his lap, abandoned after he finishes his serenade. his hands find themselves tangled into your hair lips pressed up against yours until he speeds down the stairs with you trailing behind him.

mornings after. he turns from his spot where he's cooking your breakfast to your sleepy stature and pulls you into a perfect kiss. he tastes like coffee and kimchi eggs and sex, and he tastes like home. his 'i love you's are written into your perfectly plated food, a stark contrast to his own messy breakfast.

lonely nights. he used to fall asleep in his studio during his debut, and he didn't know if the lack of comfort came from the position he was in, or the fact that you weren't there. he can hear the twinge of sadness that you hide in a passing comment when you next see him, and he hangs his head and stays silent when you point out how he didn't get back to his apartment again.

the hate. i mean, even if he was signed to a label with no dating ban, it was expected, as an idol's partner, to get hate for just dating him. he tried to protect you from it, and stop you from reading them, but he got frustrated. after all, you knew what you were getting yourself into. it wasn't his fault, anything his fans were saying. if anything, he was glad his fans cared so much.

he doesn't really know if he meant to, but he pushes you away. he knows, instantly after the breakup, that it was his fault. you didn't change, he did. he hated how his fans celebrated when they announced that chan was single. he hated how he treated you just before he left you. he hated how he treated you like a burden, and he's so sorry.

he's so sorry.

he just wishes he had another chance, he loved-

'chan?'

a smiling face pulls him out of his trance, and he coughs awkwardly. he's sure he couldn't have zoned out for more than a few seconds, but he laughs to fill out the silence.

somehow, even his laugh sounds empty.

'um, so fans have noticed that you've been credited in all aspects of the song. what was your inspiration behind it, or better yet who?'

'ah, yes. some of my older fans may remember that i had a partner in my first few months after debut, and we sadly broke up.' chan forces a smile out. his hands fiddle with the wire of the headphones nervously.

'oh, wow. i suppose you were quite happy when you got signed at such a young age, did this profession come easy to you?'

and chan could let the lie slip out like water, a smile and a mutter of how hard he's been working, or how he found it so natural when he stepped up to the mic in the studio.

but he knows what happened.

he takes a breath. 'it hurt when i was seventeen. i don't think i would even be in this chair right now without their love. and, if they're listening in, thank you. i've never reached out since we...ended, but, to this day, i really want to. i'm sorry, and berry misses you.'

he smiles, and it's bittersweet. sadness lingers in his eyes. he bites the skin underneath his bottom lip until it turns purple.

'well, thank you everyone for tuning into this week's episode of rap radio, and we'll be saying goodbye to bangchan!'

he waves, and a wave of relief washes over him.

and, if he's lucky, he'll find a message from a stranger he knows all too well when he next checks his phone.

JMSRYFDCGVHGUYIUKJMNBHGDXFCG BNBGFTRTDXCV BNJ give him to me

My First Love

Simptober Romance Tropes M-list

Pairing: Chan (skz) x fem!reader

Genre: Fluff

Notes: first time doing head cannonsss :) I thought It was a more relatable way of explaining it? idkkk lmk what u think ;0

-please read responsibly, and remember that this work is fiction and meant strictly for imaginative fun. the idols used in fics are more accurately faceclaims and personality outlines for imaginary characters, and should not be interpreted as factual representations of existing people

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when I say this man if first love coded I MEAN IT

such a gentleman omllll

takes you out of a first date to a picnic (haha my other fic)

and after that date you just know that he's the one, there's no way to explain it.

the two of you exchange numbers and you start texting each other casually (just when ur bored)

def the type to make you giggle over text, like the ",yeah?" at the end of everything

ur sitting at home on your couch

its been 2 months of small dates and texting nonstop

you hear a knock on ur window its rlly late at night and ur home alone

although you might just be over reacting you don't really know what to do

so you text him, chan.

he responds in a literal heartbeat like this man was waiting for a text from you

you text him and you ask for him to come over, you wanted to take it slow w him so he had never been over to ur house before

you were nerrrrvoussssss

he shows up about 10 mins later with a big brown paper bag

'whats that?'

'gotchu something' he says back

AHHHH imagine it with him winking at youuuuu BUTTERFLYSSSS

You grab the bag and he locks the door for you while you open the bag

he got u food :(((((( WAHHHHH SO SWEEETTT

diff ur favorite too, you had mentioned it before during one of your past dates w him

you both plop on your couch. you lean into him and you can tell that he's blushing a bit

his ears are all redd :(((((

ahhhhh image him in his big hoodie with a beanieeee

and like ur just eating w him half sleepy maybe watching a movie or something

just an absolute sweetheart

falling asleep together on the couch

HES JUST SO BF MATERIAL

"the one" first love and will always be

morning walks to late night walks in the rain to snuggling at home

going to the mall together and him absolutely spoiling you

there for you 24/7

so understanding omlll

actually giggles the first time you call him by a nickname

pure sweetness until the day he takes you back to that same park you had a picnic at

AND HE PROPOSESSSS

From first love to forever in love

Tag: @anny-bah@eee5533@mixtape-racha@weedforthoughtz@ren0325@felixvsp@hwangrimi @sanriiolino @painstakingly-juno@herarcadewasteland@dabiscrustyfeet@kai-jilee@sungiesoonie@slvtty4channiee@revelaffee@buckys-pillow, @staygirl86 @chlodavids@jinnie-ret@bbygrlhannie@rebecca-johnson-28 @turtledove824@interstellarairwaves@yearofthetiger25@minhos4thkitty@fiqire@backintomykpopphaseagain@liknws@tinyelfperson@aaasia111@yangbbokari@hafsah-ali@sleepyleeji@skzhoes@yamaguchiwestad@leonswifesstuff@nappynapnaps

ahem... i volunteer as tribute

The First Date - Felix

Simptober First Dates M-List

Pairing: Felix (skz) x fem!reader

Genre: Fluff ;))))

Notes: idkkkkk I don’t rlly like this one to much💀 he is a little social butterfly tho so ig it workssss

-please read responsibly, and remember that this work is fiction and meant strictly for imaginative fun. the idols used in fics are more accurately faceclaims and personality outlines for imaginary characters, and should not be interpreted as factual representations of existing people

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The story begins with a chance encounter at a cafe, where you spotted Felix. You were going about your day, sipping on your coffee and lost in thought when you noticed him. He sat at a nearby table, and every now and then, he seemed to cast subtle glances in your direction. His eyes held a certain warmth and curiosity that piqued your interest.

It was one of those moments where time seemed to slow down, and you couldn't help but wonder what was going on in his mind. The cafe was bustling with activity, but in that brief connection, it was as if you were the only two people in the room.

After some time, Felix finally approached you. His smile was friendly and welcoming, and he struck up a conversation. You both exchanged pleasantries, and he mentioned that he had noticed you from across the cafe. It was a simple yet intriguing beginning to what would become your first date.

Over time, you got to know each other better, and you discovered shared interests, dreams, and aspirations. You felt drawn to his warmth and charisma, and you found yourself eagerly anticipating your first date. It was a mix of excitement and nervousness, a feeling that made your heart race as the day of your date drew near.

On the day of your first date with Felix, you met at a charming little bistro with dimly lit corners and a cozy ambiance. The anticipation was palpable, but as he greeted you with a warm smile, the nerves began to fade away. The connection you had established through those cafe glances had grown into something deeper and more meaningful.

You both shared a delicious meal, and the conversation flowed effortlessly. It was as if you had known each other for a long time. Felix was attentive, asking about your day, your interests, and your thoughts, and you found yourself genuinely enjoying his company.

After the meal, he suggested taking a leisurely walk through a nearby park. It was a beautiful evening, and the two of you strolled hand in hand. The air was filled with the soft sounds of nature, and the park was illuminated by the warm glow of streetlights.

As the date came to an end, Felix looked into your eyes, his gaze filled with sincerity. With a soft-spoken voice, he asked if he could see you again. You nodded.

Tag: @anny-bah @eee5533 @mixtape-racha @weedforthoughtz@ren0325 @felixvsp @hwangrimi @sanriiolino @painstakingly-juno @herarcadewasteland @dabiscrustyfeet @kai-jilee @sungiesoonie @slvtty4channiee @revelaffee @buckys-pillow, @staygirl86 @chlodavids @jinnie-ret @bbygrlhannie @rebecca-johnson-28   @turtledove824 @interstellarairwaves @yearofthetiger25 @minhos4thkitty @fiqire @backintomykpopphaseagain @liknws @tinyelfperson @aaasia111 @yangbbokari @hafsah-ali @sleepyleeji @skzhoes @yamaguchiwestad @leonswifesstuff @nappynapnaps

0313 (c.b.g.)

pairing: choi beomgyu x reader (no prns used)

genre: fluff, angst no comfort, lovers to strangers

wc: ~600

cw: /

synopsis: the three times choi beomgyu told you he loved you. 

notes: listen to heather by conan gray while reading!

thank you to flo (@tsukette), cherry (@staranghae), & lav (@sunny-reis) for beta reading!

©️ hotteoki || do not translate or repost on to any other platforms

the first time, it had been backstage during one of his rehearsals for a play he was about to star in. he was the main lead. you were friends with the female lead. he mentioned before she was soobin’s cousin— or was it taehyun? he got the role after weeks of practicing with you and auditioning with clammy hands. you remembered being so proud of him when he skipped over to tell you, hugging him excitedly as he lifted you from the ground and spun you around.

he had his earbuds in, youhad  looked over at him trying to figure what he was listening to,  though you never got to find out. nirvana, perhaps? you knew he liked their songs. he caught you staring at him. it was embarrassing for you, but he didn’t mind. he simply gave you a soft smile, mouthing those three words to you. you thought you were imagining things. 

the second time, it was after that very rehearsal. he did so well. to celebrate, he took you on a walk by the han river. “that’s so cliché,” you muttered teasingly upon seeing where you were headed. “pardon me for being a gentleman,” he retorted, giving you a kiss on the head. you caught a faint scent on his clothes, and you smiled, knowing it was about to be your new reason to steal his clothes. 

he liked stopping every now and then to take pictures of the sunset, and you liked stopping during those moments  to take pictures of him. he caught on soon enough, and laughed loudly, but didn’t bother resisting it. he then pulled you by your hand to his side, pressing his forehead against yours. “y’know i meant it, right? i really do love you” 

the third time, it’s after exams. he’s walking you home, as usual, with one of his earbuds in your ear and the other in his. he’s wearing his black hoodie, and his scent is stronger than ever. it isn’t the one you normally recognise on him, though. 

he sits down by the fence, dragging you to sit down next to him as well. he smiles cheekily, before he continues to talk mindlessly about his day, but the winter breeze sending the whiffs of perfume in your direction reminds you of what you have to do. you steel yourself before speaking.

“beomgyu, we have to talk”  his cute little frown appears, “why, what’s wrong?” you sigh, “please just admit it.” 

…

“what do you mean?” “beomgyu, i’m not stupid. i see the way you act around her, and before you interrupt me, you can’t use the play as an excuse anymore, it’s been four months. even when we’re together, your eyes wander to her direction. when we talk about your day, it always manages to include her somehow. hell- beomgyu i can even smell her on you!” 

…

“but i love you” 

your vision blurs. you can’t see his face anymore, “no you don’t, beomie.” you’re shaking your head. he looks at you pleadingly.

…

“but i do…” 

“no, beomie, you don’t. please don’t make this any harder than it is.” you’re standing up, “i’ve made this decision long ago, and i’ve made my peace with it.” 

you bend down to give him a final hug, but before he can even process your actions,

you leave and never look back, not even when he calls for your name again. 

the two times choi beomgyu told you he loved you, he meant it. 

the third time choi beomgyu tells you he loves you, he lies.

taglist: @asjkdk @weird-bookworm @dikeu

networks - @kflixnet k-labels @kbookshelf neverendingdreams-net straykidsland @k-films pirateeznet

this taehyun... deserves to burn in hell break up with y/n cuz ain't no way. If this is love, may it be in the pits of darkness I don't want it

signs (k.t.h.)

pairing: kang taehyun x reader (no pronouns used)

wc: 1k

warnings: profanities (swearing, cheating, arguments, threats of breaking up, gaslighting), alcohol consumption

notes: this is not meant to represent taehyun irl in any way possible! this is purely for entertainment purposes

©️ gyusangels | do not repost

"you're so pathetic," taehyun ran a hand through his hair, sucking in deep breaths through his gritted teeth. "is that all you have to fucking say? after i've given you more than enough chances to fix your shit? are you fucking serious right now, taehyun?" you scoffed, not quite believing the words coming out of his mouth. "i didn't fucking ask you to!"

he wasn't wrong.

you should've left him the first time he cheated on you. and the next. and the next. and probably the next five times.

but you loved him too much. besides, your relationship wasn't always like this.

two years ago, when taehyun was your new seatmate. he had been extremely shy at first, always keeping to himself and not looking anyone in the eye, until you introduced yourself with your hand stretched out, which he took without hesitation.

you spent the next several months getting told off for not paying attention, and for chatting too much with taehyun, but neither of you cared all that much. it was almost as if it was just the two of you in your own world.

you thought you had found yourself a good friend, and you had been ecstatic when he asked you out a few months later. he would take you out on dates every day after school, letting you drag him around with a lovesick smile on his face. taehyun would be your number one supporter. always. he gave you the comfort you had been looking for all your life, and provided you with a safe zone to stay in.

one year later, in that very july, he held a party. it was the first time he ever hosted one. he hadn't wanted to, but his sister convinced him it would be fun. that was when your relationship took a turn for the worst. he didn't cling to your arm, staring at others with wide eyes like he usually did in parties; he lingered around the girls outside of school, their bodies a bit too close together for your liking. you had ignored the signs.

he spent the next week ignoring you at school, leaning over other girls' desks to talk to them, rather than you. even kai, who you weren't all that close with, approached you with a worried expression, asking if you and taehyun were okay. you had forced a small smile on your face, responding that everything was alright. he gave you a look, saying he didn't believe you, but he wouldn't push you, offering a chance for you to talk to him if you wanted to. and so you did.

a month later or so, you found yourself being close friends with kai, which was how you knew something was wrong when he pulled you aside after school. you felt your heart shatter when he told you he caught taehyun kissing another girl and leading her to his dorm.

you kept denying it, giving excuses for taehyun and convincing yourself kai was mistaken, but it was too obvious. you knew taehyun didn't want you anymore, you weren't stupid, but you were selfish. if he wasn't going to break up with you, then neither were you. deep down, you knew you were just hoping things would go back to the way they were. before the stupid party.

you had confronted him, as he admitted what he had done and promising to never do it again, because you were the only one he truly loved, and that none of the other girls could ever compare.

and you fell for it.

every. single. time.

you were honestly surprised with yourself. your wishful thinking was so strong you truly believed that he didn't want anyone else but you.

which was how you ended up in his dorm, arms crossed, glassy-eyed, phone with evidence in your clenched hands. "look, i don't know what you want from me! you said it yourself! you've forgiven me so many times and still, you get surprised when the day ends with us yelling at each other!" if taehyun wasn't mad at first, his tone made it clear he was now. you had to physically dig your fingernails into your palms to control yourself from punching him in the face.

"fine, then let's break up, since you wanted to break up so badly, taehyun-" before you could continue, taehyun's glaring eyes shot up. his gaze was so cold you felt your body shrink subconsciously. "don't call me that," was all he said. "what, your name?" you sneered. he titled his head, daring you to continue, "yeah, my name. call me tae, or tyun, but you, of all people, are not calling me by my full name. and we're not breaking up."

you stared at him incredulously, "excuse me? what do you mean we're not breaking up? you're the one who said you wanted to." "i never said i wanted to break up! i just said you're being fucking annoying and clingy!" "oh, i'm sorry! i didn't know getting upset over my boyfriend cheating on me was clingy? let me just shut up and let you fuck every girl in the school, yeah?" you tugged on your sleeve discreetly. no matter how much you told yourself you hated him in this moment, you knew you still loved him, and yelling at him pained you.

"sure, go do that! you didn't seem to have any issue with that the last few times!" "fuck, taehyun! what do you want from me?!" your tears were overflowing and your cheeks were getting wet. he visibly softened at your sobs, "don't... don't do that. don't cry." "leave me alone, i'll cry if i want to cry," you turned away from him, embarassed.

"you know i still love you. seeing you cry hurts me," taehyun's voice wavered. "do i? do i know that? cause you seem to have no issues with going around with every girl who breathed in your direction." you heard his footsteps coming nearer, what you didn't expect, though, was his arms wrapping around your form, his chin resting on top of your head. he let out a defeated sigh.

"you have no idea just how much i love you."

o... oh wow, wasn't expecting that. I need y/n to pls move on to me she could do so much better. CHAN QUIT USING THAT POOR GIRL CUZ UR STILL STUCK ON UR CHILDHOOD BESTFRIEND

My Biggest Regret

Part three: 18+

**

Another successful show had the whole band panting and huffing from exhaustion.

The boys all laid on the different couches in their backstage room trying to calm down and discussing the events that had just occurred.

All of them were changed out of their outfits and were now in comfy clothes since they had all taken showers.

Their minions were running around getting them whatever they wanted and treating them like royalty.

“Hey Chan are we still spending thanksgiving with your parents?” Han asked the group leader as he was scrolling through the flight app looking for tickets home for the Christmas holiday.

“Yeah, my mum says all of you must come,” Chan was texting one of the managers trying to figure out their schedule for the next few weeks before they would get a flight back to Australia. He hadn’t been home for a few years and he couldn’t wait.

He wanted everything to be perfect. He didn’t want anything to come up like the other times he tried to go home.

“Do you know when we’re leaving?” Changbin asked looking up from his phone. His body was aching hence the reason why he was on the floor using a massage ball trying to release the tight notes in his back.

“We’ll have a meeting about it in a few days so we will find out then,” Changbin took note and continued to massage his muscles as everyone continued having small talk.

“Are we headed out tonight?” Seungmin asked the boys.

“Yeah definitely, I need to get laid tonight,” Hyunjin sat up and tied his hair up in a bun trying to check himself out in the big mirror. A normal thing he did.

“Bro, last time you said that I couldn’t sleep that night. If your getting laid, your getting laid at whoever’s home you chose,” I.N gags and stares at his Hyung who also looked very much shy at the fact that his little brother had heard him doing the deed.

“Uh! Hyunjin that’s so disgusting,” Felix scolds Hyunjin.

“Alright are we going to just talk all night or head out?” Hyunjin changed the subject. They all laugh and joke around but head into hair and makeup to get ready for the party.

The party was for idols only so there was definitely going to be alchohol, drugs and everything they desired.

Being a kpop idol with a clean image meant that they couldn’t do anything wrong in public but in private they were all a menace. The wild parties that ended up either with people throwing up in the pool or people blacking out on chairs and floors proved it.

Chan…When chan first debuted he had no idea it would be like this but he enjoyed it. He enjoyed being free and having alchohol run through his veins causing an adrenaline rush. He loved dancing till his feet hurt but most especially he loved the ladies.

He loved that fact that he was so famous, handsome and rich he would get any woman he desired. They all could, so it was no suprise that Chan was dating the smoking hot cheek who was new to the block.

He didn’t really know her name but he knew that she made him look good and that’s what mattered.

“Nice watch Hannie,” Leeknow complimented Han. The car was packed but they all could fit in.

“Yeah, it’s real Gold, it costed me a fortune.” He boasted and showed everyone the blinging watch that had diamonds all over.

“Don’t lose it, you know how you get when your on substances Hyung,” I.N pushes Han playfully and they start a playful little fight.

“Hey! Watch the suit! Watch the suit!” Hyunjin scolds the boys who were now out breath. They all ended up bursting out in laughter.

When they arrived, they were welcomed in with so much love and joy. Everybody loved the boys. Who wouldn’t? If people weren’t trying to get into their pants they were trying to get into their wallets and if they weren’t trying to get into their wallets they were trying to get their spotlight. This caused all of them to be cautious about the people around them but still they chose to be friendly to everyone and to talk to everyone.

The party was fun. Everyone was enjoying themselves. Hyunjin was surrounded by girls…well all of them except Chan who was with his girlfriend.

He was out of his mind and senseless. The alchohol slowly diluting in his blood.

The girl, Xio, was dancing all of him. His body was hot under his jacket so he took it off. His girlfriend now kissing and grinding all up on him.

“Wanna go somewhere quiet?” She whispered in his ear making him crave her even more. He was hungry for her. He needed her but not for the right reasons.

He needed her to use her for his sexual frustrations.

He smirks and puts his drink down. One hand wrapped around her waist as he drags her to the nearest room possible.

“I want you so bad Y/n,” he moans as he ripped her clothes off.

“Y/n? Who’s Y/n?” She furrows her eyebrows in confusion and looks up at the man who had now realized his mistake.

Fuck.

Meanwhile in Australia. Y/n was sat home with her mum when she recieved a text from Hannah. She hadn’t expected it. Her breathing hitched and excitement grew in her body. She couldn’t believe her eyes but something in her new that this was going to be a rough journey. The words rolled off her tongue painfully yet so easily.

Hannah Bhang🥰: Chan comes home in 2 weeks.

Butterflies were filling her stomach. Her hands were shaking as she thought of what to reply. She had so much to do. The love of her life was coming back home. Would she cry? Laugh? Panic? What was he like now? Tall? Buff? Was he still funny? Goofy? Or was he now mature? Was his curls still intact?

She was worried about things that were the least of her problems because little did she know the “love of her life” was currently receiving a blowjob on a bathroom floor.

**

“look! a shooting star!” you exclaimed. “quick, make a wish!” you added, closing your eyes. when you opened them you turned to look at felix. “what did you wish for?” you asked him, curious what his wish would be. he smiled widely at the question. “why would i make a wish if you’re already here?”

I have a bad feeling abt how this will progress

My Biggest Regret

Part four:

**

"Y/n pass me the tomatoes please,"

Chan's mum and Y/n had started cooking a big meal for the boys. It was currently 5 in the evening and Chan's dad had gone to pick up the boys from the airport leaving Hannah, Y/n and his mum cooking in a hot kitchen for 9 men. 9 grown men meant a lot of meat, a lot of bread and a lot of food in general.

"Here you go auntie," she passed the tomatoes and started on the dessert. Chan's favorite cheesecake. She hadn’t cooked it in a while but she knew she could, after all she made sure to in-grave the steps in her brain just incase Chan had ever asked her to make it for him.

"Mum I don't know why we're cooking so much for him!" This was the 50th time that evening that Hannah was complaining, "there just going to finish all this in 10 minutes!"

"Aish!" She smacked Hannah’s arm lightly causing Y/n to smile at the two and giggle, "all you've done is complain since morning! Be like Y/n and actually help," Hannah rolled her eyes and walked over to the oven to check on whatever was inside there.

"Y/nnie, my love, maybe go rest a little bit? You've been on your feet for a few hours,"

"It's okay auntie, we're almost done anyway so don't worry about it," Y/n assured Mama Bhang.

"Okay sweetie but aren't you so excited! Channie comes home!" She clapped her hands and spun a little.

"Yes I am excited, woah woah-" Y/n quickly grabbed the spoon that was about to hit the ground and handed it back to her.

"We must celebrate today don't you think?" The older lady stood by the stove and stirred one of the broths that were cooking, "how about some wine?"

"Mum, where shall I put this?" Hannah was holding a tray and it looked very hot. She was sweating a little too just like the rest of them.

"Just put it by the counter and start plating everything baby," she instructed the girl before turning back to a very concentrated Y/n, "so wine?"

"Yeah sure, I can go out and get some-"

"Oh! Don't be silly! You really thought I wouldn't have a stash of wine?" She teased and walked over to the caboards in the leaving room and walked back with two bottles in hand.

"Are we finishing both of them?" Y/n asked in shock looking at her elder grabbing three cups and setting them down.

"Oh sweetie! If we can, why not? We've been in the kitchen for hours! Don't we deserve this?" She poured and filled the glasses with wine and handed them out.

"Okay! I'm almost done with the sauce, I'm moving the hotpot onto the dining table, you two finish dishing up plates and start bringing them out,"

"Okay Mum, what about the ice cream? Should we put them in the coolers?"

"No, just feel the coolers with ice," she instructed Hannah before leaving the two in the kitchen.

"I've never seen her this happy before," Y/n giggled and started to stack the foods on the plates.

"Same to be honest, I don't think she was even this happy when I graduated," Hannah rolled her eyes and took a sip of her wine.

"Oh! Don't say that Hannah, you know we were all so excited," Y/n had attended the graduation and made sure to take a lot of pictures cause she was proud and she wanted to make an album of memories to give to Chan when he came back. She had stacked a lot of pictures of things he had missed including birthdays, graduations (including hers) and just casual dinners and parties. The book was thick and she couldn't wait to hand it to the boy.

"I just don't under why-"

"Hannah you can't have this grudge with your brother, I was also in pain and I was hurt but you can't keep holding onto the grudge, his on his way home right now, you should be celebrating. Don't ruin it by being angry! Let him get home and after dinner you can talk to him about it okay?"

"Ugh I hate it when you're right," Hannah rolled her eyes. They both took another sip from their glasses and finished up setting the dining table.

The balcony door was open revealing the hot grill outside waiting for Chan's dad to put the steak's on the grill.

It was around 6:30. The glasses of wine were empty and now filled again. They were all washing up the dishes and cleaning up the house because Mama Bhang had recieved a text saying they were pulling up in the drive way.

Y/n's stomach started to churn, she couldn't believe. Chan was here. Chan was finally here. The glass in her hand was suddenly empty again. She had chugged it down.

"Okay should we go take a shower now?" Hannah asked as she finished wiping the table. Her mum was laying blankets on the couch incase anyone was going to sleep on it and she put out a few snacks on the table for the boys.

"Yeah let's go," Y/n agreed and headed to Hannah's room. She closed the door behind them and Hannah poured another glass for Y/n.

"Are you trying to get me drunk?" Y/n asked already tipsy. They both giggled as Hannah nodded her head.

"If we're going to do this, let's atleast do it drunk?" She justified, well questioned.

"You're so silly!" Y/n chuckled and grabbed her towel to head into the bathroom.

Her head was spinning a little but she couldn't help but overthink everything. She couldn't contain her emotions. She couldn't explain how she felt. She could just simple day she was happy but that couldn't explain all of her emotions. She wanted answers from Chan. Why did he disappear? Did he still love her? Because she made sure to keep herself pure for him. She made sure to keep herself innocent for him because he had promised to be her first in everything.

"Y/n! Hurry up girl!" The knock on the door causes her to jump out of her trance and quickly get out of the bathroom. Hannah was sat on the bed scrolling through her socials.

“Okay I’m done,” she said while rolling her eyes playfully.

"Finally! I thought you passed out or something," Y/n put down her toilet bag and get dressed as Hannah was taking her shower.

She had decided to wear a cute blue body hugging dress that she had gotten from skims with a white and blue cardigan.

She then went on to put on some perfume and do a little bit of makeup. Her hair was then slicked back into a pony tail.

When Hannah was done she also wore something similar to Y/n's but hers was in red and she let her hair fall since it wasn't long enough to be put up.

They decided to take a few selfies and pictures since they both could agree they looked really cute and wifey material.

"Girls?! There here!" They hear Chan's mum yell throught he house. The two got up and finished the wine in their glasses and made their way downstairs.

"Oh my girls! You both look so beautiful," she cooed at the sight of both of them.

"Thank you mum! Now where are they?" Hannah was impatient, she wanted to see her brother and his friends.

The door handle wiggled and then opened revealing her dad and a bunch of people behind him.

"Geuss who's home," his voice boomed throughout the whole house.

"Move!" His mum run past his dad and jumped into Chan's arms. Her body trembled against his as she started to cry.

It was a beautiful sight and Hannah and Y/n couldn't help but tear up a little.

"Oh my baby Boy! I missed you so much. This can't be real," she cried in his arms as Chan allowed her too.

"Hey Mum, I missed you so much," he wouldn't admit it but tears dropped from his eyes aswell. He did miss his mum with everything in him.

"Well since those two are busy," Chan's dad cleared his throat while chuckling, "girls these are the guys, introduce yourselves," he encourages the two girls that stood behind the couches.

"Hey, I'm Hannah, Hannah Bhang. His little sister and this is Y/n, Y/n Y/l/n. She's a family friend." Hannah smiled and waved. Y/n waved too, since she wasn't used to being people around her age she looked terrified but in all honesty she was just shy.

"Nice to meet you finally! I'm leeknow," he walked over to them to shake their hand. "That's Changbin, Han, Felix, Hyunjin, Seungmin and I.N," he points at the different guys. They both smiled and waved at each of them. Y/n was trying so hard to remember all their names.

The blonde guy caught her eye though. Hyunjin was it? His was so pretty but what made her fall for him more was his soft plump lips.

"Welcome to Australia," Y/n finally said, "Make yourself at home." She smiled and lead them to sit down.

"Hey! hey! hey! I haven't met them yet!" Chan's mum said after she finally let go of Chan and dragged the boy into the house, they all chuckle and get up again to greet their elder. She made sure to give them hugs and kisses.

"Hannah!" A not so familiar voice called distracting them from the sight in-front of them. They both turn to Chan. "Are you not going to kiss your brother hello?" He chuckled and wrapped his arms around her. His eyes automatically falling on Y/n.

He gasps and analyzes her figure, she was even more beautiful than he could remember. She looked so innocent and so grown up now.

The guilt started to eat away at him. It started to slowly creep up and it made his body heat up.

"Okay okay you're squeezing me to death!" Hannah was panting and trying to wiggle out of his strong grip.

"Woah," was all he could say. He almost even dropped his travel bag. "Y/n?"

"Hey Channie!" She smiled and waved at the boy who quite literally looked like he was about to pass out.

"Long time no see ehhh?"

**

I told u ths wasnt going to progress prettily😞

My Biggest Regret

Part five:

**

His arms wrapped around her as fast as they could. Pulling her against his body. He couldn't believe it. She was there.

The nights he would cry himself to sleep because of the lonely feeling that no one seemed to fill except her played in his mind. The days where he would pick up his phone to try to call her but knew he couldn't, played in his mind.

She was right in front of him.

"I missed you so much Aya," He whispered to Y/n. Her scent filled his nostrils and all of a sudden he was the 14 year old boy running around the playground with his girl bestfriend. So innocent, so happy and so in love.

"I missed you too Channie," she whispered back to him. She was trying to keep her tears in but she totally failed. The tears slowly wetting his hoodie. Just like at the airport but he didn't care, he never did.

"Hey, don't cry, you're too beautiful to cry," his touch was so soft. He wiped the tears from her eyes and kissed her forehead.

"Yuck gross!" Hannah exclaimed when she had realized the two were now just staring and smiling at one another.

"Hannah, Stop it! I've been waiting for years to see this happen!" Chan's mum smacked Hannah on the  back of the head before admiring the two lovers who were both in their own world.

Unlike Hannah who was rambling in anger while her mum and dad just admired the couple in-front  of them.

The rest of the boys sat in confusion. Trying to understand what was going on because they were very sure that their leader was in a relationship back home. They were sure that their leader was getting all the girls and screwing them every chance he could get so why was his mum calling them love birds? Did they miss a chapter? Did any of them know what was going on back home?

Han looked over at Changbin trying to communicate with his eyes, trying to get answers but Changbin, being his slow self, couldn't understand what was going on.

"Shall we show you guys to your room as these guys catch up?" Chan's dad interrupted the little chattering that was going on.

"Yes please," I.N replied and they all got up and carried their bags following right behind.

"Okay Chan, I'm going to say it. I.N is smoking hot!" Hannah exclaimed and collapsed on the couch. He looked over at his little sister and chuckled. He wasn't surprised at her reaction because when he was away she would always make such comments to piss him off.

"I don't think you want to mess with him, his quite the player," Chan responded.

How ironic Chan because aren't you the same person screwing other girls while you claim to love with your bestfriend?

Hannah whined and looked up to her older brother. "Ugh you’re no fun,"

"You missed me though," he teased back.

"Sure," Hannah stuck out her tongue and laid back down on the couch.

"I'll go take a shower and we can catch up yeah?" Chan hadn't let go of Y/n's hand. He was still holding on and he didn't let go. He refused to let go but if he did want to shower he eventually would have too.

"Okay that's fine, I need to set up the snack table anyway," she smiled at the older boy. The light in her eyes was brighter than ever and her skin was glowing. Chan couldn't take his eyes off her. Not at all but again he knew he had too. He finally let go and grabbed his suitcases to head to his room.

The living room was now boy free. Chan's dad came back to start on the grill and Chan's mum was by his side helping. They wanted to get everything ready because they knew the boys were hungry. Who wouldn’t be?

Meanwhile Hannah was complaining about how living with 9 boys (including her dad) was going to be the most excruciating pain ever.

Y/n on the other hand was in lala land. Chan was more handsome and the most beautiful. His muscles were bigger and he was way more taller and his jawline was sharper than ever. He was just perfect.

"Y/n dear, will you help me bring out the drinks?"

"Yes, sure auntie," she replied politely then made her way into the kitchen and she grabbed the beers and soft drinks out of the fridge. She then put them in the coolers and started making the punch and put it in jugs.

"Do you need help?" A low voice makes her jump. She quickly turned to look at the door where she saw non other than Hyunjin.

His hair was wet indicating that he had came out the shower and he was dressed in sweats and a shirt. He had a soft smile on his face.

"Um, no not really. You should go sit down. You've been traveling for hours," she smiled and continued to pour the punch into the jug.

"Yeah but I'd rather help. You all have already prepared such a nice meal. You might have been in the kitchen all day,"

"Not really no, would you like something to drink maybe?" She asked the boy who was now leaning on the counter watching her in awe.  He was admiring her. Who wouldn't? She was so beautiful.

"Hm, what about some of that punch. Did you make it yourself?"

"Yeah I did, my mum taught me how too," she grabbed a cup and poured some punch and passes it to the older man. He took a sip and quite literally moans.

"That's really good," he said while his eyes were wide in shock.

"Thank you," she giggled and walked over to the cooler to carry it.

"No let me," Hyunjin said realizing how heavy it was. He didn't mean to get close to her the way he did but in a way he did mean too. He wanted to feel her and he was slick with it.

"No it's fine-" but before she could protest his body was against her back and his hands reach over her carrying the cooler over her head and out of the kitchen.

She stood there in shock. His body was against hers and she couldn't help but turn red. If anyone had seen that it would have been a problem.

"Hey Y/n? Mums wondering if you could bring out her wine for her," Hannah's head popped around the door.

"Okay, coming," she grabbed the bottles and made her way to the living room where she finds a few boys sat on the couch watching football while Chan's dad was setting the stuff on the table.

She handed the bottle to Chan's mum and sat next to Hannah who was now sitting next to I.N.

The two were talking about something, totally in their own world while mama Chan was getting to know the boys better.

Slowly by slowly the whole living room was filled as more of the boys came out of their rooms. Chan came out last but was eager to talk to Y/n.

He wanted to know where they stood. He wanted to know how she was. He wanted to know if she was better. He most importantly wanted to apologize but he wouldn't get the chance to because his sister grabbed him once he walked downstairs.

He was confused. Why did his sister need to talk to him? Did he do something wrong?

Y/n knew what their talk was going to be about so she wasn't surprised. She was just worried about Hannah. She Was praying that she would get her closure and that she would stop being mad at him.

The two disappear out back brining Y/n’s attention back to the living room and the people around her.

"So Y/n, You and Chan..." Seungmin spoke up over the noise. "Are you guys a thing or something?"

"Uhh," she didn't know how to answer this, "we used to be? I geuss," she takes a sip of her drink.

"Uhhh, so how long have you guys been bestfriends?" Felix joined the conversation now interested as well.

"We were born two weeks apart. So ever since I was born," she let out a small laugh and smiled over at the boys who were so intrigued by her, "How's straykids?" She asked them.

"A lot of work, just really busy. But really fun. A lot of parties a lot of events-"

"A lot of girls," Han interrupted earning him a huge smack on the head.

"Ow! What?! It's true!" Y/n looked at them suspiciously but decided to shrug it off.

"Maybe one day we can take you to an event with us!" I.N smiled cheerfully.

"Uhh no! I don't do parties." She shook her head and put her drink down. Eager to know how Hannah and Chan were doing.

"Um...I'm going to check on those two, I'll be back," she informed everyone in the room and headed to the back yard. She spied on them. Trying not to be seen but when she looked at both of them, her stomach started to turn.

The both of them were in a heated argument. It was clear. It looked like Hannah was the one yelling the loudest. Y/n knew she had to step in or it could go left.

It took guts but she walked out to the garden. Their conversation becoming clear to hear.

"You weren't there Chan!"

"What do you expect from me Hannah?! I'm busy! I have a life and I can't keep coming back to Australia just to see you do little things that you're probably going to forget!"

"Oh wow! Chan, you know in my lowest times I thought you would be there. You weren't. Y/n was and she is the best older sister I have ever had and you will never ever be half the women she is, I don’t even know why your back after all these years! We were fine without you!"

**

JKHKGFDYRSDTFYUYIJNHBGVFCTYYVUBINJ

I want this

Pairing : Dad!Han Jisung x F!Reader TW : newborn baby ; incredibly fluffy ; Han being a cute overprotective dad ; slightly suggestive near the end ; Word Count : 0.8k Request : nope! A/N : 1 more day until I finally have a day off!! YAY!!! More dad skz fluff?!?! ABSOLUTELY!

It was late, or better yet, it was early, extremely early in the morning. It was the first night since you had brought home your daughter that she hadn’t woken up at least 5 times in the middle of the night to eat. She was finally settling into her room and for the most part, she was sleeping through the night, only waking up once to be fed and then go right back to sleep. 

You couldn’t have asked for a better partner to share this journey with you, Jisung was the most supportive and helpful person you could have by your side while you were not only healing, but on nights when you just couldn’t get out of bed from pure exhaustion. You were thankful to not only him, but the company as well for giving him such a long period of time off work to focus on not only taking care of you, but having time to bond with his new daughter and be a father. 

Finally being able to get some adequate sleep was something that both you and Jisung needed, but when you felt his side of the bed shift and you saw in the low light of the digital clock that he was sitting up, you immediately started to panic. Maybe it was the fact that he was giving off an aura of panic, or maybe it was the fact that you hadn’t heard anything in the baby monitor to cause him to jump up like that, or maybe it was a mixture of both that had you sitting up as well and grabbing the video monitor to make sure your baby was alright. 

“Sorry, honey.” He whispered breathlessly before letting out a heavy sigh and falling back against the pillow, his hand over his heart that you could almost hear beating in the silence that followed his words. “I could have sworn I heard her wake up… Maybe I should check on her to make sure she’s okay…” 

He started moving to get out of the bed, but you grabbed his hand, keeping him from getting up completely, and pulled him back down beside you. “Sungie, she’s fine. Look…” You handed him the monitor and his eyes scanned over the picture, focusing mainly on the sound of her tiny sighs as she slept peacefully in the room right across the hall. “You have nothing to worry about.” 

“I know…” He mumbled, handing you the video monitor for you to place on the nightstand once again. “But what if she’s hungry again? What if her nappy is wet? What if the blanket is too warm and she’s overheating? What if she’s cold? I just want her to be comfortable… I don’t want her to cry. You know… My heart breaks whenever she cries. I don’t like seeing her upset.” 

You could have sworn that in that moment your heart grew about 2 times its original size. “You are the most amazing man, the most amazing father ever, you know that, right?” You murmured, scooting closer to him and wrapping your arms around his chest. “If I wasn’t bleeding so bad right now I’d-“ 

His finger moved to your lips to stop your thoughts for a second, his eyes glancing around the room, and for a moment you thought he heard the baby again, but then he glanced down at you with a devious smile. “I’ll get the towel.” He whispered, although there was excitement in the hushed words. 

“Sungie!” You whisper shouted to him, but he was already scrambling out of the bed, his legs tangled in the blankets, but it was both adorable and somehow sexy as hell how much he wanted you, and you wanted him just as bad. “We gotta be quiet.” You said between giggles as he walked back into the room, a dark towel hanging over his shoulder as he walked over to the bed. 

“You have to be quiet. If I remember correctly, you’re the one who had the neighbors banging on the door that one time.” He said quite cockily, climbing on top of you and kissing down your neck. “You’re so beautiful… Wanna get married?” 

You snorted softly, the sound turning into a soft moan as he nibbled softly on your sensitive skin. “Sung… we’re already engaged…” You said between a mixture of moans and giggles. 

“Oh…” He paused, pushing himself up a little, his eyes lighting up and shining in the dim light of the room. “God, I’m so fucking lucky!” He cheered, his voice rising and before he had the chance to do anything more, the soft whimpering of your daughter came through the monitor. “Shit…” He sighed, pushing himself up off of you. “I’ll get her… Get some sleep, honey.” 

Your mouth hung open and your heart hammered in your chest as you watched him sprint out the door. It would be hard to sleep, especially after he got you so worked up, but when you rolled over and watched him scoop your daughter out of the crib and cradle her against his chest, that excitement dwindled and turned into adoration, love, devotion. You knew that he was the man that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, and if given the time, have maybe one or two more babies with. 

Perm. Taglist : @whatudowhennooneseesyou @duchesskaren @mytherapisttoldmenotto @lovesunshinefelix @moon0fthenight @kurolils @maruskz @hello-2-u-from-me @mrswolfiechan @bunnychangbin @his-angell @if-spearb @yomomma104 @lanatheawesome @facelesswrittes @grannyindehouse @cutie-wooyo @felixmainacc @syuuji @jiisungllvr @yukichan67 @randomwimp @silentreadersthings @cutiespaghetti @furiousheartpoetry @its-hannjisung @lixpixstix @felixluvr915 @wordsofkpop @kayleigh-28 @szkstay @spnwinchestersd @fleatree @yehsehneeah @vampcharxter @iloveksmohsomuch @lvlnijiro @neteyamsmate4life

I'm officially going emo guys

(Kinda wanna know Hongjoong's perspective)

the night we met (k.h.j.)

“i had all and then most of you, some and now none of you. i don't know what i'm supposed to do, haunted by the ghost of you. take me back to the night we met” — “the night we met” by lord huron {2015}

pairing: kim hongjoong x reader (no prns used)

genre: fluff, angst, est. rel, lovers to unrequited love

cw: /

wc: 1.2k

thank you to @yourfatherlucifer, rie (@pyeonghongrie) & cinny (@mochamvgz) for beta reading <3

©️ hotteoki || do not translate or repost on to any other platforms

the first time the doubt seeped in was 6 months ago. hongjoong had called to cancel your weekly date, apologising profusely over the phone, saying he would make it up to you; but that wasn’t what had set things off. it wasn’t uncommon for him to cancel during the morning of the date every now and then, you yourself would sometimes, whether it be too tired, or feeling sick, anything. it was him cancelling the next week that made you begin to worry. hongjoong is never one to cancel twice, always prioritising you over work. you had brushed it off, yet the unsettling feeling still lingers in the back of your mind. by the third time he cancelled, you confronted him, calling him after he sent a short text, saying ‘need to cancel, sorry’, only to be sent to voicemail. 

sighing to yourself, you knew there was no point in going to his studio, there were chances he went out with friends. when night came, you laid on the couch, trying your best to fight off the weight on your eyelids that were causing them to droop. upon hearing the door unlock, you sat up immediately, rubbing the drowsiness away in your eyes. “baby, have you been waiting for me?” hongjoong’s shocked voice travelling into your ears. “of course,” you smiled weakly, yawning, “i missed you.” “i’m sorry honey, i know i’ve been cancelling, but i thought you wouldn’t wait for me. i knew i was going to work late and i wanted you to sleep earlier,” he sat beside you, gently pushing your head into his lap, caressing your cheek gently. “i’ll always wait for you.” upon hearing that, he leaned down to kiss the crown of your head. “i love you, joong.” you were too tired to notice he never said it back.

it was thursday. you had finished classes earlier and went back to hongjoong’s apartment, hoping to visit him after not being able to see him for well over a week. you weren’t even surprised anymore when you opened the door to be met with an empty apartment. making your way over to his bedroom, you frowned upon seeing the door closed. he was never one to close his bedroom door. you slowly pushed it open and peeked your head through the doorframe, still holding on to the slim chance of him being inside, only to be met with disappointment upon seeing the light switched off. 

turning it on, your eyes widened at the sight of the messy state of his room. his desktop computer still sat by the corner of his desk, his chair swivelled a bit to the side (you smiled a bit at that, hongjoong was never one to tuck his chair back in, always complaining when it ends up getting in his way) the unmade bed, spare headphones discarded lazily on his bedside drawer, wastebasket filled with scrunched up paper balls. everything was as it should be.

you sat gingerly on his chair, spinning around a little, the turned-down picture frame next to his computer catching your eye. without even turning it back up, you already knew which picture it was, yet you stood it straight anyway, immediately met with three polaroids side by side in a row, taken on each of yours and hongjoong’s anniversary. you remembered getting a frame with him at a nearby local store, and sitting on his bed afterwards, him carefully pulling the three polaroids from his photo album and placing them into the frame, playfully arguing with you about how to place the order of the polaroids.

the polaroid of your second anniversary was first, the one on the far left. he had taken you roller skating, except neither of you were very good at it. you let out a small laugh at the memory of him falling and pulling you down with him. you also remembered being too scared to ask someone to take a polaroid of the two of you, needing him to ask for you, giving you a quick kiss on the cheek before doing so. 

the polaroid on the far right was your third anniversary. he had remembered you mentioning off-handedly about wanting to stargaze, and did exactly that. he had eagerly lead you to the han river after a nice dinner (which you insisted on paying for), pointing out random stars and blurting out random constellation names, making up their meanings. “you see that column of stars over there? it’s called the lobster constellation. it comes from the fact that lobsters hold hands in fish tanks, because they’re married for life, or something like that? i forgot what phoebe said,” he sounded unsure of himself, “and it basically means you should kiss me” you laughed at that, but kissed him anyway.

the one in the middle was your favourite one. it was also his favourite, you liked to think. it was your first anniversary with him. it was a selfie that hongjoong insisted would work, but ended up with the two of you being a little off centre with a stranger at the background, yet it was your favourite one, because both of you had the biggest smile on your faces, with his free arm wrapped tightly around your waist, holding to as close to him as possible. 

placing the picture frame down, you leaned back against the chair, feet accidentally kicking the wastebasket tucked underneath his desk, spilling the paper balls on the floor. sighing, you bent down to pick them up, halting when you realised you recognised exactly where the papers came from. hongjoong’s diary. the one you gifted him.

you tried to resist the urge to open one of them up to read it, only to give in, taking the nearest one and opening it up. you immediately stiffened up upon reading the date written in bold at the top. your one month anniversary. your breath hitched as you read through it. you would’ve appreciated all the sweet words he had written had your name not been crossed every time it was mentioned.

swallowing thickly, you picked up a few other ones in the wastebasket, opening them up as well. you felt your heart thumping faster and faster as you read more and more entries, all of them from significant dates in your relationship; the three month anniversary, one year anniversary, first christmas, second valentine’s day, third date— you shoved them all back in the basket. it was all too much to bear. 

you silently glanced around his room again. you felt haunted by the ghostly presence of him in his room, it was like he was right here, but also not at all. it just wasn’t fair. you ignored the growing ache in your chest. you ignored the tiny cracks on the glass of the picture frame, indicating he had thrown it around at some point. you ignored the half peeled off stickers you had stuck along the base of his keyboard. you ignored the beanie you gave him for his birthday last year carelessly shoved under his mattress. you ignored how the photos on his corkboard had pins going directly in between the two of you. 

you ignored how deep down, you knew hongjoong no longer loved you the same way he did. when it happened, or why, you had no idea, nor did you have the motivation to ask, knowing there was no point in asking questions you didn’t want answers to. but what you couldn’t ignore, was the longing feeling of wishing someone could take you back to the night you first met him, because even though this story would end the same way no matter how hard you tried to stop it, you’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.

taglist - @dikeu @weird-bookworm @asjkdk

networks - @kflixnet k-labels kbookshelf neverendingdreams-net straykidsland @k-films @pirateeznet

saw it coming but I still cried(fr this time)

apocalypse (c.s.)

“sleeping soundly with the locket that she gave you closed in your fist” — “apocalypse” by cigarettes after sex {2017}

pairing: choi san x fem reader

genre: fluff, angst, est. rel., college au

cw: /

wc: ~500

notes: a little different from my usual style of writing but i had to get this idea out

thank you to @ssaboala, @pyeonghongrie & @kookthief for beta reading <3

©️ hotteoki || do not translate or repost on to any other platforms

mingi had been san's flatmate for almost 4 years now, if you count the first year they spent together at the college dorms, and yet, he knew little to nothing about san's girlfriend. perhaps mingi had heard him mention your name once or twice, but there was never enough information about you for mingi to even picture your appearance. whenever he tried to ask, san would simply shake his head and change the topic.

it wasn't like mingi was one to invade san's privacy, but he was desperate to know more about the girl who san had been dating for 'longer than he's known him'. so mingi had set out a plan to find out just a little bit more about you.

he knew that every monday and thursday, at exactly 9:38, san would close his room door and spend at least 15 minutes in there writing a letter, before carrying on with his night afterwards; and the day after that, which would be either tuesday or friday, san would mail his letter to an unknown address to you. mingi also knew that san could not sleep until he has the heart-shaped locket, with supposedly a picture of you and him in it, clutched in his fist with the chain wrapped securely around his wrist.

what he couldn't understand, though, was the secrecy.

heck, mingi was in a long-term relationship himself and he was all too happy to tell san about it, so why couldn't san do the same with his relationship with you?

he had offered to drive san to mail his letter, claiming he was going to drive to school that morning and test out his new car, so might as well. san was reasonably skeptical about his intentions, but eventually agreed. as mingi reached to type in the location of the post office on his gps, san gently pushed his hand away, typing in an unfamiliar address.

"where-" "i think it's about time you meet her, anyway," san grinned, motioning to mingi to drive, and mingi complied.

as they rounded the corner, mingi was confused to hear the gps announce their arrival of their destination, and even more confused when san let himself out of the car, maneuvering his way around the oddly silent streets like he had done this countless of times before.

when san was slow enough, mingi snuck a look at the writings on the envelope with your letter inside. he faintly smiled upon reading the 'happy 6th anniversary!' with hearts drawn all around.

by the time they've reached the end of the road, mingi prepared himself for san to knock on the door of the last house. but he didn't. san kept leading mingi further, and further, and further, until the rows and rows of slabs came into view.

oh, how mingi wished he could stop his past self from being so nosy, how he wished he never offered the ride, how he wished he could take away the pained expression on san's face, how he wished he never had to live to see his best friend kneel on the ground, in front of a grave with thousands of letters stored in a clear box, all addressed to your name.

networks - @kflixnet k-labels kbookshelf neverendingdreams-net straykidsland @k-films @pirateeznet

idk man, if i don't get this man i might not get anyone at all🤷🏻‍♀️

𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞, 𝐢 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞. ˚｡୨୧˚

pairing: Lee Felix x GN!reader

genre: drabble, non!idol au, established relationship, fluff(?)

wc: 1k

warnings: lots and lots of kisses, suggestive, making out, language, pet names (honey, sweetheart, babe, lix)

summary: you have an amazing idea. the idea in question being a romantic tiktok trend that your boyfriend is over the moon about trying.

a/n: so...i was listening to cigarettes after sex and i remembered that one tiktok trend to k., and ik it's dead now but IT WON'T BE DEAD UNTIL I DO IT RAHHHH so here's me feeding you guys while the last two lovertober entries are being worked on

Felix knew something was up the second he stepped through your door.

You had texted him randomly, a cryptic message he'd stared at for an actual eternity (five minutes) attempting to decipher but ultimately giving up.

"come over. as soon as possible."

Were you in trouble? Did you want to fuck him? Was it both? He decided he should just go over to your apartment to see if you were okay. He slipped on his coat and left hurriedly.

You were on the couch, dozing off to some early 2000's movie you couldn't bother watching. When the door opening, you jolted out of the state you were in and turned to stare at Felix, a look of utmost delight upon your features.

"Hi, honey." You cooed, getting up from under the comfy blanket to snake your arms around his neck and press a loving peck to his plush lips. "You look lovely tonight."

Blood rushed to Felix's cheeks, turning them the color of blossoming pink roses. You were wearing his shirt and a pair of simple, black sleep shorts. Felix gulped, trying to fight the urge to pin you to the wall and kiss you until your lips were raw.

"What do you need? I saw you wanted me to come over quickly so I rushed here." Holy shit, he was a blabbering mess. You grinned.

"You know that one Cigarettes After Sex song, right?" you asked, plopping back down onto the couch and pulling out your phone.

"Very specific." Felix teased, hanging up his coat before awkwardly sitting down beside you. However, he relaxed once you leaned into him, your head resting on his shoulder.

"Hey! But it's called K., and it's that one where it goes like 'Stay with me, I don't want you to leave'..." you tried to explain, and Felix giggled.

"Yes, I know it. Did you call me all the way here for a song recommendation?" You shook your head, before zeroing in on the black, form-fitting turtleneck he'd been wearing beneath his heavy coat.

"Not really, no. There was this trend that was going around...I don't remember when, but every time I hear the song I think about it." You mused, gasping softly when one of Felix's arms made its way to wrap around your waist. Good god. "You look really hot in that turtleneck, by the way."

"Thank you, sweetheart." he laughed softly, pressing a kiss to your exposed neck. "Now, what was this trend about? I feel like I know what you're talking about..."

He knew exactly what you were talking about. To be honest, he was overjoyed you were even bringing up the idea to him. Being kissed all over by his partner sounded like the perfect Saturday night.

"I hope this jogs your memory, then!" You pulled up a video you had saved on TikTok, moving your phone over a little so that he could see it better. It showed some girl putting on lipstick, and messing it up. Then, a hand reached into the frame to wipe it away, and the camera panned to show her boyfriend, covered in lipstick marks and staring at her affectionately. "So...what do you think?"

Felix was staring in awe. Which pretty much answered your question.

"Please use that one burgundy lipstick you have. I'm begging you." He murmured quietly, still staring at the video on loop. You laughed out loud with glee, dashing off to go grab it.

Felix was waiting patiently, staring at the empty doorway as the distant sounds of you rummaging through your drawers excited him to no end. He just hoped he wouldn't get too excited...

When you finally came back, holding the tube of lipstick he loved so, he swore the butterflies flitting around inside his stomach began migrating. He changed the position he was sitting in so he could lay his back comfortably against the armrest of the sofa. Unfortunately, every one of his emotions were on full display as you climbed on top of him, straddling him.

"Wow, you're pretty red, Lix. I'm a little worried that the lipstick might not show up!" You slyly teased him, only adding more color to his adorable cheeks. He reached up to caress the soft skin on your cheek, his lips curled upwards into an endearing smile.

"Babe, I love you and your teasing but put on that makeup and fucking kiss me already." Felix grumbled playfully. You had no hesitation as you applied the dark lipstick, leaning down to press kiss after kiss onto his freckled face until his skin was stained red inside and out.

Felix felt like you were edging him.

You'd kissed everywhere except his lips, and it was making him feel embarrassingly needy. You noticed this, and with an airy giggle, you moved towards his lips. However, at the last second your head swiveled and you left a mark on the corner of his lips. That was his final straw. With a groan, he reached up and pulled you down so he could kiss you passionately, his hands going to your waist to steady you.

His kisses were dripping with love and adoration, fiery with desire. They slowly became more and more intimate, tongues dancing with each other. Your hands went to his blonde hair, holding them tightly. When you pulled away, a string of saliva connecting you to him like some otherworldly string of fate, your lips were swollen and his were the color of spilt red wine.

"You can't jus' leave me hanging like that, sweetheart. C'mon, get my neck too." He said, panting. His chest was heaving. You liked it.

"But you're wearing a turtleneck." You pointed out, blinking once, twice.

He grinned.

"Exactly. Go ahead, take it off of me." With his help, his expanse of tanned, bare skin was exposed to you. A perfect canvas to create art upon with your lovely lips.

Needless to say, you never finished filming.

@evermourning, ©2023. all rights reserved.

I WANT HIM! I NEED HIM! I WILL DIE W/O HIM!!!!

𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐬 ・l.f.

— "if you smell the same as someone, you will be less anxious. you'll have some peace of mind."

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬・1k 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠・felix x gn!reader 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞𝐬・hurt/comfort, established relationship 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬・detailed descriptions of an anxiety episode

𝐚/𝐧・ this was originally intended to be a timestamp but ended up becoming something way longer and heavier. based on this thing lix said in an ep of skz code and borrows a line from natsume souseki’s kokoro. i hope this can give u some solace; love u

When you slip into your side of the bed, Felix feels a touch of cool air from the duvet being lifted off the mattress, but it’s quickly nullified by your body’s warm pressure against his as you tuck yourself into his side. He looks at you, shrouded in one of his old hoodies, glasses halfway down the bridge of your nose, one hand patting down the blanket around your legs and the other holding your phone to your face as you scan over a text.

This is far from the first time you’ve spent the night at his place, and even further from the first time his anxiety has made itself known beyond just its ceaseless simmering beneath his skin. Yet, it is the first time the two events have happened in simultaneity, and he finds himself wondering if he should tell you about the unmistakable tightness pulling at his ribs or the winding coil waiting to snap behind his eyes.

An answer follows as quickly as the question surfaces, though. You haven’t been dating long, but in only three days short of six months Felix has learned that he could cut his heart open over your hands and you’d still find a way not to spill a drop of his blood. That is the extent to which your love makes him feel safe, secure, sacred; the extent to which he believes in your ability to protect his soul, even when it isn’t something unseen and external bombarding his defenses but the most familiar enemy of all. One that bears his name and wears his face.

“Baby,” Felix says, and your fingers still over your screen. As does your heart, when you see his quivering lips and unblinking eyes.

Your phone falls upon the blanket with a soft thud.

Scrawled all over the lines of your face is the worry that Felix was so reluctant to cause, but the way your eyes soften as you look at him now is a perfect replica of how they did that time you took him stargazing on the roof of your apartment building, and breathing becomes marginally easier right away.

“What’s happening?” You whisper, your fingers swift but so careful as they find and slide over his wrist. “How can I help, angel?”

Shakily, blindly, Felix’s hand chases yours under the sheets, and your palms have hardly touched before you’re completing his unspoken sentence. You lace your fingers with his, their pads fluttering against the back of his hand, and this gives him the strength to utter, to plead—

“Hold me?”

Your free hand moves to graze the curve of his cheekbone, then to hold his nape. Then, with a flourish of movement that Felix hardly registers, you lift yourself to straddle his lap and tighten your arm where it curls around his neck, drawing him so gently into your embrace that he can all but evanesce against you.

Time ceases to exist. What proceeds is simply warmth: your hands and mouth pressing life back into his body with every sweep through his hair and “I’ve got you” upon his ear; his face gone in the cluster of fabric that marks the beginning of your hood, his hand pushing beneath the heavy cotton to seek out your bare back, his breaths timed to the quiet heartbeat he finds there.

The two of you spend what feels like multiple lifetimes locked together in this fashion.

It is somewhere towards the end of life number three that Felix realizes, dimly, arbitrarily, that you don’t smell like anything.

You’ve always come with something, be it the aromatic remnants of your childhood home that you’ve never quite outgrown, the fragrance you always dab behind your ears before leaving the house, or the telltale shampoo-conditioner combination you’ve been using for years. But right now, there is no discernible scent attached to your skin or your clothes; no olfactory indications of your person, your presence.

This surprises Felix so thoroughly that it seals his windpipe closed for a few seconds. It’s as if he’s lost something he never realized was precious until only after it’s slipped from his grasp, and the notion nearly sends him on a new spiral entirely, nearly undoes the progress that you’ve so tenderly helped him make since settling upon his thighs.

But then you shift, and, in a manner reminiscent of brushing thick, tangled vines out of the way to read an ancient stone plaque, Felix skims the tip of his nose over the hollow of your throat, and it is there that he finds the subtle scents of you that he thought he’d forfeited. And his next realization not only pries his lungs open again but brings a much-needed rush of oxygen back into them.

It is his bodywash that you used in the shower and his garment that you slipped into right after drying off. It is his blanket that you’re currently folded together in and his dormitory that you’ve carried a spare key to for weeks now. It's his hands and lips that dote constantly on your neck and waist and shoulders and anywhere they can reach like poppies vying for homes in cracked cement.

It’s not that you don’t smell like anything. It’s that you smell like him. 

Like us.

Felix knows well that anxiety is too fickle a creature to ever leave for good, but when this thought occurs to him he senses the foul apparition waver for once.

He starts to unravel himself from you after life number seven, and you expel your relief in the form of a sigh when you pull away and see the faint smile on your boyfriend's face; sense the stable in, out of the chest your hands rest upon.

The puff of air is quickly sucked back in, though, when Felix presses his lips to the underside of your jaw; to the point of your chin; to the apple of your cheek; and, at last, directly to yours. The kiss begins tense and unmoving, still riddled with the tonnage of his burden, but then his hand cradles your face with all the ardor of thank you, and his tears taste like the words I love you when they land on your tongue.

And it is perfect, as is he.

🔖 (send an ask or reply to be added)・@astraystayyh・@like-a-diamondinthesky・@fire-08・@starsandrqindrops・@txtxlz・@laylasbunbunny・@strayghibli・@nuronhe・@seungminsapuppy・@vivisoni・@skzms・@moon0fthenight・@sweetpickledjins・@svintsandghosts・@nhyunn

𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤? please consider reblogging, commenting, or sending me an ask to let me know; or, read my other writing here. thanks so much for the support ♡

© 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐱 (est. 090323) · all works are pieces of original writing and all characters and relationships are purely fictional. please do not repost or reuse for any reason.

Guys if they dont start telling each other the truth, im throwing hands

My Biggest Regret

Part six.

**

"What’s going on you two?" She asked the two siblings standing infront of her. She was terrified at what she just hard. She was so disappointed in Hannah.

"Y/n I tried talking to him but his being so difficult about it," Hannah wiped the tears off her cheeks. She was crying.

"Look, both of you need to talk it out and we aren't going back in there until you do. You're not going to ruin this day for everyone else okay? I don't know what happened but please just sort it out. For me,"

Y/n's arms were crossed and she had a disappointed look on her face. The guilt ate up Hannah because she knew how much Y/n didn't like fights. She didn't like conflicts and she didn't like problems. She wanted everyone to be okay with one another. So Hannah accepted it and listened to Chan.

"Hannah, I know I missed a lot. I'm sorry okay? I'm sorry that I did but I couldn't come back and you knew that, no matter how much I tried to, management wouldn't allow it. Don't be mad at me. Please."

"I'm only letting this go because Y/n asked me to, so it's fine. I hope you enjoy your days in Australia."

Hannah shrugged and walked past Y/n giving her an apologetic look. She had forgiven Chan and that's what everyone wanted right?

"Hannah-" Chan called out for the younger but she was already back inside the house leaving Y/n and Chan standing outside speechless.

"Just give her time, she hasn't really soaked in everything," she tried comforting Chan.

"Yeah I guess," they both stood in silence. Waiting for one of them to speak up.

"I geuss I'll go back in-"

"No stay with me? Let's talk," Chan held her arm before she could go back inside the house. She agreed and sat down on the benches that were facing the sandy beach.

"So..How have you been?" He asked trying to start a conversation.

"Good, good and you?"

"I'm good,” he replied and looked over at her. Her skin was glowing under the moonlight and her eyes twinkled like the stars. He loved that.

“How are you? Like how has your medication and stuff been? Are you still ill?”

“Yes I am Chan,” she smiled and looked over at him. Both their eyes connect making her feel butterflies in her tummy, “I’ve been taking my medication, the tumor decreased and I’m probably going to need surgery,”

“Surgery?” He asked confused and worried.

“Yeah, sooner or later I was going to have it anyway so. It’s minimal though. So not a big deal,” she shrugged and continued to analyze his pretty face.

He made sure to note that down. He made sure to remind himself so that he could be there for her when she went in and out of surgery. He would have to do some convincing though.

“Oh okay, um..”

“Tell me all about stray Kids Channie! Tell me about South Korea! Do you like it over there? Is it nice? What do you guys do on a daily basis? Oh My God! Is it true that there is a library as big as the Dubai mall?” She gasped, her eyes went wide as she got more and more excited waiting for Chan to tell her all about his adventures and so he did.

He started talking about everything from the beginning till the end. He Ofcourse left out the parts of drugs and girls but he knew if he did tell her all about it she would end up heartbroken.

She listened. She paid close attention to everything. She made sure to ask questions and for a second it felt like they were back to their younger selves. Chan missed it. He missed this. He missed her. The conversation itself wanted to make Chan move back to Australia, back to his family. He felt so stupid for forgetting about her. He (for once) felt like a real human being and not a robot under watch.

“Chan?” She called after they had finished their conversation about South Korea and his new life.

“Yes Aya?” He replied.

“Did you forget about me?” Her eyes were now soft. A pang of guilt hit his chest so hard he had to take a deep breath. He didn’t want to lie anymore, he wanted to come clean so,

“No Ofcourse I didn’t, I waited for you,” Chan you liar, what were you thinking? The words rolled off his lips with a bitter taste. He couldn’t help but lie to her, she looked so innocent.

“Really Chan? I waited for you too! I haven’t fallen for anyone ever since you left,” her smile was big as she spoke. She was happy. But Chan on the other hand was questioning his existence. Did she really not fall in love with anyone when he was away? Surely it can’t be true it had been four years.

“Y/n, I’m sorry I got so busy and stopped checking in. I was scared you hated to me. I was scared that we weren’t close anymore so you didn’t need me. I hope you aren’t angry at me like Hannah,” his eyes glistened.

“Oh no, no, no,” she held his hands in hers hoping to give him some comfort, “I’m not angry, at first I was but I can never be angry at you Chan. I was the only that encouraged you to go remember? So don’t you ever think I hated you or I was angry at you,”

“But you were sick and-“

“Yes I was sick but I wasn’t dying,” Y/n you’re lying to him! “Plus look at how much you’ve grown! You’re a kpop idol! Not many people can say that they have successful idol bestfriends,” she joked causing a smile to crip up Chan’s face again.

“I love you,” he said casually.

“I love you too Channie,” she replied.

He leaned in slowly finding his face close to hers. She leaned in too, finding his face close to hers. Inches away. But Y/n was nervous. This would be her first kiss ever. She wanted to be perfect but she didn’t know how to make it perfect.

“Chan I-“

“Can I?” He softly asked. His hand laid on cheek. Her lips were so plump and pink. Chan craved it. Craved her. He was going to get close to her one way or another.

They both closed their eyes. Chan almost closing in the gap when,

“Guys dinners ready!” A voice called for both of them causing them to jump away from each-other.

They both looked over at the door to find Hyunjin standing there.

Proud of himself for ruining the moment. He was going to get Y/n because whatever Hyunjin wanted he would get even if it meant bringing Chan down.

**

Hey *insert a stack of money in my hands* , will you be my gf? 🤭🤭🤭

Don’t forget to reblog if you want to😋

-🩷

NO MUMU, YOU'RE NOT LETTING THAT TAYLOR SWIFT SONG GET TO YOU AGAIN

AGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

"You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset SHe's goin off about something that you said Cause' she doesn't get your humor like I do I'm in my room it's a typical tuesday night I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like She'll never know your story like I do"

⎯ PAPER PLANES a Kim Seungmin fiction

🛩️ : Kim Seungmin x gn. reader

TROPE. friends to lovers, neighbors to lovers, fluff fluff fluff galore

WORD COUNT. 1.5k!!

WARNINGS. cursing

AUG'S NOTES. still crazy about this concept💀 … i wrote this in 30 minutes in complete silence.. the demons have possessed me…

SYNOPSIS. Life in the city has never been as interesting as this. More specifically starting the moment your newest neighborhood, Kim Seungmin, moved in next door.

or alternatively :

It was only a matter of time before those paper airplanes turned into something more.

City nights are your greatest escapade and your worst nightmare. When insomnia plagues you awake, it’s easy to turn off all your fans and just listen.

New York isn’t called the city that never sleeps for no reason.

Whether it’s the faint honking of a car or the nearest nightclubs obnoxiously loud stereo, 24 hours a day almost every day of the year this city’s eyes remain open, and in essence, it makes you feel a tad bit better about those sleepless nights.

There’s the buzz of your surroundings, but as for your apartment complex, things are pretty quiet.

Well, you did intentionally choose a very much elderly-occupied residency after all.

Until somebody else showed up, somebody who didn’t explain to you on a morning basis of how they’re deciding on their casket.

And he sings.

Headed back from work up the elevator was when you ran into him for the first time. A smidge taller than yourself, puffy hair hanging over his forehead.

Neither of you talked apart from the courtesy “Which floor are you going to?” followed by an equally courteous “Five”, and you realizing you were both headed to the same place.

Elevators are a dangerous place. Anything could go wrong, technical issues, you end up trapped, weird strangers, and a myriad of unfortunate events waiting to happen. What’s worse? The conversations.

Because if there’s one thing you’ve learned from the decades worth of elevators you’ve been on is that they’re either a place to never stop talking or never talk.

As for this discovered neighbor of yours, you spend a solid thirty seconds deciding the right course of action.

“So where’d you move from?” You pique, watching the numbers atop the door slowly increase.

“South Korea,” He responds, and out of the corner of your eye you notice him glancing at you, hands stuffed in his puffer coat’s pockets.

Mouth opening to speak, you immediately close it, evidently surprised. To think how hellish the flight must’ve been humbled you instantly, not to mention how he carried no accent when conversing.

But before you could ask any more questions the doors open and he wordlessly slips past you, leaving you to silently follow.

“Wait!” Calling out prior to him walking through the door, he stops, turning to you with a confused expression adorning delicate features.

“What’s your name?” You voice another inquiry, hand also fastened onto the doorknob.

He blinks, the action scarily resembling a puppy dog.

“Seungmin. Kim Seungmin.”

Seungmin.

Cute.

“Y/n, nice to meet you.” Nodding politely his way, he returns the gesture, a sudden unwelcoming awkwardness creeping further into your skin the longer you both stand there, staring at each other.

And of course your genius of a mind decides to open its big fat mouth.

“..I guess we’re neighbors, huh.”

No shit sherlock, You internally reprimand, wishing oh so badly to leap out of the nearest window.

Sucking his teeth, Seungmin hums agreeably, and you feel like the stupidest person in the world.

“Yeah well, bye!” Panickedly twisted the knob and racing inside to slam the door behind you, you sink to the ground, clutching your head pathetically.

“Y/n…” You whine, addressing yourself like a lunatic. There’s a heavy sigh, a leaning your head back, thumping against the wooden frame.

“…What the fuck is wrong with you.”

Nonetheless, the night you first heard his voice pitch through gleaming neon signs was one to remember.

Typing manically on your keyboard while a half-empty glass of watered down coffee occupied the space beside you, you squint, scrutinizing that same sentence at least a dozen times before ripping the headphones off your ears and raising up frustratedly.

This essay is definitely earning a rightful spot on your thirteen reasons why list, a close second to your first impression on Seungmin last week.

Stretching your arms above your head, you hear it. An entrancing, melodic tone sifting beneath your cracked window, decorating your bedroom in a decadent assortment of color.

Carefully tiptoeing to pry open the window fully, you crane, cheek pressed against cold glass.

It’s Seungmin. Face tipped to the side, lips halfway parted. You don’t know if he’s focused on something or what, but you know he’s the only thing that matters in this moment.

His vibrato, the way he perfectly slices notes into harmonious rhythm pulls you in like a hummingbird to nectar.

You find yourself aimlessly standing there, rocking back and forth of your heels, savoring the effortlessly sweet relief he fills your exhausted soul with.

Day after day he’d sing, voice never ceasing to calm your senses, as if supernatural, into a lulling drone. No thoughts, just him.

Occasionally it’d be a new tune, one familiar, one not. Over and over and over again you’d routinely wait for him, like a child rushing to see their favorite cartoon.

And as a result, Seungmin became one of your biggest sources of comfort without either of you knowing it.

Today is the day.

Reaching over as far as you can muster with the makeshift paper airplane held tightly, you attempt at reading the wind, trying to decipher the best time to launch this secret weapon of yours.

Well, not really secret (somewhat), and also not a weapon, but you get the picture.

This morning you’d taken tedious measures to ensure your innovative paper airplane note would successfully fly, especially since the note inside was just as innovative.

𝙸 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚐. Was what it read, and you thought the compliment was pretty appropriate considering how often you’d admire his mellowed tunes in the eve.

Except, the first one was a fail, then the second one, and a third, and by the forth airplane you had paper-cuts all over your hands and a temper teetering on the brink of defeat.

Hey, at least three people today (almost four) would get a “I like your singing” note today.

Whoosh! Your note flies, and just when you begin to lose hope does it switch trajectories, successfully hitting his balcony’s screen door.

To say you shouted was an understatement. Hell, the entirety of New York likely heard your chanting, yelling, and the entourage of oddly proud noises in between.

Noises of which were quickly muted upon said screen door opening, to where you frantically drop down, peering between the chair’s legs to observe his reaction.

Seungmin glances around repeatedly, curiously, prior to peeling back paper folds.

You inhale sharply.

His eyes graze over the sentence, investigating his surroundings again.

No reaction.

You initially deflate, grumbling to yourself defeatedly.

Until a tiny sliver of hope peeks through dark curtains.

Seungmin smiles.

He covers his mouth (an action you don’t understand but start to considering how dazzlingly bright it is), and laughs. A soft laugh that has his shoulders shaking, corner of his eyes wrinkling into charming crescent moons.

You swear there’s a ring of sparkling light outlining him, like something out of a K-Drama.

His smile could (and should) win an award, you’re convinced.

And just like that he disappears back into his apartment, and you chant a nonstop “Oh my god!” a good thirty-six times, unable to contain the feather-light feeling spreading from your fingertips to the very tip of your toes.

Cute. Kim Seungmin was so, so cute.

From the sheepish grins he gives you each time he’s seen you since, you have a hunch he knows it was you who sent the note, but you choose to act oblivious.

Oblivious, before you received a note of your own.

Of course, Kim Seungmin’s paper airplane is perfect, aerodynamic and probably arrived on the first throw unlike your consecutive sacrifices.

Slowly shuffling open the response, you peek through hesitant fingers, slapping a hand over your gaping mouth upon witnessing his obviously perfect handwriting.

𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞 :) , It reads. Something so mundane and proper there’s no reason you should be losing your mind, but you are, and the rattling of your heartbeat serves the best explanation.

You make sure to hang the note up afterward, right above your laptop.

So over the next few days, the both of you become more daring, more adventurous. Two paper airplanes turn into four, four to eight, eight to eleven. By now there’s not enough room to hang all of them up.

Meaningless conversations. Asking about dinner plans, what you’re currently doing, what your favorite hobbies are, favorite songs. But yet, they mean so much to you.

Your own, childish way of communicating even though the mature, adult reply would be to knock on his door.

Although, he seems to love it as much as you do.

𝙰𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚋𝚞𝚜𝚢 𝚝𝚘𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝? Is scribbled on the airplane he’d sent a few minutes ago.

𝙽𝚘, 𝚠𝚑𝚢? You write quickly onto one, hands nimbly constructing the shape after sending so many. Routine.

Returning to stirring the pot of boiling water in front of you, a familiar tap alerts you, padding over to grasp his letter.

Strangely, a part of you grows more and more excited, plopping down into your chair to gradually take apart his craftsmanship.

Your legs move before you can even register your own feelings, scrambling outside.

Seungmin’s there, breathtaking smile as brilliant as ever despite such dim lighting.

There’s no need to admit you’ve been sending them now. Especially not from the way he gazed at you, the words inscribed on that paper airplane.

𝙲𝚊𝚗 𝙸 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚘𝚗 𝚊 𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚝𝚘𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝?

He bites back an even bigger grin, cheeks dusting rosy pink from the cold air.

Yes.

Absolutely yes.

sunboki, may 2022 ©