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the day before zero day.

cal is sitting at the dinner table with his family as they talk about their lives and ask cal about prom which was about two or three days ago. as the conversation leaves the topic of prom, when cal no longer has to talk a lot, he begins to examine his family.

he observes the way his dad stops eating when his siblings talk, the way he gives all of his children his utmost respect. he watches the way his mom’s necklace shines; he remembers it being a gift from cal’s grandmother a couple years before. he spends the longest time staring at his siblings. there’s something about the way they move, something so innocent. cal knows they don’t deserve to grow up without a big brother, but there’s nothing he can do now.

he stops eating. he isn’t hungry. there’s anticipation and excitement in his mind and hurt in his heart. his stomach can’t hold anything else besides the butterflies that fly around nonstop.

before bed, he stops by his parents room to give them a hug and a long good night wish that’s full of ‘i love you’s and ‘sweet dreams.’ he asks his siblings if they want to stay up a bit longer in his room just to talk. he has to bribe them with sugar. they don’t know it’s the last time they’ll talk to him besides a short goodbye in the following morning.

they talk for a couple hours before the three of them start yawning. despite his tiredness, cal does not sleep. he can’t.

-

in the kriegman house, andre is eating a leftover pizza from work while his mom sews and his dad is still closing up shop. he’s alone in his room with greasy hands and lips red from marinara sauce.

his mind is running at a billion miles an hour. it shouldn’t be, really, as he knows both him and cal have planned everything, but he can’t help it. what if it goes wrong? what if he gets pulled over on the way to school? what if someone misinterprets their cause?

he eats the entire pizza. fuel for the following day, he calls it. he almost vomits in his bathroom multiple times. his mom gets worried when he starts pacing around the living room, but he just tells her everything is fine.

he wishes he could call his brother or that he could hug his father. he knows both options are impossible and would raise a slight bit of suspicion. instead, he kisses his mother goodnight and doesn’t wait up for his father to get home.

he falls asleep that night will mel purring on his chest. the key for his father’s guns lays cold underneath his pillow. his outfit for zero day is already ironed and hung up in his closet.

this is his last day.