Mysme 707 - Tumblr Posts - Page 2
RFA + Saeran with MC with depression
these depression symptoms are based solely on my personal experience with depression. everyone experiences things differently if you or someone you love is going through depression no matter what symptoms they show or don’t show, they deserve love, compassion, and help. it does get better. help is out there and worth the effort. you aren’t alone.
Also my depression is almost entirely biochemical, meaning that when I’m on my medicine my depression is generally controlled very easily. This is why medication plays such a major role in these head cannons. Everyone’s depression treatment is different some people benefit more from counseling than medication. Some people require hospitalization some need tender in home care. Find what works for you and stick with it. I promise, it’s worth it.
Jumin
- his approach is diligence.
- he was so busy he didn’t notice at first
- it was when the maid contacted him to ask if MC was okay that he started to pay attention
- the maid had mentioned the MC had been in bed when she came to clean the last three days
- Jumin knew MC wasn’t lazy far from it actually if she wasn’t busying herself with one of her many hobbies or planning the next RFA party she was usually visiting a friend not lying in bed.
- something was wrong. he came home right away to check on her
- she was surprised and apologized profusely as though she had been caught doing something wrong
- “love I’m not angry, I’m worried.” she smiled lightly and assured him she was fine just tired recently
- so Jumin watched closer, noticed more
- he saw her eat less, sleep more, her knitting didn’t progress, nor did her reading or writing. the party planning came along but even it seemed to go slower.
- it was when she started to leave sentences hanging that he put his foot down
- “honey bunny really, please. I don’t need a doctor.”
- “you aren’t yourself love. you don’t even talk to me anymore”
- “we, we talk.”
- “no I talk you listen. I miss you. your right beside me but you feel so far away”
- “I probably just need my medicine”
- “medicine. you didn’t tell me you take medicine! medicine for what are you okay?!?”
- “I, I didn’t want to worry you! It’s not a big deal honestly I shouldn’t even need it. it’s so stupid. I take an anti-depressant or I’m supposed to. it’s hard to remember sometimes and I forget.
- in an instant Jumin was hugging her carding his fingers through her hair holding her tighter than he had ever held anyone
- “bring me your medicine. you’re taking it right now. from now on I won’t let you forget”
- he came to bed every night with a glass of water and MC’s medicine.
- he found support groups, funded research, sought out the best counselors and psychologists.
- he hated that he couldn’t immediately fix the problem but if he couldn’t cure her then he would get her the best treatment money could buy
Yoosung
- his approach is overprotective.
- he first noticed how restless MC was. she would switch videos before they started, change apps before one had even finished loading.
- “MC are you okay?” but she assured him she was
- next he noticed that she wasn’t leaving the house as often, she didn't leave to see her friends and she hadn’t called her family in weeks. messages and texts would either be ignored or answered with single word replies.
- even their conversations seemed far more one sided
- something was off so he asked for help.
- the chatroom was abuzz with worry about MC and Yoosung couldn’t keep up with all the advice
- then he got a call. from V
- V worried that MC might be depressed offered to give yoosung some numbers to call, doctors to see.
- yoosung hung up and confronted MC immediately angry & scared
- “is it true? why didn't you tell me?”
- “it’s not bad really. most of the time I just need my medicine and I’m fine but,”
- “but what”
- mc see blinked back tears “I, I lost them in the move and I can’t get more till the end of the month. i thought, I thought I could make it but I’m so tired Yoosung”
- he didn’t know what to say so he just held her. he stayed holding her all night”
- the next morning, he helped her search the whole apartment and when they still couldn't find them they went to the pharmacy together to explain the situation
- yoosung watched her carefully for weeks’ afterword to make sure she was okay
- too anyone else he would have seemed paranoid but MC knew why he was so carful
- he was shook after rika and wasn't going to take any chances with her
Saeyoung
- his approach is patient.
- he knew the signs already
- heck he had lived them
- so when he noticed MC’s jokes had taken a darker turn he decided to watch her closer
- and he saw it, saw her slowly slip into the habits he had seen so many times in the mirror.
- so he did what he could. He held her when she shut down.
- sought her out when she would hide
- more often than not he simply sat in the room with her like she had with him. Sat near her so that when she felt like talking he would be there
- after days of sitting next to her as waiting for her to reach out it happened
- “I’m not okay”
- this was progress since for days she had insisted that she was fine and simply just tired
- “what do you need” he asked gently intertwining their fingers
- “will you help me get my medicine. I ran out. I don’t know when I was supposed to get the refill”
- this was something he could do and he would do anything for her
- it does sooth his conscience a bit too know this was something she struggled with before meeting him and not because of him
Zen
- His approach is by far the gentlest
- The first thing he noticed was her sleep.
- She tossed and turned when before she would happily snuggle into his arms and stay there happily all night
- Then he noticed her smile seemed more forced than before
- She didn’t cry much but she also didn’t laugh like she had before
- When she started having trouble falling asleep he sang her lullabies
- When she started eating less he started learning to cook
- When she left in the middle of his play and hid in the theater bathroom. He asked for answers.
- Gently trying to coax her out of the bathroom to talk to him
- The second the door is open he’s inside and holding her. She sits in his lap and cries for the first time
- He sings to her gently and helps calm her down until her breathing evens out and she can talk
- “I’m just so tired. I’m tired of everything Zen. I want to go home. Even when I’m home I want to go home I know it doesn’t make sense. I know. I’m just, I’m so tired”
- He holds her tight telling her that it’s okay. That he’ll fix it.
- Once she’s asleep he’s calling Jaehee. She’s smart and if anyone could find the help MC needs it’s her
Jaehee
- Her approach is slightly clinical
- The first thing she notices is MC skips movie night
- Then she sees her sleep in and skip a lot of her self-care
- MC is still working as hard as ever but she’s exhausted all the time
- She’s worried and when MC refuses to go to the doctor she does the research herself
- Then she confronts MC too ask if her guess is right
- when MC admits to getting off her meds jaehee goes rigid
- jaehee is worried. everything about this feels uncertain and she hates feeling uncertain
- So Jaehee does what she does best.
- She plans. She learns. She works.
- She knows the medication and how it works.
- She sets up an entire routine for MC taking her medicine and doing all the self-care things that are supposed to help
- She insists that MC see a councilor since she admits emotions aren’t her strong suit.
Saeran
- His first tip-off is when she forgets to refresh the water in the flower vases
- The second is when she skips walks in favor of staying in bed
- It feels like he’s losing her and its making him panic a bit
- he sees how lifeless her eyes are when he tells about the newest garden blooms
- she’s not her positive happy go lucky self anymore
- he hates it when she smiles and it looks so broken
- he makes her a bowl of ice-cream and she only eats a fourth of it
- he’s getting worried and trusting relationships are pretty new to him
- but secrecy and information hacking aren’t so that’s what he goes back to
- he finds your medical records and see’s you have an expired prescription for anti-depressants
- he confronts you angrily and questions what’s wrong with you
- how can you expect him to get treatment when you won’t even take your medicine
- you explain that you were on your way to get your meds when you got called to mint eye
- and then in all the chaos you forgot, and at this point you’d have to see your doctor again
- your tired it doesn’t seem worth it
- he looks guilty and ashamed but you pull him into your arms
- he apologizes for everything with mint eye again and you can feel him shaking
- you assure him it isn’t his fault, it was bad circumstances and bad timing not him
- he makes you promise to go to the doctor you make him promise to go with you
- you could do anything together after all
- he wants you happy if you need this medicine then he wants you to have it
RFA that comes home to MC that has filled the bed with stuffed animals
Jumin He’s confused, and ends up moving the stuffed animals so he can replace them.
- He had come home a day early but it was still late at night when he trudged through the penthouse door
- He was quiet, careful not to wake you up since you weren’t expecting him until tomorrow evening.
- He wanted to surprise you when you woke up in his arms but when he got to the bedroom the bed looked, full
- The shapes under the covers where chaotic and even after staring for several minutes trying to piece together what each shape might be he couldn’t begin to guess.
- He stepped closer silently to investigate. He could hear your soft breath but the closer he got the more he realized he couldn’t even see your form clearly in the haphazard mess on the bed
- “MC” he ventured quietly pulling the blankets down to reveal a jumbled mess of pillows and assorted stuffed animals
- He recognized some of the colorful plushies from gifts he had given you and others from when you had moved in.
- though normally they were meticulously displayed in your hobby room, organized by categories he couldn’t begin to understand though you had tried to explain several times
- after delicately removing one after another he found you buried beneath them wrapped in a heated blanket and hugging his personal favorite stuffed animal gift to you.
- A pure white cat plush with sapphire eyes. Elizabeth the 3rd immortalized in soft faux fur and stuffing
- You yawned gently and sat up before you registered what had woken you then you locked eyes with him
- “darling!!” you cried scrambling toward him through the see of pillows and stuffed animals
- At the edge of the bed though you lost your traction slipping and tumbling into his chest where he caught you easily you snuggled into his chest and hummed happily as he chuckled again
- “I thought you might miss me, but it looks like my place in our bed has been taken” he said gently patting you head
- “oh um well. It’s silly but to be honest. I can’t sleep when you’re not here. The beds to big, too empty and cold. So I fill it with all my cuddly stuffed animals and wrap myself in a heated blanket so that I can pretend you’re still here.” You mutter growing quieter with every word
- When you met his gaze again you could see something dancing behind his eyes as he smiled gently at you
- In a second your lips where caught in a tender kiss
- “my love. You should have told me my absence pained you so. But if you’d like I could take my place back”
- “yes please darling. I’ve missed you”
Yoosung He does the exact same thing no doubt. Meaning he just joins you in the cuddle pile
- Yoosung had been visiting his parents for the past few days after learning that his sister was pregnant
- He had asked MC to come with him but she couldn’t get off work so she stayed behind
- Yoosung was exhausted when he stumbled into your shared apartment.
- The darkness told him you were asleep so he made his way to the bedroom
- He fell against the bed without paying attention and was surprised by the mass of stuffed animals that cushioned his fall
- Still tired he wiggled his way to the bed through the plush mountain only to hear you groans and roll over in your sleep toppling some of the more precariously placed plushie’s
- Yoosung was already starting to does off when his arm found you cuddling with one of his LOLOL stuffed dolls
- He chuckled sleepily pulling you close to him doll and all
- He pressed his forehead against yours the plush squeezed between you
- You could hear his chuckle when you sleepily tried to kiss him good night
- Your lips landing gently on his closed eyelid
- The next morning you two woke up under a pile of soft plush and you giggled as you watched him try and fail to get out of the bed without knocking off all the toys you both adored
- When he tumbled free from the plush prison landing on the floor with a soft thud you tossed a small pusheen pillow at his head
- He responds by catching your wrist and pulling you down to the floor with him
- You fall on top of him and his cheeks tint a soft pink you can’t help but kiss
Saeyoung He thinks it’s cute but absolutely makes jokes about the stuffed animals stealing his girl
- Seven snuck through the bedroom door gently
- Totally not planning on scaring his girlfriend after getting back from a mission
- That would be mean, and hilarious
- He crept along the floor till he got to the bed where he peeked over the edge and came face to face with a plush long cat
- His eyes lit up with a maniacal plan as he sprung up
- He flung the sheets of the bed and hit the lights
- “how could you!?!?” he cried dramatically
- You screamed and flailed for a moment at the outburst
- “what? Who? Seven?” you asked blearily, confused and lost in the space between dreams and reality
- “LONG CAT? MC?”
- “long cat. Yeah long cat. What?” you asked again rubbing your eye’s
- “YOUR CHEATING ON ME WITH LONG CAT?!?”
- You squinted toward saeyoung trying to process what he had said
- He tried to keep a straight face desperately as you sat in silence connecting the dots of what he had said
- Suddenly it made sense he was messing with you. He had come home early. He saw you snuggling with the long cat body pillow you two shared. Jokes. Late night jokes
- It took you entirely too long to connect everything but once you had you smirked
- “yes! Yes saeyoung its long cat its always been long cat” you wailed clutching long cat to your side as saeyoung crawled atop the bed in mock anger
- “is saeran even mine?! MC?” he demanded
- “no. saeran’s real father, is long cat” you wailed again throwing your arm over your face as you fell back against the bed as though you were in a bad soap opera.
- “SHUT UP ITS THREE IN THE GODDAMN MORNING” saerans angry voice echoed through the house as you both burst into a fit of giggles while hugging each other
- “I missed you” you muttered after calming down “long cat just doesn’t cut it”
Zen The beast is unleashed it’s just too cute but he is a gentleman he will not wake her up. On purpose.
- Zen had finally made it home after his first away photo shoot
- He tiptoed into the bedroom to join MC for some much needed rest when his heart stopped.
- You where curled tightly around a small plush version of him you had found on etsy.
- He couldn’t breathe. He swore he had died and gone to heaven.
- How in the world did you manage to look so small and cute in your sleep?
- Were you wearing one of his shirts? This absolutely was not fair.
- You were asleep. He chastised himself. He was a gentleman and would not wake up his girlfriend in the middle of the night for something so indecent.
- There was a flash and a shutter sound
- He stopped surprised by himself how could he have taken a picture without even realizing it.
- And now you where stirring.
- He had woken you up despite all the self-control he had sworn he had.
- You were rubbing your eyes sleepily and muttering “Zenny?”
- Then the beast is unleashed
- He tried. He really really did.
- You both sleep in the next day because you are both exhausted
Jeahee She’s concerned about you being sore. Stuffed animals don’t exactly make for the best bed no matter how soft they are
- When she came to bed she was surprised by the sheer amount of stuffed animals there were
- You had at least four in your arms alone and two under your head where your pillow should be
- She gently shook your shoulder.
- “mc? mc? your necks going to hurt if you sleep like that”
- You groaned and pulled her into bed next to you she laughed gently at your response
- “mc you still have to move or you’ll be sore in the morning”
- You groaned again and shifted so your head was on her shoulder before reaching behind you and feeling for the pillow you’d lost
- She sat up and reached across you to pull the pillow around
- You hummed your appreciation and pushed several of the stuffed animals off the bed for her to lay down comfortably
- She used a hand to signal you to raise your head and as you did you kissed her nose
- She blushed a bit but settled down beside you none the less a content smile on her face
The RFA reacting to MC texting them saying “I’m 110% sad”
so real talk I’m like 110% sad right now. its just a bad day I know and Ill feel better tomorrow. some days are just like that. but i could use some comfort so i wrote some comfort fluff. I hope it brings all of you some comfort too.
Jumin
- Leaves you on read
- Rushes home instead of reply
- Let’s you sit on his lap
- The instant his arms are around you, you suddenly feel safe/loved enough to cry
- He hold you close gently rocking you
- Doesn’t say anything just holds you until you fall asleep
- Literally will not let you go
- will read to you if you need to be distracted
- gets Elizabeth to sit on your lap while you sit on his lap
- lap-ception
- kisses your head
- and your nose and your cheek and literally just all over kisses
- The next day is searching for what made you sad
- It will not get away with that
- He will fire, sue, trash or punch anyone and anything that makes you sad
- And if nothing made you sad and it was just a sad day
- Well then he will do everything in his power to make the next day twice as happy
Yoosung
- Why? What happened? Do you need me? Class is almost over? Should I leave now? MC?
- Rapid fire short texts you can’t respond to fast enough
- Is at your side way too early for him to have finished class
- He brought you your favorite food.
- Turns on funny animal videos and cuddles with you
- Probably plays with your hair
- Asks if you want to talk about it and listens intently
- Really really wants to help
- Ends up crying
- You weren’t crying until you saw him cry
- Tells you how much he loves you through the tears
- You two fall asleep on the couch cuddling
- You wake up in the middle of the night and shake him awake so you can move to the bed
- In an instant he’s asking if you feel better and making sure you aren’t sore from sleeping on the couch
Saeyoung
- Texts you a video of him blowing you a kiss dramatically
- Tries to cheer you up with jokes and memes
- If you tell him, you really aren’t up for jokes right now he’ll switch gears completely
- He gets that sometimes it’s not joke time
- Listens and sincerely tries to help be it advice or working his magic to fix it
- Takes you for a drive
- Truly believes in the power of loud music and high speeds
- Rolls down the windows and tries not to stare at how beautiful you look with the wind in your hair
- He takes you to one of his secret spots to help you escape from everything
- When you feel well enough to make a joke he is so relived and jokes back
- And then your crying and laughing and he has to admit this is better than the numb and lifeless look you had before
- He loves you
Zen
- He is calling you instantly
- “do you need me? I can leave if you need me?”
- Sings you the cutie pie song
- Is legitimately concerned when he doesn’t hear you giggle when you thank him
- He is on his way home before you can assure him your fine
- Once he’s home he’s ushering you out the door and onto his bike
- He takes you to his special spot in the mountains
- He explains that being in nature helps him when he’s sad so he hopes it helps you too
- Pulls out goldfish shaped bread for you two to share
- You lean against him and he kisses the side of your head
- You two stay their till night fall so you can star gaze
- He drapes his coat over you and suddenly your crying
- Burying your face in his chest and shaking as he holds you
- He tells you that he’s so thankful that of all the times he could have lived in of all the places he could have been of all the lives he could have lived he got this one
- He assures you that if he had to do it all again he wouldn’t change a thing because everything led him to holding you in his arms
- You can feel yourself giggle a little at how cheesy he is
- And he’s just relieved to see your smile even if it’s still muddled by tears
- Once you calm down you and he head back home to rest
Jaehee
- She’s worried
- She wants to help but doesn’t know how to
- She makes your favorite desert
- Puts in your favorite Zen dvd
- Covers you in a blanket and tells you, you can talk if you want but you don’t have to
- When she’s sad Zen makes her feel better so she’s showing you all her Zen stuff hoping it’ll help you too
- but you’re just staring ahead
- you aren’t even singing along to the musical number like you usually do (even when she asks you not to)
- so cautiously she pulls you against her in a gentle side hug
- and now your sniffling and shaking and she’s absolutely sure it’s her fault
- so she pulls away like she’s been burned
- but you have her shirt and are pulling her back because really you need the hug right now
- she’s hesitant but she hugs you again and you spend the evening crying on her shoulder
- she kisses your head once she feels you stop shaking
- but you don’t respond
- so she checks closer only to find you sleeping against her
- she carries you to bed and whispers softly
- “I love you MC.”
RFA and how MC gets them to sleep
I hope ya’ll enjoy these. do I need to make a masterpost? since I’ve got a couple of these now I don’t know. their all pretty recent so maybe its not necessary.
Jumin
- You’ve gotten it down to a science at this point
- “darling? I can’t sleep.” You call from the door way of his home office “do you mind reading to me? Like you did that first night?” that’s what gets him the mention of your first night with him.
- “I, of course dearest” he says wearily placing a stack of papers to the side “just until you fall asleep though I do need to finish this”
- You frowned a little at that. He hadn’t slept much these past weeks and when he did it was fitful and short lived. Tonight he would sleep. You would be sure of that.
- “would you sit in bed with me? Just for a while? The bed is too big and cold for me to fall asleep without you.”
- “you have plenty of blankets my love” he said narrowing his eye’s at you suspiciously
- “it’s not about the blankets. I don’t love the blankets. I love you” then you saw it in his eye’s warmth, love and the tell tail signs of his resolve crumbling as he gave into your request. You didn’t like using his love for you like this but he had to sleep.
- “I really can’t say no to you my love” he sighed following you towards the king sized bed you shared
- “thank you honey bunny” you said pulling him to lay beside you leaning him against a pile of pillows so he was reclining enough to sleep comfortably but upright enough to read. Where he not so fatigued he may have questioned how you had planned it all so perfectly.
- You handed him the book you two where currently reading and situated yourself against his chest humming happily
- One chapter later and you could feel him running his fingers through your hair trying to see if you were awake
- You stayed still careful to count your breath to keep it deep and slow
- He sighed and settled himself a little before resigning to stay rather than wake you by leaving
- After fifteen minutes you could hear his gentle and quite snores
- Success.
- The next morning you woke early and shut off his alarm before calling Jaehee
- “mission accomplished Jaehee” you say smirking “he wont be in today but tomorrow he’ll be back to tip top shape”
- “thank you MC. when he pushes himself this hard it often falls to me to fix the things his fatigue lets fall through the cracks. One day of rest saves us weeks of mistakes”
- “a stitch in time saves nine as they say. Oh but I have to go if I’m not there when he wakes up he’ll try to go back to work”
- “of course, and again thank you MC.”
Yoosung
- Honestly if you could just get him into bed you knew he would be out like a light
- It was getting him to the bed that was difficult
- So you played the last card in you deck, the ace.
- “yoosungie? I’m going to shower and get ready for bed okay?”
- “sounds good!”
- “unless, maybe you wanted to join me?”
- “jo- join you?” he spluttered turning away from his computer wide eyed and beet red
- “well I thought, it might save time, and water and it might be fun.” With a wink you turned towards the bathroom where you already had everything prepared
- Honestly the shared shower was simply a bonus to your plan
- Call the fun times you shared a happy consequence of the plan.
- You washed his hair with lavender scented shampoo to help you both relax and calm down
- And on the way out you hand him the pajamas you had prepared
- “you planned this”
- “of course I planned this” you chuckled kissing his forehead “noona takes care of her puppy”
- You could see his face darken and feel the shiver that ran down his spine at that and you couldn’t help the laugh that escaped your lips at the way his eye’s seemed to cloud for a fraction of a second
- You pressed a quick kiss to his lips before pulling him to the bedroom where you sat him on the bed to towel dry his hair a bit more
- “I love you” he whispers and you smiled gently at him. Pulling the towel off his head you pulled him against you “I love you too”
- Laughing you pulled him to lay beside you before leaning over him to reach across the bed and turn off the bedside lamp
- With on last kiss on his nose you bid him goodnight computer game forgotten in haze of showers and cuddles (amongst other activities)
Saeyoung
- He knows what you’re up to.
- But you’re wearing the cute cat pajamas he had bought you.
- and you had completely designed your bed time routine around tempting him to bed
- he had never even heard of bedtime yoga before you moved in
- yet there you where contorted beside the bed showing of how flexible you could be and occasionally smirking into the camera you knew he was watching
- so it wasn’t long before he found himself making his way to the bedroom
- “ready for bed secret agent man?” you quipped and couldn’t help a smirk as you saw his face tint a slight pink
- “are you kitten me?” he shot back and you had to cover your moth to stop the giggles
- “come on I’ve even got my paw-jamas on” you manage through your giggles
- “you’re doing this on purr-pose aren’t you?”
- “guess the cats out of the bag how’d you know?”
- “just a feline” both of your where lost in a fit of laughter at that point
- you pulled him to the bed and made note of the dark circles under his eyes as you pulled a heavy weighted blanket over you both before snuggling up next to him
- he had insisted he didn’t need it. “I don’t have anxiety, MC” he had said.
- Next day shipping and an extra good night of sleep later he admitted the weight was comforting
- Your rans your fingers through his hair and mumbled quietly to him about your day.
- You had found that the quiet talk down helped him relax as he curled into your chest
- This was the only time you ever saw him this small
- Wondered if it was a product of his childhood that he disliked sleeping so much
- Still you held him close and played with his hair absently as you recounted the story of meeting a stray cat on the way home
- After a while you ran out of stories and moved on to trying new jokes searching for the ones that drew sleepy chuckles from his lips
- Lulling him to sleep was simple enough. The hard part came after
- Falling asleep without waking him up was always a struggle
- He was a notoriously light sleeper
- One wrong move or strange noise had him jolting upright and alert
- Once you had startled him awake with nothing more than a yawn
- Perhaps it was his training that had him on such high alert.
- You hoped that slowly but surely he would learn to relax a bit more but you understood it could take years if it happened at all
Zen
- He knows he should sleep
- He just can’t some times
- He’ll lie awake for hours if you don’t help him relax
- On these nights you two have settled into a routine
- You make him tea and brush his hair
- “you know you don’t have to do that jagiya”
- “I enjoy it your hair is always so soft!”
- “are you jealous?”
- “I would be if you weren’t my boyfriend. That’s the thing though your MY boyfriend meaning technically your mine and by extension your hair is mine”
- “is that how it works?”
- You lean down and kiss the top of his head
- “yep that’s how it works”
- “does that mean your mine too”
- “always and forever”
- “your so cute jagi!
- After tea you both go through your nightly routines washing your face and getting ready for bed
- On good night you share a bath
- You lean against his chest and lay your head back on his shoulders while you both do a face mask
- in bed you ask him to sing you a lullaby as you gently trace patterns into his chest
- You hum along contentedly and smile when he yawns
- After while his singing drifts off and you can hear his breath get deeper
- he can sleep through quite a bit but you know that the second you pull away from him he’ll be up in a second looking for the warmth and weight of you
- so you pull the blankets tighter around the both of you and slip into sleep yourself
Jaehee
- you got to start early with Jaehee
- no caffeine after noon or it’s a lost cause
- after opening the café this got 1000% harder
- you lure her away from work by offering to watch a Zen DVD with her
- you pull her against you on the couch and hum along with the music quietly (she hates it if you sing along but humming is fine)
- slowly she starts to relax against your chest and you know it’s time to move upstairs (wink wink. Wait no. you both need rest save the winks for next time)
- “Jaehee?” you ask gently “how bout we head to bed? We have to open early tomorrow”
- She yawns bit but you can see the defiance in her eye’s
- “I should finish a couple more things before”
- “no” you say sternly pulling her toward the bedroom
- “but there’s still paperwork”
- “and it will still be there in the morning. Look ill work the morning by myself so you can take care of it then but you need sleep”
- She sighs but fallows you none the less
- “your right MC.”
- “it happens sometimes” you laugh winking at her and reveling in her averted eye’s and blushing cheeks
- (wink wink? No just one wink. You still need rest)
- Once in bed you snuggle together and just before drifting off you hear her mumble
- “I’m so glad we’re friend” “I’m so lucky to have you”
so my depression has been acting up lately >.> like the asshat it is meaning writing has become ... difficult at best and impossible at worst
so here i am formally requesting that everyone consider a heartbreaking alternate AU to the reset theroy where saeyoung simply experiences hallucinations and delusions that lead him to believe he has watched the love of his life fall for and marry all the other RFA members and reset multiple times
even on medicine when he no longer believes she’s actively lived out separate lives he can get insecure about the possibility of losing her to a reset
yah
just a thought take it use it write it draw it do whatever y’all want with it just idk tag me so i can read it when i start feeling like myself again
look okay i was sad and i can’t write angst but damn you can and you nailed it you ripped my heart out and river dance stomped it to death. I loved every minute. i regret nothing
Reset?
Fandom: Mystic Messenger
Relationship: 707/Luciel Choi/Saeyoung Choi x MC, (Implied other pairings)
Characters: 707/Luciel Choi/Saeyoung Choi, Yoosung Kim, Zen/Hyun Ryu, Jumin Han MC, Unknown/Saeran Choi, Jaehee Kang
Additional Tags: 707 reset hallucinations, Angst cause why not, what's going on? you tell me
Notes: Blame @joy1579 for this
Saeyoung didn't know when it started, but it persisted. The hallucinations. The nightmares. Waking up without MC in his arms then suddenly feeling her hair tickle his neck.
It happened without warning. Watching MC kiss Jumin at the Christmas party only to blink, finding his hand casually held in her own. Blinking again for his ears to pick up her chatter about decorations instead of whispered sweet nothings and giggles under the mistletoe.
MC playing with Zen's hair in the shade of a tree. Matching sets of adoring eyes meeting then darting away at Yoosung's graduation. All this to wake up or blink or yawn and see her beside him, sense her hand idly tracing the lines of his palm, and feel shame in his veins. Shame for the jealousy her felt towards his closest friends. Shame for MC's constant reassurances that he is more than enough and not believing it himself. Shame for being unable to stop what was happening to him.
The next "reset" happened at a coffee shop where he swore Jaehee was the cashier.
Another reset, playfully dodging Zen's kisses as she booked his next audition.
Reset. An extravagant wedding. Jumin standing tall at the alter, sweeping MC into a kiss.
Reset. MC broadcasting live with his brother. Their hands clasped firmly in defiance.
MC and V... STOP!
Reset.
Reset.
Tripping down the stairs of Rika's apartment building. Chasing her. Watching her leave. Knowing this wasn't the first time.
Reset.
She pulled out her phone and opened the door, "I'll be back. I just need to save him!"
Reset.
"It's the last time. She needs my help, if not for herself then for Yoosung."
RESET.
RESET.
"Saeyoung! Are you okay?"
She hovered over him, holding onto his shoulders tightly.
Saeyoung reached up and pushed back her bangs. Tiredly searching for answers in her hazel eyes, "Please don't leave me again."
Her gaze softened, "I never left."
Saeyoung blinks. The warmth of her hand is gone. She's gone.
Reset.
okay guys imagine saeyoung as a dad wearing to of those baby harness things and dancing and bouncing around to sooth his kids while you walk beside him giggling at his moves
the kids babies giggle and coo with new bounces and rhythms and saeyoungs having a good time entertaining both his kids and his wife and there in the corner is saeran trying to pretend he doesn’t know you two and isn’t related to the idiot dancing around in the middle of some random store
seayoung likes pictures. he likes photo evidence and keepsakes. i have this head cannon that saeyoung is really likes the hard physical evidence thing
give this man a scrapbook with poloroid pictures of you two and handwritten captions he’ll treasure it FOREVER
and why? because so much of his life was eraseable, his job, his family, hell even his birth was something he was supposed to hide and was told the world wanted to erase.
then you come along and you collect keepsakes, photos, memories, everything he hasn’t been allowed to have his whole life and you cherish them organize them share them with him the scrap book has the ticket stubs from your first movie date together the hospital bracket from when his brother got out of the hospital and a receipt for your first meal as a family you saeyoung and saeran each one with a picture and handwritten paragraph about the day.
it’s his life in hardcover physical form. proof he existed that no hacker can edit or delete. you made this for him and it took hours upon hours or meticulous work focused on creating a record of his new life with you.
hi! idk if requests are open now but i'm feeling kind of sad about some trauma (the police got involved in what happened to me by the way) and i was wondering how seven would react to finding out about about some trauma that still really messes with mc when he's doing a background check on them - like he's going through their files and finds this almost 10 year old file about something that happened... how would he confront that? tysm you're an amazing writer and i love your stuff sm <333
hey hey i’m so sorry this took so long i haven’t been writing much lately because my life has been going through a lot of changes (all good tho)
as for the request i want to say first that I’m sorry your feeling sad but I’m so proud of you for staying strong and searching for positive things to make you feel better i have depression and i know how easy it can be to simply stay in the sad so your strength is really inspiring! I hope my writing can help even just the teensiest bit! so without further ado
seven reacts to finding trauma in MC’s background check
· by in large it would be the same. At first at least.
· He doesn’t want to bring it up in chat because he knows from experience that some people (read as him) prefer to keep trauma and painful pasts secret
· If someone brings up something similar to the incident than he not so subtly changes the subject
· For example, if it happened on a specific holiday and someone brings up that holiday he suddenly spams the chat with meme’s and ads for sevenstar drink until everyone gets distracted
· If for whatever reason he can’t change the subject to spare you potential triggers than he’s watching the CCTV extra carefully for any changes in your behavior, he can tell how tense you are how shallow your breathing is he’s been trained to notice high stress
· Soon enough your kicked from the chat as he’s calling you up his tell-tale singsong voice bouncily greeting you
· Plan A cheerful distraction! He’s turning up his energy and humor to a ten just for you. He’ll be your personal rainy day clown. Laughter is the best medicine after all.
· If you tell him, you don’t feel like joking around however he’ll quietly admit to what he’s doing.
· He’ll tell you, well, everything and suddenly all the meme spamming and ADHD-esque shenanigans make sense
· You’ll laugh, that broken half sob kind of laugh that happens when things suddenly make way too much sense
· And when he sees your shoulders shaking on the CCTV he can’t do this anymore there’s a new edge to his voice when he says “hang on” then the line goes dead
· You figure that’s just one more person who thinks your past is too much to handle (you’ve lost a couple people this way, after all why would anyone want “damaged goods”)
· Slowly you set about the arduous task of coming down from a panic attack when you hear a knock at the door and a familiar voice announcing that he’s coming inside
· You make it to the entryway as he enters and the world freezes. He has your favorite snacks and drinks his arms full of everything you two had talked about in the chat. Every off handed reference to something you loved, every mention of an obscure childhood candy, every anime, manga or book you had chatted with him about. he remembers every single one and he’s standing before you now holding them.
· “I can’t change the past.” He says lamely, like he’s admitting a great fault “but I hope I can make your present a bit better”
· You know that meme where one person says “if I run at them right now they’ll definitely catch me” well you run at him and he does in fact drop everything to catch you.
· You see Saeyoung knows trauma, knows it like the back of his hand, he knows trauma better than he knows himself. He knows he can’t fix it knows he can’t change or control it but he can make sitting with it a bit easier.
· He’ll you want you want and do anything to make it easier on you. Need to sit on his lap he’ll blush and sputter and think of a hundred and one reasons that’s a VERY bad idea, but he’ll let you all the same.
· Need to talk a mile a minute about everything that happened back then, well no matter what the RFA thinks he does in fact know how to sit down shut up and pay attention. Especially when it’s a topic he’s passionate about and there isn’t a single thing in the world he’s more passionate about than you.
· He’s honestly surprised by the difference between reading a file and hearing your firsthand account. The details are the same of course but your version is so much more visceral, so real and vivid and horrifying. The exact opposite of the cold clinical unflinching facts of the case file.
· If in ten years you were to ask him when he fell in love you he’d say it was in this moment. When your voice is shaking and your makeups messy from tears and your expression was as raw and honest and real as a person could possibly be.
· Of course he loved you before but something in that moment brought it into focus. Like taking the protective film from a camera lens. When you trusted him, when you believed that he was worthy of absolute trust and capable of absolute protection. When you chose him to share your trauma with he knew in that moment that not only did he WANT to live up to that but that he HAD to live up to that.
· You are his inspiration for change. His catalyst and muse. You make him want to be better.
· He does not love you BECAUSE of your trauma. He does not love you IN SPITE of your trauma. He loves you through your trauma, amidst it, inside and around it. He loves you, past present and future.
