Professor!remus X Plus Size!reader - Tumblr Posts

boggarts and puns

A/N: this is my first fic since i was like 12 so please be kind :)

plus size!reader x young professor!remus

characters are of age but this is pretty much just fluff. 

warnings: internalized fatphobia, pretty heavy insecurities (can you tell this is just me trying to make myself feel better about my body lmao)

you raise your trembling fist to knock on the defense against the dark arts door. you were not looking forward to this appointment. it was bound to be humiliating, but you would be damned if you didn’t get through this class. it had never been your favorite (you were more gifted in potions), but this year it was even more difficult. 

professor lupin was one of the most attractive people you’d ever met. it was impossible to focus with him teaching, his passion and inherent kindness lighting up his face. you told yourself, again and again, that it was just a crush, that schoolgirls developed little infatuations with their teachers all the time. but it made it exceedingly difficult to pay attention to his lectures when all you could hear was the increasing beat of your own heart as you gazed at his handsome, scarred face. 

and lately, you were less certain that it was “just a crush”. you no longer consciously thought about him constantly, but it felt like you were breathing him in and out. something you were always aware of, just a little bit, that you could focus on or disregard, but he would still always be there, dancing at the edge of your consciousness with a little smile and encouraging eyes. in his presence, you felt like you were home, despite your insecurities and doubts and fears. surely all of that was more than a crush, as much as it scared you to admit.

of course, he could never be interested in you. for one, you were his student, and whatever you felt for him, you felt quite certain that he would not be so dishonorable as to have feelings for someone he had such authority over. for another, well… you had always been insecure about your body, as you had never been skinny. you were all round and soft, professor lupin would certainly only want someone toned and beautiful. not that he was shallow, of course, but people couldn’t help who they were attracted to, and it was most certainly not you.

the door opened quite suddenly, pulling you out of your thoughts. professor lupin’s face broke into a small smile upon seeing you, making your heart skip a beat or two. “hello, y/n. come on in.” 

you stepped into the classroom, glancing around. things were still set up from your class’ lesson earlier that week, the wardrobe containing the boggart shaking and rattling. you had known instantly what your worst fear would be, and you knew your classmates would inevitably mock you for it. you had pulled the professor aside while your peers were taking their turn combatting the creature, and asked if you could give it a try in private. he agreed, stating that he would need to be present in case something went awry. now, it feels as though you simply drew out the humiliation. somehow, facing this in private, in front of a man you had strong feelings for, seemed more embarrassing than doing it in front of your classmates. 

“before we get started, did you have any questions about the lesson?” there was openness and warmth in his voice, quelling any…scholarly fears you might have had.

“no, professor, i understand what to do,” you said, your voice shaking slightly from nerves about what you knew was about to happen. 

“alright, just as in class, i’m going to open this wardrobe, and the boggart will take its form. use the riddikulus charm while keeping in mind a form for the boggart to take that would make you laugh, and i will be right here to stop it if something goes wrong,” he reassured you.

“okay, professor. thank you.”

he flicked his wand at the wardrobe, and it creaked open. a figure appeared within it, quickly becoming obvious that it was professor lupin himself. however, there was an expression on his face you had never seen before. a smirk, that almost seemed mocking. you didn’t look at the real professor, fearing his reaction. 

you raised your wand, hoping to get this done with before the boggart could speak, but before you could utter the spell, the creature had opened its mouth and begun its taunts.

“you’re absolutely idiotic. did you really think i could have feelings for someone like you? you’re so stupid and naive. even if you weren’t just a little girl, do you really believe i could feel for you what you do for me? you’re fat and lazy, sometimes i laugh at the thought of us together. you’re just a child, the thought of being with you is enough to make me nauseous. if you were to ever-”

you clenched your eyes shut, screwing up your courage. you thought back to a conversation the two of you had had in class a couple weeks ago. 

“you’re all doing very well. it’s riddikulus how proud i am of you!”

“professor, did you just make a pun?”

“riddikulus!” 

the boggart snapped its mouth shut, its face shifting to one of pride and comfort. 

“that’s it, you’re doing well. just a little more practice and it’ll be riddikulus how fast boggarts will run from you.”

i let out a snort of laughter. “that’s such a bad pun.”

“you still laughed! i’ll have you know that puns are my favorite form of humor. you can use them in any scenario.”

“oh really?” i responded, laughter in my voice. “tell one about divination.”

“hmm…ah! i gave up fortune-telling. there’s no future in it.”

“ha! i like that one. i prefer potions, myself. they cause quite a stir.”

he barked out a laugh. “that was just bad.”

“if you don’t like my magic jokes, you can acci-go through that door.”

“careful, you don’t want to get ex-spelled.”

“oh, i’m sorry, you’re a lumos in my life.”

“did someone use the confusion charm on you? because it’s confunding how polite you’re being.”

you laughed out loud then, before the real professor lupin moved in front of you. you gulped. you had forgotten he was there. his misty orb appeared before him before he firmly said, “riddikulus!” and turned to you. your eyes were cast downward. “y/n-”

“uh, i think i should go, i have a lot of homework to do and i really don’t want to deal with this situation right now. i’ll see you in class, bye!”

“y/n.”

you stopped on your way to the door and turned slowly, your cheeks heated and your eyes were fixed on the floor. “professor, we don’t have to talk about this. you can let me go and we’ll both be awkward for a couple days and then we’ll get over it and move on.”

he stepped toward you. “what if i want to talk about it?”

you chanced a glance upwards. his gaze was worried, and kind, and…hopeful?

“look, i…lots of students have crushes on their teachers, right? it’ll go away.” you didn’t want it to go away, but you didn’t say that. 

“is…is that really how you think i see you?”

you shrugged. “i mean, you’re too nice to say it like that, but yeah, that’s how i think you feel.”

“no, i…i probably shouldn’t say this, but that’s not at all how i feel about you.”

“oh?” you glanced away as he stepped closer. you felt his hand on your cheek and felt your heart get impossibly faster as you met his gaze. 

“i look at you, and i see someone strong, and kind, and beautiful. i am consumed by you, i think about you all the time. even if i’m just grading papers in my office, i imagine you across from me, working on schoolwork or–or grading papers of your own, after you become a potions professor. and i curse the fact that my imaginings aren’t real, that i can’t reach across my desk and take your hand. i curse the fact that you are so much younger, and deserve so much better, than me. and right now, i curse the fact that this is as far as i can allow myself to go, that i can’t close this gap and kiss you until you believe that i love you.”

you let out a small breath, feeling his warmth so close to you. “i love you too,” you breathed. “it feels as though you are a part of me, like you are in the very air i breathe. you make me smile, and laugh, and believe in love. and everyday, i imagine myself in your arms, and i feel so much less broken. i would give anything for things to be different between us, but for now i live for the moments i spend with you.”

his face broke into a broad grin unlike that which you had seen before. he reached down and grabbed each of your hands before bringing them to his mouth softly. “i love you, y/n.”

“i love you too, remus.”

“but…”

your heart slowed a little. “but i’m too young.”

“well, yes. although...you’re only a few years younger than me.”

“really? how’d you get to be a professor so young?”

“pure talent,” he replied with a cocky grin.

“so…i’m not too young...what’s the but?” you said, trying to keep us on topic.

“but i’m your professor. there’s a power imbalance here that i just can’t feel good about, and you mean too much for me to potentially hurt you with whatever power i have over you.”

“oh,” you breathed. “right.” you blinked, a realization coming to you. “you know…i only have a few weeks until i leave hogwarts. if you think about it, you won’t be my professor for much longer.”

he grinned again, his face lighting up like the lumos charm. “i can wait until then.”

“me too.”

you pulled him into a tight hug, pressing your lips into the line of his hair. you breathed in his scent, chocolate and old books, committing it to memory for the next four weeks. you tried to release him, but he clung onto you a little longer, seemingly unwilling to let go. your hands rested on his back, and you closed your eyes, reveling in the feeling of his arms around you. 

you finally released one another and stepped back. you held out your hand for a shake. “i’ll see you in class, professor. thank you for the instruction.”

he took your hand firmly and straightened up. “i’ll see you in class, y/n. stop by anytime.”

you turned and walked out the door, a giddy joy in your heart that you hadn’t expected when you knocked on that door earlier that afternoon. he loved you. you loved him. you would wait for him as long as it took.