Oxidizeds - Tumblr Posts
oxidizeds:
open to: any gender !! based on: the third bullet of this post / can go either in a good terms or an angst route idm !
after what felt like fifty years almost two hours of being cooped up at his desk in his thrown together bedroom, logan was beginning to get a little bit stir crazy. while it was mostly his own fault for willingly deciding to pick his small quarters as his designated safe zone while his roommate had a date over, he couldn’t help but feel a little bit personally tortured as the clock struck ten. realistically, he doubted the other would have had any problem with him exiting his room to secure a snack or two, but given their previous.. circumstances, he wanted to spare them the awkward explanation that his presence would probably require. it wasn’t until he heard the apartment’s front door close that he assumed that their prolonged date had finally reached its end, causing him to scramble to his feet in a desperate attempt at an escape from the dorm-like room. after securing a long-awaited snack, he cautiously headed towards the other’s bedroom, which fit the proper definition of the term. lazily leaning against the doorframe, he popped a cheez-it into his mouth with a raised eyebrow. “so? what’s the jury’s verdict?”
perhaps this was seongmin’s way of coping, having a different person over nearly once a week. it had been a rough few months since their breakup, and though he’s not feeling hard enough feelings to move out, he does feel as though he might crumble if they share another awkward glance after a part has left for the night. even if they wanted to leave and end this . . . roommate situation, he couldn’t. neither one made nearly enough money to pay for the expenses of living alone. seongmin was not going to move back in with his mother, he swore that to himself the second they left. after sending off this night’s date, he tosses himself back onto his mattress and lets out a bellowing sigh, eyes fixated on the ceiling, unaware that he had been barely breathing until he hears logan’s voice. ‘ uh, inconclusive. ’ they offer an anxious laugh, arms cross over their body. ‘ couldn’t . . . perform. so she left. ’ in all honestly, it had been becoming increasingly more difficult to ignore the fact that he was allowing another to touch him, let alone inside the apartment he was meant to share with logan. he choked, right in the middle of making out his date, too anxious to take anything further. which was the case for most of his nightly visits with strangers. there’s only been one time he was able to get lost, but that was more so due to the drugs that were brought for them to dabble in. ‘ you can leave the crawl space now, i know it’s difficult to be so . . . closed up when you’re working as you do. ’
oxidizeds:
once the tone of seongmin’s laugh registered, it began to click in logan’s head that maybe he should’ve waited a bit before darkening their door like so. granted, he had been aching for some sort of human interaction, but that didn’t erase how selfish bombarding them directly after his date was. the feeling of guilt only rose at the mention of why the date ended, forcing him to silently accept the fact. he didn’t want to appear as though he was judging seongmin; he would never dare to, after everything they had been through. if anything, logan would have been in the same boat, but he didn’t have the –– for lack of a better term –– balls to attempt move on with another person in any form. even if he had, he doubted he’d be able to fully go for it if his ex was sitting a room away, too. it had been a while, sure, but any potential suitors fell flat when compared to seongmin. so, as a default, lonesome nights became the new normal. did this new normal erase the thought of seongmin’s room once being theirs, together, whenever he passed by? no, of course not. but he was working on it, along with cracking their case. of course, his business was in no shape or form logan’s, but it did not stop him from worrying about him. he could act like he did not know what was going on for their sake, but he wasn’t blind. at his words, logan simply shook his head before letting a shrug roll of his shoulders, “nah, you don’t have to worry about me. i chose to hangout in there, so i gotta deal with the consequences.” he paused for a moment, eyes drifting towards the red box in his hands as he looked for his next words, trying to avoid sounding egocentric as he spoke. “i’m sorry for hanging around tonight, or if it made it weird for you, or anything. that wasn’t my intention, i promise.”
the softness in logan’s voice made seongmin’s sink, wrenching, it was hard to not picture him as if he was coming home to him again, shitty movie in hand, when they’d spend the night discussing and cuddling. it’s tough for them to stay seated, not jump to their feet to greet him with a hug, and technically speaking, perhaps he could. it had been awhile since they parted ways. this had become their new normal, but given their history, and how the split still sit well within seongmin-- it probably isn’t a good idea to go around and inviting the other in for such an intimate gesture. or rather, it felt more intimate because it was logan. had it always been that way? dark doe eyes dart to their lips, where they settle, taking in the state of his nervousness. had he been the cause for this? had he somehow upset logan, again? he’s overthinking now, his fists ball and tuck beneath his own shirt, a habit he’s learned early on in his childhood. ‘ i think that’s the last of . . . my dates, if you want to move back in here. ’ eyes widen, he’s quick to explain himself. ‘ i mean, for your work stuff. i didn’t mean-- ’ their face turns bright red now, fists beneath his shirt clenching hard enough that he can feel them numbing. a deep breath is taken. ‘ no, it’s not you. you didn’t cause any of the issues i faced tonight . . . i don’t want you thinking that. ’ partially true, while his mind had been on logan, who sat only meters away, it was his own thoughts of failure and guilt that got him down. had he been able to not picture logan but rather, the woman on top of him, it might have worked. maybe. but seongmin’s already not the random sex type, but he’s depressed and stressed ; figured it might good to give it a go. since it hasn’t worked, he’s done trying, and makes a mental note in the back of their brain to stop avoiding his true feelings. he isn’t over logan, and even so, no one else could compare. ‘ did you want to watch something, maybe? ’
@oxidizeds / closed starter.
charlotte never thought in a million years that she’d find herself in this kind of situation she actually half expecting something much more worse really. but to her surprise here she was sitting by the edge of the bed in this barely lit room with the room everything was totally silent as the both of them hadn’t spoken to each other yet when they had both agreed to do this. in her defense charlotte was much too nervous about the whole thing thinking all of the things that could go wrong in this situation and how easily she could mess everything up given how inexperienced she was in regards to have intimate relations with another human. she was obviously excited about the whole thing at the same time especially given how much time she’d already spent with the other they had really gotten close with one other over the past few days and one day out of the blue she decided to take the plunge with the other even if they declined her offer which thankfully they didn’t in this instance. turning towards the other getting more & more nervous as time passed letting out a soft sigh before speaking. " so how would you like to start this ?? i mean like i said before i’m not really all that experienced with this sort of stuff. " she said swallowing down hard her saliva flashing the other a soft smile as she moved closer to them on the bed waiting to see what exactly will happened between them.