Requested By Me - Tumblr Posts

can you do pangender dave or john icons ?🤞

how about both?

(i was originally just gonna do john, because ive done dave a lot, but i couldnt resist doing dave haha)

Omg, I can't tell you enough how amazing this was!! It was so sweet and you captured the residents' actions/reactions soooo damn well! Great job, honestly 😍

Hey you’re writing is really cute and I saw your hcs for a mc with a girlfriend and I really loved it! Do you think you can do a ikevamp suitors react to a transgender mc? One who was born female but identifies as a man? Lgbqt otome fans don’t get enough love so I’d be super awesome if you could write something ❤️

Hello darling!! I’m so sorry this took me a month or so to get to, but I’m glad to be doing it now! I also had an ask for a non-binary!mc but since I feel like all the suitors would treat the two similarly, I’ll be trying my best to fit it into one/accommodate both here :) hope you enjoy, love! Please lmk if anything sounds sketchy/offensive, since I don’t have experience with this myself!

napoleon ; okay. You stare at him dumbstruck bc he’s not taken aback for a moment, he just shrugs and then asks if you want to spar. I feel like he’d treat you v similarly to issac and jean even if you are his lover, bc there’s a v specific respect and care he treats those two with, a way he looks out for them. Would never falter with your pronouns, and if anyone makes a comment he’s like?? Your point?? They’re obv a man/non-binary, idk how you’re seeing a woman. He would also never hesitate to draw out his sword if anyone dared to grow a little too bold/rude.

arthur ; handsome ol’ chap! absolutely slathers you in compliments to validate your identity and make you feel confident, you almost wonder if he likes the way calling you by your pronouns rolls off his tongue. Though he normally was into women, I don’t think he would be opposed to dating you at all, and would grow icy with others who made comments about your relationship. He’s be very vocally supportive, but his teasing compliments will take a softer, more sincere turn if you ever need him to remind you that you’re valid.

mozart ; I see him helping you fix up your appearance ngl? Like not spending a bunch like comte, but silently aiding you in how to appear/act manly/non-binary for the 1800s, such as fixing/trimming your hair into a more “fashionable” look for the times, or nonchalantly informing you that your sleeves should be a little longer. He doesn’t do this to invalidate you at all! He thinks it’s a more subtle way of helping you feel confident navigating their world in your own way. Never hesitates to inform you that you look rather dashing that evening, or to run his finger along your chin with a proud/loving gaze in his eyes.

leonardo ; he’s immortal, he’s heard many a things that haven’t been considered ‘the norm’ for the times. He just kind of nods and takes a step back to admire your face, saying that your features are beautifully androgynous/masculine. If you bind your chest, he’ll frown if you suggest using a kind of corset, and will instead get to work tinkering a more comfortable and safe binding for you to use. Always refers to you as your desires pronouns, and corrects anyone who uses incorrect ones nonchalantly. He likes that he can get away with certain things with you that normal het couples wouldn’t be able to.

vincent ; I think he’d be intrigued and easily adapt to your pronouns; he’d treat you with respect regardless. He’s probably heard of transgender/non-binary before, but I think he, like leo, would spend a lot of time admiring your face and the way you present yourself. Will constantly compliment you, but unlike arthur, it’s not to fluster you or subtly make you feel confident, but bc he keeps finding things about you to be in awe of. You’ll be a very common subject in his sketches and paintings because of the way you hold yourself.

theo ; His brows raise a bit, but they lower just as quickly and he accepts it. You almost think he doesn’t care/remember bc he always calls you a dog instead of your name/pronoun, but he instantly corrects anyone who uses the wrong one, and glares at anyone who gives you shit. If you ever get down on yourself for your appearance not matching your identity, he sternly sits you down and firmly lists everything about you he finds beautiful and fitting to what you want to be. And though it wasn’t his intention, you never fail to grow flustered bc of the little details he’s picked up on, due to the nature of his job rubbing off on his own perceptiveness.

issac ; A little flustered boy. Similar to jean, I think he’d have the right attitude but be a bit clumsy about it. He doesn’t want to offend you! Ofc being trans/a man/non-binary doesn’t matter, he just loves you, but he’s anxious and overthinks how he address you, how he acts around you. Should he not call you petnames? Are those considered feminine? Am I invalidating them by using them?? He just grows stiff and nervous and you have to remind him to breath: just use the correct pronouns and respect you, there’s not much else to it. After a while he relaxes and it comes easier, but he just doesn’t want to lose someone else he loves of his own doing.

dazai ; I will admit he’s a little hard to grasp for me, but I believe that elusiveness is a part of his character anyways lol. Nothing about how he perceives you changes. You’re still you, aren’t you? Doesn’t matter what gender you are, what name you go by, what appearance you have. Maybe his nickname for you will change, but that’s it. I feel like with him you may not even be aware of your gender/it’s impact, bc when you’re with him it doesn’t matter, so you feel light and free from having to think about/act like your identity. You’re just you.

jean ; I think he would be open-minded to it, albeit confused. If you took the time to explain to him what you identify as and what it means, he’ll accept it, not one for many questions. I personally believe he’d be awkward about it a bit?? But would never treat you wrong! I mean in the sense of those clumsy lgbtq+ supporters with the right attitude, if that makes sense lol? So unsurely asking if you’d like to spar...? Or constantly looking to you for confirmation on things you like, what you do, etc etc. Ik jean is supposed to be silent and intimidating, but I imagine him as a clumsy man whose seen too much and doesn’t know how to act bc he was robbed of a childhood, so yeah hopefully this makes sense!

shakespeare ; okay I’m sorry for those who like shakespeare but I feel like he’d lowkey fetishize it oof. Just like how I think he’d use unrequited love of a lesbian mc to fuel his plays, he’d think of you as interesting inspiration—at first, at least. He’d run his hand through your hair, down your lapels as he admires you, amused, and it’s only if you grew cross and forced him to see you as your identity/a person, that he may fix his unhealthy perception. After reading Vincent’s route, I’ve come to think that you really need to push against him to reach his actual feelings/past his unstable/dangerous side. Once he’s over that, he would love to cast you as male roles in his plays, bc you have even more conviction than the regular men tbh.

comte ; he’s seen even more than leonardo bc he’s immortal and timetravels; it doesn’t phase him. Tbh he just beckons you to come shopping with him so he can find you the latest male/androgynous fashion, with charming suits and coats and hats. For binding, he’ll try his best to buy you a safe kind, or he may enlist Leonardo’s help or even go to the future to find you one—nothing is too much/expensive when it comes to you. Will always treat you right/like royalty, and remind you that you’re valid and anything you need to feel that way, he will make it so. Gets a v dangerous look in his eye if someone disrespects you.

sebastian ; he’s from the future, so nothing new. Honestly he may even be relieved?? Idk he’s just so formal and polite that I think he’d feel more relaxed with another masculine/non-binary individual from the future, bc he would be able to talk in a certain way he would feel wasn’t as “proper” with a woman, if I’m making sense? He’d have no problem refering to you as your identity, and will always find a way to make you feel comfortable/valid, even if he needs to try and sew his own version of a binder for you.

Beautiful! I love the way you describe everything, so detailed! Thank you soooo much <3

Undetected

TRIGGER WARNING: THERE IS MENTION OF ATTEMPTED SUICIDE (no direct or detailed description), MENTION OF DEPRESSION, ANXIETY, SELF HATRED.

PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

Requested by: @robin-the-enby​

Abe admired you for many different reasons. One of them being that you were a talented witch. Another being that you didn’t fall into any particular category of witch, you could do all kinds of magic and more if you wanted. 

But lately…you seemed a bit off. You’d lost that spark in your eye, you took less care of yourself, you threw yourself into your work effectively cutting yourself off from the rest of the team and…more sadly, you barely paid any attention to your boyfriend anymore.

Being the only significant other Abe had ever had, he wasn’t quite sure what to do. Sure, he was well read in the romantic era of writing but that didn’t mean they had all the answers. He couldn’t just ask around, especially since the only ‘healthy’ relationship he could think of was HB and Liz. 

Keep reading

Thank you so much! This was so adorable and hilarious, the image of big demons like them being wary of such a cute little bastard...awww. But maybe if I promise to keep him in my room, I could get away with it (it’s not like I let my pet rats anywhere but my room) :D

Hi! I jad this cute idea, what if the brothers' s/o had pet rats? Would the brothers interact with them and how? Would they be disgusted? I'm really curious about your take on this one ^^

Imma be honest, my first immediate thought to this was Barbatos and his fear of rats 😂😂😂

THE BROTHERS reacting to MC owning a pet rat

Lucifer: 

He’s ashamed to say that he did indeed lose himself for a moment. He did not scream or anything of the like, but he did jump a little and you will bring it up in conversation all the time, to which he gets frustrated and like a pouty twelfth year old, but that’s not the point. At first, his fear was that Beel left some kind of animal bone out that somehow, although unlikely, had a piece of meat left and somehow, someway, the House of Lamentation got infested by rats. However, upon further inspection, it turned out to be your pet rat, and although it is an unusual pet, he decided not to say anything because he does also own a three headed dog, after all, and that would just be hypocritical. 

Mammon:

Hahahahahahah. Okay so here’s the thing. Him? Not afraid. He doesn’t care. He calls you out and weird for it because why a rat? But he also sees great potential here, seeing as a lot of people are afraid of rats. Besides Barbatos, Leviathan really doesn’t like those critters either and Mammon is sure to use that to his advantage to bribe Levi out of money. Whether or not you condone does absolutely not matter, because he’ll just sneak in and steal the rat when he wants to or needs it. Mammon might be the reason you won’t have a pet rat for much longer. 

Leviathan:

He is NOT a fan, but he’s also not a wimp. A manly Otaku if you will. So yes he screamed when he first saw that thing and yes he was about to summon Lotan to take care of it but no he would hurt your pet, are you crazy??? He’s just uhm… what if he eats the food? What if he eats Lucifer’s very important papers? You should really have better eyes on that thing, MC ! 

Satan:

Oh the rat won’t survive for long. Cats kill mice, but Satan kills everything that crosses his path, especially if it’s in close proximity to one of his books and it could potentially nibble on the pages. What was that? It’s your pet rat, MC? A cold shiver runs down his spine as he realizes his mistake. Listen… he may or may not apologize but he will definitely get you a new one… with a cage because he can’t have any of his books damaged, love. 

Asmodeus:

Screams. Jumps on the nearest high surface. Begs literally anyone to kill that thing. When you show up, he begs you to step away as he tries to collect himself enough to play hero, but he will only scream again when you pick him up. “MC! That thing has diseases!” Don’t hold it up to him either because he might actually cry and or die of a heart attack. He can NOT handle that for the life of him, and he won’t. Please, MC, find a new pet.

Beelzebub:

Lolololol, you’re cute if you think that he won’t try to catch and eat your pet. You’d be lucky if you find him before Beel swallows, and the giant will look quite sad if you stop him, “beel…. Spit him out. Now.” He pouts but slowly lets him back out, releasing a wet rat back into your hands as he apologizes. He just looked so delicious, MC! And normally people don’t keep them as pets so.. He thought he was free, game you know? 

Belphegor:

This is kinda cute because he befriended your pet rat and everytime you can’t find him, you know he’s with Belphegor, all snuggled up. You still haven’t figured out how he gets your rat to be so still and the first few times you were genuinely scared that he was dead, but he somehow always woke up when Belphie woke up so you assumed he just put some kind of spell on him. “It’s your rat and when you’re not there to cuddle, it’s the next best thing.” You felt your heart swell at his confession, watching him put the rat in his hoodie to chill. 

Aaaaaaagh, you got me hyped at the begining and certainly didn't disappoint! This was so fluffy and nice! I think you pictured Abe's feelings about the movie really well! And I'm really glad you like it too!

Hi, it's me again! Can I pretty please request a fic for Abe Sapien where the reader shows him the movie The shape of water? (If you don't know what it is, it's basically a mute woman falling in love with a fish like monster, similar to Abe) and it turns into them confessing their feelings for Abe? I'm just in the mood for fluff ^^ Thank you!

Listen you have thrown me a prompt so close to my heart like my friend, I LOVE THAT MOVIE.

Rated ROMANCE (it’s about to get fluffy af here)

A day off didn’t come often while working for the B.P.R.D and that meant it had to be taken full advantage of. Hellboy and the others were sneaking out for a night drive but you and Abe remained. It was on purpose of course, you and Abe shared a love for the simpler things in life. So, you had suggested a movie night.

Secretly nonetheless, you enjoyed spending time with Abe, alone to be more specific. You were harboring some steady feelings for him and as time progressed and you learned more about him the harder it became to deny it. Still you kept those thoughts to yourself and even though you longed to know what his heart felt when it came to you, it simply remained unspoken of.

“What are you in the mood for?” You were flipping through the library of movies as Abe settled some snacks and sat next to you. “Whatever you wish, you’ve never disappointed in your choices before” Abe was more than happy to let you take the reigns, you often recommend all sorts of movies and books. As you continued to check you landed on a movie you hadn’t seen yet but was curious about.

You held in a giggle and smiled, Abe’s gaze landed on you upon seeing the movie. “Really?” You chuckled, you were convinced if he could blush he would be right now. “Red is convinced I look at him, I don’t see it” You couldn’t help but nudge him playfully. “C’mon, let’s see what the fuzz is about, who knows maybe we’ll enjoy it” Abe settled and motioned for you to go on.

You chose the movie, its name?

The Shape of Water.

What began as a possibility to rib on Abe for his similiraties with the anfibian man in the movie quickly turned into something else.

The two of you became entranced with the story. It was enchanting, consuming and in a way it seemed to hit a little too close to home. As the romance between the mute woman and the anfibian man progressed you couldn’t help but peak looks at Abe from the corner of your eye. Abe was immersed, the story in itself was beautiful but deep within him he felt he was in fact living vicariously through this character. He harboured such romantic thoughts within his soul, romance was often something he loved to read even if he never voiced it often. His heart felt like hammering out of his chest in certain more intimate scenes.

Around the ending you took up the courage to nudge Abe with your knee. Those big dark orbes of his fell on you, there was a shyness to his posture. “I think it was beautiful, what did you think?” He moved to better address you. You felt your cheeks redden and thanked the darkness of the room for not making it so evident.

“I would’ve done the same thing, I would’ve saved him” You played with a frayed string from your jeans, you wanted to look up at Abe.

Something within you urged you to be bolder.

“I think I know exactly how she felt... when it came to him” You rubbed your hands together anxiously. “Because thats exactly how I’ve felt when it comes to you” The words were out of your mouth before you could hit the breaks and cower. The anxiety of your admission drove you to stand up abruptly. “Abe I-“ He stood as well and held your hand before you could disappear by some form of magic. “Y/N are you? Oh, you are, you meant it” The longer he held your hand the easier it all came to fruition.

Abe’s heart wanted to jackhammer out of his chest.

Movie or not, he went with his gut instead of his mind. He pulled you in and kissed you. It was something so akin to gentle it gutted you, his full lips molding against yours with so much love and want engraved in it. Your hands landed on his shoulders and before any other racing thought could crawl it’s way up into your brain, you deepened the kiss.

The movies credits continued to roll and in a way you couldn’t help but feel you had gotten the same ending.

A happy one.

Thank you so much! This was perfect! I love those four, so don't worry ^^ You really captured their personalities well, Mozart especially, that was really amazing!

Hi! I've read your headcanons and your writing is soooo good, I can't resist but to request as well. Since every time I hear that confidence is sexy (which it is) I get sad, because with my anxiety confidence is something I experience twice a year XD can I ask for headcanons with any four boys you choose (because I love them all the same) with an s/o who is just really worried of messing up all the time? I don't know how to love and be with soeone properly :') Thank you ^^

ahhhh sweetie thank you so much for the compliments !!!! i’ve struggled with anxiety myself as well, so i understand how it can feel 💖 for this i chose comte, leonardo, mozart, and napoleon ? i hope that’s okay? Xx :) you should also know that your anxiety does not make you any less of a loveable or attractive person, and that you amount to so much more than your worries 💕 i really hope these are okay and your enjoy them wahhh feel free to send me a message or request anytime, love you lots 💙💙💙

✎ desc : headcanons for comte, leonardo, mozart, and napoleon with an s/o who is anxious and gets worried about messing up || this is just fluff/comfort, but tw for anxiety mentions || gn mc

comte :

Comte is excessively, ridiculously, superlatively in love with you - there's not a single thing you could ever do or say that would change his feelings, and there's not a single thing he wouldn't do to make you feel better.

If you ever have a single worry Comte will never hesitate to sweep you off of your feet, carry you to his room, and just sit for hours on end with you wrapped up in his arms; leaning his head against your shoulder to whisper sweet nothings and gentle reassurances into your ear, his warm breath tickling your neck as he punctuates each sentence by pressing a small kiss against your skin.

This man simply adores complimenting you, and has an endless bank of loving words and earnest encouragement that will make you forget you were ever worried about making a mistake in the first place.

You’re his angel, his sweetheart, his treasure, the love of his life — and that means if you’re anxious he’s there to support you, if you do something good he’ll shower you in the highest praise, and if you do happen to make a mistake? He’s there to help you fix it, and if you would like him to he’ll teach you what to do next time.

Comte has got plenty of confidence, and he’s more than happy to share some of it with you.

As a pureblood, he’s seen it all — any mistake you could possibly make wouldn’t really phase him.

He’ll just quietly step in — absolutely never telling you off or saying a single harsh word to you — and he’ll take your hands and show you what do to; rewarding you with a lingering kiss to the forehead afterwards.

Comte is physically incapable of ever thinking a bad or disparaging thing about you, he’s on your side through it all. You give him so much constant joy and happiness — so allow yourself to lean on him a little, he’ll always be there to support you ♡

leonardo :

Leonardo has seen a lot of different things and different types of people throughout his long life, and he has never been the type of person to judge someone or be mean.

He’s always spending so much time helping others with their problems, and he’s exceptionally good at it — you truly couldn’t have anyone better to support you :’)

And when it comes to you in particular? Well, you’re his incredibly precious little tesoro, which means there’s nothing in the whole universe he wouldn’t do to help you or make you feel better.

If on any day Leo feels like you seem particularly anxious or worried about something specific, he’ll encourage you to take a break with him — dragging you to his room, or the nearest available quiet space, he’ll lie down with you; your head cradled against his warm chest as he slowly draws little shapes against your back.

If you concentrate though, you’d notice that Leonardo is not just tracing random shapes, but actually letters instead, tenderly writing his most fervent feelings across your skin. *“Ti amo”, “Sei la mia anima gemella”, “Mi hai cambiato la vita”, “Nei tuoi occhi c’è il cielo”, and many more — continuing long after you’ve fallen asleep.

If you don’t have time to take a full nap however, he’ll just hold you for a little while wherever you are — pulling his coat around your body to bring you closer to him and quietly humming an improvised little tune. After a short moment he’ll let you go again, checking how you feel and offering any help.

Even if you refuse his assistance, however, he’ll still watch from the sidelines — he wouldn’t want to interfere if you truly thought you could handle something, but he hates to ever see you struggle or worry and will step in to be by your side if he feels it’s right to do so ♡

mozart :

Mozart knows very well that he’s not always great with his words, often coming off as overly harsh or cold to most other people.

Therefore, if you seem anxious or are worried about messing up he’ll try comfort you the best way he knows how — his music.

Leading you to the music room, he’ll have you sit right next to him on the piano bench as he begins to play whichever song seems most appropriate for your particular mood.

If you seem mostly anxious and worried, he’ll play something soothing — you’ll hear the soft legato tones of his music wash over you like waves, a low and rumbling ostinato rolling in like a tender mist to ground your tumultuous mind and coax you back to tranquility. The lilting dotted rhythms of the melody nursed you gently, enticing your eyes to close; your worries leaving you in a deep sigh.

If you seem mostly sad or upset however, he’ll play something upbeat and happy instead — his hands dancing across the full tessitura of the piano like lightning, the uptempo metre conjuring your mind to imagine sparks following after his fingers. Syncopated rhythms and an odd metre gave the music a jaunty quality, the impish back and forth imitation between right and left hand like a playful conversation between good friends.

And if you seem tired or angry, he’ll play something strong and powerful — his music drawing you out of your mood, the tempest of your mind transforming into a whirlwind of sound. Harsh dissonances and polyphonic cacophony filled the room, your negative emotions seeming to run from your own mind and flow into his piano, leaving you newly energised and refreshed as the piece tumbled to a close.

You’re seine Liebe, his love, and he’ll constantly be there to cheer you on and give you support when you’re nervous or feel like you’ve messed up.

Mozart knows he’s not the best with words, and he doesn’t always know what to do in every situation, but he’ll translate his love and care for you into countless compositions — always willing to sit down and play for you. After he’s finished the piece, and you’re both feeling calmer, he’ll carefully encourage you to talk to him so you can both work towards a solution to whatever problem together ♡

napoleon :

Napoleon is naturally an extremely charming, charismatic and inspiring man. He has incredibly strong convictions and will always stand up for what he believes in — and there’s nothing, and nobody, that he believes in more than you.

He has a constant desire to protect you, so when he sees you anxious or worried about messing something up for even a second he will immediately jump into action.

With a soft, albeit slightly tense, smile he’ll take your hands and ask vey seriously if you’re okay — dearly hoping you’ll explain to him how you’re feeling and allow him help you, teach you how to do something, or just stand at the sidelines and give you his encouragement.

Napoleon just loves you so so so much, and would do anything to make you feel happy and relaxed like you deserve to be.

No language, or even combination of languages, in existence could possibly have the right words to sufficiently describe just how much happiness, support, joy, stability, and love you’ve given him just by being you. So whatever you want, whatever you need, he wants you to know he’s right there at your disposal. He is your solider. Your protector. Your lover. Your ‘Léon. Forever.

This man will make tons of little jokes and light teases to help you relax, your worries slowly beginning to melt away with the sight of his soft smile and sound of his infections laugh ringing in your ears.

Napoleon will try as hard as he can to make you smile or laugh, even if it’s only a tiny bit. He simply thinks the best way to assuage your worries, and help you feel less anxious about similar situations in the future, is to help you turn all your problems into positive memories.

He just really wants to reinforce the message that you’re safe, that everything can be fixed, that no-one will ever judge or get angry at you and most of all… that he loves you. That he’s never leaving you. That you can both accomplish anything you want by simply working together ♡

*Translations for Leonardo : (i only have an incredibly vague knowledge of Italian so if I made mistakes with any translations please tell me!) :)) <3

Ti amo = i love you

Sei la mia anima gemella = you are my soulmate

Mi hai cambiato la vita = you changed my life

Nei tuoi occhi c’è il cielo = the sky is in your eyes

Thank you! It was good and funny and sweet, don't even worry about that ^^ Just a few days ago I asked my dad to pierce my ear, twice actually. It hurts, more than a shot at a doctor, but it's nothing too bad. Plus it's quick. The only disadvantage I can see is the long healing, because now I can't sleep on my side where the pierced ear is and it's annoying.

Hi! If you're still doing the drabbles, could I please ask for Isaac, Arthur, Vincent, Leo and Will when MC pierces their ear? Like, at home, with a needle or something. Either they catch them in the act or they ask the boiz for help with like a bloody ear with a needle sticking through, you choose XD thank you!

Lmao.  So as someone who doesn’t have piercings, this is going to be interesting.

First off, Vincent has a piercings, how that boi did it I will never know.  Honestly, him and Theo probably pierced their own ears, so if Vincent were to walk in to MC jamming a needle in her ear he’d probably be like “What!  No!  Let me help sweetie” and does it for her.  Pure Innocent Baby Vincent doesn’t seem like he would be like that, but you have to remember about his own piercings. I see Isaac asking a bunch of questions.  “WHY DO YOU WANT TO STAB YOURSELF WITH A NEEDLE” wait until he finds out about a tattoo MC has, lmao.  Isaac already has a towel to clean up the blood because he expects it to go horribly.  Meanwhile MC probably does it with precision and has no issues, and Isaac is still screaming.

Leonardo?  Hmm.  I feel like he’d also help.  But this is how it would go.  MC goes up to Leonardo with this needle and is like “Hey.  I need you to stab this through my ear” and Leonardo is like “K” and puts his book down.  Then during the process he’s like “Wait.  Why am I doing this?” and MC goes “So I can put jewelry in it” and he’s like “ahh okay”  I really can’t see him reacting any other way

Now Arthur.  He’s probably going on about how you shouldn’t do it yourself, saying it isn’t sanitary, and you should go somewhere to get it done.  There’s people that do it and know what they are doing.  He is pacing back and forth while MC is sitting in front of a mirror, and as Arthur is int he middle of rambling she goes “K.  Its done” and Arthur is like “WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS DONE?? YOU DID IT ALREADY??”

*deep breath* Will.  Well irl Will had a piercing.  Made him look hella gay btw.  Like.  I want to know why he decided to do that.  We already know you’re bi, why you gotta go pierce your ear???  Anyway.  I can’t really see Will offering to help because he has no clue what to do and doesn’t want to hurt you, plus MC seems to know what she’s doing.  And he also doesn’t seem like someone would freak out over it.  He’d be like. “You got your ears pierced?  Here’s some new earrings.” He’d be super chill and be like “yay I can spoil her more”

I hope that’s good????  Idk what its like to need a needle shoved in your ear, or any part of your body.

This was so amazingly soft, it was so gentle despite the gruesome topic, how did tou even manage that???? That's some talent right there, wow. You really depicted it like you knew exactly what you were talking about (not implying you didn't), even with the quite vague description I gave you. The way you put in triggers that set off the urges, the boys helping the reader, it was those details that made the story flow so smoothly and perfectly. Wow, this was one of the best things I've read in a looooooong while. I couldn't praise it or you enough, really! Thank you so much again.

Let’s get some dinner.

Pairing: Sherlock Holmes x Reader, John Watson x Reader

Warnings: Destructive, selfharm, mentions of starvation. 

Request. Hi! Can I request a Sherlock x reader (a fic or headcanons, whatever you choose) where the reader is as destructive as he is? For example (and I’m not proud of this, trust me…) I’ve starved myself for long periods of time or randomly hurt myself, like banging my head on the wall. If you won’t write this, for any reason, just let me know. Thank you so much!

I tried to keep this one gender neutral.

Sometimes you’d get so engulfed into your work, or a case or something you were obsessing about, that everything around of you seemed to disappear. Sherlock usually had the same problem, he’d even given the ‘problem’ a name; his mind palace. And while you did not think that it was the same, John had walked in multiple times with the two of you, zoned out. If it wouldn’t be for John, the two of you would probably go on without any food for the rest of the day. Sometimes you’d go without food for more than two days, only to be reminded that you needed something in order to proces everything normally. It wasn’t that you did it on purpose. From a young age you had displayed behavior that others would deem harmful or destructive. All to yourself. And while your parents had tried multiple times to rid you of such behavior, it sort of sticked. Fortunately with some psychological help, and later on that of John and Sherlock, most of the damage would be minimal. 

Besides, not eating most of the time was great for your figure. 

As a young child you’d have mostly urges. To hit a wall. Or suddenly slam your head against the wall. There were other urges. More severe ones. There was one ‘accident’ with the knife. But after that you learned to suppress most urges. Neither you nor your parents ever wanted to experience that again. 

Now that you were an adult, living on your own, you no longer had the supervision of your parents. You’d chosen a place in the middle of London and quickly made friends with the famous detective and his friend. They looked out for you, and in some way you did the same for them. 

Most of the urges would quickly fade. And when you were near Sherlock or John, they would distract you. It was usual Sherlock who would recognize the certain facial expression you had. When you would be alone, there would be the occasional urge to slam your head. There was this one particular wall who seemed to trigger you. Which was why you’d spend most of your time in Sherlock and John’s apartment. A silent agreement the three of you had. They wouldn’t question you when you’d walk in, nor would the belittle you when you’d have one of your accidents. It was rare for John to have to patch you up. Fortunately. 

And while most of the times you went along with them on cases, this time you were in your own apartment. You weren’t certain anymore why. However you had followed the case closely. Something about a killer that would only kill certain people. Most of the victims looked like you. Which was probably why neither Sherlock or John wanted you to tag alone. Afraid of the danger they might put you in. 

So you decided to help them in your own way. Text certain details you had found. Or go online in order to find more information. A pattern maybe. You didn’t think about your environment, or the time. Only about the case and wanting to help out. You were kind of thirsty, however you had pushed the feeling away, not feeling the need to drink or eat. The only thing you did do, was shower when you felt like it. Just because it helped you think, before slipping back into a state of pure concentration. You were close. You could feel it. There was just one thing you were overlooking and you couldn’t stand it. You’d eat something later. Maybe tomorrow. But for now you just wanted to find the last piece of information you needed. Focussing on your screen made all the other urges disappear. Walking by the one wall did not seem to trigger anything, not with the case on your mind. The only thing you’d occasional do, was slam your knuckles on the table when you couldn’t find something. 

The sudden knock on your door startled you. Bringing you back to realization. “(Y/N)?”, you heard Sherlock’s voice on the other end of the door. You hadn’t heard him come back from the case. When you glanced outside you saw that it was dark. The only light coming from outside was one of the lampposts. You moved to stand, reaching out to open the door when you realized how cramped and painful your hand was. When you glanced down you noticed the blood. shit. While Sherlock or John never berated you for your destructive behavior, you could tell that it disappointed them. So when you opened your door, you hid your hand behind of your back, flashing him a smile. “Hey there Sher. How’s the case? Any details you can share?” you stepped aside when he moved inside of your home. He glanced at you for a few seconds before taking in the room. Obviously deducting what had happened here for the past.. hours? What time was it?

“Solved it yesterday actually”, Sherlock turned around so he could look at you. Your raised eyebrow made him smile, however it was quick to fade. Had he known you were trying to solve the case as well, he would have come and visited you earlier. But he had been so busy, so occupied that when John mentioned your name earlier he realized that something was off. 

Before you could speak Sherlock spoke again. Taking in your form as he explained how he had cracked the case. You groaned, slightly annoyed that the answer had been so obvious. “When was the last time you ate?” he suddenly asked, making you frown. It had been a while, you knew that yourself. And by the way Sherlock was asking it, you were certain he could tell. With your hand still ‘casually’ behind your back you stepped closer. Looking at the bottle of water next to your laptop. It was half empty. “When did we have dinner again”, it was after that when Sherlock received a text and left you, muttering about the murder. “Three days ago”, he squinted slightly at you, approaching you and putting his hand on your back so he could guide you out of your house. The tone of voice alongside with the realization that it had been three days since you ate something, made you cringe. 

You could feel you stomach hurting, and while you ignored the feeling while you were alone, now that you were in the presence of Sherlock it only stung more. The fact that you did it again. Not only did you disappoint yourself, you disappointed other people by your actions as well, and that seemed to hurt more. You didn’t speak, just walked along Sherlock as he guided you in his room. John was about to greet you, but he read the grim expression on your face and raised an eyebrow at Sherlock. You didn’t watch the exchange, but knew that John was quickly informed of the situation. “John, grab the first aid kid, (Y/N) seems to have hurt their hand”, Sherlock moved to his chair, watching you as he had you on his couch. You couldn’t read his emotions, however you felt scared by the way he eyed you. Your parents were sweet. They had done their best by helping you out. But in situations like this they would lose their cool. Your mom would cry most of the time, your dad would shout. Both not understanding what was going on in that head of yours. 

However Sherlock was not your mom or dad. He had never raised his voice with you. “I’m sorry”, you mumbled, not wanting to speak up or acknowledge that you had done something so stupid. Sherlock had guided you to his room, because he had realized before you did, that you were to weak to move on your own. Going without food for three days had made your head fuzzy and light. John sat beside you, taking your hand so he could look at it. You did the same. Seeing the bruising, the dried up blood around the knuckles. It wasn’t broken, you could tell the difference. But it was sure going to hurt for a while. John’s smile was warm. He looked tired, but he never seemed too tired to take care of you. He was too good. 

Sherlock gave you a smile of his own. They were rare. But they meant a lot to you. “Let’s get you something to eat shall we?” it was late, too late to go somewhere, but not too late to order something in. While John tended to your hand, Sherlock ordered you something to eat while he discussed the case. He was curious how far you had gotten. Maybe he just wanted to see what you had came up on your own, but at the same time he was trying to understand your pattern. He had made a mental list of whatever triggered these self-destructive behaviors. He had spoken multiple times to John about you. Checking whether he was missing something just so he could help you. Knowing that his presence made it easier for you, he had no problem in taking you under his wing.

You’d felt like a freak. But with John and Sherlock near you, you knew that there was nothing to be ashamed of. 

Keep reading

Aww, these were so sweet, thank you so much! You did well with captioning how tics feel (at least from my experience) and I really enjoyed reading this <3

Hi! Could I please request headcanons with the Durins, Bofur, Dwalin, Legolas, Elrond and anyone you'd like to add (or take out, sorry if that's too many characters) with a reader that tics? Like sometimes, random sounds slip out of them and they repeat them periodically for like a minute or so? Or sometimes hand movements or little gestures? I feel kinda embarassed of mine, so it would really help me. Thank you (also I read the nail polish headcanons and I loved them, you're amazing!)!

Absolutely!! And don't ever feel embarrassed! You are amazing, beautiful and perfect just the way you are!! Hope this meets up to your expectations! I'm not very familiar with tics and such, (I did a bit of research) so let me know how I did with the writing!

Tics (Thorin's Company x reader)

Thorin

At first, our king under the mountain doesn't know what to think

Surely he didn't hear you squeak...

To be honest, he thought you were doing it to annoy him, since your first interaction, you might have gotten off on the wrong foot 😅

And it wasn't the easiest to explain to Thorin, knowing he can be a tad thick-headed sometimes

It took a while to help him comprehend and had never seen it in your light

He understands now though, and has the most patience you have ever seen

He's never been more understanding to one person, even with his stubborn and sometimes grumpy demeanor

Thorin knows you can't help it, which is why he's instantly overprotective of you

If anyone dares make one comment, he's on their case like CRAZY

"Y/N can not help it, gilthock!"

"If you improperly console with her/him/them again, you'll face the wrath of my kin."

When the company was being chased down by Beorn, your tics were triggered and the great skin-changer could hear you from inside, clawing at the door with fury

You felt terrible, not able to contain the short exclamations and noises slipping from your mouth

But Thorin sent an icy glare to anyone who tried to hush you or tell you to keep it down

He's constantly reminding you that it's not your fault, and has become like a fatherly figure to you... Or perhaps, something more 😉

Fili and Kili

Unsurprisingly, both are also very confused little princes

Fili seems to have a bit more understanding of the seriousness of the situation, or at least maturity

(He is next in line to be king after all)

It took a while for them to adjust, since they'd never met anyone with tics before

One night, as you all sat down by the fire, the company grew a bit rowdy, which became stressful for our poor Y/N

Your tics were triggered easily by then with short yelps, and lines of curses that even made bofur blush

Ofc, you couldn't control it, but since the company had little idea of what was going on

the two brothers were quick to rush to your aid, rubbing a hand on your back as you let out a frustrated groan

"What's wrong with her, Oin?"

"I'm not sure. Is it a curse?"

"Probably dark magic!" Dori gasped

You just shook your head and managed to explain your predicament through tics that annoyed the absolute shit out of you

and embarrassed you as well >:(

After that, the princes were stuck to you like flies to honey

They would always ride their ponies by yours, offer to carry your bags, spend all day cheering you up

And more often than not, you would become less stressed and the thought of your tics would float away in the wind 😌✨

Hell, they even stood up to their own uncle after he continued to press some stressful questions about your unfortunate condition

Even if Fili and Kili are both very aware of the randomness of your outbursts, they still treat you as a normal part of the company

They'd hate for you to feel "out-of-place" as Kili put it, in their traveling party

You are so important to them both, and they'd never let you get hurt

Bofur

Meet Mr. Comedic relief

Whenever Bofur had first met you, he giggled at your little tics

Of course, he'd never meant to make you feel bad, he just thought they were absolutely adorable

Sometimes he playfully teased you about it, and that certainly didn't make you feel better

One night, he had gotten the others in the company to join him in his seemingly harmless jesting,

You just forced out laughter, hoping to convince them that you too, thought it hilarious

But after everyone had fallen asleep by the dying fire, your quiet sobs and tics were what stirred bofur

He came over and asked what was wrong, apparent worry shining in his deep brown eyes

So, reluctantly, you explained why you had little outbursts

Bofur felt awful

"Oh...oh. Oh I'm so sorry lass/laddie/leddie! I never meant any harm!"

He wrapped his huge arms around you in a big bear hug

Bofur never wanted to make anyone feel bad about themselves, especially you (his favorite member of the company 🥺)

"It's okay Bo. It's not your fault that they happen."

It takes a while for you to convince him he's not at fault, and once you do, he's never reluctant to approach you and spark up a silly conversation 😊

He has THE BEST stories

Is very good at keeping your thoughts away from your tics and cheering you up during stressful or upsetting situations

You call him "Bofur-Bear" 🥺

And he adores you so much

He doesn't really know how to react when you have ongoing outbursts, that go on for a minute or two

So he makes really corny jokes and stupidly hilarious innuendos that extract giggles from you while your having an episode

He will never let you go 🥴👉👈

Dwalin

(This Gif is so GOD DAMN FUNNY 💀)

Dwalin is, in some ways, like Thorin

Except 10x more grumpy 🙄

That's okay though, because we still love him 🥰

SUPER confused

At first, he was kinda rude :/

Said it was "disturbing to his duties"

tHAT HURT-

But one night, in the quiet of Rivendell, after everyone else had fallen asleep, you walked around the kingdom to enjoy the peace and tranquility of the elvish land

Dwalin had followed you, and when he called your name, you jumped in surprise, and it sparked a string of swearing

His eyes widened in shock in first, and then some incredible happened

He smiled :)

Just a tiny little grin, that was hardly noticeable under his thick mustache, but a smile nonetheless

"I didn't know ya' could use yer mouth like that."

You grumbled and turned back to the balcony, trying to rid yourself of his company

Regardless, he took heavy steps next to you, and slapped a thick hand against your back, as a friendly gesture

"Why are being so nice to me all of a sudden?" You asked incredulously

Dwalin sighed, but before he could answer, you yelled and slapped your hands against the marble railing

"I hadn't meant ta upset ya' that much."

You just shook your head, and proceeded to describe to him what was really going on

After that, Dwalin was silent, but gave a quick nod

He still needed time to really let the information seep through his thick head

You thought you had scared him off at first, but as your journey continued on, Dwalin actually grew closer than before

Whenever an enemy was nearby, he would look for you first, and place you behind h, out of harms way

Extra dinner? Dwalin made sure you were the first to get second portions, despite your humble protests

He gets teased by the rest of the company, and though he'll never openly admit it, he's grown very fond of you 🥴

He's not really the best at picking up on your social cues, like if he's being way overprotective

Though he tries his best, he also won't can't treat you like a regular person, more like someone who's physically injured

"Come on, Y/N let me carry ya'"

"Dwalin, seriously, I'm fine, I know how to walk-"

*picks you up anyways*

Overall, very sweet, just a bit excessive sometimes 😅❤

I just decided to stick with these few characters if you don't mind, since I have a lot of other requests to fill out, but I hope these are okay!! Thank you for your request, and I hope these were accurate enough 😅🥰

You're amazing, beautiful and never feel ashamed or embarrassed for something you can't control!! Stay strong!! ❤

Aaaaah thank you, this was so cute and amazing!

Hi! I loved your mothman headcanons! Could you do some headcanons for an eldritch being? There's not enough love for creatures older than time and space ^^ thank you <3

Sure thing! A little not-so-horrific Eldritch enby for you!

One day, you noticed some of the business around town changed their names. You thought maybe it was a town decision you missed, or maybe there was some kind of merchant conference?

Things were spelled differently. Even stores that had been in families for generations had changed overnight.

Even more odd, it seemed like the owners had changed their names too.

No one in town seemed to think anything had changed at all. You thought it could be some elaborate prank, but once buildings started to move around you realized that wasn't the case.

Then, all of a sudden, you got a letter from a relative you'd never met. They had left you their house on the coast, near a small seaside village.

You wondered if you were going insane, at first. You couldn't afford to not take the house, but it was certainly strange.

Everyone in the town was friendly, although they seemed to be a bit intimidated by you. You couldn't fathom why.

Then the dreams began.

Every night when you slept, you got the feeling you weren't alone.

You weren't scared, however; whatever the entity was, they only felt curious. Playful, even. They seemed to be able to share dreams with you.

You started sharing memories, letting them dream through your life with you. You had fantastical dreams, sensing their delight with your imagination.

They sometimes shared things with you. Sensations and images that you could experience but didn't understand.

They were never frightening. If anything, they just seemed happy to share things with you.

You started finding things around the house that reminded you of them. You didn't know how they did it, but it was charming nonetheless. Shells, antique jewelry, little tools made of animal bone, old coins.

In your dreams, the entity began showing you snippets of their form. Small amounts, at first, because each little glimpse left your mind reeling. You would awaken feeling groggy and confused.

Over time, it became more and more easy to withstand. Little sightings no longer affected you.

You knew that it was big, although trying to remember the form of it still proved a bit difficult.

Still, they radiated such joy from being seen even a little that you decided it was worth it to try again and again.

Aaaah, I love these three even more now!! And I have just tge thing to shiw Marion (but I'm not sure he'd get it hehe)

I'd loooove to fluster the science man XD But I doubt he knows what hentai is... if he did though. Oooooh man XDDDD

Hi! This is for the OCs ask game, since I love your OCs <3 How about no. 10 for Marion, Greyson and Cordelia? There are plenty more that I love with all my heart, but I didn't wanna overwhelm you😅 that said, if this is too much, feel free to pick just one of these OCs. Thanx!

Ah!!♡♡♡ I didn't think anyone would ask anything!! Thank you! (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)

Number 10 for Marion, Greyson and Cordelia: "What kind of jokes make them laugh"

( ⊙▿⊙;; ) ah--

OH NOOOOO!!! You have challenged me with trying to make the stoic people laugh!!! Skskdksjsjs!! X//Dc Oh my gosh AHHHH!!

I am just a- just a sad clown trying to figure out how to make my straight-faced friends laugh KSKSKSKSKSDKDDJEISK

*sad honking*

Oh gosh hahaha! I found this really funny! Like I'm, I'm in a room trying to tell jokes and these three just-- they just stare at me blank faced

No expression what so ever--

This is gonna be an uphill battle sjsjsjsjsj

xDDD

Oh my gosh okay, okay! Let me think!!

All three have varying degrees of wit and levels of seriousness-- I would say the hardest would be to make Greyson laugh and find something that he would find funny. Marion would probably be the easiest then, he laughs lightly at things anyway.

Mmmm... witty jokes I would say? That would be the best avenue to go down for all three of them.

Mary I can see enjoying puns or more sillier things than the other two? He would find amusement in corny science themed jokes or things like that. And he will laugh at himself if he fumbles with something and drops it. Or makes mistakes or goofs things up.

The other two-- Whooboy

Cordie is sassy, so social discord tends to makes her laugh. She really likes vibrant silly people and will gladly bring them to her stuffy family parties to get a rile out of her bloodline. PFFFT as long as she can get away with it fabulously she ahhh. . . will always be schemeing! But as for jokes that's a toughie!

And even harder for Greyson who is so.. professionally straight-faced he comes off downright intimidating AAHHH

Lemme keep analyzing here--

Both seem to be kind of serious to the point of missing jokes? They might end up taking them seriously or getting confused. Cordie would be quicker on the draw to realize that you were trying to make her laugh more than Grey-- That's for sure!!

Grey. . . I would say has a more innocent sense of humor? Like if you goofed or did something cute by accident or got flustered. That would make him smile or gently laugh. It would be a more a sign of endearment, or affection. Because he really doesn't laugh often. In a household full of humans he keeps himself on a short leash. Not engauging with others in the house often, more for their safety. Not that he would do anything, but he is the guardian of the manor, and he takes his job and presence there very seriously. He doesn't unwind much! He has a very slight sassy streak, very, very light, and that's amusing for him. . . but laughing is not common place for the bby!

Actually a fun side note just for fun! Greyson has just as much authority as the owners of the house, even though he masquerades around as the head butler. He just doesn't use his authority unless he deems it nessicary. (Like in the story when he dismisses the protagonist off to bed.) and that also accounts for him getting away with playing his perferred spooky music hehe♡

He does get away with this, and does enjoy it♡♡♡

Omg thank you so much! I love Noodle with all my heart! She's one of the coolest women I know <3

Hi! I'm not sure if I've sent a matchup request, but if yes, feel free to ignore this <3 Now, can I please request a matchup?

I'm panromantic (basically pan and asexual) and nonbinary, agender. My mbti is INFJ and I'm a cancer. I'm melancholic as well as phlegmatic. I love the chaoscore aesthetic, as well as punk and a bit of goth. So you'll either see me in torn clothes or dressed to the nines XD I'm also interested in witchcraft and paganism.

I am the therapist friend of the group as well as the comic friend. I am kind and caring to others and I'd do anything to help those I love. I am an ambivert, so I'm introverted as well as extroverted. I don't usually seek out company, but am not opposed to it. I can be both quiet and peaceful as well as chaotic and energic, it depends on who I'm with and the situation. Unfortunately, I suffer from depression and anxiety, I've been dealing with selfharm and I'm suicidal. This causes me to overthink a lot and be scared of trying out new things, because I get really stressed in new situations. The world around me often makes me depressed with all the nasty stuff that happens on the daily. But I'm getting better!

I like anything that has to do with art, I draw and paint, I love music (my most favourite gnénre is folkpunk, but I'll listen to anything and love anything with good lyrics), I was a theatre kid in middle school, I enjoy reading (mostly classics), I have a soft spot for everything dark and gloomy and what others would find ugly or disturbing. I write fanfiction on TUmblr and Wattpad, but I also write poetry.

I hope this is enough! Thanks a lot!!

Noodle!

- Sometimes the therapist friend needs someone to talk to as well! Noodle's perfect for that. She's a great active listener and is always there to help you carry the weight of your problems. She walks with you, hand in hand, towards a path with better views

- She balances you out. When you're overthinking or panicking, she's there to keep you grounded. When you're low you can rely on her to get you on your feet.

- The way she looks after you isn't entirely selfless. You bring so much colour and brightness to her life with your art, your music, and just by being yourself. She doesn't want any of that to go away.

I'm literally foaming at the mouth-

I lovelovelovelove how it's not just that the reader struggles and needs help, but that they try on their own as well, but in some instances it's too much, I apprecuate that soooooooooo much <3333

Also, don't be worried about the fic being with Alec, honestly, I was kinda hoping you'd write it with him (but Aziraphale and Crowley would be interesting to see in that scenario, as well)

All in all, I am SO glad I discovered your blog, I wish I had stumbled upon it sooner.

Unconditional Support

Alec Hardy x GN!Reader

Summary: It takes a while for you to get used to receiving love and affection, but this time it was just a little too much.

CW: angst, light crying, hurt/comfort, hiding things as a trauma response, mentions to past trauma (non-specific)

Broadchurch tag list: (send an ask to be added to a tag list!)

___ ___ ___ ___ ___

You loved to dote. Gifts, compliments, adoration. You loved to dote on your partners. You always had. Alec hadn’t quite known what to do with that when the two of you first got together. While he was incredibly loving, it took a while for him to grow comfortable enough to reciprocate. Sure, he’d gotten you flowers and held your hand walking to and from dates and things, but in terms of true and unadulterated affection? Well, that took a hot minute. 

And you were fine with it being that way. In some ways you even preferred it. You’d never been huge on physical touch, and receiving gifts? Even small ones were not within your comfort wheelhouse. 

And when Alec started bringing you home trinkets and gifts from work, or just because he could with his new promotion, well, you weren’t sure how to handle it. It had gotten to the point where you had started withdrawing from Alec, shrinking back from cuddles and only allowing small pecks on the cheek or the lips. 

The two of you still lived separately for now as this was all still relatively new and he had his daughter to take care of. In a panic one day you had shoved all his trinkets and gifts into a trunk under the end of your bed. You got things out if he was planning to come over for dinner, but other than that they stayed locked away where you didn’t have to think about it.

That lasted for a little while before you’d begun to heal. Bit by bit you started to deprogram yourself from making those responsive choices. Now, you had the items out, decorating your rental place and while they still made you vaguely uncomfortable to look at, you just kept reminding yourself that while you felt you didn’t deserve the love and the kindness, the gifts were reminders that you received it anyway. In some small degree of hope, you thought that with prolonged exposure to them, you might grow to have different opinions. After all, if Alec didn’t think you deserved them, he wouldn’t have got them for you, would he? 

“What’s wrong, love?” Alec asked, snapping you completely out of your thoughts. The two of you were at dinner, enjoying a meal that wasn’t the Broadchurch standard of fish and chips. You’d never understand why Alec didn’t like chips. They were a food staple. At least in your opinion, anyway.

You held the little square box in your hands, ribbon still tied over the top. Alec was looking nervous. Today was your anniversary, and he’d just handed you your gift. It felt like a weapon, sitting there in its soft silk ribboned wrapping. It felt like it was a grenade about to explode in your face. You hoped Alec didn’t notice that particular expression as you weren’t always good at schooling your expressions. 

“Nothing, darling,” you responded with a stiff smile. “It’s fine, this is good.” You’re not sure if you’re trying to convince him or yourself. 

Alec frowns, starting to fidget uncomfortably. 

“If you don’t want it, I can- erm, I can take it back.” You’re pretty sure you’re not imagining the hurt in his tone. He reaches out to brush your wrist and you yank your hand away as though you’d been burned. Alec looked away, shrinking back in his seat. He puts his hands in his lap, no doubt fidgeting with them there.

“No- I,” you chew on your lip hard enough to break the skin. “I don’t deserve this?” It’s phrased like a question, but- in actual fact, you mean it as a statement. You don’t deserve this. Gifts like this? Especially expensive big declarations-of-love-gifts. 

“What d’you mean?” Alec asks, making eye contact with you. The look on his face was heartbreaking. “Course you do. And it’s not about ‘deserve’, anyway.”

You averted eye contact, feeling much akin to a turtle wanting to hide in its shell. You felt tears springing up in the corners of your eyes and Alec was suddenly beside you, concern evident on his features. 

“Shit, are you alright? Maybe it was too much. I just thought- Y’ken, it’s our anniversary.” 

You were doing your best to keep the tears from falling, though one escaped anyway. Alec wiped it away with a soft tut.

“I’m sorry,” you say. “I’m just- I’m not great with gifts. I don’t know how to process them?” Again, not a question of itself, but a question begging for Alec’s understanding. 

“I see,” was his response. You dared to make eye contact. His expression was thoughtful. You could almost see the cogs turning in his mind's eye. 

“How long’s this been goin’ on then, eh?” He asks. You should have known he’d have some sort of training in understanding trauma responses. 

“Uh, for a while.” 

“Mm,” Alec hums. “Y’could have told me, love.” 

You shrug, nudging your way into his side softly. A silent plea. He wraps an arm around you and presses a kiss to the side of your head. Of course, Alec does. Alec always knows exactly what’s going to make you feel better. 

“Alright, forget the gift, eh? Let's just eat. ‘M starvin, aren’t you?” 

You’re not really all that hungry, but you nod. Grateful for the way he surreptitiously scoops up the box on his way back to his seat. He sits down again, pocketing the box. 

He doesn’t bring the box up again, not anytime soon, anyway. He doesn’t return it to the store though. 

Alec keeps the gift safe and sound. He gives it back to you one day a couple of years later- when you’ve worked through some of your trauma and he knows that he can gift it to you without incident. 

It’s a necklace with an ‘A’ in the centre. It’s gorgeous, and you wear it with love from that day on. It serves as a reminder of all you’ve overcome both individually but also as a couple as well. Alec’s heart swells with love every time he sees it glint in the sun. 

He really does adore you. You never have to question that again.