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Stabbing Thoughts

Part 1 TW: Drug mention

Ever since Psiloc had that last visit to his older sister's hive, an odd feeling welling up in the back of his mind. It never welled to the point it drove him crazy, but it also never shrunk to the point where he could forget about it. It was ever-present, a constant small pain in the back of his mind. Coming to her hive was normal, getting in and talking was normal, the meal she prepared with absolutely normal. But that drink... That drink bothered him. The odd white powder. It had no flavor, or maybe the drink was too strong for him to taste any flavor it could've had. Something like this, something so insignificant seeming SHOULDN'T have bothered him. But it did. And he hated that it bothered him. He hated how he remembered her putting it in HIS drink only, hers untouched by the odd substance. Psiloc scratched under his own chin, staring intensely at his husktop screen. He'd been watching some odd video. Something that he hoped would've filled the void in his mind. Unfortunately, it didn't. It didn't bring him any sort of comfort. No solace to his aching mind. His left pointer finger twitched, his entire left hand moving without him realizing. Palm gripping the mouse, the cursor flying across the screen. He hadn't realized he was typing, digitalized words popping up colored in vibrant blue links stung at his eyes. He squinted, rubbing his eyes with his free hand. Now unbeknownst to a good amount of people, Psiloc was a bit of.... "Master" when it came to "Odd substances", sometimes those of the illegal variety. Mentally his mind knew what he wanted to search for, but Psiloc in the real world could've seem to understand WHAT he was searching for. Was it some kind of sleeping powder? A narcotic? Hallucinogenic? It frustrated him to no wits end that he didn't know exactly what he was trying to search for. Yes, he assumed it was some kind of drug, but he couldn't put his finger on what KIND it must've been. A low hiss escaped from the Purpleblood's lips as he places his face within his hands, his ears lying flat against his face. He breathed out through clenched teeth, eyes closed tight and his face screwed up. He moved his husktop off his lap and got up, silently walking out of the respiteblock that him and his matesprite shared. He needed to get to the kitchen. He needed to get to his "Calm down" stash as he called it. Just a couple drags and he'd feel all better. That's what he kept telling himself anyways.