Obey Me X Twst - Tumblr Posts
List of Chapters for my fanfiction named;
The premium version of human is here to wreak house, mfs.
Prologue (Shit's about to go down.)
(Pls reblog, it gives motivation :3)
(P.s If there's anything wrong with the links, pls tell me)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Tyrannical blood rose (Aka. Catan's anger issues mixed with Luke's height, and amplified by Luci's legendary stick up the ass.)
Chp. 1.1 (Yet to be available)
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Sunset Revolution (Aka. Belphie but with less yanda-yandar-eyi and more turning people into sanda-sandy-eyi.)
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Fishy practices (Aka. Solomon but somehow shadier due to the lack of fucks given towards the betterment of humanity. Feat. Barbatos' clone + his chaotic lookalike.)
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One man coup d'etat (Aka. It's snek boi time with illegal imprisonment in what is equivalent to a boot camp sprinkled in for some flavor.)
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The envy of the fairest (Aka. Asmodeus but with less manwhore tendencies.)
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Be my Persephone (Aka. Why is no one in this goddamn school normal?!)
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Coming soon! (Still thinking of titles)
The premium version of human is here to wreck house, mfs.
[Twst x Obey Me!AFAB!reader]
CHP. 5
Previous chapter; Prologue 4
CW: Same as previous chapters.
The start of the "Rose-Red Tyrant aka. Satan but tiny🌹" is nearing, y'all 🤭

Next morning...
You dragged Crowley to a quiet corner of the infirmary while temporarily kicking Yuu out, just so that you and this squawking headmaster can have a heart-to-heart discussion about the roles that you and Yuu will play in the future as Crowley tries to search for your way home.
"You try to make me and Yuu work as janitors and I will skin you alive."
"You can't just—"
"Trust me, no one will ever find your goddamn body."
You cut him off, looking at him dead-in-the-eye, full of seriousness.
You're not about to get demoted into a janitor today, nuh uh.
Not now, not ever.
Crowley can go fuck himself.
"It's the responsibility of your goddamn school to compensate us for this situation and yet you try to make us into your errand boys? I gotta give you some credit man– I mean, that audacity is through the fucking roof!"
Crowley shrinks to himself a little bit, you may not be raising your voice but you're sure as hell figuratively spitting enough venom on him that it almost burns his skin. Looks like the years of mingling and having a pact with the avatar of pride is starting to pay off.
"Actually trying to get us to go around like servants at your beck at call?! You actually dare??"
"Like seriously? Do you have any idea how hectic my daily schedule already is? Because of your damn carriage I'm a whole world away from home! And yet you have the face to try and use us for labor like we wanted to be here?? How shameless can you be?!"
With each venomous spat of yours, Crowley shrinks more and more into himself as he starts fiddling with his fingers.
He takes quick glimpses of your 'Angry-Disappointed Asian Mom Pose™' and attempts to make himself look even more smaller.
• • • • •
After that verbal beat down, you calmed yourself and decided to be a part-time nurse of this school while Yuu can be your part-time assistant. Things will be easier if you're a part of the faculty, or will you be? you'll only be a part-timer after all... though, being a nurse in the infirmary is easier than running around in this campus sweeping floors and cleaning shit. You also need money to earn necessities. Ugh, what a pain...
You then decided to drag the now-too-timid Crowley by the ear straight into his office so that you two can discuss your paychecks. With written contracts and a witness.
. . . . . . .
. . . . .
. . .
.
"What happened here?"
You asked, seeing Yuu standing beside a charred statue as a ginger and a cat scrambled to get away, only to end up getting tied by Crowley's whip as the man scolds them and Yuu for some reason.
.
You can feel years of your lifespan being shaved off when the ginger (who you've learned had been the cause of this mess) had the audacity to be shocked that he's also going to be punished for the charring of the 'Queen of hearts' statue.
It looks like being absolutely shameless is a prerequisite to be enrolled in this goddamn college.
"Hold your horses crow-man, why is Yuu being punished when they weren't even involved in burning that damn statue?"
.
So... it turns out... You may have infected Yuu with your potty mouth and chronic bitchy-ness that Yuu is actually responsible for further escalating the fight between the ginger -Ace- and the cat -grim... srsly?- as by copying the way you speak and ended up immensely bruising Ace's ego with their insults... You don't know if you should be proud of that fact or not..
You turned to the headmaster.
"...Yuu cleans 15 windows. That's the most you can give them. You can give the rest of the 100 windows to the ginger and the cat."
"Oi!—" Ace tried to speak, only for Yuu to discreetly cover his mouth. Ain't no way they're letting Ace stop you from tryna lessen their cleaning sentence.
Crowley seems to want to say something so you spoke even quicker, raising your voice so that the students around can hear you.
"Those windows are taller than Yuu and I can ever dream to be in our entire lives. You aren't going to make a magicless human clean more than 15 of those things are you?"
*Close-eyed smile*
"Well—" Crowley sputtered.
"Oh who am I kidding! Of course you won't! You're a very gracious and benevolent headmaster, aren't you..? There's no way you'll risk straining and over-working a magicless minor over a mistake they didn't even directly cause, would you~?"
*Happily clasping your hands together*
"Erm..."
Crowley would've gone back to shrinking his frame and fiddling with his fingers if there weren't students around, the face you're making is just scaring him too much... That kind of smile that made him want to meet your expectations or else..
"Ahh~ I'm soo~ happy that kind people like you are in charge of the youth! Knowing a young one's limits and adjusting to them even if they've made a big mistake! You are such an amazing educator, headmaster!"
The students, Yuu, Grim and Ace stared blankly at you, gobsmacked – exasperated – flabbershamabergasted by the stunt you're pulling.
There's no way that would work right..?
. . . .
. . right??
Crowley clears his throat, thankful that more than half of his face is covered by his mask, lest his red face be seen by all.
"A- ah yes, you're absolutely right Mr. [L/n]. Th- there's no way I can be such a callous individual, Yuu shall clean 15 windows while Grim and Trapolla will clean the rest."
He said speedily before making a swift exit, looking like a chicken with his tail on fire.
You sharply gazed at the students around and opened your mouth.
"Any of you have a fuckin problem with us?"
Those words caused the other students to start speed-walking away and the Weasley-lookin-mf scrambled to free himself from Yuu's hand.
• • • • •
Heterochromia eyes gleamed from a shady corner near the statues of the great seven.
"Hehe~ looks like Azul is right to be interested with the little cone snail–chan~"
• • • • •
MC... please.. be safe.
We'll find you, don't worry..
Then we'll make sure that no one will take you from us ever again.
← Pr. 4 | Chapter List | Pr. 6 →

Don't forget to like, and reblog guys, it really helps me and gives me motivation :>
Elae: Thanks for reading this far y'all, I really appreciate all of you 🤭
See you guys next time. <3
@leviathans-tail-scales
@f0urleaf-cl0ver
The premium version of human is here to wreck house, mfs.
[Twst x Obey Me!AFAB!reader]
CHP. 6
PREVIOUS CHAPTER: PROLOGUE 5
I get really happy every time one of you guys like, reblog, or comment on my chapters, Thanks guys :3
CW: ANYTIME that MC is referred with male address or pronouns it's going to be color blue. There's also a shit-ton of cursing here.

You can feel your blood pressure ascending into the Celestial Realm (faster than a newly deceased good person) as this Azul Asheng-something mf drags you into his oh-so-fancy "Monstro Lounge" while you're just peacefully trying to fuck off from his dorm.
You were unfortunately curious enough to go poke your head into the mirrors leading to the dorms to see what they've got and use it as inspiration, but then this greasy-ass bitch sadly spotted you and literally hounded you to go in.
You would've socked him in the face for a second time but it turns out that he's a pretty important figure in this school.
You don't really wanna get in trouble for doing that.
(You may be able to do it to Crowley but you don't know if this attempted-bangle-thief has influential parents or something.. Crowley meanwhile, acts pretty parent-less for you.)
You are keeping an eye on him though.
If he tries any bullshit then he's getting his ass kicked.
Social hierarchy be damned.
You didn't rein in 10 demons, 3 angels, The greatest sorcerer in all of humanity and The literal fuckin grim reaper, (who're all constantly dragging you onto bullshit as either an accomplice or the baby-sitter) just for some dude in an Emo-friendly-cut-my-life-into-pieces college to best you.
• • • •
Jade did a double-take.
"..."
He blinked.
Azul is sending him SOS signals by blinking morse code at him.
Jade rubbed his eyes for a few seconds.
"..."
Nope, still the same.
Azul: *Blinking for help intensifies*
...Pft–
He bit his lip to stop his laughter from escaping.
Who would've thought that he'll see a day where his precious housewarden is having his face passive-aggresively squished and kneaded by a new student? And also, probably getting himself threatened based on the eerie smile on the students' face.
Azul should be grateful that floyd isn't here, lest he'll have two people on his hands that are more than happy to squish him around. He should be grateful there isn't anyone else around, really.. Lest the reputation he took so long to build crumbles.
Oh he can just imagine it at the top of his head.. The poor octo-mer will probably combust from embarrassment and maybe even go find himself an octo-pot that he can shimmy himself into.. oh how he misses those days...
(Elae: I'm just imagining baby Azul shimmying into a lil pot.. Ugh, so adorable I'm getting cute aggression.)
He does eventually step in to stop the student from treating Azul's face like a squishy piece of dough He took a couple of pictures ofc. he ain't an amateur, but not before almost getting his own face fall victim to the new students' hands.
• • • •
"You try this shit again and see what happens." You smiled at him as you squished his face.
He's still holding onto your wrists but he seems to have given up from escaping your passive-aggresive face massage. Instead, he seems to have settled in blinking so fast he can almost fly with his eyelashes.
This bitch really had the audacity to try and get you to sell your jewelry to him in exchange for a room in his frankly unimpressive dorm. (You have more than a dozen rich and powerful simps. A dorm in a college ain't gonna be enough to impress you anymore.)
"— I know that you must not have any money to pay but maybe we can compromise, it's gonna be hard for you and your friend (Yuu) to keep staying in the infirmary after all.."
"We can manage—"
"And my benevolence will not allow me to let some poor unfortunate souls be without accommodations... So what if, for a week of stay each, you give me your jewelry in retur—"
You got so pissed at the audacity that you almost strangled him but changed your tactic into a hateful squeezing the last second. (You can't be reported for physically violent behavior rn.)
He speaks as if the entirety of this college and its dorms can actually be worth even a single piece of the ring in your left hand.
But seriously? 15,000 madols (that's the price Azul told you) for one night of stay?? If you're gonna be paying that much money for a single room, then that room better solve all your problems, fulfill your greatest ambitions and then suck your imaginary dick afterwards.
Your annoyed musings were cut off when a hand tries to remove your grip from Azul's face.
You absent-mindedly reach your other hand, trying to deliver another kneading to a new victim.
• • • • •
Azul covers his face with his hand, embarrassed of how the situation played out.
It doesn't help that Floyd is cackling like a deranged maniac at him right now.
Thank goodness they're in his office.
"Can you stOp?!"
Poor bbg was so embarrassed his voice cracked :<
Hmph.
Jokes on you, even if he got embarrassed today he still got closer to your jewelry.
And now, he can 100% confirm that those ornaments aren't just for decorations.
The strong magic from your rings that were pressed against his face confirmed it.
Those things are definitely custom-made magical artifacts of the highest caliber.
Now.. How to get them...
• • • • •
You stopped walking, feeling someone's gaze on you.
Looking around discreetly, you didn't see anyone but you can still feel the eyes on your form.
Yeah no.
You continue on, ignoring the feeling of being watched, but not going to dark places or spots where you'll be all alone.
Time to check in on Yuu and their unwilling gang of window cleaners.
See if they're done already.
The sun is starting to go down, after all.
• • • • •
Mc... We're going to come find you.
Don't worry..
Please stay safe..
Please don't forget that we love you more than anything else in existence..
0u® |!gHt įN tH€ d@RkN€§$
← Pr. 5 | Chapter List | Pr. 7 →

EDIT: WTF WHY DID THIS CHAPTER GET POSTED?! I SAVED IT IN THE GODDAMN DRAFTS THIS AIN'T SUPPOSED TO BE DONE YET WHAT THE HELL?!
Oh welp, ain't nothing I can do about it now..
Thanks for reading this far, readers☺️
Reblog or I'll bite ya ankles😈
@f0uerleafedcl0ver
@leviathans-tail-scales
@a-traveling-void-human
@xingyunny
@caprinaesprout (should I put you in the permanent tag list for this series?)
Tagging isn't working for some reason so I can't tag some of y'all. The usernames I tagged just fuckin disappearing.
Tumblr is messing with me rn.
You wanna throw hands, Tumblr??
List of Chapters for my fanfiction named;
The premium version of human is here to wreck house, mfs.
Prologue (Shit's about to go down.)
(Pls reblog, it gives motivation :3)
(P.s If there's anything wrong with the links, pls tell me)
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Tyrannical blood rose (Aka. Catan's anger issues mixed with Luke's height, and amplified by Luci's legendary stick up the ass.)
• Chp. 1.1
• Chp. 1.2
• Chp. 1.3 (Yet to be available)
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Sunset Revolution (Aka. Belphie but with less yanda-yandar-eyi and more turning people into sanda-sandy-eyi.)
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Fishy practices (Aka. Solomon but somehow shadier due to the lack of fucks given towards the betterment of humanity. Feat. Barbatos' clone + his chaotic lookalike.)
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One man coup d'etat (Aka. It's snek boi time with illegal imprisonment in what is equivalent to a boot camp sprinkled in for some flavor.)
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The envy of the fairest (Aka. Asmodeus but with less manwhore tendencies. Both serving cunt nonetheless)
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Be my Persephone (Aka. Why is no one in this goddamn school normal?! Ortho put the particle canon down—)
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Sleeping beauty got nothing on this perfect bitch. (Aka. Ass-kissing to authority gone wrong.)
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The premium version of human is here to wreck house, mfs.
[Twst x ObeyMe!AFAB!reader]
CHP. 7
Again, I thank y'all for the reblogs, likes and comments guys, it really helps me :)
CW: Blue pronouns or address for MC every time they get mistaken for a guy. Also, I'm a potty mouth so MC is too.

Inhale..
Exhale....
Inhale......
Exhale.......
Inhale.........
Ex-fucking-hale.......
You're about to have a stroke right now.
You should've just went back to the goddamn infirmary instead of checking in on these obnoxious, bitch-less, probably father-less, motherfuckers.
It's just cleaning windows!! How the hell can you mess up like this?! Why the fuck did the cafeteria chandelier get involved??
GODDAMNIT!! WHY IS YUU INVOLVED AS WELL?! AHHHH—!
*One eternity of screaming like a banshee later*
After sending those damn kids and cat away to get some sort of magical stone in some godforsaken mine, you wrangled with the headmaster for at least two hours to prevent him from writing up the expulsion papers of Yuu and that Blue-haired kid who was mostly innocent about the ordeal.
(Meanwhile, encouraging him to kick that Ace kid and the damn cat off the school. You ain't about to let audacity run free rn, mostly because you feel yourself start genuinely tweaking as you almost got possessed by the urge to sucker punch someone's soul out of their body.)
[Satan perked up, there it was again.
That distinctive spark of wrath that he can feel through your pact with him is both concerning and comforting.
On one hand, the anger he feels means that you're alive. And seeing that what he's feeling through the pact is mostly annoyance, then that must mean that nothing marginally bad or traumatizing had happened to you yet.
You're actually more pissed off in a 'someone-had-the-audacity-to-eat-my-snacks' kind of way more than anything else, meaning that you're safe for now.
But on the other hand, he doesn't know how long that temporary safety will last.
There's also the fact this is the fourth time he'd felt that spark of 'I-wanna-punt-someone-into-the-fuckin-sun' kind of anger from you, which is worrying because it hasn't even been 48 hours since you were kidnapped by some mf.
He shook his head, calling upon a subordinate (read: Devoted fan) to collect more and more books to learn what type of teleportation and sleeping magic was used in your kidnapping.
With the massive search party spanning all three realms that they'd called upon, they will find you sooner or later.
And once they do...
Well... You'll need to get used to being with someone at all hours of the day.]
*Passive-aggresively reminding Crowley that he can't kick out an innocent kid for something they didn't directly do as they had no way of stopping the events that transpired.*
["You don't want the word to get out that you let an innocent teen roam around in a foreign world with absolutely nothing to their name and nobody to protect them, right?"
"That is true, but I still can't just let this go unpunis–"
"Especially when it's the school's faulty equipment that took them so far away from all of their loved ones and belongings, right?"]
Needless to say, Yuu ended up being "fired" in the end, quite an unfortunate result because they will need to freeload off of you until the end of your stay in this world. (Poor them, they got fired before they knew that they had a job in the first place.)
Oh well, it's better than being kicked out from practically their only way back home right now...
Hays... That cruel crow..
Anygays, it's time to snoop around and hopefully make some connections to the residents of this school.
This is a well-known college, right? So there should be influential people here somewhere...
Hehe.. It's time you bring out your gaslight, gatekeep, gold-digging skills so that you can girlboss your way into stability inside this foreign world.
• • • • • •
Suddenly, more than a dozen individuals felt a strong shiver run up their spines.
Haha... Well that's ominous!
• • • • • •
Ortho deadpanned at his brother.
It seems that almost burning down their dorm room last night isn't enough to deter him from making his [Mr. L/n x reader] fanfiction complete with mandatory fan art for every single chapter.
Haaa....
But at least his brother isn't 'fanboying' about another fictional character again...
Hm... Now that he thinks about it..
Maybe his brother will be more inclined to make friends if it's Mr. L/n!
And thus begins Ortho's journey of being an unknowing wingman as he tries to get his introverted brother to make friends.
• • • • • •
You narrowed your eyes as you looked at the small gift on top of your temporary bed in the infirmary.
Dats suspicious....
Dats weird......
You turn your necklace into a staff and start poking the box, trying to see if it'll suddenly turn into a horrific eldritch monster and jump you. (Won't be the first time that happened.)
• • • • •
"It is done, ××× ×× ××××××" (This is too easy to guess😑)
• • • • •
Diavolo sighed for the tenth time that hour, lamenting how trying to focus on his paperwork is a really hard task when MC gets thrown into the situation.
'Maybe a small break will help clear my head?'
He might as well just go out for a walk in the garden to get some fresh... air...
Oh? what is this?
His eyes scanned the dark envelope he'd seen wedged under the 'To burn' stack of paperwork in his desk.
This envelope wasn't here yesterday...
After confirming that the piece of paper wasn't cursed or charmed, he opened it with apprehension.
...!
This..!
• • • • •
Barbatos appeared in the office, tense as he'd heard his lord call out his name with haste.
Reading the letter shoved in front of his face by the serious Diavolo, Barbatos made a mental note to get the dungeon chambers ready.
They've got themselves a lead.
← Pr.6 | Chapter List | Chp. 1.1 →
Just tell me if y'all wanna get added in the permanent taglist, even if I already tagged y'all here.
That's just so I'll know if you wanna get tagged in all the upcoming chapters of this fanfic.
@caprinaesprout
@iameliseposts
@leviathans-tail-scales
@twst-om-lover
@a-traveling-void-human

Reblog or I'll take your ankles😈 (Pls like and reblog, it really gives me motivation🥺)
Also, the next chap is the start of Arc 1: Satan but short.
The premium version of human is here to wreck house, mfs.
[Twst x Obeyme!AFAB!reader]
CHP. 1.1: The start of the Blood Rose Tyrant.
Thank you, my amazing readers, for all the likes, comments, and reblogs🥹 It makes so happy, like– almost nothing can top the joy of seeing y'all liked my work :)
Btw, If you have any questions about my tagging and/or literally anything you wanna ask me bout the fic, just reach out to me and I'll try my best to answer you.😊
CW: Cursing, Idk what else... There's also the pronoun schtick I've been yapping about since pr. 1. (i.e MC will get mistaken for a pretty guy a lot -Mc is AFAB referred to as they/them- because the NRC cast have come to expect only boys to be in the school. Excluding the paintings ofc.)

(My pic)
Fun fact: While all of your ornaments act as containers to very *nom*-able amounts of magic, such a thing can be dangerous as it may give away your location if you need to hide or run away from someone.
Therefore, all of them were cast with a special spell developed by Solomon that makes it so that people can't sense that magic unless they're really close to you physically.
(Not to mention, only exceptional mages can actually have the hope of picking up on that magic as your all jewelry were also cast with a heavy magical concealment blessing from both Micheal and Luke.)
• • •
'What the hell is this?'
You think as you fiddled with the fancy pouch in your hands.
You had opened the gift box to find the pouch containing some basic skincare products and just went; ( •_•)..?
Like– What the hell? Who does that?? Are they saying that you're ugly and needed to start taking care of your face?! Well excuse you, I'll have you know –whomever you are– that this face was approved by Asmodeus himself you rude lil' shi—
*Ehem*
So like any sane person is supposed to do in that situation, you checked if the products were cursed or charmed and then pocketed it to maybe sell it in the future for some cash. (Lovely gift but you were taught never to use/ingest things given to you by strangers.)
Leaving the infirmary, you venture into the botanical garden, hoping you'd find some edible plants that you and Yuu can nibble on until you can procure other food options and some all important moneh. (Ugh, if only that damn crow didn't escape and hide away from you, you would've extorted his cowardly-ass and bought some food instead of needing to resort to this bs.)
'Trying to find a stone in a long abandoned mine is simply a fools errand.'
You thought as you absent-mindedly skipped past a certain tall, dark, and handsome man with horns, unknowing of the look of pure curiosity pointed at your back as you continued your musings.
'But oh well, they wanted to try so they might as well be those fools.'
You're not gonna stop them if they wanna try to fix things even though you've mostly stabilized the situation. (Not that they know.)
Damn, you also need to go to the library later so that you can learn what changes you'd need to do in order to adapt and know the problems you'd likely experience in this world.
Knowing yourself and your history for being a magnet of chaos, It'd probably involve almost dying more times than you have fingers and unearthing some deeply-buried soul-crushing trauma in which the only thing you'll get in return are the friends you've made along the way.
Aside from that though, you'd need to gain yourself a foothold in this society.
Preferably, there would be a lot of rich and influential people in this school to suck up to, but if those aren't enough then maybe you can venture into industries where you can kiss-ass in peace.
As much as you'd love to be optimistic, Crowley is the almost literal embodiment of a dead-beat dad barely pays child-support and your own search for a way home may take years before coming to fruition.
Tsk. You can feel your stress levels transcending the mortal plane of existence again as you can already envision the figurative mountain-range you'd need to climb just to achieve stability in this place.
$°\•m°n.. p/€∆$3.. H€\₱ m£...
Times like these just make you wanna curl up onto the floor in a fetal position and let the earth consume you whole.
Oh! And you also need to obtain a stronger blackmail material against Crowley to make sure he won't try anything remotely against you.
'Hmm... But maybe...'
You think as you took a quick and discreet glance to a security camera that had been "coincidentally" pointed at you.
Well, not really a coincidence.
If the mf behind these creepy-ass cameras —that have been watching you since your arrival here, mind you—, can lend you a hand then that would be the optimal outcome. There are a lot of security cameras after all...
Though there's also a large possibility that the fucker wanted you dead because of either boredom, simple bloodlust, money, vengeance (for some reason), your organs or all of the above.
You sighed as you entered the botanical garden, telling yourself to just worry about that later and focus on finding food.
If you get in trouble for taking plants here, you'll just throw Crowley under the bus. (figuratively and literally if he decides to be a bitch about it.)
• • • •
Yuu, Grim, Ace, and Deuce stumbled out of the mirror, finally away from the creepy forest and back into the college.
They all flinched and turned their heads back when they heard a dramatic 'Tsktsktsk–' from behind them.
"Well well well~ Look who finally decided to show up at–"
*checks imaginary wrist watch*
"46 minutes past midnight.. Huh.. If you all got any curfew for your dorms then you're both toast. Can't believe y'all spent more than five hours looking for a single rock..."
You said, referring to the two first years who flinched under your words and judgemental eyes.
"You all look like shit by the way."
Yuu awkwardly scratched their head.
"Thanks?"
*Sigh...*
"You're welcome, bbg."
"Just hurry up and give that rock to the fuckin crow already so that you all can spare the world from having to witness anymore of your gross, sweaty, homeless-lookin selves."
Deuce shrunk even further behind Yuu. (funny because Yuu was at least half-a-head shorter.)
Ace meanwhile, has too much ego to not say anything back.
"We wouldn't be looking like this if you at least helped!" He snarked.
"Why should I?"
You Dwayne-the-rock-Johnson raised your eyebrow at him.
"I don't owe any of you a smidgen of literally anything so why should I help?"
It wasn't a question, but a statement. Because why should you help? They should be grateful you even talked Crowley out of expelling them immediately. Not that they know but still...
But of course, audacity is gonna audacity. Because, Ace really had the nerve to look offended by your words, as if you weren't saying something as truthful as the sky being blue, the grass being green, and your ass being a literal masterpiece from god.
"Don't even try to pass off the blame, Weasley-wannabe. I know it, you know it, your mom knows it, your dad if you have one, your entire bloodline and your non-existent cow knows it, there's literally no point."
Ace literally almost snarled at you like a damn dog, pft– That's what he gets from pissing you off by existing earlier.
"Oh shut up!"
He then looked like he was about to start a rant of how unfair his life was and how he totally didn't deserve any of this and blahblahblahblahblah–
You swear on Diavolo and Luci's fruity man-boobs, you'll hang this bitch upside down like a bat if you had to hear another complaint about things being unfair for him.
What about you? or Yuu? Isn't life more cruel and unfair to you two? Taking you both away from loved ones and shoving you into a world where you two need to fight for a temporary sanctuary as you both try to go home with no real proof you'll actually be able to make it back?
Isn't life more unfair to you? Right when you almost finally achieved the start of your happy ending.. You were taken away from the people that you fought tooth and nail to be with.. And now, they're all too far away for you to reach... again.
Deuce elbowed Ace, thankfully making the jab to the ribs painful for the annoying ginger.
You dramatically sighed again, turning to Yuu and Deuce.
"Remember kids, don't copy Ace's attitude okay? Lest you want to end up single and with no bitches for the rest of your life."
Ace's right eye twitched erratically, shouting at you to shut up and to stop messing with him.
• • • • •
Talking with the crow is an annoying affair as expected. At least now, Yuu is finally an official learner of the school. Even if they're just half-a-student with the loud talking cat. (That kinda reminds you of Mammon, now that you think of it. Also very funny because the cat's name is grim of all things..)
Oh, and you're a prefect now. You're definitely going to make that everyone's problem. Hehehehehe~
"So the abandoned dorm we were supposed to live in is fixed now? How? Hasn't it only been like– a day?"
You ominously beamed at the question, releasing a sinister little giggle that caused Ace, Deuce, and the now wide-awake Grim to subconsciously shiver while Yuu refrained from asking further questions and just wisely snickered instead.
Unseen by everyone, you sent a quick devious little smile to a wall where a certain electrical device was mounted, biting down a snort when you saw the security camera suddenly snap into another direction, as if it was a person embarrassed that they got caught by someone they were staring at.
You then had to hold back a cackle as you remembered how easily this newly made stalker friend of yours snitched on the headmaster, like– you literally didn't even do anything, the flustered boy just gave you the blackmail material that you needed. Well, maybe you did corner him a little bit by using his own electronics against him but you're pretty sure he enjoyed it for some reason if the way he literally blurted out 'mommy-' at you was anything to go by—
Haha, the benefits of having a hacker as a fren :3
• • • •
Kicking away the two idiots and telling them to go back to their dorms already, you dragged Yuu inside the now newly fixed dorm.
The two of you needed to talk about a few things and arrangements..
• • • •
Quickly opening the door in hopes that the fucker that was banging on it gets mash-dabbed face-first, you saw nothing but disappointment as the bastard — Ace — had actually moved away from the door in an impressive display of intuition and spidey-sense before you had even wretched the door open.
"What the fuck do you want, you ugly punyeta?"
It hasn't even been a few hours since this mf parted ways with you and Yuu, so what could be the problem now?
. .. . . . . ..
"No, you're sleeping on the couch."
"What?! But why?!! There are perfectly good rooms here!"
"All the other rooms besides the one we're using are still unfurnished. The beds in them are yet to be assembled and the floors are dusty because of the quick renovations." Yuu stated, rubbing the bridge of their nose.
"Ughhhhh! Just let me squeeze in, I promise I won't take up too much space!"
"Nice try but no."
"Tch, You're all so stingy and inhospitable.."
"Yuu, Do you hear that?" You said, theatrically cupping your ear with a hand.
"Yes, It seems that a forever virgin is talking." Yuu answered with a smirk.
"Hey!"
"Sorry, you oompa-loompa lookin ass— we unfortunately can't understand the language of people who can't pull."
"You guys are the worst."
"Thanks bbg." you and Yuu paused.
"Pft–"
"Oh dear~ It seems you're starting to take after me."
"Indeed it seems." Yuu replied, even subconsciously copying the fancy accent you used.
"Oh no, you're multiplying. :0"
"Haha, we're still dragging you to apologize to your Housewarden later."
"Aww shucks.."
← Pr.7 | Chapter List | Chp. 1.2 →

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