
Welcome to my unfiltered shitposting
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If any of y’all didn’t know, there’s a free online library, aka
https://openlibrary.org/
and I found like, twelve ebooks I’ve been wanting to read on there, and blasted through like three of them during the course of a boring-ass shift.
Friends with benefits: Alright now remember, absolutely no getting feelings for each other, okay?
Me already in love: Absolutely










Jenny Slate, Stage Fright (2019)

and its free
I just want to remind everyone how affordable buying food from indigenous tribes is. I live in a major city and I was able to purchase and ship (15) pounds of fish from back home to myself for cheaper than I could buy it from a grocery store here in the city. Yeah, shipping has its own environmental factors but I was able to support an indigenous owned business while also getting my groceries at a lesser cost. (Buying in bulk is always a good idea if you’re planning on having something shipped to you)
Some tribal owned grocers that ship:
Bow and Arrow (Ute Mountain)
Native Harvest (White Earth)
Red Lake Fishery (Red Lake)
Wozupi (Mdewakanton Dakota)
Ramona Farms (Gila River)
Tanka Bars (Oglala)
Indian Pueblo Store (Pueblos)
Twisted Cedar Wine (Cedar Paiutes)
Ute Bison (Ute)
Seka Hills Olive Oil and Vinegars (Yocha Dehe Wintun)
She Nah Nam Seafood (Nisqually)
Sakari Botanicals (Inupiaq)
Honor the Earth (? Anishinaabe)
Nett Lake Wild Rice (Boise Forte Anishinaabe)
Passamaquoddy maple (Passamaquoddy)
BONUS: coffee :)
Yeego Coffee (Navajo)
Spirit Mountain Roasting (Yuma Quechan)
Birchbark Coffee (Anishinaabe)
Thunder Island Coffee (Shinnecock)
Man nothing makes this world feel more dystopian for me then watching 6 year olds pull out nicer phones that mine
Man I love going to the bar with my one guy friend because he can never get the bartenders attention for the life of him so I have to order for both of us. Problem is he only drinks fruity drinks and I tend to order whiskey, so every time the bartender sees this intimidating 6’4 dude and this barely 5’3 chick and has to guess who gets the cosmo, and who gets the whiskey on the rocks. They have yet to guess right.
Another day, another unwanted porn bot following me.
One person at work likes to go into the bathrooms and switch the toilet paper the wrong way and I don’t know who they are. All I know is they’re the bane of my existence and my sworn enemy.
Listening to really obscure artist is fun till you go to look for a concert near you and the whole tour is in one state on the other side of the country or a different country entirely
Me: No I’m not into calling anyone daddy and quite frankly I think it’s a bit gross
Me after watching Bo Burnham call himself daddy in his new comedy special: Aw fuck
Here is a free pdf of the players handbook
Here is a free pdf of xanathars guide to everything
Here is a free pdf to monsters manual
Here is a free pdf to tashas cauldron of everything
Here is a free pdf to dungeon master’s guide
Here is a free pdf to volo’s guide to monsters
Here is a free pdf of mordenkainen’s tomb of foes
For all your dnd purposes
Me ever time I get called to HR at work:
Fuck I hope they fire me this time
Man is ADHD fun. I love talking to people then zoning out thinking about random bullshit and completely forgetting I was having a conversation with someone only to remember with abject horror that I was, in fact, having a conversation 3-4 sentences later. Then I get to play catch-up for the rest of the conversation and pray to god they don’t ask any questions. Always fun.
ER Nurse: So you’re a chef?
Me: Yep. Have been for 2 years now.
ER Nurse: How’d you manage to cut your finger then? Aren’t you trained with knives.
Me: I never said I was a good chef.
God I love switching video games and just fucking up the controls on the new one. Just switched over from New Vegas to Outer worlds and now I just keep t-bagging corpses trying to pull up my pip boy that I don’t have. It’s a blast.
Let’s see, I’m going on vacation for 4 day plus a days worth of driving that means I’ll need to pack....all of the underwear I own. Yes. Perfect. Completely reasonable.
Scrolling on clothing apps is always wild because your options are always:
1. Here’s a shirt that covers your nipples and nothing else. I hope you like shorts that are the size of underwear. Fuck modesty show the world your entire titty. Who ever said clothing should cover you up. You want a skirt that you can’t bend over in without flashing everyone? Say no more we have 40. Time is fading and your youth is too so here’s a skintight dress that leaves nothing to the imagination. Go wild.
Or
2. The biggest ugliest shirt you’ve ever seen. Completely unflattering t-shirts so no one can guess what your figure is like. Don’t you dare let the world see your body you slut. Cover every inch of your skin and look like shit doing it. Your body is disgusting and you know it so wear this dress that looks like a tarp. That skirt better not go above your knees Jesus is watching you. A plain black hoodie cause we know you look like shit in anything else.
And there’s no in between.
Who on earth decided things could start before 10 am. What absolute jackass thought that it was a good idea to fuck over the night owls like that. Props to you for being able to wake up early and just start your day but I don’t start functioning properly till noon sir.
My brain honestly needs to learn how to prioritize it’s actions better. If I sing while I’m driving 100% of my brain power goes to singing and driving is just left up to muscle memory. Like I know this song is a bop but we should probably use at least 10% of our focus on trying not to crash the damn car.
Got stoned listening to French music. Unfortunately I got so high I forgot that I had French music on and just though I was so high I couldn’t understand English anymore. Whoops
Gotta say this is definitely not the dystopian hellscape of a future I was hoping for. Quite disappointing overall.
Ok so hear me out. If all Gen 3 synths are composed of a modified version of Shaun’s DNA and he’s the “Father” of all modern synths and Danse is a gem 3 synth, doesn’t that make danse your grandson?
I can’t even blame babies for wanting to stick their hands in fire. I’m a grown ass adult and I want to stick my hands in fire. Fire is fucking gorgeous and God nerfed us by making it deadly.